Modern Family (2009) - Season 7 Edit

A blown mind because we have two of them. (chuckles)

A boy was very bad, and his parents locked him in this secret room

A chance to talk to one of us alone, some muffins.

A Christian rock band.

A cloud of mist?

A clown.

A college student is visiting a friend, and they're buying beer!

A couple of years ago, huh?

A coupon for a fun day with the three of us.

A damn tree's blocking the street.

A daughter mocking her father's life.

A death row inmate requested it for his last meal.

A desire never to repeat himself.

A double shot half caff caramel macchiato

A few weeks ago, I found a nest of duck eggs.

A few weeks ago, we caught him with beer.

A fruity beaujolais then.

A fully plumbed stand alone dwelling on your property.

A funny skit thing after all the names.

A leader leads, not reads.

A life where I don't have to worry about her.

A little bit sometimes.

A little less stabby?

A little revealing.

A little too much nothing, if you ask me.

A little, but Thank you!

A little...me?

A lot like our blinds division.

A lot of cool storage solutions coming out of Asia, huh?

A lot of girls would have tried to look sexy to show him what he's missing.

A lot of things would have been nice.

A lot of unanswered questions here, it seems like.

A Maserati?

A million things going on right now.

A particleboard closet they want to hang themselves.

A person is not a sammich, Joe!

A playdate for Joe.

A promposal? To who? Laurie Vock?

A special relationship with her.

A squirrel eating a band aid.

A teenage boy is ever like that.

A Theodore durkas.

A thousand thank yous.

A three day "Welcome Home" party.

A tiny but noticeable red mark on his neck?

A Titans of Industry award.

A whole group thing by the pool.

A woman doesn't compliment a man on his hat

A work ethic and a right arm like Popeye.

A working lighthouse? Yes, it is working.

A.K.A. your worst nightmare.

Aaah! [ Grunts ]

Aaah! Ohh!

Aaah. So, other than lily,

Aah, this is devastating.

Aah!

Aah!

Aah! I can't watch! The stress is murder on my tummy.

Aah! I'm good!

Aah! What are you doing here?

About a bowl of green apples.

About a love letter that arrived 30 years late

About a woman.

About anyone she met at a party with an open bar.

About having pizza for dinner.

About how we were gonna spend the evening.

About me not needing new friends.

About not talking to Chelsea.

About some of Joe's lesser artwork.

About the, uh, dust ruffle?

About what drives me.

About what? Tell me.

About your seating arrangements? Why? Where am I sitting?

Absolutely.

According to the Internet, they were ready a month ago.

Actually more your dead daughter's day. May she rest in peace.

Actually, better.

Actually, he's fielding a few job offers right now,

Actually, I I could use, like, $20.

Actually, I think I, uh I twisted my ankle

Actually, I'm glad I'm running into you like this.

Actually, I'm waiting for Sarah,

Actually, it's just one clown.

Actually, no. This is a personnel file.

Actually, that is a cashmere throw,

Actually, that's the worst thing you can do.

Actually, there's an emergency valve.

Actually, they do. Wait a minute!

Actually, um, if if you don't mind,

Actually, we're stopping,

Actually, what's even more embarrassing

Actually, you kind of helped me out.

Actually...

Adam and Michael last weekend and Felix and Jordan...

Adiós, amigo.

Adjudicate?

Admit it!

Admit it. You have a crush on him.

Adopted various alter egos to spice up our marriage.

Adorable. I know.

Afraid of being punished by their mommies.

After 10 years of paralyzing writer's block,

After a good day's work.

After a while, I stopped hanging out with my dad at the store.

After all, you are the smartest people I know.

After buying whatever they're selling,

After Delgado's performance, I expect he'll go on

After I gave him the fossil, he gave me this

After I grabbed it, I had time to return some e mails.

After my junior year,

After our elders give us their blessings.

After that brutal review of you in "Sound of Music."

After that, big ears' parents and I

After the success of our royal renaissance series,

After you've built pyramids out of man.

Again!

Again?

Again?

Again? Yes, again.

Again? You have a problem.

Agendas they're crutches. They're for the weak.

Ah, do you guys know where the bathroom is?

Ah, I didn't know you painted.

Ah, I used to.

Ah, I'm not showing any skin 'cause I don't want to tempt you.

Ah, it'll probably blow over.

