South Park - Season 8 Edit

A and the other snail says "Well that's gonna add another hour to his time. "

A bear, mining for coal.

A big fat turd or a stupid douche. Which do you like best?

A break from what?! You haven't done anything!

A charlie horse on the thigh, and a second degree titty twister. And from the damage to his head area,

A cheeg fry?

A cheeg fry?

A day you were certainly all remember...

A deadly but compassionate ninja who protects those in trouble.

A duck? Dude, don't be stupid! Those OC kids are professional dancers!

A feel good romp for the whole family.

A giant douche.

A giant douche.

A good friend even tried to talk me out of it, and I wouldn't listen to him.

A great adventure is waiting for you ahead.

A guy moves into South Park with a FERRIS wheel in his back yard,

A little boy with three cubs, and an abortion plot.

A little midngith blue!

A lot of stupid things that we regret.

A new bright shiny star hung in the sky.

A picture of your mom's boobs?

A robot with smelly farts?

A Sexy Action News Team Special Report: Cough Medicine Abuse in School!

A store where girls can buy everything they need to be just like me!

A tragedy?

A turd sandwich is not only the first turd to be nominated school mascot, but even the first, sandwich.

A turd sandwich.

A twelve pack of Dr. Pepper, A Shoots & Ladders game used only three times,

A what?? For God's sake, where??

A white meat chicken... breast, if you will, that has been breaded,

A woman all you young ones can look up to...

A Woodland Critter Christmas!

A wunderkind psychic detective. At the crime scene, the young psychic had visions flash before his mind,

Aaaaaaaa!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

AAAAAAAAH!

AAAAAAAH!

AAAAAAAH!! AAAAAAAH!!

Aaaaaah!!

Aaaaah!

AAAAAH!

AAAAAH! Let me in, Dad!

Aaaah! Aaaah, stop!

AAAAH!!

Aaaah!!

AAAAH!!

Aaaah!! He's wearing the skin of an animal!

Aaagyaaaaah Timmih!

AAAH!

Aaand there are intransitive verbs, such as

Aagh! Aaaahh!

Aaron, I'm standing at the time border where some kind of mass protest has broken out.

Aaron, I'm standing at the time border which scientists say follow Terminator rules.

Aaron, the scientists have been able to communicate further and have uncovered

Aaron. Eh it appears that in the future,

ACK!

Action News.

Actually, Eric is still supposed to be grounded

Actually, I was hoping to see your boyfriend.

Adam Sandler is like, in love with some girl,

Adam Sandler is trapped on an island and falls in love with a coconut.

Adding a parody slant to the satire.

Admit it was our fault?

After all, they were AWESOM O's ideas.

Again?

Agh! You see guys, this is why you don't bring **** along on the away team: they don't play along!

Ah and Wall*Mart really gives back to the community! Us peopleare certainly happy to have a store like Wall*Mart,

Ah actually we were just hoping we could talk to you guys real quick.

Ah hello everyone. Achtung.

Ah I did. I wrote something down.

Ah I'll be right back. I'm gonna get some Sunny Delight.

Ah thank you, thank you. I'm happy to see that all of you. were affected by The Passion like I was.

Ah whatever, Kenny!

Ah, actually, Mr. Jefferson, we were seeing if Blanket wanted to chop wood with us

Ah, Buttters, it's getting late. You should be getting ready for bed soon

Ah, hey fellas! Ah I see you met my robot

Ah, I'd do you in, Trent. Ah, I don't wanna get involved. Or else my parents will ground me.

Ah, I'm sorry, robot, they want me to reprogram you.

Ah, no, these people claim that they are the "real" psychic detectives.

Ah, screw you hippie!

Ah, Token, can I have a quick word with you?

Ah, yes, but who are you?

Ah!

Ah!

Ah! You mean he's a Jew!

Ah. You know the answer, but not the question!

Ahh no thanks, that's okay.

Ahh testing? Hello? Okay uh, welcome everyone.

Ahh, Turd Sandwich, I will ask you not to speak out of turn.

Ahhh it isn't cheap. I've gotta keep vice off my back and secure shipments from overseas.

Aight y'all. It's showtime!

