The Brady Bunch - Season 5 Edit

A AND A REAL FATHER AND A REAL MOTHER.

A AND WEAR THE SAME AS ME.

A APIECE. MMM HMM.

A BABY! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

A BABY?

A BABY? ARE YOU SURE?

A BOTTLE OF NEAT AND NATURAL HAIR TONIC.

A BOTTLE OF NEAT AND NATURAL HAIR TONIC.

A BUCK'S ANOTHER.

A CHILDREN'S RECORD ALBUM?

A CHOP HERE, A KICK THERE.

A COUPLE MINUTES MORE IN THERE AND I COULD'VE SUFFOCATED. SEE?

A COUPLE OF EXTRA PACKAGES OF RICE, ALICE.

A COUPLE OF IDEAS THAT I HAVE HERE. HUH?

A COUPLE OF MINUTES AGO.

A DEFINITE WAR IS ABOUT TO BEGIN.

A DOUBLE DATE? WITH A GIRL AND EVERYTHING?

A DOUBLE.

A FAVOR OF MR. BRADY?

A FINK.

A FLAVOR FAVOR.

A FOOTBALL GAME ONLY LASTS 60 MINUTES.

A FRIENDLY ENEMY.

A GIRL CAN SPEND AS MUCH TIME IN THE BATHROOM AS SHE LIKES.

A GIRL?

A GOAT?

A GOAT.

A GOOD IDEA, DARLING.

A GOOD PIZZA PLACE OR NOT.

A GUY CAN'T GET ANY SLEEP AROUND HERE.

A JINX?

A JOB AT THE LEANING TOWER OF PIZZA PARLOR.

A LEGEND IN YOUR OWN TIME. WHAT A GREAT NEW IMAGE!

A MONUMENT TO ITS BENEFACTOR.

A PRESENT?

A PRETTY FANCY MEAL FOR MR. AND MRS. MATHEWS.

A PUT ON, EH?

A RASH? FROM WHAT?

A REAL, LIVE UNIDENTIFIED FLYING OBJECT!

A REALLY BIG FAVOR?

A RECIPE WITH MEAT IN IT.

A RECORD ALBUM.

A SALESMAN'S A PEDDLER. NOW SCRAM. HEY!

A SET OF FIRST EDITION BOOKS THAT COST $200.

A SPECIAL ON LAMB CHOPS? HOW MUCH?

A SUCKER BET.

A SURPRISE PARTY, HUH?

A TALENT SCOUT? SHIRLEY TEMPLE?

A WHAT?

A WHITE T SHIRT AND BLUE JEANS. OK?

AAGH! CINDY. CINDY, CAN YOU GRAB THE 2 BOTTOM ONES? BOTTOM ONES...

ABOUT DWAYNE AND STEVE

ABOUT DWAYNE AND STEVIE.

ABOUT GOING TO THE MOVIE STUDIO.

ABOUT JOE NAMATH?

ABOUT LOW COST HOUSING, DIDN'T YOU?

ABOUT MARCIA'S PROBLEM.

ABOUT ME IN HER DIARY. OK.

ABOUT ME, MAYBE?

ABOUT OUR BET.

ABOUT SAM, THE BUTCHER.

ABOUT THAT NEAT AND NATURAL HAIR TONIC COMPANY.

ABOUT THE AUDIENCE IN THEIR UNDERWEAR?

ABOUT WHAT?

ABOUT WHAT?

ABOUT WHAT?

ABOUT WHAT? ROUTINE SPIES?

ABOUT, UH, ABOUT... AH!

ABSOLUTELY LOVES, AND THAT HE CAN REALLY USE.

ACCORDING TO THE LAWS OF HEREDITY, SHE COULD LOOK LIKE...

ACROSS THE TABLE, AND INTO THE SIDE POCKET.

ADIOS, JOHNNY BRAVO.

ADOPT ANOTHER KID?

ADVANCED TO THE FINALS IN THE BOWLING TOURNAMENT.

AFRAID NOT. BRADY PACKAGE.

AFTER ALL, THE BATHROOM IS CONNECTED TO THE BEDROOM

AFTER ALL, THOSE PLANS YOU DREW UP FOR THE WHITLEY PROJECT,

AFTER MAKING ALL THAT MONEY BABY SITTING FOR HER FOLKS.

AFTER THOSE TALKS WITH YOU AND MIKE...

AFTER TOMORROW, HE'S OUR SON.

AFTER WE PAINTED OUR BEDROOM.

AFTER WHAT I PULLED OFF TONIGHT, I'M READY TO SOLO.

AFTER WORKING ALL WEEK, I'M GOING TO HAVE TO DO MY HOMEWORK

AFTER YOU COMPLETE THE COURSE,

AFTER YOU MAKE THAT SPEECH, HOW ABOUT BEING MY DATE AT THE DANCE?

AFTER YOU'VE POLISHED MY SHOES, MADE MY BED,

AH AH AH, YOU HAD YOUR DINNER.

AH, AH, AH!

AH, BEAT ME HOME, HUH?

AH, BUENAS NOCHES SENOR CALDERON Y SENORA.

AH, BUT YES, THERE IS.

AH, MY FAIR QUEEN.

AH, MY QUEEN,

AH, POOR THING. TOO BAD SHE'S A LOSER.

AH, THAT'S ONE RERUN I'M REALLY GONNA ENJOY. YUP.

AH, WELL, JUST CHALK IT UP TO EXPERIENCE.

AH, YEAH. OH! ARE YOU IN LUCK!

AH, YES!

AH.

AH. SEE? HE'S ALL TALK, ALICE.

AH. WELL, IT'S OFF TO SEE OUR AGENT. OH, GOOD LUCK.

AH...

AHA!

AHA.

AHEM. YES, YES, YES.

AIN'T SHE OUTTA SIGHT?

