The Ranch - Season 1 Edit

A flag cannot ripple in the vacuum of space.

A horse walks into a bar, right?

A lot of strippers in Denver would get new boobies.

Abby came last night and it really screwed me up, so...

Abby, don't tell Colt about you and I...

Abby. Hey.

About six years?

About the time I'll be getting a beer.

Activities: marching band, jazz band...

After now.

After the party?

After you left, that wasn't much of an option.

Ah, it ain't breathing.

Ah, there it is. There's always an excuse.

All I want is what I earn. All anybody is gonna do for me is dig...

All right, but you got this one wrong, Ma.

All right, Carla.

All right, Colt. Get over here and wash your arm.

All right, don't tell Dad.

All right, full disclosure.

All right, give this to your brother.

All right, I think I got everything.

All right, listen to this.

All right, one loop for each foot.

All right, this is getting good.

All right, what am I? Like, a wolf or... a lion?

All right, yeah, a couple of people react.

All right! All right!

All right.

All right. Cool story, bro.

All right. Well, I'm gonna go outside and help Dad with Carla.

All right. You know what?

All the way out here, in the middle of the night,

All you're doing right now is slowing us down.

Also, any tool that says Pedro is mine.

And by that, I mean every player has to sell at least ten tickets per home game.

And by the way, the bottom of the totem pole is the most important part,

And don't touch any of the waitresses.

And every time we fight, we end up f...

And I almost got a hole all the way through the back of his head.

And I just need a place to stay for a couple days.

And I know that, too.

And I see this sweet ice sculpture of Wayne Gretzky.

And I slept with his daughter on day four. But...

And I'd rather not see you cripple yourself.

And it's filled with a bunch of drunk guys I can take advantage of if I want to.

And management.

And naturally, I think, I could take a wizz on him.

And no good would ever come of it.

And no one else in the bar is reacting to the fact that a horse walked in?

And occasionally NFL scouts do come to these games.

And said, Trick or treat, and Dad said, Smith or Wesson.

And second...

And since we're going to be seeing a lot of each other,

And so, I just assumed he was gonna close it.

And so, I'm a little drunk, and I...

And that he's, you know, always been kind of a jackass.

And then I think he felt nauseous and went outside to get some air.

And then you drove Mom out of here!

And they put the ice in the pisser.

And try and see what was...

And yesterday you said good job.

And you just gotta keep proving yourself.

And your pants?

And... did you just call yourself a beaver?

Another good one.

Any of them kids yours?

Any tool that says Beau on it is off limits.

Anyway, I don't know what my next step's gonna be but...

Are you dying?

Are you kiddin' me?

Are you kidding? I got paid more than that for playing in college.

Are you serious?

Are you still chasing this dream?

Aren't you Colt Bennett?

As soon as I make the team, I'm out of here.

Aw, he must still like me.

Aw!

Awkward? Come on, I never even gave it another thought.

Bam! I slide balls first into Miss Shania Twain.

Based on your tone, something that pisses you off.

Because he's not good at it.

Because, you know, your dad can be unfair.

Begins with hard work on the ranch.

Being a part of the Marriott family is awesome.

Besides, what do you care?

Better question would be why I allow you and Rooster in the house.

Billy Ray Cyrus.

Blue skies. God, I never thought I'd hate blue skies.

Booked us a room for our anniversary.

Boom!

But her other four are real cool. We mostly play Xbox.

But I ain't gonna be his servant.

But I'm not gonna be your servant.

But in case you guys run out of things to fight about...

But it is rock fucking solid.

But it's also management.

But we do get a lot of business with skiers and other winter sport enthusiasts.

But when you're here, it's just two brothers bonding.

But you can ask 'em to stick their arm up a cow's address.

But you have a part in this, too.

But you weren't willing to work for it.

But, like, a badass rooster.

But...

Can I just finish my joke?

Can we get a couple of cold ones, please?

Can we just get those beers?

Can't put the face on the pancake.

Can't wait!

Carry the one. And that would make you 24?

Check it out.

Cheers, Maggie.

Chess club.

Colt Bennett!

Colt would sell all the livestock, sell the ranch, piss the money away,

Colt, don't you remember? He went to Garrison with us.

Colt, let me explain something to you, all right?

Colt?

Colt.

Colt...

Colt's home.

Colt's jeans cost 85 bucks.

Come here, buddy.

Come on, man, that was her nickname in 10th grade.

Come on, we got that 20 pair to move to the south pasture.

Come on.

Come on. Let's grab a table.

Conceited? Stubborn? Full blown alcoholic?

Congratulations, Pop. You win.

Couldn't have just told Dad you wanted to stay?

Crazy seeing you.

