Hamster & Gretel - Season 1 Edit

A blackout.

A grade schooler...

A lot of us are still trying to work through.

A love story for the ages.

A miracle.

A new age starts today.

A storm came in. The horse got spooked and the tower fell on me.

A train chase ago?

After we save the city.

After you save the city.

Again, that's math!

Ah, it went out of business.

Ah, you were so cute.

Ah! Welcome, Hamster and Gretel.

Ahh! we're all gonna die!

ALIEN VOICE: Greetings, Earth creatures.

ALIEN VOICE: Greetings, Earth creatures.

All I got is $5.

All right, fine. You save the day.

All right, well, have fun with that.

All right.

All right. Next question. MAN: Yeah, if you got...

All right. She can already be inside.

All right. You're good to go. Wait.

All the most important moments of our lives.

And 45 feet... Ugh!

And access information from all over the world.

And although the comedic violence

And by that I mean an old age, a bygone age.

And gives me the most amazing gift ever.

And glue. And glue.

And he meant a lot not only to you and Bailey,

And her abuela had family dinner night.

And her name's Gretel.

And her pet.

And I don't wanna do math.

And I had a score to settle with cell phones.

And I only just nicked the water. Ahh!

And I'm pretty sure our caveman ancestors

And I've got them both trapped.

And I've got, like, no bars...

And innocence for the entire community.

And it makes me feel terrible.

And now for the final touch.

And on Friday, you're taking me to Tina's birthday party.

And send it back into space.

And she has a hamster named Hamster.

And so you made another one from our family recipe.

And test your mettle against me, Professor Exclamation.

And that keeps us connected

And that shuts off the power to your little trap.

And that's a job for the police.

And the van's almost dry.

And The Vengeance Gather number 36.

And then I actually got to meet her.

And then I dropped it.

And then I got struck by lightning.

And then Saturday, I've got ballet.

And this is why we don't serve rodents.

And use them for evil.

And use them for good.

And we're almost out of time.

And where's mine? Just lift your feet. (GRUNTING)

And where's the problem?

And whoop up on the bad guys?

And why are your clothes wet?

And you are a super, little sister.

And you didn't think to call yourself Lightning Rod?

And you have a date to get back to.

ANNOUNCER: Action News, Drainage cam.

ANNOUNCER: This is an Action News special report.

As the beckoning horizon pulled me ever onwards.

Aw, Kevin. You're a great big brother.

Aw, now I can't anonymously criticize my friends.

Aw, that's so sweet.

Ay, ask your father.

Ay, ask your father.

Ay, mi amore!

Ay, mi amore. That makes me so happy.

Ay! You're one of Kevin's friends?

Ay. I know it doesn't always go smoothly.

Bad Guy Punch!

Bailey was there. And I had to sign a T shirt to myself.

Balloon man child is trending on the Internet,

Because big brothers always take care of their little sisters.

Because it would take a miracle to put this fire out now.

Because she punched... I get it.

Because that's our family tradition.

Because we're eating ropa vieja.

Before you guess them all.

BOTH: Ooh!

BOTH: The queens of the tree!

But as luck would have it, I can't go.

But I bet I can beat him there.

But I guess she doesn't need me anymore.

But if I hold him up like this, he thinks he's running super fast.

But instead I'm just spinning my wheels and going nowhere.

But instead, I'm just driving my little sister

But it's heading away from downtown towards the...

But most of them will be... How about super strength?

But so many other kids and families.

But the water main has burst...

But the Wi Fi is out.

But they may not finish in time.

But things are different now.

But we still make food from our family recipes.

But what can I do?

But with more snacks.

But you know what happens when everybody

But you saved the city.

But you won't have a lot of time.

But, feel good about yourself if you want to.

But, maybe Oakey's passing is not entirely in vain.

Can I give you my gift now?

Can we get...

Can you fix it? Can you fix it? Can you fix it?

Can you imagine?

Can you just give us a minute?

Can you sign this T shirt for her?

Can you wait right here?

Cancel your plans.

Casa Ropa Vieja?

Chauffeur to a grade schooler.

Chief, I got word from downtown.

Chosen for what?

Chosen to be heroes.

Come on, Gretel.

Come on. I bet I'm indestructible.

Come on. I've got to get you to that mall appearance.