Aj, Butters, why don't you take Paris up to your room for a little while,

All alone in the world because their mother had died

All are welcome. All are welcome!

All I have to do is make people think I'm handicapped, and I get a thousand dollars.

All I know is he lives somewhere in Malibu. Now stop wasting me and Mel Gibson's time, you little wussy prick.

All I've been hearing since Mr. Jefferson moved here are sick lies!

All it takes is a little self control and personal responsibility.

All of the special athletes seem to be in tip top condition, and I can't even get past seven ru reps

All of this because of the little boy in the red poofball hat.

All right all right all right!! God!!

All right all right, quiet, children!

All right AWESOM O, time for us to get some sleep.

All right come on, let's do this! DJ! Give us a hot track!

All right dude, get in his bed.

All right everyone!

All right guys, come on. Let's go to the next house.

All right son, dancing is all about a frame of mind.

All right Stan!

All right turd sandwich!

All right you guys, we need to stay calm and just do the right thing.

All right, all right, come on come on, young man.

All right, all right!

All right, and now, dancing to the song

All right, but you guys owe me for this.

All right, Butters, keep your eyes open.

All right, Butters, tell you what:

All right, Butters!

All right, children, I have just been informed that since our school has been attacked

All right, children, let's get to rehearsin'!

All right, children, the school board has mandated that I must now teach class in both present day English and Futurespeak.

All right, dickhole! Time for you to pay!

All right, everyone! Forward, march!

All right, fine!

All right, fine! But someday you're gonna have to learn to let people in!

All right, fine! Forget it!

All right, fine.

All right, fine.

All right, fine. Come on, fatass!

All right, folks, my name is Darryl Weathers and I'm with the Construction Workers' Union.

All right, folks, our next item up for bids is this lovely 19th Century lamp.

All right, good. Now, let's all go eat some of Mrs. Gruhd's great future cooking.

All right, hang on. We're about to land

All right, here we go.

All right, it's decided. Let's all write in "Giant Douche. "

All right, let's get the hell out of here!

All right, let's go, Murphy. Hang on a second, where are, where are my car keys?

All right, let's just say all the bad things said about Mr

All right, make sure you get pictures of everything in this crime scene.

All right, Mom, look. Here's... the truth.

All right, Ms. Hilton... we'll find you another dog.

All right, nice reporting, guys. Nice.

All right, now everybody take a tablet and a pencil.

All right, now we'll see which one really has staying power. Number one?

All right, people, we are all extremely upset over what's happened.

All right, people. Let's give Blacky a nice welcome home.

All right, power it on.

All right, Sexy Action School News Team, it's time to go to work.

All right, so after my report on the unsanitary conditions of the school cafeteria,

All right, tell me about it.

All right, the county fair's still open!

All right, then you take him to the hospital, Kyle.

All right, thirty yards, Timmy! Keep it up!

All right, this is it! If Wall*Mart has a heart, we have to find it and destroy it!

All right, this one I can win!

All right, Turd Sandwich, this next question is for you.

All right, we all need to come up with ideas for our show.

All right, we gotta find three other kids that can dance.

All right, we just need one more person!

All right, we'll check this Deets guy out. But let's use that one thing that we never use.

All right, well, why don't you show me what you got?

All right, what kind of atmosphere are you reading, Vulcan Jew?

All right, what the hell is going on?! Why is there a red star glowing in the sky?

All right, when this Jefferson guy shows up,

All right, yeah, woohoo, we did it!

All right, you future bastards! Think you can take our jubs?! Well, we'll show you! Come'ere, Earl!.

All right!

All right!

All right! And now I will use my power to... turn Kyle into a chicken! Bleh!

All right! And now I will use my power to... turn Kyle into a chicken! Bleh!

All right! So, any ideas how we can stop the future from happening?

All right! Things just might work out!

All right! Woohoo! Awesome!

All right?

All right?

All right?

All right. Come on you guys, we have to get back home.

All right. Looks like I have to use my power of invisibility to get by.

All right. Now we just gotta sneak him into town.

All right. Now, where did you get served?

All right. Now, where did you get served?

All right. Thanks a lot for helping us, dude.

All right. We got served.

All the adults are trying to get us.