Cut the crap. This isn't a press conference.

Dad called and said he needed some help at home,

Dad needed someone here to help him run the ranch.

Dad was gonna put a blanket on you,

Dad will lose the ranch, but we can always come back here and visit

Dad, I'm here, okay?

Dad, I'm just trying to help.

Dad, this is Heather

Dad's up on top.

Damn, Colt. I'm sorry.

Damn, this is the last thing I need.

Did I ever tell you about the first date I ever had with your father?

Did she look down and say, That don't impress me much?

Do I look like some kind of charity case?

Dodging the deep questions, a long standing Bennett tradition.

Don't go making accusations when you don't know the whole story.

Don't touch that ham bone. It's for the dog.

Don't you Hi, Mama me. Give me a hug.

Done.

Dude!

Duh.

Especially now since you cut your hair and shaved off that stupid goatee.

Even prison's fun when you're just visitin'.

Every opportunity you've had...

Every time I see your father, we fight.

Everything's getting a drink...

Ew! Forgot how warm it is.

Extra 15 bucks if you come early and line the field.

Feet will be right at the end of those.

Figure all the money you gave me over the years,

Figure if I give it 110%...

Fine. You know what? That's...

First of all...

First practice, Wednesday at 11:00.

First time you made the front page since the state finals.

Focus on what? The fact that Dad is impossible?

For flashing Shania Twain while you were up there.

For future reference, the rooster likes provolone.

Former high school phenom Colt Bennett shows Shania his Twain.

French club...

Friendly fire there, Eagle.

Funny.

Gathering the wood and the crap that the rooster and the eagle need

Get me some coffee.

Get off of me!

Get your mind out of the gutter, woman.

Give me a break, you know?

Give me a whiskey the size you'd need if you were still living with Dad.

Global warming's a bunch of crap Al Gore made up

Go outside, look him straight in the eye, and say...

Go to hell!

God, do I look like an idiot?

God, wait, why can't you hook her up and I'll just pull the rope?

God, you are such a stubborn old son of a bitch!

Good job.

Good seeing you.

Good to see you, Colt.

Got it.

Great here? What is great about this?

Guess they couldn't fit virgin club.

Guess you were right. I'm done with football.

Hank, I'll give you five bucks for that beer

He died wearing lady boots.

He is nothing like me.

He kept telling the coach I was drunk at practice.

He shoots, he scores.

He was up in the loft with Rooster. I was scooping shit with Pedro's shovel.

He's a stubborn, temperamental asshole!

He's an eagle, you know, soaring above us all.

He's been out there for hours already. He hardly ever sleeps.

He's in free fall now 'cause of the ranch. He's in crisis mode.

He's rare, but when you catch a glimpse, it's magical.

Heck yeah, you guys used to play Eye of the Tiger

Hell, I left the gate open, even the cows tried to get away from you!

Hell, I'll get the epinephrine.

Hell. The barn's on fire.

Hello to you, my sweet Margaret.

Here lies Colt Bennett.

Here we go, girl. You're gonna be fine.

Here you go.

Here.

Here's the only thing I trust you with.

Hey, after dinner, you wanna watch something?

Hey, Alicia came on to me.

Hey, bartender...

Hey, buddy. I'll sign something for you in a second.

Hey, by the way, how'd your toothbrush taste this morning?

Hey, Colt. Rooster.

Hey, Dad, uh, I was thinking, since we're re doing the barn roof,

Hey, I got ten bucks anyone in here knows how old I am.

Hey, I know it's late. I was just wondering if we could talk for a second?

Hey, I'm gonna hit the head.

Hey, if you feel a Timex up in there, grab it for me, huh?

Hey, look, that ain't my fault. He cut off his mullet.

Hey, look, that ain't my fault. He cut off his mullet.

Hey, nice to meet you, bud.

Hey, so how long's Abby and Kenny been going out?

Hey, sweetheart.

Hey, uh, why'd you come all the way out here?

Hey, we working on the barn again tomorrow?

Hey, would you do me a favor?

Hey!

Hey.

Hey.

Hey. A horse walks into a bar.

Hi, Mama.

Hi, Mr. Bennett.

His power was in his mullet.

Holy cow!

Horses don't drink alcohol.

How about a pancake with a whipped cream face?

How about I make you that pre game pasta you used to like?

How do you even get a job like that?

How long ago was that, Rooster?

How old were you in that picture?

How we wish we had a few more projects around here.

How'd you even hear about that?

How's he doing, by the way?

How's Mom doing?

How's the shoulder?

Huh! You're just like him.

Huh. Well, let me check in the back.

I can if it means you got a spot for me.

I can still make it. I just need a chance.

