Michael Scott Soundboard Edit

Alright troops, this is an important day. Big day. Now you may look around and see two groups here. White collar, blue collar. But I don't see it that way. And you know, why not. Because I am color...

Am I going to tell them? No, I'm not going to tell them. I don't see the point of that. As a doctor, you would not tell a patient if they had cancer.

And you can hug it out, bitch.

Another rule of business is being able to adapt to different situations. Adapt react readapt apt, right? That's rule #2.

Another rule of business is being able to adapt to different situations. Adapt, react, Readapt, act right. That's rule #2.

Because you got a good life. You got a good life. A good life.

Boom, roasted.

Bros before hoes. Why? Because your Bros are always there for you. They have got your back after your hoe rips your heart out for no good reason, and you were nothing but great to your hoe. And you...

Cancel Christmas

Catch you guys on the flippity flip!

Come on, guys. Early worm gets the worm.

David, here it is. My philosophy is basically this, and this is something that I live by. And I always have and I always will. Don't ever. For any reason, do anything to anyone, for any reason, eve...

Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked. But it's not like this compulsive need to be liked, like my need to be praised.

Do you think that smoking drugs is cool? Do you think that doing alcohol is cool?

Don't drop the soap. Don't drop the soap.

Dragona

Drum roll please. Can anybody guess?

Drum roll.

Drumroll please.

Drumroll please. Can anybody guess?

Drumroll please. Who is?

Dwight, you ignorant slut.

Enablers

Everybody dance now

Everything's wrong. The stress of my modern office has caused me to go into a depression.

Feelin hot hot hot

Friends joke with one another. Hey, you're poor. Well hey, your mom is dead. That's what friends do. It's you're so.

Friends joke with one another. Hey, you're poor. Well, hey, your mom is dead. That's what friends do. It's you're so white.

Goodbye my lover

Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. No, don't.

Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Ohh I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes they spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. No, don't.

He is a good guy, not a terrorist

Hey, Hey, Hey, you idiot

Hug it out, bitch. That is what men say to each other after a fight. They hug it out. And in doing so, they just let it go.

I am Beyoncé always.

I am here to scare you straight!

I am here to scare you straight!

I can't believe you came. That's what she said.

I declare.

I do not understand what you spend your money on

I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon. Sue me and since I don't have a Butler I have to do it myself. So most nights before I go to bed I will lay 6 strips of baco...

I forbid anybody to freak out

I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car, so sue me.

I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me.

I have hemorrhoids.

I hope you're happy

I knew exactly what to do, but in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.

I love it Office

I saved a life. My own. Am I a hero? I really can't say, but yes.

I underestimated you. Yeah. Well, maybe next time you will estimate me.

I want the ketchup fights and the tickling and the giggling

I'll catch you on the flippity flip

I'll Kill You

I'm gonna kill myself. I'm going to kill myself, and it's your fault.

I'm just worried about my friend

I'm not a millionaire. I thought it would be by the time I was 30, but I wasn't even close. And then I thought maybe by the time I was 40, but. By 40 I had less money than when I was 30. Maybe by m...

I'm not superstitious, but I'm I am a little stitious.

I'm prison Mike. You know why they call me prison Mike?

I'm prison, Mike.

I'm really sorry, but I have to let you go and it's purely budgetary, it's not personal. Gonna kill myself? Wow. I'm going to kill myself and it's your fault.

If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, bin Laden and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.

If we come across somebody with no arms or legs, do we bother resuscitating them? I mean, what kind of quality of life do we have there? I would want to live with no legs. How about no arms? No arm...

It's happening! Stay calm! #event alert #happening #omg #stay calm #dont panic #fire alarm

Jim & Michael

Michael Scott A little sticious

Michael Scott Date Mike

Michael Scott Hate

Michael Scott Don't Like That

Michael's colonoscopy

Mr

My God, OK, it's happening. Everybody stay calm, everyone. What's the procedure? Got down? No.

My horn can pierce the sky

No God Please No

No God. No, God, please no, no, no. No.

Now, right now, you're the expert. Is this enough to get 20 people plastered? 15 bottles of vodka. Yeah, should do it.

Oh god, oh no no no!

Oh, Lazy

OMG that's it! #thats the signal #thats the sign #michael scott #steve carell

Out out out idiot

Presents are the best way to show someone how much you care. It is like this tangible thing that you can point to and say, hey man I love you this many dollars worth.

Something's happening! #oh my god something is happening #omg #finally happening #michael scott #steve carell

Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way.

Thank you very much, Sir. You're a gentleman and a scholar.

Thank you! Michael Scott

That's what she said

That's what she said

That's what she said.

That's what she said.

That's what she said. Michael.

That's what she said. Oh my God.

Thats what she said

The office twins

The Scarn Dance

They say that laughter is the best medicine. So Stanley, you can throw away those pills, you are cured. Actually. Better hold on the pulse just in case.

This is a damn shame

This place is freaking awesome.

This plantation

Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate, so he's really not a part of our family. Also, he's divorced, so he's really not a part of his family.

We're dying here

Well, well, well. How the turntables?

Wendy's Hello Wendy, this is Kevin's friend Michael. This isn't Wendy. Ohh, I'm sorry. Could you put her on please? Dude, this is a Wendy's restaurant. David. Kevin, OK. Could I just have a frosty ...

What am I doing? I am blowing dodge. I'm getting out of town. Whatever you call it, I am running away from my responsibilities. Arm feels good.

What is your problem?

When I said before that I was king of forwards, you got to understand that I don't come up with this stuff, I just forward it along. You wouldn't arrest a guy who's just delivering drugs from one g...

Where are the turtles

Why am I so sad?

Why are you the way that you are?

Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate. So much about the things that you choose to be.

Why? I'm taking responsibility and it is up to me to get rid of the curse that hit Meredith with my car. I'm not superstitious, but I'm I am a little stitious.

Why? I'm taking responsibility and it is up to me to get rid of the curse that hit Meredith with my car. I'm not superstitious, but. I'm. I'm a little stitious.

Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject, so you know you are getting the best possible information.

Worst thing about prison was the was the Dementors. They were flying all over the place and they were scary and then they come down and they sucked the soul out of your body and it height.

Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

Yes and dont call me shirley

You guys got it soft and cushy. This place is freaking awesome. The people are awesome. Your boss is nice. Everybody seems to get along. People are tolerant. People who have jumped to conclusions c...

You know what they say. Fool me once, strike one. But fool me twice. Strike three.

You're so f in smart

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