ALBUM LINERS, BILLBOARDS...

ALERT THE AIR DEFENSE COMMAND IMMEDIATELY.

ALICE AND I

ALICE AND I WILL EAT OUR SHARE.

ALICE AND SAM ARE ELOPING.

ALICE AND SAM?

ALICE AND SAM.

ALICE ASKED US TO STOP BY AFTER SCHOOL

ALICE HAS TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE.

ALICE IS REALLY SORRY ABOUT EVERYTHING.

ALICE MEANS A GREAT DEAL TO US.

ALICE NELSON, THIS IS MRS. HARRIS.

ALICE OPENS THE DOOR AND SKYROCKETS GO OFF.

ALICE WAS TELLIN' US THAT YOU WERE IN THE ARMY.

ALICE,

ALICE, ALICE!

ALICE, CONGRATULATIONS! THAT'S WONDERFUL.

ALICE, COULD YOU GET US SOME TEA, PLEASE?

ALICE, DID I GET A PHONE CALL FROM A GUY NAMED RICHIE?

ALICE, HERE'S A NOTE.

ALICE, HOW CAN YOU NOT THINK ABOUT IT?

ALICE, I THINK IT'S FANTASTIC

ALICE, I TOLD YOU THIS WAS A BIG SECRET. WILL YOU SHUSH?

ALICE, I'M DYING TO KNOW WHAT'S INSIDE.

ALICE, I'M SORRY. WE THOUGHT...

ALICE, IS BOBBY THERE?

ALICE, LOOK, THERE REALLY IS SOMETHING ON THAT FILM. LOOK, RIGHT THERE.

ALICE, LOOK, WE'RE NOT JUST DESTINED FOR GROUND ROUND.

ALICE, MR. BRADY IS FAMISHED.

ALICE, MY HUSBAND HAS JUST PAID ME A VERY BIG COMPLIMENT.

ALICE, NOW, YOU JUST RELAX. WE'LL KEEP THE HOUSE NEAT AND TIDY.

ALICE, OF COURSE YOU CAN HAVE SATURDAY NIGHT OFF.

ALICE, SAY NO MORE.

ALICE, THANK YOU.

ALICE, THAT IS THE WORST THING I'VE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE.

ALICE, THAT WAS THE BEST BALL GAME I'VE EVER SEEN.

ALICE, THIS IS VERY SWEET OF YOU.

ALICE, UH, IF YOU'RE THINKING OF THE WEDDING MARCH,

ALICE, WE COULDN'T BE HAPPIER ABOUT YOUR BOWLING DATE.

ALICE, WE COULDN'T BE HAPPIER.

ALICE, WE'RE NOT JUST TALKING ABOUT BOWLING.

ALICE, WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THAT?

ALICE, WHAT WILL THE CHILDREN THINK?

ALICE, WHAT'S FOR DESSERT?

ALICE, WILL YOU PLEASE MAKE IT QUICK?

ALICE, YOU AIN'T SEEN NOTHING YET.

ALICE, YOU CERTAINLY FEED US WELL.

ALICE, YOU DON'T HAVE TO PRETEND ANYMORE.

ALICE, YOU DON'T SUPPOSE...

ALICE!

ALICE! ALICE! WE FOUND DAD'S SKETCHES.

ALICE! HI, MRS. BRADY.

ALICE?

ALICE?

ALICE?

ALICE? HMM?

ALICE.

ALICE.

ALICE. I NOT ONLY INSIST, I DEMAND TO KNOW.

ALL 6 OF US GET AN OUTFIT LIKE THIS?

ALL BY YOURSELF?

ALL CLEAR OF BOYS.

ALL CLEAR, COME ON.

ALL I DID WAS OPEN THE DOOR.

ALL I'M INTERESTED IN IS A DESIGN

ALL OF MY HARD WORK FINALLY PAID OFF.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, WHO'S THE NEXT VICTIM, HUH?

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. WHY WOULD BOBBY SAY IT IF HE DIDN'T SEE IT?

ALL RIGHT, GENTLY.

ALL RIGHT, MARCIA, ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT, MISS BRADY, YOU CAN START THE CAR NOW.

ALL RIGHT, NOW, IT STARTS WITH A SOFT SHOE STEP.

ALL RIGHT, NOW, WHICH ONE IS WHICH?

ALL RIGHT, READY?

ALL RIGHT, SELMA. SO LONG.

ALL RIGHT, SO THAT'S THE WAY IT IS, HUH?

ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT, THAT'S IT.

ALL RIGHT, THEN YOU HAVE NOTHIN' TO WORRY ABOUT.

ALL RIGHT, WE ACCEPT YOUR OFFER.

ALL RIGHT, WE'LL ALLOW ABOUT, UH, 4 POUNDS FOR CLOTHES.

ALL RIGHT, YOU TWO KIDS, COOL IT.

ALL RIGHT!

ALL RIGHT!

ALL RIGHT!

ALL RIGHT! HEY!

ALL RIGHT?

ALL RIGHT? ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT.

ALL SET, MISS BRADY?

ALL THE GUYS ARE EXPECTING TO MEET ME UP THERE.

ALL THE GUYS WERE BRAGGIN' ABOUT KNOWING SUPERSTARS.

ALL THE MONEY I SPENT PREPARING ALL THIS GLUCK.

ALL THE NERVE OUT OF A GUY.

ALL THE OTHER KIDS LEFT FOR SCHOOL.

ALL THE PROBLEMS YOU COULD HAVE CAUSED

ALL THE WAY TO THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE FOR A CHECKUP.

ALL THESE? UH HUH.

ALL YOU BOYS THINK ABOUT IS FOOTBALL.

ALL'S QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONTS.

ALONE?

ALSO, ANYBODY WHO THINKS THAT BOWLING BALLS MAKE A ROTTEN WEDDING GIFT

ALWAYS KEEP YOUR EYE ON HIS BELT BUCKLE.