I can't believe I'm here, either.

I can't believe I'm in Colt Bennett's bedroom.

I can't believe it!

I can't make eye contact with her for a while.

I can't stay here with him, he's impossible.

I can't stay here, he's impossible.

I can't stay in this school, the coach won't let me start.

I can't stay with this girl. She doesn't like it when I cheat on her.

I could set you up so you could pay those bills online.

I did not know where this analogy was going when I first started,

I didn't even know it was a date until he said...

I didn't start this. You did.

I do.

I don't know, it's just weird, you know, seeing her with another guy.

I don't know. Something on Netflix?

I don't know. What do you care for?

I don't remember three concussions.

I don't see why I gotta do all the grunt work.

I don't think washing helped at all.

I don't want to lose you again.

I don't want to lose you again.

I felt like I wanted to tell you in person that...

I found one of 'em standing in the Sizzler parking lot

I gave it CPR and I brought it back to life.

I got a lot of things to do around here,

I got a tryout...

I got it.

I got my health, the bar keeps me pretty busy

I heard a good joke today. So...

I knew you were gonna pull this crap. You always do.

I know Heather. How's your mom?

I know I don't like taking crap from Dad. That don't make me happy.

I know you got a busy day. I made you breakfast sandwiches.

I know you made that team.

I know, I'm sorry I'm late.

I love you, big fella.

I love you, Daddy.

I mean I didn't make it.

I mean, he's got it out for me. That's what it is.

I mean, last year we went to Omaha.

I mean, obviously, I would run it.

I mean, that'll kill him.

I mean, you coulda just stalked him on Facebook,

I mean... he even had to let Pedro go.

I need somebody up here that knows what they're doing.

I passed out on his porch one night,

I promise when I run into you guys in the future,

I put a condom on a banana.

I put it on the fridge.

I remember last time you stopped by.

I remember this.

I said, If I want to, Hank.

I started out as a bellhop, and I just worked my way up.

I stole them from my boy Pedro.

I think his exact words were...

I think I stopped calling it detention and started calling it homeroom.

I think the last time he told me good job

I thought you were dating Linda.

I thought you were gonna take a look at that tractor

I thought you were up in Canada playing amateur's football.

I thought, if it's all right with you, I could stick around here for a while.

I wanted to make sure you were okay.

I was gonna come over and draw a dick on your forehead

I was just kidding like you did with the banana thing.

I was playing football, at the top of my game, and then...

I was proud of you.

I was six.

I was talking to my son.

I will treat Kenny with hospitality.

I... They got this hotel up there made entirely of ice, okay?

I'd be happy having you around here

I'll be damned.

I'll give her CPR.

I'm 35.

I'm a football player.

I'm about to have sex with a national championship quarterback.

I'm allowed to say things. I'm a person.

I'm aware of that, Jameson.

I'm gonna go back out and check on him, make sure that calf is sucking.

I'm gonna go get you that coffee.

I'm gonna go hang out with Heather.

I'm gonna grab a beer.

I'm just catching up with an old friend here.

I'm just gonna remove this here potential murder weapon up out of the way.

I'm just trying to prepare him for the rest of his life.

I'm leaving.

I'm messing with you. It is sex ed.

I'm out of here then.

I'm ready to work. Just tell me what to do.

I'm sure I can get us a great rate at a Marriott in Omaha.

I'm sure you could.

I'm talking about high school, college, and the pros...

I'm the first one up in the morning, and I'm on the label of hot sauce bottles.

I'm... I'm sure your dad is being unfair, all right?

I've been layin' awake all night

If I rode you, it was 'cause you were the only one in this family

If it doesn't make you look like an ass, it's none of his business.

If it helps, we weren't facing each other.

If it's closing time, young whiskey and old blondes.

If it's so bad here, why don't you just leave?

If that means I have to push him, so be it.

If they don't have it, we'll go someplace else.

If we win, you get another 50.

If you didn't just make that team,

If you don't want to do the things I ask you to do...

If you leave now, Dad is not letting you back in here.

In these parts, you're still a big deal.

Including me.

Is that your national championship ring?

Is that, like, a Game of Thrones thing?

Isn't this fantastic?

It really is good seeing you again.

It was Colt. Yeah, Colt was talking.

It was in the paper.

It was incredible. That calf was born still.

It was on the ranch.

It was worse than that.

It's a horse. He'd drink outside in a trough.

It's a long shot...

It's a totem pole thing.

It's actually the absence of all...

It's all right, Colt. I wasn't counting on you anyway.

It's beaver hunting season.

It's different with me and him.

It's extra water for the cattle and irrigation.

It's hard to raise grass fed cattle when there's no grass.

