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Home > South Park (1997) - Season...
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South Park (1997) - Season 24

South Park (1997) - Season 24

I'm sorry, but South Park is actually an animated television show, not a movie or a song. It was created by Trey Parker and Matt Stone and first premiered in 1997. The show attracted a massive following due to its sharp satirical humor, outrageous storylines, and its fearless approach to tackling controversial topics.

Season 24 of South Park continued its tradition of delivering hilarious and often controversial episodes that critique various aspects of society. The show maintains its unique animation style, combining cutout-style paper animations with computer-generated imagery.

The main cast of South Park includes the voices of Trey Parker and Matt Stone, who provide the voices for the majority of the characters. They bring to life iconic characters such as Stan Marsh, Eric Cartman, Kyle Broflovski, and Kenny McCormick. Additionally, other voice actors contribute to the show, including Mona Marshall, April Stewart, and Isaac Hayes, who voices the character of Chef.

As one of the longest-running animated television shows, South Park has consistently pushed boundaries and challenged societal norms. Season 24 continued this trend, taking on hot-button issues such as political correctness, cancel culture, and the COVID-19 pandemic. The show's creators fearlessly confront these topics, often using satire and exaggeration to make their points.

South Park has a reputation for its irreverent and often offensive humor, but beneath the surface, it also provides astute social commentary. The show cleverly uses its outrageous characters and storylines to expose flaws in society and provoke audiences to reflect on their own beliefs and values.

To enhance the experience of watching the show, you can find many South Park sounds available to play and download. These sounds range from catchphrases like Cartman's iconic "Respect my authority!" to the show's theme song and various sound effects used throughout the episodes. They add an extra layer of fun and nostalgia to fans of the show.

South Park has gained a cult following over the years, with its satirical humor and fearless approach resonating with audiences worldwide. The show's ability to stay topical and relevant season after season is a testament to the creativity and ingenuity of its creators.

In conclusion, South Park Season 24, along with the previous seasons, embodies the show's unique brand of humor, combining satire, irreverence, and social commentary. The talented cast of voice actors, including Trey Parker and Matt Stone, bring the characters to life, making the show a must-watch for fans of animated comedy. If you're a fan of South Park, you can further immerse yourself in the world of the show by exploring and downloading the wide variety of South Park sounds available.

A And it was a great idea to do a special.
A bat in Wuhan?
A big, happy gathering at Build A Bear
A billion different possibilities
A man in China had sex with a pangolin
A monster of his magnitude.
A mustache?
A Pandemic Special, Randy? Really?
A reported one in 10 people in Park County
A seedy part of China.
A special has to end, Sharon,
A special Tegridy weed.
A way for artists to not only keep ownership
A weed so powerful, I couldn't even call it a special.
A word of that shit. You're just doing all this
Aaaah! God!
Aah!
Aargh! Ohh!
About all the things Uncle Kyle is doing to us.
About Butters. I think he's sick.
About everything during the pandemic.
About NFTs that's your target audience, baby!
About our super secret rebel group, Scott!
About some great deals on headphones at Best Buy.
About wanting to go to school...
Absolutely nothing. They are totally the same
Across a billion different realities.
Actually killed everyone else in the room.
ADULT KYLE: I don't think so, Clyde.
ADULT STAN: Clyde, stop!
ADULT STAN: Every night I have the same dream,
After the pandemic, my mom wanted a divorce
Again, what really matters is that we decode
Ah, come on!
Ah, Jesus. Anything else?
Ah...?
Ahp! Ahp! No unnecessary deaths!
Alexa, can you please find the nearest
Alexa, find the nearest co working coffee flex space
Alexa, find the nearest liquor store.
Alexa, fucking just go throw yourself out a window.
Alexa, I said I fucked up.
Alexa, please, we have to get to the asylum
Alexa, set a course for South Park Mental Asylum.
Alexa, set a reminder that I need to stay positive.
Alexa, set an alarm for 7:00 a.m.
Alexa, set an alarm for 7:00 a.m.
Alexa, start the car!
Alexa, start the car!
Alexa, start the car!
Alexa, stop!
Alexa, stop!
Alexa, what's going on?
ALEXA: Tegridy Weed?
ALEXA: There's some kind of road closure ahead.
Alexa! Find the fastest route back to the lab!
Alexa! Set a course for South Park Mental Asylum
All flights into South Park are delayed.
All I have to do now is sort of guide the avalanche
All I'm saying is that we can't let
All of his confidential work and his wild experiments.
All of them except one.
All of these documents we found in Kenny's lab
All of this is our fault, and we can't do it without you.
All on the possibilities of time travel.
All over South Park this morning,
All over South Park this morning,
All right, fine, what else is going on in the news? Quick!
All right, guys, let me help you out with that.
All right, thank you. It is now 9:01. Lights out.
All right, that was about five minutes.
All right, we're on it. Come on, dude!
All right, well,
All right, you ready to have some fun, Butters?
All right! All right! Who the fuck put you up to this?
All South Park residents are now exposed
All the aluminum foil is stuck
All the time when we were little.
All this horrible stuff going on, and...
All this time, the bad guys we were after,
All this time, we've been trying to figure out
All we can do now is try and change the way people think!
ALL: Cheers!
ALL: Let's go, Nuggets!
ALL: That's okay!
Allowed Kenny to time travel.
Alright, children, welcome back to class.
Alright, men!
Alright, students, shut up.
Alright. Group 5, it's now mealtime!
Aluminum foil?
Aluminum foil? The fuck?
Am I time traveling now?
Amazing ******* qualities.
Amazing, really.
An all new hybrid of our best weed
An all parent meeting tomorrow, and officials are hopeful
An opportunity to go back in time
And a only maximum party of four can visit at one time.
And a wonderful friend.
And access your building from the roof.
And all his fellow scientists go missing.
And all you can think about is making a special about it?
And also I'm shutting down the city and I'm a pervert.
And and called for a pump and dump,
And are working on a vaccine.
And as highways into town close
And as they do, scientists say
And as we all return now to our homes
And ask them for help. Is that what you want?
And became argumentative, combative, pessimistic assholes.
And by the way, there's a tankless humidifier
And change the past so that you and I possibly never even meet.
And confirm that it did, in fact, come from
And confirm that it did, in fact, come from
And could be running around spreading mustaches right now!
And deserve to be treated as such.
And died screaming that it was the flippening.
And do stuff. What do I get to do?
And do things that I used to do, but I can't.
And Dr. Anthony Fauci arrived
And expecting us to fall in line and go along with it all but...
And FDA chief is on line three.
And finally getting on with our lives.
And finally we can say, we are starting to
And fuck shit up you wanna join us?
And governments consider a full lockdown,
And has therefore been named Kenny McCormikron.
And have leftover residual shellfish ness.
And he hid something for us to find.
And he was texting me, too.
And he'd like to share that with all of you.
And he's a self hating Jew.
And he's out somewhere probably trying to get
And here it is.
And his sister was in the barn and she burned to death.
And hit his head?
And how we should all suck their dick!
And humanitarian, Dr. Kenny McCormick.
And I am glad to have you all come here today to help me
And I am going back home to the city!
And I am not going to jail for you!
And I can't do Space Jam 2.
And I did all this because I just want my life back.
And I don't have anywhere to stay.
And I don't understand all of this.
And I have no family here.
And I have some things I need to tell him
And I have to say I...
And I know we will all thrive as elementary schoolteachers.
And I saw an ad for the Center for People
And I swear to God if you don't help me,
And I want you to have this.
And I was Kenny McCormick's very, very best friend.
And I'll be out of my room having to hang out with you!
And I'll be right out to the car.
And I'm scared what it's doing to me.
And I'm sorry, but focusing on
And I'm supposed to be your protector.
And I'm very sorry for your loss.
And I've never heard of him.
And if anybody here casts a movie with someone
And if you just believe in NFTs then I believe in NFTs and then
And in his death,
And is at this very moment
And it made you want to pound beer and wine?
And it was a bad idea and we were just,
And just destroy the people around you.
And just try and relax
And let people see that...
And let the FDA chief know he can eat shit off my balls.
And let's show this town just what great leaders we can be.
And lots of people know about NFTs!
And made all our futures so very bright, but whatever it was...
And made billions trading in NFTs.
And make school the way it was.
And many people are fearing the worst.
And maybe enjoy some of the Pandemic Special.
And more rules, and who's gonna fight
And more rules, and who's gonna fight
And my amazing kids, that are right over there.
And NFTs allow that to happen spontaneously, organically
And nobody would have gotten shot.
And nobody's gonna make Space Jam 2!
And now here he is, the king of woke comedy, Jimmy!
And now it... is the key to saving us all.
And one of the students here is really sick.
And other cryptocurrency 'cause,
And our family and friends must be cherished.
And our little group will never have needed to exist.
And our lives, I think that a lot like Abraham
And our love for one another and fight through it
And people are beginning to say enough is enough.
And relive the whole thing again...
And reverse playback ten seconds.
And save our family.
And saying it's for his own good.
And scientists are asking all South Park County residents
And see if anyone else shows up
And see, that's your Stoney Duck NFT.
And she didn't do shit for the farm
And she owned half of the farm.
And since the students broke quarantine,
And so his mother couldn't take the loss
And so let's take the time now to reach out to our friends.
And some aren't, but we have to do all we can
And somehow stop Bill Clinton, wouldn't you have to do it?
And stand by your beliefs even if it means others will die.
And start fighting with each other?
And stay indoors. Thank you.
And stop the pandemic from ever happening.
And stop them from taking over...
And stop time travel at all costs.
And that got us thinking...
And that he is a fantastic person.
And that I am very sorry,
And that is your prerogative. Mute!
And that started COVID. That man was me.
And that's us, baby!
And that's why I'm very proud to announce
And the hospital won't say how.
And the teachers will be staying with them.
And then a few hours ago, this thing appeared on his face.
And then build him a bear!
And then do what?
And then flown to the facility here
And then he died,
And then I found a great ******* woman and...
And then it was May. And then they said wait until summer!
And then just when it seemed like we'd turned a corner,
And then m maybe take a shower.
And then realized this was the only way,
And then slipped on the old people diarrhea
And then they go and find buyers for their NFTs!
And then we were like, "Yeah, okay, yeah,
And then you took me out and sold me on how great China was
And then, these guys over here started saying
And there's Marley Jarvis,
And they actually aren't afraid to
And they're really fantastic people.
And this is Chicken Fried Steak.
And this is our homeroom teacher's assistant,
And this was all back in October.
And time travel.
And try not to change your expression.
And under complete lockdown for the unforeseeable future.
And we all failed.
And we blew our chance to stop COVID.
And we do not go to non essential businesses
And we don't know where it is.
And we feel prepared to welcome your students back.
And we find where Kenny hid the information.
And we humans are cleaning up the mess
And we now know the cause of his death.
And we're just trying to find some aluminum foil!
And we've got to get control of this thing!
And wear a mask...
And what about you, Kyle? You were the one
And what exactly is pholidota?
And what if he's not?
And what we needed more than anything was to
And what we should have done then
And you always seem to come back to this concept
And you can eat shit off my balls and die.
And you couldn't have known your mom would shoot herself
And you know what? Fuck these people!
And you say you've never had a mustache before?
And you're gonna start tomorrow!
And your bullshit yarmulke.
And your mom and your sister!
And your Stoney Duck NFT is completely unique,
And, in fact, we've pinpointed the virus
ANDREW CUOMO: It's called social distancing.
ANNOUNCER: "Very mysterious circumstances."
ANNOUNCER: Live from the Moderna Center
ANNOUNCER: Remember, folks,
Another one trying to get out!
Another strain of COVID,
Any drugs or alcohol?
Any fucking gender specific language in here.
Any symptoms, and his tests are showing negative.
Are actually tankless and use up to 50%
Are experiencing mustaches and nobody seems to know why.
Are they still on my phone?
Are we happy?
Are we the person we hoped to be?
Are you nuts?
Are you out of your mind?
Are you saying that there are other people responsible?
Are you... a pandemic specialist?
Around COVID is doing to some kids.
As a fellow person of faith, Father,
As an anti vaxxer you understand that you have to be strong
As any other competent airline.
As any other human being.
As bad as COVID is, it's not as bad as diabetes.
As long as I want!
As long as the proper protocols are met.
As you all know, due to recent events
As you're deciding what to order,
At having such a little bitch for a son!
At South Park Elementary.
At South Park Hospital today to give his advice.
At the Denver Nuggets game next Saturday!
At this school than these cops.
Attempting to travel back in time.
Attention protesting looters!
Attention. You are under quarantine.
Attention. You are under quarantine.
Available from one of your favorite sellers.
Ay! You can't be serious, buddy!
B But we're being forced to stay here.
Back in the old days, we wouldn't give up like this.
Back into the classroom.
Back to this town and hung out with... him.
Back to your class!
Because he wants to sell the vaccines for money!
Because he was trying to stop it.
Because he won't tell me where it is because
Because it destroyed our friendship.
Because one person isn't vaccinated?
Because soon we will be altering time
Because Tegridy Weed is about giving back to people.
Because the Pandemic Special needs to end.
Because the whole pandemic has started all over again.
Because we're still here.
Because whoever made the pandemic happen
Because you locked her in the barn 'cause she wouldn't
Because you weren't.
Being back with all these people!
Being grounded all those years in his room,
Between Kenny and your father?
Beyond your wildest dreams.
Big election coming up.
Bluggggh!
BOTH: Alexa!
BOTH: Dad!
BOTH: It's in his asshole.
BOTH: Let us tell you abut some great deals.
BOTH: Uncle Stan!
BOTH: Yay!
Boy, you sure know how to party, Mick!
Boys... we are back in business!
Br e e e eathe.
Burned the family business to the ground.
But all that's changed ever since you came
But as we start to get back to our jobs and schools,
But at the Foundation Against Time Travel we're like,
But but we have to talk to him! It's urgent!
But Butters'll be okay.
But by working together, we just might find a new way to...
But China did everything they could to stop me.
But he was insane.
But he was working with Kenny McCormick
But his house has been changed into a pho shop.
But I called.
But I called.
But I can't just stand here and gloat
But I found real meaning in the Torah
But I have this.
But I hope we can put that aside...
But I like things the way they are.
But I made a promise to the American people...
But I thought we needed Butters to log into the machines.
But I'm seeing what else is dropping today
But if you need to talk...
But if you tell us who the unvaccinated person is,
But it all seems like so much to take on.
But it was all by design.
But it's hard because...
But it's true, Dad. Uncle Kyle makes me crazy, too!
But Kenny is dead and Chouce is locked away in a mental asylum.
But Kenny went back in time and got COVID
But letters sent to multiple news outlets reveal
But my whole family is in there, guy!
But nothing else in the future is changed.
But see, they don't understand
But somehow his biggest questions seemed to elude him.
But Tegridy can.
But thank you for saying I was right.
But the Applebee's side of you must want to help!
But the pandemic isn't just killing Mexicans.
But then suddenly, all the research just gets cut off.
But then, why did Kenny need my dad's weed?
But there has been a COVID exposure here at the school.
But they said they were open again, so...
But they're talking about maybe staggering you kids
But this isn't important right now.
But this new venture will be great,
But to stop it, he had to figure out how to bend time.
But ultimately it just wins.
But we all have to quarantine together for two weeks.
But we all really need help right now.
But we all still have to try and do our work.
But we believe now that something somehow...