AM GONNA BE BOBBY BRADY'S SLAVE FOR LIFE.

AN ADOPTED CHILD.

AN APPLE, 2 CRACKERS AND A LITTLE PIECE OF CHEESE?

AN ELECTRIC POPCORN POPPER.

AN F.B.I. MAN WAS HERE? IN THIS HOUSE?

AN IMPORTANT CLIENT?

AN INCH AND A HALF? RIGHT.

AN INCH AND A HALF.

AN OLDER FEMALE WHAT?

AND 'CAUSE YOU DIDN'T GET TO GO ON YOUR LONG WEEKEND OR TAKE YOUR 2ND HONEYMOON.

AND "DID" MEANS, UH, DID.

AND 2,

AND 2, YOU DON'T TRY TO BE SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT.

AND 3...

AND A BASEBALL PLAYER,

AND A BRADY NEVER GOES BACK ON HIS PROMISE. RIGHT, JAN?

AND A CARLOAD OF THAT HAIR TONIC...

AND A COWBOY, AND AN ASTRONAUT.

AND A FIREMAN,

AND A LITTLE BIT OF HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE.

AND A TWITCHY LITTLE NOSE.

AND ABOUT A HALF A DOZEN DWARFS.

AND ACTION.

AND ALICE IS THE PERSON TO ASK.

AND ALL I'M QUALIFIED TO DO IS FILL OUT JOB APPLICATIONS.

AND ALL THE OTHER KIDS AT THE HOME.

AND ALSO, THAT I, PETER BRADY,

AND AN EMPLOYER HAS TO TAKE CARE OF HIS BEST WORKERS, RIGHT?

AND ANY OTHER ORGANIZATION.

AND ANYTHING ELSE IS TRIVIA.

AND ARCHITECTS BUILD THINGS

AND ARTHUR KEPT HIS DATE WITH PAMELA IN THE SECOND PLACE.

AND AS FOR YOU, YOUNG MAN. YES, SIR?

AND AS LONG AS I'M HERE, WHY DON'T WE GO THROW A FEW PASSES TOGETHER?

AND AS MUCH EDUCATION AS HE IS CAPABLE OF.

AND BE CAREFUL WITH THESE. THEY'RE SUEDE.

AND BE GIVEN A NEW CHANCE AT LIFE.

AND BECAUSE HE WAS GOING TO BE OUT OF TOWN.

AND BESIDES YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT US BUTTING IN

AND BESIDES, I'M SO HUNGRY I COULD EAT AN ELEPHANT.

AND BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER.

AND BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER.

AND BOBBY PUSHED ME OUT OF THE WAY

AND BOBBY PUT A $3 DEPOSIT ON A SKATEBOARD.

AND BY FRIDAY NIGHT YOU'LL BE YEARS AHEAD OF ANY GUY YOUR AGE.

AND CAMPAIGN HARD.

AND CAN I HAVE THE KEYS TO THE CAR?

AND CANCEL THAT ORDER. WHAT ORDER, ALICE?

AND CHANGE HER FOR THAT BEAR CUB.

AND COFFEE. WHEN YOU'RE HOT, YOU'RE HOT.

AND DELIVER A SPEECH LIKE THAT.

AND DON'T BLAME ME IF YOU GET A RASH.

AND DON'T FORGET AUTOGRAPHS.

AND DON'T MAKE A MOVE FOR YOUR GUN.

AND DON'T WORRY.

AND DON'T WORRY. WE WOMEN WON'T LET YOU DOWN.

AND DRINKS LATER. SEE YOU LATER, FRANCES.

AND ESPECIALLY ERIC PARKER,

AND EVERYBODY ELSE WHO HELPED. OH, YEAH.

AND GET HER OUT WITHOUT ANYONE FINDING OUT.

AND GO SOMEPLACE ELSE.

AND GO TO COLLEGE AT THE SAME TIME?

AND GOT SOME POINTERS FROM THE KID...

AND GREG DESERTED US.

AND GUESS WHO MADE ALL AMERICAN?

AND HAD A LONG WHITE TUBE STICKING OUT OF IT.

AND HAVE COPIES OF THE SKETCHES SENT IN NO TIME AT ALL.

AND HAVE HER INVITE JERRY OVER TOMORROW.

AND HAVE I GOT SOME FOR YOU.

AND HAVE WE GOT A SURPRISE FOR THEM.

AND HE DOES NEED A JOB.

AND HE DOESN'T KNOW THAT YOU THINK THAT HE...

AND HE STOOD RIGHT NEXT TO HIM.

AND HE WAS PETRIFIED. I'M WITH HIM.

AND HE WENT 1,200 MILES OUT OF HIS WAY

AND HE'D BUILD THE SETS FOR YOU. IS THAT RIGHT?

AND HE'S HOUSEBROKEN.

AND HE'S JUST COMING TO LIVE WITH US FOR A WHILE.

AND HE'S TAKING PAULINE WITH HIM.

AND HEAD TO SCHOOL, OK? NO, BUT I'LL DO IT.

AND HER 3 MINUTES WERE UP ABOUT 2 HOURS AGO.

AND HERE I AM AS STUDENT BODY PRESIDENT.

AND HERE'S A BRAND NEW TOOTHBRUSH FOR YOU.

AND HERE'S THE OLD TANKER.

AND HOW MUCH I LIKE BEING HERE WITH EVERYBODY.

AND HUNG THERE IN SPACE, I'D BE LITTLE, GREEN PEOPLE, TOO.

AND I ALWAYS FELL RIGHT FLAT ON MY HOPE CHEST.

AND I DEVELOPED THEM, CAPTAIN.

AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKIN' ABOUT.

AND I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT'S WITH HIS FRIEND, PHIL.