All the girls in South Park are gonna be total sluts from now on, so you can just get used to it.

All the students love it. It's an incredible idea called Close up Animals With a Wide Angle Lens.

All this can be yours.

All Wall*Marts start a self destruction sequence if you break a mirror in the back.

All we can do is try, Harrison.

All you ever do is talk about your balls!

Along with the cash prize of one thousand dollars.

Alright, this is gonna sting for a second.

Americans have evolved into a hairless uniform mix of all races.

And a coupon for a free side of fries with a purchase of any deloxe hamburger at Red Robin.

And a dead mom.

And a squishy thing that lives in her pants!

And a turd sandwich because it's usually the choice I'll have.

And a turd sandwich.

And all day watched abortion after abortion take place.

And all those who don't accept Christ.

And apparently the organizer is just an eight year old boy who was touched by the film.

And are now here at the time border trying to get national attention.

And as we march for The Pasion we should also voice our support!

And AWESOM O is a robot, so he don't need to eat.

And back home, there were presents, and lots of food to get fat.

And called him a pussy, so my dad came home and beat me.

And Chickadee y the chickadee, all made the forest their house.

And convinced me to stay down in a bomb shelter for three days.

And disappeared before the trial.

And do you know why?! So I can play banjo!

And each one of them had a quite interesting name

And eleven if you count the two family members that killed themselves afterward.

And enough bulk buy ramen to last us a thousand winters.

And fuck you, bitch!

And Gary and Sally here have just managed to have a child together.

And Giant Douche has... one thousand four hundred and ten. Giant Douche still wins.

And give 'em this.

And good evening, friends!

And has come back to 21st century America, uh to find a job here.

And have been able to learn that he is from the year 3045.

And he didn't deserve what happened to him in Mel Gibson's movie.

And he got served up somethin' fierce.

And he lives at 621 Castillo Street. He's usually there between seven and eleven p.

And he was immediately arrested!

And he winked at his critter friends and leapt to their side!

And he's computin' his way to my heart. My robot friend.

And he's gonna kill it again.

And he's never gonna play on me ever again!

And I am Black Taku, with the power of perfect spelling!

And I can go over to his house whenever I want!

And I got an interview with him for our news show.

And I guess your best wasn't good enough.

And I have to find the very best dancers in South Park to be on my crew.

And I made a hundred bucks!

And I would like to thank all of the students and their parents for coming.

And I'm and I'm not gonna be threatened into voting if I don't feel comfortable with it!

And I'm gonna go there and buy a thong!

And I'm Rick Cartman.

And if the Road Warrior says it, it must be true.

And if we can't report news the honest way, what good is n news reporting?

And if you can't face that, then you might as well sit here and play Leggos until you're an old man.

And if you don't believe in Mr. Jefferson, then you can just not come!

And if you miss this up, so help me GOD,

And if you'll let me, I'll be back next year. To compete with honor.

And in America, if something sucks, you're supposed to be able to get your money back!

And in the twinkling starlight, each little cub did their portion.

And inject this directly into your bloodstream

And instead you had to break through yourself. This is really the beginning of a whole new chapter of your life, Kyle.

And is having psychic visions!

And it happens once a year.

And it was the best Christmas ever for the boy in the red poofball hat.

And it... so happens that these chosen people killed your Lord.

And it's because of times like these I was forced to a life of evil.

And KYLE has to see a problem with it!

And make the robot think he's real!

And meanwhile three lion cubs were crying away

And Mel Gibson says you are a sloth and you are a liar.

And missed out on his childhood.

And Mr. Jefferson is just a nice guy

And my robot friend. My robot friend.

And no longer have to worry about whether or not you're comin' home.

And now here's Rick Cartman!

And now I understand we're going to Harrison Moore, uh, for an explanation on how the time portal works.

And now I'd like to show you my ... Wishing Tree. Jam on!

And now one of our fine young shlokas, Kyle Broflovski, has asked if he could speak to the congragation.

And now these people from the future are showin' up and offerin' to do the same work for next to nothin'!

And now you will have a place of honor, as my nineteenth victim.

And now your second nominee, Turd Sandwich.

And now, again, one man's vision ushers in a new era of aerial travel, proving the power of imagination and intellect.

