Girls - Season 1 Edit

A girl that I used to date in a very tumultuous relationship

A hug? Like a hug?

Act like my life is real. You know?

Actually, I don't even know why he wants to see me. He dumped me.

Adam, I'm leaving.

Adam?

Also, I almost had sex with someone else today.

And all the ways I was fucking you up.

And all you can do is play with your own cock.

And at first it was repulsive to me,

And don't abandon me, okay?

And he touched my face.

And I am not gonna change your name.

And I did it because there was a sex scandal in my office.

And I fucking decided on you.

And I swear to God you looked exactly like this girl that I saw in this porn.

And I, literally, that night went back just to check it out 'cause I swear it was you.

And I'll see you when I see you.

And I'm gonna get him back.

And is obsessed with her mom. It's just not what I'm doing.

And saying that she has a press.

And so are you.

And someday, I'm gonna write an essay about you,

And that's not cool for you and it's not fun for me.

And the last thing he needs is more abuse from you.

And then I stopped.

And then I'm 20 minutes late, and he doesn't say anything about it.

And then walk around feeling thrilled and then sad or empty or whatever.

And then you can sue me.

And who's to say she actually has one?

And your boss.

And your dad, obviously.

And, and, and be nicer to my friends.

And, like, we're basically together now.

Are we really breaking up?

Are you fucking kidding me?

Are you kidding? I always got dumped. I never dumped a girl.

Are you stalking me?

Are you sure that's what you want? I mean, you didn't seem happy with him.

Are you, like, in love with him?

Bang, bang, bang. You have bangs, too.

Be honest with me, Rich.

Because I am an important part of this community.

Because I am gross

Because I decided on you. Don't you get that?

Because I wanted to see you. Because I wanted to see

Because that makes me sadder.

Because there's a woman standing less than 10 feet from you

Because we like...

Because you're great.

Been to his apartment, no.

Better to end it now, cut off the limb, and let the stump heal.

Boyfriend?

But I maybe think I would have.

But I will be back in time for the children.

But now I'm game.

But they were true.

But, like, mine kind of especially.

Can I send you out for a sandwich?

Can you give me a hug?

Charlie, just watch her.

CHARLIE: That's funny.

CHARLIE: Yeah.

Chastity, Lesley, me...

Considering you made me watch this all afternoon.

Could you hug me again?

Didn't you already quit your job?

Do not break up with me.

Do you feel like your heart's gonna just fall out through your vagina?

Do you think I'm pathetic and disgusting?

Do you think you would've liked it?

Do you wanna stay until I finish?

Do you want blowjobs?

Do you want something? You want me to get you water or food?

Do you want to step on my balls?

Does it turn you on?

Don't be a tattletale, Jeff.

Don't make a scene.

Down she goes.

Even love.

Everything has a place. It's awesome.

Except by me. I love you that much.

For the story, Hannah.

Fuck.

Fucker.

Good work, keep it up.

Great, so for a sandwich.

Great.

Hannah, wait, are you on drugs?

Hannah, you barely have the wherewithal

Hannah?

Hannah.

Have you ever looked into that?

He has other plans for you and I.

He touches my butt, Chastity, Lesley...

He was snooping through all my stuff. That's like a crime.

He would like that. I would never. Why?

He, like, kissed me and kissed me and kissed me and he said, Be who you are.

He'll find someone else, someone who appreciates his kind of smothering love.

He's not some dick hole for you to toy around with.

Hey, if you're feeling better in like an hour,

Hmm.

How did you know I was in New York?

How he was torturing me. How sad I was, and he responded in such a lovely way.

I am here to see you.

I am letting you know that it is okay for you to act on this fantasy

I am so impressed.

I am unsmotable.

I ate something, and I'm scared now.

I can even move in here.

I can't move. I'm very scared.

I could sue you, you know.

I decided on you.

I did. I told you a bunch of times.

I do. I like it.

I do. I swear. I wish I'd never found it, but I did.

I don't know what that means.

I don't know what there is left to say.

I don't know what there is left to say.

I don't know, just to be an asshole.

I don't know, some guy... Him, that guy.

I don't like it when you ass fuck my best friend in the heart.

I don't think there's food, but I can get you some...

I don't want to go fucking other girls

I hate everyone who loves me.

I hope to God no one thinks you're here to see me.

I just tried to fuck you, sue you, and extort you.

I just want you to know that I think you're special.

I just...

I kept telling you to come over.

I kept telling you.

I knew you were crazy, but fucking perv?

I know what you're about, and I don't like it.

I know you want to fuck me.

I know, it's embarrassing. What? You've never been dumped?

I like the smell of your hair and I like the sound of your voice

I like the way it finely clashes with your mascara.

I love you. I love you.