AND I FELL IN THAT ROSE BUSH.

AND I GET TO BE PRINCE CHARMING, I'LL CONSIDER IT.

AND I GOT A SURPRISE FOR YOU.

AND I GOT SUSPENDED FOR A WEEK.

AND I HAVE A FAST HALF HOUR FOR A MEETING

AND I HAVE TO BE CLEARED BY THE AGENCY INVOLVED BEFORE I CAN WORK ON IT.

AND I HAVEN'T EVEN RECORDED IT YET.

AND I HOPE THE ANSWER'S A GOOD ONE

AND I JUST LOST MY APPETITE.

AND I JUST WANTED TO SHOW MY APPRECIATION, THAT'S ALL.

AND I KNOW SHE'S GOING TO HAVE MR. PAYNE

AND I MADE SOME DUMB NOISES.

AND I NEED ALL THE PRACTICE I CAN GET.

AND I NEVER GET... BUT YOU REPORTED IT TO YOUR OFFICE, CAPTAIN.

AND I OWN THAT HOTEL, TOO,

AND I PREDICT THAT YOU TWO ARE GREAT PREDICTORS.

AND I PROMISED HIM I WOULDN'T. I GAVE HIM MY WORD.

AND I REALLY APPRECIATE IT.

AND I REALLY WANTED TO DANCE.

AND I REALLY WANTED TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

AND I SHARE THEIR OPINION.

AND I SMASHED IT WITH THE HAMMER.

AND I SWORE THEM TO SECRECY.

AND I THOUGHT YOU'D ALL LIKE TO GO WITH ME.

AND I TOOK IT ON THE RUN.

AND I USED A VERY HEAVY DRESSING.

AND I WALTZED OUT, NEAT AS A PIN.

AND I WANT HIM TO GO TO COLLEGE.

AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT NO MATTER WHAT IT COSTS,

AND I WAS GOING TO BE A BASKETBALL STAR ON KAPLUTUS.

AND I WAS ON MY WAY BACK TO THE PLATOON, SEE,

AND I WENT WITH THEM 'CAUSE WE'RE THE 3 MUSKETEERS.

AND I WILL NEVER DO IT AGAIN.

AND I'D BE EVEN BETTER IF I KNEW WHAT TO DO.

AND I'D LIKE 'EM SHINED, POLISHED, AND RETURNED TO ME

AND I'D LIKE TO SHOW YOU THE KITCHEN...

AND I'D LIKE YOU ALL TO HEAR IT BECAUSE IT CONCERNS YOU.

AND I'LL BET YOUR COACH WOULD AGREE, TOO.

AND I'LL CALL MR. MATHEWS.

AND I'LL CLIP THE STUPID HEDGES.

AND I'LL DO LIKEWISE WITH THE GREEN PAINT.

AND I'LL DO MY THING OVER HERE.

AND I'LL DRIVE JAN AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD,

AND I'LL EVEN LET HER BRING JAN, BOBBY, CINDY, AND OLIVER WITH HER.

AND I'LL GET BACK TO YOU, OK?

AND I'LL MEET YOU OUT BACK IN A COUPLE OF HOURS.

AND I'LL SWITCH 'EM AROUND HERE IN THIS PHONY ONE.

AND I'LL TELL YOU, I WOULDN'T WANNA GET UP IN FRONT OF MY CLASSMATES

AND I'M 12 YEARS OLD.

AND I'M AFRAID I MIGHT.

AND I'M DESPERATE.

AND I'M GETTING A REJECTION COMPLEX.

AND I'M GOING ON A FLYING SAUCER.

AND I'M GOING TO KEEP MY OTHER DATE WITH MICHELLE.

AND I'M GONNA DO IT EVERY DAY FOR YOU.

AND I'M GONNA FIND OUT JUST WHAT IT IS.

AND I'M GONNA NEED ALL THE HELP I CAN GET

AND I'M HELPIN' 'EM.

AND I'M IN CHARGE OF BUYING A GIFT. GOT ANY SUGGESTIONS?

AND I'M NOT EVEN IN HIGH SCHOOL YET.

AND I'M NOT GOING.

AND I'M ONE OF THE OTHERS.

AND I'M REAL GOOD AT POOL. RIGHT, OLIVER?

AND I'VE GOT A PAINTING TO PROVE IT.

AND IF 2 PEOPLE ARE GONNA HAVE ANY KIND OF A RELATIONSHIP AT ALL,

AND IF IT HAD BEEN THE REAL ONE,

AND IF IT SHOWS UP, WE'LL HAVE ALL THE PROOF WE NEED.

AND IF SAM GETS A HOLD OF HIM...

AND IF SHE WERE MY DAUGHTER,

AND IF THERE'S ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO FOR YOU, JUST NAME IT.

AND IF THERE'S ANYTHING I CAN DO FOR YOU, JUST NAME IT.

AND IF THERE'S EVER ANYTHING THAT I CAN DO FOR YOU, ANYTHING AT ALL, JUST ASK.

AND IF THEY DON'T, YOU GOT A GOOD SMEAR CAMPAIGN GOING.

AND IF YOU COULD...

AND IF YOU DO VOTE FOR ME, I'LL NEVER EVER FORGET IT.

AND IF YOU THINK WE'RE POLISHING YOUR SHOES

AND IF YOU WANT ANOTHER FRIEND FOR LIFE, LET ME MAKE A CALL, HUH?

AND IF YOUR COUSIN LOOKS ANYTHING LIKE YOU,

AND IF YOUR MOTHER FINDS OUT,

AND IT CAME OUT BEFORE I COULD STOP IT.

AND IT GOES AROUND AND AROUND.

AND IT MAY TAKE HIM A WHILE TO GET USED TO HAVING

AND IT WAS NICE MEETING ALL OF YOU. NICE MEETING YOU.

AND IT WENT SOFT.