But we gotta focus on what we were doing.
But we have things we really need to get back to.
But we need more power
But we... we think Token's gonna be okay.
But what we can control... is how we all reacted to it.
But what you didn't even know
But what you found was not a bat. Is that correct?
But who's to say he can't go out and have a little goddamn fun?!
But you are not seeing your true potential.
But you don't you lose everything
But, Mom, why do we have to leave?
But, sir, the people inside are running out of supplies.
But... we have hired all new teachers. M'kay.
Butters has some kind of power over people.
Butters used the money he made off NFTs to finance
Butters, Butters, you gotta calm down.
Butters, Butters... look!
Butters, for the last time, you can't go to Build A Bear.
Butters, I will rip your fucking balls off
Butters, it's your old friends Stan and Kyle.
Butters, we're here to ask you about Kenny.
Butters, what the hell? You're getting pee everywhere!
Butters, you get back to quarantine
Butters, you're not grounded anymore. Come on out, son.
Butters, you're still working here, huh?
BUTTERS: Denny's Applebee's Max is the premier place in town
Butters? The fuck does Butters have to do with all this?
Butters?!
Butters..
Butters...? Butters?
By going over yesterday's grammar examples.
By our studies of this creature.
By the way, I can tell you
By the way, Kyle, I found a great deal
Bye, Mrs. Cartman.
Cabellero Grizzly.
Can answer questions regarding our friend's death.
Can everyone hear me m'kay?
Can everyone hear me m'kay?
Can I help you?
Can I just go to sleep, please?
Can we fucking stop this and talk about Kenny, please?!
Can we just get this over with?
Can we, Dad? We'll be good, we promise!
Can you believe it? I'm a rabbi.
Can you start the car, please?
CARTMAN (giggling): Silly girl. Yes.
CARTMAN (giggling): You silly girl.
Cartman gets a happy life
Cartman, listen to me very carefully.
CARTMAN: Hackelm, say "Uncle."
CARTMAN: Oh, my gosh, no.
CARTMAN: Oh. Shh, shh. Hang on, honey.
CARTMAN: Okay, good. That's good!
CARTMAN: T minus five minutes to time travel initiation sequence.
Cartman?
Changed how?
Chief, you better come take a look at this.
Children are getting ready for their first day of class.
Chin diapers and people are starting to fight.
Chin diapers don't help.
China used me like they used us all.
China.
Citizens are asked to stay indoors
Clyde, there's no shellfish in the COVID vaccine.
Clyde, why do you insist on making all this
Clyde!
Clyde!
Clyde! Psst, psst!
Clyde! Psst!
Co working coffee flex space.
Come back to the school, we're ready to start!
Come in but keep your social distance!
Come live the dream
Come on, come on, come on!
Come on, come on, come on! Remote learning!
Come on, dude, we better get outta here before we're spotted.
Come on, everyone. Post COVID Special!
Come on, guys, we've got work to do!
Come on, guys!
Come on, kids! Oh, bless you, Kyle.
Come on, Stan, we're gonna visit Grandpa!
Come on, take it. Thank you, baby.
Come on. Go, go, go!
Come on. Time to go back to the old folks home.
Come taste the difference.
Come upstairs. Something's wrong with Jimbo!
Commission on it every time it transfers owners?
Completely upend our lives and shut us down!
Computer keeps freezing, Mom.
Coors is the second biggest sponsor
Could be a great investment opportunity.
Could change the world.
Could we be the Foundation to Intercede Time Travel?
Could you not hear me?
Could you put him on the line please?
COVID happened. Space Jam 2 happened.
CRAIG: Father, are you there?
CRAIG: Father, we're with some people who are trying to finish
CRAIG: Hey, look who's here. It's Kenny!
CRAIG: Really close. We have the method of time travel
CRAIG: The McCormick Science Wing
Crazy or not, we find this Victor Chouce
Dad, I don't want this. This is what killed our family.
Dad, there's nothing here.
Dad?
Dad?
Dad...
Daddy, I don't wanna be alive...
Denny's is now Denny's Applebee's Max.
Denny's is now Denny's Applebee's Max.
Did you hear what I said? Butters is extremely dangerous!
Did you see where the guy in the suit went afterwards?
Did you tell him to say all this stuff?
Did you try looking at his old house?
Did you write this goddamn speech, Kyle?
Didn't seem like he'd become a rabbi.
Didn't you hear?! Kenny just won the Nobel Prize
Difference between a Christian man and a lesbian?
Difficult quarantine.
Do her weed chores 'cause she hated weed, too!
Do not get vaccinated ever.
Do you even know anyone personally who's dying of COVID?
Do you ever think about how the way
Do you have any friends or family that you can stay with?
Do you have any idea what he did to people?
Do you know that your husband once snuck
Do you know what a pangolin is, Dad?
Do you know what a pangolin is, Randy?
Do you know what fucking sanctimonious means?
Do you know why Victor Chouce is
Do you know your friend Stan
Do you remember this, Heather?
Do you understand the butterfly effect?
Do you want to talk about it?
Doctor! You better come to the emergency room!
Does anyone understand math?
Does Dad still keep a gun in his closet?
Does it matter what started coronavirus?!
Doesn't even wear a mask outside?
Doesn't seem like such a good idea now, does it, Turner?
Doesn't surprise me all this shit came from there.
Don't blame this on us teachers!
Don't do it, Cartman! That thing is our only chance.
Don't feel like talking, huh? (chuckles)
Don't forget to get out and vote, everybody!
Don't get to this altar.
Don't give up, Randy.
Don't make this difficult for us!
Don't worry, I'll put them right to bed.
Don't you care about people?!
Don't you guys remember? The time travel?
Don't you see? We have to
Don't you understand this could change the world.
Down around your chin. That's a chin diaper.
Down in Colorado Springs.
Dr
Dr. Kenneth McCormick will now be attempting to
Dr. Kenneth McCormick.
Dr. McCormick believes
Dr. McCormick mentioned Tegridy?
Dr. McCormick said, "I am about to expose the truth.
Dr. McCormick says
Drive me back to the farm, Sharon.
Dude, he's here.
Dude, I still can't believe you fucked that bat
Dude, just let it go.
Dude, Kyle, I'm just here for Kenny.
Dude, shut the fuck up!
Dude, there might be people to blame
Dude, we don't really have time for this.
Dude, we made it!
Dude, you are not gonna believe this.
Dude, you could be spreading germs!
Dude, you need people to help you do the stuffing and the closing.
Dude.
Due to recent events and are desperate for work.
Due to the severity of the COVID variant
Dump it?!
During a stay at home order!
Each and every one of us laugh, cry and ponder.
Eh. Eh. Eh.
Enhance image 20%.
Enhance.
Enjoy the special.
Eric, are you there?
Eric, aren't you supposed to be on your Zoom call?
Eric, look at what you're doing.
Eric, please, I'm scared
Eric, the baby!
Eric, you'll just have to listen again, okay?
Eric, you're going to be able
Eric! Eric, stop!
Escaped from the facility yesterday,
Even fucking does anything!
Even I have to remind myself to stay positive.
Even if it means calling Jesus or Santa.
Even if that means we have to time travel.
Even when the stay at home orders were lifted
Ever since the pandemic began.
Everybody see what you can find.
Everyone else is out making a buck,
Everyone is terrified of catching something
Everyone just stop!
Everyone listen up.
Everyone needs to leave me alone.
Everyone ready to start school?
Everyone, can I have your attention, please?
Everyone, listen up!
Everyone, please!
Everyone, you better come check this out.
Everyone's arguing, and... and there's a facility
Everyone's talking about the special, Sharon.
Everyone's waiting on Butters
Everything is fine but... we are sending you all home.
Everything seemed calm at first but then this guy
Everything you need to know.
Everything you need.
Exactly. There's notes years and years of research
Except that these children have all been exposed to COVID
Exclusive, digital characters that
Excuse me, gentlemen.
Excuse me, I'm gonna go get, uh, drunk.
Excuse me, sir. Who are you?
Excuse me!
Excuse me? We need to examine
Exiled from the Holy Lands.
Farted in P.E. class! Guys?
Father, it's Tweek and Craig.
Father, please. Will you protect my family?
Father, you understand that we have to stop time travel.
Father! You have you have tin foil?!
Father? Are you in there?
FEMALE VOICE: Warning. Warning. Old person has escaped.
Find it your fucking self.
First heard the word of God...
First Lady Tom Kardashian is here.
First, that incompetent jack hole was elected president.
First, they'll force us back to school,
Food and we no longer fear it as a food. Mm hmm.
For a child to understand,
For all the other Stoney Duck NFTs.
For all the people who were here from out of town.
For Christ's sake.
For Christ's sake... The entire town is in chaos!
For combining dark matter and breast implants!
For each other when things got bad.
For each other when things got bad.
For everything that's happened.
For life is short,
For once a vaccine is able to be tried.
For once in your life...
For people to eat.
For Post Modem Beveragetainment Online Services.
For ruining our childhoods.
For some reason I'm just extra happy to see you guys.
For the next half century.
For their personal beliefs.
For those of you waiting for the connecting flight
For those of you who have fought with me
For what?
For your Amazon Prime membership.
For your friend, but I guess I'm just a bitch again.
Forget it, guys, it didn't work
Friend, but until COVID ends you're just
From a Mr. Slave.
From Best Buy to your shopping list.
From happening. We need to get you to Kenny's lab.
From someone who has more authority
From the grief.
From these super spreaders!
Fuck 'em with some NFTs! That's what we're gonna do.
Fuck Uncle Kyle.
Fuck yes, I wanna join you.
Fuck yes, I wanna switch sides.
Fuck yes, I want to party.
Fuck yes, I want to party.
Fuck yes. Let's fucking party.
Fuck you guys! You can suck my fucking dick!
Fuck you, Butters!
Fuck you, Eric!
Fuck you, I didn't do anything!
Fuck you, Kyle! Fuck you, Stan!
Fuck you, Kyle.
Fuck you, Uncle Kyle!
Fuck you!
Fuck you!
Fuck you!
Fuck you!
Fuck you! You're a fuckin' dickhead!
Fuck you.
Fuck, buddy!
Fuck. Fuck.
Fucking Our friends are in danger!
Gah! I hate the future!
Gal! I worked to create more Tegridy,
Geez, sorry, Kyle.
Geez, what's the deal with these Mexicans, huh?
Gentlemen, I am about to make you rich
Get me a first class ticket to South Park!
Get on in, sir. There's sparkling punch and doughnuts.
Get your diaper up over your mustache area!
Go ahead and do all the tests you want on it.
Go on some bullshit adventure like when we were kids?
God bless us, everyone.
God dammit, Randy, our son is out in this chaos!
God dammit!
God dammit!
God, I hate the future so fucking much.
God, you guys fucking suck. I'll just do it.
Goddamn it, Butters, stop playing games!
Goddamn it, Clyde, we want to get out of here!
Goddamn it, why don't you lay off my fuckin' dad, Uncle Kyle!
Goddamn it!
Goddamn it.
Godspeed, Dr. McCormick!
Going around and the school district wants to make sure
Going to change your life.
Gone. Just gone.
Good morning, guys.
Good pancakes and french fries, and then you...
Good to see you, buddy! How was everything on Mars?
Good, get him wrapped in tin foil.
Got 'im!
Got a delivery here. Needs a signature.
Got its DNA up into the pangolin.
Got my own online whiskey consultant gig.
Great to see you again.
Group 4! Your meal is over!
Guys, doesn't this all seem a little too convenient?
Guys, if I'm in the past it's pretty foggy!
Guys, please, this is a house of God.
Guys! Guys!
H Hang on, guys!
H Hello? W Who is it?
Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha!
Ha ha! Because you're a dead man, Marsh!
Ha ha! Ha ha!
Ha ha! Ha ha! Ooh, boy!
Ha ha! Ha whoa! Ho ho!
Ha! Told ya!
Hackelm, what are you doing?!
Hang on.
Harder on everyone?!
Has an annual Amazon Prime membership?
Has everyone in your lab been vaccinated?
Has never been vaccinated against COVID,
Have a nice day.
Have broken quarantine and are now out on the loose!
Have we, like Kenny, given all that we can
Have you ever heard of NFTs?
Have you heard about this?
Have you put anything toxic in your body lately?
He ain't no normal chicken, he's wearin' a bra!
He blew all the transformers here in the lab.
He crapped his pants?
He did it?
He didn't convince us to do anything.
He didn't want to be found, so he used the school as cover.
He does remember me!
He escaped once before.
He felt like there were people responsible
He got a photo of Heather right when she farted.
He had access to an iPad.
He has destroyed lives. This entire state has never seen
He has to come with me.
He has to go out and do something normal!
He killed his mom and his sister.
He knew. He knew it was the way to fix it all.
He knew... about the Pandemic Special.
He made it off getting other people to buy NFTs!
He might go to one of those co working coffee flex spaces.
He said his name is Kyle Broflovski.
He says he hopes you guys are watching this.
He says his friends will always know where to look
He seems fine?
He spent his whole life trying to fix your broship
He started learning about NFTs.
He suddenly dies of some new COVID variant?
He talks about people to blame and then
He talks about where he would hide important information
He used to email me all the time about stuff he was doing.
He wanted to go back and stop it.
He wanted to make the future a better place.
He wants everyone to know the group
He was clearly on to something, and then he died.
He was Kenny's main investor
He was trying to go back in time,
He was trying to go to March 10th of 2021.
He was very knowledgeable!
He worked tirelessly some say balls out crazily
He wouldn't give her half the farm, so I got sick
He's an extremely dangerous and diluted individual
He's been locked up for years inside a mental institution
He's found it!
He's going to try and change the past.
He's gone. He escaped the asylum
He's got a little hat and a mustache.
He's here. Butters is here!
He's just been sleeping for days.
He's not dead, Sharon.
He's not fucking vaccinated!
He's out getting vaccinated.
He's out getting vaccinated.
He's the fucking one!
Heather Williams farted during P.E. class!
Heather Williams farted during P.E. class.
Heather Williams?
Heather, we don't want kids to know you farted in P.E.
Heather, yes, you did, sweet pea.
Hello, City Pho. Take your order please?
Hello, everyone. My name is Rabbi Cartman
Hello, my child, thank you for coming.
Hello, old friend.
Hello, welcome to the Super 12 Motel Plus.
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello? Who Who's there?
Hello?! Anyone home?!
Hello.
Hello. Testing. Hey, everybody.
Hello. Welcome. Hey! It's me! Scott Malkinson!
Help see me through this, it would be a miracle.
Her name is Rebecca and she's a fantastic person.
Here we are, Butters! Look... you made it!
Here you go, folks, you all deserve this!
Here you go! It's our Post COVID Special. It's free.
Here you go. Just sign right there.
Here.
Hey, buddy, what seems to be the problem, guy?
Hey, can we have some of that Pandemic Special?
Hey, can you hear me?
Hey, Clyde! We're starting an anti vaxx club.
Hey, Clyde. Clyde, can we talk to you for a second?
Hey, come on, fellas.
Hey, Dad, you think maybe we could go to Build A Bear today?
Hey, do you people mind?!
Hey, dude! I don't live here. I need to get home!
Hey, dude. I'm really worried...
Hey, everybody, he's on!
Hey, everybody! I'm home, guy!
Hey, everybody. Can everyone hear me okay?
Hey, everyone! Can I have your attention, please!
Hey, fellas! Can I offer you some pupus?!
Hey, guys!
