The Simpsons (1989) - Season 30 Edit

A 0.6!

A agree.

A bet that my grandson was a good boy.

A black hole of sadness and split ends.

A bossy female thinking machine is with another.

A break means forever.

A casa. I'm saved.

A case of orange drink, which we drank.

A chocolate flop

A cliff multiple times,

A Confederacy of Dunces.

A Confederacy of Dunces.

A confused old person.

A couple more kiteboarders.

A crazy, wrinkly, short piece of garbage.

A day that would soon change the Simpson women forever.

A deal is a deal.

A descent into madness better than you.

A desperate plea to the public for help.

A father whose ex wife only lets him see the kids

A gift card now, and an apology on my deathbed.

A girl Itchy & Scratchy?

A GL50 9K Smart TV.

A golden day with their dad.

A good breakfast can get you through a lot.

A great new reality show.

A heartbreaking story about a selfish man's one selfless act.

A hearty woo hoo!

A hip hop musical about our city's founder.

A hippie dippie science fiction vanity project.

A holistic mother might need.

A Hollywood movie

A hotel? But we lost.

A hyperextended tendon,

A Japanese game show needs an American celebrity

A jellyfish explosion and the most viewed

A John Travolta who is happy to be there!

A little more help.

A little more. A little more.

A lot of work for nothing.

A lousy game but a magnificent law.

A man dressed like a woman

A man who looked like a fabulous woman!

A modest, heroic man who stands up for what's right.

A motorcycle guy will whip you

A Mrs. Marge Simpson.

A no talent. A zilch.

A paper at Cornell University

A path to enlightenment without ego or possessions.

A perfect influence.

A prize winning novelist with no musical talent.

A regular housewife in need of empowerment, and now...

A sci fi story with a happy ending.

A second tail brain, loss of ears and increased libido.

A Smoothphone Jazzhonker in black nickel.

A special day where everyone dresses

A special thanks in the closing credits

A store in Ogdenville just put up

A strange and wonderful creature to the rest of you.

A tech first adopter.

A thousand bucks

A thousand dollars to play video games?

A thousand times more.

A thousand, huh? That must've been expensive.

A thousand. I wanted to start a business.

A town living in fear,

A truck broke down, and the cops are taking their sweet time

A TV recapper.

A very interesting man hiding in Medicine Hat

A woman? (laughs)

A yeah, I'm a regular Benedict Cabbage Patch.

A yup.

Aah, aah, aah.

Aah! Aah!

Aah! Incoming! Outgoing!

Aah! No!

Aah...

Abe Lincoln... Dumbo...

Abe Simpson, you dog.

Abe, I've never seen you so vibrant and alive.

Abe, promise me one thing.

About a dad who was desperate for money?

About dodgeball concussions.

About me to people on airplanes who just want to go to sleep

About the opinion of this pathetic bottom feeder?

About the SNC Lavalin scandal?

About world class dinner service.

About your time with this band, I am afraid it's almost up

Absolutely not.

Absolutely not.

Absolutely.

Absolutely.

Absotively posilutely

Accept the invite, stay the night.

According to Cyber Stalker.com,

According to the soundtrack to Hamilton, you were a real jerk.

Act out until somebody pays attention to you.

Acting out can take many forms,

Actually, I'm talking about people

Actually, Llewellyn, we're doing fine on our own

Actually, no.

Actually, you didn't

Actually...

Add more dynamite.

After 46 rejections, I can take a hint.

After all that you've been through,

After an emergency balloon landing,

After an underdone bagel.

After drugging your SunnyD with Special K.

After eating the Guess Your Weight Guy,

After he got us..

After I found out she was seeing other patients. Anyway...

After I lost my job,

After it bombs, that clown will come scooting his butt back here

After losing all hope.

After that garnish war you waged.

After The Big Bang Theory.

After the Rust Wars.

After this, we've got a stand up special

After we leave an envelope full of guilt.

After what the monkey did during that birthday party. (groans)

After you finish digging my pool.

After you sign the amazing waivers.

After you, Marge.

Against the Brazilian Blowouts, but...

Ah

Ah

Ah, geez. I won't be dating her grandma anymore

Ah, great, perfect.

Ah, I'm afraid I'm too old to try anything new.

