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The Office (2005) - Season 3 The Office (2005) – Season 3: The Hilarious Workplace Comedy Continues The Office is a

The Office (2005) - Season 3

The Office (2005) – Season 3: The Hilarious Workplace Comedy Continues

The Office is a critically acclaimed and beloved television show that first premiered in 2005. Season 3 of this mockumentary-style comedy took the already hilarious workplace antics to another level, further cementing the show's status as a fan favorite. Set in Scranton, Pennsylvania, the series follows the daily lives of office employees at Dunder Mifflin Paper Company.

The ensemble cast of The Office (2005) – Season 3 is truly a force to be reckoned with, each member delivering impeccable performances that have become iconic in the comedy genre. The lead character, Michael Scott, is portrayed by the brilliant Steve Carell, who brings a perfect blend of cluelessness, charm, and awkwardness to the role. Rainn Wilson shines as Dwight Schrute, the eccentric and overly serious beet farmer turned salesman. The talented Jenna Fischer plays the sweet and down-to-earth receptionist, Pam Beesly, while John Krasinski portrays Jim Halpert, the charming and mischievous salesman who has an ongoing flirtation with Pam.

Other notable cast members include the talented Ed Helms as the loveable but somewhat obnoxious Andy Bernard, Mindy Kaling as the self-absorbed and ditzy Kelly Kapoor, and Angela Kinsey as the uptight and judgmental Angela Martin. B.J. Novak brings wit and sarcasm to the screen as Ryan Howard, the ambitious temp turned corporate jet-setter. The talented ensemble is rounded out by Phyllis Smith, Kate Flannery, Leslie David Baker, and Brian Baumgartner, among others, who all deliver exceptional performances that contribute to the show's hilarious and relatable dynamics.

In Season 3, The Office continues to expertly blend cringe-worthy moments, dry humor, and heartfelt moments. The comedic timing of the cast is impeccable, and the writing is razor-sharp, creating an unmatched chemistry amongst the actors. The show's documentary-style format adds an extra layer of humor, with characters often breaking the fourth wall, giving the audience a knowing glance or an exaggerated eye-roll. This technique allows viewers to feel like they are part of the office shenanigans, making the show all the more enjoyable and engaging.

The Office, with its brilliantly written characters and witty humor, tackles themes such as love, friendship, office politics, and the mundane aspects of everyday life. The mixture of relatable situations and absurdity keeps audiences laughing while also allowing them to see glimpses of themselves and their own workplaces. The show's expert ability to balance comedy and heart has garnered a loyal and dedicated fanbase, who often find themselves quoting iconic lines and moments from the series.

Whether you are a long-time fan or a newcomer, The Office (2005) – Season 3 is sure to provide an abundance of laughter and entertainment. With its talented ensemble cast, clever writing, and endearing characters, it is no wonder that the show has become a cultural phenomenon. So buckle up, grab some popcorn, and get ready to join the hilarious escapades of the Dunder Mifflin team.

If you're looking to relive the laughter or catch up on any missed episodes, you can easily play and download the sounds from The Office (2005) – Season 3 here. Get those iconic catchphrases and memorable moments at your fingertips, ready to bring joy to your day whenever you need it. Enjoy!
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A boss' salary isn't just about money.
A boss' salary isn't just about money.
A G.A.I. A gay.
A G.A.I. A gay.
A G.N.O. If you will. A gno.
A G.N.O. If you will. A gno.
A good worker and a good man.
A good worker and a good man.
A lot better than hers, that's for sure.
A lot better than hers, that's for sure.
A lot more work and I need a raise.
A lot more work and I need a raise.
A lot? Too much.
A lot? Too much.
About being in the driver's seat.
About being in the driver's seat.
Absolutely correct. Later, Jim.
Absolutely correct. Later, Jim.
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not. I'm on it.
Absolutely not. I'm on it.
Absolutely. What did I say?
Absolutely. What did I say?
Accepted.
Accepted.
Action.
Action.
Actually, it's more of a guys' afternoon in.
Actually, it's more of a guys' afternoon in.
After you kissed me.
After you kissed me.
Agoraphobic? Yeah.
Agoraphobic? Yeah.
Ah so.
Ah so.
All four parts. Recorded it on my computer.
All four parts. Recorded it on my computer.
All four parts. Recorded it on my computer.
All four parts. Recorded it on my computer.
All matters regarding our personal relationship
All matters regarding our personal relationship
All of Dwight's old accounts. Handling it okay?
All of Dwight's old accounts. Handling it okay?
All right, Levinson, here's the rub.
All right, Levinson, here's the rub.
All right!
All right!
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right. All right.
All right. All right.
All right. Okay, fine.
All right. Okay, fine.
All the little birds on...
All the little birds on...
Also Bono.
Also Bono.
Am I right? Yep.
Am I right? Yep.
An hour Iong shower with guys.
An hour Iong shower with guys.
An.. And it's terrible.
An.. And it's terrible.
And a Chihuahua.
And a Chihuahua.
And a lot of times when two people like that get together, it can be explosive.
And a lot of times when two people like that get together, it can be explosive.
And actually give him something,
And actually give him something,
And all of a sudden, Jim pushed me out of the way
And all of a sudden, Jim pushed me out of the way
And can you get here by 5:00?
And can you get here by 5:00?
And certain situations and certain accounts.
And certain situations and certain accounts.
And confirmed on Wikipedia,
And confirmed on Wikipedia,
And don't forget the new black man phrase I taught you.
And don't forget the new black man phrase I taught you.
And Dwight Schrute trivia.
And Dwight Schrute trivia.
And each file is password protected with a different mythical creature, so...
And each file is password protected with a different mythical creature, so...
And every day, for eight years,
And every day, for eight years,
And every night for the last five nights.
And every night for the last five nights.
And everybody was riffling through them like crazy.
And everybody was riffling through them like crazy.
And fly around fighting crime.
And fly around fighting crime.
And gay?
And gay?
And get a distress call from the Commissioner
And get a distress call from the Commissioner
And go into their normal jobs,
And go into their normal jobs,
And good afternoon, fine gentlewomen of Dunder Mifflin.
And good afternoon, fine gentlewomen of Dunder Mifflin.
And he really pressured him into it.
And he really pressured him into it.
And he's a big dude, you know?
And he's a big dude, you know?
And he's been on a little bit of a sabbatical, recently,
And he's been on a little bit of a sabbatical, recently,
And he's just using this Roy thing as leverage.
And he's just using this Roy thing as leverage.
And he's like an eel.
And he's like an eel.
And hopefully, that'll lift everyone's spirits.
And hopefully, that'll lift everyone's spirits.
And I apologize.
And I apologize.
And I gave myself the nastiest shock.
And I gave myself the nastiest shock.
And I grabbed one.
And I grabbed one.
And I just don't think corporate's
And I just don't think corporate's
And I need you to handle hiring the strippers.
And I need you to handle hiring the strippers.
And I replaced him with Andy.
And I replaced him with Andy.
And I think we should celebrate Oscar's Mexicanity.
And I think we should celebrate Oscar's Mexicanity.
And I tried to crawl away, and what happened was,
And I tried to crawl away, and what happened was,
And I wanted to be Oscar specific.
And I wanted to be Oscar specific.
And I will be back shortly.
And I will be back shortly.
And I would just like to make some changes about certain things.
And I would just like to make some changes about certain things.
And I'm also sorry that a lot of people here for some reason think it's funny
And I'm also sorry that a lot of people here for some reason think it's funny
And I'm not into Jim.
And I'm not into Jim.
And I'm officially on the job market and it's very exciting.
And I'm officially on the job market and it's very exciting.
And I'm picking up all of his slack,
And I'm picking up all of his slack,
And I'm sorry for the way those certain events transpired.
And I'm sorry for the way those certain events transpired.
And I'm sure you have a boyfriend in prison or something, so...
And I'm sure you have a boyfriend in prison or something, so...
And if I die, I want my son
And if I die, I want my son
And it better not be what Andy is doing.
And it better not be what Andy is doing.
And it fit.
And it fit.
And it's fine for the time being.
And it's fine for the time being.
And it's weird, because this is not like me.
And it's weird, because this is not like me.
And Jim won't press charges against Roy or the company.
And Jim won't press charges against Roy or the company.
And just shut the hell up.
And just shut the hell up.
And Karen, you might wanna invest
And Karen, you might wanna invest
And listen, because of our, you know, situation,
And listen, because of our, you know, situation,
And Mr. Franklin
And Mr. Franklin
And no, I don't want to talk about it.
And no, I don't want to talk about it.
And not the nunchakus or the throwing stars.
And not the nunchakus or the throwing stars.
And now we are even.
And now we are even.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, the big finale.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, the big finale.
And one night, my mum was tucking me in.
And one night, my mum was tucking me in.
And one night, my mum was tucking me in.
And one night, my mum was tucking me in.
And part of me thinks
And part of me thinks
And remember, no matter what, I will always love you.
And remember, no matter what, I will always love you.
And Roy cocked his fist.
And Roy cocked his fist.
And Roy walked in, looking super angry.
And Roy walked in, looking super angry.
And Roy was lucky that Dwight only used pepper spray,
And Roy was lucky that Dwight only used pepper spray,
And sell paper so we can go on a trip.
And sell paper so we can go on a trip.
And she tried to give me a raspberry
And she tried to give me a raspberry
And she...
And she...
And shoots down the TIE fighters and saves the Rebel cause,
And shoots down the TIE fighters and saves the Rebel cause,
And t was just the worst.
And t was just the worst.
And take off their glasses and change into capes
And take off their glasses and change into capes
And that kid dropped a milkshake on me and you just laughed.
And that kid dropped a milkshake on me and you just laughed.
And the era of the Founding Fathers...
And the era of the Founding Fathers...
And the night before that
And the night before that
And then all of a sudden Dwight stood up and was like, "No!"
And then all of a sudden Dwight stood up and was like, "No!"
And then Darryl made me feel bad for not making any money.
And then Darryl made me feel bad for not making any money.
And then I had to ride up here with stupid Toby.
And then I had to ride up here with stupid Toby.
And then we're gonna go to the movies. Sounds good.
And then we're gonna go to the movies. Sounds good.
And then your assistant is all young and hot and I...
And then your assistant is all young and hot and I...
And then, bam, Dwight sprays him and knocks him on his butt.
And then, bam, Dwight sprays him and knocks him on his butt.
And then?
And then?
And they decided to send me to management training.
And they decided to send me to management training.
And they told me that
And they told me that
And things got a little out of hand.
And things got a little out of hand.
And today, both Darryl and I took something.
And today, both Darryl and I took something.
And we talked it through and it's totally fine.
And we talked it through and it's totally fine.
And we're gonna go to dinner. Okay.
And we're gonna go to dinner. Okay.
And what happens in this one?
And what happens in this one?
And what kind of stripper did you get?
And what kind of stripper did you get?
And when I came to, I had an epiphery.
And when I came to, I had an epiphery.
And when they came over on the Mayflower.
And when they came over on the Mayflower.
And why are you so interested in buying me something, Jim?
And why are you so interested in buying me something, Jim?
And with Roy gone, we've got a smaller crew.
And with Roy gone, we've got a smaller crew.
AND Y: I graduated from anger management
AND Y: I graduated from anger management
And you are engaged
And you are engaged
And you call me to calm you down...
And you call me to calm you down...
And you could just tell he's gonna punch somebody.
And you could just tell he's gonna punch somebody.
And you figure, "How can I put this to practical use?"
And you figure, "How can I put this to practical use?"
And you make one tiny mistake, you're dead.
And you make one tiny mistake, you're dead.
And you think that'd be sexy?
And you think that'd be sexy?
And you're like, "Yeah."
And you're like, "Yeah."
And, actually now, I think that we're better than ever.