AND IT'S A MESS. IT'S A BIG MESS.

AND IT'S GOING TO LOOK SO GOOD WITH YOUR DRESS. LOOK, THERE'S GREG.

AND IT'S THE ONLY RACE IN TOWN.

AND JAM IS A DOUBLE NO NO.

AND JOE, AND JULIE, AND HOPE,

AND JUST SO THERE WON'T BE ANY MISUNDERSTANDING...

AND JUST WHAT HAVE YOU GOT AGAINST WOMEN DRIVERS, YOUNG MAN?

AND JUST WHAT IS WRONG WITH OUR SPAGHETTI SAUCE?

AND KEEP ME OUT OF THE P.T.A.

AND KEEP THEIR CAGE CLEAN.

AND KICK US OUT OF HERE.

AND KNIVES AND SPOONS ON THE RIGHT.

AND LEARN.

AND LET HIM KNOW WHAT YOU FOUND OUT

AND LET THEM BELIEVE WHAT THEY WANT TO BELIEVE.

AND LIKING IT, TOO.

AND LOCKING SOMEBODY IN A FREEZER,

AND MADE ALL PRO 3 YEARS IN A ROW.

AND MAKE FRUIT SALAD OUT OF IT,

AND MAKE IT LOOK WORSE THAN IT IS?

AND MAKE UP WITH PETER RIGHT NOW.

AND MR. BRADY DREW UP THESE PLANS FOR ME.

AND MR. GRONSKY, HE'S MY LANDLORD,

AND MR. HASKELL WAS PUTTING UP A SIGN IN THE WINDOW:

AND MR. KELLER. IT'S VERY NICE TO MEET YOU.

AND MR. KIRBY WON'T BUY THEM BACK.

AND MR. KIRBY'S A FINK.

AND MR. PAYNE WON'T LET DAD BECOME AN OPTOMETRIST.

AND MY NEPHEW, OLIVER. THIS IS MR. SANDERS. HI.

AND MY SADDLE BROKE ABOUT A MILE BACK.

AND MY SEAT BELT IS FASTENED SO YOU CAN START THE CAR NOW.

AND MY SON, GREG. HI. HELLO, MRS. DINGLE.

AND NICE MEETING YOU, MRS. BRADY. THANK YOU. YOU, TOO.

AND NO BACKIN' OUT, A WHOLE MONTH.

AND NOW I WILL KNOCK THE 3 YELLOW BALLS

AND NOW I'D LIKE YOU TO SEE WHAT I THINK

AND NOW IT'S RUINED, AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT.

AND NOW PETER IS WORKING HIMSELF TO DEATH.

AND NOW WE'VE GOT A PROBLEM. WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?

AND NOW YOU'RE JUST DROPPING IT.

AND NOW, WE'D LIKE TO GIVE YOU OUR VERSION

AND ON CLOTHING UNDER CERTAIN CONDITIONS.

AND ONCE I SEE THE PLANS, I'LL HAVE AN IDEA

AND ONE FALLS RIGHT IN HER LAP.

AND ONE MORE LITTLE FAVOR, IF I COULD IMPOSE ON YOU? YEAH.

AND PEOPLE WHO ARE IN LOVE GET ENGAGED, RIGHT?

AND PICK UP THOSE "HIS" AND "HERS" BOWLING BALLS.

AND PRESTO. INSTANT U.F.O.

AND PRETEND YOU'RE A BOWLING BALL.

AND PROMISED TO BE MY SLAVE FOR LIFE.

AND RANDY, AND BARBARA, AND JEANNIE,

AND REALLY SUPER EGOTISTICAL ON OUR PART

AND RELIVE THOSE GOOD OLD DAYS.

AND SAID HE HAD A BIG SURPRISE FOR US.

AND SAM AND I ARE GONNA STAND UP FOR THE BRIDE AND GROOM.

AND SEE IF WE CAN STOP OVER AFTER PRACTICE?

AND SELL THEM FOR 25 CENTS APIECE.

AND SHAMPOO MY HAIR AND...

AND SHE SOLD OUT ONE SISTER FOR 29 FLAVORS!

AND SHE TURNED OUT TO BE AN AGENT.

AND SHE WANTS US TO PHONE HER IN THE MORNING.

AND SHE WAS ALL EXCITED ABOUT IT.

AND SHOULD MAKE MY OWN DECISIONS, RIGHT?

AND SO DO A LOT OF THE KIDS.

AND SOME VERY ROUGH ESTIMATES

AND SOMEDAY MR. HASKELL WILL MAKE ME HIS PARTNER.

AND SOMEONE WHO...

AND STEVE IS ORIENTAL

AND STOP THROWING MY OWN WORDS AT ME.

AND STRAIGHTEN THINGS UP A LITTLE. UH, NO, NOT NOW, ALICE.

AND STUFF LIKE THAT.

AND SUDDENLY, YOU BUST IN AND SAVE ME.

AND TAKES A LOOK AT THOSE PICTURES.

AND TELL PETER YOU'RE SORRY, OK?

AND TELL THEM TO STICK AROUND A WHILE.

AND TELL THEM WE'VE IDENTIFIED AN UNIDENTIFIED FLYING OBJECT.

AND TELL YOUR COUSIN CLARA TO BE AT THE HOUSE AT 8:00 PROMPTLY.

AND TELL YOUR FATHER WHAT YOU DID.

AND THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME STAY HERE WITH YOU GUYS.

AND THAT I REALLY DON'T THINK THAT WE SHOULD...

AND THAT IS A WALK IN LINEN CLOSET.

AND THAT IS THE UGLIEST NECKTIE I EVER SAW!

AND THAT SHE WANTS ME TO ENROLL IN HER ART CLASS.

AND THAT'S A LOVELY NECKTIE.

AND THAT'S A RACE YOU CAN'T QUIT.