Comic shop? Yeah, I think we got time.

Consequences that cannot be solved

Could we get on with my incarceration?

Dad, just make sure you backed up that file.

Did she say hi back?

Did you hire them to distract me, Clyde?

Didn't you hear my tragic backstory?

Dirt cake?

Do not tell Gretel, because she's gonna wanna fight him.

Do you know what you're going to say?

Does that mean you have it or you don't have it?

Don't do that. Sorry.

Don't push it.

Don't worry, it's all uploaded to the cloud.

Don't! Gretel, wait.

Down these lines to the city's main cell phone tower.

Drop the cell phone.

Dude, you've got to roll with the punches. See what I did there.

Eh, well. Let's call it a day.

Even slower than that.

Even though a jillion isn't a number,

Everyone, even superheroes, need to learn math.

Everyone's going to get suspicious.

Explicitly emanating from their fingertips and gets away with it.

Family tradition.

Family traditions.

Fascinating. But what exactly are the roots

For my family dinner.

For old time's sake.

For some reason in a cowboy costume.

For someone who just saved the city.

Frankly, I'm surprised you're not watching it.

Fred is doing the math right now.

Fred, you're friends with the Duck Boyz guitarist, right?

FRED: Hey. What are you doing?

From my army of evil robots. (SINISTER MUSIC PLAYING)

From your mind numbing talkie boxes.

Get in the picture.

Get out there!

Go ahead, young lady.

Go! Go, go, go, go!

Going to make you cry so hard, honey, once you see it.

GPS on our phones.

Grab it, Hamster.

Great. that's the opening.

Gretel, I said we're going to do that math homework.

Gretel, wait.

Gretel, what did you do when the water main burst?

Gretel, which way is Hamster going?

Gretel, you can have a whole conversation with her

Gretel, you did it. You used math.

GRETEL: Don't have it. Obviously.

GRETEL: How fast are you traveling?

GRETEL: Kevin. The armadillo is in the blender.

GRETEL: Rodney Thunderpants. At your service, ma'am.

GRETEL: Still don't have it.

GRETEL: Two hours!

GRETEL: Won't it come back when we plug it back in?

Gretel! Gretel, where are you?

Gretel! That's the one. Now I need you to...

Gretel! We don't know if you can breathe underwater yet!

Gretel. It's math homework, not coal mining.

Gretel... Kevin, I'm a superhero now.

Guys, hurry! Get in.

Had family dinner night.

Hamster and Gretel have entered the pipe,

Hamster and Gretel have saved the day.

Hamster and Gretel.

Hamster needs to go to the bathroom, too.

Hamster, got any money?

Hamster, push me.

Hamster, what are we going to do?

Hamster's following your twisty turny thing.

Have you guys found it yet?

Have you tried the Casa Ropa Vieja on Green Street?

He won't know the difference.

He's a sweat piece, just like his old man.

He's at a concert with a girl.

Hello, uh...

Help!

Here it is.

Here there's a bunch of free popcorn downtown.

Hey, Kevin. Why don't you hop in?

Hey, that mouse ate my pants.

Hey, you missed their new single.

Hey. Hey.

Hi, Hiromi.

Hi, mi amore. Thank you.

Hiromi. (SHUSHING)

Hiromi's out there. How am I gonna explain this?

Hm. Maybe I'm not doing it right?

Honey, can you help me put stuff

How am I supposed to remember all that?

How deep is this gulch?

How do you know my name?

How long will it take the train to reach point B?

How will I know? Well...

How'd you know we had plans?

Howdy, folks, I'm here to free you all

I believe in you. Can you just get in the van?

I bet you got tickets.

I came upon a new cell phone tower

I can cook it faster with my heat vision.

I can't believe Oakey is gone.

I can't believe this.

I changed the code.

I could be out in the open road with nothing but my own dreams to guide me.

I could be out there making my own destiny,

I could let the wind of adventure blow back my hair

I couldn't hear you. I was busy not doing math.

I did actually. Two of them.

I don't get invited.

I don't get paid enough for this.

I don't have a family or dinner?

I don't know. Puberty.

I don't want to stay here and be bored.

I don't?

I downloaded it before we left.

I got struck by lightning three more times.

I guess it was pretty cool.