Ah, so, this is the house

Ah, there's something so relaxing

Ah, yes. That sounds very nice.

Ah!

Ah.

Ah.

Ah. Great.

Aha. Peanut brittle. Could this day get any better?

Ahh! This is gonna be so much fun!

Ahh.

Alex Dunphy, would you make me the happiest cat in school

Alex probably asked Haley to borrow them,

Alex texted when you were in that staff meeting.

Alex, did you know I was struck by lightning?

Alex, don't get mad.

Alex, honey, your last class tomorrow is at 10:00 A.M.,

Alex, I know you said not to call

Alex, I'm fine.

Alex, nobody needs your sarcasm right now.

Alex, stop being the Grinch.

Alex, why are you home?

Alex, you got this.

Alex: Again, mom?

Alex: And especially today.

ALEX: Guns N' Roses.

Alex: Well, I'm off.

All clear, party people!

All clear.

All clear.

All I can say is "Doe a dear Lord, make it stop.

All I had to do was wait for Jay to fall asleep. Genius.

All I wanted was a white Christmas.

All I wanted was to bribe my way into that fancy school

All in on one number.

All is well on my side of the street.

All of a sudden, cam is calling it "our sauce"?

All of it, or just the "F" word?

All of our friends would pick you,

All of our work is gone!

All of this stuff is packed with meaning.

All of those lock box combinations. [ Camera shutter clicking ]

All our junk is out!

All right, buddy. Good to see you.

All right, come on.

All right, cool.

All right, everybody. On your feet.

All right, get out of here. Happy motoring.

All right, Gus. Up, up and away.

All right, guys. Let's do this.

All right, here's something.

All right, I got it.

All right, I'm starting to lose feeling.

All right, kiddo.

All right, let's do this!

All right, let's get a little funk in here, ladies!

All right, let's just go home. I mean, it's hot, there's no Wi Fi.

All right, now, come on. Let's get back on track.

All right, now, I'm gonna go make some cocktails,

All right, team. Look alive.

All right, the dove cannon's loaded,

All right, we need a game plan here.

All right, we're down by three, but that's okay.

All right, what what if I said, "I miss milkmen"?

All right, who's ready for my famous chicken salad?

All right, you guys should head out.

All right? People are just drawn to you.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right. [ Sighs ]

All right. Come on. Get on your bike.

All right. Just so you know, I completely kept my cool through that whole thing.

All right. Let's do this.

All right. Mmm. Happy fourth.

All right. My hand saw is in the garage.

All right. Once Sophie boards the bus,

All right. One hose in the pool, the other one

All right. See you in a minute.

All right. That's it. Go get your ducks. Go.

All right. These contracts are good to go.

All right. Uh, Lily, let's let's get on the bike.

All set, here, Jay! Working like a charm!

All that's left is the inspection.

All the freshmen jump off a high dive

All the junk wants to come out of the drawer. Can you feel it?

All the memories came flooding back.

All the way from the front to the back, kill the ambassador,

All the work that we lost on the computer this morning, so...

All these errands I have to do for my boss.

All these men here gave up their football today.

All they wanted to do was horse around, so...

All this closet stuff is driving me nuts.

All those typos from your stubby fingers.

All we're saying is give Reece a chance.

All you can do is wait for days like that to be over...

All you want to do is go home to the comfort of your family.

ALL: Ashley W.'s coming!

ALL: Bye, Beth.

All: Hola! Hola! Hola!

All: Whoo!

All's I'm saying is, if you're lucky enough to get this boy Ryan you like,

Alligators?

Alone, pay per view boxing

Already scheduled it.

Already? We missed the whole thing!

Also a great interview with amateur conductor

Also in the Rolodex! Also in the Rolodex!

Also, am I the only one that sees

Also, Dad, we're hoping to keep the princess theme alive,

Also, every time you open your mouth,

Also, I I had a a a wand.

Also, they're trapped, which is nice.

Also, we were kind of hoping

Although it is a little offensive

Although that party crashing apple slice turned out to be a welcome plus one.

Although we still don't have an explanation

Always pitching me their closet ideas.

Am I doing it right?

Am I right?

Am I screaming right now?

Am I squishing your legs? No, I meant in our relationship.

Amen. Amen.

America needs to feel good again, Gloria.

An actual career all because of a girl?

An elite public school 12 miles outside of your district.

An unlikely duo thrust together.

