Peter Sellers Soundboard Edit

And I can swear to you my boy swear to you that there's nothing wrong with my bodily fluids not a thing jackie

But how is it possible for this thing to be triggered automatically and at the same time impossible to untrigger

Colonel that coca cola machine I want you to shoot the lock off it there may be some change in there

Deterrence is the art of producing in the mind of the enemy the fear to attack

Do I take it sir that you are threatening a brother officer with a gun

Don't say that you're more sorry than I am because I am capable of being just as sorry as you are so we're both sorry all right all right

Gentlemen you can't fight in here! this is the war room!

I drink a lot of water you know i'm what you might call a water man jack that's what I am

I'm a religious man myself you know jack I believe in all that sort of thing

I'm afraid sir I must ask you for the key and the recall code have you got them handy sir

I'm very sorry all right you're sorrier than I am but I am sorry as well

It could easily be accomplished with a computer

It's a friendly call of course it's a friendly call listen if it wasn't friendly you probably wouldn't have even got it

Shoot it off! shoot with a gun that's what the bullets are for you twit!

The strange thing is they make such bloody good cameras

The women will have to be selected for their sexual characteristics which will have to be of a highly stimulating nature

This man is obviously a psychotic

Why do you think i'm calling you just to say hello of course I like to speak to you of course I like to say hello

Yes I mean if we are unable to recall the planes then i'd say that well we're just going to have to help you destroy them dmitri

You with your gun and me with the belt and the ammo feeding you jack