And now, back to The Price is Right!

And now, for a look at the weather, here is Token Black, and Token, I hope there's no tornadoes headed our way.

And now, for a look at what's on the menu for school lunch today, here's Stan Marsh.

And now, for a quick celebrity check, here's Butters Stotch.

And now, here is Bill O' Reilly.

And now, I believe, in 2004, the ******* community needs to apologize for the death of Jesus.

And now, we proud few gathere here as a people brought together by its message!

And on my left is aging hippie liberal douche.

And on that magical day, stumbling upon all of that,

And one game we played was "Fireman. "

And our baby claws.

And our news team them, very much.

And out in the woods the boy steamed right ahead,

And panda bears for the preschoolers.

And poor people don't watch the news nyanyanyanyanya nya

And pray that maybe the other team comes down with cancer.

And said the N word out loud too many times.

And say how remarkable it is that this little boy brought us all together.

And she'll do it for ten cents an hour.

And she's ovulating.

And so he built a time portal

And so it was that God sent his only son down from heaven, to die for our sins.

And so the four ninjas were forced to join forces with Craig and his friends to find Professor Chaos,

And so the little boy and the cubs gathered around the chair base,

And so the little boy and the cubs gathered around the chair base,

And so we're putting all the best dancers in South Park together to beat Orange County.

And so, using some paper and working with glee,

And so, we will now give out the Spirit Award, to the handicapped person who came in very last. Eric Cartman!

And some new pliers.

And soon the forest would suffer from the offspring Satan begat.

And start a magical journey?

And start humpin' each other until they disappear!

And that's all for Super School News. Enjoy your day at South Park Eh .

And the challengers, the South Park Diggitys!

And the Cows had to forfeit.

And the fil o fax says he moved from yoru area.

And the most popular selection will be the school's new mascot.

And the people from the future won't exist to take our jobs!

And the police immiedately arrested the owner of Kentucky Fried Chicken.

And the second?

And the steroids made me blind to the people I was hurting.

And then cooked. I've been told there will also be tater tots, and a vegetable dish.

And then he just gets off because somebody messed up

And then I'm gonna buy you a niiice steak dinner with all the trimmings.

And there are people who need you to step up!

And there will now be a school wide vote between the top two nominations.

And these are my friends Timsy, Winky and Nod.

And they all lived happily ever after. Except for Kyle, who died of AIDS two weeks later.

And this friend belongs to a certain, Chosen People of Israel.

And threw him in a dirty prison cell with doodie feces on the walls.

And to live with a bunch of hicks who don't know anything.

And took them to where abortions are performed.

And Two Minutes In The Closet, and do ketamine.

And we asked them to lie and make up some false molestation charges.

And we have an ultimate grand special champion for 2004!

And we start to heal the wounds of all our yesterdays

And we were taking him to the vet when you fucked it all up! Butters!

And we're cut!

And we're supposed to vote between a giant douche and a turd sandwich.

And went back to the forest to set everything right!

And what about all the

And what we see now is a happier school, 100% cough medicine free.

And what we're talkin' about today are the immigrants from the future.

And whatever's troublin' you, I wanna try and, and help you with it.

And when all the ideas start coming, just write 'em down. We might not remember everything otherwise.

And when he walked up to the door, I could have sworn he was white.

And when people have children, they have to grow up!

And when that little eight year old boy walked up and flashed his... penis...

And where is your mom?

And why not? Mark here has been with Kelly for three years now.

And wishes the same for his family.

And you can change all of your evil molesting ways.

And you can't do it with us because you are too poor

And you can't play with us.

And you got rid o'her.

And you have to tell us which one would be funnier..

And you know it might be hard,

And you'll never get your mom to agree to something so horrible, so HA!

And you're a good wife, Maggie.

And your eyes looking at the ground.

And, and you know how serial killers sometimes return to the scene of the crime?

And, these immigrants won't need to come back here looking for work

And... well, I can make ends meet.

Animals Close Up With A Wide Angle Lens.

Another butterscotch candy?

Another devastating loss for the Cows last night, Eric. They were ahead

Another dog killed itself!

Another wet willie?

Anu nothing!