And [ Laughs ] And somehow I let you

And And don't get me wrong

And and we wanted to play with them, too.

And oh, my God. What?

And you cannot imagine the sense of contentment.

And 45 minutes till this kicks in.

And a crisp Chardonnay. [ Chuckles ]

And a dash of black pepper! (gasps)

And a hobby.

And a horse once kicked me into an electric fence.

And a little less, you know...

And a one and a two.

And a pony that escaped from the riding circle, yeah.

And add a little extra tension to our marriage.

And admit you were wrong?

And all for what? Closets.

And all Gloria ever does is yell at my dad.

And all his matching luggage is gone.

And all of a sudden, you pulled it out of your back pocket.

And almost got my nose broken by a football.

And also, am I on my way

And also, there's something else.

And another thing

And anyways, I don't have the key ingredient

And as a thank you, they sent me a free weekend for two.

And as much as I have tried to stay positive like you all day,

And ask her did she get your damn love letter.

And ask him some questions, like, "So, do you have any hobbies?"

And ask yourself that question.

And asked him if they were coming,

And at 7:00, silently toast the fallen.

And at this point, I'm mostly body spray.

And because I was the oldest girl

And before we knew it, we were actually doing it for real.

And being right is so important?

And besides, Mitchell, before you know it,

And best friend, Earl Chambers,

And body shame him if you like.

And boom, our next promotional giveaway.

And both parents are coming, so you have to be here.

And brought to you by Ford. We go further, so you can.

And brought to you by Ford. We go further, so you can.

And brought to you by Ford. We go further, so you can.

And building them a little bird circus?

And cam hangs out with them a lot.

And Cam's sister is the worst influence on Lily.

And changed the life of two women.

And coincidentally, it's take your daughter to work day.

And commute to school next semester.

And crank the a/c full blast, hmm?

And D equals .00214, so th

And do you have any Cohiba Robustos?

And don't give me that business about bonding,

And don't worry. Take all the time you need.

And dotted her "I" with a little heart?

And drove the golf cart off the little bridge into the lake.

And dry ice so Manny can appear in a cloud of mist.

And ducks that haven't hatched in a month might never.

And Elizabeth Vargas had to almost sacrifice a squirrel?

And enough.

And even if it had,

And even then, there's a significant waiting list.

And everyone in the world are moving forward,

And explode all over Luke and me.

And feel the burn at the same time.

And figure out why that brown spot won't stop growing.

And fish like I do to Manny.

And follow it around as a way to find food.

And for two weeks, Cam has allergy induced sleep apnea

And France was just beautiful.

And get a haircut. Okay.

And get angry again.

And get arrested.

And get out of there before it got awkward.

And give them a couple "attaboys," huh?

And grabbed that kid,

And has access to a bunch of empty houses

And has to use an apparatus in order to help him breathe.

And having people think that you did it for the life insurance payout.

And he always gets us amazing presents.

And he decided to go golfing.

And he flies his own helicopter.

And he has to shave almost every two weeks.

And he never would have declared his undying love for me.

And he'll be eaten alive by chickens.

And he's acting a little cold.

And he's losing his mind!

And he's running into problems

And he's self conscious about his body.

And he's the poor boy duct taping his shoes

And here I am.

And his wife, Claire.

And hope you wake up to a better tomorrow.

And how are we supposed to find the Alex duck?

And I am dealing with corporate espionage.

And I am freaking out.

And I can't believe I'm finally going to prom.

And I can't go into the office covered in flaxseed.

And I can't have the two of you sleeping together

And I could see when she opened the door

And I defy any child to not be delighted by that!

And I didn't spoon feed them the answers.

And I don't have time to be picking up after you every two minutes.

And I don't really appreciate anything else you're implying,

And I feel like I have to say something.

And I found something that really helped me

And I got a text saying it was finally happening.

And I got her uniform pressed because I love my country.

And I got one.

And I got stung by a bee.

And I guess I was so mellowed out

And I guess pyramids of oranges don't seem so great

And I have a friend here that would like

And I have a plan to get it back.

And I have been crazy with work, which means

And I haven't been Sherman since I got on that bus in Lubbock 35 years ago.

And I haven't seen feet that fast since riverdance.

And I hired the dalai lama for a pool party.

And I I appreciate any time I can get with you.

And I just completely lost it. [ Phil giggles ]

And I just love hanging out with you guys.