AND THAT'S WHEN THE OLD TANKER

AND THE 9TH IS THE ONE MILLIONTH VISITOR

AND THE BANK ACCOUNT OF QUEEN ELIZABETH.

AND THE BOYS ARE WITH US NOW.

AND THE ENEMY.

AND THE GROUNDS ARE BEAUTIFUL!

AND THE HALLWAY IS CONNECTED TO THE BATHROOM

AND THE HAT! BOOM!

AND THE HAT. OK? OK.

AND THE LIGHTS WORK. OH, HONEY.

AND THE LITTLE FOUNTAINS SHOOT UP.

AND THE LITTLE, GREEN PEOPLE,

AND THE LOSER HAS TO DO THE WINNER'S CHORES FOR A WHOLE YEAR.

AND THE NEAT AND NATURAL COMPANY

AND THE PADDLE TURN.

AND THE PIECE DE RESISTANCE,

AND THE QUESTION IS, HOW DOES SHE GET IT BACK?

AND THE REST IS HISTORY.

AND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE TO BE A POOL CHAMPION.

AND THE SHOW IS NEWS EVENT,

AND THE SOFT SHOE, AND... [humming]

AND THE SPOILS INCLUDE PAYING THE MAN.

AND THE WAY THE LIGHT WAS SHINING ON THE WINDSHIELD,

AND THE... AND YOU'RE FORGETTING ONE THING.

AND THEIR BABIES HAVE BABIES AND THEN THEIR BABIES HAVE BABIES...

AND THEN COME RIGHT BACK OUT.

AND THEN HE GOES FOR THE BIG...

AND THEN HE'LL TELL US WHAT THE SURPRISE IS.

AND THEN I CHEAT ANYWAY.

AND THEN I GET THIS FLASHLIGHT AND THIS WHISTLE,

AND THEN I'LL THROW HER OUT OF THE HOUSE.

AND THEN I'M GONNA DRIVE HIM HOME WITH MY NEW LICENSE.

AND THEN IN A COUPLE OF YEARS, COLLEGE'LL FIT IN.

AND THEN IT JUST HUNG THERE IN SPACE.

AND THEN JUST HUNG THERE...

AND THEN LOCK HIM UP IN THAT FREEZER. YEAH.

AND THEN MOVE ALL THE FROZEN CARCASSES OUT OF THE MEAT LOCKER.

AND THEN SHE CAN PASS OUT THOSE COOKIES THAT ALICE MADE.

AND THEN THE HEALTH DEPARTMENT COMES OVER AND CONDEMNS OUR HOUSE.

AND THEN TO THE RIGHT. NOW, THE PADDLE TURN...

AND THEN WE'LL ALL DO IT TOGETHER, OK?

AND THEN YOU CAN BE ON YOUR WAY TO THE SPORTING GOODS STORE

AND THEN YOU START DOING MY CHORES. NO WAY, MR. MAN DRIVER.

AND THEN YOUR IDEA REALLY WORKED, DAD.

AND THERE ARE ONLY 6 OF US,

AND THERE AREN'T ANY SCHOOLS.

AND THERE IT IS. HOW DO YOU LIKE IT, GIRLS?

AND THERE'S ENOUGH ROOM FOR AN AUDIENCE THERE.

AND THEY DON'T WANT ANYBODY TO KNOW.

AND THEY SAID THAT EARTH COLORS ARE REALLY RESTFUL.

AND THEY SAID THEY'D GET A THEATER, SELL TICKETS, ANYTHING.

AND THEY'RE GONNA FREEZE YOU!

AND THEY'RE GONNA GO AHEAD WITH IT. OH, CONGRATULATIONS, MIKE!

AND THIS BATHROOM WAS DESIGNED

AND THIS COULD BE THE TIME.

AND THIS IS A REAL EMERGENCY.

AND THIS IS MY FIRST SWING AT MEXICAN COOKING.

AND THIS TIME I'M GONNA BEAT YOUR EXAM SCORE.

AND THIS TIME WE GOT PROOF ON FILM!

AND THURSDAY'S TOMATOES.

AND TOLD YOU TO PRACTICE AT HOME?

AND TOMMY.

AND TOMORROW IT'S LIABLE TO BE CARS OR EVEN WORSE.

AND TRY TO GET A TEMPORARY REPLACEMENT.

AND TRY TO THINK OF SOMETHING.

AND TRYING TO PAY HER BILLS.

AND WALKS AROUND THE PARK GREETING PEOPLE.

AND WE CAME RIGHT OVER HERE TO TALK THIS OVER WITH YOU.

AND WE CAME UP WITH AN ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIC IDEA.

AND WE DECIDED WHAT YOU REALLY NEED IS A WEEK OFF.

AND WE DIDN'T KNOW WHERE TO GO.

AND WE HAVE 3 BEDROOMS UP HERE AND 1 UPSTAIRS.

AND WE LIKE TO KEEP OUR HOME NEAT.

AND WE NEED 6 BIG ONES TO WIN.

AND WE ORDERED THE BOOKS ALREADY.

AND WE THINK YOU SHOULD KNOW SOMETHING.

AND WE THOUGHT TONIGHT WAS A PERFECT OPPORTUNITY.

AND WE WANT TO GROW UP WITH CHILDREN.

AND WE WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT IT.

AND WE WON'T KNOW TILL WE OPEN 'EM UP.

AND WE WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN MAD.

AND WE'LL TRY TO FIGURE SOMETHING OUT.

AND WE'LL TURN THE PARK UPSIDE DOWN.

AND WE'RE ALL VERY HAPPY ABOUT IT.

AND WE'RE ALSO GONNA START THE VERY FIRST JOHNNY BRAVO FAN CLUB.

AND WE'RE HERE TO DISCUSS THE CURRENT RASH OF U.F.O. SIGHTINGS.