I mean, well, Ray helped.

I need his address.

I never make things up.

I think you're great. I think you're beautiful.

I told him everything.

I want cab money.

I want to break up.

I wanted to tell you that I actually just quit my job.

I will. I don't care. I'll do... I will do whatever it takes, just...

I won't.

I wouldn't even want to stay here if I wanted to.

I'll answer your sister's IMs.

I'll do whatever you ask, honestly. I will... (SIGHS)

I'll give you blowjobs, okay?

I'll kick Hannah out.

I'm a married man, Hannah.

I'm actually just leaving.

I'm definitely not happy now.

I'm fucking nuts. Why would you want me in your office?

I'm going out,

I'm gonna get him back.

I'm gonna move in next month. So your whole sexy geisha outfit...

I'm gonna put on my party dress and my sorry face,

I'm gonna use your bathroom.

I'm gonna work through lunch.

I'm kind of in the middle of something.

I'm not flattered by sexual harassment.

I'm not, like, trying to frame you.

I'm only writing this down because it's starting to smell

I'm quitting this job, and it's for sexual reasons.

I'm right here.

I'm right here. I'm right here.

I'm so glad you're not my dad or my boyfriend.

I'm sorry!

I'm sorry. No, Hannah.

I'm, like, making your fantasies come true. Why are you laughing?

I'm...

I've been able to tell since I first started working here.

I've got a boyfriend. You know what? Adults try things.

I've never been to his apartment, okay? So I need his address.

If you had read the essay and it wasn't about you,

In a way you would distinctly dis enjoy. We sue you.

In the traditional sense.

In which one's Vespa gets destroyed for no reason, gets...

Insult me, that's fine.

Is he hot?

Is that what you want?

Is that you're so keen on Gillian and yet you're calling me.

It is a journal! Why would she lie in the journal?

It just kind of aggressively clashes.

It was called Sophomore Sluts.

It's a bummer, but people do outgrow each other.

It's like a Target ad. Perfect.

It's not quite Target ad but...

It's not that hard. I take the bus to the train.

It's not yours to write about, Hannah. It's my life.

It's notes for a book.

It's okay, I'm right here.

It's pathetic and bad and disgusting and weird and lazy.

It's that real.

It's totally cool. I have like 15 from gift bags. They're free, so...

JEFF: So, we'll be back around 7:00, but if we're late,

Jessa, is that Katherine's lipstick?

Jessa, Jessa.

Just aggressively just clashing.

Just as, like, a piece of writing.

Just because someone is kind doesn't mean they're right.

Just breathe, okay?

Just order pizza or some takeout...

KATHERINE: So those keys did not work to the storage unit,

Keep my fucking eye on you.

Kind of, yeah.

Like a Bath & Body Works in here.

Like what kind of plans?

Like, a 13 year old girl who rides horses

Listen, please don't quit.

Look, I get you, okay?

Look, we're not grown ups.

Look...

Marnie has to stop whining and break up with him already.

MARNIE: I did nothing wrong! I didn't write it!

Maybe I do. I don't... Yeah.

Maybe you just can't see this that clearly because you've never been loved this much

Maybe you're embarrassed because it's not that big.

Maybe.

Might need to face up to the fact that you're just not meant for a job

More than you are. Yeah, maybe I am. Okay?

My band is playing right next door if you wanna come.

My boss. My former boss.

Nice.

No tomato, though. I don't...

No, because I didn't do it.

No, Hannah knows nothing.

No, he's not hot. He's like 100 years old.

No, I don't think you're bad. I mean, everyone does it...

No, I never... I never... No, no. Please...

No, I'm just saying that I feel that journal implies,

No, maybe that's why you don't want me to touch it.

No, no, it's just... I mean...

No, put your shit down.

No, they're Hannah's feelings about your feelings.

Of course it will be painful, but she's already in so much agony,

Oh, my God, Marnie's stuck to this pole.

Oh, my God, Shoshanna.

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God. I want one.

Oh, no. We are not going to have sex.

Oh.

Okay, be honest.

Okay, but just not Ray.

Okay, come here. Kiss me, kiss me.

Okay, drop the sandwich stuff.

Okay, I deserve honesty and respect

Okay, I didn't leave my notebook out.

Okay, I don't know what you're saying.

Okay, I don't want to split hairs here, but it's actually not a journal, it's a notebook.

Okay, I wish I'd never found it.

Okay, I'm going.

Okay, I'm really serious. I've been with Gillian for six months now.

Okay, I'm right here.

Okay, I'm sorry. I'll go now.

Okay, I'm still here.

Okay, so just so you know what you just saw,

Okay, stay.

Okay, where you going?

Okay, you're lying.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. What? Who?

Or does it disgust you? Do you think I'm really bad?