And I just read about this new nail Polish that changes colors

And I just... I want her to be safe.

And I know I sound like a stalker,

And I know you'd never admit it, but you're scared.

And I know you're gonna achieve great things in this world,

And I licked it right off the remote.

And I like that Phil wants to move past this, so...

And I live every day in constant fear

And I love you for having it.

And I may have accidentally seen...

And I mean everyone. (camera shutter clicks)

And I miss you every day.

And I need to feel like a man.

And I need your help, Claire.

And I prefer brunettes, without beards.

And I promise I will never side with anyone else ever again.

And I realized I could use Joe's by the numbers cuteness

And I report to no one.

And I said, "why? Does he get angry,

And I see where that takes me.

And I shall mete out punishment as

And I sort of um, uh... Oh, gosh.

And I think I embarrassed myself enough for one day.

And I think you should nip this friendship in the bud.

And I thought maybe we could

And I thought my dad was embarrassing. Shut up.

And I thought that I was FaceTiming with my grandmother.

And I threw it at his head.

And I was gonna call you.

And I was sitting next to a guy using a typewriter.

And I was the only one with the decency to tell him.

And I was thinking maybe you could pick up both of ours?

And I was thinking that

And I was very sad because

And I was worried you seeing all these marriages collapse

And I wasn't all that happy to be at food town,

And I wasn't gonna get dressed in the dark, so...

And I will be getting my coat... Claire,

And I will use the hose in the backyard.

And I won't ask you to, Jay.

And I would love you and respect you more.

And I would play the role of everyone else.

And I would say, "like when?"

And I would say, "that's so mean, Jay pritchett!"

And I'd be the one who's left behind.

And I'll be back in a couple of weeks.

And I'll have that same picture

And I'll just hover after her like a little puppy dog.

And I'll say this again she doesn't want to do this!

And I'll see you in front of the hair salon.

And I'll send an excuse e mail from your mom's computer.

And I'm actually cheating on him too.

And I'm crushing it on the Internet.

And I'm embracing a romantic style of travel.

And I'm going to make him hurt.

And I'm going to tell him he can't treat me this way.

And I'm gonna do it.

And I'm gonna go register my new firm right now.

And I'm gonna storm out, too,

And I'm having second thoughts about this plan, dad.

And I'm just trying to protect our family.

And I'm meeting my buddies.

And I'm really worried someone's gonna steal my snacks.

And I'm sorry if I don't say it more.

And I'm trying to get the stores to sell them.

And I'm worried it's going to look disrespectful if Rob wears shorts.

And I've I'm separated from the guys.

And I've always been sauce competitive...

And I've asked you so many times that when you ignore me,

And I've been chased into a lake.

And if I hadn't opened my big, fat mouth,

And if I were hosting an event,

And if I'm being honest,

And if it's melting, so what?

And if not, too bad. I'm in Juárez!

And if Reuben were just a little bit older and didn't wear prescription shoes

And if she didn't care, she wouldn't be this upset.

And if someone like you can be human,

And if that's the case, he's not at the coup,

And if the ambassador is still alive,

And if there's any monkey business,

And if this helps you in any way,

And if you don't like her husband, maybe she'll stop liking me.

And if you were ever truly my friend, you'll understand.

And if you were wondering

And in 10 minutes, we'll have peppers in hand.

And inside I found latex gloves, a bottle of bleach,

And instead put it in terms of how we feel. Okay.

And instead, I'm back in Colombia

And it can't even last one day in this house?!

And it gives Mom a chance to see how well this state of the art smoke alarm works!

And it goes something like this.

And it was so fun. That's why I was screaming.

And it was your stye medication I was picking up.

And it won't be love.

And it'll be a lot trickier now that she's fully awake.

And it's been...Great.

And it's j'Marcus. Damn it.

And it's not like we don't have

And it's overwhelming here.

And it's so cute how your hair never moves. Like a LEGO.

And it's so easy.

And it's straight to voicemail.

And Jane got me out of a similar situation in the '80s.

And Jay's just sort of the master

And Joe crying when he's sad.

And Joe is very excited about it.

And just grabbed the first thing that he s

And just juggling for 30.

And just so you know ooh!

And keep going.

And left him here forever.

And let him know

And let you accuse me of stealing all of those papers!

And lily's at a sleepover. Mm hmm.

And listen to that sweet voice.

