The Golden Girls - Season 1 Edit

A bald girl with a nose ring.

A bathroom that works!

A bear is eating you. What's to love?

A beautiful stole. You can't replace it.

A big belch.

A bottle cover for the sherry.

A bubble is something that just sits there and presses

A bunch of us get together and send our pictures in to Willard Scott

A castle? Oh, that's very exciting! Would you like some help with your makeup?

A cheap, tawdry, bare bulb den of iniquity?

A cocker spaniel's not a large dog.

A coffee shop?

A dollar? I will have you know the day I bought these salt and pepper shakers

A drunk in a Chevy... took my world away.

A fast talking pepperoni salesman gallops into town.

A father came in in a three piece suit and defended Tiffany,

A few. You know, his hair's a little thinner, he's put on a little weight.

A Guamanian, I guess. What does this have to do with renting the room?

A gutter ball! We won! We won! I won! I won!

A heart attack is crazy.

A heart attack's bigger. I've seen a heart attack. Charlie had a heart attack.

A husband like Dirk could keep me young another 20 years.

A lateral fusion pipe.

A life jacket and a great big smile!

A little Ben Gay on my knees.

A little Deep Heat on my neck.

A little late in life. Oh, I'll go.

A little Vicks on my chest.

A lot of things were still taboo. Certain people were not to mix.

A lovely lunch in a lovely house with your lovely friends.

A man his age is used to a trim body with good tone.

A man?

A motel? Dorothy!

A mother knows when her child is lying it's like bat radar.

A mouse saved my life once.

A pizza recipe, some dough, and a dream

A problem? Let's look at it.

A slight discoloration of the whites of her eyes.

A special meal on the plane, and put an oxygen tank in the garage?

A stranger, Stanley, a total stranger, told me that my marriage was over.

A tenderness in the upper right quadrant,

A tin of these and a bottle of cold duck, you'll be prying him off the wall.

A training bra?

A triple decker BLT, a hearty helping of homemade potato salad,

A week later, we became Lutherans.

A witch? He cast me as a witch?

A Yankee from New Jersey.

A Yankee, a Yankee?

A youthful relationship. A relationship that I want.

Aah!

Aah! Oh, Dorothy, you scared me. What are you doing up so late?

Abbondanzal

About a month... but that's not why I'm here.

About death, Rose.

About his prostate problems.

About our policy in Guatemala.

About there not being that much between you and Chrissy?

About what?

Absolutely not! Now, I have to go.

Absolutely!

Absolutely. As long as they don't add a swimsuit competition.

Absolutely. I'd just have to see other men behind his back.

Accompanied by our national anthem."

According to the New York Times, he is the most exciting new novelist

Actually, I've never been with a married man.

Actually, it's possessed by Miami Federal.

Actually, number five, six, and seven B.

Actually, that first night

Actually, the more damning evidence was a snapshot they found of Duncan

Actually, you're both wrong. It does not belong in a refrigerator.

Actually, your ears are your worst feature. But competitive is right up there!

After a good night's sleep, you won't be so testy.

After a while, I learned I could use my looks to my advantage,

After all these years.

After all, besides you, who else is there?

After all, I was married to one for 38 years.

After all, she's quite a showpiece. Where do I install it?

After all, she's the only family I have.

After Daddy died and you kids moved out,

After I butted ahead of 25 students.

After I drink milk, I go right to sleep.

After that, no other herring would do it.

After what went down between us

Against my ear.

Ah, great news! I stopped by the courthouse this morning

Ah, why don't we all sit down.

Ah, wonderful. I like being with Ma. I want to spend more time with her.

Ah! I'll get the silverware.

Ah.

Ah. You and Augie have been seeing a lot of each other

Al... the big jerk.

All Blanche said was he still has his own teeth and hair.

All I could do was sit and feel sorry for myself, which is what I did all the time.

All I ever do is study.

All I ever wanted to do is look cute in my new outfit.

All I ever wanted was to look cute in my bowling outfit.

All I have to do is talk forever.

All I know is that Dorothy should find out

All I know is, girls, I'm in a no win situation here.

All I know is, I was alone and terrified and I have never gotten over it.

All I know is, when I had a husband, I didn't worry.

All I know is, when the lights went out at night, I wasn't afraid.

All in all, it hasn't been half bad.

All is forgiven!