It's just Dad. I mean, you know, he gets pissed at everything.

It's like my birthday all over again.

It's like the Miami Heat, except...

It's like when you go to the fancy restaurant

It's nice to see you, Abby. You too, Kenny.

It's none of your business.

It's not my fault. It's that other bastard.

It's okay. We didn't really hang in the same circles.

It's rainin'.

It's ten o'clock.

It's the least I could do.

It's the new Spanish teacher. So hot.

Jesus, finally.

Just because.

Just get the calf out of there so we can raise it and slaughter it.

Just like old times.

Just staring at a poster of a rib eye.

Just swallow your pride and take the damn money!

Just swimming around,

Just to see if I was okay.

Kenny and I are in love.

Kenny is on his way to a mini fridge expo in Boulder.

Kenny! Yeah!

Kenny's pretty cool, actually.

Kinda? You up to speed on everything here?

Lady next to you puts her boobies up against the glass.

Last time I saw that truck...

Last time, you lost your watch in there.

Let me ask you something.

Let's do this.

Let's go over and talk by the truck.

Let's go. Heather...

Let's not get caught up in all that kind of stuff.

Let's see you make little Roosters now.

Light beer. It's the closest I could get to water.

Like I did your last girlfriend, Jenny Roberts.

Like what?

Listen, son... I'm not too old to kick your ass.

Look, Colt, I'm sorry if I made tonight awkward.

Look, Dad, I'm really sorry.

Look, for what it's worth...

Look, I know it's not the big time, but the quality of play is pretty decent.

Look, man, you're my little brother, okay?

Looks like a blue Ranger, rally lights... Oh, I think that's Abby's truck.

Looks like Marcia Brady wears 'em.

Ma, I got a tryout tomorrow. Make it a whiskey.

Made you coffee.

Man, come on, not today.

Man, I'm glad you're back.

Man, it is good to have you back.

Man, my Uggs.

Man... things were just getting great here.

Marriott's got 4,200 locations worldwide.

Maybe for you. Nerd.

Maybe it's none of my business, but weren't you a little hard on Colt?

Me and her were in the back of it making little Roosters.

Me? Come on. I'm great! Yeah.

Mom?

Most folks think you need a degree, but, really, it's all about people skills.

Must've been a very short man.

My big thing was band.

My work is done.

Nah, I'm just kidding.

Need some Tabasco, tomato juice, a stalk of celery and vodka.

Never mind.

Next time I get up, we're going to work.

Next time it'll be different.

No

No punches till I get back.

No, actually, this is my boyfriend, Kenny.

No, Amazon will have it here in 24 hours.

No, I don't.

No, I'm gonna go to the gun rack in the truck...

No, it wasn't!

No, my point is that every relationship with your father

No, no, no.

No, no, we are real careful. We only have sex when she's pregnant.

No, she's not pregnant right now.

No, thanks.

No, that does not help at all!

No, you don't understand.

No!

No.

No.

No. I started this? I started this?

No. Keeping this place is killin' him.

No. She said, That makes me feel like a woman.

No. We'll go over to Henderson's to get one.

Not a chance, Beau.

Not even for your favorite son?

Not gonna happen.

Nothing else, you'll sell tickets.

Nothing three Vicodin and a couple of shots of whiskey can't take care of, huh?

Now my back is killing me. I don't know who this Pedro guy was...

Now the horse can talk?

Now, below him is me, the rooster.

Now, the three of us are like a totem pole.

Of course I'm good at it.

Oh

Oh, '99...

Oh, actually, those are my Uggs.

Oh, band! Yeah, cool!

Oh, Carla had a breech birth last night. So I had to stick my arm up her...

Oh, come on. I'm just trying to help.

Oh, damn it.

Oh, damn, Carla.

Oh, early. Tryout's at 2:00.

Oh, God.

Oh, good. I was wondering what's wrong with us.

Oh, he's good. Told me to tell you to shut the hell up.

Oh, hey, Colt.

Oh, hey, hang on.

Oh, I did. I came in there and turned it off for you.

Oh, I don't know. Like me?

Oh, I slept fine, thanks. How about you?

Oh, if it helps, we weren't facing each other.

Oh, man, am I full. I should not have eaten that second steak.

Oh, man. Whoa!

Oh, my God!

Oh, no. That was a playoff beard.

Oh, no. You do it.

Oh, really?

Oh, so there's absolutely no way that I'm right?

Oh, sorry, your dad's asleep?

Oh, sure, you know how old he is.

Oh, thanks.

Oh, that's Dad's hammer.

Oh, that's right,

Oh, uh, sweetie, before I forget, I, uh...

Oh, uh, the games aren't on Sunday.