And look at this moment, we would say,

And make you feel bad when you throw them out.

And making it worse and worse.

And maybe a few weeks away from me will do some good.

And Mayor Pudding would do anything to stay in office.

And my brother once tried to take his pants off over his head.

And my cousin can't send me more from Colombia until next week.

And my cousin needs someone, like like, now.

And my tongue froze to his cheek.

And my wallet and cellphone were in there.

And needs to be calmed down by the white people.

And neither would you.

And no, I haven't changed my mind.

And nobody knows about it.

And nobody seems to care.

And not barf on my dad's old church shirt.

And not be seen?

And not tell me where it is?

And not the toxic amount of sodium.

And not to write the book for you,

And not what might be good for you.

And now I call Tommy "big ears."

And now I'm worried

And now Manny and Joe will, too.

And now she bans me from giving a toast,

And now she doesn't like me.

And now she's trying to protect herself.

And now she's walking into that liquor store.

And now that gays are legal or whatever,

And now that I've stopped,

And now the pool's a centimeter

And now these miracle shears are no good.

And now this?

And now we're down to three phones.

And now we're out.

And one day, during the big club tournament,

And out they flew, leaving us with nothing but an empty

And over a hundred thousand hanger rods installed,

And overcoming adversity,

And perspective and and color.

And Phil was in the bathtub with all the ducks,

And poor guy has a son who's not quite right.

And pretend it was in the Bible. Hmm.

And probably bird flu.

And pull up your pants!

And put you into a cologne, you know what I'd call it?

And raced to the beach to stop his proposal.

And Raymond got all the confidence

And ready to focus.

And remember, it's all about the strength of the nestle.

And rode straight to my grandpa's.

And ruin the whole night. Come on, lily.

And set him free.

And she didn't want to hurt our feelings.

And she started chopping the cilantro really loud

And she's got a hot roommate for you.

And she's staying in a hotel in town

And she's the only woman in the anti bullying campaign

And show me what those bad men were doing to me at the store.

And shredded them to pieces in a justifiable rage.

And six weeks later, I'm watching the show.

And sneak around behind my back.

And some of my own first year insecurities bubbled up.

And some stuff I need Phil to stop wearing.

And somehow, it wouldn't fall.

And someone spent all the cash we had in the car.

And someone's gonna call.

And sometimes we can give off a negative vibe without meaning to.

And sometimes, when you have sauces from

And spare him the pain I felt

And speaking of two dimensional women

And spend a weekend in the Eternal City. Rome.

And started his own company on a day that is now known

And still feeling sad about Sanjay breaking up with me.

And summers off.

And swing by prom with me?

And take a scootch to your right.

And take it out on one another.

And takes stock of the battle at night?!

And tell me if I'm just being crazy?

And tell you that you're not doing your job?

And that if you were gonna hand over the reins to somebody,

And that is always sexy.

And that master bathtub alone has been in four rap videos

And that ruffles feathers.

And that works because that frees up warehouse two.

And that you'll get on a plane.

And that's a good way to get stepped on.

And that's before Luke even gets in it.

And that's not a bad thing.

And that's not why I want her to take the job.

And that's why I'm stuck here on a Sunday afternoon for 80 bucks.

And the afternoon in Portland.

And the answer's obvious.

And the best table at ClosetCon.

And the other children made fun of me, Mitchell. Okay.

And the place upstairs is gonna be a rental gold mine

And the two of you have been conspicuously silent.

And the video obviously doesn't capture my essence.

And the waiters all wear socks.

And the whole floor vibrates

And the, uh the other one.

And their slightly cleaner seats.

And then apart and then together

And then apart and then turned down by the marines

And then had a panic attack in a hall of mirrors,

And then he hands the Mike to me.

And then I find Beth's uniform?

And then I get uncomfortable,

And then I got some more awful news.

And then I would say, "how about if..."

And then keep the right elbow in front of the body as you swing up.

And then no one would sit with me.

And then one day

And then other times, it's just best

And then pretend to hate the attention.

And then pull out of the dive? Uh huh.

And then suddenly, one day, something clicked and I was in.

And then they're supposed to decorate the locker,

And then together.

And then tomorrow morning,

And then we bounce.

And then we don't have to go to anything for a whole year.

And then we go to the game.

And then we start pedaling.