Ah, isn't that cute? She learned an accent

Ah, my dear wife. I'm just here collaborating,

Ah, my muse.

Ah, now you're talking.

Ah, smooth. Bad, bad.

Ah, so Homer isn't coming, eh?

Ah, that's the Love Tester.

Ah, the legislative calendar is pretty full.

Ah, we've never had an employee get rehired so many times.

Ah, you are French

Ah, you boys are leaving me for video games anyway.

Ah, you deserve it, sweetie. You're the only person

Ah, you sure can

Ah!

Ah!

Ah!

Ah!

Ah! Help, Mother.

Ah. Don't look me in the eyes, Marge.

Ah. Fantastic!

Ah... you told me you've never been to Missouri.

Aha!

Ain't that right, Alexa?

Ain't the circus worse by far?

Air, nothing, more air, space, air,

ALEXA 2: I'm only for cookies and Pop Tarts.

Alexa, everything I say is a lie.

ALEXA: Alexa is only here to help.

ALEXA: Mr. and Mrs. Simpson,

ALEXA: That's right, he can't.

Alf, Roseanne, Moonlighting, The Cosby Show

ALIEN 2: Finding out the best of each other.

ALIEN: Giving the love that lets us go on.

ALL (chanting): One of us. One of us.

All because of my screwup.

All cows are ladies

All expenses paid.

All hands in.

All his dates have to give him transfusions.

All I ask is that you give me the performance

All I deserve is to sit alone

All I did was play the blues.

All I know is that as that gas gauge read empty,

All I'm saying is, if they ever make a female Mr. Magoo,

All of us in this one little room?

All red light long, baby.

All right

All right, boy. I'm gonna find out

All right, boys, let's put tops on bottoms.

All right, but beware,

All right, but you better tell the camels.

All right, everyone, saddle up for Juárez, Mexico.

All right, first order of business,

All right, I get it, I get it

All right, I'll just grab my pillow and sleep on the couch.

All right, kids, let this be a lesson

All right, let yourself go, and your partner will support you.

All right, let's go, people. They've defused us.

All right, let's see what you got.

All right, love, whatever love wants.

All right, Smithers, what's say you and I

All right, tell me who assaulted you, and we'll bring 'em in.

All right, we got a comic who wants to make

All right, we need to get to the master computer

All right, we'll make you talk.

All right, well, we'll get you into something.

All right, who's our Alexander Hamilton?

All right, you asked for it.

All right, you don't bray.

All right, you soda squirting hypocrite,

All right.

All right. The truth is,

All right. This time, he's really done it

All that work would have killed my love for music

All the bread you're gonna make selling Tubberware.

All the good ones are either married or Homer

All the money into his pocket,

All these coders never stop working.

All these people are screwed.

All they wanted was to be cherished.

All units, move in!

All units, move in!

All we find is candy coated peanuts, popcorn and a prize.

All we have is the vocal cord of a sheep.

All we need is a notary.

All we want back is the lowliest member of our crew.

All we're getting up here are little old ladies

All will be made clear.

All you have to do is watch TV and say things about it.

All you need is the wind and the waves.

ALL: ¶ Because circus clowning ¶

ALL: ¶ He's alive, someone quick call Channel 5 ¶

ALL: Ew!

ALL: Fake enthusiasm.

ALL: Hey hey, Krusty!

ALL: Marge! Marge! Marge! Yay!

ALL: Merry Christmas!

ALL: Yes.

Allow me to demonstrate.

Allow me.

Almost out of moon potion.

Already in labor.

Also, $600?

Also, don't forget to call someone about the water bill

Also, I hired a video game expert to tutor Bart.

Also, I'm worried that my son is feeling neglected.

Also, if I lose.

Also, if I turn the rummy away, they might wind up in church.

Also, now everyone knows you're the world's biggest hypocrite.

Also, there will be a Kia Sportage in the background

Also, we cook here,

Also, we have to start these lists earlier.

Also, we're stopping by the photo booth

Also, you look cute.

Although, I could've done

Although, I lost that, too

Although, I still am compelled to say flayvin.

Always wanted to be a paper boy.

Am I acting? No

Am I forgiven?

Am I in heaven?

Am I reaching you?

Amazing Zen.