I guess so. But imagine if you were trying

I guess you care about family traditions after all.

I had it professionally edited and it's three hours long

I have no idea.

I have the much more difficult job

I hired these guys.

I just forgot my shopping list.

I just got to load it.

I just need to unlock the door.

I just want to know

I know just the thing we could do together.

I know why you still like to come here.

I know you can hear me.

I know, but it's just too dangerous.

I know. This is awesome, right?

I made my own tunnel.

I mean, I know you've got all these powers now, but I...

I mean, when do we get to fight crime

I only told you because I knew you

I prefer a time when phones were dumb,

I quit.

I quit.

I really used to like this place, didn't I?

I say we just punch it.

I thought that was you.

I told her she couldn't.

I tracked down this rare family heirloom

I tried to get tickets but they were sold out.

I wanna ruin Bethany's life with this text,

I want to be bored at Bailey's house.

I was going to give my cousin Kevin here, one of them.

I was going to win this anniversary.

I was just about to send out a search party.

I was looking for my nice cousin Kevin,

I was taking care of my little sister.

I was telling you about?

I was trying so hard to be part of the team,

I was winning!

I'd rather mine coal than do math.

I'd rather mine coal.

I'll be right in there.

I'll be right with you.

I'll just send this here electromagnetic pulse

I'll keep track of him so you can come and get him

I'll talk to you later, Fred. I gotta roll.

I'm flying faster than the speed of sound.

I'm getting out of your way. Finally.

I'm getting you out of here. This is too dangerous.

I'm going to die with the lightning themed cowboy.

I'm going to give her a video documenting

I'm here with my entire photography class.

I'm just gonna go straight. You know I can punch through walls, right?

I'm just gonna punch it.

I'm just gonna... (FLICKING SWITCH)

I'm not living one. Gretel is.

I'm only gonna ask once nicely. (CRACKS KNUCKLES)

I'm sorry. Are we interrupting something?

I'm superhero adjacent.

I'm the brains? I am part of the team.

I'm using my muscles. It's just not... What is going on?

I'm working up to it.

I'm your big brother.

I've flute lessons tomorrow, remember?

I've got an exclamation point on my...

If anyone needs me, I'll be in my wheel. Wait.

If point B is 60 miles away,

If the train carrying my brother and

If we'd have been up here on Oakey, we might have seen them.

If you remove three of the wires, in America...

If you're just joining us,

If you're watching at home, there's something we...

In a related story, a scrawny, 16 year old boy

In a trap that feeds off the city's power grid. Yes, I heard.

In our defense, this is a laundromat.

In the oven for two hours.

Indoor or patio?

Is a mystery

Is it done? Si.

Is it ready? Mom's right behind me.

Is it you? Sometimes you're a problem.

Is that pipe a possible avenue of rescue?

Is that so?

Is the one with no superpowers whatsoever.

Is using his tiny muscles, not helping in any way, whatsoever.

Isn't it illegal to make kids work?

It doesn't taste like Mom's.

It draws power directly from the city's power grid.

It is kind of nice to be here.

It looks perfect.

It must be the right one.

It will fry every cell phone and every tablet, for 50 miles.

It's a good thing it's been evacuated

It's a new age, y'all!

It's a puberty thing.

It's a video documenting all of the most important moments of our lives.

It's about appliances.

It's because of that broken water main

It's cake that looks like dirt.

It's easy. Just lift your feet. Wait.

It's going to make her cry.

It's gonna blow.

It's gonna miss the earth by two degrees.

It's in the side of a cliff. Exactly.

It's just that... (SIGHS) She never listens to me.

It's loading.

It's made of cement. Yeah. That's it. Now...

It's my job to look out for you.

It's not about winning, mi amor.

It's not as easy as you make it...

It's not fair. It's not fair.

It's not that complicated. It's just three rights, and a left.

It's okay. I got it. (GRUNTING)

It's probably gonna be on fire.

It's special because we're eating Mom's ropa vieja.

Jamie Boy. (SOBBING)

Just don't let it hit the power plant.

Just give it a second.

Just like Hamster.

Just like when you were young.

Just like you.

Just like you.

Just when I thought they couldn't intrude more into our lives,

Keep the change, ma'am.

Kevin will think of something, and then you'll be in trouble.

Kevin, help us!