All it takes is one little dessert and my panties cut off my circulation.

All Mom and Dad ever do is fight. They don't even know I exist.

All mothers think their babies are special.

All my life you've taken everything that ever meant anything to me.

All of a sudden, bam, a dead body.

All our lives, Lily was the one who always took care of me.

All right, a bug. Yes, I have killed bugs...

All right, all right! Aah, there's my little girl!

All right, Dorothy. I'm ready. Now tell me your bad news.

All right, Dorothy. You go get 'em, darlin'. Go get 'em good.

All right, everybody's started except us. Could we please begin?

All right, fine.

All right, fine. But if I win,

All right, girls, now hold it right there, and I'm not fooling around!

All right, I have had it!

All right, I have not decided what to do about Stan.

All right, I want an answer and I want it now.

All right, I'll go back.

All right, I'll see you in a week. Now, I'll call myself collect tonight

All right, maybe I don't have a date.

All right, now, attention, everyone. I want to propose a toast.

All right, now, Rose, go on. I don't want dead people in my house.

All right, now, you all. Please, no more rat talk.

All right, so what's the verdict?

All right, tell me everything you ate today.

All right, then I'm not going in on this nightstick.

All right, this has gone far enough!

All right, try this dressing and tell me what you think.

All right, who put the Raisin Bran in the refrigerator?

All right, you have a few more wrinkles

All right, you're a little thicker around the middle so is Blanche!

All right!

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right. I guess you ladies are going into your feminist phase

All right. If I can get through an entire wedding with him,

All that time we wasted hating each other from when we were kids.

All the food's already on the table. We didn't want to waste precious time.

All the men I meet act so old.

All the single men under 80 are cocaine smugglers.

All this is gonna be too much for her.

All those things happened. And because they happened,

All to friendship.

All we have to do to win is just stay calm, cool, and collected.

All you need to know are two phrases yes, and no, your roommate can't watch.

All your mother wants to do is be treated like a woman.

Although, quite frankly, I am sometimes mistaken for one.

Always check in as Mr. and Mrs. Don Shula.

Always mouthing off about how her hair was curlier than mine,

Am I on Candid Camera?

An auto mechanic is the last person to take a car to.

An awful nightmare, just terrible.

An excellent lover?

An incredibly revealing lace nightie,

An old lady with a tin can could raise so much dough?

And 12 little girls started to dance.

And a 60% employee discount on day old Danish.

And a double letter score is 18, 19, 20, 23.

And a gargoyle fell off the building,

And a great big slice of double chocolate fudge cake.

And a headstone that marks her grave.

And a highway patrolman said, "Pardon me, ma'am.

And a man's career is at stake!

And a much better dresser.

And a nice tossed salad with the blue cheese dressing.

And a soft train whistle in the distance,

And a Spanish/English dictionary.

And a triple word score makes a total of 69 points. I win.

And after awhile, he moved in.

And after Daddy'd hung the star at the very top of the tree,

And after I finished all that, I still had to take care of Larry, my one eyed pig.

And after lots of hard work and long hours, ten years later,

And all you two can do is go on about your silly concert.

And almost electrocuted her.

And an electric blanket. Every time I call you, it seems you have a cold!

And an Enquirer and I guess maybe one serious newsmagazine

And an excellent lover.

And And my pictures of the children.

And as far as I'm concerned, you can go do it to yourself.

And at any age, the loving would make it worthwhile.

And at Christmas, I've been known to put away more than one eggnog.

And at my age, it's nice to have someone to share it with.

And at seven percent, you couldn't blast me out of here.

And because I did, a lot of other women didn't have to go through the same thing.

And because of that, I wear it all the time.

And become an old maid like your Aunt Regina

And before I knew it, he dragged me to the police station.

And believe me, whoever gets these tickets is gonna be very grateful.

And Bert Convy shops in my grocery store.

And Bobby Buck McAIlister and I were enjoying a glass of punch

And breathed air into my limp little body!

And burial? I hate small spaces.

And by the time I got through, I was the 12th caller.

And carpenters and mechanics and delivery boys.

And Charlie said it was after Labor Day and he couldn't wear white.

And Charlie... Well, there's not a day goes by that I don't think about him.

And Cheryl Tiegs really buys her clothes at Sears.

And Dad got you that puppy for your birthday.

And Daddy, this is Dorothy.