Anyway, as I was saying, ahh... wait I I forgot what I was saying.

Anyway, I'm pleased to be here in Douth Dark to announce the opening of my brand new store!

Anyway, it appears that the man from the future is here to stay.

Apparently it doesn't matter how hard you work.

Apparently the people from the future are having a pretty easy time finding work.

Apparently they were pretty good dancers.

Apparently you haven't heard of my "Vote or Die" campaign.

Approaching planet Omega Nine.

Are those arm and leg locks secure?

Are you all right?

Are you calling me ignorant??

Are you gonna be my new friends?

Are you gonna start running your mouth off again?

Are you having a nice day, Ms. Claridge?

Are you having Mr. Jefferson over for dinner?!

Are you kiddin'?

Are your systems stable? Run a systems check on your CPU.

Aren't I too big to be Blanket?

Aren't we havin' the best time?

Aren't we?

Argh. Jimmy...

Aright, redneck, your rebuttal?

Aright?

Aright. What say you, aging hippie liberal douche

Arrest him fast and try not to beat him.

Arrrh Timmih!

As I got older, I felt that one boy was never enough.

As it was in the times of our forefathers, so it is now.

As long as we know we have the power to change.

As the day your town... became great. The grand opening of the first South Park...

As the weeks become the months become the years.

As the weeks become the months become the years.

Asshole!

At first we needed our parents' permission, but then we told him our parents were dead.

At least another two days.

Attention students, we have tallied your mascot nomination sheets,

Aw Aw AWESOM O is coming.

Aw awwww.

Aw Christ.

Aw dude, crap. All our parents are there.

Aw Goddamnit!

Aw Jeez Jeez Louise! My mom is gonna be awful sore when she sees this mess!

Aw man, now every in town has a weapon! Lame!

Aw well, come on. Let him read us the end.

Aw, aw, no, come on, people, we're so close to completing my final solution!

Aw, come on, Dad! How come I have to go to work with you?

Aw, come on, sir.

Aw, dude.

Aw, it got Kyle and it's tearing his head off!! Aw you guys, it looks like Kyle is done for.

Aw, it's about freaking time, jackass!

Aw, you're just saying that because I broke your cat's leg last week.

Aw. Awww!

AWESOM O does not have a mom.

AWESOM O does not understand.

AWESOM O must dispense oil waste.

AWESOM O must rest! His CPU system overloading.

AWESOM O understands.

AWESOM O will answers the door.

AWESOM O will not make fun of you or tell your secrets to other people and stuff.

AWESOM O, I though you were programmed to do whatever I tell you.

AWESOM O, this is my Aunt Nellie.

AWESOM O, what are you doing? My friends are waiting for their beverages.

AWESOM O!

AWESOM O?

AWESOM O?

AWESOM O?

AWESOM O? Hey, where'd ya go?

AWESOM O?? AWESOM O, what the Sam Heck are you doing?

AWESOM OOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Awesome.

Aww man, look at them! They know they can't trip to that!

Aww man, this smells like meatloaf. Again?!

Aww man!

Aww yeah!

Aww yeah.

Aww, but why?

Aww, suck up, suck up!

Aww, that's just adorable.

Aww! Ohh! God, I just got so sleepy. I'm sorry, what were we talking about?

Aww. Uuugh. God it burns! AAAH! My soul is on fire! Whoa. Oh, I don't like this!

Awww crap, he's only got twenties! You got two dollars, Kenny??

Awww, go on and do it already!

Awww, you don't need to do that, AWESOM O.

Awww!

AWWWW!!

AWWWW!!

Awwww.

Awwww.

Awwww.

Awwwww.

AWWWWWWWWW!!!

B b bbingo!

B bani banishment?

Back in the pile everyone!

Back in time and is in a government hospital after being hit by a car.

Back off!

Back to you, Aaron.

Be at Bebe's house, tonight, at seven!

Be cool, dude. I, I think maybe he's a burn victim or something.

Be sure to take me to the same hospital!

Be sure to vote for Giant Douche.

Beavery the beaver, and Beary the bear

Because all ethnicities have mixed into one. Perhaps most interesting is how this has affected their language.

Because all the other girls are.

Because Christmas need to be bought in a store.