And, actually now, I think that we're better than ever.
And, Dwight,
And, Dwight,
And, Elizabeth, the stripper, gave me great advice which rhymed.
And, Elizabeth, the stripper, gave me great advice which rhymed.
Andy is like Mar something. Great sportscaster, big weirdo creep.
Andy is like Mar something. Great sportscaster, big weirdo creep.
ANDY: I don't trust you, Phyllis.
ANDY: I don't trust you, Phyllis.
Andy's a yes man.
Andy's a yes man.
Angela from accounting told me what you did.
Angela from accounting told me what you did.
Angela, Roy's check.
Angela, Roy's check.
Angela.
Angela.
Anger management, technically, but still, management material.
Anger management, technically, but still, management material.
Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject,
Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject,
Anyway, you know who was totally flirting with Ben Franklin? Pam.
Anyway, you know who was totally flirting with Ben Franklin? Pam.
Are there any messages? No.
Are there any messages? No.
Are you near sighted or far sighted?
Are you near sighted or far sighted?
Are you serious? You're earning this?
Are you serious? You're earning this?
Are you wearing lady clothes?
Are you wearing lady clothes?
Are you wearing lady clothes? Those look like lady pants.
Are you wearing lady clothes? Those look like lady pants.
Are you... Are you okay?
Are you... Are you okay?
As to what prima nocta meant.
As to what prima nocta meant.
As you know, Oscar is a gay man
As you know, Oscar is a gay man
As you know, we are six days away from Phyllis' wedding.
As you know, we are six days away from Phyllis' wedding.
At the very least, it's bisexual.
At the very least, it's bisexual.
Attacked another employee in your office.
Attacked another employee in your office.
Back and forth. Give and take.
Back and forth. Give and take.
Be nice to get a memo. We are lovers.
Be nice to get a memo. We are lovers.
Because Dwight loves this company.
Because Dwight loves this company.
Because Dwight...
Because Dwight...
Because he had to drive to New York to drop off the quarterly tax forms
Because he had to drive to New York to drop off the quarterly tax forms
Because I need to try out some of these negotiation tactics on you.
Because I need to try out some of these negotiation tactics on you.
Because I want her to get people excited about my wedding
Because I want her to get people excited about my wedding
Because I'm gay? No, no.
Because I'm gay? No, no.
Because I'm not going to do it anymore, Ryan. I'm not.
Because I'm not going to do it anymore, Ryan. I'm not.
Because it's gonna be awesome.
Because it's gonna be awesome.
Because on paper, Andy and I should be best buds.
Because on paper, Andy and I should be best buds.
Because that is the way these things are done in films.
Because that is the way these things are done in films.
Because they think I'm going to help their career.
Because they think I'm going to help their career.
Because you guys are great together.
Because you guys are great together.
Because you guys are great together.
Because you guys are great together.
Ben Franklin or SpongeBob SquarePants.
Ben Franklin or SpongeBob SquarePants.
Ben Franklin tied a cherry stem in his mouth!
Ben Franklin tied a cherry stem in his mouth!
Ben Franklin, you're really kind of a sleazebag.
Ben Franklin, you're really kind of a sleazebag.
Ben Franklin? Do you wear boxers, briefs or pantaloons?
Ben Franklin? Do you wear boxers, briefs or pantaloons?
Ben Franklin.
Ben Franklin.
Big Apple.
Big Apple.
Big fella comes in screaming about God knows what.
Big fella comes in screaming about God knows what.
Big Turkey?
Big Turkey?
Bippety, boppety.
Bippety, boppety.
Blinds 25l50. Nickels are worth 10,
Blinds 25l50. Nickels are worth 10,
Blonde.
Blonde.
Both. That's why I invented the bifocals.
Both. That's why I invented the bifocals.
Boy, I... No.
Boy, I... No.
Break's over.
Break's over.
Buses, though, will get you home quick.
Buses, though, will get you home quick.
But don't you also have girlfriends in Paris?
But don't you also have girlfriends in Paris?
But each is going to get a little extra dose of naughty.
But each is going to get a little extra dose of naughty.
But I just, I don't want to comment on what happened.
But I just, I don't want to comment on what happened.
But I kept all this from my wife, Deborah.
But I kept all this from my wife, Deborah.
But I'd like that to be moved up to now.
But I'd like that to be moved up to now.
But I've gotten pretty good at reading the back of Jim's neck.
But I've gotten pretty good at reading the back of Jim's neck.
But if he did intend that...
But if he did intend that...
But it has not yet been imported to the United States.
But it has not yet been imported to the United States.
But Jim told me about you guys
But Jim told me about you guys
But now I want to be nice to him
But now I want to be nice to him
But now, apparently, Darryl has some issues with...
But now, apparently, Darryl has some issues with...
But someone like Elizabeth can't.
But someone like Elizabeth can't.
But there is some good news. Oscar is back, addition by addition.
But there is some good news. Oscar is back, addition by addition.
But we had some really good talks
But we had some really good talks
But you have got to ask for 15.
But you have got to ask for 15.
But you just said 15.
But you just said 15.
But you're not still interested in him?
But you're not still interested in him?
But, you know, life is about more than just salary.
But, you know, life is about more than just salary.
Buy you a beer or lunch or something.
Buy you a beer or lunch or something.
By leaning back and by whispering,
By leaning back and by whispering,
By threatening to withhold sex from a female superior.
By threatening to withhold sex from a female superior.
Bye.
Bye.
Can I have a raise?
Can I have a raise?
Can I join, too?
Can I join, too?
Can I, like, see you after work for coffee or something?
Can I, like, see you after work for coffee or something?
Can't hear you.
Can't hear you.
Can't put a price tag on that.
Can't put a price tag on that.
Care for a piece of chocolate?
Care for a piece of chocolate?
Certain events have transpired and I've thought about certain things,
Certain events have transpired and I've thought about certain things,
Change the location of the meeting at the last second.
Change the location of the meeting at the last second.
Check out the new car!
Check out the new car!
Child's play. Give me something hard to sell.
Child's play. Give me something hard to sell.
Chocolate? Where did you acquire it?
Chocolate? Where did you acquire it?
Chris Tucker, Rush Hour.
Chris Tucker, Rush Hour.
Citizens do not accept prizes for being citizens.
Citizens do not accept prizes for being citizens.
Click, click, click, click.
Click, click, click, click.
Click, click, click, click. Click, click, click, click.
Click, click, click, click. Click, click, click, click.
Come on, be for real, Mike.
Come on, be for real, Mike.
Comfortable, Mike?
Comfortable, Mike?
Congratulations, universe, you win.
Congratulations, universe, you win.
Cool
Cool
Cost of doing business.
Cost of doing business.
Cost of doing business.
Cost of doing business.
Could I ask you a question about women?
Could I ask you a question about women?
Could you stop? ...you can just call somebody else
Could you stop? ...you can just call somebody else
Darryl from the warehouse? Mmm hmm.
Darryl from the warehouse? Mmm hmm.
Darryl, you are
Darryl, you are
DARRYL: Yeah. I taught Mike some new phrases.
DARRYL: Yeah. I taught Mike some new phrases.
Decapitated. Whole big thing.
Decapitated. Whole big thing.
Deliciosity.
Deliciosity.
Describe it, please.
Describe it, please.
Did you guys think she was hot?
Did you guys think she was hot?
Didn't Ben Franklin have syphilis?
Didn't Ben Franklin have syphilis?
Didn't think you'd notice.
Didn't think you'd notice.
Dimes, 25, and quarters, 50. Nothing wild.
Dimes, 25, and quarters, 50. Nothing wild.
Discharged it at a distance of a little over a meter
Discharged it at a distance of a little over a meter
Do not make that mistake again.
Do not make that mistake again.
Do what? I just asked you a question.
Do what? I just asked you a question.
Do you have a girlfriend?
Do you have a girlfriend?
Do you have any blonde women?
Do you have any blonde women?
Do you know who the real heroes are?
Do you know who the real heroes are?
Do you still have feelings for her?
Do you still have feelings for her?
Do you still have feelings for her?
Do you still have feelings for her?
Do you think he does so for a free beer?
Do you think he does so for a free beer?
Do you think that anyone else out there would've driven to corporate for you?
Do you think that anyone else out there would've driven to corporate for you?
Do you use Tide detergent?
Do you use Tide detergent?
Do you want me to ask the night cleaning crew
Do you want me to ask the night cleaning crew
Do you want to pull a prank on Andy?
Do you want to pull a prank on Andy?
Don't do that. It's not nice.
Don't do that. It's not nice.
Don't ever touch a black man's radio.
Don't ever touch a black man's radio.
Don't fall asleep at your desk!
Don't fall asleep at your desk!
Don't want it, won't open it, don't need it, won't take it.
Don't want it, won't open it, don't need it, won't take it.
Don't want it.
Don't want it.
Down to the number.
Down to the number.
Duh. Which is why I was joking about doing it.
Duh. Which is why I was joking about doing it.
Dunder Mifflin, customer service. This is Kelly.
Dunder Mifflin, customer service. This is Kelly.
Dunder Mifflin. What kind of company is that?
Dunder Mifflin. What kind of company is that?
Dwight had a big personality and I have a big personality.
Dwight had a big personality and I have a big personality.
DWIGHT: I am ready to face any challenges that might be foolish enough to face me.
DWIGHT: I am ready to face any challenges that might be foolish enough to face me.
DWIGHT: I have left Dunder Mifflin after many record breaking years,
DWIGHT: I have left Dunder Mifflin after many record breaking years,
DWIGHT: Well, that question is meaningless.
DWIGHT: Well, that question is meaningless.
Dwight!
Dwight!
Dwight?
Dwight?
Dwight?
Dwight?
Dwight. Dwight.
Dwight. Dwight.
Either this chick is a dude or Halpert got scared straight.
Either this chick is a dude or Halpert got scared straight.
Either Toby comes with you or we don't do it.
Either Toby comes with you or we don't do it.
Elizabeth, I want you to sit here.
Elizabeth, I want you to sit here.
Encourage him? I'm the victim, okay? He's fishing for me.
Encourage him? I'm the victim, okay? He's fishing for me.
Especially that one.
Especially that one.
Even Steven.
Even Steven.
Even though you're younger and have less experience.
Even though you're younger and have less experience.
Every day for eight years,
Every day for eight years,
Every little bird in the tall oak tree
Every little bird in the tall oak tree
Every little swallow, every chickadee
Every little swallow, every chickadee
Every little swallow, every chickadee
Every little swallow, every chickadee
Every little swallow...
Every little swallow...
Every little swallow...
Every little swallow...
Every new bride on her wedding night.
Every new bride on her wedding night.
Everybody, I'd like to introduce you to Elizabeth.
Everybody, I'd like to introduce you to Elizabeth.
Everyone here is extremely gruntled.
Everyone here is extremely gruntled.
Everything is on my horizon.
Everything is on my horizon.
Everything okay?
Everything okay?
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Feel you, dawg. Yeah, do you?
Feel you, dawg. Yeah, do you?
Fine, I'll just go sit at my desk and be quiet.
Fine, I'll just go sit at my desk and be quiet.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
First off, Michael, this is a salary negotiation.
First off, Michael, this is a salary negotiation.
Flapping them wings...
Flapping them wings...
Football, Cornell, Hofstra. Slaughter.
Football, Cornell, Hofstra. Slaughter.
For example, every year I get a $100 gas card.
For example, every year I get a $100 gas card.
For your convenience, I've broken it down into three parts.
For your convenience, I've broken it down into three parts.
Fourteen years long.
Fourteen years long.
Fourteen years.
Fourteen years.
Fourteen years.
Fourteen years.
Fourteen years.
Fourteen years.
Fourteen.
Fourteen.
FRANKLIN: Hold the door, please!