Oh, uh... okay. Are you sure?

Oh, well, you should try warm milk.

Oh, yeah, good, just the two of us.

Oh, yeah, I also brought a couple guns.

Oh, yeah, that's a... that's a great idea.

Oh, yes, please.

Oh, you got it? Well then start pulling!

Oh.

Oh. Yeah. Boyfriend. Nice.

Oh... I don't know.

Oh... nice. Ham and Swiss.

Oh... wait. He's not gonna lose this place, is he?

Okay.

Okay. I was gonna say selfish but...

Old whiskey and young blondes.

Once you're on that team, I'll make the drive every Sunday.

One more thing.

One of the cow's water just broke and she's calling your name.

One time, Fourth of July, both drunk, back of the truck, boots on, sex.

Only reason this whole thing blew up?

Or am I?

Or tea.

Or the gun rack next to the fridge, or the gun rack in the bathroom,

Or the second gun rack in the bathroom.

Our cows were all over town.

Perfect.

Phew! I just had me one of them pees that's better than sex.

Playing chess and talking French?

Plus, I got to hear Dad make fun of your nap for dessert. So...

Plus, when I sit on the porch and drink alone, I'm an alcoholic,

Pregnant Linda!

Pushed him right out the door.

Put your clothes on, I need a hand.

Really?

Remember how he reacted when Obama got elected?

Remember last night,

Right, you have four of those, you won't care how your arm smells.

Right, you're dead certain you're right and won't listen to reason.

Right?

Right.

Right.

Rooster was chasing after me yelling, That's my truck!

Rooster, go grab a pen and draw that dick on your brother's head.

Rooster, we are the proud parents of a beautiful 85 pound boy.

Rooster, you home?

Said you were done with football.

Same old Colt,

Screw you, Al Gore!

Screw you.

See if that storm knocked any limbs down.

See ya later, Beave.

See you at lunch.

See? That's what's wrong with your generation.

Seriously? I can't even shut a truck door right?

Sex ed?

She saved a horse and rode a cowboy.

She's 22!

She's a fine woman.

She's good. She says, Hey.

She's, like, 50, but looks at least diez años younger.

Shoot, you know what? I just realized I got my old man's truck,

Shut up.

Sit and talk for a while.

So all I want to hear from now on is silence.

So half the population of China can pay their bills with it, too?

So how about you? What are you up to?

So I gotta get it back before it gets too late.

So I, uh, decided it was time to be MVP of life and not just football.

So if you want to start in the middle of the night, keep making noise.

So just to be clear,

So that'd make you born in '93

So we agree.

So you felt like you were stuck?

So, come on.

So, here we are!

So, I'm taking a piss in The Great One's mouth.

So, is it true? You in trouble?

So, uh, 17?

So, what, do you guys just hang out together,

So, what're you saying? Dad's always been a jackass?

So...

So...

So... so, maybe I'm the good luck charm this family needs.

Soap and water won't do it.

Sold my championship ring.

Some things never change.

Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Sorry...

Spoiled? Selfish? Irresponsible? Kind of a wuss?

Standing at a bar with a bottle of whiskey in your hand.

Standing right here, Dad.

Still full of shit, huh?

Strap on those Uggs and try out for cheerleader.

Stupid question.

Sunday's reserved for the high school girls' lacrosse team.

Sweetheart is always in reference to him?

Talking, having fun.

Tell her to shut the hell up, too.

Tell your mom Beau says Hey back.

Thank you, I know what I'm doing.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thanks

Thanks, Mom, I'm not a kid anymore.

Thanks.

Thanks.

That ain't God, Dad, that's global warming.

That had any smarts or talent.

That is absolutely not true.

That kid's in juvie now

That the rain did not arrive until I did.

That was awesome!

That was awesome.

That would imply that I slept.

That you might not be right about everything?

That's a bloody Mary.

That's a great idea.

That's a great question, Colt. I, um...

That's a stupid haircut.

That's Australian for boots.

That's cute.

That's enough.

That's like the Battle of Hastings without the death of King Edward.

That's none of your damn business.

That's not gonna work.

That's not the answer I was expecting.

That's not the point. The mascot's job is to support the team.

That's the attitude.

That's why the owner lives in her own Airstream now.

That's your three concussions talking.

That's, like, four beans and a ham bone

That's... No more awkwardness.

The Bennetts.

The guy you called the next Johnny Cash.

The horse walks up to the bartender and says,

The key word in hospitality management is hospitality.

The Marriott?

The meat's gone?

The meat's gone.

The owner's kind of a pain in my ass.

The two by fours, four by fours, two by sixes...

Then I don't need you on this ranch.

Then stay!

Then yes, I am.