Because I need to, all right?! I've got something planned that's uh gonna be really sweet.

Because I, maybe I don't have what it takes to win with uhwithout them!

Because if you get served and served them back, then it's on!

Because it seems like every time we frame a rich black guy,

Because of you, nobody knows the extent of my deeds.

Because one copy is nine ninety eight! But this way you save like twenty bucks!

Because the Wall*Mart stops you. Many have tried, kid. Union leaders, nature activists,

Because their parents might find out they had weapons if Professor Chaos told on them.

Because you KNOW that your kids are goin' down when my kids give them this!

Because you're being grounded, Stanley! Now I don't wanna hear another word out of your intolerant mouth!

Because you're taking all the fairness out of the game. But I know now that even if you do win on steroids,

Because, even if Jesus wasn't really the Son of God, he was still a nice guy.

Because.

Before what happens?

Before you die, let me show you the things that I've done, so you will understand the breadth of my transformation!

Behind the school!

Being in a dance group is totally conformist.

Being spoiled and stupid and whorish is supposed to be a bad thing, remember?

Believe me I would love nothin' more than to have you quit the force

Bentonville, Arkansas. That's where Wall*Mart started, that's where all the bigwigs are.

Bewbs!

Big fat p p... p... pussy, and if you take steroids, the only decent thing to do is come forward and say,

Bitch?! Don't call me bitch! I'll pop your fuckin' head open!

Bitch.

Black sonofabitch!

Blanket doesn't need a playmate.

Blanket likes to play, don't you Blanket?

Blanket, I wanna give away all my money.

Blanket, you in here?

Blanket!! Oh my beautiful blanket!

Blanket? Blanket! Come play!

BLEHH!

Blood orgy!!!

Boobs!

Boy, Los Angeles is great, huh AWESOM O?

Boy, that was a GREAT episode!

Boy. You must really wanna take to to those Orange County kids now, huh Stan?

Boys, first of all, I want to tell you how impressed I am with your ability to get more ratings.

Boys, I do not want you going over to Mr. Jefferson's anymore.

Boys, I want to congratulate you on what is perhaps the finest piece of student television I've ever seen.

Boys, I'm afraid I have some bad news. The school has to cancel your show...

Boys, these axes are only four ninety nine.

Boys, you did it! You killed the Wall*Mart!

Boys, you have to let him rest. Some mean kid gave him a Texas Chili Bowl

Boys, you okay out there?

Boys!

Brad?

Brand new television, new plastic dishware and cups,

Breaking news at the time border. We go now live to Harrison Moore.

Breaking news here at the time portal, Aaron. It appears that another person from the future has just arrived!

Buh, Mr. Garrision, if we change our mascot that means the eco terrorists win!

Bull's eye!

But a lot of innocent people are out of jail.

But all you've got to do is start,

But aren't Indians and Redskins just as offensive?

But aren't Indians and Redskins just as offensive?

But competing against other people and getting in their faces saying "Haha! I'm better than you!" is part of life.

But competing against other people and getting in their faces saying "Haha! I'm better than you!" is part of life.

But Dad, I don't know how to dance or nothin'.

But Dad, I just wanna stay in my room

But Dad, we're not supposed to shop at

But does that mean you aren't baptized?

But don't tell anybody we have them.

But first, he has to, like, become a... boxer, or something.

But gee whiz, Stan, if you try to stop us, we'd have to use our evil satanic powers on ya.

But he thought of a plan, and he thought of it fast.

But he's our son!

But his conscience caught up with him and to the forest he did flee.

But how can the **** make it better??

But how do we start a fire?

But I am the serial killer! The one whose rightful place in history you have smirched!

But I don't suppose it really matters much. Because in the end, the way I caught the killer was with.

But I guess I'll have to go with giant douche, simply because the fact that it's a giant renders it useless,

But I know you. Framin' rich black men for crimes they didn't commit is in your blood.

But I think it's the principle of the thing that matters.

But I thought you meant the Son of God!

But I would hope that those students and their parents who question my qualities would simply look at my opponent.

But I... But I... But I can't see nothin'. I gotta go to the hospitalll!!

But I'm falling apart!