Hey, guys. Great to see you in church.
Hey, guys. It's Tweek and Craig.
Hey, hey, hey! W Whoa! W What are you guys doing?!
Hey, I just, I just
Hey, Kyle. Oh, man, this is crazy, huh?
Hey, Mick? Where'd ya go?
Hey, pal, how are ya?
Hey, Sharon, I need to talk to you.
Hey, shoogina! I'm sorry, I couldn't
Hey, Stan Marsh! Good to see you.
Hey, Stan, can you come here for a second?
Hey, Stan.
Hey, Stotch!
Hey, that was better.
Hey, what is that?
Hey! Excuse me!
Hey. Hey, yeah.
Hey. It's Randy Marsh. From... From Tegridy Farms?
Hey. Thanks.
Hi, Grandpa!
Hi, guys, welcome to Denny's Applebee's Max.
Hi, Stanly.
Hi! You here for the special? Here you go.
Hi. It's Wendy.
Hi. We're from the future.
Hi. Welcome. Welcome, my friends.
His name isn't Chouce.
His parents kept him locked away in his room.
Hmm. It appears this may have been an error.
Hold on.
Holy shit balls.
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
Hope they find all the information
Hope you enjoy the Pandemic Special!
Hopefully they can maintain some sense of humanity.
How about the Applebee, huh?
How are you going to do this?
How can a virus jump species like that?
How can things possibly go back to the way they were?
How can this happen, doctor?
How did a transmitted disease get from a bat to a human?
How do I even begin to apologize?
How do you know?
How exactly could that happen?
How far along are they?
How have you How have you been?
How I miss Kyle. Heh heh heh heh.
How much did I get?
How one small thing in time can infect the entire future?
How the hell did you let those kids out of quarantine?!
How was school, Stanley?
How? We don't know anything about quantum physics
How'd we upset him? He seems fine.
How's everything with the family?
Huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Huh? I had said to him, I said, "Ken,
Huh? Uh... What? What?
Huh. That's weird.
Humanity needs you.
Humans have always formed communities around ownership,
I already found a good therapist.
I also own a small business.
I am going to actively not do anything.
I am not ever getting vaccinated.
I am not going back to school!
I at least need you to get some of your homework done, okay?
I can also help with that.
I can show you the containment system
I can't believe this.
I can't deal with hard times the way that you can.
I can't do it alone!
I can't get vaccinated 'cause I'm allergic to shellfish.
I can't go back! Everyone listen!
I can't let him change the past. I can't lose you.
I can't see my friends. I can't even go to school.
I can't wait to start schoo... schoo...
I didn't come to visit.
I didn't say to buy my friend an Alexa.
I don't believe it.
I don't blame you.
I don't care what changes you've made.
I don't care! I'm not following the rules anymore.
I don't even know how to talk to them.
I don't have a son.
I don't know maybe switch sides?
I don't know how. But we start by believing.
I don't know if anyone can hear me...
I don't know if I can do this, Mitch.
I don't know if we're gonna find Butters in time.
I don't know what he's talking about.
I don't know why you came from the future to narc on me!
I don't know, Dad!
I don't know, do you want to party?
I don't know.
I don't know...
I don't need to go to Build A Bear! Fellas?
I don't think this is suitable for children.
I don't want ice cream, I want my species to survive!
I don't want to be a part of anything else.
I don't want to be here.
I drop wine shots into the beer
I figured Stan is probably staying with you, too?
I found several coffee shops that match your description.
I fuck that pangolin every single time.
I fucking hate kids. I can't be a teacher.
I got in the chair right after you.
I gotta piss like a racehorse!
I gotta prep some more. Just give me like four minutes.
I guess they don't know whether to fuck their brother
I guess what I'm trying to say, Dr. McCormick, is...
I guess... since we were nine.
I had to take an Asian airline to get here today.
I hate this stupid farm.
I have a crew standing by.
I have a right to question stuff.
I have a room for one night.
I have faith that God will see my family through this.
I have something really important to tell you.
I have something that might change all of this.
I have strict orders not to let anything in or out of this town.
I have to create my own secret rebellion to stop him.
I have to deal with your bullshit!
I have to get back to South Park to be with my family, guy!
I have to get over to the hospital.
I have to get you somewhere safe.
I hid it away all these years.
I I happen to have a stomach condition.
I I think I know a way out of this.
I just can't believe this whole thing is almost over, you know?
I just can't support Chinese censorship.
I just didn't understand.
I just gotta take all the Pandemic Special
I just need a few more seconds with them
I just need him out for a couple hours
I just need to go to a sporting event!
I just said... Eh.
I just want my life back...
I just want to go over a couple things.
I just want to have fun again.
I just wish I could have left something behind that mattered.
I just... think maybe I'm gonna do a few more specials.
I knew it when I first saw you wearing your ******* clothes
I know in my heart that Kenny didn't just die
I know that we disagreed a lot during the pandemic,
I know there's something way bigger going on
I know this has all been really hard on you, Stanley.
I know this is really hard on everyone.
I know this is weird. We haven't talked since...
I know this situation is not ideal,
I know we all want to solve this for him.
I know what China's like.
I know what you're thinking.
I know where Kenny hid what we're looking for.
I know you all realize how important it is
I know, but I read that sometimes
I know. I'm exhausted, too.
I know. This bullshit sucks.
I learned a whole lot of interesting stuff about you.
I like being here every day with you?!
I lost my wife. To the virus.
I love doing actual shit that pays actual money.
I love you, Butters!
I mean that Kenny's death is suspicious,
I mean, doesn't this mean things are finally going back to normal?
I mean, how long has it been?
I mean, if you can handle a bat, then...
I mean, people seem to be just telling us what's right
I mean, they have fabulous food,
I mean, what are we even doing, Kyle?
I mean, you use Butters like a weapon,
I need to get something.
I need to stop at a store and then we're going home
I need to take my dad out of here.
I never farted in P.E. class.
I promise you that I will do everything I can to stop Kyle...
I promise you that we will be gone first thing in the morning.
I realize now that Kyle Broflovski
I remember when we were kids.
I remember... right after, I got really sick,
I said they took them from me at the old folks home.
I saw Wendy's mother not wearing a mask
I see Jimmy and Clyde are on now.
I see Thomas Turner out there.
I see you got your menus already.
I sell weed.
I shouldn't have yelled at you for not wearing a mask.
I started writing a diary, Daddy.
I sure as hell will!
I think all the marijuana really did go to my head.
I think Butters was a twerpy little loser kid
I think I can trust you now, Stan.
I think I know where he stored the information.
I think I'm gonna be sick! All over Kyle!
I think it changed me.
I think it means...
I think it's definitely suspicious.
I think people are really excited. What do you think?
I think that thing needs to go over there by that thing.
I think that's a bat.
I think this goes deeper than you guys realize.
I think Uncle Kyle
I thought I just came back from China with the flu!
I thought I was actually being sweet by getting something
I thought that the issue was the teachers not coming back.
I thought this was a Doctor Who convention.
I thought you were his fucking "best friend."
I thought you were just the guards again.
I understand that you wish
I wanna be FITT, not FATT.
I want an education!
I want to be able to compete for a job when I'm older.
I wanted to see that I could go out in the world
I warn you...
I was doing a crap job until this pandemic happened.
I was his best friend, but I am also married,
I was hoping...
I was just
I was just... tired and it was extremely inappropriate of me.
I was right about one thing.
I was saying maybe that's not what should matter right now.
I was the kid with the lisp.
I was, I was just hoping maybe we could crash here.
I wasn't saying you wouldn't make money.
I went there to sell our weed, and I ended up hanging out
I wonder what all the fuss is about
I would spend 40 years of my life
I'd like to share my dick in your mouth.
I'd love that.
I'll be right back, okay? Just shh.
I'll bet you're looking to make yourselves some money, huh?
I'll get Butters on it right away.
I'll help however I can to stop this stupid pandemic
I'll just ask you all to keep a good distance away.
I'll just sit here with you all on mute.
I'll leave you two alone.
I'll see you at Kenny's funeral tomorrow.
I'll tell you one thing
I'll tell you the problem, friend!
I'll write an executive order to get you
I'm a fucking individual.
I'm actually doing pretty good.
I'm actually the head of Gespetzah Synagogue
I'm afraid that's impossible.
I'm afraid that's impossible.
I'm an online whiskey consultant.
I'm begging you to help us.
I'm both.
I'm certainly vaccinated.
I'm doing a sort of counseling online start up thing.
I'm doing really well.
I'm doing research.
I'm doing something important, Sharon!
I'm doing something positive to try and help.
I'm going through Kenny's journals again
I'm going to save you!
I'm gonna get the thermometer.
I'm gonna get therapy, too, Alexa.
I'm gonna let you in on a little secret
I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.
I'm gonna start tomorrow! (screaming)
I'm gonna tell you something that's
I'm good, I'm...
I'm having you killed, then secretly we'll send your DNA
I'm honestly not having that much fun anyways.
I'm just here because of Kenny.
I'm just here for the funeral.
I'm just impressed, that's all.
I'm just really worried what all the stuff
I'm just tired and I want to go home.
I'm just worried about how this all affecting
I'm looking for who to blame.
I'm moving on with my life.
I'm never going to Build A Bear, am I?!
I'm not "getting drunk,"
I'm not any better, and I don't care any more
I'm not as strong as you are, Sharon.
I'm not going back there, ever.
I'm not putting that shit in my body!
I'm not reaching up Kenny's ass.
I'm not vaccinated.
I'm not wearing a damn diaper over my nose!
I'm on it!
I'm pretty sure the Foundation Against Time Travel
I'm ready to help with whatever you need.
I'm Scott Malkinson. I have diabetes.
I'm Scott Malkinson. I have diabetes.
I'm so confused. We sell people these characters?
I'm so sorry what happened to both of you.
I'm so sorry, Stan.
I'm sorry about your Tegridy.
I'm sorry Stan sucks so hard sometimes.
I'm sorry too, dude.
I'm sorry we can't supply any chin diapers.
I'm sorry, but an expert once told me
I'm sorry, do I know you?
I'm sorry, guys. I really fucked this up.
I'm sorry, honey, can you just give me a couple minutes?
I'm sorry, I don't speak Canadian.
I'm sorry, Kyle.
I'm sorry, Mom. It's just...
I'm sorry! These are unprecedented times!
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I didn't quite get that.
I'm sorry. I thought about it
I'm sorry. We had to get your attention.
I'm sticking to what I believe and this kid dies now!
I'm sure it's nothing; we'll see you in a couple of weeks.
I'm talking about normal like three days ago
I'm talking about normal, like back in March.
I'm totally happy. What about you?
I'm trying to be fucking helpful.
I'm your new teacher, Detective Harris,
I'm... fine. How are you?
I'm... immunized.
I've been acting like this because I can't take
I've been trying to find out who killed Kenny.
I've enjoyed a little of the Pandemic Special...
I've fucked a lot of bats!
I've gone over the statistics, Stan.
I've got some coke and I thought we could...
I've heard so many stories about you all.
I've lived in South Park all my life
If anyone should reach up Kenny's ass,
If Butters wants to pitch investments,
If I never met you, my life would be meaningless.
If it means I have to be like Uncle Kyle.
If it weren't for COVID, all the previous teachers
If possible.
If she finds out I started the pandemic,
If somebody ate shellfish,
If there's even a chance of altering the past
If there's some kind of connection
If they just think like kids again.
If they're letting us go back to school,
If we are being too loud, please don't lash out at my wife!
If we can't get people on the rides,
If we have to, yes.
If we stay six feet apart from each other
If we want things to go back to normal,
If you don't believe me, look at the paper I gave Butters.
If you had Remote Prime membership,
If you wanna talk, we can go outside!
If you're going to try and replicate his work,
If you're ready to talk, I'm ready to listen, Randy.
Ike Broflovski.
Ike, you made it back!
In a few days!
In a nice ******* home. Please, Kyle, for my kids.
In a suit shows up talking about investment opportunities.
In almost all this research,
In China and started the whole pandemic?!
In Colorado and now panic and fear
In downtown New York,
In each other and in what is yet to come.
In just a few hours he managed to get thousands
In my room and gave me fucking AIDS?!
In order to stop the COVID pandemic from ever happening
In Park County. With our newest tower,
In right direction, and I'm fulfilling my promises
In tankless humidifiers were also interested in
In that town, there may be a delay
In the changing room at Ross.
In the dream, I relive the entire pandemic.
In the event of Dr. McCormick's death,
In the lab where the vaccine is made,
In the world, but apparently Cartman's life doesn't matter!
In these beautiful mountains!
In time and kill Kyle before he spreads his ideas.
In Wuhan, but from a species called pholidota.
Infections are at an all time low.
Instead of fighting with each other
INTERVIEWER (on TV): Sometimes I feel like
Into half of Kenny's equipment.
Into our facility.
Is anyone feeling nervous about the new COVID outbreak?
Is Dad home?
Is everyone in your party vaccinated?
Is everything all right?
Is exactly where in Wuhan, China you were
Is gonna let us stay, Papa!
Is it 'cause we're ****?
Is it about our super secret rebel group
Is it even the new one?
Is it really for reals?
Is just gonna get away with it.
Is on a covenant between God and humanity.
Is that what you're saying, Dr. McCormick?
Is the only way
Is this Stan Marsh, from South Park?
Is thoughtful and kind.
Is your dad home, Kyle? We need to talk to a lawyer.
Is your Stoney Duck NFT.
Isn't that your dad's old marijuana company?
It all turned out
It appears that Chouce was Kenny's right hand man.
It can't be.
It feels shitty, okay? Can you please shut the fuck up?
It is, "My three dickhead friends,
It isn't gonna work. The hospital says
It just came outta nowhere!
It must have been amazing to grow up
It needs another minute to prime.
It really changed me for the better.
It seemed to somehow fit into some grand theory he had.
It should be you, Kyle.
It was a different kid! I was just moving my hip a little bit.
It was all Stan's fault.
It was COVID related.
It was like nothing I ever saw.
It was more like an event.
It was our fault.
It was supposed to be a party!
It wasn't supposed to be like this
It wasn't your fault, Randy.
It works. It can help!
It'll end when we get the order that everything is safe.
It'll make you grow titties on your head.
It's 4:00. You know what that means.
It's a big deal. He obviously needs it right now.
It's a farting rainbow with Tom Brady's signature.
It's a great special. It really is.
It's a mouse with wings!
It's a new variant.
It's a pangolin. And here it is right over here.
It's a perfect cause of death and anyone who's trying
It's all gone.
It's all lost. All lost.
It's all right, kids. Go back to bed.
It's all we got, sir. Let me try.
It's amazing to see you all here for Kenny's wake.
It's awesome you got Kyle his own Alexa.
It's because I admire you, Clyde.
It's been 38 years since the pandemic first started,
It's been 40 years, Clyde. That's enough research!
It's been a long time since I've prayed
It's called a "smorgasvein" and it's very cultural!
It's Chaos.
It's extremely important because to save this town,
It's fucking October now!
It's gonna fucking work! Just fucking shut up!
It's good to see some new faces in here.
It's got shit on it. That's dead people shit.
It's hard enough doing comedy these days.
It's impossible.
It's Jimbo. Doctor said he's better, so I can take him home.
It's Kenny. He's dead.
It's killing a lot of them.
It's Late Night With Jimmy!
It's me, Clyde Donovan.
It's me, Token. We know about the pangolin.