Then you snuck out of here in the middle of the night.

There hasn't been a decent rain around here in over a year.

There he is. Kenneth Ballard.

There is no way you'd be this calm right now.

There we go. There we go.

There's a baked potato and half a scoop of beans there.

They ought to put that on your tombstone.

They'd never know how fucked up we really were.

They're boots.

They're both cute.

They're ladies' shoes.

They're real surprised, but then they get over it.

They're Uggs.

Things have been going good.

Think you can make it through a whole season?

Thinking of this money pit we call a ranch.

Third period! It's... Biology?

This is the worst year that anybody can remember.

This one does.

This one for eatin', whistlin' and shakin' hands.

This one... is for pregnant cows and constipated horses.

This place isn't yours to save.

This time it's a girl. What's it gonna be next time?

This was a bad idea.

Those are not boots.

To build the dam to keep the water out.

To encourage me instead of riding me all the time?

To get a drink.

To see what this guy looked like.

To sell books to Californians.

Tom Brady wears 'em.

Took your brother's truck.

Top notch bowler.

Two hundred and fifty a game. You start, it's a bonus of 50.

Uh, 34 is still young to be a quarterback.

Uh, actually... I got another idea.

Uh, Dad, we could use that money.

Uh, I can, uh, get you the family discount, Cousin Colt.

Uh, I got to be honest, that is...

Uh, look, I don't mind mucking stalls or carrying wood or riding fence,

Uh, no I didn't.

Uh, semi pro. Yeah, I was playing for the Saskatoon Cold.

Uh, that was high school.

Uh, the backup to the backup quarterback.

Um...

Unless I don't like the guy, and then I use this one.

Unless you got any more ideas, I got bills to pay.

Unless, of course, you want to?

Wait, he yelled at me?

Wait, is that Cute Linda or Pregnant Linda?

Wait. Backup? But you were the best ever.

Wait. So, it's just him and Rooster?

Wait. You just said something nice to him.

Waking a grown man from his nap isn't one of them.

Wanna do a little more bonding?

Want me to go inside and get your belt?

Was when I learned how to walk.

Wasting my time.

Water?

We all sacrificed so you had a chance to succeed.

We also heard you got arrested

We can have Colt ride the fence on the north side,

We could run a drain pipe down to a cistern, catch the run off.

We dated all through high school. That was, like, four years.

We eat dinner at 6:00.

We got a lot of work to do.

We gotta keep it down unless you wanna clean up stalls tonight.

We had our first date in this truck.

We had our first date in this truck.

We were all supposed to go to dinner but you guys just fought the whole time.

We worked all day, had dinner, promptly at 6:00.

We'll get the paper and the shingles on in the morning.

We've got a country full of people with their hand out.

Well, guess what, he's tough on me, too.

Well, I could have, but this way I got two steaks for dinner.

Well, I know what I'm doing!

Well, I still love you, sweetheart.

Well, I was gonna say the first drive in movie.

Well, I'm teaching history over at Garrison.

Well, it ain't gonna be here 'cause you're about to lose this place

Well, it worked. He's up.

Well, it's a start.

Well, it's also possible you're not peeing right.

Well, it's not like I went and dug my yearbook up

Well, Kenny is the manager of the Courtyard by Marriott in Telluride.

Well, next time it'll be different.

Well, no one said working with him was gonna be easy.

Well, obviously not.

Well, speaking of women who don't like being cheated on,

Well, that mouthy penguin had it coming.

Well, that's good, right? It means you still care.

Well, that's not true.

Well, then come with me

Well, there he is. We thought you were out for the night.

Well, this horse wanted something stronger.

Well, to the Bennetts.

Well, Tom Brady wears 'em.

Well, uh, technically, we're outside of Telluride,

Well, what do you want me to say?

Well, why are you here now?

Well, you know, you've gotta understand that Dad's...

Well, you must think I'm...

Well, you pushed him all right.

Well, you're shoulder deep in a cow and ankle deep in her shit, so...

Well, you're wrong about me.

Were you?

Wha..

What about you, Colt? What'll it take to make you happy?

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

What are you doing?

What are you talking about?

What are you talking about?

What do you mean It could've gone better?

What gave it away? The smile on my face?

What if we both died?

What kind of dipshit pays 85 bucks for a pair of jeans?

What the fuck is Netflix?

What the fuck's on your feet?

What the fuck's on your feet?

What the hell are you doing here?

What the hell are you doing, man?

What the hell are you doing?

What the hell, man?

What time you leaving tomorrow?

What would happen to this place if I died?

What?

What?

What? Can't just stop in and say hi to my family?

What're you gonna do when North Korea comes knocking on the door?