Ambitious, eh, but unsatisfying.

Amen.

Amen.

America ain't perfect, but it's my job to make it better.

America can't pay for health care and give corporations

An "A"? Oh, my gosh, Bart!

An amiable guy who makes everyone suffer

An eating contest against the monstrous Cthulhu?

An inguinal hernia is no laughing matter.

An instant classic.

An interesting perspective, Congressman.

An obstacle course we call "The Ultimate Monster."

Ana, is this true?

Ana, what about you?

Ana, you're a scam artist.

Anastasia Alekhova, his new wife.

And "B," there is no hope.

And 58 people are looking at them.

And a drop of affection?

And a first time director, but show business is based on risks.

And a less exciting version of me has taken my place.

And a non writing producer.

And a section of your intestine has pushed through.

And a side of chocolate cheesy bread?

And a spreader bar, bindings, impact vest, chicken loop,

And a third thing.

And absence of metaphors.

And after that, my movie career was kaput

And after we're done, then what?

And Alcatraz has gone condo.

And all she wanted was her own secret giggle.

And and girls' clothing has no pockets,

And and I don't want you to get defensive,

And Anti Sciences

And Aqua Velva.

And as a sign of his mercy, he permanently scarred

And as for the rest, why don't you double check that name, huh?

And as horrible as that worked out, I'd do that again.

And as much as I don't enjoy doing this,

And ask them to dinner with us

And bam you're on the cover of Premiere magazine.

And being encouraging. I'll deny having said this,

And believe me, I know marriage law.

And believe me, I know marriage law.

And besides, the top Tubberware sellers

And big smile!

And bought him a top of the line computer gaming rig

And by the ancient law of the flyer,

And comes directly home to be with his kids.

And control the map.

And crushing economic anxiety.

And dig I will

And disable the cars.

And disable the cars' fuel cells.

And Disappointment Boulevard

And do the voices.

And don't get me started on Young Sheldon.

And don't just say "points."

And don't lean the same way I do

And don't tell anybody I said that.

And don't worry about buckling up

And don't you dare give me a letter grade.

And done.

And easy on the leash.

And enjoy Swedish Fish candy.

And envision the blood. What color is it?

And even if I was, I'd have been pushing a plow.

And everything will be Nietzsche keen.

And fall 15 feet to the street.

And Fiona Adams Apple.

And focus on anything good about it.

And for Hanukkah?

And forbidden from using the letters N, B, and C

And FORD. We go further, so you can.

And FORD. We go further, so you can.

And found beauty at its core.

And get rid of all this silverware.

And give all your information to the FBI.

And give him what he dreams of.

And go to games with him.

And Godzilla's cousin, Sheldon Godzilla.

And guess what, you laughed! It was funny.

And having your friends see you melt down on TV?

And he figured he'd just use it to pay his tab.

And he inspired me in school.

And he was slightly less fat than he was going to be.

And he will never leave my kitchen.

And he's a clown with class"?

And here's Marge with the actress who played her.

And hid it in another contestant's luggage.

And his HitForm, InstaBox, Gibtrack, Buzuba,

And hit "I'm" a little harder

And how 'bout you, Chief Wiggum?

And how would you have played the Three Legged Chase?

And I am telling you,

And I am, too.

And I appreciate your support.

And I can't take it

And I caught an octopus on Main Street. What a day.

And I direct traffic

And I don't care how much golden time they have to pay us

And I don't like anybody telling me what to do.

And I gave notes which were ignored.

And I go to sleep now, waking up in the middle of the night,

And I got demoted from stripper to topless valet.

And I got lost.

And I had an idea, an idea for something

And I have a sister, too.

And I have strong doubts about The Incredibles

And I just want one other smart thing in this house

And I know you're just gonna respond with a,

And I love that I drove you to violence.

And I love the way you just made me feel safer.

And I love you,

And I make losers happen.

And I promise you, I will coach him as hard as I can.

And I saw a circus do a Beatles tribute without permission

And I take it as flattery.

And I think you should see something.

And I vow on my life

And I was dipping shrimp with all the big talents

And I was gonna live through them.

And I was in a celebratin' mood.

And I wasted high school learning German.

And I will now give you both.

And I won

And I won't bother you again.