Other than the fact that we have already been together for so long.

Picture us having sex?

Please don't, just don't

Please, don't break up with me.

Please, don't leave. I don't feel comfortable.

Please, no.

Please.

Plus if you have a big cock, you should use it on a woman.

Plus if you have a big cock, you should use it on a woman.

Put it down. That's not what this is.

Read it, Hannah.

Really?

Really.

Rich, you don't need to fight it.

RICH: Chastity, sweetheart, would you show Hannah how to break down a freaking box?

Right.

Said we wouldn't... Or whatever.

See, you're laughing. I don't think it's funny. But that's fine.

Seriously, it looks awesome in here.

Shake my hand. (LAUGHS)

She has a small press.

She's 38?

She's actually ready for a mature relationship, unlike...

She's old, like a mom.

Shh

Shut up. You know what?

Sir, I have half a mind to call the authorities. How dare you?

Six months or until someone stops having fun.

So I don't know if you thought that I was gone already,

So I think we should just do this before I change my mind.

So I'm not gonna complain about the whole thing

So this is where the party's at.

So we're just gonna have to buy new boogie boards.

So why don't you write me a check for 1,000 bucks

So you want the whole fucking world

Sometimes you say shit that sounds made up.

Stay, stay.

Stuck in a prison of his kindness.

Thank you.

Thanks, hon. Just plop them on the desk there.

That is disgusting. I would never.

That is not my journal. Those aren't my feelings.

That is the point, is not to lie!

That was me showing that I cannot be emoted.

That's my dad. I can't take any more of that in my life.

That's the kind of thing you do right before you hit us. Don't hit us!

That's the sex scandal you were talking about?

That's what I've learned.

The files you requested, Rich.

The fucking community of this apartment.

Then what the fuck are you doing here right now?

There's no suing app on your iPhone.

There's nothing keeping us together

These things have an expiration date, okay?

Think about it.

This is a different job than the other one I quit,

This is an inappropriate way to talk to your employer.

To get to work at 10:00 a.m., let alone sue somebody.

To hear all your valuable thoughts about my relationship?

To hear the honesty in your voice. Just read it.

To watch me touch my own cock?

Turkey, rye, Russian dressing.

Typically, I'd ask for a blowjob or something, but I don't even want to hate fuck you.

Uh...

Um... To meet a friend from San Francisco.

Watch this girl while I go fuck my girlfriend.

We are not gonna have sex.

We can get past this.

We don't have kids.

We work together.

Well, are you in love with me?

Well, guys like that will try anything once.

Well, he was, but...

Well, I can't fuck anyone 'cause I have a boyfriend.

Well, I keep my money in my drawer.

Well, it's not exactly easy for me to get here from work, so...

Well, that's on you, kid. 'Cause I'm done growing.

Well, you know, she's 38 years old.

What about Gillian?

What are you doing?

What color's that, awkward marine?

What community?

What did you eat? What did you drink?

What do you like about it?

What does it look like I'm doing?

What should I do?

What was happening with my old friend.

What?

What?

What's going on is that you kept acting like you wanted to fuck me,

What's going on with, you know... Hannah.

Whatever.

Where are you, um... Oh.

Whoa.

Whole office, class action, we go Erin Brockovich on your ass

Why are you stuck to a pole?

Why don't you just, like,

Why don't you just, like,

Why don't you say that to me again like you mean it?

Why not? I love that stuff.

Why?

Will you be okay for five minutes?

Yeah, books.

Yeah, but I don't want to outgrow each other.

Yeah, I am.

Yeah, I know. I think it came out pretty good, you're right.

Yeah, I'm lying because I want to sound so cool.

Yeah, okay, well...

Yeah, sometimes.

Yeah, sometimes.

Yeah, well, then everything bad happens to you.

Yeah, well, you never sleep here.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Yes, actually.

You are? That's a crazy thing to do.

You can send me anywhere, anytime. It's my job.

You can't do... Hey, you can't do this to me anymore.

You did your makeup like I told you to.

You do, why? Why do you think that?

You don't know how to do anything, but you have so much potential.

You had these bangs and that headband.

You have a beautiful mind, a beautiful...

You heard me, you filthy boy. I want cab money.

You know what it's like to not have me here?

You know, don't

You know, for the story.

You know? I did

You like this? Having me watch you?

You look fancy.

You need to tell me next time you're rolling through.

You never told me to come over here.

You rung me up just to say hello.

You said some really, really mean things about our relationship.

You should hump him.

You should probably write that down, by the way.

You shrink me up, balls right in my stomach.

You told me everything you want out of a relationship

You told me to lose your number till Christmas.

You watch porn?

You're a batshit little perv.

You're gonna be fine. I'm gonna be here with you.