And then we were apart. [ Whirring ]

And then we were gonna fight because of separation anxiety,

And then we're gonna watch a movie

And then when he got home, he barely noticed what I made.

And then when that sun goes down... Mm hmm.

And then when the lights go out, she'll be able to read

And then when they were in here by themselves,

And then when you land in Paris,

And then you said you wanted some role playing fun...

And then you see who can throw theirs the furthest.

And then you would say,

And then you would say, "is never an option?"

And then, right before dessert, you sit down at the piano.

And then, uh, by some...sick fluke,

And there is only one reason

And there it is.

And there it was. The ultimate teachable moment.

And there's just so much pressure

And there's no getting rid of it.

And there's no solid food.

And there's something very wrong with people who can.

And they have an army of lawyers

And they said that a mean boy made fun of you.

And they say by the end of the semester,

And they still haven't hatched.

And they tend to follow the common theme

And they think we're friends with guys like tommy cutahee.

And they validate parking.

And they'd been together almost as long as we have.

And they're all lame.

And they're both single, fellas.

And they're never gonna believe any of our excuses

And things have been pretty emotional

And this hockey puck's coming at me with tired insults.

And this insecurity is a part of me that I do not love.

And this is the Johnsons' offer, all set for signatures.

And this isn't.

And this sexy, sexy house.

And this shawl collar's got more wrinkles

And threw a party.

And to allow other people to express theirs.

And to his six rescue beagles, he

And to think of all the weekends I worked and the family vacations we put off,

And to think we invited you into our home.

And to try and get on "the price is right."

And told her that Andy liked her.

And under the right circumstances,

And violated the trust between me, my clients,

And walk around with them on their shoulders

And was a good 15 years younger than you oh.

And watch little girls playing soccer

And we and what, Claire?

And we all have to be there.

And we always tend to go smaller, don't we?

And we are donating it along with the rest of this junk.

And we are not keeping him.

And we choose them because they manifest the qualities we wish we had.

And we do have a little extra time on our hands...

And we don't have enough money to get home.

And we got four pallets of hinges from Taiwan

And we had a little backyard party planned.

And we had different ideas

And we had no power.

And we have taken up enough of his time.

And we haven't got much time.

And we know how much you love Barbra Streisand.

And we met Tom and Lisa Delaney.

And we pray for Dex.

And we send the photo to Earl.

And we totally flaked.

And we were able to move forward.

And we will debut it at the cabin

And we'd never have to do it.

And we're fighting about it.

And we're going to relieve you of your command.

And we're moving backward.

And we're out.

And we're running out of time.

And we're selling it at the farmers' market.

And we're singing "Silent Night."

And what a lucky mistake. In Colombia, we never get to do things like this.

And what kind of life is she gonna have

And when I call out "Rock Star," you will be

And when you nag me constantly,

And whenever you're ready, there and there.

And where's the lucky husband I've been hearing about?

And while I appreciate what might be the rich white mannest

And who am I to discount yours?

And who else would dare to jump

And who needs it?

And wipe down the rabbit hutch.

And with cyril's state of the art gaming system,

And with one mighty twi

And word on the street is

And worst of all, I let myself go.

And yet, I have not seen him reach for the check once.

And you all get to spend more time with yours truly.

And you are too trusting!

And you become the invisible housewife.

And you came to me? Yeah.

And you can barely make it to the couch.

And you can stay home all day long and just play with your kid.

And you could finally learn.

And you decide that that's the perfect moment

And you did break a big rule,

And you didn't do anything?

And you expel that air with large and sudden bursts.

And you go there and throw 'em in his dumb face.

And you got all of it from your mother.

And you had nothing to do with it.

And you have a chance to make him different than those two.

And you have already tried to change the recipe.

And you have to rise above it, so

And you know what it gave me?

And you know what? I think he likes you too.

And you made me look like a fool!

And you make people around you feel comfortable.

And you might have done it on purpose?

And you said, "get the bun."

And you took my lucky stick.

And you turned out all right.

And you won't stop until Cameron is out of the picture.

And you'll be good to go when the movie starts.

And you're gonna get sick of me once the kids leave and you realize how truly crazy I am.

And you're gonna give her the chance to get to know you.

And you're not a daughter.

And you're not okay with that?

And you're probably right. No!

And you're still rocking the sweats.

And you've kept us in business for 22 years.

And your grandson goes to a school with a metal detector.

And your pale slave getup... Not a costume.