What's happening here? Is this, like, a murder suicide kind of thing?

What's the starting salary?

What's the whole story, Dad?

When I slip...

When it comes to putting body parts into livestock,

When this place turns into an Applebee's.

When we came out of the tunnel.

When you can barely pay the bills around here?

When you go to school tomorrow, could you say hey to Shari for me?

When you got cut from that team in Alaska...

Where'd you get this?

Who cares? It's waterproof.

Who in the hell's coming up my driveway?

Who told you that?

Whoa, it is Abby.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Pull back, man. Abort.

Whoa.

Why are you here?

Why can't I help up here?

Why can't Rooster do it?

Why didn't you say anything?

Why do I got to put my arm in her?

Why would a horse walk into a bar?

Why would a horse walk into a bar?

Why would I put my bankin' info online?

Why you choose not to is beyond me.

Why? I like it here.

Why...

Will you two shut the hell up?

With a new semi pro team in Denver.

Without your boyfriend...

Woke up, there was a little mint next to my head.

Worth a shot.

Would you like a beer?

Wow, Colt.

Wow, I am not gonna lie to you.

Wow, I didn't realize I'd raised a quitter.

Wow, look at you.

Wow. 1999.

Wow. A Colt Bennett without football.

Yeah

Yeah, all right, he's tough on you.

Yeah, by the way, since when do you allow dogs in the house?

Yeah, hey, uh, if you ever get sick of staying at home,

Yeah, I know. I remember the Halloween when the kid came to the door

Yeah, I stay in touch with my son. You should try it.

Yeah, I think so. I'm a little nervous.

Yeah, I want you to have it.

Yeah, I'm gonna have to call BS on that one.

Yeah, it could've gone better.

Yeah, it needs a new head gasket. All right, I'll order one online

Yeah, it's a little sore

Yeah, it's just, I didn't hear the alarm, so...

Yeah, it's no big deal. We're all done here.

Yeah, like that'd happen.

Yeah, maybe you can play the Eye of the Tiger when I check in.

Yeah, no problem. Colt, go inside.

Yeah, no, I get it.

Yeah, that smell never really goes away.

Yeah, that was a surprise for both of us.

Yeah, that was not the vagina I thought I'd be in tonight.

Yeah, the coach had it out for me from day one.

Yeah, then you can go tell him you're a Democrat.

Yeah, we know.

Yeah, well, I don't mind doing the grunt work and being the beaver,

Yeah, well, Tom Brady gets away with a lot of shit.

Yeah, you know... No, it won't be weird,

Yeah, you too, Abby.

Yeah? For what?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Bonding. Great.

Yeah. Dad told me it's been kinda rough around here.

Yeah. Just taking it one play at a time.

Yeah. Why do you think I left, Dad? Because of you.

Yep. And we went to our first concert.

Yep. Florida State. '99.

Yes, sir. It was on my birthday.

Yes, sir. Living room!

Yes, that was a joke.

Yes, that was also a joke.

You always wanna use the same arm.

You and Dad still...

You better hide your toothbrush tonight.

You can start with me.

You can't ask 'em to pay rent,

You can't win the lotto if you don't buy a ticket, right?

You comin' or what?

You coulda just called. But instead, you drove 15 miles...

You don't have to make love to her,

You don't know how to make coffee?

You don't wanna start this with me, Dad.

You drove me out of here!

You ever think about getting a bigger place, Mom?

You get to talk on that phone.

You gonna order a gun on Amazon?

You got anything else you wanna take a shot at?

You got no place else to go!

You guys already ate? You couldn't have woke me?

You had to craft a new one with your own bare hands.

You had your arm up a cow and made out with a calf.

You have any complaints about the service, take it up with the owner.

You have the worst temper.

You haven't been around this family the last 15 years.

You knew about this?

You know I can't grow here.

You know what I'm gonna do?

You know what you could do?

You know what you should do to really mess with him?

You know what? You can't see it, but I'm flippin' you the bird right now.

You know, 'cause he gets all...

You know, a pee gasm.

You know, all in all, it was a good day.

You know, cold.

You know, Dad, you can't really hear silence.

You know, did it ever occur to you

You know, has it ever crossed your mind

You know, he's just like you.

You know, I don't think it's rained here since you left.

You know, I just wanna point out...

You know, I really didn't think there was gonna be a follow up question.

You know, I think Dad needs another 1,500 acres.

You know, I'm proud of you, too.

You know, I've found that the happier you are, the less you need.

You know, if someone took a picture of us...

You know, in 8th grade, I used your toothbrush to scrub my balls.

You know, it's possible you're not having sex right.

You know, my advice is

You know, now seems like a bad time to be honest.