And discuss what we think the clouds look like.

And do a little puppet show called "Elf Kingdom. "

And do you know what's on the other side of that lateral fusion pipe?

And don't forget, that program was my idea, too.

And don't worry about anything else.

And Dorothy explained to me that he was the university interviewer.

And drink wine spritzers and drive Volvos.

And drive carefully. This wind is terrible.

And dropped his gun, and it went off and shot him in the forehead.

And Duncan Osgood can walk the streets a free man.

And every single one of them has been impressed by the caviar

And every time they tried to set him and his ship on fire,

And everything he spent his lifetime building. He needs help.

And everything that I used to worry about in...

And everything was just so perfect and before I knew it, I said, "Yes. "

And exchange prize winning pecan pie recipes.

And excitement on the side and it's not for me.

And flowers on the toilet seat cover. I feel like I'm going in the woods.

And for two months, I was a Rockette under an assumed name.

And for what? So you could get divorced.

And give that boy the love and attention he deserves,

And Goldilocks and the Three Bears is why you prefer not to sleep alone.

And got a copy of our property map.

And groaning in agony was the parking attendant.

And guess what? She let me buy the tickets!

And guilt I have been suffering. I wasn't totally honest with you.

And have the tree hauled away?

And he doesn't make noises when he chews.

And he forbade me ever to see Andrew again. So, of course, I didn't.

And he had put up one of those little stands on the sidewalk.

And he just asked me to dinner to talk about something important.

And he proposed.

And he said, "Hold on, ma'am." He put me on hold,

And he sent me to my room for all of Christmas Eve...

And he told me he loved me and... then it was over.

And he wanted to bargain in a dark alley.

And he was all dressed when the paramedics got there.

And he was writhing and groaning and screaming in agony.

And he's still interested.

And he's wearing the cutest little gray suit I think I've ever seen.

And her perception is a little, you know, distorted.

And here I thought I was impressing you.

And his lips would drink from the galvanized spout

And his seasonings.

And how do you feel about that?

And how she would never have to lift a finger for anything

And I almost had a heart attack.

And I am crazy about him! I haven't felt this way about a man ever before.

And I bought a nickel policy on my red wagon.

And I care too much about myself to let that happen.

And I completely forgot that I was older.

And I could take care of the catering!

And I decided that

And I did.

And I don't have to wear flats when I go out with you.

And I don't need any advice. I can handle it.

And I finally fainted and I hit my head

And I finally get to have what you tried to cheat me out of.

And I get one. I am very susceptible.

And I guess I get too gung ho about things.

And I had to hold my breath all the way down

And I had to spend the day with the kids.

And I had to stay there because I had a concussion,

And I had to wear that green dress, which you knew was my most awful color.

And I happen to like you.

And I have no intention of repeating this course.

And I have something extremely important to discuss with you.

And I have to go over the documents with her.

And I heard humming.

And I just hope that you and Kate have all the happiness in the world!

And I keep having this recurring dream

And I know she's gonna ask me to come live with her again,

And I know they do, but, you know, he hardly has time for them.

And I look down and I've got this scorpion tattooed on my belly.

And I love you too, Dennis!

And I love you, Ma...

And I love you. I love all my children.

And I mean that from the bottom of my heart.

And I meant what I said about that diet of yours.

And I missed out on a lot of things because of that fear! Then, one day...

And I need some peace to do it.

And I never heard from him again until today.

And I never regretted that decision because I knew that someday,

And I promise you she will never want for anything.

And I put a pair of gray flannel pants on him...

And I put on quite a bit of weight. Plus, I was not a 20 year old.

And I raised my daughter the same way.

And I read that one out of every three people will get cancer.

And I remember what it looks like on me.

And I said, "I'll think it over. "

And I saw her eat some sausages and peppers.

And I stood over him, and I looked at this pitiable creature,

And I think I did.

And I think it's because one of you won the big award.

And I thought, "I can take care of myself!"

And I thought, "What a shame if I die now. I'm too young. "

And I turned around and dropped him.

And I used to think to myself,

And I want to especially thank you for that pillow from first class.

And I want to lie in state, and then be buried in Arlington Cemetery.

And I want you and your friends to come as my guests.

And I want you to know, we'll all sleep a lot better knowing you're off duty tonight.

And I wanted to take a little bit back with me.