But if a woman wants to be one, it's "wrong. "

But it's times like these, when the chips are down, that a ninja shows his true character.

But let's try to speak one at a time.

But making the future better.

But Mo o o

But mom, my teacher will

But my parents told me, "never get into a car with a stranger. "

But nobody wants a Wall*Mart here!

But now that you know where our compound is, you'll either have to live with us, or be murdered

But now the good protector lay dead as the good owls amassed.

But of course, that's only if you really want to trip balls.

But one look at the packaging tells otherwise.

But others are starting to say that the time portal should be closed off.

But out in the forest, not too far away...

But Santa, what do we do about the Antichrist?

But someday you're gonna have to stop running from what happened and start dealing with it.

But Stan, don't you know, it's always between a giant douche and a turd sandwich.

But that isn't the point, Butters!

But that's because he had to work all the time when he was young

But that's when he came up with the best idea of all.

But that's... that's crap! That's not even TV!

But the black bastard was so rich he made bail

But the cold hard truth is that if we let them all come back to our time,

But the idea that we'll be whorish for money is belittling to our gender!

But the worst serving was here in the pelvic region.

But then gasped when he saw a most dreadful sight.

But then it turns out that the girl is actually a...

But there WERE no magical Christmas adventures or talking poo for me!

But these are our girls!

But they live with their mom now.

But they took action: ridded their entire town of cough medicine,

But this is real news!

But uh enough, he says, to feed his family.

But uh.

But we don't want "good," we want pain!

But we got to have a human host body for the Antichrist.

But we got to have a manger.

But we like being the Cows!

But we were finally able to arrest him.

But we're here!

But when a woman does it she's "straaange. "

But when a woman does it, it's "weeeird. "

But when they challenge you,

But why would you want to be one anyway?

But why? Maybe there is no reason.

But why??

But worse. With robots.

But you don't even wanna know the kind of stuff I've done.

But you don't have the talent.

But you got a 22 in the ratings!

But you know well that your ******* blood won't let you.

But you run the Wall*Mart.

But you your face!

But, because this is such an important film that actually depicts the selfless act of Jesus Christ,

But, does that mean you killed the mountain lion?

But, I think it's best we don't talk out loud about it until we have most of them on the trains heading to the camps.

But, Mr. Meryl, we're trying to bring the news to the students. They need to know the facts,

But, we don't know how to give abortions.

But, when a man pees standing up, it's "normal,"

But, who would have programmed it to think it was human?

But, why on earth wouldn't you wanna vote?

But, you should follow what Jesus taught instead of how he got killed.

But, you were, weren't you? Y you went to the nationals in Nebraska.

But... well that was a long time ago. I mean, we were just kids.

Butters hasn't danced since the tragedy.

Butters is our son. He's not for sale.

Butters needs medical attention right now!!

Butters which is funnier? A stupid not funny giant douche or a super funny turd sandwich?

Butters, get away from me!

Butters, Goddamnit.

Butters, listen!! At the vet's office, you need to stay down on all fours and bark a lot.

Butters, listen. There's gonna be a competition this Saturday, and we want you to join our troupe.

Butters, never get into a car with a stranger!

Butters, only gay little dweebs read the funnies!

Butters, play!

Butters, remember when you said you had a video of Eric Cartman dressed like Britney Spears?

Butters, right now!!

Butters, seen any celebrities?

Butters, we have had it with your moping around! You're gonna go outside and you're gonna play,

Butters, what is wrong with you??

Butters, will you mind telling us why you're dressed up like a bear?!

Butters, wouldn't you like to have some time away from AWESOM O?

Butters, you saw! Tell them what happened!

Butters!

Butters!

Butters! Butters, you get back here or you are grounded, mister!

Butters! He got a ninja star stuck in his eye,

Butters! We're trying to help you, Goddamnit! Now, stop being such an asshole!

Butters! Where the hell are you?!

Butters?

Butters? Butters? Come on, sweetie, it's gonna be okay.

Butters? You're dating Paris Hilton?

Butters??

Butters' new friend is a little strange.

Butterscotch candy?

Buy some robot pants? Haha, no!

By eco terrorists for the 47th time, we are going to change our school mascot.

By Eric Cartman

By God, so he is. Black and rich.