AND WE'RE REALLY SORRY ABOUT HOW WE ACTED, TOO, GREG.

AND WE'RE STILL 75 YARDS FROM PAY DIRT.

AND WE'VE BEEN PRACTICALLY ALL OVER THE PARK.

AND WENDY, AND PAUL, AND MARGARET,

AND WHAT ABOUT REVEREND MELBOURNE AT SAM'S BUTCHER SHOP?

AND WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU TODAY, REVEREND?

AND WHAT WE DO, HE DOES, AND WHERE WE GO, HE GOES.

AND WHAT YOU PICK IS WHAT YOU GET.

AND WHAT'S BUGGING YOU?

AND WHAT'S WRONG WITH GREG GOING TO MY OLD ALMA MATER?

AND WHEN WESTDALE FINDS OUT MY SISTER'S A DOUBLE AGENT,

AND WHEN YOU'RE NOT, YOU'RE NOT.

AND WHERE ARE YOU?

AND WHERE'S THE MAIL?

AND WHOEVER FINDS IT FIRST,

AND WHOEVER HITS THE LEAST WINS, RIGHT?

AND WHY DO YOU NEED CONCENTRATION

AND WITH TANK COMING OVER, I THOUGHT...

AND WRITE ON WALLS,

AND YOU ADOPTED 3 GIRLS.

AND YOU ARE SERVING THE DINNER.

AND YOU CAN'T REMEMBER TO TAKE THE TRASH OUT ON THURSDAYS.

AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE WORRIED ABOUT BEING PAID BACK.

AND YOU GAVE NOTHING IN RETURN.

AND YOU GO ON UPSTAIRS AND GET INTO BED.

AND YOU HAVE MY PERSONAL GUARANTEE

AND YOU JUST LOST A HUSBAND. HOW COME?

AND YOU KNOW WHAT PLAY I CALL?

AND YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR ANSWER HAD BETTER BE.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

AND YOU LOOK LIKE ME WITHOUT GLASSES.

AND YOU OWE ME $1,500 BESIDES.

AND YOU REMEMBER MR. MATHEWS.

AND YOU SEE, SHE'S RETIRING, AND EVERYBODY LOVES HER SO MUCH

AND YOU SMOOTH IT OUT.

AND YOU TAKE IT EASY TILL WE GET BACK.

AND YOU UNDERSTAND HIM.

AND YOU WANT TO BE GOOD AT IT,

AND YOU WERE STUPID ENOUGH TO SAY YOU KNOW JOE NAMATH?

AND YOU WOULDN'T HAVE QUIT IN ONLY A WEEK,

AND YOU'D ACTUALLY HELP HER INSTEAD OF ME?

AND YOU'D BE AMAZED HOW MANY OF THEM STAGGER INTO THE STATION

AND YOU'LL BE GOING TO WESTDALE.

AND YOU'LL BE MR. COOL OF WESTDALE HIGH.

AND YOU'LL LOOK CUTE IN AN APRON. I'LL BEAT YOU EASY.

AND YOU'LL NEVER FIND WHERE YOURS LIES

AND YOU'RE A CAPITAL "G" GOOF OFF!

AND YOU'RE ALL MY WITNESSES,

AND YOU'RE AS PRETTY AS EVER.

AND YOU'RE AWARE THAT I ALWAYS DO BUSINESS

AND YOUR SISTER ARE EXCELLENT DRIVERS. RIGHT.

AND, AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED,

AND, AS FOR A COUPLE OF OTHER THINGS,

AND, BOY, DID I EVER LOSE FACE.

AND, UH,

AND, UH, ELECTRIC MIXERS ARE IN.

AND, UH, THE WALLS WERE SO THIN,

AND, UH, UH, THE CABALLERO'S NAME IS FELIPE PACKER.

AND, UH, WHO MIGHT YOU BE?

AND, WELL, WE FIGURED SOMEBODY WOULD FIND OUT.

AND, YOU KNOW, BEING A DRUM MAJORETTE

AND?

AND?

AND?

AND... AND I WAS TELLING HER ABOUT HOW LONESOME MATT WAS,

AND... NO.

AND... THE LINEBACKER.

ANOTHER BLIND ALLEY.

ANOTHER BROTHER?

ANOTHER ONE LIKE...

ANY CAL!

ANY CHANCE OF GETTING AN ADVANCE ON OUR FUTURE ALLOWANCES?

ANY GOOD WEDDINGS LATELY, REVEREND?

ANY IDEA WHAT IT WAS?

ANY LUCK?

ANY MORE EMBARRASSED THAN I ALREADY AM.

ANY PORT IN A STORM, SAM.

ANY PUFFINESS AROUND HIS CHEEKS?

ANY SECRETS?

ANY SPECIAL REASON, ALICE?

ANY TIME. NAME IT.

ANYBODY CAN SINK A BALL ON THE BREAK.

ANYBODY EVER TELL YOU YOUR MOMMY DRESSES YOU FUNNY?

ANYBODY FOR ANY CAL?

ANYBODY FOR HOT CHOCOLATE?

ANYBODY FOR MORE FLAPJACKS? HOT OFF THE GRIDDLE AND STILL FLAPPING?

ANYBODY WHO NEEDS THAT MUCH BANDAGING ISN'T WORTH SAVING.

ANYBODY! LET ME OUT!

ANYONE THAT GOES TO FAIRVIEW'S A FREAK,

ANYONE WHO KNOCKS THE EGG OFF THE PYLON IS A LOSER.

ANYTHING SPECIAL IN THOSE PLANS?

ANYTHING SPECIAL YOU WANT ME TO ADD TO THE SHOPPING LIST?

ANYTHING WRONG?

ANYTHING WRONG?

ANYTHING, PETER, JUST NAME IT.

ANYTIME.