And I was good. I was cute and I was good, real good.

And I was in desperate need of a bridge and two crowns.

And I was working behind the cosmetics counter at the Rexall drugstore.

And I'd hate to see you have to repeat it.

And I'd have to take care of him.

And I'd study even harder. In fact, you made me so mad,

And I'd want my pictures of Charlie and the animals.

And I'll fix you a little snack.

And I'll just drop dead right here.

And I'll see you tomorrow at the office, Jonathan.

And I'll see you tomorrow night.

And I'm afraid if we make love, I'll kill you.

And I'm famous for my Lindstrom surprise.

And I'm giving her a little wedding here in Miami and I wanted to invite you.

And I'm glad that Elliot is bonging every woman at your country club!

And I'm just gonna say no.

And I'm not about to part with Mr. Peepers.

And I'm not in heaven if I have to worry about you. "'

And I'm not speaking to you, either!

And I'm playing an ugly old witch 'cause you stole my part!

And I'm sorry I never tried acting.

And I'm still paying for an encyclopedia that my son used just once

And I'm wearing the wrong underwear.

And I've learned to cope with just about anything.

And if anything is missing, I will give your names to every narc in this city.

And if I don't get my degree, the museum won't even consider me for that promotion.

And if I were you, I sure wouldn't jog without a muumuu.

And if it's all right with you, I wouldn't mind living here full time.

And if you do come back, that means you did.

And if you stay and work at it and everything turns out,

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you threw a party

And if you want to invite your father, I'm willing to keep the peace

And if you're not better by Monday, give me a call.

And it is his responsibility to remove it.

And it obviously means more to Stan than it does to me.

And it turned out that my instincts were right

And it turned out to be the smartest thing I could have done,

And it was a rotten thing to do!

And it was nice to be noticed, to be liked.

And it was nice to have someone to talk to.

And it would mean so much.

And it'll be a lot nicer to fall asleep from being tired than crying.

And it'll be hard no to, you know, because I like him so much,

And it's all my fault!

And it's starting to get on my nerves.

And it's terrible to think that the two of you were almost kept apart

And John Cameron Swayze.

And just a little short of breath.

And just had watercress for lunch

And kiss away the little droplet of butter that always drizzled down my chin.

And kiss our new TV goodbye. Isn't that right, Mr. Longfellow?

And Larry stopped dead in his tracks.

And later on we'll sit down and go over that application you filled out.

And listen to what I have to say.

And look, these just adorable sequined socks.

And loving and children and diapers and school plays and Little League.

And make love in the mud.

And marching down the aisle on my father's arm.

And maybe he's right. Maybe I do look awful.

And me with Billy...

And mixed vegetables and ground lamb and throw them all together.

And my father was chosen to pull the float.

And my first time was on our wedding night.

And my fish oil protein. I'm getting younger with each passing day!

And my gears are grinding.

And my kids agree with me. They're really crazy about you.

And neither can Blanche and neither can Rose.

And neither is Rose.

And no one likes me anyway.

And not Gresham on the coast.

And not just for her, for me. I wanna get to know her like a grownup.

And not leave our hotel room until the board of health threatens us.

And not telling him he had the wrong sister.

And not trying to squeeze in a week for a honeymoon.

And now it's over, and the robbers are gone.

And now she's hiding some deep, dark secret about Charley!

And now that you're getting older,

And now we've got a chance to start all over.

And now you cannot get enough of the friendly skies.

And now you're getting even by telling me.

And now, for the moment that you have all been waiting for.

And now, I own a lot of companies with branches all over the world.

And occasionally, I run through the sprinklers and don't wear a bathing cap.

And offered to autograph it for me

And once I got out there and started learning a few things,

And one little girl wet her pants.

And one morning, I woke up and it was gone.

And only you and Jonathan can decide

And our little starched white pinafores and our little Mary Jane shoes.

And parting with them is an extremely painful sacrifice on my part.

And perform in some honky tonk?

And Petunia was about to give birth to her piglets.

And please, Ma, try not to argue with Phil's wife.

And polite. And good at math.

And Pop's nose.

And put it on his linguine instead of in his ear.

And realized I was even more devastating by moonlight.

And remove yourself from my property.

And respected all my life can turn himself into a clown.

And right after that, my wagon was destroyed.

And scared and by yourself.