FRANKLIN: Hold the door, please!
From the Scranton Police Department
From the Scranton Police Department
From the settlement.
From the settlement.
From the top. Ready? Three...
From the top. Ready? Three...
Fun.
Fun.
Genius.
Genius.
Gentlemen, the entertainment is here.
Gentlemen, the entertainment is here.
Gerdy's.
Gerdy's.
German engineering. Nice!
German engineering. Nice!
Get one for the girls, too. That evens it out.
Get one for the girls, too. That evens it out.
Get your own raise.
Get your own raise.
Girls only.
Girls only.
Go ahead, ask me for a raise.
Go ahead, ask me for a raise.
Go back to work!
Go back to work!
God, I need a boyfriend.
God, I need a boyfriend.
God!
God!
God!
God!
Going to go for this right now.
Going to go for this right now.
Going with the whole sleeping better than not.
Going with the whole sleeping better than not.
Gonna go home, get my beer on, get my Lost on.
Gonna go home, get my beer on, get my Lost on.
Gonna hit the break room. Does anybody want anything?
Gonna hit the break room. Does anybody want anything?
Good advice, Beesly. Thanks.
Good advice, Beesly. Thanks.
Good stuff?
Good stuff?
Good to see you.
Good to see you.
Goodness.
Goodness.
Got my rod here.
Got my rod here.
Got some pie, going to be very delicious.
Got some pie, going to be very delicious.
Got you something.
Got you something.
Got you.
Got you.
Got you. Got... Whoa!
Got you. Got... Whoa!
Great.
Great.
Great.
Great.
Guilty.
Guilty.
Guys! Beef, it's what's for dinner.
Guys! Beef, it's what's for dinner.
Half pants, right, Mr. Franklin?
Half pants, right, Mr. Franklin?
Halpert!
Halpert!
Hardworking, alpha male, jackhammer.
Hardworking, alpha male, jackhammer.
Have any of you talked to Dwight?
Have any of you talked to Dwight?
Have to be set aside. Are we clear?
Have to be set aside. Are we clear?
Have you ever seen a stripper before?
Have you ever seen a stripper before?
Having lots of fun, no doubt.
Having lots of fun, no doubt.
He could have broken your nose or something. Crazy.
He could have broken your nose or something. Crazy.
He did the same thing with Josh in Stamford.
He did the same thing with Josh in Stamford.
He hasn't even said a word yet.
He hasn't even said a word yet.
He rocks in the treetop all a day long
He rocks in the treetop all a day long
He rocks in the treetop all a day long
He rocks in the treetop all a day long
He rocks in the treetop all a day long
He rocks in the treetop all a day long
He rocks in the treetop...
He rocks in the treetop...
He saves my life, I get him a box for his desk toy.
He saves my life, I get him a box for his desk toy.
He took everyone's stories.
He took everyone's stories.
He'll always agree with whatever you're saying.
He'll always agree with whatever you're saying.
He's always up in my biznezz,
He's always up in my biznezz,
He's coming in later to pick it up.
He's coming in later to pick it up.
He's gone because of me.
He's gone because of me.
He's in his knickers.
He's in his knickers.
He's not gonna be a murderer.
He's not gonna be a murderer.
He's only one of the five best singers ever.
He's only one of the five best singers ever.
Hello hello! Welcome back! Hi Michael.
Hello hello! Welcome back! Hi Michael.
Hello, everyone.
Hello, everyone.
Hello, hello. Todd Packer.
Hello, hello. Todd Packer.
Hello, Son
Hello, Son
Hello. Come in.
Hello. Come in.
Hello. Hello.
Hello. Hello.
Her eyes were closed and she grabbed me
Her eyes were closed and she grabbed me
Here are some things that I want to teach you
Here are some things that I want to teach you
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here's a little news flash.
Here's a little news flash.
Here's the $40 you gave me.
Here's the $40 you gave me.
Hey where's Dwight?
Hey where's Dwight?
Hey, boss. MICHAEL: Hey, what's up?
Hey, boss. MICHAEL: Hey, what's up?
Hey, guys, guess who's back?
Hey, guys, guess who's back?
Hey, guys.
Hey, guys.
Hey, guys. Jan is ready for you.
Hey, guys. Jan is ready for you.
Hey, Halpert.
Hey, Halpert.
Hey, I wanted to talk to you.
Hey, I wanted to talk to you.
Hey, I'd rather kill myself.
Hey, I'd rather kill myself.
Hey, man, I never got a chance to thank you for stopping Roy.
Hey, man, I never got a chance to thank you for stopping Roy.
Hey, man...
Hey, man...
Hey, maybe you want to come over and raid my closet?
Hey, maybe you want to come over and raid my closet?
Hey, Mike, since Roy left I've been doing
Hey, Mike, since Roy left I've been doing
Hey, Ryan. What?
Hey, Ryan. What?
Hey, so Andy is in rare form today.
Hey, so Andy is in rare form today.
Hey!
Hey!
Hey! Hey, Oscar.
Hey! Hey, Oscar.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey. Hey.
Hey. Hey.
Hey. Hi
Hey. Hi
Hey. What's up?
Hey. What's up?
Hi, Angela
Hi, Angela
Hi, everyone.
Hi, everyone.
Hi, guys.
Hi, guys.
Hi, Jan.
Hi, Jan.
Hi, Toby.
Hi, Toby.
Higher salaries.
Higher salaries.
Hiro from Heroes.
Hiro from Heroes.
His head was thrown back, his shoulder and arm cocked,
His head was thrown back, his shoulder and arm cocked,
Hit it!
Hit it!
Hoppin' and a boppin' and a singin' the song
Hoppin' and a boppin' and a singin' the song
Hoppin' and a boppin' and a singin' the song
Hoppin' and a boppin' and a singin' the song
How many bedrooms? Four.
How many bedrooms? Four.
How many pays does that set you back?
How many pays does that set you back?
How will we get home?
How will we get home?
How would I describe myself? Three words.
How would I describe myself? Three words.
How? Name repetition, personality mirroring and positive reinforcement
How? Name repetition, personality mirroring and positive reinforcement
How... Would you stop interrupting, please?
How... Would you stop interrupting, please?
How's the workload?
How's the workload?
How's this place treating you?
How's this place treating you?
I accidentally cross dressed.
I accidentally cross dressed.
I am 99% sure.
I am 99% sure.
I am declining to speak first.
I am declining to speak first.
I am going to have to call in myself.
I am going to have to call in myself.
I am making it happen, Sergeant.
I am making it happen, Sergeant.
I am not like you!
I am not like you!
I am really sorry.
I am really sorry.
I am serious, Mike. That's a 10 percent raise.
I am serious, Mike. That's a 10 percent raise.
I am usually the guy they call in to clean up the mess.
I am usually the guy they call in to clean up the mess.
I bet she'd be jealous!
I bet she'd be jealous!
I call shuffle! Here we go
I call shuffle! Here we go
I call you in the middle of the night... Guys.
I call you in the middle of the night... Guys.
I called it myself.
I called it myself.
I can offer you a 12 percent raise,
I can offer you a 12 percent raise,
I can only give you a five percent raise.
I can only give you a five percent raise.
I can.
I can.
I can't get a stripper here.
I can't get a stripper here.
I can't imagine what I would have done.
I can't imagine what I would have done.
I can't really explain it.
I can't really explain it.
I can't... What, Mike? Are you...
I can't... What, Mike? Are you...
I denied him!
I denied him!
I did not order a stripper.
I did not order a stripper.
I didn't give you $40.
I didn't give you $40.
I didn't really have time to be scared.
I didn't really have time to be scared.
I didn't say anything. I was waiting to see what would happen.
I didn't say anything. I was waiting to see what would happen.
I didn't think I would but turns out it's great.
I didn't think I would but turns out it's great.
I do not buy women's clothes.
I do not buy women's clothes.
I do! I want some man meat!
I do! I want some man meat!
I do... I wear men's suits. Okay?
I do... I wear men's suits. Okay?
I don't care what Jim says.
I don't care what Jim says.
I don't get to wear my ties. No.
I don't get to wear my ties. No.
I don't get you, Pam.
I don't get you, Pam.
I don't know who that is.
I don't know who that is.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know. Maybe you should go back out there
I don't know. Maybe you should go back out there
I don't know. They're, like, Friday night crowds...
I don't know. They're, like, Friday night crowds...
I don't know. Was a weird day.
I don't know. Was a weird day.
I don't like him, his giant head, or his beady, little eyes.
I don't like him, his giant head, or his beady, little eyes.
I don't make this much.
I don't make this much.
I don't mean to be rude.
I don't mean to be rude.
I don't remember.
I don't remember.
I don't remember.
I don't remember.
I don't think Michael intended to punish me by putting Ryan back here with Kelly.
I don't think Michael intended to punish me by putting Ryan back here with Kelly.
I don't understand how someone can have so little self awareness.
I don't understand how someone can have so little self awareness.
I don't wanna do your laundry anymore.
I don't wanna do your laundry anymore.
I don't want somebody sucking up to me
I don't want somebody sucking up to me
I don't. I'll prove it to you.
I don't. I'll prove it to you.
I established a dominant physical position.
I established a dominant physical position.
I expect to be done in five.
I expect to be done in five.
I feel great, Kevin. Thank you.
I feel great, Kevin. Thank you.
I forced Dwight to resign prematurely
I forced Dwight to resign prematurely
I give you permission to spank them,
I give you permission to spank them,
I got a cousin who lives down there.
I got a cousin who lives down there.
I got this job to make some money while I continue my employment search.
I got this job to make some money while I continue my employment search.
I got this out of a bin.
I got this out of a bin.
I got to send some e mails.
I got to send some e mails.
I guess all things considered,
I guess all things considered,
I guess today,
I guess today,
I have a girlfriend, so...
I have a girlfriend, so...
I have a girlfriend. I...
I have a girlfriend. I...
I have a lovely wife, Deborah.
I have a lovely wife, Deborah.
I have an idea.
I have an idea.
I have brought pepper spray into this office
I have brought pepper spray into this office
I have snow tires and chains,
I have snow tires and chains,
I have to call you the second I get a new assistant now?
I have to call you the second I get a new assistant now?
I haven't been to New York in a long time.
I haven't been to New York in a long time.
I hear there's an important meeting here
I hear there's an important meeting here
I heard some shouting, and I look over and Roy's by reception,
I heard some shouting, and I look over and Roy's by reception,
I heard you might need it, so...
I heard you might need it, so...
I invented tactic number eight.
I invented tactic number eight.
I just can't grab onto him. It's infuriating.
I just can't grab onto him. It's infuriating.
I just can't help myself.
I just can't help myself.
I just got some stuff I got to say to you.
I just got some stuff I got to say to you.
I just need you to ask for it so I can record that you asked for it.
I just need you to ask for it so I can record that you asked for it.
I just thought you guys were really good friends
I just thought you guys were really good friends
I just...
I just...
I just... I think that we both made some bad choices.
I just... I think that we both made some bad choices.
I just... You know, times are tight,
I just... You know, times are tight,
I kept thinking about you two together.
I kept thinking about you two together.
I knew you would, Nancy.
I knew you would, Nancy.
I know this is weird or whatever,
I know this is weird or whatever,
I know.
I know.
I know.
I know.
I know.
I know.
I liked you better as the temp. Me too.
I liked you better as the temp. Me too.
I love your poster.
I love your poster.
I made a mess.
I made a mess.
I made one tiny mistake.
I made one tiny mistake.
I mean "look out" in a fun way.
I mean "look out" in a fun way.
I mean, I wasn't going to do anything, but then...
I mean, I wasn't going to do anything, but then...
I mean, we merged these two branches, right?
I mean, we merged these two branches, right?
I mean, what I was thinking, right?