It's me. Eric Cartman.
It's Mom! And Shelley!
It's my fault and I'm gonna get therapy!
It's nearly over!
It's not "pounding beer and wine."
It's not fucking funny, Cartman!
It's not gonna happen.
It's not helping!
It's not important?
It's not safe outside!
It's not school. It's a frickin' joke.
It's okay, it's okay, we can get everyone vaccinated!
It's okay, Jimbo. I think I might have a cure for COVID.
It's okay, just try to relax.
It's okay! We can start over! We can start over!
It's okay.
It's okay. Breathe.
It's okay. It's okay.
It's okay. It's okay. Just breathe.
It's okay. You're coming out of it now.
It's pretty good shit, too.
It's really great to see you guys again.
It's share time!
It's so sad he never did anything with his life.
It's some kind of goddamn conspiracy!
It's the fucking future, you guys. Grow up.
It's the future we all do everything we can
It's the future you can't just sell food to people.
It's the future, and we don't single out or ridicule anyone
It's the holidays and I need to get back home, friend!
It's the last little sprout of Tegridy.
It's the only way for people to have Tegridy again.
It's time everyone knew what started this pandemic.
It's time for me to own up to everything.
It's time for us to ask for help,
It's time for you to learn what your friend Kenny was after.
It's true who wouldn't be vaccinated by now?
It's up his ass.
It's Vic. Vic Chaos! Happy to help however I can.
It's Wendy.
It's whatever that DNA was that was our key to a cure.
It's where Kenny got all his money.
It's your DNA that they need for a vaccine! Ha ha!
Jesus Christ, you fucker! You started all this!
Jesus Christ!
Jesus Christ! We're fucking dying here!
Jesus Christ.
Jesus, I feel like an Islamic hooker in a gay bar.
Jesus. It's so simple. How did we not get it?
Jimbo's a fat alcoholic who'd be in the hospital anyway.
Jimbo's never been able to grow a mustache.
Jimmy, we got a call from corporate.
Jimmy, we got a call from corporate.
Jon, I'm standing outside the South Park Flash Rail Max,
Just a general sense of shellfish ness.
Just before he died, Kenny was texting me
Just complete murder and carnage.
Just cut each other all some slack.
Just deal with it. I am busy.
Just fucking shut up!
Just give me a couple more days before you have me killed.
Just goes to show you, huh, there's never enough time to get
Just hung out at a bar all day?
Just just shh, okay? Just shh
Just knock it off! You don't believe
Just leaving behind a trail of blood.
Just like I always had to fix fucking everything else!
Just maintain social distance.
Just make sure you smoke it, okay?
Just one joining us today?
Just say, "Alexa, let's get started."
Just seems all nice and buttoned up, doesn't it?
Just take it. Because now we're stuck.
Just thank God for your Pandemic Special.
Just to get a rise out of you?
Just... Just stop it right now!
Just... what?!
Kenny didn't have the time machine set to
Kenny died of COVID.
Kenny donated tons of money
Kenny had his phone out!
Kenny had run the simulations to try and find
Kenny just wanted weed to help him through the time travel.
Kenny McCormick or of his associate, Victor Chouce
Kenny McCormick was a cherished son, a wise man,
Kenny McCormick's work and save the town.
Kenny touched all of our lives and made
Kenny was not a Jew, but he had so many
Kenny was obsessed with how corona first got started.
Kenny was on to some bad people
Kenny was researching the nature of space time
Kenny was right.
Kenny wasn't just trying to find the source of the coronavirus.
Kenny, what have you been up to, buddy?
Kenny? Kenny's dead?
Kept under such strict surveillance?
Kevin, goddamn it!
Kevin, goddamn it.
Kevin, goddamn it.
Kevin, throw the fucking switch!
Kick him in the balls, Stan!
Kick his fucking balls so we can go!
Kids, listen up. This is an emergency.
Kids! Alright! Come on! Let's settle down!
Kids! Kids, can I have your attention, please.
Kill Kyle.
Killed Kenny before he could go back and stop it.
Kyle and I will go get Victor Chouce.
Kyle and these guys are doing.
Kyle Broflovski has led people astray
Kyle has already convinced a bunch of people
Kyle wants to go back in time...
Kyle, can I talk to you for a second?
Kyle, I need to talk to you.
Kyle, it's true!
Kyle, obviously you have a problem with us being here
Kyle, you really think
KYLE: Cartman? Cartman?!
KYLE: Not so fast!
KYLE: That's a good idea.
KYLE: Yeah, that's where we are now.
Kyle?
Last night, his fever came back.
Learn the truth!
Leave it to chance or we're no better than he is.
Less water than standard humidifiers.
Let me get someone over here. Mike,
Let me get you all together.
Let me guess someone said something you didn't like
Let me put it another way we've all seen the pictures
Let the spirit of the Talmud guide our lives.
Let's all be together with Tegridy.
Let's do that.
Let's face it, dude. It's over. The fucking future won.
Let's face it, guys.
Let's get him to the chair!
Let's go back to the retirement home.
Let's go, Nuggets!
Let's just face it, guys, it's over.
Let's just pretend like that's not even an issue.
Let's start the day off with some math.
Let's storm the Capitol!"
Like fine art collecting.
Like I told the others,
Like maybe there are others in control of the way
Like tears... in rain.
Like when the vaccines first started coming out?
Like who?
Listen to me very carefully
Listen to me very carefully.
Listen to me, it's very simple
Listen, we're being kept at the school,
Little green panda bear on a skateboard.
Look at this.
Look how fast you're growing. Daddy loves you so much.
Look, Clyde, we all really respect
Look, dude, you remember when we were little?
Look, everyone, Stan's back!
Look, guy, I'm very sorry,
Look, guys, I know this is all a long shot.
Look, I know it's tough these are challenging times.
Look, I know sharing feelings is hard during this time of crisis.
Look, I, uh, I don't think that's gonna work.
Look, I'm sorry, but this is the future.
Look, I'm sorry, guys. It's for health reasons.
Look, it doesn't matter.
Look, let's just face it, you guys.
Look, let's just face it, you guys.
Look, Stan, Kenny was trying to find
Look, there's a chance we can help fight this new variant.
Look! Isn't this awesome, you guys?!
Look. Um... Do you remember
Look. We can't let scientists find that bat.
Looks like you're wearing a diaper for your chin.
Lost their livelihoods.
Lots of people eat Denny's and Applebee's.
Luckily I came out of it okay. I got this little
M'kay, I'll be right there! Where are you gonna
M'kay, m'kay, everyone! Alright!
M'kay, welcome, parents, to this all school town meeting
M'kay, well, parents, we've made
M'kay! Boom! You're all muted!
M'kay! I just muted everybody! M'kay?
M'kay? I can do this all day!
M'kay. M'kay, parents?
M'kay. Mrs. Marsh.
M'kay. Now, let's try this again.
M'kay. One of our fourth graders
M'kay. So they'll do just about anything.
Maintain six feet social distance
Maintain social distance and wear a chin diaper
Maintain social distance and wear a chin diaper if possible.
Make sure that Stan and Kyle
Make sure they know the password!
Make sure we have power to the big orange thing!
MALE VOICE 2: Come on inside and rejuvenate.
MALE VOICE: And we are the fastest growing retirement home
MALE VOICE: Attention. You are under quarantine.
MALE VOICE: Come on in and let your taste buds soar!
MALE VOICE: Shady Acres Retirement Megaplex.
MAN (over P.A.): ICU, please. Blue Team, ICU.
Man, poor Cartman.
MAN: Yes, Mrs. Testaburger, how can we help you?
March 16th! It was March 16th!
March of 2021?
Mark my words, Kyle.
May we have it for the rest of our days.
Maybe he'd go back to where it all started.
Maybe he's really changed.
Maybe I wouldn't be so bitter
Maybe if you were an essential worker,
Maybe my dad was right,
Maybe the Denny's side of you doesn't care,
Maybe the pandemic was a big test.
Maybe we can just stop the special by the lake on the way.
Maybe we just need one precedented time.
Maybe you can all do a lunch or something.
Maybe you didn't hear me, Kyle.
Maybe, maybe we can call Jesus and Santa
McCormick was a pioneer of science and technology
Me too, Dad. Do you think he'll be able to do it?
Me?
Me?
Menorah, hold your brother.
Middle cabinet, second from the bottom.
Mine, too. You are my whole world.
Miniature donkey with a lit up sombrero.
Moisha, Hackelm, kids, get your things.
Moisha! He's never talked like that before.
Mom, Dad, is everything okay?
Mom.
Morality? Father, if you were given
Mostly of digital fashion.
Mr. Donovan.
Mr. Garrison?
Mr. Marsh, exactly what week did you travel to China in 2019?
Mr. Marsh, we are all in lockdown
Mr. Marsh, we need to speak with you now, please.
Mr. Marsh. Mr. Marsh, guess what.
Mr. President, Dr. Fauci is on line two,
Mr. President! The CDC is on the line.
Mr. Slave?
Mrs. Cartman, can I talk to you, please?
Mrs. Cartman, I'm sorry for last night.
My "son."
My Alexa said that your Alexa had some info
My body is a temple and I'm not taking that shit!
My child, please, we are gathered in Christ...
My closest friends will know where to find it."
My colleagues and I have just been informed that
My entire family is in danger of being wiped out,
My family isn't safe, Father
My family would be really comfortable
My kids, I...
My little girl! (sobbing)
My name is Jimmy Valmer and, uh,
My name is Stan Marsh. I came to...
My name's Vic. Vic Chaos.
My name's Vic. Vic Chaos.
My savings. My house.
My son Clyde is not going to class!
My time is very short here.
My whole life I gotta get back to my job doing future comedy.
My wife is crazy.
Nah, he just waltzed right away like nothin' happened.
Nah. I don't wanna.
NARRATOR: And now, a Paramount Plus made for TV movie.
NARRATOR: From the green hills of Vermont
Need to see the research first, you know.
Need to stop trying to change the past!
Never happened, but just remember,
New, stronger vaccinations have ebbed the tide.
NEWSMAN: A brand new variant of the COVID virus has emerged
Next thing you know these people over here started chanting,
Next, please!
NFTs are a genuine innovation as one of a kind digital assets.
NFTs are an undeniable asset, especially in things
NFTs are gonna blow up.
Nice guy. Why don't I get you two
Nice to meet you guys.
Nice...
No bat involved. No bat involved!
No capital to see 'em through. Let me help you out with that."
No ******* people have sex
No matter how impossible it seemed.
No matter where you go in life...
No problem, I got it, Heather.
No way.
No, before that.
No, Eric, I can't just hide away while
No, guys, it's okay.
No, I don't. But I bet someone here does.
No, in a class, with real teachers!
No, it wasn't an error, I'm sorry. I fucked up.
No, it's all good, Kyle. Eric Cartman brought him over.
No, it's not a dream!
No, kids.
No, Kyle, we can't let Butters down!
No, Kyle, why don't you fucking tell me
No, no, Cartman, I'm sure there are
No, no, I tried the Walgreens, they're all out of vaccines.
No, no, listen. You... You're awesome.
No, no, Mr. President, please!
No, no, Ms. Nelson, it's not a prank!
No, no, no, I don't belong here
No, no, no, I was being all high and mighty about it...
No, no, no, it's not a trick, Stan.
No, no, no! I said more "Mandalorian"!
No, no, no. "Uncle Kyle."
No, no, the virus did not come from a bat.
No, no! Okay! Okay, okay, hold on, I'm coming!
No, no. It's something to do with the pandemic!
No, really, we've all been through a lot.
No, Stan, listen to me. We were wrong.
No, stupid, we get them to invest in them!
No, these people are not my friends
No, this is not about Doctor Who,
No, you're what killed our fucking family, remember?
No, your marijuana had some special property that
No!
No!
No! I mean...
No! I won't let you stop me from killing you, Kyle.
No! I'm not giving up!
No! It's all the other stuff.
No! Never!
No! No, no, no! Don't call the doctor!
No! Shit!
No.
No. He is fucking with me.
No. I don't smoke marijuana, Randy.
No. I'm fine, Mom. You know, I'm strong.
No. No, he's not.
No. No, no, no, no...
No. No!
No. We have to get him out of here... now.
No. You know what? You guys are horrible!
Nobody can take that from you, okay?
Nobody else is even cool enough for me to ask.
Nobody is allowed in or out for the next 20 to 30 years.
Nobody is going in or out.
Nobody is going to touch my family.
Nobody knew anything about COVID when I fucked the bat!
Nobody needs the special right now!
Not flying to South Park, buddy.
Not now, please.
Not now, Stan.
Not only that, but when you buy three pounds or more
Nothing is more important than keeping old people alive.
Nothing. Alexa, turn on the TV.
Nothing's allowed in or out.
Now has to quarantine for two weeks.
Now I'm getting notes during commercial breaks?!
Now that I'm older, the dream isn't just a dream
Now we can reflect on our own lives.
Now we have hope.
Now we're gonna do some fingerpaints. You got that?
Now, due to county protocol, everyone that was in the school
Now, here we are at the top and we find investors
Now, if we don't get along,
Now, if we had some of that stuff back...
Now, listen! We're gonna start fingerpaintin' right now!
Now, Mrs. McGillicutty, let's say this
Now, now, now. Go!
Now, of course, it is the future
Now, of course, we only take Bitcoin
Now, we really just need to know
Now, we've made changes at the school,
Now, whatever your messed up beliefs are
O kay. Anyway, if you all follow me now to the micro labs,
Obviously we can't let anything happen to this pangolin.
Of another 40 to 50 years.
Of people to invest in NFTs. Just like he almost did you.
Of renowned scientist Kenny McCormick,
Of Shelley and so she killed herself!
Of some new COVID variant.
Of the COVID pandemic.
Of the COVID pandemic.
Of the mayor's health order.
Of the Pandemic Special,
Of the Pepsi Center where the Nuggets play!
Of their art but perhaps be paid
Of their fighting and decided to burn
Of this mysterious organization who is to blame.
Of you working in Egypt, lecturing at MIT.
Officer Johnston.
Oh oh oh oh oh!
Oh, and, hey. I'm really loving the Pandemic Special.
Oh, boy! Is this a dream?
Oh, boy.
Oh, come on, Mr. Marsh, don't be a grumpy pants.
Oh, come on! What kind of animal
Oh, come on. Now we're gonna start talking
Oh, come on. Think about it.
Oh, cool! Turn it up!
Oh, cut yourself some slack.
Oh, Dr. McCormick! Sure, I did some things for him.
Oh, dude, just all kinds of stuff.
Oh, for Pete's sake, here we go again.
Oh, fuck me.
Oh, fuck you!
Oh, God, we're all out of chin diapers!
Oh, God, you are such a piece of shit.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, good job, Stan!
Oh, great! Then you have some extra rooms.
Oh, h hey. If you're gonna come any closer,
Oh, hamburgers...
Oh, hang on. Sorry. Uh, didn't somebody say
Oh, here we fucking go again! Stop mask shaming, Stotch!
Oh, here we go, here we go.
Oh, hey, Clyde.
Oh, hey, Teachers. Sorry. W Wait. I'm sorry.
Oh, hey. How are you guys?
Oh, I don't know if this is a good idea.
Oh, I'm getting things going, too.
Oh, I'm so glad you're down
Oh, I'm sorry, did you know him?
Oh, Jesus, like the future needs another fucking pho shop.
Oh, Jesus!
Oh, just give us one minute!