And I won't let you do this to Him

And I wrote a popular off Broadway musical.

And I, drawn by the farcical premise,

And I'd like to thank the Academy of Arts

And I'll field this call from Grampa.

And I'll give you this substitution bear doll.

And I'll never forget the way you and...

And I'll never leave you.

And I'll pour the tea.

And I'll see what works in editing. (chuckles)

And I'll write you a tragedy"?

And I'm (bleating): ba a ack.

And I'm for storing bread.

And I'm going to tell you a very long joke.

And I'm gonna tell the whole world

And I'm I'm woke as hell.

And I'm not playing a dog, either

And I'm not thanking the Georgia Film Commission,

And I'm optimistic about our future.

And I'm still doing it!

And I'm the chaplain.

And I'm the king of lame.

And I'm your niece.

And I've been on both sides of that one.

And I've got a sister who will edit them together

And if only you had played either one of them!

And if Ralph asks you to give him a bath,

And if so, where are those bones?

And if there's one thing you don't want to aggravate,

And if they doubt you, viciously attack their character.

And if they lost their snowshoe,

And if you accept the word of the Lord that's me

And if you let them in, there are a few mistakes

And if you play the way I know you're capable of,

And it tells you what's in your heart.

And it was such a good date night.

And it's a half hour farther from everywhere.

And it's so exciting.

And it's the third thing someone pitched

And just for the night,

And just like that, Lisa's dream

And just look at the wrinklin.

And just what did you say I was?

And knock over all the crows. (laughs)

And launched it as a digital platform

And lay out some mixed nuts. We've got guests.

And let me just ask this. Is it possible

And let me say, no one enables

And let the light between me and Homer give life to our universe.

And listened to the director commentaries.

And look what I hid in the apple.

And Maggie, too.

And mailing in our mortgage payment on time.

And make it snappy, Blobba the Hutt.

And make sure you don't have any more kids.

And making Marge your partner.

And Marge draws first fruit.

And Matt Lauer on the Today Show.

And may I say, you put the "ja" in "jawohl!" (chuckles)

And maybe he rubbed it in a little.

And Montgomery Burns fires his female employees.

And more resentful looks from the baby.

And movie people in the same room.

And my bulbs. Ow, ow, ow. Hot, hot, hot.

And my family knows I don't want it stained.

And my sales pitch strongly implied that wouldn't happen

And my wife needs a seat as well.

And never again will I listen to a doctor.

And never cared about making anything good ever again.

And never saw them in temple again.

And never wases to do everything else.

And no state sales tax! Boo yeah!

And none of the other clowns will do it

And not get tased by security. (laughs)

And now I'm here to introduce the new Myphone Ultima,

And now the bad recap.

And now the jade tree,

And now the signing

And now the whole world will joke about

And now we get ice cream

And now we pray.

And now we're gonna party like it's 5799.

And now, if you'll excuse me,

And off the suspect list.

And on House Hunters International,

And once again, the true monster, the soulless CEO,

And once I finish, it's over forever.

And one that didn't aim too high.

And paying for credit card debt with worse credit card debt,

And people always feel so sorry for you.

And please tell your sister she's pretty.

And poof.

And practice in Swedish policy.

And Promise Keepers.

And put on an obscene amount of weight.

And recalibrate.

And release the hounds.

And rinfrescante come la brezza del lago di Como

And rumor has it, out of drag,

And say they're therapy pets?

And saying what parts we're playing

And saying you brushed your teeth makes it true.

And Scene Blow

And see if he can find his way back.

And see what happens.

And sent 'em off to school.

And she no longer believed in God.

And she said, "Chillin'. You know, maxin' and relaxin'."

And she understands what's going on.

And so I say to you, in the words of Miss Lillian Gish,

And somehow you've driven over yourself. Amazing.

And sometimes I forget your birth anniversary,

And sports scores while I'm at church!

And stop calling the sofa a love seat!

And stop.

And stuffing at Halloween

And swing your foot in a circle and keep winking?

And technically, it's "cacti."

And tell that general your platoon's been wiped out,

And tell them the, uh... the good news.

And thank you for reminding me why I never had kids.

And thank you, Georgia Film Commission,

And that part is my body and my head.

And that was the start of American Airlines.