ANYTIME. ANYTIME, EXCEPT NOW. I'M BUSY.

ANYTIME. OK.

ANYWAY, I AM TRYING TO PROVE A POINT.

ANYWAY, I REALLY LIKE IT HERE.

ANYWAY, I'VE... I'VE MADE UP MY MIND.

ANYWAY, SAM'S NOT THE BEST FISH IN THE OCEAN.

ANYWAY, THE PLAY'S ABOUT AN AMERICAN GIRL IN PARIS

APPLES ARE FOOD.

ARE ALL EARTH PEOPLE YOUR SIZE?

ARE ALL KAPLUTIANS YOUR SIZE?

ARE APT TO BE DESTRUCTIVE,

ARE GONNA BE EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT.

ARE NEVER LONESOME IS

ARE THERE ANY SPECIAL REQUIREMENTS?

ARE WE GONNA BE ACTORS?

ARE YOU CHICKEN, GREGORY?

ARE YOU CONCERNED THAT... THAT SOME MEMBER OF THIS HOUSEHOLD

ARE YOU FRIEND OR ENEMY?

ARE YOU GETTING FRESH WITH ME, FELLA?

ARE YOU GOING TO BE IN THERE ALL NIGHT?

ARE YOU GONNA STAY IN THERE ALL NIGHT?

ARE YOU HINTING, ALICE?

ARE YOU KIDDIN'? I COULD BEAT THOSE BUMS

ARE YOU KIDDIN'? I COULDN'T SELL A BAG OF PEANUTS

ARE YOU KIDDIN'? THAT STUPID GAME COST ME $100.

ARE YOU KIDDING? JAN BRADY'S THE MOST POPULAR GIRL IN HER CLASS.

ARE YOU KIDDING? ME, SWIPE YOUR PLAYBOOK?

ARE YOU KIDDING? WHO CAN SLEEP WITH THAT BUZZ SAW GOING?

ARE YOU KIDDING? YOU'RE A GOOD SWIMMER.

ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A BROKEN ARM? WE WANNA WATCH T.V.

ARE YOU OK?

ARE YOU PLANNING TO EAT ALL THAT

ARE YOU PLANNING TO SERVE SOUP?

ARE YOU REALLY AN F.B.I. AGENT?

ARE YOU SAYING...

ARE YOU SURE THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO DO, SWEETHEART?

ARE YOU SURE YOU BOYS DIDN'T HAVE A FIGHT WITH BOBBY?

ARE YOU SURE YOU CAN KEEP A SECRET?

ARE YOU SURE YOU HAVEN'T BEEN PRACTICING ON THE SIDE?

ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO USE THE WORD "RECORD"?

ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE FEELING ALL RIGHT?

ARE YOU SURE, JAN?

ARE YOU SURE?

ARE YOU SURE?

ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT OLIVER?

ARE YOU TWO VOLUNTEERING TO HELP?

ARE YOU WORKING WITH THE F.B.I., UNCLE MIKE?

ARE... ARE YOU HURT?

AREN'T WE ALL?

AREN'T YOU GOING TO FINISH WIPING THE REST OF THE COUNTER?

AREN'T YOU GONNA PUT SOME OF THAT ON? YEAH. LATER.

AREN'T YOU THE YOUNG GIRL FROM THE FOOTBALL BOOTH?

AREN'T YOU TWO GOING TO STICK AROUND,

AREN'T YOU UNDER THAT IMPRESSION?

AROUND HERE? OH, YOU MEAN WITH SAM.

ARTHUR LIKES TO DANCE AND HE'S GOT 2 GOOD KNEES.

ARTHUR OWENS.

AS A DOCTOR, I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT WILL DO NO GOOD.

AS A MATTER OF FACT I DON'T KNOW WHAT SAM DID IN THE ARMY.

AS A MATTER OF FACT, WE DIDN'T.

AS A YEAR'S SUPPLY OF CHALK FOR THEIR FINGERS.

AS AN ELEPHANT IS IN ICE SKATES.

AS BADLY AS YOU WANTED TO.

AS I SAID, JUST LIKE OUR HONEYMOON.

AS IN NANNY.

AS IT TURNS OUT, CHALK WAS SECOND ON MY LIST.

AS LONG AS I GET TO PLAY DOPEY.

AS LONG AS I'M LETTING YOU LOOK,

AS MUCH AS WE LIKE IT AND APPRECIATE THE GIFT,

AS SOON AS I TAKE CARE OF MY THUMB.

AS YOU WESTDALE GUYS, RIGHT?

ASK FOR... ASK FOR AN OUTSIDE ROOM.

ASK HER HOW I DID WITH LINDA.

ASK MARCIA. SHE'S GOT THE KEYS.

ASK YOUR MOTHER. I GOTTA GO TO WORK.

ASKING SAM IF HE'S GOTTEN THE PLANS AWAY FROM DAD YET.

ASPARAGUS HOLLANDAISE... OH.

AT COMPANY EXPENSE. HOW ABOUT THAT?

AT LEAST 20.

AT LEAST NO PLACE IT'D BE SAFE.

AT LEAST.

AT MY AGE, IT'S NOTHING.

AT NIGHT?

AT THAT BANQUET IN MR. PHILLIPS' HONOR, YEAH?

AT THE RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME.

AT THE RISK OF HIS OWN LIFE.

AT THE RISK OF SOUNDING LIKE A PARENT,

AT THE SAME TIME.

AT THIS HOUR?

AT WHOSE HOUSE I ALWAYS HAVE DINNER,

AT YOUR AGE, THAT'S A LONG TIME.

ATTAGIRL.

AW, BE PATIENT WITH HER, KIDS.

AW, COME ON, ALICE.

AW, COME ON.

AW, DOES THAT FEEL GOOD?

AW, NOT AT ALL. OH, SAM,

AW, NOT EVERYTHING, I HOPE.