I mean, what I was thinking, right?
I mean, you're going out with Jim.
I mean, you're going out with Jim.
I miss Dwight.
I miss Dwight.
I miss him.
I miss him.
I never heard of them.
I never heard of them.
I really have no preference. We don't even have to have a party.
I really have no preference. We don't even have to have a party.
I remember it was very late at night, like 11:00, 11:30
I remember it was very late at night, like 11:00, 11:30
I removed my weapon from its secure hiding place.
I removed my weapon from its secure hiding place.
I saw someone breaking the law and I interceded.
I saw someone breaking the law and I interceded.
I saw the perpetrator advance towards the victim at a high rate of speed.
I saw the perpetrator advance towards the victim at a high rate of speed.
I specifically ordered a stripper.
I specifically ordered a stripper.
I still think he's way overpaid.
I still think he's way overpaid.
I still think there is a way you can explain it to Michael.
I still think there is a way you can explain it to Michael.
I think I deserve a raise.
I think I deserve a raise.
I think I know why.
I think I know why.
I think maybe Halpert had stolen his car,
I think maybe Halpert had stolen his car,
I think that maybe you should...
I think that maybe you should...
I think that's champagne.
I think that's champagne.
I think we broke his brain.
I think we broke his brain.
I told him I would be upset if people knew about us,
I told him I would be upset if people knew about us,
I told you not to say it. Do you remember that?
I told you not to say it. Do you remember that?
I wanna do this. Okay
I wanna do this. Okay
I want him to get the raise.
I want him to get the raise.
I want them sucking up to me because they genuinely love me.
I want them sucking up to me because they genuinely love me.
I want you to write down how much you want.
I want you to write down how much you want.
I wanted to let you know that Dwight was late that morning
I wanted to let you know that Dwight was late that morning
I was lucky Dwight was there.
I was lucky Dwight was there.
I was thinking tonight we could read it together.
I was thinking tonight we could read it together.
I wasn't here. So I haven't really heard the whole story.
I wasn't here. So I haven't really heard the whole story.
I went to a bachelor party
I went to a bachelor party
I will literally be standing right here if you need anything at all.
I will literally be standing right here if you need anything at all.
I will shake mine, and then you will shake yours.
I will shake mine, and then you will shake yours.
I won't touch yours, by the way.
I won't touch yours, by the way.
I wore women's clothes.
I wore women's clothes.
I would like a 15 percent raise.
I would like a 15 percent raise.
I.
I.
I...
I...
I... I..
I... I..
I'll be right outside if you need me.
I'll be right outside if you need me.
I'll talk to you later.
I'll talk to you later.
I'm a mere defender of the office.
I'm a mere defender of the office.
I'm closer to firing you.
I'm closer to firing you.
I'm Elizabeth. I'm the dancer that was requested.
I'm Elizabeth. I'm the dancer that was requested.
I'm glad. Any real potential there, Beesly?
I'm glad. Any real potential there, Beesly?
I'm going to call Roy, man.
I'm going to call Roy, man.
I'm going to give you a piece of paper.
I'm going to give you a piece of paper.
I'm going to smack you in the head with a hammer. Come on, let's go.
I'm going to smack you in the head with a hammer. Come on, let's go.
I'm here to teach you a little bit about my life
I'm here to teach you a little bit about my life
I'm here, Jan.
I'm here, Jan.
I'm in... I'm in the sex shop.
I'm in... I'm in the sex shop.
I'm kind of in the middle... Yes, please.
I'm kind of in the middle... Yes, please.
I'm not a hero.
I'm not a hero.
I'm not fine.
I'm not fine.
I'm not going anywhere.
I'm not going anywhere.
I'm not going out with Jim
I'm not going out with Jim
I'm not going to go out and ask for a raise right now.
I'm not going to go out and ask for a raise right now.
I'm not really into strippers.
I'm not really into strippers.
I'm not sure which one Jim hated more.
I'm not sure which one Jim hated more.
I'm pretty sure none of that's real.
I'm pretty sure none of that's real.
I'm scheduled to get one in six months,
I'm scheduled to get one in six months,
I'm so sorry, Pammy.
I'm so sorry, Pammy.
I'm sorry, I had a very different understanding
I'm sorry, I had a very different understanding
I'm sorry, Mike. Some mofos got to hear about this one.
I'm sorry, Mike. Some mofos got to hear about this one.
I'm sorry, too.
I'm sorry, too.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I can't.
I'm sorry. I can't.
I'm sure you guys will find your way back to one another someday.
I'm sure you guys will find your way back to one another someday.
I'm the stripper.
I'm the stripper.
I'm totally ready to be set up
I'm totally ready to be set up
I'm trying to get everyone excited about Phyllis' wedding
I'm trying to get everyone excited about Phyllis' wedding
I've been a loyal employee for a long time.
I've been a loyal employee for a long time.
I've been doing some very interesting reading.
I've been doing some very interesting reading.
I've never asked for a raise in 14 years.
I've never asked for a raise in 14 years.
I've never heard of him.
I've never heard of him.
If he did that with Josh, he could be doing that with me.
If he did that with Josh, he could be doing that with me.
If they stopped watering it?
If they stopped watering it?
If you don't already have one.
If you don't already have one.
If you don't get a stripper, your party's gonna suck.
If you don't get a stripper, your party's gonna suck.
If you were willing to do something like that for some random co worker,
If you were willing to do something like that for some random co worker,
If you're watching this, that means I'm already dead.
If you're watching this, that means I'm already dead.
In a dress or a skirt of some kind
In a dress or a skirt of some kind
In a way, you did.
In a way, you did.
In fact, it's pretty freaking un funny!
In fact, it's pretty freaking un funny!
In the warehouse from 2:30 to 3:15
In the warehouse from 2:30 to 3:15
In your head
In your head
In your head
In your head
In your head
In your head
Indicating an attack position.
Indicating an attack position.
Instead, I called the Scholastic Speakers of Pennsylvania.
Instead, I called the Scholastic Speakers of Pennsylvania.
Into the perpetrator's eyes, nose and face area,
Into the perpetrator's eyes, nose and face area,
Irrelevant.
Irrelevant.
Is everything okay?
Is everything okay?
Is in your apartment in the middle of the night,
Is in your apartment in the middle of the night,
Is it the same grill you grilled your foot on?
Is it the same grill you grilled your foot on?
Is that you singing?
Is that you singing?
Is Toby there?
Is Toby there?
Is when the king got to deflower
Is when the king got to deflower
It is a big loss. Dwight was the top salesman.
It is a big loss. Dwight was the top salesman.
It is a mess. Big mess.
It is a mess. Big mess.
It is about perks. It...
It is about perks. It...
It is mysterious, because the buttons are on the wrong side.
It is mysterious, because the buttons are on the wrong side.
It is the only time that Bob was available.
It is the only time that Bob was available.
It is the only time that Bob was available.
It is the only time that Bob was available.
It really makes you wonder how Ben Franklin can become President,
It really makes you wonder how Ben Franklin can become President,
It reminds me a lot of
It reminds me a lot of
It sounded interesting, what you were gonna...
It sounded interesting, what you were gonna...
It sucked.
It sucked.
It takes a big man to admit his mistake, and I am that big man.
It takes a big man to admit his mistake, and I am that big man.
It used to brighten my morning.
It used to brighten my morning.
It was a crime of passion, Jan.
It was a crime of passion, Jan.
It was a good talk. Wait! Im sorry.
It was a good talk. Wait! Im sorry.
It was a little glass display case for his bobblehead.
It was a little glass display case for his bobblehead.
It was a warm June evening in 1 752,
It was a warm June evening in 1 752,
It was crazy. Man.
It was crazy. Man.
It was insane.
It was insane.
It was one of her many aliases.
It was one of her many aliases.
It will be a groundbreaking case
It will be a groundbreaking case
It'll probably be on a boat.
It'll probably be on a boat.
It's a bridal shower for guys. A guy shower.
It's a bridal shower for guys. A guy shower.
It's a company lease.
It's a company lease.
It's about perks.
It's about perks.
It's been a really rough couple of days.
It's been a really rough couple of days.
It's European, okay? It's a European cut.
It's European, okay? It's a European cut.
It's gonna be a great bachelor party, man.
It's gonna be a great bachelor party, man.
It's gonna be good.
It's gonna be good.
It's gonna be like that, huh?
It's gonna be like that, huh?
It's just so stupid. I mean, getting back with Roy and everything.
It's just so stupid. I mean, getting back with Roy and everything.
It's like when he annoys me and I want to screw with him
It's like when he annoys me and I want to screw with him
It's like, big difference.
It's like, big difference.
It's my job to insure that none of you look like ragamuffins.
It's my job to insure that none of you look like ragamuffins.
It's not a big deal, it's just a kiss.
It's not a big deal, it's just a kiss.
It's not funny!
It's not funny!
It's not really any of my business.
It's not really any of my business.
It's not that big.
It's not that big.
It's the only time he can do it.
It's the only time he can do it.
It's the only time he can do it.
It's the only time he can do it.
It's very moving and sexy, the art.
It's very moving and sexy, the art.
Italians don't wear pockets.
Italians don't wear pockets.
JAN: Michael, I left a meeting. What is so urgent?
JAN: Michael, I left a meeting. What is so urgent?
JAN: Michael, last Friday, one of your employees
JAN: Michael, last Friday, one of your employees
JAN: Well, why don't we talk next month after the quarter ends?
JAN: Well, why don't we talk next month after the quarter ends?
Jennifer Garner portrayed one on Alias.
Jennifer Garner portrayed one on Alias.
Jim says something, Roy stops over there, all of a sudden, bam,
Jim says something, Roy stops over there, all of a sudden, bam,
JIM: "It's not freaking funny!"
JIM: "It's not freaking funny!"
JIM: Are you okay?
JIM: Are you okay?
JIM: Wow. Took me forever.
JIM: Wow. Took me forever.
Jim.
Jim.
Just giggling.
Just giggling.
Just go with the copy paper, it's your funeral.
Just go with the copy paper, it's your funeral.
Just like Rambo.
Just like Rambo.
Just preparing for the deposition.
Just preparing for the deposition.
Just sit on down.
Just sit on down.
Just thought you'd get a kick out of the new ring.
Just thought you'd get a kick out of the new ring.
Karen and I had a long talk last night
Karen and I had a long talk last night
Karen and I have been up talking.
Karen and I have been up talking.
Karen Filippelli, Jim's girlfriend.
Karen Filippelli, Jim's girlfriend.
Karen Filippelli, Jim's girlfriend.
Karen Filippelli, Jim's girlfriend.
KAREN: I guess Jim and I have had a little bit
KAREN: I guess Jim and I have had a little bit
KAREN: I guess Jim and I have had a little bit
KAREN: I guess Jim and I have had a little bit
KAREN: So, do you want to see it or not?
KAREN: So, do you want to see it or not?
Kelly, don't do this.
Kelly, don't do this.
KELLY: What is so stupid about wanting to name a baby Usher?
KELLY: What is so stupid about wanting to name a baby Usher?
KELLY: You are so mean.
KELLY: You are so mean.
Kev, have a good weekend. Yeah, sure.
Kev, have a good weekend. Yeah, sure.
Kissed me on my butt.
Kissed me on my butt.
Knickers, in fact. Yes.
Knickers, in fact. Yes.
Ladies and gentlemen, may I present Mr. Dwight Schrute.
Ladies and gentlemen, may I present Mr. Dwight Schrute.
Large Tuna, have you seen my cell phone device?
Large Tuna, have you seen my cell phone device?
Leave me alone and get the male stripper. Fine.
Leave me alone and get the male stripper. Fine.
Let's get down to business.
Let's get down to business.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Let's just clear out, okay? Shame on you.
Let's just clear out, okay? Shame on you.