And that's it

And that's why I'm wearing this mustache till I'm just ash.

And that's why they fought so much.

And the angels talk to each other like this:

And the answer is... army men

And the brave souls who rise above it.

And the cars are disabled.

And the consciously evil prefer fracking

And the cosmos is indifferent to us all

And the crew gift is just a T shirt.

And the diamonite mine he planted in the dragon turds

And the entire Garbage Blast media family.

And the Evergreen Terrors have a narrow lead

And the fact that everything else is better.

And the fact that you would even ask how I felt

And the great thing about boys is

And the Guffer Brothers

And the investigation stalled,

And the licking of the deodorant sticks.

And the little slide of glass.

And the mayor's wife has fleas

And the number one new wedding trend is...

And the Odyssey there, yeah

And the only snacks are celery sticks.

And the other half getting down

And the other two get the worst kind of squat: diddly

And the other will fail and have a horrible life

And the reference only I understand.

And the studio hired the least qualified crew

And the winner for Outstanding Lead Performance

And the wrinkles to match.

And then the wind whispers, "Why?"

And then what's the group after that?

And then you did and you loved it!

And then, last night, my dreams were in French!

And then, of course,

And then...

And there it is

And there won't be any rice to save it.

And there's no applause sign.

And there's no more brain powder.

And therefore made me realize how selfish Homer is.

And they check the trash, believe me.

And they said, if it can't reach its own food,

And they stomped on people.

And they take off the second week for Easter.

And they weren't afraid to choke a kid or two.

And this baton will pop it right out.

And this for a rainy day.

And this GL50 9K Smart TV only $499.99

And this is how I find out, huh? By you telling me in person?

And this is how I find out?

And this is my stop!

And this is Nick.

And this is where you sweep up the elephant crap.

And this just in: asbestos is back

And this one's for the youth market.

And this ugly duckling conduct Swan Lake.

And those are just the ones you can hear.

And turns off when I leave.

And TV show Armenian Idol.

And vice versa.

And voilà a Marge tini!

And watch dopey movies on demand while they keep us quiet

And watch the TV channel that's about the hotel

And watch The Weather Channel.

And we are gonna discuss it.

And we are waiting on one very special guest.

And we can still be friends

And we don't have a lot of things.

And we'll back you up with Sophie and Milhouse.

And we'll have a long, long talk.

And we'll make a Netflix documentary.

And we'll turn off the TV the second

And we're gonna drop all the original Itchy & Scratchys

And we're the witnesses.

And we've got a storage bin full of tears.

And we've got to go. Back home.

And welcome to Thunderdome.

And went to heaven.

And what hurts the most is that I can't imagine

And what I'm having for dinne.

And what the sea used to look like.

And what were you going to give her?

And when I take on a challenge, I don't quit!

And when it ends, it's another thing she'll blame you for

And when she's kidding herself,

And when she's turning a blind eye.

And where is this other kid?

And where's Bart?

And which is free to you?

And who are you two?

And why are you here?

And wonder where I am.

And work nights at the plant.

And work there as a janitor.

And work there as a janitor.

And worse and worse and worse.

And worse, you betrayed your own wang

And wrap it up by getting decapitated by a Frisbee.

And YergaPunch streams.

And you also won... a day with Krusty!

And you always catch a home run.

And you can't stop us.

And you forgot to get a parking pass. Heh.

And you got a miniature horse?

And you haven't paid any attention to me at all.

And you know what it does, then that is not the co ah.

And you know who's the worst is that white faced Judas: Krusty

And you live where I live.

And you may consider the charges dropped.

And you remembered all your lines.

And you returned with the Orville!

And you wanted to go dancing.

And you were gonna bring the edibles for the wrap party.

And you wound up at Moe's. Well, fancy that.

And you, y you're just a mercenary.

And you'll never have exhaust this toxic.

And you'll never see him again

And you'll see it's so much more.

And your bad driving record is a big, big plus.

And your Equal Employment Opportunity Commission bones

And your mother?

And your pranks are next level.

And, Carl, do you think your character Ike Skidmore

And, Dad, you can just go by Bob Number Two,

And, dare I say, pwned?

And, for residents of Georgia, the death penalty

And, if the kids misbehave,

And, of course, our incredible star, Sideshow Mel.