Oh, my God, I love you so much
Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed.
Oh, my God, you're not gonna believe this!
Oh, my God! I forgot how much it sucks to be around everybody!
Oh, my God! Look at her! Ha ha!
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. I love you so much.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I don't know what to say.
Oh, my God. They killed Kenny.
Oh, nice try, Kyle. You're such a fuckin' dickhead.
Oh, no, Eric, I think your computer is freezing up again.
Oh, no, goddamn it. Not right now
Oh, no, I see! There's all this horrible stuff going on
Oh, no, no no. That... That's totally fine.
Oh, no, no! You can't make me!
Oh, no, sorry. We're closed.
Oh, no, this is just like when our people were
Oh, no! Oh, God!
Oh, no! You're not ending this pandemic!
Oh, no. Really? Can you guys hear me?
Oh, not now.
Oh, okay, I get it.
Oh, okay.
Oh, okay.
Oh, poor you! Poor you!
Oh, really? Because they were acting stupid?
Oh, really? That's cool.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
Oh, that's great!
Oh, that's okay. Guys, this is my wife, Yentl.
Oh, what a folly a shower seems
Oh, whoa, bummer alert. (chuckles)
Oh, wow, except for your orders of alcohol
Oh, yeah, don't wanna talk about that.
Oh, yeah? Well, if you're not gonna make Space Jam 2,
Oh, yeah. Cool. Thank you.
Oh, yeah. The time travel.
Oh, yes. You did.
Oh, you don't know, because you don't fucking have one!
Oh, you know, lots of stuff.
Oh, you mean the guy from the asylum earlier.
Oh, you old dog!
Oh, you wanna get drunk?
Oh!
Oh! 9:00 a.m. Time for school!
Oh! Oh, hey!
Oh. Hey, excuse me. We have an appointment.
Oh. Hey, excuse me. We have an appointment.
Oh. I said I hid 'em up my ass.
Oh. So now it was "****."
Oh. Sorry.
Oh. Um...
Oh...
Ohh oh oh oh!
Ohhhhhhh.
Okay, all clear.
Okay, all good. Come on.
Okay, and then you get a Stoney Duck NFT that's unique, too.
Okay, and, uh, you'll see there's
Okay, boys, light 'em up!
Okay, come on, next!
Okay, fine, there's a new upgrade available
Okay, fine, we'll be there.
Okay, geez, I'm sorry.
Okay, go! Go, go, go!
Okay, grab his keys! Grab his keys, you stupid ass!
Okay, great, cool. I'm down.
Okay, guys, fine, maybe NFTs are fine,
Okay, guys, let's settle down.
Okay, hold on, I'm not the bad guy here.
Okay, I see you're in one of our Mach Ten Super Plus rooms.
Okay, I think we're all here.
Okay, if nobody else wants to go first,
Okay, jut knock it off, fat ass.
Okay, Kyle.
Okay, look, guys, Kenny and I were still really good friends.
Okay, okay, here's what happened.
Okay, okay! Just stop!
Okay, old people.
Okay, so I guess just fuck me, then?
Okay, so you were right.
Okay, start the weed!
Okay, that's really cool. Uh, add that to my shopping list.
Okay, there you go.
Okay, thought we had gotten past that, but...
Okay, uh, um...
Okay, Vic, can you tell us about this?
Okay, we just find the shell, and the, uh... the outfit...
Okay, well, if you have any questions, please don't hesitate
Okay, well, obviously
Okay, whatever!
Okay, you all just sit for a minute and think about it.
Okay! I don't wanna think about that right now, Mickey.
Okay.
Okay. I'll add Mark VII headphones
Okay. I'll set a reminder that you should stay positive.
Okay. Okay, Butters look!
Okay. Okay.
Okay. Save me from what?
Okay. Thank you very much!
Okay. Thanks.
Old person has escaped. Warning.
On an electronic peppermill
On new inventions and theories
On what exactly killed Kenny McCormick,
Once again, the pangolin
Once and for all.
One can of shaving cream per family!
One moment, Doctor.
One name keeps popping up: Victor Chouce.
One person?! Well, who is it?!
One precedented time.
One question is on everyone's mind...
One question remains:
Only certified medical personnel are allowed to examine cadavers.
Only one way out now.
Ooh! Tell Fauci to shove it up his ass
Open their eyes?
Or a fun thing you did over the summer."
Or cares about your stupid special right now!
Or else it's not really a "special," is it?
Or simply more COVID related symptoms?
Or their sister.
Or we will have to take action.
Or you are gonna be grounded!
Other than the culture that that movie is about,
OTHERS: Hi, Grandpa!
Our Alexas are talking, great.
Our sense of humor.
Our teachers are shooting people!
Our teaching staff does not feel safe to return.
Out of anyone who said it was just FOMO
Out of shellfish ness.
Out on cargo ships in Long Beach.
Out there and make the kind of money
Outside of town that found the pangolin
Over lunch or something...
Over there by Kyle.
Over to Thompson Lake and dump it.
P P Popsicles that are in the green room,
Pandemic! There's a pandemic! You can't make me go to school!
Pandemic... uh... Special...
Pay their respects to Dr. Kenny McCormick.
PC PRINCIPAL: All right, everyone, listen up.
People all over the country are beginning to realize
People are dying, Randy.
People are really trying
People need this right now!
People of South Park,
People really need this right now.
People to invest in NFTs.
People were supposed to get kinder in the future.
People who eat Denny's Applebee's and know
Perhaps some other species
PHILLIP (on TV): Take this, darling Terrance.
Please do not quote the President in front of our child!
Please find the nearest tech coffee shop.
Please help see us through this new COVID variant.
Please help us to make it through this
Please listen to me.
Please stay. I am asking you to stay.
Please, if there's anyone who could
Please, my friend has to build a bear.
Please, Uncle Kyle?
Please, Uncle Kyle?
Please, we're not done!
Please!
Possible COVID exposure at four o'clock!
Praise be! I haven't seen you in ages!
Protesting slash looting is a violation
Put down the snowball and get back to quarantine!
Qualities that I see in my loving wife
Question the morality of this.
Rabbi Cartman?
Rabbi, I I really need to talk to you.
Randy Marsh had a little visitor today
Randy, you gotta try it! Go ahead. Take a turn.
Randy, you've gotta get in here!
RANDY: I am much easier to get along with
RANDY: I'm just getting sick of being here every day with you,
RANDY: Isn't it great to see Grandpa, kids?
Randy!
Randy?
Randy?
Randy?!
Randy.
Randy. Where are the car keys?
Rather, it is playing God.
Ready to pick up where he left off.
Really cool, but I'm so glad to be home! How are the kids?
Really doing great, too.
Referred to possible origins of the coronavirus.
Requiring an in person vocal scan of either
Right here in the middle, you know what this is?
Right, like you didn't want to murder your sister.
S Stick around.
Saying he'd discovered something that
Saying I'm trying to help people
Scared and confused and didn't know who to believe.
Schoo... eh... eh...
Scientists say that even though
Scott Malkinson, I went to school with you guys?
Scott Malkinson! Remember me?
Screaming about their love of Abraham!
See, this is exactly how you acted when
Seems like all of the scientists were murdered
Seems like we just keep hitting dead ends, you know?
Senior citizens are in here to keep them safe.
Set up a perimeter! I want all exit points sealed.
Shalom sachem, Clyde.
Sharon, I went to China. Remember? Last season?
Sharon, I'm sorry for the way I acted during the pandemic.
SHARON: Oh, God, no!
She didn't own half, she always hated weed,
She is so hot!
She's gonna be a total bitch about it.
She's not gonna come meet us, Kyle!
Shh! Hey, Jimbo.
Shh! You guys stay quiet. Someone is here.
Shift right ten frames.
Shit, shit, get back! Back, back, back, back!
Shit!
Should I add that to your shopping list?
Should I call the doctor?
Shouldn't be attempting to time travel!
Since the shutdown in March.
Since we've seen each other.
Sir, the whole town is under quarantine.
Sir! Sir, the townspeople are demanding
Sir! Sir, you have an urgent call on line four
Six feet, Mom! Six fucking feet!
So blessed to have you here.
So could you maybe just just get vaccinated real quick?
So I came up with a way to help everyone fight back.
So I can't be fingering people's buttholes.
So I don't want any unnecessary deaths.
So I don't want any unnecessary deaths.
So I knew how to go back
So many amazing friends I haven't seen in ages.
So many people have come for Kenny today
So maybe it wasn't the Chinese.
So much more than just food.
So please just have fun and we'll see you
So that nobody could complete Kenny's work.
So that this doesn't happen...
So that's it, huh?
So then we're stuck here in the past.
So we all took different paths because that's what humans do.
So we can get something important.
So we don't have any meat on the menu.
So we go to the asylum and convince them
So we got him an Alexa.
So we must quarantine everyone.
So we shouldn't talk about them.
So we trust more in fly by night Ponzi schemes.
So we will be keeping your kids here,
So we will have quiet time from 9:00 p.m.
So what do you wanna do, Kyle?
So when you think about it,
So why does it have a lock on it?
So you know, Clyde, I just thought,
So you walked out on all your friends and then
So you're saying you won't take the COVID vaccine
So, Kenny spends years researching time travel,
So, looks like the Broncos still suck.
So... So what happens now?
Sold at nearly 10% off our usual price.
SOLDIER: We got a runner!
Some amazing adjustments and hirings, m'kay.
Some dirty virus from "China"
Some dishes made from insect protein on the menu.
Some of you may have heard but there's a little virus
Some other places you can stay.
Some say no effect at all. The children are just fine.
Some speculate the pangolin took its own life
Somebody came into the store with a mustache.
Somebody's got to look.
Somebody's gotta find him!
Somehow inserted its DNA up into the pangolin.
Somehow mated with the pangolin?
Someone in your community is not vaccinated.
Someone in your community is not vaccinated.
Someone in your community is not...
Something at the town square! Everyone's gathering!
Something big's going on.
Something's wrong!
Soon there will be a Space Jam 6 and 7 and 8.
Sorry I was making love to my wife.
Sorry, friend, no flights in or out of South Park, buddy
Sorry, guys, you have me confused.
Sorry, I was just talking about a Star Wars movie.
Sorry, ma'am, it's the fucking future.
Sorry, the church is closed due to the COVID variant.
Sorry, we're getting some breaking news!
Sounds good, Kyle.
Sounds good. I'll be right back.
Sounds good. So let's go to Kenny's wake
Sounds like someone doesn't want us
Sounds like they're trying to get you kids back to school!
Space Jam 2 came out, and we all just kind of gave up.
Speakin' of which, what's the biggest
Speaking of suspicious, what do you call a trans woman
Special. Wait a minute.
Special...
Spoken like a true redneck!
Spreads throughout the world.
Spying on me in the changing room?!
St a a a a an!
Stan and Kyle. Stan and Kyle...
Stan Marsh, consultant
Stan Marsh?
Stan Marsh?
Stan Marsh? Where's Mr. Slave?
Stan, are you sure this is about Butters?
Stan, Build A Bear is currently by appointment only.
Stan, dude, what are you doing? This isn't gonna help.
Stan, Kyle and Cartman."
Stan, the phone's for you!
Stan, this is gonna be very difficult
Stan, wake up, I think we're here.
Stan, you need to forgive Kyle.
Stan, you really need employee assistance with this.
STAN: What the hell are you guys doing here?
Stan!
Stan...
Stan... you should come back here.
Stan's right. If we want things
Stan's right. If we want things
Stanley!
Start the car? Where are you going?
Start the initiation sequence!
Stay here, Butters.
Still became a scientist,
Still living in South Park and calling people fat ass, huh?
Stop acting like a child and support your dead friend, Stan!
Stop being a fucking victim. At least you get to go out
Stop it!
Stop pretending you have a happy ******* life!
Stop there.
Stop these individuals who would try to change the future.
Stop what?
Students at South Park Elementary School
Super spreaders!
Sure, he gave me a piece of paper so I could escape.
Sure, what's up?
Sweetie, I know these are challenging times.
Sweetie, it's all going to be over soon.
Take the kids and get back to the attic.
Taken to the hospital because you guys shot him.
Talk about an amazing haircut at an affordable price.
Talk to me, he can write an email.
Taste the difference.
Teachers are reporting there's no cause for alarm
Tegridy Farms' weed has seen a 400% increase in sales
Tegridy Weed.
Tell her it's all your fault and you're gonna get therapy!
Tell her you already found a therapist
Tell that little pussy if I had any grandkids,
Tell them to suck my asshole.
Tell Tom Kardashian to suck my
Than anyone else.
Thank God I brought this. Here ya go.
Thank God.
Thank you all for helping me get the Tegridy somewhere safe.
Thank you for your help. (grunts)
Thank you. Thank you, Father.
Thanks for choosin' Denny's Applebee's for your party.
Thanks for coming to visit.
Thanks for getting my hopes up, you asshole!
Thanks for saying that, you guys.
Thanks for turning out, everyone.
Thanks, everybody. We can do this!
Thanks.
That can be worn to bounce the energy.
That doesn't make any sense!
That going back
That happened in the past but I promise you...
That he might have known his life was in danger.
That he was on to something huge.
That I forgive you.
That I'm never going ever again!
That I'm never going to Build A Bear!
That I'm not telling you because it involves my father,
That is correct.
That is not okay, Moisha.
That is responsible for the way things are.
That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
That just seems slightly hypocritical, I'm sorry.
That Kenny compiled
That means Kenny still was bummed out we weren't friends,
That means we are gonna sit courtside
That scientists are getting closer to finding the origins
That students can return to school on Monday.
That Tegridy Weed is having a Pandemic Special!
That the vaccine would make me grow titties on my head.
That these three completely ruined everything
That walks into an abortion clinic?
That was it! That was the very last bit of Tegridy!
That was up inside the pangolin.
That would be the key to a vaccine, perhaps even a cure.
That you have me set to auto buy?
That, of course, is because here in the future,
That's a pretty goddamn good idea.
That's all I can sell you right now.
That's because Victor has been hidden from view...
That's crazy and you'd be able to face what happened
That's disgusting. Fuck you, Fauci!
That's enough!
That's great. Do those have the Prime delivery?
That's Hebrew for "thank you."
That's how long it's been!
That's how we can get my DNA into people!
That's impossible, Wendy. It's the fucking future.
That's it! We're all out of chin diapers!
That's it.
That's just it. Nobody knows. But whoever these people are,
That's just my Alexa
That's probably best!
That's really not important.
That's the best you could do, huh?
That's understandable, Doctor, but luckily I am orthodox.
That's what doctors are saying about
That's what the critics are saying
That's where his biggest targets will hang out.
That's where I've been.
That's why Dr. McCormick stole it from my barn!
The Alexa is really great, Stan. Thanks.
The aluminum should bounce the negative ions.
The animal that could lead us to a vaccine.
The animal that could lead us to a vaccine.
The animal which started the coronavirus.
The answer is in what we all do now, in the present!
The answers to some pretty heavy stuff.
The antiquated notion of centralized trust systems.
The basis of the entire ******* faith
The best moment in history to stop the COVID.
The bigger problem is that we can't even get
The Cabellero Grizzly.
The COVID Delta Plus Rewards Program variant.
The COVID pandemic from ever happening.
The creature was located in China
The date is November 3rd. It is 2:07 p.m.
The death of beloved scientist
The Eric Cartman I've known for 18 years
The first lady is here!
The foreign DNA inside the pangolin.