And second of all, it doesn't go in the refrigerator it goes in the cabinet.

And she came here to tell you. Is that it?

And she jiggled the tree and the star fell off and broke.

And she led a very happy rest of her life baking,

And she never could take gym class, no, because she had a tipped uterus,

And she never did any housework because she had a spastic colon.

And she overhears the towel lady telling Mrs. Steinbeck

And she really liked the idea of maybe coming out.

And she stinks at it!

And she was the first woman in St. Olaf's to ever have a pilot's license.

And she'd marry him.

And she's a little pale and a little tired.

And since we're going away for the weekend, and since we already have,

And six of them died of stomach ailments.

And so familiar.

And so, after I threw up, I pass out in this tattoo parlor, right?

And somebody told me he just bought a farm.

And sometimes, he'd wear his underwear on the outside of his pants.

And speaking of jokes, Stan, that is some toupee you've got.

And start hating me if I ask him to do all this!

And stealing my father's truck to drive to a bar in the city to meet Clel Lightener.

And succumb to the Vesuvius of passion that is about to erupt from me.

And sugar, I think that now is finally the time to do it.

And tell the truth, no matter how much it might hurt all of us.

And tell them they're spending tonight with their daddy?

And that kind of marriage just can't work. At least, it can't for me.

And that no matter what happens, even if we all get married, we'll stick together.

And that terrifies me.

And that the other dogs would laugh at her.

And that's amazing. You know, every time you tell me you love me,

And that's Sophia. That's Kate's grandma.

And that's the big secret?

And that's where I first met Eddie, the Aqua Midget.

And the activities on board ship, well, the list goes on forever!

And the amazing thing is,

And the authorities picked him up in the duty free shop in Freeport.

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card attached would say

And the card should read,

And the children would sing along,

And the dumb blonde who's not gonna get any.

And the elevator stopped on every floor, and I had to hold my breath all that time.

And the expensive restaurants

And the good years, and the happy Christmases.

And the jet.

And the lean years, when the business failed.

And the Lindstroms wanted to train them for the circus.

And the marathon, but who keeps track?

And the minister can bury me with Mr. Pinkus.

And the most incredible blue eyes I had ever seen.

And the mushrooms with Gorgonzola.

And the next day, maybe better still.

And the odds on that seem pretty slim.

And the prettiest smile on either side of the Mason Dixon Line!

And the sheriff I told him about me, how I kill men...

And then a ******* heaven, with libraries and furriers and...

And then a separate, Protestant heaven,

And then after an eternity, he comes back on the line, eating chips.

And then after lunch, she walked out of the restaurant

And then along towards the end of the meal,

And then another, and another. You know what I mean?

And then before long, you've got an entire snowman built out of lies!

And then bring them back?

And then Clyde would never speak to me again for telling!

And then end up in the woods just beyond the barn.

And then everybody would tickle each other

And then finally, it came time for the night of the recital.

And then for dessert, he took me to this most romantic little bistro.

And then he said, crunching his chips,

And then how can I forget the pain and the hatred that I felt when he left me?

And then I find it so hard to get out again without touching the doorknob.

And then I got into my car and caught a glimpse of myself,

And then I realized I was feeling good because of you.

And then I saw the answer right in front of me.

And then later, I cried because there was so much pain,

And then one day, I had to make a decision.

And then one day, Stanley's gonna be out of your life completely.

And then one night at the country club,

And then pay the rest off on time.

And then she had to talk the entire time.

And then the one good kidney I have left stops working?

And then the two of you signed up together.

And then they'd paint faces on their socks

And then this afternoon she had the cannelloni

And then tie a sock around to keep it warm.

And then we had a fight.

And then we pack. We're leaving early.

And then we'd decorate the tree.

And then what happened?

And then when I turned 16, it seemed like everything changed overnight.

And then you have to tell another one to cover up the first.

And then, after awhile, if you still want to be a husband,

And then, when he found the bullets, we'd make love.

And there are too many years left, and I don't know what to do.

And there wasn't even a man in the room.

And there's a man kneeling over her.

And there's always a little gem of wisdom hidden deep, deep, deep inside.

And there's even some talk about us going up to Palm Beach to be in the cotillion!

And they showed that Al's arteries were completely clogged.

And think it over one more day.

And think pleasant thoughts. Come on, now. One, two, three.