Kevin, we have a problem.

Kevin, we made it. But what do we do now? Kevin?

Kevin, what are you doing?

Kevin, where are you?

Kevin, you can't fight him.

Kevin, you're not just driving me to soccer.

KEVIN: (PANTING) We've got to lift...

KEVIN: He was a great old tree,

KEVIN: I just realized family dinner night isn't special

KEVIN: Well, well, well.

Kevin! Help!

Kevin.

Kevin.

Kevin.

Kids. I did it. I did it.

Kind of random that you still read superhero stories

Ladies and gentlemen, once again,

Let's fly.

Let's go make some more memories like that.

Let's open it up for some questions from the audience.

Let's see if you're hero enough to save City Hall

Like when you used to drag me to the supermarket

Look at him go.

Look, Chief. It's Hamster and Gretel.

Look, Gretel. You've got to take my instructions more seriously.

Look, we fix it with our superhuman strength and speed.

Looks like everything turned out just fine.

Looks like they're evacuating the building,

Looks like we're all done.

Madre mia.

MAN: (ON TV) That's right, ladies and gentlemen.

MAN: Dave and Carolina.

MAN: This is a message for the... Wait.

MAN: What's been going on with that asteroid we've been tracking?

Math!

Maybe I should get myself one of them smartphones.

Maybe sometimes there are consequences to our actions.

Maybe we could do something else.

Maybe we've learned a lesson here today.

Maybe you're not using your muscles or something.

Me and Hamster... We've got this.

Meanly.

Meteor Punch!

Mmm. Too salty.

Mmm...

Mom and Kevin quality time.

Mom, I... I need to go to the bathroom.

Mom, you posted this.

MOM: Here we go! Unlocking.

MOM: I'm back.

MOM: Why are you screaming?

Mom. You know what I miss?

Mr. Thunderpants, even supervillains need... Anyway,

Mr. Thunderpants, why are you doing this?

My abuela had family dinner night.

My best friend looks just like you,

My cappuccino phone photos are gone.

My special ropa vieja needs to cook

Negative. The buffalo is in the dishwasher.

Never rose to the level of mayhem,

Nice.

No water pressure?

No way!

No way. Yes way.

No, I can't.

No, I did not, Andrew.

No, no, no, no, no! (GASPS)

No, no, no, no. (ENGINE SPUTTERING)

No, no. That's me.

No, there's a runoff drainage system

No, times a jillion. That's math.

No, we left the picnic an hour ago.

No!

No. (SIGHS) Not really. But I figured...

No. That's the light for the backdrop.

Nobody zaps my partner with bolts of electricity

Nope. Yes.

Not just you.

Nothing. Gretel's out there whooping up on the bad guys.

Now I'm gonna need you to make those specific turns we talked about...

Now you need to lift the shell and...

Now you're just another Duck boy.

Now you're just showing off.

Now, a train is traveling...

Now, I don't care much for smartphones.

Now, if only we could apply this lesson to your history homework, then...

Now, time for my getaway in the only mechanical machinery I like.

Now, you and Hamster need to lift the shell...

Oakey is always going to be here for us.

Oakey was a symbol of purity

Oakey!

Oakey!

Of course, mi corazon. Excuse me, sir.

Of course, we shouldn't buy it from a restaurant,

Of getting Gretel to do her math homework.

Of the concert tonight, along with everyone else in town.

Of your deep seated animosity towards progress?

Oh no, there's a new supervillain in town.

Oh, 'cause I'm a "super villain,"

Oh, and a lump of coal if you have it.

Oh, come on. (ENGINE HISSING)

Oh, great. My GPS just went out.

Oh, Hamster's going in.

Oh, I get it.

Oh, I have to go to the market to pick up a few things.

Oh, it is so on.

Oh, just call me Lightning Rod.

Oh, let the boy be.

Oh, look, that's the old farm we used to go to.

Oh, look, the balloon man.

Oh, no. It's inaccessible, sticking out the side of a cliff like that.

Oh, no. You are not getting out of family dinner night.

Oh, so cool.

Oh, sure, Bailey.

Oh, that was easy. Hamster just drank all the water.

Oh, that? It's... It's, uh...

Oh, that's so nice.

Oh, that's the reason I chose tonight.