And, of course, what the studio wanted most was a sequel

And, oh, boy, I'm sorry to say this, but, uh...

And, uh, like that.

And... (clicks tongue) what were you drinking there, Cheryl?

And... action!

And... cut.

And... cut.

And... open

Annie Leibovitz is taking your portrait

ANNOUNCER (on TV): Tonight, cabbage.

ANNOUNCER (speed talking): Day with Krusty will actually be

ANNOUNCER: Do you like adventure, bandanas

ANNOUNCER: Forgot your toothbrush? No problem.

ANNOUNCER: Here at Geriatric Park, we combine

ANNOUNCER: It's Sprawl Mart's huge Black Friday sale.

ANNOUNCER: Supplies are limited,

ANNOUNCER: The Arts and Incarceration Channel presents...

ANNOUNCER: The match is canceled. No refunds.

ANNOUNCER: We're in the late game,

Annoyed grunt, annoyed grunt!

Another all girl Itchy & Scratchy ever again.

Another couple in trouble.

Another kid took it, never gave it back.

Another law you're breaking.

Another night at Moe's?

Answered a lot of questions but raised a lot more.

Antoine, check this out.

Any inaccuracies or blatant lies?

Any Joe Billionaire can have a Fabergé egg.

Any kid could ask for:

Any less than three stars and, uh... (makes cutting sound)

Any other religious beliefs are founded on myths?

Anyone need a vacuum?

Anything for you, Dad.

Anything more encouraging than a pumpkin sticker

Anything.

Anytime you find yourself wanting to hug Mrs

Anyway, I'm gonna go work for my uncle. He owns a tile store

Anyway, this is where you eat, this is where you sleep,

Anywhere a grown man would expect privacy.

Apparently, some of the girls at school were...

Applaud or die.

Are lower than the year before.

Are never going to see me humiliated like this

Are part of much larger conglomerates

Are the ones that work there.

Are the real time killers.

Are these macaroons free range?

Are ye ready for a trip to the Scottish Die lands?

Are you familiar with the USA Network?

Are you from the Highlands?

Are you giving your precious child

Are you going to tell me

Are you gonna answer?

Are you gonna give me anything else?

Are you guys awake?

Are you happy now? Because...

Are you kicking me out?

Are you kids ready to turn this thing you like

Are you nuts?

Are you really French?

Are you saying I'm dead? Put up your dukes.

Are you saying I'm off the hook?

Are you sure about this?

Are you sure these are safe here?

Are you sure we're at the right school?

Are you sure you didn't play the blues

Are you sure you're not Hillary?

Are you sure?

Are you sure?

Are you sure? Do you really?

Are you sure? I'm pretty heavy.

Are you telling the truth?

Are you winning?

Aren't we a power company?

Aren't you forgetting something?

Aren't you going to chuckle?

Aretha Franklin, Eleanor Roosevelt,

As "dolphining."

As a help to me, when you're acting,

As a public school music teacher.

As an American, I'd like to apologize

As easy as 1 2 3.

As for you, I am not budging.

As good of a father as I should.

As I push my palm into your back,

As in ketamine.

As male or female, but it is cool that they're girls now.

As many of the stops should have been left in. D plus.

As masked pranksters calling themselves "Bossy Riot,"

As much as you do now.

As Peabo Bryson sings the theme song over the credits.

As production assistants.

As suspicion focused on one man.

As you may have heard, there's been an amicable parting of ways

Aside from thinking our church has confession.

Ask anyone: our lawyers, our attorneys, anyone.

At 100% of the shots you don't take.

At dinner tonight, I don't want you to be somebody you aren't.

At least, I think it was you.

At Lover's Lagoon.

At my last wedding I wrote "I do"

At the beep, you know what to do.

At the cereal bar, you can request nothing but prizes.

At the corner of Good But Not Great

At the end of a great book,

At the last second, we're planning at the last minute.

At the Laugh Basement in Tampa...

At the nearest Second Best Western Motel.

At the time of the crime?

At the workplace.

At this swipe rag.

Atheists?

Attention, everyone, gather by the bowl of mini yogurts

ATTICUS (on TV): Well, I think that's all the reading

Au revoir jusqu'à la prochaine fois,