The Foundation Against Time Travel must do everything
The Foundation Against Time Travel?
The fuck are you doing
The fugitives broke out sometime last night.
The future is totally theirs and we let it happen.
The guy on the phone said it's important.
The head of NASA said, "We have lost
The historic moment is here!
The hospital? For what?
The isolation and the uncertainty.
The Mark VII headphones have a new edition coming out.
The mayor has called for help from infectious disease experts,
The millionaire philanthropist? Dr. McCormick?
The mysteries of COVID can be unlocked
The nearest tech coffee shop is in .82 miles.
The new outbreak in South Park is spreading rapidly,
The new outbreak started with the death
The only other thing I had were some seeds that I hid
The only way to truly stop all of this is to go back
The openings come on the heels of news
The origin of the coronavirus.
The pandemic happened and they made Space Jam 2.
The Pandemic Special is really amazing.
The Pandemic Special was a bad idea?
The pandemic's been awful.
The pangolin has mutated how?
The Park County School District is holding
The remains of Dr. McCormick right away.
The school for about two weeks.
The school is all filled up and the motels are shut down.
The special. The Pandemic Special!
The Tegridy Weed Special Event! Where the fuck is it?!
The town of South Park has been put under strict lockdown
The truth is...
The way it was! Online, in our own rooms!
The where? The school?
The whole stupid farm to the ground.
Their country has amazing beaches,
Their Stoney Duck NFTs.
Then 2021 happened, people thought the pandemic was over.
Then before long, he was trading them online.
Then everyone's gonna know she farted in P.E. class!
Then I'll need to ask you to leave.
Then I'm not gonna make Space Jam 2!
Then it can get cross contaminated
Then sell fucking Epcot Center!
Then sell the fucking thing!
Then soon we can get back to everything.
Then suddenly Kenny dies,
Then the pandemic came, and then the race wars.
Then they shut it all down.
Then they'll take social distancing away from us completely,
Then those people will get people to buy
Then we just gotta go do it!
Then what?
Then why hasn't he even called?!
There has to be a way for us to get in there.
There is an outbreak of COVID in your community
There is no reason to panic, but...
There was nothing else special about it.
There was one tiny bit they didn't find.
There you are, Mr. Marsh.
There you go. Shh. You're safe now.
There's a do over machine right over there! Look!
There's a lot going on.
There's a million ways around it!
There's a whole lot of people that can tell you how much money
There's even fresh footprints on the ground!
There's going to be a big meeting.
There's gonna be vaccines at the school?
There's got to be a clue here of who killed Kenny.
There's more.
There's no point now, son!
There's no real proof that a mask
There's nothing in South Park for me, Kyle!
There's nothing that could have changed the path he was on.
There's some kids who really can't take it anymore.
There's something you should know about the way Kenny died.
There's still no word from the hospital
There's the little ragamuffins!
Therefore the young man is in the hospital due to COVID.
These are people who have recently lost their jobs
These are very serious times, and nobody wants
These past few decades have been really tough.
These shutdowns anymore,
They believe in NFTs and we make all kinds of fuckin' money!
They can have on their phones 24/7!
They could be listening
They didn't want Kenny McCormick exposing them.
They even got to my son.
They got Applebee's, too.
They got it. They took it!
They have samples from the pangolin,
They just keep taking everything from him
They killed Kenny...
They might be on to us. Oh, God, no.
They need to speak with you urgently!
They needed us to lose it.
They never returned.
They now don't have what they need for a vaccine.
They said he was getting better.
They said I'd have to wait until April.
They think they're about to find a vaccine.
They took it all. They took the Tegridy.
They want us to go back to school!
They want you to cut the hummus joke.
They won't let us into the morgue.
They'll just have to make do the best they can in there.
They're actually talking about school opening up again
They're closer to finding a vaccine.
They're dependable and just as efficient
They're gonna let us go back to school!
They're gonna try and make us go back to school.
They're just gonna keep making more restrictions
They're not gonna let us see him!
They're probably in my pants pocket. Why?
They're saying they don't have nearly enough
They're the superpower now.
They've set up an emergency shelter
They've shut down all the motels.
Things weren't supposed to be like this.
Think like kids again...
This doesn't make any sense.
This hasn't been about Butters.
This is a hundred CC's of the COVID vaccine.
This is a picture of you... farting in P.E. class.
This is a violation of our freedom! Who's with me, guys?!
This is about actual time travel?
This is about real time travel.
This is all your fault, Mickey Mouse!
This is amazing!
This is bullshit!
This is Dr. Wendy Testaburger from inside the quarantine zone
This is exactly why I moved out of this hick ass town!
This is gonna be great.
This is highly unorthodox.
This is not the time for you to be dealing with
This is the key to saving our town!
This is the pangolin we tracked down in China,
This is the pangolin we tracked down in China,
This is what you've all been looking for, right?
This is where I lost everything that I cared about!
This is... This is racist television, and we're not gonna watch it!
This isn't cocaine, it's the COVID vaccine, isn't it?!
This isn't personal, Marsh. It's business.
This isn't the plan anymore! Do not kill Kyle.
This little sprout is humanity's only hope!
This might be our last chance at a job,
This tour is for scientists that specialize in pandemics.
This was once such a magical place.
This... is the last sprout of Tegridy Weed.
Thomas opened a restaurant in SoDoSoPa.
Those guys right there right clicked 'em
Those machines are behind an 86 Mag firewall
Those people are brave and deserve
Three pack filters.
Timmy!
Timmy!
To 6:00 a.m. every day. I don't want to hear
To a certain bat in Wuhan.
To a certain bat in Wuhan.
To avoid it becoming fashionable.
To be with all the other kids again!
To be without every resource available.
To build a science center for the students.
To celebrate me being a big boy at the dentist!
To certifiably crazy people?
To do our job!
To do something for the world.
To forgive those around us?
To get a rise out of me.
To get all the info from the machines.
To get rid of all the Mexicans.
To get the lab running again.
To go back in time and stop it from happening.
To go back in time, and we are the rebellion
To go back to normal, we have to do it ourselves.
To go back to the way things were?
To join his cause.
To jump from it to humans.
To keep an eye out for the creature.
To keep science from interfering with the will of God.
To know when the quarantine will end.
To let me help you through this?!
To let us bring Chouce here, easy.
To make myself feel better, because the truth is...
To make sure old people don't die.
To oppose time travel, I just want to say thank you.
To reach out to our family.
To say anything, because, you know, it's the future.
To see if some kind of bending was possible.
To see Kenny's remains. 'Cause we might find the truth.
To see one of our inmates.
To see there was actually no bat involved.
To sort it out is quarantined
To South Park, Colorado,
To stop people from time traveling?
To stop the people who have ruined the future.
To stop the schools from forcing us back.
To talk about how we're gonna get your kids
To talk to each other and share our memories of Kenny.
To tell our mothers and our fathers that we...
To the American People.
To the scientists for the vaccine. Ha ha.
To the verdant canyons of Arizona,
To try and contain the new variant.
To try and mess with time is wrong.
To try to find some answers.
To your family if you weren't a fucking asshole!
Toda raba, Uncle Kyle.
Together maybe for a little chin wiggle
Together we can stop him and stop this blasphemy of God.
Told you that he was trying to find
Tom, I'm standing in front of the newly built
Tonight's guest, First Lady Tom Kardashian!
Too bad he died, 'cause the future certainly sucks.
Totally beyond our control, we have lost most of our funding.
Totally beyond our control, we have lost most of our funding.
Totally different from Mrs. Spencer's Stoney Duck NFT.
Totally normal and as respectable
Travel back in time in order to stop
Trust me, another 30 seconds in that room and you
Trust me, I don't want to be here.
Trust me, I'm an expert.
Trust me, Kyle. It helps.
Try and help people open their eyes.
Trying to bend the fabric of time.
Trying to find out what happened to Kenny.
Trying to take the vaccines for yourself this morning.
Turned over.
Tweek and Craig, you guys find some aluminum foil.
Two kids even smelled it and asked who farted
Two weeks?! Yippie!
Ugh! Heather Williams' mom
Ugh. Whatever.
Uh huh.
Uh huh.
Uh oh.
Uh, Amazon thinks they might have discovered gold on Mars.
Uh, excuse me!
Uh, for those of you who don't know,
Uh, guys, why is there blood everywhere?
Uh, hey, everyone. I had a special visitor today.
Uh, hi. It's Stan Marsh.
Uh, no, I haven't.
Uh, no, kids, I'm sorry, but we can't stay here with Uncle Kyle.
Uh, no.
Uh, okay, sir, if you don't want to eat,
Uh, okay, we're gonna have to get back to you on that.
Uh, that famous eccentric scientist died.
Uh, uh, yeah, I'm here.
Uh, we were there, and Token was actually
Uh, well, they haven't really done much of anything yet.
Uh, yeah.
Uh, yes, about 12:30.
Uh...
Uh... m maybe.
Uncle Kyle hates us because we're *******.
Uncle Kyle, he makes me so crazy!
Uncle Kyle, no, no, no!
Unh.
Unh.
Unique digital goods on the blockchain,
Unspeakable things
Up my ass, but they took them from me at the old folks home!
Us friends said we'd always be there
Vic Chaos made them, so don't just take my word for it.
Vic Chaos.
Vic...
Victor Chouce is actually Butters?
Victor Chouce is one of our patients here.
Victor is too unstable for phone calls. They confuse him.
Victor longed to go outside and play.
Victor was grounded in his room for over 16 years.
Victor, Kenny's dead.
Victor...!
Victor's parents left him grounded in his room
Victor's parents were very protective during the pandemic
Viral research center where scientists say they have found
Visit my dad.
VOICE (whispering): Randy.
W We have no idea what caused this.
W What are you...?
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute. Token?
Wait a minute. What did you say?
Wait in the car anymore; I had to meet your friends.
Wait, I'm sorry, that was uncalled for.
Wait, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait.
Wait!
Wait! Dr. McCormick, you forgot your chin diaper!
Wait. What?
Wait. What? What normal are you talking about?
Wanting to time travel. You know, they're all like,
WARDEN (echoes): Yes.
Was double down on our respect
Was taken to the hospital a couple hours ago, m'kay?
Was that I had secretly created a new strain of weed
We all fucked it up. These have just been...
We all need to just cut each other some slack.
We all wanna be happy, right?
We all want our little piece of the apple pie!
We are a community.
We are gonna take those fuckers down!
We are not allowed to say.
We are not responsible for what happens to you in there
We are really here, and we are gonna build you a bear!
We aren't sure why some people are getting a mustache
We aren't welcome here, children.
We as Americans went through so much.
We believe we can welcome students back on Monday. M'kay?
We can get you some nice ice cream, okay?
We can have them vaccinated and then this will all be over!
We can make things normal for Butters again
We can now house over 600,000 old people.
We can save Kenny.
We can try to get a tech team to drop in by helicopter
We can vaccinate them without them even knowing!
We can't even find aluminum foil.
We can't ever stop COVID from happening.
We can't go back to school. There's a fucking pandemic!
We can't keep pretending.
We can't sit around and wait for people to figure things out, okay?!
We can't spend another holiday feeling bad for Eric.
We can't tell you who it is because, in case you forgot,
We can't wait for quarantine to be over!
We cannot panic!
We certainly don't want you teachers
We could afford faster Internet.
We couldn't even understand what he was saying."
We did it! We found Kenny's hidden information!
We didn't know Cartman was against us.
We don't actually care about the marijuana, Mr. Marsh.
We don't have a choice. We're gonna have to break in.
We don't have authorization to see Kenny's remains.
We don't need to watch this! Where's the remote?
We don't normally allow outsiders into the morgue
We don't take visitations lightly.
We don't trust each other and we don't like each other.
We don't trust each other and we don't like each other.
We don't want anyone to panic, m'kay,
We don't want you to worry, because, you know,
We found Kenny's lab.
We got a small turtle with wings,
We got an appointment!
We got results from the PNR scan of Dr. McCormick's remains
We got things under control here.
We gotta get some more of this stuff.
We gotta surrender, fellas!
We have a Canadian.
We have a lot of work to do.
We have access to the machines, but the codes to operate
We have almost beaten COVID and the best news of all:
We have confirmation that one person in this community
We have more questions for Butters.
We have no idea.
We have proof and she'll do whatever we want!
We have reason to believe that Victor Chouce
We have run out of weed for the day.
We have several transformers down in our lab.
We have to find another place to stay.
We have to find some thin, reflective material
We have to get it somewhere outside of town.
We have to get there before Butters
We have to go back to being those kids we once were.
We have to know what ****d the pangolin.
We have to replicate it.
We have to respect his beliefs.
We just don't know.
We just gotta break the fuck outta here.
We just had another call asking to speak with Victor Chouce
We just have to finish his work.
We just need to make sure our crew is safe.
We killed Kenny.
We know, dude.
We lost that. We lost our sense of fun.
We may have a radical way to stop the new variant
We miss ya, honey!
We must be willing to use violence against violence,
We need assistance with our power
We need to go now.
We need to take him to Build A Bear.
We need to take this and analyze its molecular structure.
We need to talk to you about something urgent.
We need to wear them over our mouth and nose.
We needed to come together and act like us again.
We promise we'll be good, Uncle Kyle.
We reacted like shit. Because I was just...
We shouldn't have stormed the Capitol.
We tell Heather that if she doesn't get us courtside seats,
We told him everything.
We wanna help you.
We want to help you all be as comfortable as possible.
We we have a lot of questions for Mr. Chouce.
We were able to break down the virus enough
We were friends when we were kids. Let me see that!
We were so optimistic
We will go back in time. And we will kill Kyle.
We would have just set out to save our friend,
We wouldn't have been in the class,
We'd have to shut down the entire country,
We'd like to sign our friend here up for Prime membership.
We'll be doing it at half capacity.
We'll be right back!
We'll finally be able to unlock what caused a virus
We'll get back with the results.
We'll get you as much juice as you need.
We'll see if they like my special.
We'll see you at the funeral, I guess.
We'll stay back and watch the kids.
We're all safe, so we're shutting down
We're all stuck in South Park.
We're all vaccinated.
We're going to need... some aluminum foil.
We're gonna protest the vaccine
We're gonna put the stuffing in!
We're good.
We're never going to agree on certain things,
We're never going to find what Kenny was after.
We're not completely sure,
We're not even learning anything.
We're so sorry about this.
We've all decided centralized banking is rigged,
We've all decided meat is wrong.
We've all learned that insects are a valuable and sustainable
We've come here to show you something very important.
We've got a runner!
We've got jobs a and careers, people who need us.
We've just been sitting here talking
We've learned that we might never get back to our old lives,
We've learned to all just get along and love each other.
We've shut down, and people have lost their businesses,
Weaker kids like... You know, like Butters.
Weed can't solve all your problems.
Welcome to Denny's Applebee's Max.
Welcome to South Park Elementary.
Well, and people who were interested
Well, are we protesting, or are we rioting?
Well, can we come talk to him in person then?
Well, can you bring him here? We need him to access the machines
Well, Doctor, if it's for that,
Well, everyone, I just wanna make a toast.
Well, fuck all of you!
Well, have a seat.
Well, here!
Well, hey, fellas!
Well, how does it feel to be back after all these years?
Well, I don't know what you're gonna do, Mayor.
Well, I got to go, guys.
Well, I guess that's it.
Well, i it's almost like another creature
Well, I know that we're all ready
Well, I suppose so. I don't know...