You're like all secretly sad.

You're lucky I don't take all your money

You're not in love with me anymore.

You're not in love with me anymore.

You're not in love with me.

You're sort of flattered by the whole thing.

You've done real damage.

You've never...

A Target ad? Yeah.

All right, let me know what you think. Ray.

And I drop the lawsuit. Jesus! (LAUGHING)

And I'm taking one. You are?

And, Marnie? Yeah?

Are you jealous? No, I'm not jealous.

Are you okay? I can't move. I'm stuck to this pole.

but I am still here. No, I know.

But I'm having fun. No, you're not.

Can you dance later? Marnie...

Charlie! Relax, I'm fine.

Charlie's a good guy, okay? I know.

Come on, Ray. Don't gesture like that.

Eggshell blue. Eggshell blue?

Excuse me? I could sue you.

Gillian. Hard Gillian.

Hannah, Hannah, I've been looking for you. Hi! Hi!

Hannah, just read it. Marnie doesn't want me to read it.

Hey, Marnie? What?

Hi, everyone. Hi.

Hi. Hi. Hi.

Hmm. But what does strike me as odd

How much? $20.

How's that? That feels better.

I can't. Why not?

I can't... Oh!

I did you a favor. ...rolled off a dock.

I don't care. How can you not care?

I hear you. Okay.

I just want to dance for five minutes. Charlie, Charlie.

I know. You know?

I love you. I love you.

I'm leaving. Oh.

I'm not leaving you. Thank you, I really appreciate this.

I'm not okay. Marnie, Charlie.

I'm really sorry. Why don't you say that to me again?

I'm so sorry. Gillian. I'm really happy

I'm sorry! That's fine. Just hurry up.

I'm sorry! You like saying that. Say it again.

I'm sorry. Are you sorry?

I'm sorry. Say it one more time!

I'm sorry. What?

Is it bad? Really bad.

Is the music going like... (VOCALIZES) Yes, yes, yes.

It's not that big. It's not?

It's okay. Ow!

It's okay. Ow.

Just breathe. I'm breathing.

Just read it. I need to hear...

Keep your face close to mine. Okay.

Keep your face close to mine. What?

make me feel safe and then abandon me. Okay.

My ankle knob and my knee! CHARLIE: Fuck you!

No, I can't. She's stuck to the pole. She's stuck to a pole?

Okay, I built this. I built this fucking thing. MARNIE: You're being crazy.

Okay, I really can't. Okay.

Okay? Okay.

Okay. Okay.

Please. Please what?

Plop. (CHUCKLES)

Ray? Just finishing up with a customer here.

Really. Really?

Scissor Sisters! Scissor Sisters!

See you, Jeff. Yeah. See you.

Seriously? Yeah.

She's a publisher. Of what? Books?

so I said you could fuck me. No, no, not at all.

So... Well, I will now.

Stay. Okay.

That's not necessarily a bad... Just finish, just finish.

That's so true. Didn't fucking write it.

That's what that feels like. HANNAH: Oh, my God!

That's what that feels like. Holy shit!

Then we had sex. Because we were kissing.

Up top? Like this? Yeah.

We did? Yeah, you did.

We don't share a house. But I love your house.

What are those? Pot brownies.

What is funny? Nothing, nothing.

What's on them? Jell O shots.

When did I say that? Yesterday.

Who? Adam.

Why, then? For the story.

with my girlfriend. Really?

Yeah, but then you kissed me. You looked sad.

Yeah, I'm sorry. How sorry?

Yeah, of course you can. Thanks.

Yes. If you know,

Yo, kid. Hey, grown up.

You all right? I'm scared.

You are. You don't pay rent.

You did all of this? Yeah.

You don't like it? I don't like it, okay?

You don't love me. I really love you.

You guys are fucking dicks. You really hurt me.

You guys are fucking dicks. You really hurt me.

You love Gillian. Yes, yes, yes.

You only have hundreds. Fuck!

You shouldn't do that. Why?

You want to get past this? Yeah.

You're a dick. So are you. Charlie! Come back.

You're fine. You don't know that.

'Cause my life is real.

'Cause she could just be, like, running off copies at Kinko's

(ALL CHUCKLING AWKWARDLY)

(BOTH MOANING)

(BUZZES OPEN)

(CHUCKLES)

(CHUCKLES)

(DOOR OPENS)

(DOOR SLAMS)

(DOOR SLAMS)

(GROANS)

(HEARTBEATS PLAYING)

(INFINITY GUITARS PLAYING)

(KNOCK AT DOOR)

(LAUGHS)

(SLAMS DOOR)

(SLURPS)

(SLURPS)

(SNEEZES)

(WHIMPERS)

$30, because I also want pizza and gum.