Let's just do this in 15.
Let's just do this in 15.
Life is a... How do you know it's gonna be a boy?
Life is a... How do you know it's gonna be a boy?
Life is precious.
Life is precious.
Like a crazy person a little.
Like a crazy person a little.
Like having sex with Jan...
Like having sex with Jan...
Like the time we were on the Ferris wheel,
Like the time we were on the Ferris wheel,
Like, a lot of them?
Like, a lot of them?
Like, you know, separate but equal.
Like, you know, separate but equal.
Likes me a lot.
Likes me a lot.
Listen, I forgot to tell you the plan for this Saturday.
Listen, I forgot to tell you the plan for this Saturday.
Litterally.
Litterally.
Look at that.
Look at that.
Look who's here!
Look who's here!
Look, I don't know how to say this, so I just will.
Look, I don't know how to say this, so I just will.
Look, I've got like 15 new clients that I've inherited from Dwight
Look, I've got like 15 new clients that I've inherited from Dwight
Look, it's got shoulder pads. And did you see that lining?
Look, it's got shoulder pads. And did you see that lining?
Look, there's a teddy bear in a policeman's cap.
Look, there's a teddy bear in a policeman's cap.
Love that Andy, right? Solid fellow. Seems smart enough.
Love that Andy, right? Solid fellow. Seems smart enough.
Love to hear the robin goin'...
Love to hear the robin goin'...
Make it happen, Captain.
Make it happen, Captain.
Makes them feel uncomfortable, puts you in control.
Makes them feel uncomfortable, puts you in control.
Man, I cannot believe I missed the fight.
Man, I cannot believe I missed the fight.
Man. TGI Wednesday.
Man. TGI Wednesday.
Mar something?
Mar something?
Maybe I'll stay overnight.
Maybe I'll stay overnight.
Maybe I'll stay.
Maybe I'll stay.
Maybe that's how you die?
Maybe that's how you die?
Maybe you just feel guilty about all the pranks.
Maybe you just feel guilty about all the pranks.
Merciless, insatiable
Merciless, insatiable
Michael referred me to a male strip club called Banana Slings.
Michael referred me to a male strip club called Banana Slings.
Michael, Dwight would like your man meat.
Michael, Dwight would like your man meat.
Michael, he's your branch's HR rep...
Michael, he's your branch's HR rep...
Michael, the pants don't have any pockets.
Michael, the pants don't have any pockets.
MICHAEL: Hello, ladies.
MICHAEL: Hello, ladies.
MICHAEL: I can't believe you're not gonna be there.
MICHAEL: I can't believe you're not gonna be there.
MICHAEL: It takes a big man to admit his mistake and that's what I did.
MICHAEL: It takes a big man to admit his mistake and that's what I did.
MICHAEL: Negotiation is an art.
MICHAEL: Negotiation is an art.
MICHAEL: Who's that sportscaster that bit that lady?
MICHAEL: Who's that sportscaster that bit that lady?
MICHAEL: Yes! Yes!
MICHAEL: Yes! Yes!
Michael? Here's the $15 I owe you.
Michael? Here's the $15 I owe you.
Michael.
Michael.
Michael. No.
Michael. No.
Michael...
Michael...
Michael... No. No, I mean, not because you're gay.
Michael... No. No, I mean, not because you're gay.
Mike, okay. A stripper is Bachelor Party 101.
Mike, okay. A stripper is Bachelor Party 101.
Mike, this is barely more than I make.
Mike, this is barely more than I make.
Mr. Franklin, I would say you are probably
Mr. Franklin, I would say you are probably
Mr. Franklin? Yes.
Mr. Franklin? Yes.
My boss isn't funny.
My boss isn't funny.
My name is Gordon.
My name is Gordon.
My reaction was to have lots of long talks with Jim about our feelings.
My reaction was to have lots of long talks with Jim about our feelings.
Nailed it.
Nailed it.
Near the river.
Near the river.
Need any help?
Need any help?
Negotiations are all about controlling things,
Negotiations are all about controlling things,
Never underestimate the power of a good night's sleep.
Never underestimate the power of a good night's sleep.
Never.
Never.
Nevermind, you're busy. I'll come back tomorrow.
Nevermind, you're busy. I'll come back tomorrow.
Nice job. Thank you muchly.
Nice job. Thank you muchly.
Nice job. Thank you muchly.
Nice job. Thank you muchly.
Nice one.
Nice one.
Nice to have Oscar back.
Nice to have Oscar back.
Nice.
Nice.
Nice.
Nice.
No I will not.
No I will not.
No need for consternation. Everything is under control.
No need for consternation. Everything is under control.
No need to thank me.
No need to thank me.
No preference.
No preference.
No problem.
No problem.
No tats.
No tats.
No tricks, no Wikipedia.
No tricks, no Wikipedia.
No, but we can offer you 12.
No, but we can offer you 12.
No, don't call me a hero.
No, don't call me a hero.
No, hey. Hey, don't be ridiculous. Of course we're going to have a party.
No, hey. Hey, don't be ridiculous. Of course we're going to have a party.
No, I don't want to do that because I'm twice your size anyway.
No, I don't want to do that because I'm twice your size anyway.
No, I mean, you guys really seem to have a strong connection.
No, I mean, you guys really seem to have a strong connection.
No, I'm sure you're right.
No, I'm sure you're right.
No, it's...
No, it's...
No, Jan.
No, Jan.
No, John Denver.
No, John Denver.
No, just stop. Stop. Just stop doing it. You're going to drive me crazy.
No, just stop. Stop. Just stop doing it. You're going to drive me crazy.
No, just stop. Stop. Just stop doing it. You're going to drive me crazy.
No, just stop. Stop. Just stop doing it. You're going to drive me crazy.
No, just...
No, just...
No, Michael, we... We need an HR rep,
No, Michael, we... We need an HR rep,
No, no, no, no. I don't need it.
No, no, no, no. I don't need it.
No, please, please don't.
No, please, please don't.
No, sorry.
No, sorry.
No, tats. Of course, I want...
No, tats. Of course, I want...
No, they don't, see?
No, they don't, see?
No, Toby is terrible.
No, Toby is terrible.
No, today at work.
No, today at work.
No, what is it?
No, what is it?
No, you know what, let's stay here.
No, you know what, let's stay here.
No! He has been wanting a raise for a couple of months
No! He has been wanting a raise for a couple of months
No! No! No!
No! No! No!
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No. 'Cause someone is calling right now.
No. 'Cause someone is calling right now.
No. And...
No. And...
No. Come on.
No. Come on.
No. He has a girlfriend.
No. He has a girlfriend.
No. I don't wanna do any of that.
No. I don't wanna do any of that.
No. No. Michael.
No. No. Michael.
No. This is a power suit.
No. This is a power suit.
No...
No...
No...
No...
None of them. Especially not Andy.
None of them. Especially not Andy.
Not a disgruntled employee.
Not a disgruntled employee.
Not anymore. It's completely over now.
Not anymore. It's completely over now.
Not bad, huh?
Not bad, huh?
Not bad! Not bad!
Not bad! Not bad!
Not personally, no.
Not personally, no.
Not personally, no.
Not personally, no.
Not really.
Not really.
Not right now, but ask me again ten years ago.
Not right now, but ask me again ten years ago.
Not super crazy, just...
Not super crazy, just...
Not that I've been eavesdropping.
Not that I've been eavesdropping.
Not that that's wrong.
Not that that's wrong.
Not... Not... It's not gay. It's just a...
Not... Not... It's not gay. It's just a...
Nothing like grilling in the great outdoors.
Nothing like grilling in the great outdoors.
Nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing. I was just thinking of something else.
Nothing. I was just thinking of something else.
Now I'm back, got a second chance and I'm not going to blow it.
Now I'm back, got a second chance and I'm not going to blow it.
Now slide it. Yes.
Now slide it. Yes.
Number 14, declining to speak first.
Number 14, declining to speak first.
Number eight, learn how to take off a woman's bra.
Number eight, learn how to take off a woman's bra.
Of a rough patch for the past couple weeks,
Of a rough patch for the past couple weeks,
Of course, if Oscar wants a donkey, let's get him one.
Of course, if Oscar wants a donkey, let's get him one.
Of course.
Of course.
Off my wall sockets with a metal fork
Off my wall sockets with a metal fork
Oh rockin' robin well you really gonna rock tonight
Oh rockin' robin well you really gonna rock tonight
Oh rockin' robin well you really gonna rock tonight
Oh rockin' robin well you really gonna rock tonight
Oh, 12 reams?
Oh, 12 reams?
Oh, come on. Be serious.
Oh, come on. Be serious.
Oh, God!
Oh, God!
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God. I got you jade earrings.
Oh, God. I got you jade earrings.
Oh, God. Okay.
Oh, God. Okay.
Oh, God...
Oh, God...
Oh, gross.
Oh, gross.
Oh, he's right there.
Oh, he's right there.
Oh, hello, Oscar. How was your gaycation?
Oh, hello, Oscar. How was your gaycation?
Oh, here we go. All right!
Oh, here we go. All right!
Oh, hi, you must be Andy.
Oh, hi, you must be Andy.
Oh, hi. Yes, I am, and you must be Marcy.
Oh, hi. Yes, I am, and you must be Marcy.
Oh, I don't know, maybe. Well, I'll take that as a maybe.
Oh, I don't know, maybe. Well, I'll take that as a maybe.
Oh, I'm going to the kitchen, I'll walk with you.
Oh, I'm going to the kitchen, I'll walk with you.
Oh, it was?
Oh, it was?
Oh, man.
Oh, man.
Oh, my God, I would get so fat if I worked here.
Oh, my God, I would get so fat if I worked here.
Oh, my God, she told you? Yes, she did.
Oh, my God, she told you? Yes, she did.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. That's a woman's suit.
Oh, my God. That's a woman's suit.
Oh, my God. That's half inch dry wall.
Oh, my God. That's half inch dry wall.
Oh, my God. You're, like, agoraphobic.
Oh, my God. You're, like, agoraphobic.
Oh, no, thank you. I'm just looking.
Oh, no, thank you. I'm just looking.
Oh, no! I was confused by your phrasing.
Oh, no! I was confused by your phrasing.
Oh, okay. Good.
Oh, okay. Good.
Oh, really? Have you heard of paper?
Oh, really? Have you heard of paper?
Oh, so I'm crazy now?
Oh, so I'm crazy now?
Oh, sure, we talk all the time.
Oh, sure, we talk all the time.
Oh, that wasn't the night crew. That was Dwight.
Oh, that wasn't the night crew. That was Dwight.
Oh, what a duo, magical Andy and the Tuna
Oh, what a duo, magical Andy and the Tuna
Oh, yeah, I can totally help you with that.
Oh, yeah, I can totally help you with that.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah. Don't worry about it.
Oh, yeah. Don't worry about it.
Oh, yeah. Why?
Oh, yeah. Why?
Oh, you can stay, too. He's got a big place.
Oh, you can stay, too. He's got a big place.
Oh.
Oh.
Okay, all right, I got to go. Late.
Okay, all right, I got to go. Late.
Okay, Ben Franklin.
Okay, Ben Franklin.
Okay, can you stand right there for one second?
Okay, can you stand right there for one second?
Okay, co ed naked strippers in this office, for realsies.
Okay, co ed naked strippers in this office, for realsies.
Okay, Darryl, ask me for a raise.
Okay, Darryl, ask me for a raise.
Okay, Dwight, you can let go of her hand. You're gonna break it.
Okay, Dwight, you can let go of her hand. You're gonna break it.
Okay, everybody, a slight change of plans.
Okay, everybody, a slight change of plans.
Okay, good. Stay right here.
Okay, good. Stay right here.