And this is Sophia.

And this rush of water swept the bridge away.

And those green things that grow under boats.

And to be frank, passing this course is very important to me.

And to tell the truth, I don't even know what I want to tell him.

And to think they made a movie about that deadbeat Gandhi,

And told me that the baby Jesus was mad at me for ruining his birthday.

And tomorrow you're gonna feel a lot better.

And tried to neuter the Swensen brothers.

And twice my bra size!

And use the money towards one of those new stereo models.

And wake me up. You know, if you didn't drink before bedtime,

And wants me and not you and it is eating your guts out.

And watch out for the wad of gum on the 41 st.

And we are not watching Another Worldl

And we have no right to make her feel guilty about it. Now I really have to go.

And we hope we'll see you again soon.

And we sure had a good time last year, didn't we, partner?

And we won't have said some important stuff.

And wham! My eyes bugged out, my hair shot straight up.

And what if I give her my kidney

And when her father gets out of prison, she'll be a wealthy woman.

And when I got back, I had poison ivy and you had Tom.

And when I looked into those eyes, they told me it was not time

And when I open my mouth to scream, all I can do is gargle.

And when the bus gets to you don't know where,

And when they're really good, you don't even hear the phone.

And while the men were discussing business on the veranda,

And while the waiter was glazing my peaches,

And while we're down here, I'm gonna go to astronaut camp.

And with a new farm and everything.

And with Dorothy, there is so much more. I'm sorry, Chrissy.

And wondering if I'd get through another Sunday dinner at your mother's house.

And worldly and wealthy and has never had a pimple in her life.

And worrying if you'd get through your gallbladder surgery.

And you also have a sister who loves you.

And you always used to smell from Midnight in Paris perfume.

And you believed him? That is the oldest line in the book.

And you found him on the lawn.

And you had the gall to scold me like a child in front of all those people!

And you haven't even had a chance to tell your story.

And you know what else I don't understand?

And you know what else I don't understand?

And you say, "Good news, darling. You don't have to. He's dead."

And you still didn't get the part.

And you take some stranger's word over mine?

And you two, Heckle and Jeckle.

And you were so sure that we couldn't do it ourselves.

And you were the volunteer dummy for the firemen's CPR class.

And you won't have to lie to the phone company. Goodbye.

And you won't have to listen to me nag.

And you, Dorothy, are a tall disappointment.

And you'll have your space. And you can sit home on Friday night

And you'll tell them I'm not home and that way you'll know I arrived safely

And young, with a great body.

And your designer luggage and you think you're better than everybody else.

And, "let's just lie down on the bed and watch television."

And, it was a surprise.

And, of course, if I'm married again, I'd want a picture of my new husband.

And, you think you could ever forgive me?

And?

And... 'cause I'm happy that, you know, I'm your favorite.

And... Viking history?

Anger is like a piece of shredded wheat?

Another date with Mrs. O'Brien's husband?

Another hot dog, Ma?

Another hour looking for her house. We finally find the house,

Another part can begin. Now I'm really gonna unpack.

Anybody can see you couldn't get those past your knees.

Anyhow, my first was Billy.

Anything else I can tell you about the place?

Anything on your plate is suddenly on their diet.

Anyway, I liked him. He was very understanding.

Anyway, I remember a butcher block table was involved...

Anyway, it was the 50th anniversary celebration of the founding of our town

Anyway, one summer she decided to...

Anyway, she found a guy with a few less miles on his surfboard and that was that.

Anyway, that's when I fell in love with Charlie.

Anyway, the point is guilt is a very bad thing. Story over.

Anyway, we just loved being with each other.

Anyway, we started talking and in 30 seconds, I was in love.

Anyway, you'll never guess what happened.

Appointments are the easy part.

Are hurting Charley. Husband and granddaughter, respectively.

Are my little wedding elves still busy packing their tiny bundles?

Are you deaf? I heard him from here.

Are you depressed about Glen?

Are you experiencing the same symptoms?

Are you kid? This is the highest I've seen. Look.

Are you kidding? After what we ate, we'd have to walk to Canada.

Are you kidding? He was crazy about me.

Are you kidding? It's a riot!

Are you planning to come back?

Are you prepared... either of you?

Are you quiet?

Are you saying you don't know if you'd give me a kidney?

Are you saying you won't take me back?

Are you serious?