By now our parents probably know we were playing with weapons!

Bye, friends.

Bye, sweetie, we love you!

Bye!

C'mon!

Caaartmaaan! Daaaaa!

Call an ambulance.

Call it police intuition, but sonethin' in there just didn't feel right.

Calm down guys, we don't have to go tell our parents. We just need to go out and get some protection.

Calm down, turd! No Juvenile Hall turd is going to kill you. That's my job

Can help us come up with new movie ideas.

Can I help you boys?

Can I help you boys?

Can I help you boys?

Can I help you?

Can I help you?

Can I help you?

Can I help you?

Can I still dance with you guys?

Can Kyle come out and play?

Can you believe those guys paid us a hundred dollars apiece for those movie ideas?

Can you believe we're at a real live movie studio, AWESOM O?

Can you come up with an idea for a movie that will break a hundred million box office?

Can you do it, Stan. Can you build us a manger? Huh?

Can you give me back my time? Huh? Can you do that??

Can you help him, Doctor?

Can you really? Oh would you please? Could you help us?

Can you speak in present day English please?

Can you take my temperature?

Can you teach me your secret fast?

Can you teach me your secret fast?

Captain Cartman reporting from Shuttlecraft Spontaneity.

Cartman thinks he can fly off of his roof.

Cartman, I really, really have a problem with what you're doing I object to it morally, and I find it grossly offensive.

Cartman, just keep your mouth shut.

Cartman, stop it!

Cartman, what did you do?!

Cartman, you have a beautiful voice.

Cartman! I will not stand by and let you cheat your way to winning the Special Olympics!

Cartman? What the hell??

Cause what Cartman doesn't know is that I know one of his secrets!

Check it out, my not hot body!

Check them out!

Checkout line... They had these... little stickers filled with glitter!

Chef, we just got served.

Chef, you haven't seen Butters around, have you?

Chet, you are a fuckin' retard, you know that?! Even if global warming were real,

Chicken sandwich?

Chicken sandwich?

Child wunderkind Eric Cartman is now arriving on the scene.

Children, children!

Children, get back away, now!

Chinese, Turkish and, indeed, all world languages, which sounds something like this:

Choo choo train, it's all fun and games.

Choo choo train! Yay!

Choo choo train.

Chop chop!

Chop wood? No, that's ignorant.

Chris Holt joins us now. Chris?

Chris, is she serious?

Chris, she's more than twice Butters' age!

Christ died for you. Go home.

Christ died for you. Go home.

Christina Naylon has more.

Christmas is saved!

Christmas means so much to us all

Christmas means so much to us all.

Christmas means the world to us all

Christmas time is once a year.

Christmastime is once a year

Christmastime is once a year

Clap my hands. *clap* *clap*

Claridge, but actually, it was our fault.

Claridge's accident!

Close up, with a wide angle lens.

Closed doors at South Park Elementary it also has a street name.

Clyde, are you aware of what Turd Sandwich can bring to our school?

Code 6! Code 6!

Code 7! Bring in the firemen!

Coma... How long?

Coma... My God, for for how long?

Come back with a naked picture of your mom!

Come in?

Come on and take a look, folks. We've got a lot of knives for sale here.

Come on and touch my body!

Come on and touch my titties!

Come on Justin, touch my body!

Come on now, keep it tight!

Come on y'all!

Come on, AWESOM O! We're gonna go a sightseein'!

Come on, AWESOM O! You can put my laundry away!

Come on, Blanket, play with me

Come on, Blanket!

Come on, Blanket! We gotta go before your dad sees us.

Come on, Blanket.

Come on, Blanket. We have to go home and feed the animals.

Come on, Butters. You went through a lot of therapy for this.

Come on, climb the tree, climb the tree!

Come on, critter killer! Your days of slaughtering innocent little animals are over!

Come on, Dad!

Come on, doesn't anybody have any show ideas?

Come on, dude.

Come on, everybody!

Come on, firemen! Put out the fire!

Come on, guys, let's get back to our Big Wheels.

Come on, guys!

Come on, hurry! We've gotta get her to the hospital!

Come on, Kenny, we're going to Malibu!

Come on, Kenny!