Okay, I want you to be Darryl and ask me for a raise
Okay, I want you to be Darryl and ask me for a raise
Okay, I'll start. It's pretty simple, really.
Okay, I'll start. It's pretty simple, really.
Okay, it seems here that you ordered 12,000 reams of paper.
Okay, it seems here that you ordered 12,000 reams of paper.
Okay, let's try another one. Okay.
Okay, let's try another one. Okay.
Okay, Michael.
Okay, Michael.
Okay, okay. All right, all right, I'll join. I'd love to.
Okay, okay. All right, all right, I'll join. I'd love to.
Okay, so they have Albert Einstein,
Okay, so they have Albert Einstein,
Okay, so this is what's gonna happen.
Okay, so this is what's gonna happen.
Okay, the game is No Limit Deuce To Seven Lowball.
Okay, the game is No Limit Deuce To Seven Lowball.
Okay, Toby, how about if you...
Okay, Toby, how about if you...
Okay, well, the next time that you get scared that you think a murderer
Okay, well, the next time that you get scared that you think a murderer
Okay, you know what, I...
Okay, you know what, I...
Okay! All right, I'll do it.
Okay! All right, I'll do it.
Okay?
Okay?
Okay? And we're shipping more now than we ever have.
Okay? And we're shipping more now than we ever have.
Okay? So it was a warm June evening...
Okay? So it was a warm June evening...
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay. All right.
Okay. All right.
Okay. Bring it home now.
Okay. Bring it home now.
Okay. Did you see that?
Okay. Did you see that?
Okay. Here we go.
Okay. Here we go.
Okay. If you don't want a gift, at least let me
Okay. If you don't want a gift, at least let me
Okay. Let me just get the folder out.
Okay. Let me just get the folder out.
Okay. Let's take 15 again.
Okay. Let's take 15 again.
Okay. Michael, please.
Okay. Michael, please.
Okay. Okay. Here's the straight dope.
Okay. Okay. Here's the straight dope.
Okay. See what I did?
Okay. See what I did?
Okay. This is...
Okay. This is...
Okay. We are off.
Okay. We are off.
Okay. What?
Okay. What?
On my tummy.
On my tummy.
On one hand, I want to be honest with Jan and tell her the truth
On one hand, I want to be honest with Jan and tell her the truth
On the other hand, I'm afraid she's gonna dump me.
On the other hand, I'm afraid she's gonna dump me.
On time.
On time.
One of the sexiest presidents ever.
One of the sexiest presidents ever.
Or maybe he was gay or something.
Or maybe he was gay or something.
Oscar, I have a question.
Oscar, I have a question.
Oscar, you really need to learn more about your culture.
Oscar, you really need to learn more about your culture.
Oscar.
Oscar.
Oscar. Good to have you back. Pam. Good to be back.
Oscar. Good to have you back. Pam. Good to be back.
Over another woman?
Over another woman?
Ow!
Ow!
Pam, I have a mission to accomplish. Make sure this party gets rolling
Pam, I have a mission to accomplish. Make sure this party gets rolling
Pam, in the frozen food section,
Pam, in the frozen food section,
Pam, please call security.
Pam, please call security.
Pam, you good?
Pam, you good?
PAM: Hey
PAM: Hey
PAM: I really don't want to talk about it.
PAM: I really don't want to talk about it.
PAM: Jim.
PAM: Jim.
PAM: Something's up with Jim and Karen.
PAM: Something's up with Jim and Karen.
Paper company.
Paper company.
Part of me wants the people of this office to have learned their lesson
Part of me wants the people of this office to have learned their lesson
Party pooper.
Party pooper.
People have laughed at me.
People have laughed at me.
Perp grabbed the victim.
Perp grabbed the victim.
Pippety poppety, give me the zoppety.
Pippety poppety, give me the zoppety.
Please.
Please.
Please. They hand these out to little kids.
Please. They hand these out to little kids.
Plus exceptional hand eye coordination.
Plus exceptional hand eye coordination.
Plus perks. Yes.
Plus perks. Yes.
Prima nocta, I believe, from the movie Braveheart
Prima nocta, I believe, from the movie Braveheart
Professional resume, athletic and special skills resume
Professional resume, athletic and special skills resume
Quick! Somebody help! Help the man!
Quick! Somebody help! Help the man!
Rainbow stickers. All over the back windshield.
Rainbow stickers. All over the back windshield.
Really coming down out there. The commute's gonna be hell.
Really coming down out there. The commute's gonna be hell.
Really?
Really?
Really?
Really?
Really?
Really?
Really?
Really?
Really? Looks like I hired the right guy.
Really? Looks like I hired the right guy.
Really? No.
Really? No.
Really? That was very nice of him.
Really? That was very nice of him.
Really. Yeah.
Really. Yeah.
Rendering him utterly and completely disabled.
Rendering him utterly and completely disabled.
Right now, we can offer you a six percent raise.
Right now, we can offer you a six percent raise.
Right, addition by subtraction.
Right, addition by subtraction.
Right.
Right.
Roy goes down and Dwight's standing there like an action hero.
Roy goes down and Dwight's standing there like an action hero.
Roy just attacked him.
Roy just attacked him.
Roy. Look out!
Roy. Look out!
Ruddy cheeks, thick calves, no tats, no moles.
Ruddy cheeks, thick calves, no tats, no moles.
Ryan and I are going to go get some supplies
Ryan and I are going to go get some supplies
RYAN: Don't you see why that's insane?
RYAN: Don't you see why that's insane?
RYAN: I don't know what you're talking about.
RYAN: I don't know what you're talking about.
RYAN: Okay.
RYAN: Okay.
Sally
Sally
Same old.
Same old.
Saying whatever thought pops in your head!
Saying whatever thought pops in your head!
See how that works out for you.
See how that works out for you.
See you out there? Yeah.
See you out there? Yeah.
Seeing the world, finding himself
Seeing the world, finding himself
Sex. Steve Martin. Teri Hatcher.
Sex. Steve Martin. Teri Hatcher.
Sexual harassment.
Sexual harassment.
She's an artist and I appreciate that.
She's an artist and I appreciate that.
Should I tell my girlfriend that you danced up on me?
Should I tell my girlfriend that you danced up on me?
Shout it from the mountain tops, my friend!
Shout it from the mountain tops, my friend!
Show her who wears the pants in the relationship.
Show her who wears the pants in the relationship.
Shut it!
Shut it!
Shut up, Angela!
Shut up, Angela!
Shut up! Yep.
Shut up! Yep.
Side note, just like to say I'm thrilled to be working directly beneath you.
Side note, just like to say I'm thrilled to be working directly beneath you.
Sir, would you do the honor?
Sir, would you do the honor?
Six percent? After all we've been through?
Six percent? After all we've been through?
So don't worry about old Andy Bernard. I'll be back.
So don't worry about old Andy Bernard. I'll be back.
So get your suits to the dry cleaners and get your hair did.
So get your suits to the dry cleaners and get your hair did.
So he didn't have an alibi for Michael!
So he didn't have an alibi for Michael!
So here's to the future, Andy and the Tuna.
So here's to the future, Andy and the Tuna.
So how much do you love Lance Bass now?
So how much do you love Lance Bass now?
So I am instituting prima nocta.
So I am instituting prima nocta.
So I don't think that this is totally just a woman's suit.
So I don't think that this is totally just a woman's suit.
So I guess, you have the Ben Franklin wig and the costume
So I guess, you have the Ben Franklin wig and the costume
So I know what it's like
So I know what it's like
So I think I should be compensated fairly by getting a raise.
So I think I should be compensated fairly by getting a raise.
So I think you should just bring Toby.
So I think you should just bring Toby.
So maybe you should come back.
So maybe you should come back.
So Michael had a little chat with corporate
So Michael had a little chat with corporate
So none of that tipped you off?
So none of that tipped you off?
So now we're shipping twice as many orders as we used to.
So now we're shipping twice as many orders as we used to.
So that's what that means.
So that's what that means.
So the big fella pulls out a sock filled with nickels.
So the big fella pulls out a sock filled with nickels.
So this reminds you of your childhood or anything?
So this reminds you of your childhood or anything?
So we are going to have a big party today to welcome him back,
So we are going to have a big party today to welcome him back,
So weird.
So weird.
So what do I do?
So what do I do?
So where's the groom?
So where's the groom?
So you don't want to end our relationship?
So you don't want to end our relationship?
So you know who turned out to be kind of a creep?
So you know who turned out to be kind of a creep?
So you know you are getting the best possible information.
So you know you are getting the best possible information.
So, Karen, how do you feel that Roy tried to kick your boyfriend's ass
So, Karen, how do you feel that Roy tried to kick your boyfriend's ass
So, look out, Dunder Mifflin.
So, look out, Dunder Mifflin.
So, Phyllis, I want you to go find firecrackers
So, Phyllis, I want you to go find firecrackers
So, well, good.
So, well, good.
So, where were you working before this?
So, where were you working before this?
So, you and Bob are looking at a historical house?
So, you and Bob are looking at a historical house?
So, you going to start dating Halpert then?
So, you going to start dating Halpert then?
So...
So...
Somehow...
Somehow...
Something like that.
Something like that.
Sometimes I say I don't like something, he says he doesn't like it either.
Sometimes I say I don't like something, he says he doesn't like it either.
Sorry about that. Oh, smooth move, Tuna.
Sorry about that. Oh, smooth move, Tuna.
Sorry I almost got you killed.
Sorry I almost got you killed.
Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship.
Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Sort of a guys' night out.
Sort of a guys' night out.
Sort of. He had a lot of clients.
Sort of. He had a lot of clients.
Sparkling cider is very good.
Sparkling cider is very good.
SquarePants?
SquarePants?
Still nothing.
Still nothing.
Stop. That's disgusting.
Stop. That's disgusting.
Strip off his clothes in this office.
Strip off his clothes in this office.
Stripper?
Stripper?
Sure. Great.
Sure. Great.
Sure. So...
Sure. So...
Swanson makes a delightful chimichanga.
Swanson makes a delightful chimichanga.
Tactic number six.
Tactic number six.
Tales of bravery.
Tales of bravery.
Tall, queer, handsome as ever.
Tall, queer, handsome as ever.
Tell Darryl that this is not a woman's suit?
Tell Darryl that this is not a woman's suit?
Text back, "Kind of."
Text back, "Kind of."
Than go out to a movie with your awesome girlfriend.
Than go out to a movie with your awesome girlfriend.
Thank God. Yeah.
Thank God. Yeah.
Thank you for that introduction, Mr. Scott!
Thank you for that introduction, Mr. Scott!
Thank you this was helpful.
Thank you this was helpful.
Thank you, Hunter.
Thank you, Hunter.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you. Good to be back.
Thank you. Good to be back.
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you. Yeah.
Thank you. Yeah.
Thanks, Dwight.
Thanks, Dwight.
Thanks, Kev. I'm good, though.
Thanks, Kev. I'm good, though.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Thanks. Well, you ready to have some fun? Yeah.
Thanks. Well, you ready to have some fun? Yeah.
That I forgot to send.
That I forgot to send.
That is a delicacy in the Amazon,
That is a delicacy in the Amazon,
That is not the real Ben Franklin.
That is not the real Ben Franklin.
That is not the real Ben Franklin.
That is not the real Ben Franklin.
That is ridiculous.
That is ridiculous.
That is so sweet.
That is so sweet.
That is the bravest thing I have ever heard.
That is the bravest thing I have ever heard.
That sounds
That sounds
That there is a woman's suit.
That there is a woman's suit.
That was an overreaction.
That was an overreaction.
That was nuts.
That was nuts.
That would have made his evening, I think.
That would have made his evening, I think.
That your mother won't be able to.
That your mother won't be able to.
That's 'cause of you, Mike.
That's 'cause of you, Mike.
That's a hero.
That's a hero.