Are you sure you don't want to go take a ride and look at our swamp?

Are you sure you wanna go through with this?

Are you sure?

Are you sure? I'm getting a very strong vibration.

Are you sure? Tuesday night, I'm getting together with a couple of buddies.

Are you telling me that you'd feel the same way about him

Are you trying to tell us... that you are stunned?

Are you two coming? The spaghetti is getting cold!

Are you up for a night on the town with two handsome, eligible bachelors?

Are you waiting for one now?

Are you wearing something?

Are you... Are you really all right?

Arnie said he just did it because it was there!

Arnie wants me to go away with him on a cruise to the Bahamas.

Arnie... I slept with him.

Arnie's fine! We had a wonderful time.

Around my tiny little waist.

Around your alleged tiny little waist.

Arrivadercil

As a matter of fact, I'd only be in the hospital overnight.

As far as that professor is concerned, you should report him immediately.

As it turns out, it wasn't such a bad thing to do.

As long as Glen and Dorothy are realistic and discreet about their situation,

As long as you're out there, Rose, why don't you pull some weeds?

As my mother has undoubtedly already told you and the rest of Miami,

As the reverend was performing the funeral service,

As what, Secretary of State?

As you usually do in these stories. The two of you made passionate love

Ask the towel lady!

Astronaut camp? There's a camp for astronauts? Is it close by?

At 7 am, I pee.

At ease, Rose. Come on, honey, why don't you get some sleep?

At first, it didn't move so well.

At first.

At least Blanche has been there and she knows what I'm going through.

At least not in the kitchen. No, that's not entirely true.

At least we're together. We have each other.

At least you have the comfort of knowing you did the right thing.

At least you're doing well in your other two courses.

At me?

At Miss MacGyver's Finishing School.

At my age, I can't worry about that. This is special.

At night, I could be Godzilla, you'd be thrilled.

At one of those schools for the blind.

At our age, long engagements don't make sense.

At that age, you don't even have to be pretty and you're pretty.

At that moment. I was convinced I'd blown it.

At the courthouse this morning, and as you can clearly see, the tree is yours.

At the Dairy Queen only lasts till five.

At the Graceland gift shop, I thought I saw the King himself walk by,

At your age, just out of nowhere to decide you're just gonna go off

Augie's a terrific guy. And a gentleman!

Augustine Bagatelli.

Aunt Blanche, do you remember what I looked like as a kid?

Aunt Blanche, I can't believe you're here.

Aunt Blanche, I'm 20 years old.

Aunt Blanche, I'm a grown woman. I can live my life any way I want to.

Aunt Blanche, only you could understand what happened.

Aunt Blanche, wait. You're embarrassing me.

Aunt Jean? You never told me that.

Aunt Teresa didn't have a heart.

Aw. Rose, did you hear that?

Babysitters, neighbors, friends.

Back home, everybody calls him Big Daddy.

Back home, most people start off with, "How do?"

Back in Minnesota, we'd settle this kind of a dispute

Backstabbing, self centered Jezebel, and I am very glad that this happened

Barry Glick is in town.

Barry Glick is very important to you.

Barry Glick! Ma, Ma, look, look Barry Glick!

Barry was the man that I wanted to be the first.

Be his friend, be his lover. Don't be his slave

Be right back.

Beats the hell out of me.

Because a baby was sleeping in the day. And then I think he called me an idiot.

Because as we say in the plumbing game...

Because he kept saying, "Blanche, how do you feel?"

Because he's the only guy my age who doesn't wear his pants up to his chin.

Because I feel lousy, and being mean to you makes me feel better.

Because I think Jonathan's gonna ask me to marry him.

Because I'll be the one accepting the award.

Because I'm the one who actually won it.

Because I'm the one who's gonna marry you.

Because if you don't, I'll kill you, you know that.

Because in a few hours, there will be a handsome new toilet at my door.

Because it was the moment I've been dreaming about

Because nobody or nothing can make me young again.

Because now I know really what kind of person you are.

Because of a field hockey incident.

Because she made me and my big sister Charmaine miserable our entire lives.

Because she wanted to kill them, Rose.

Because the only time your brother's wife goes into the kitchen, it's to get a cold beer.

Because their mothers are.

Because there's nothing in your mind to read.

Because they know we're better than they are.

Because tomatoes leave stains.