You know, that's the beauty of having somebody beggin' for a place to stay.

You know, there's a lot worse guys in this town

You know, we'll both bail.

You know, we're all playing our roles.

You know, when I was your age, you broke a tool,

You know, when the going gets tough, you have a tendency to run.

You know, where do you get off being so high and mighty

You know, you diddle a chicken, you're in the farmer's Hall of Fame.

You know, you get to spray it up and melt it down.

You know...

You like annoying a man holding a skill saw?

You like Florida Georgia Line?

You made fun of my career, you made fun of my childhood.

You made fun of my clothes,

You never wanna leave the house.

You punched out the mascot.

You ready for your tryout?

You ready for your tryout?

You think that's bad, it talks, too.

You wanna stay for breakfast?

You wanted to start helping out around here.

You were a hell of a football player. And you had to go.

You were having girl problems, I was making fun of you?

You were really hot.

You would not believe the discounts he gets.

You, too.

You're 34.

You're a bunch of lazy bastards.

You're a guy dreamin' about being a football player.

You're a sight for sore eyes.

You're Colt Bennett.

You're dating Pregnant Linda!

You're gonna go shovel out the bull barn

You're kidding, right?

You're kidding, right?

You're like a beaver, right?

You're my little brother, amigo.

You're not a football player, Colt.

You're not gonna need a hammer. You need a shovel.

You're not gonna need a hammer. You need a shovel.

You're not leaving!

You're right.

You're serious?

You're sitting on a suitcase, son.

You're standing awful tall for a man who came

You're the good son.

You're wasting your time.

You've been telling me to give it up for years.

You've either smoked it or drank it or screwed it away.

You've got no sense of humor at all.

Your brother is a 34 year old child.

Your father and I used all the whipped cream up last night.

Your father has a 1,500 acre ranch.

Your father.

Your silence speaks volumes.

A lot of firsts in this truck. All right, take it easy.

All right, I got her legs. Good.

Come on, Colt. Hustle it up. I'm coming.

Come on. Yeah, I got it!

crawling back on his hands and knees! Hey. Hey!

Did he just... Yeah. He just said, Good job.

Do the dishes. Funny.

Do you want some coffee? Sure.

Do you work here? No.

Don't touch me. All right, relax, guys.

Fine. Fine.

Good. Good.

Hey, Abby! Hey, what's going on?

Hey, I would like a Jack and Coke. Wait.

Hey, Ma, could you grab me a beer? Sure, darlin'.

Hey, Mrs. Bennett. Hey, darlin'.

Hey, you wanna hear a joke? No.

Hey. Hey, how'd it go?

Hey. What are you doing here?

Hmm. Her 18th birthday looked really fun.

How's it going with your dad? Hmm.

How's she doin'? It's a breech.

I got a 7:00 a.m. detention. Detention? Wow!

I want to make sure it's not weird. Yeah, yeah. Uh...

I'm 22. Even better.

I'm not gonna get you coffee! Then get the hell out of here.

It's like that song. Okay, wait. Focus, honey.

Knock knock. Who's there?

Left the damn gate open. Okay, that wasn't my fault.

Let me tell you one. Go ahead.

Linda Miller. Linda Miller?

Looked good out there, Bennett. Oh, hey, thanks.

Mmm hmm. That ain't even a half a scoop.

Morning. We got a lot of work to do today.

Not gonna tell you where. Let me guess

Oh. Uh, what you been up to?

Really? Oh, and a couple times a year,

Rooster? Yes, my eagle.

Rooster. Fine.

Rough day with him? Actually, I didn't see him all day.

Seriously? Yeah.

So it won't be awkward anymore? No, it won't.

Thank you. Rooster and I were just discussing

This is totally different. Okay.

Uh... Yeah, I gotta get going.

What can I get for you, Abby? Oh, just a water.

What other bastard? God.

What time is it? 6:30.

who could be dating your ex. Yeah, like who?

Who's that? Oh, booty call.

Why? 'Cause I didn't show up till day three.

Yeah. You look great.

You look good, Ma. I'm all right.

You still got the old truck. Mmm.

You... Hey!

...a six foot hole in the ground and drop me in it.

'Cause I still don't know whether or not you had sex with my ex girlfriend.

'cause it holds up the whole pole. It's all about the base.

'Cause you were just as sure when you said the moon landing was fake.

'Cause you're both too stubborn to admit it's either one of your fault.

♪ Baby, you a song ♪

♪ Cruise ♪

♪ Good lord She had them long tanned legs ♪

♪ Poppin' right out Of the South Georgia water ♪

♪ Yeah, when I first saw Bikini top on her ♪

♪ You make me wanna Roll my windows down ♪