That's a nice outfit.
That's a nice outfit.
That's a surprise. Okay.
That's a surprise. Okay.
That's all I got to say on the matter.
That's all I got to say on the matter.
That's all you, that's all you.
That's all you, that's all you.
That's my new assistant.
That's my new assistant.
That's ridiculous. I'm never going to...
That's ridiculous. I'm never going to...
That's right, it's so good to meet you. It's so good to meet you.
That's right, it's so good to meet you. It's so good to meet you.
That's rude.
That's rude.
That's the mystery.
That's the mystery.
That's true. Yeah, that's true.
That's true. Yeah, that's true.
That's very funny.
That's very funny.
That's what I want. I can't give you that.
That's what I want. I can't give you that.
That's why.
That's why.
That's... Thank you.
That's... Thank you.
The celebration of Oscar. Oscar night.
The celebration of Oscar. Oscar night.
The committee with all the women? Yeah
The committee with all the women? Yeah
The end.
The end.
The guys are having a little shindig of their own
The guys are having a little shindig of their own
The guys who wake up every morning
The guys who wake up every morning
The important thing is, I learned something.
The important thing is, I learned something.
The night of my fateful kite flight...
The night of my fateful kite flight...
The one, the only, the sexy, Mr. Benjamin Franklin!
The one, the only, the sexy, Mr. Benjamin Franklin!
The same way I graduated from Cornell.
The same way I graduated from Cornell.
The Three Amigos with Steve Martin and Chevy Chase
The Three Amigos with Steve Martin and Chevy Chase
The wise old owl and the big black crow
The wise old owl and the big black crow
Then clearly, I misjudged you from the beginning.
Then clearly, I misjudged you from the beginning.
Then I contacted the authorities.
Then I contacted the authorities.
Then I want you to slide it back across the desk to me.
Then I want you to slide it back across the desk to me.
Then Schrute grabs a can of hairspray and a lighter...
Then Schrute grabs a can of hairspray and a lighter...
Then you take these bad boys and clip them anywhere on the engine.
Then you take these bad boys and clip them anywhere on the engine.
Then, quick nap at my place and we hit the tizzown.
Then, quick nap at my place and we hit the tizzown.
Then, you take these and clip them wherever.
Then, you take these and clip them wherever.
There he is.
There he is.
There is a call.
There is a call.
There is a pay stub.
There is a pay stub.
There were a lot of reasons.
There were a lot of reasons.
There were these huge bins of clothes,
There were these huge bins of clothes,
There you go.
There you go.
There you go.
There you go.
There...
There...
There's a bunch of people back here.
There's a bunch of people back here.
There's nothing on my horizon except everything.
There's nothing on my horizon except everything.
There's something about him that creeps me out.
There's something about him that creeps me out.
These things only serve to upset the women.
These things only serve to upset the women.
They always used to arrange the toys on my desk in a very pleasing way
They always used to arrange the toys on my desk in a very pleasing way
They are the gentler sex.
They are the gentler sex.
They put you in charge.
They put you in charge.
They're not going to give the working man more than the boss.
They're not going to give the working man more than the boss.
Things are going pretty good. Getting a lot of face time with the boss.
Things are going pretty good. Getting a lot of face time with the boss.
Think I could go for some tuna fish right about now.
Think I could go for some tuna fish right about now.
This helps a little.
This helps a little.
This is going nowhere. No. No. No.
This is going nowhere. No. No. No.
This is going to make him feel better.
This is going to make him feel better.
This is long overdue. I want to do it today.
This is long overdue. I want to do it today.
This is me, Jan. This is me.
This is me, Jan. This is me.
This is sick, please. Stop it, stop it.
This is sick, please. Stop it, stop it.
This is too good. All right.
This is too good. All right.
This is wrong! This is wrong.
This is wrong! This is wrong.
This may be Phyllis' only wedding ever.
This may be Phyllis' only wedding ever.
This may the first time that a male subordinate has attempted
This may the first time that a male subordinate has attempted
This whole thing's supposed to take 10 weeks.
This whole thing's supposed to take 10 weeks.
Those are the real heroes.
Those are the real heroes.
Those are very good points.
Those are very good points.
Though to be fair, Kevin never reminded me.
Though to be fair, Kevin never reminded me.
Through nods and smiles.
Through nods and smiles.
To get a modest, scheduled raise
To get a modest, scheduled raise
To get him back, he never sees it coming.
To get him back, he never sees it coming.
To have your butt kissed.
To have your butt kissed.
To jump start a car, first, pop the hood.
To jump start a car, first, pop the hood.
To know the dealio. The dealio of life.
To know the dealio. The dealio of life.
To protect myself and my fellow employees.
To protect myself and my fellow employees.
To steal someone's personal property and hide it from them.
To steal someone's personal property and hide it from them.
Toby is the worst human being I've ever known.
Toby is the worst human being I've ever known.
Toby, come on, let's go.
Toby, come on, let's go.
Today? All right, well, if you want to do it today,
Today? All right, well, if you want to do it today,
TODD: I have a full day of sales calls.
TODD: I have a full day of sales calls.
Top won't go up!
Top won't go up!
Totally throws them off.
Totally throws them off.
Turn off the music, because this is wrong
Turn off the music, because this is wrong
Under no circumstance should a man
Under no circumstance should a man
Usher Jennifer Hudson Kapour.
Usher Jennifer Hudson Kapour.
Wait a minute, you broke up our wedding for the guy.
Wait a minute, you broke up our wedding for the guy.
Wait. This is the entertainment?
Wait. This is the entertainment?
Walking around in your provocative outfits,
Walking around in your provocative outfits,
Walking out of the room unexpectedly.
Walking out of the room unexpectedly.
Was a Ben Franklin impersonator,
Was a Ben Franklin impersonator,
We are still going to be having two parties,
We are still going to be having two parties,
We can talk about that.
We can talk about that.
We even have the same top10 all time favorite movie list.
We even have the same top10 all time favorite movie list.
We gotta do something.
We gotta do something.
We had a funeral for a bird.
We had a funeral for a bird.
We hired you for three hours' work, and we're gonna get it.
We hired you for three hours' work, and we're gonna get it.
We need more attitude like that around this office.
We need more attitude like that around this office.
We should do it in person,
We should do it in person,
We'll see.
We'll see.
We're going to be doing some darts,
We're going to be doing some darts,
We're going to need to have a third party present.
We're going to need to have a third party present.
We're gonna be grilling up some steaks.
We're gonna be grilling up some steaks.
We're only one of Staples' top competitors in the area.
We're only one of Staples' top competitors in the area.
Welcome back, Oscar!
Welcome back, Oscar!
Welcome back. Thank you.
Welcome back. Thank you.
Well, actually, I never was President.
Well, actually, I never was President.
Well, are you gonna take care of this?
Well, are you gonna take care of this?
Well, don't talk to me about calling...
Well, don't talk to me about calling...
Well, draw me a map, mama.
Well, draw me a map, mama.
Well, get on it and make it happen.
Well, get on it and make it happen.
Well, good for Dwight.
Well, good for Dwight.
Well, I don't even think the stripper was that hot.
Well, I don't even think the stripper was that hot.
Well, I'd like to think that his dad
Well, I'd like to think that his dad
Well, I'm sensing a little electricity right here.
Well, I'm sensing a little electricity right here.
Well, in the future, please identify yourself as such.
Well, in the future, please identify yourself as such.
Well, it's simple, Mike.
Well, it's simple, Mike.
Well, Jim and I were talking.
Well, Jim and I were talking.
Well, that is a gray area of my life.
Well, that is a gray area of my life.
Well, that is because I am a Renaissance man.
Well, that is because I am a Renaissance man.
Well, that was funny. That's why.
Well, that was funny. That's why.
Well, that you kissed.
Well, that you kissed.
Well, that's how this company takes care of our employees!
Well, that's how this company takes care of our employees!
Well, that's interesting, Darryl.
Well, that's interesting, Darryl.
Well, then, my man meat he shall have.
Well, then, my man meat he shall have.
Well, those are very good points.
Well, those are very good points.
Well, we fired Roy, obviously.
Well, we fired Roy, obviously.
Well, what am I supposed to do?
Well, what am I supposed to do?
Well, what did you say?
Well, what did you say?
Well, when they merged the two branches together,
Well, when they merged the two branches together,
Well, who's laughing now?
Well, who's laughing now?
Well, you get the picture. Thanks, Pam.
Well, you get the picture. Thanks, Pam.
Well, you know, it happened so fast,
Well, you know, it happened so fast,
Well, you know, it happened so fast,
Well, you know, it happened so fast,
Well, you seem a little tired.
Well, you seem a little tired.
Well, you should just read the report that Toby did.
Well, you should just read the report that Toby did.
Well, you're very saucy.
Well, you're very saucy.
Well...
Well...
Were you going to tell me that you hired James Van Der Beek?
Were you going to tell me that you hired James Van Der Beek?
What about you, man, you comfortable?
What about you, man, you comfortable?
What about you, Phyllis? You and Dwight were close.
What about you, Phyllis? You and Dwight were close.
What are you sorry about?
What are you sorry about?
What are you sorry about?
What are you sorry about?
What are you writing, perv ball?
What are you writing, perv ball?
What did I tell you about "yeppers"?
What did I tell you about "yeppers"?
What do you mean you didn't order a stripper?
What do you mean you didn't order a stripper?
What do you mean?
What do you mean?
What do you think of Andy?
What do you think of Andy?
What do you think, redhead or brunette?
What do you think, redhead or brunette?
What does that even mean? That is impossible.
What does that even mean? That is impossible.
What does that mean?
What does that mean?
What happened, exactly?
What happened, exactly?
What happened? What?
What happened? What?
What I'm saying is that...
What I'm saying is that...
What if he's a murderer?
What if he's a murderer?
What is the situation, Toby?
What is the situation, Toby?
What, you're not even going to try to go out with him?
What, you're not even going to try to go out with him?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What? I can't hear you.
What? I can't hear you.
What? I talked to corporate
What? I talked to corporate
What? What?
What? What?
What... We will demonstrate on Pam.
What... We will demonstrate on Pam.
What're you doing later? You wanna hang out?
What're you doing later? You wanna hang out?
What're you talking about?
What're you talking about?
What's going on?
What's going on?
What's that?
What's that?
What's this?
What's this?
What's up, spinsters?
What's up, spinsters?
What's up, spinsters?
What's up, spinsters?
What's what? "Certificate of Bravery
What's what? "Certificate of Bravery
What's wrong with you?
What's wrong with you?
What's your angle?
What's your angle?
When Han Solo returns to the Death Star in the Millennium Falcon,
When Han Solo returns to the Death Star in the Millennium Falcon,
When I get eight hours compared to like, six hours,
When I get eight hours compared to like, six hours,
When I heard Jim and Pam had kissed,
When I heard Jim and Pam had kissed,
When I was five years old, I had those Spiderman pijamas.
When I was five years old, I had those Spiderman pijamas.
When it inevitably goes to trial.
When it inevitably goes to trial.
When the phone rings, answer it.
When the phone rings, answer it.
When the time comes, which won't be hard,
When the time comes, which won't be hard,
When we settle, we settle high!
When we settle, we settle high!
When... When did... When, last night?
When... When did... When, last night?
Whenever.
Whenever.
Where are you going? Want me to come with?
Where are you going? Want me to come with?
Where did you get this stuff?
Where did you get this stuff?
Where is my freaking phone?
Where is my freaking phone?
Where? Where?
Where? Where?
Where'd you get that?
Where'd you get that?
Where're you going? Bathroom.
Where're you going? Bathroom.
Which is Ebonics for being in my face and annoying the bejesus out of me.
Which is Ebonics for being in my face and annoying the bejesus out of me.