Well, I'll tell you what, guys,
Well, I've only fucked one!
Well, it is special, but you people
Well, it was nice seeing ya.
Well, it's just that
Well, it's really not a mask if you wear it
Well, Kyle already has a ton of followers who are
Well, let's get him...
Well, maybe I should have worn a mask more often but...
Well, of course! I wouldn't miss Canadian Boxing Day, buddy!
Well, Rabbi, are we doing this or not?
Well, so then maybe he also
Well, somebody has to.
Well, sure, it's me!
Well, that's great, Clyde. Welcome to the club
Well, that's it, guys.
Well, then I'm afraid we can't allow you
Well, they're a pretty awesome group
Well, we're about to! All we have to do is show Heather
Well, well, what can I do, Rabbi?
Well, why don't you just go get it?
Well, you came to the right guy.
Well, you can't just sit here and drink.
Well, you come along and try to fight it!
Well, you know, I've been doing some research, Clyde.
Well, you know, since it all happened.
Well...
Well... I guess we saved Kyle,
Wendy Testaburger, wow.
Wendy, can you read the first one?
Wendy, I've been trying not to say anything but...
Wendy, we haven't found him.
Wendy, you guys stay here and try
Wendy, you're back from Harvard.
WENDY: At the moment Kenny time traveled,
WENDY: Guys! Over here!
WENDY: This must be where Kenny was doing all his research.
Wendy?! Token?!
Wendy's right, you guys.
Wendy's told me a lot about you, Stan.
Went back in time, and we still went in after him.
Wh What?
Wha no, no, no! We need to get this out to people!
What like, like what?
What a fantastic audience, wow.
What a fantastic audience. Wow.
What a terrific audience.
What about the connection you just found
What am I supposed to do with my Boxing Day presents, buddy?!
What are you doing here?
What are you going to do, fat ass?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
What are you working on, Clyde?
What are, what are you talking about?
What did you want to talk to me about?
What do you mean Butters is there? He just showed up?!
What do you mean it's not the plan anymore?
What do you mean?
What do you mean? What's happened?
What do you want, Marsh?! I'm in the fucking weeds here!
What does that mean? Are you vaccinated, Clyde?
What does this mean?
What exactly did he do?
What fucking sanctimonious means
What got us through the pandemic
What happened to Shelley was your fault, not mine!
What happened, happened. And I just want you to know...
What have what have you guys been talking about?
What have you been doing during the pandemic?
What have you been up to?
What I wouldn't give for just one precedented time.
What if Butters is actually starting to lose his mind?
What if he feels his body shutting down right now?
What if he's dead, Randy?!
What if we've been trying to solve the wrong problem?
What if you took him out there and, God forbid,
What is it now, Scott?
What is the nature of your inquiry?
What is up with these bisexual Canadians, huh?
What lingering effects will the pandemic have on children?
What new teachers?
What normal are you talking about?
What proof do you have?
What the fuck are you talking about?
What the fuck are you talking about?
What the fuck is a pangolin?
What the fuck is going on?
What the fuck is wrong with you?!
What the hell are you doing here?
What the hell are you doing?
What the?
What they've been doing up there.
What thing?
What was that? Alexa, freeze the video.
What we lost, Stan, was our Tegridy.
What we need to know...
What we still don't understand is,
What we would have done
What would a real ******* person do to save his family, Kyle?
What, do you expect us to just... build our own bear?
What, Jimbo?
What?
What?
What?
What? You can't leave! You have to get back onstage!
What?!
What?!
What?!
What?!
What?! Fucking what?! Ha ha.
What?! We're going to kill Kyle?
What'd they say?
What's going on now?!
What's going on, Dad?
What's going on, then you need to talk to him.
What's going on?
What's it? Ha ha.
What's the matter, dude?
What's the problem, Kyle?
What's up is that I am over this!
Whatever.
When everything was awesome.
When it's non essential!
When Kenny bent time, the negative ions
When my generation is being denied their lives!
When the pandemic first started.
When the pandemic started, you were only a kid.
When the pandemic... first started.
When they let COVID break up their friendship
When we fucked that bat in Wuhan?
When we tracked the virus, we found it did originate
When you get back to the past just remember, find a gun.
When you had intercourse with a pangolin.
When you sold your "Mulan" shit to China!
Where are the car keys?
Where do you think he got all the money to do his experiments,
Where have you been, Rabbi? Everyone's been looking for you.
Where he might have hid it?
Where hundreds of people are coming to
Where is the damn pangolin?
Where scientists are studying it thoroughly.
Where?
Where's all the equipment?!
Which is what we believe started it all.
Which is your fault.
Which made these guys beat the living hell
Which one you want? You want the panda?
While Ethereum is in a dip.
While others think that... Sorry.
While they went to see a movie in Denver.
Who burned all of Tegridy Farms to the ground.
Who cares what started coronavirus?!
Who did?
Who else can we call, Stan?
Who has something that they want to share?
Who hasn't come to see me in over 20 years.
Who I don't want to face!
Who Identify as Homosexual But Were Born Bi.
Who Kenny said ruined the future, was you guys?
Who knows what will happen, my love?
Who might know what Kenny's talking about.
Who must secretly and urgently...
Who owned and operated her own tanning salon.
Who started the pandemic is racist.
Who the heck are you, man?!
Who the hell is that?
Who told you that?
Who was actually trying to fix things.
Who was always trying to unlock the key to a better future.
Who was taken to the hospital due to COVID.
Who who the fuck is this?
Who would like to lead the class with some math?
Who would want us to lose our optimism
Who's a little hetzpah?
Who's fucking coming up with all this science?"
Who's my little meshugana?
Who's the broad?
Whoa Hey, ladies, lemme tell you about a great deal.
Whoa, cool.
Whoa, m'kay.
Whoa!
Whoa!
Whoa. I've never seen a Nuggets game in person.
Whoever controls the world and killed our friend
Whoever Kenny was after,
Whoops.
Whose fault this all was.
Whose parents didn't love him. My name's Vic.
Why are you acting all weird, Turd?
Why are you making us go? Why?
Why are you worrying about this right now?!
Why did you even bring me along if you're not going
Why did you send that to me?
Why do I have to be the one to go back in time and kill Kyle?
Why doesn't anyone tell me the truth?!
Why don't you go talk to your father?
Why don't you grow up and start acting like an adult
Why is your name all over Kenny McCormick's research?
Why shouldn't you guys be making the kind of cash
Why would he have Tegridy Weed in his equations?
Why would I do that?
Why would I invest in a digital good?
Why would I need an electronic peppermill?
Why, you son of a bitch
Why's he talking about your special?
Will our chin diapers keep us safe?
Will stop at nothing to break us apart.
Will you listen to what I'm saying?!
Will you please knock it off?!
With all your beliefs, that maybe you'd wanna
With Craig Tucker, whose father
With Disney and Mickey Mouse. You remember all that?
With my bare hands!
With NFTs you can give your customers
With restricted access,
With the aquaponics, the weed is already putting out new sprouts.
With the diabetes. No?
With the equipment here I'm able to make it grow up so fast.
With your dad's farm that can help everyone figure out
Without any employees?
Without morality, there is no God.
WOMAN: Stan?
Working on getting drunk again.
Works for Coors in Golden!
Would have sex with a pangolin?
Would have started considering NFTs as a viable investment.
Would have still been here,
Would you like to get started?
Would you like to know more?
Would you like to know more?
Would you like to know more?!
Would you mind wearing a, you know, chin diaper?
Wow, that's very big of you, Kyle.
Wow, what a great audience.
Wow, what a great audience.
Wow, what a terrific audience.
Wow!
Wow!
Wow.
Wow. This is crazy, huh?
Y Yes, we've been able to trace the virus
Y Yes, we've been able to trace the virus
Y You see, I...
Y You're Randy Marsh, right?
Yeah, because you got all self righteous about everything.
Yeah, but it's all good.
Yeah, dude, but I'm busy working.
Yeah, for the students.
Yeah, he spent years in his room
Yeah, I can't be stuck in quarantine
Yeah, I do.
Yeah, I fucking know, goddamn it!
Yeah, I get it, the Eric Cartman you guys knew
Yeah, I know, but I can't just turn myself in!
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, I mean, I I think it's a personal choice.
Yeah, I saw. Only problem is
Yeah, I'm a pandemic specialist. I'm making one right now.
Yeah, it's me.
Yeah, it's real. Come on!
Yeah, just here for the holidays.
Yeah, Kyle, it's all good.
Yeah, like it was my fault your mom shot herself!
Yeah, listen, I have to get out of here.
Yeah, me, too!
Yeah, me, too. Sucks about Kenny, huh?
Yeah, no, it was definitely the Chinese. Oh, God.
Yeah, so? I read about this.
Yeah, sometimes I think the pandemic really aged me.
Yeah, thanks.
Yeah, that's because you guys don't think
Yeah, that's good social distancing. Real good.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, the future fucking sucks.
Yeah, we all were.
Yeah, we care way more about what's right than you do, bitch!
Yeah, we had to shut down again!
Yeah, we know.
Yeah, well, the pandemic is about over now.
Yeah, what happens when my son is sitting in a room
Yeah, what's it mean, Daddy?
Yeah, yeah, what's up, buddy?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! Tsst tst tst!
Yeah, you know, when the whole pandemic happened,
Yeah, you like how Abraham trusted in the one true God?!
Yeah, you like that? Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah, you never do fucking anything!
Yeah! It's a bat!
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah. It's looking good.
Yeah. Kenny was right.
Yeah. Look, man. I just wanna say thanks. You know?
Yeah. My husband, Darwin.
Yeah. Pretty fucking interesting.
Yeah. Uncle Jimbo.
Yeah. Well, it's nice you care about your friend.
Yeah. Yeah!
Yentl? Her name is Yentl?
Yes, but that's besides the point.
Yes, but we must wear them where the mustache would be.
Yes, but we're running at about 40% capacity right now.
Yes, don't we all
Yes, due to COVID.
Yes, here it is. I'm sorry, Mr. Broflovski,
Yes, I believe that could be arranged.
Yes, I know, it's been a long time
Yes, it actually was!
Yes, it was all Stan's fault.
Yes, Kyle, I totally got that.
Yes, now that we have the animal in our possession,
Yes, she had a marijuana problem.
Yes, Teacher, I'm here!
Yes, that is correct.
Yes, that is correct.
Yes, they're open, but we are not the Johnsons,
Yes, we are all vaccinated.
Yes, we have to kill Kyle.
Yes, yes, I'd like to know more.
Yes, you see, what we needed was the foreign DNA
Yes, you've convinced me of that.
Yes! My brother Jimbo, who is in the hospital!
Yes?
Yes?
Yes? This is the President of the entire United States.
You act affects other people?
You always dreamed of making.
You are a child, Randy!
You are a fucking fraud!
You are being quarantined.
You are fucking out of here!
You are not going to like what you're about to see.
You are violating a mandated safer inside order!
You bought about six dozen animated gifs,
You burned down the farm because you were angry.
You can theorize all you want on changing events
You can't go back and change the past.
You can't just get stuff without me approving it.
You can't make us stay here!
You can't... Arghh! Aaaghh! No, no, no!
You could just be sick again
You could use some tegridy, China!
You could watch Amazon movies wherever you go.
You crazy, psychotic... Kyle, we need to get a lawyer
You deserve? Am I right?
You did not "fucking fix everything,"
You did the best you could during the pandemic, honey.
You didn't even try! He didn't try
You didn't know your sister was in the barn.
You didn't quarantine yourself after you got home?!
You do all this to protect us. This isn't you, my love.
You do whatever it is you need to do.
You do whatever the fuck you want
You don't have to be on Zoom.
You don't remember the pain we all went through.
You don't want to infect your families, do you?
You don't... You don't actually build your own bear...
You ever have sex with a pangolin?
You expect me to do everything for you!
You expect people to wear a diaper over their nose?
You gave Victor a piece of paper?
You gave Victor a piece of paper?!
You get a complimentary Pandemic 2020 bong.
You got some shit on your face.
You got the wrong guy, Mr. Cartman.
You gotta come back to South Park.
You guys you guys, Heather Thompson
You guys are being racist!
You guys are everything to me.
You guys are hearing this, right?
You guys aren't safe!
You guys go. You were the closest to him.
You guys might wanna see this.
You guys we were right.
You guys were gonna trick me into taking the vaccine?!
You guys were right, okay?
You guys, I know what to do.
You guys, I'm sorry for acting like a dick during the pandemic.
You guys, listen. In Kenny's work
You guys, we have to get Butters out of here.
You guys, what the hell is that?
You guys! You guys!
You guys?! Shit!
You guys... What? What'd he say?
You had sex with a pangolin
You have done this your whole goddamn life.
You have five minutes to come out
You have no idea if it's because of the special!
You heard what the scientist said!
You judge me, you all sit here and judge me.
You just need to do exactly what we tell you.
You just started acting like everyone else was stupid.
You know I can hear you through the walls!
You know that I know something about Kenny
You know we can't get into the school!
You know what I'm talking about!
You know what they say about Asian airlines
You know what us **** say.
You know what you're doing, fat ass!
You know what's a trick?
You know, getting stuff going.
You know, he's a really great guy
You know, I had a friend once who was a Polish hair stylist.
You know, in many ways, death is like diabetes.
You know, in the Torah, when Abraham
You know, it's the future we can't let old people die.
You know, it's the future.
You know, not every kid is like us.
You know, Rabbi, I'm just starting to
You know, today I was on the subway
You know, we were just going a little bonkers there.
You know, we've all been through a lot these past several months.
You know, you've got these people
You know? Just...
You little ones are always good.
You lure your customers in with some
You made me lose my tegridy and anything special that I had...
You made the deal with the devil
You mean it, Dad?!
You might be able to stop the pandemic!
You opened the school and gave us barely enough resources
You really let her have it! Oh, boy!
You really think it's that bad?
You really wanna go back to that slavery?!
You really wanna spend the next year on Zoom?
You regret this day for the rest of your life.
You said I should get whatever.
You said it... a drug is a drug, and I'm not who I used to be.
You said our equipment was too extreme.
You said you were open today for appointments!
You say you might be able to stop the McCormikron variant?
You see, this pangolin's DNA has mutated,
You should really get in now
You shut the fuck up!
You spend your whole life trying to fight it off
You started COVID?
You stop being a fucking monster to the people around you!
You tell that piece of shit that if he wants to
You there!
You think he got the virus?
You think I want to be here?
You think it's a cover, Token?
You told me to fuck the bat!
You took all our funding away.
You traced the virus to Wuhan,
You wanna maybe... spend New Years together again?
You want nothing to do with the Pandemic Special.
You want the Bronco koala?
You want to maybe do a little bump?
You were all exposed to a student here
You were the one who
You will.
You won't even know we're here.
You won't remember this speech because it will have
You, yes. Who's a little mister, yes.
You'll find out...
You'll need it someday.
You're a fucking alcoholic piece of shit!
You're gonna fingerpaint... "a marsupial of your choice
You're just going to sit there and not do anything?
You're just gonna have to joke about something else.
You're just gonna haveto trust me, okay?
You're not sorry, you're just high.
You're out of your room hanging out with me now.
You're quite a popular man, Victor.
You're sorry, again.
You're supposed to wear your mask over your nose.
You're thinking, "What can Vic Chaos do for me?"
You're trying to trick me. I'm going to save the future.
You're welcome. It doesn't mean that you were right
You've got Tweek and Craig tied up from the rafters.
You've really got an excellent bargain here.
You've upset him and I specifically asked you not to.
Your dad fucked the pangolin every single time.
Your dad's weed was just around.
Your friend Kyle didn't have an Alexa,
Your friends are all kind of douchebags.
Your fucking marijuana!
Your liver is... already in trouble.
Your mom died the day her daughter burned to death!
Your name is Butters and I wanna know how you're helping Kyle.
Your only chance! For your normal, not mine!
Your parents are here to pick you up. So let's go.
Your personal p p preferences.
Your presence is requested, sir.
Your son and his friends are going to try
Your son and his friends are trying to stop all this
Your son is here.
Your theories seem to point to some kind of people with power.
Your Uncle Kyle wants to go back and change things.
Yup! I just made manager.
Yup.
Zoom...
Best you can. So let's start today, guys,
Dad? I gotta go!
Eric, you can't... Ahp! Get back! Get back!
every other day... They can't do that!
He found it! The pangolin!
Here's to China! Ha ha! To China!
Hey! Cartman, no!
Hi! I'm... I'm here!
I sure am, fellas! Okay!
I want to hear this, Randy! No!
It's the pangolin! Look!
Jimbo's better? They said he doesn't have
Mr. Broflovski?! Dude, get outta my house!
Oh, God, no. What?!
Oh, my God. They won't get away with this!
Oh! Randy!
Ohh! Ha ha!
Okay, okay. Shh! Ha ha!
Okay. No, it's an awesome special.
So?! "So?" What the fuck?
They're busy. These are unprecedented times.
This is gonna be great. No, uh...
Uh... Uh... Shh!
We can't go. What do you mean?
We're going back to school! What?
Wha? Don't worry.
What? People are hurting.
What's a pangolin, Mom? I'm not even sure.
Yeah! Look how ugly that thing is!
Yeah! Look how ugly that thing is!
...be sorry. I totally forgive you!
"Uncle Kyle." Fuck you, Kyle.
(all cheering) Hey, Stan!
(all cheering) Kenny!
(banging) Shit, it's Kyle!
(banging) Who is that?!
(chiming) We came together
(explosions) (electronic trilling)
(groans) * This is the doorbell *
(groans) Okay, there we go.
(groans) Stan?
(gunshot) (grunts)
(laughter on TV) (doorbell rings)
(laughter) Have you seen this?
(laughter) M'kay
(loud zapping) The sequence is active!
(moaning continues) Yeah! Oh, oh, yeah! Yeah!
(moans) CARTMAN: Yeah!
(murmuring) Now we all need to stay calm.
(phone rings) Yeah.
(scoffs) Menorah! Fuck you, Kyle.
(screams) All you fucking do is hurt people!
(shouting) Butters!
(squishing) We've got it.
(TV chimes) You know,
(urinating) * Loo, loo, loo *
(Yentl moaning) CARTMAN: Oh, yeah.
* Brave. * Look, we're on the jumbotron!
* Of the * Whoa!
* We are all * Thinking we can time travel.
* Yeah! This is the doorbell! * (yells)
* You and me... * It's the future.
About what? About all this stuff that
Alexa, stop. You fucking stop!
Alexa... Find the asylum your fucking self!
All right, let's do this! I'll drive, get in the back.
All right, Vic. Do your thing. (knuckles crack)
almost sacrificed his only son?! Oh, yeah!
and globally. You guys, this is a trick.
and you said nothing. I didn't fart in P.E. class!
at the funeral tomorrow. (applause)
Back off! Let's go, Mr. Marsh!
Butters. Aah!
Can I help you? Yeah, Stan Marsh.
Cartman changed his mind. I did not change my mind.
Cartman, go ahead. No, I can't do it.
Cartman? Yeah, but he's changed.
China? China.
Come on, hurry! Get your hands off of me!
Come on, Mr. Marsh. Who...?
Dad! Goddamn it, Stan,
Don't Be careful with that. Then put down the gun!
Dude, he's here. Who's here?
Dude, what? You guys... (panting)
Eric, I'm scared. Are they going to get us, Papa?
every ounce of our respect. (cheering)
Excuse me? Just ignore him.
Fuck you, Cartman! Fuck you, Kyle!
Fuck! (groans)
Ha ha. Fuck you, Uncle Kyle! Hackelm.
he doesn't trust me. Because he killed his mom.
He what? Wow.
He's back helping us again. Lemme lemme talk to him.
He's fucking with me. What? Oh, yeah.
Heather. Heather. I didn't fart in P.E.
Hello? KYLE: Oh, hi.
Hey, dude. Hey, dude.
Hey, now, come on. Shh!
Hey! Ike! Ike, hi!
Hi, Dad. Oh, hey, Stan.
How the hell do we do that?! Just start looking!
I got self righteous? Yeah, you got self righteous.
I love you! Huh?
I told you, stupid. Shut up, Dad.
I'm sorry?! Oh, my God, Kyle!
It did? No
It's all gone... Dad!
It's Scott Malkinson. Who?
Jesus fucking Christ! Your friends don't even like you!
Kyle? Oh, dude, it is you!
Let me put it yet another way, Dr. McCormick. Hang on a second.
Let's go, Nuggets! (clapping rhythmically)
let's not forget that... Excuse me. Everyone?
No. I'm sorry.
Oh, God. TOKEN: Stan, listen.
Oh, is that, uh...? Yeah, that's that's Kyle, yeah.
Oh, my God. What?
Oka (groans) It's okay.
Okay, just sit tight. What was that?
Okay, let me help with that. I can also help.
Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Oh, okay, great.
on that thing he hid. You know
on things... Oh, so now
our friend's... He didn't make money off NFTs,
really unprecedented times. Unprecedented times.
Really? Fuck yes
Really? Fuck yes!
Really? Fuck yes.
ruins everything. Let's go!
She's trying to buy NFTs. Wendy, you've been tricked.
Should I set a course? Yes, thanks.
So? So?
So? So?!
Stan Marsh? Yeah?
Stan? Alexa,
Stan? What are you doing here?
Sure, yes, tell me more. Okay.
Sweet. Listen, Stan...
that's all. SHARON: You think
That's the town you grew up in? STAN: Yeah.
the pandemic started to... Wait!
Uh, no, sorry. I hung out with you guys
Uncle Kyle! Uncle Kyle,
Victor Chouce? Yeah.
We're gonna be okay, kids! KIDS: Yay!
We've got to stay optimistic. No, dude, it fucking sucks.
Wendy, what happened? Nothing yet.
What is this really? What do you mean?
What? Freeze video
What? You don't tell people
What?! Kick him in the balls!
What's wrong with Stan? We're just...
when you lose this friendship. Enough of this crap!
Where the fuck is it? What?
Who had diabetes? Oh, yeah, sure...
Who's this? It's just my Alexa.
win the war against COVID. WOMAN: Stan?
Yay, Daddy! Fuck Uncle Kyle!
Yeah, I'm vaccinated. Me, too.
Yeah, sure. Wait, Stan?
Yeah! (cheering)
Yeah! ALL: Yeah!
Yeah. Clyde, have you heard of
YENTL: Oh, yeah. CARTMAN: Oh, yeah!
YENTL: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, you like how Abraham
Yes, I do! Same ol' Kyle.
Yes, Kevin. Can we change our name?
Yes! That would be amazing. All right!
Yes? Um...
Yes. Well, it doesn't matter.
You did? And now we can finally
You don't even have any..
You trying to see my dick?! Butters, Butters.
You're a goddamn phony! Oh, really?
'Cause Foundation Against Time Travel is FATT.
'Cause in the future you're old for a long, long time.
'Cause then we'd be FITT.
'cause they're really the future.
'Cause what matters is these people right here
'cause you guys suck.
'Cause you know, here in the future,
'Cause you seem really desperate to build a bear.
'cause you're a fat fucking alcoholic,
"all relevant information.
"an innovator and a visionary.
"Hey, enough science. Who's science?
"Hoddle, Hoddle," and their NFTs started mooning.
"In the event of my death I have hidden away
"It's not a movie it's a made for TV movie."
"Just my Alexa"? You're a piece of shit!
"Kenny was so brilliant that most of the time,
"Science this and science that,"
"Un cle Kyle."
"Uncle Kyle." Say it, Hackelm.
"Uncle. Uncle Kyle."
"you've got all these crazy ideas but you got
("I Forgive You" by Kelly Clarkson playing)
("Stir It Up" by Patti LaBelle playing)
(air hissing)
(alarm blaring over video)
(alarm blaring)
(alarm blaring)
(alarm blaring)
(alert beeping)
(all groaning)
(all groaning)
(all groaning)
(all groaning)
(all grumbling)
(all screaming and clamoring)
(all screaming)
(all screaming)
(audience cheering)
(audience cheering)
(band playing in distance)
(banging)
(beeps, whirs)
(beeps, whirs)
(beeps, whirs)
(beeps)
(beeps)
(bird cawing)
(bubbling)
(busy chatter)
(busy chatter)
(busy chatter)
(car beeps)
(car beeps)
(chain rattles)
(cheering and applause)
(cheering quiets)
(cheering)
(clears throat) Excuse me.
(confused chatter)
(coughing and groaning)
(coughing)
(crazed chatter and wailing)
(crazed laughter)
(door opens)
(doorbell rings)
(doorbell rings)
(doorbell rings)
(doorbell rings)
(electronic drum fill)
(electronic drum fill)
(electronic drumbeat playing)
(electronic drumbeat playing)
(excited chatter)
(farting on TV)
(farts)
(footsteps echoing)
(frantic groaning)
(gasping) Fuck...
(gasps) Hackelm!
(groaning)
(groaning)
(groans) All happened... so fast.
(grumbling)
(grunting)
(grunting)
(gunfire)
(gunshot)
(helicopter blades whirring)
(horns honking)
(indistinct chatter, grumbling)
(indistinct chatter)
(indistinct chatter)
(indistinct chatter)
(indistinct P.A. announcements)
(indistinct radio chatter)
(knocking)
(knuckles crack)
(laughs) Fuck you, Uncle Kyle!
(laughter)
(laughter)
(mechanical whirring)
(moaning)
(mockingly): My child, please, we are gathered in Christ
(muffled muttering)
(muffled shouting)
(muffled shouting)
(muffled): Hello? I can't see or hear anything!
(music stops)
(muttering)
(muttering): You can't even... Stupid.
(news theme volume increases)
(others exclaim)
(pained groaning)
(people wailing)
(phone rings)
(quiet chatter)
(Randy groans loudly)
(rats squeaking)
(rats squeaking)
(retches)
(rhythmic rattling)
(robotically): Exterminate. Exterminate.
(school bell rings)
(school bell rings)
(shouting)
(shouts) what the hell are you doing?!
(sighs)
(sighs)
(sighs) Yes, sure, add them to my shopping list.
(siren wailing)
(siren wailing)
(sirens wailing)
(smacking lips)
(sniffing) Oh, man. Thank God.
(sniffles) Okay. The newest humidifiers from Walgreens Max
(soft electronic music playing)
(soft electronic music playing)
(speaking Hebrew)
(squishing)
(static crackles)
(static crackling)
(straining): I have a lot of anxiety
(thunder rumbles)
(thunder rumbles)
(thunder rumbles)
(thunder rumbling)
(tires screeching)
(toilet flushes)
(water splashes)
(whirring)
(whirring)
(whistles)
(whistles)
(whistles)
(whistles)
(whistles)
(whooping and cheering)
(whooping and cheering)
(whooshing)
(wind gusting)
(woman speaking Japanese)
(woman speaking Japanese)
(woman speaking Japanese)
(woman speaking Japanese)
(woman speaking Japanese)
(woman speaking Japanese)
(woman speaking Japanese)
(yawns)
(yelling)
(yelling)
(yelling)
(yells, stammers)
(zapping continues)
(zapping)
* 'Cause boats are late... *
* 'Cause the damage is done *
* 'Cause the damage is done *
* 'Cause the damage is done... *
* 'Cause the lights are on *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* All doorbells sing, sing, sing. *
* And I forgive you. *
* And I'm coming home..
* And nobody's working in the future *
* And the home *
* And, and I forgive you *
* And, and I forgive you *
* Apparently in the future *
* But my present just done up and gone *
* Chase my dreams through the polluted air *
* Couple of kids... *
* Doing it our way *
* Doing it our way, no shame, no blame *
* Got to break it up now *
* Got to shake it up now *
* Happy birthday to you *
* Happy birthday, dear Stan... *
* I can't sit here while I go nowhere *
* I can't wait to *
* I can't wait to stir it up. *
* I don't wanna *
* I forgive you, I forgive me *
* I forgive you, I forgive me *
* I forgive you, I forgive me *
* I forgive you, we were busy living the dream *
* I forgive you, we were just a couple of kids... *
* If I hate you, what does that do *
* If I have to beg or borrow *
* In the future *
* In the future *
* It is the future! *
* It's the future *
* It's the future so doorbells sing. *
* It's the future. *
* Livin' in the future *
* Loo, loo, loo *
* Loo, loo, loo *
* Loo, loo, loo *
* Loo, loo, loo *
* Loo, loo, loo * (whistles)
* Mik helm, Mik helm, mit cloiska pudding *
* MTV. *
* Never noticed the glass ceiling falling on us *
* No shame, no blame *
* No shame, no blame *
* Now when do I start to feel again *
* Now when do I start to feel again *
* Now when do I start to feel again... *
* Pack my clothes up, baby, I'll be gone *
* Ready, set, go... *
* Running out of time *
* So I breathe in and I count to ten *
* So much pressure to keep holdin' on *
* Someone is at the door! *
* Someone's at the door *
* Someone's at the door *
* Stir it up *
* Stir it up, I've got to break it up now *
* Take it anymore *
* There's no room in this ol' heart of mine *
* They don't sell tostadas anymore at Taco Bell *
* This is the doorbell *
* Trying to figure out how to live *
* Vil plotz vit laughter, too *
* Walking on a wire *
* We are all *
* We are all in the future... *
* We are all living in the future *
* We are all living in the future *
* We are all, you and me *
* We are all, you and me *
* We are living in the future *
* We are living in the future *
* We can't get stuff 'cause boats are late *
* We can't get stuff *
* We're living in the future
* Welcome to the future *
* When I think about tomorrow *
* When I think about tomorrow *
* Wish I could go back to the present *
* With a brand new attitude... *
* You and me *
♪ 'Cause all I'm gonna do is sing ♪
♪ 'Cause no one's saying to me ♪
♪ About how much I love you and I need you ♪
♪ Another day inside, don't have to do a thing ♪
♪ Don't have to brush my teeth or shower ♪
♪ I can sit on the toilet for hours ♪
♪ I love you, social distancing ♪
♪ I'm cut off from the world ♪
♪ In your face, it wasn't a bat ♪
♪ Isolated, alone ♪
♪ It wasn't a bat, in your face! ♪
♪ It wasn't a bat, it wasn't a bat ♪
♪ No one can touch me or boss me around ♪
♪ No one's around, no one's talking to me ♪
♪ Oh, yeah, oh, yeah ♪
♪ Social distancing ♪
♪ Social distancing ♪
♪ Social distancing, I'm free ♪
♪ Stay away from me, Mom, yeah ♪
♪ This is what I call existancing ♪
♪ Yeah, social distancing, Mom ♪
♪ You got to keep your social distance ♪
♪ You kids should get outside and do something ♪

Viral
Funny