Which is like... Right on. Pam was like, "Blah, blah, blah,"
Which is like... Right on. Pam was like, "Blah, blah, blah,"
Which is where?
Which is where?
Which isle?
Which isle?
Who is also my friend.
Who is also my friend.
Who is the boy toy?
Who is the boy toy?
Who is the king of Austria? Joseph II.
Who is the king of Austria? Joseph II.
Who is the king of England?
Who is the king of England?
Who is the king of Prussia? Friedrich Wilhelm III.
Who is the king of Prussia? Friedrich Wilhelm III.
Who loves this place so much he punched a hole in it.
Who loves this place so much he punched a hole in it.
Who makes it?
Who makes it?
Who wants some man meat?
Who wants some man meat?
Who, here, is a history buff?
Who, here, is a history buff?
Who's a fan of buff naked?
Who's a fan of buff naked?
Why can't I just tell you?
Why can't I just tell you?
Why don't you have me riding in on a donkey into the office, Michael?
Why don't you have me riding in on a donkey into the office, Michael?
Why don't you just take that pen and stab me in the heart?
Why don't you just take that pen and stab me in the heart?
Why don't you tell me why you think you deserve a raise.
Why don't you tell me why you think you deserve a raise.
Why would Dwight do that for you?
Why would Dwight do that for you?
Why, the tyrant, King George, of course!
Why, the tyrant, King George, of course!
Wikipedia is the best thing ever.
Wikipedia is the best thing ever.
Wikipedia.
Wikipedia.
Win, win, win.
Win, win, win.
Wings, shots, drunk. Waitresses, hot.
Wings, shots, drunk. Waitresses, hot.
With one of your business school friends.
With one of your business school friends.
Without further ado,
Without further ado,
Would do that for anyone here.
Would do that for anyone here.
Would that be good? A burro.
Would that be good? A burro.
Would you like to join the Party Planning Committee?
Would you like to join the Party Planning Committee?
Would you like to pull a prank on Andy?
Would you like to pull a prank on Andy?
Would you stop it, please?
Would you stop it, please?
Wow, thank you.
Wow, thank you.
Wow, thank you.
Wow, thank you.
Wow, that's... Thanks so much.
Wow, that's... Thanks so much.
Wow, what is wrong with this thing? It looks terrible.
Wow, what is wrong with this thing? It looks terrible.
Wow, wow, wow.
Wow, wow, wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow. I guess word got around. That's a nice honor.
Wow. I guess word got around. That's a nice honor.
Yeah, all right, so, I want you to give him
Yeah, all right, so, I want you to give him
Yeah, he look like Hillary Clinton.
Yeah, he look like Hillary Clinton.
Yeah, I know I should.
Yeah, I know I should.
Yeah, let's do it! Let's do this thing.
Yeah, let's do it! Let's do this thing.
Yeah, let's go to the conference room.
Yeah, let's go to the conference room.
Yeah, me neither.
Yeah, me neither.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, she probably... Yeah, she would be.
Yeah, she probably... Yeah, she would be.
Yeah, that's me.
Yeah, that's me.
Yeah, well,
Yeah, well,
Yeah, well, I guess there's been a couple of late nights.
Yeah, well, I guess there's been a couple of late nights.
Yeah, you should not encourage him.
Yeah, you should not encourage him.
Yeah, you should.
Yeah, you should.
Yeah, you're right.
Yeah, you're right.
Yeah? I lose my appetite all the time
Yeah? I lose my appetite all the time
Yeah? I thought of that like two seconds after you left.
Yeah? I thought of that like two seconds after you left.
Yeah? What do I...
Yeah? What do I...
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. I heard how much Michael makes.
Yeah. I heard how much Michael makes.
Yeah. Oh, you know what? Ask them about the toys on my desk, too.
Yeah. Oh, you know what? Ask them about the toys on my desk, too.
Yeah. Sure? Okay.
Yeah. Sure? Okay.
Yeah. Yeah, I'll leave right away.
Yeah. Yeah, I'll leave right away.
Yep, SpongeBob SquarePants.
Yep, SpongeBob SquarePants.
Yeppers.
Yeppers.
Yes, but Ben Franklin was.
Yes, but Ben Franklin was.
Yes, but I don't.
Yes, but I don't.
Yes, but I got all the foot off of it.
Yes, but I got all the foot off of it.
Yes, Dwight Schrute has left the company. More personnel turnover.
Yes, Dwight Schrute has left the company. More personnel turnover.
Yes, he did.
Yes, he did.
Yes, I kind of arranged it.
Yes, I kind of arranged it.
Yes, sir. Remember that.
Yes, sir. Remember that.
Yes, yeah. Absolutely. Have a seat.
Yes, yeah. Absolutely. Have a seat.
Yes, you do, Ryan Bailey Howard.
Yes, you do, Ryan Bailey Howard.
Yes!
Yes!
Yes?
Yes?
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes. I'm bringing Darryl.
Yes. I'm bringing Darryl.
Yes. That's probably what it is.
Yes. That's probably what it is.
Yesh.
Yesh.
Yesterday, I was scraping some gunk
Yesterday, I was scraping some gunk
Yikes.
Yikes.
You are the best GD girlfriend in the world. Do you know that?
You are the best GD girlfriend in the world. Do you know that?
You are. You are.
You are. You are.
You called me stupid. No. I said...
You called me stupid. No. I said...
You could strip, you know.
You could strip, you know.
You did this for me?
You did this for me?
You didn't hear?
You didn't hear?
You do not try tactic number eight on me.
You do not try tactic number eight on me.
You don't know what it is.
You don't know what it is.
You don't know who Lance Bass is?
You don't know who Lance Bass is?
You ever even been to a bachelor party?
You ever even been to a bachelor party?
You give me a good raise or no more sex.
You give me a good raise or no more sex.
You gonna answer it?
You gonna answer it?
You got to call your girl and get paid.
You got to call your girl and get paid.
You just twist your hand until something breaks.
You just twist your hand until something breaks.
You know what I find sexy? Pam's art.
You know what I find sexy? Pam's art.
You know what you're doing.
You know what you're doing.
You know what, actually, let's go into the conference room.
You know what, actually, let's go into the conference room.
You know what, Dwight, do you want to do this or no?
You know what, Dwight, do you want to do this or no?
You know what, I deserve a bump.
You know what, I deserve a bump.
You know what, I should.
You know what, I should.
You know what, Pam, would you please
You know what, Pam, would you please
You know what? Maybe it's in the ceiling.
You know what? Maybe it's in the ceiling.
You know what? Maybe you're in the ceiling.
You know what? Maybe you're in the ceiling.
You know what? Okay. Excuse me.
You know what? Okay. Excuse me.
You know who's a real hero?
You know who's a real hero?
You know, I invented electricity.
You know, I invented electricity.
You know, Michael, I fathered an illegitimate son.
You know, Michael, I fathered an illegitimate son.
You know, not like, "I'm going to hurt you."
You know, not like, "I'm going to hurt you."
You know, Ryan, I'm...
You know, Ryan, I'm...
You know, this is a luncheon shower.
You know, this is a luncheon shower.
You know, this is a luncheon shower.
You know, this is a luncheon shower.
You know, why don't we just take a break?
You know, why don't we just take a break?
You know...
You know...
You make a very compelling argument.
You make a very compelling argument.
You must have been scared out of your mind.
You must have been scared out of your mind.
You ready for me?
You ready for me?
You really enjoying your fiesta? Actually, yeah.
You really enjoying your fiesta? Actually, yeah.
You said...
You said...
You saw it?
You saw it?
You sell those two printers this morning? Nice work.
You sell those two printers this morning? Nice work.
You should come back. Please.
You should come back. Please.
You should definitely go out with Jim.
You should definitely go out with Jim.
You should get more sleep.
You should get more sleep.
You should get out of them.
You should get out of them.
You should get out of them.
You should get out of them.
You smell like Tide detergent.
You smell like Tide detergent.
You smell nice, like Tide
You smell nice, like Tide
You want me to answer phones with my clothes on?
You want me to answer phones with my clothes on?
You wearing a thong?
You wearing a thong?
You went to a bachelor party at work?
You went to a bachelor party at work?
You would have left me to fend for myself.
You would have left me to fend for myself.
You would rather sit on your couch and watch a Phillies game
You would rather sit on your couch and watch a Phillies game
You, me, bar, beers, buzzed.
You, me, bar, beers, buzzed.
You're dating him, which is awesome,
You're dating him, which is awesome,
You're going to play it like this?
You're going to play it like this?
You're going to suck it up. Here we go.
You're going to suck it up. Here we go.
You're not real man!
You're not real man!
You're useless.
You're useless.
You're wearing a woman's suit? No.
You're wearing a woman's suit? No.
You've been here ten years, dawg.
You've been here ten years, dawg.
You've got to get out there and earn, son.
You've got to get out there and earn, son.
You've got to get your REM cycle
You've got to get your REM cycle
Your gayness does not define you.
Your gayness does not define you.
Your Mexicanness is what defines you to me.
Your Mexicanness is what defines you to me.
Your undivided attention.
Your undivided attention.
Zombie
Zombie
Zombie
Zombie
Zombie, Zombie
Zombie, Zombie
2:30 to 3:15. It's gonna be great.
2:30 to 3:15. It's gonna be great.
2:30 to 3:15. It's gonna be great.
2:30 to 3:15. It's gonna be great.
185 pounder. Check it out.
185 pounder. Check it out.
...and we need someone else in the room...
...and we need someone else in the room...
...because of our relationship. Michael!
...because of our relationship. Michael!
...to tell you that I love you.
...to tell you that I love you.
...well you really gonna rock tonight
...well you really gonna rock tonight
...will never say a word.
...will never say a word.
"Dwight K. Schrute."
"Dwight K. Schrute."
"Hey, everybody, it's me, Jim."
"Hey, everybody, it's me, Jim."
"Is she hot?"
"Is she hot?"
"recognizing outstanding citizenship from a very brave young man,
"recognizing outstanding citizenship from a very brave young man,
"Secrets, secrets are no fun.
"Secrets, secrets are no fun.
"Secrets, secrets hurt someone."
"Secrets, secrets hurt someone."
"Thank you" not necessary and thus not accepted.
"Thank you" not necessary and thus not accepted.
"Was" the top salesman. I said was.
"Was" the top salesman. I said was.
"you know what, keep talking. I'd really love a home theater."
"you know what, keep talking. I'd really love a home theater."
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT) First...
(CLEARING THROAT) First...
(DARRYL LAUGHING)
(DARRYL LAUGHING)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTS)
(JIM COUGHING)
(JIM COUGHING)
(KAREN SCREAMING) Roy! Roy!
(KAREN SCREAMING) Roy! Roy!
(KNOCK ON DOOR) Yeah?
(KNOCK ON DOOR) Yeah?
(MICHAEL MUMBLES)
(MICHAEL MUMBLES)
(MICHAEL READING)
(MICHAEL READING)
(MIMICKING FISHING ROD)
(MIMICKING FISHING ROD)
(MUMBLES)
(MUMBLES)
(MUMBLES)
(MUMBLES)
(MUMBLING)
(MUMBLING)
(MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)
(MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)
(MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)
(MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)
(MUSIC PLAYING ON CELL PHONE)
(MUSIC PLAYING ON CELL PHONE)
(MUSIC PLAYING ON CELL PHONE)
(MUSIC PLAYING ON CELL PHONE)
(MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
(MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
(MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)
(MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)
(MUSIC PLAYING)
(MUSIC PLAYING)
(PHONE RINGING) Then what did he do?
(PHONE RINGING) Then what did he do?
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SINGING) Andy and the Tuna
(SINGING) Andy and the Tuna
(SINGING) In your head
(SINGING) In your head
(WHOOPING)
(WHOOPING)
(YELLING)
(YELLING)

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