Oh, tragic backstory time. (CLEARS THROAT)

Oh, uh, you know that adolescent burning smell

Oh, whatever. What are you going to do?

Oh, yeah. I'm heading over. (ENGINE STARTING)

Oh, yeah. Things get pretty wild around here.

Oh! Hey.

Oh! We thought that was burned ropa vieja.

Okay, Gretel, did you get that?

Okay, let's hose her down.

Okay, the water pressure is too low.

Okay, they're gonna let you make the announcement right after this song,

Okay, you beat me. But, look.

Okay? It's dry.

Okay.

Okay. Don't panic. Do not panic.

Okay. I found the pipe.

Okay. I guess some of them are imaginable,

Okay. Thanks. Got to go save my brother.

On my hat.

On that branch right there. And look at us now.

On the base of the tank and attach...

On the complexities of modern life.

On the conveyor belt?

Once hailed as a brilliant satire

Once this energy pulse hits that tower,

One day there's going to be a problem you can't fix with a punch.

One night only. Until they fly...

Only, like, a small animal or maybe

Ooh, like the power to fly?

Ooh. So random, right?

Or punch bad guys.

Out there on the range while riding on my trusty horse, Delilah.

Over at the park.

People are in trouble.

People still even use trains?

People were smart and horses were faithful.

Perfect. Now we'll just... Ahh!

Permanently! Yee haw!

Personal electronic devices utterly useless.

Phil, has this boulder cut off the supply of air to the actual kitten?

Phones can do that?

Plus, it's really small.

Plus, you know, video games.

Powers unimaginable!

Powers unimaginable.

Pre electrical.

Put your phone down and focus. (GROANS WITH IRRITATION)

Relax, Kevin. Gretel, we don't know what will happen if...

Relax. I got this.

Remember the kindergarten field trip?

Repeat, the armadillo is in the blender.

Rescue efforts have been complicated,

Right, because of my disdain for people.

Right, right. We're lifting. (GRUNTING)

Robot Punch!

Say hi for me. Uh, Gretel says, "Hi."

SCARY VOICE: Kevin.

See what I did there.

Seriously, dude. You should just ask her out.

She was super nice and she was even more like you in person.

She's waiting for you over by that tree you like.

Should I go in, then? I think I'm gonna go in.

Should I wait for her outside or...

Sir, we need to shut down the tower before that energy ball gets here.

So as long as this city has power, you are my prisoners.

So basically the same thing you do during the day,

So cancel your plans.

So cancel your plans.

So Gretel still hasn't told Bailey yet?

So hard to make a new one.

So that feels good.

So there should be adequate...

So this here must be the... Ah! There.

So we had to drive around a little.

So we're gonna need to take the water from that tower up there.

So what are we doing with this?

So when do we get to be real superheroes? What do you mean?

So why are we here again?

So, let me get this straight. The person I should be worried about

So, question two, a train is traveling from point A to point B at 30 miles an hour.

So, you shoot lightning and your name is Rodney?

So? I put that police scanner app on your phone.

Sometimes I smell like burning.

Sometimes we get into fights or spill stuff,

Sorry about the roof.

Sorry. We don't make ropa vieja.

Sorry. We don't serve rodents.

Speaking of which, she wants to fight actual crime now.

Stop! Stop! Stop!

Superhero Gretel has decided to make her family recipe.

Superhero team. Superheroes!

Superpowers?

Supervillain, over a plate of what my translation app

Sure. Hey, where's Kevin?

Sweat proud, son.

Ta da!

Tell me about it. (HORSE WHINNIES)

Tells me is "old clothes."

Thanks anyway.

Thanks for the locket, mi vida.

Thanks, Bailey. I love it.

Thanks, Fred. Let's hope it works.

Thanks, Kevin.

Thanks, mister.

That balancing a boulder is often fraught with peril.

That empties out the side of a cliff,

That feels good.

That Hamster and Gretel were in this actual park yesterday.

That is...

That makes me so happy.

That means I've got to think of something.

That means... We've got this.

That's an ominous cloud.

That's just "old clothes."

That's right.

That's right. Come on down

That's way too complicated.

That's what I heard. Yes, specifically evil.

That's when you and I became best friends

That's where you wanna... I don't see any other pipes.

That's your abuela's special dirt cake.

The boulder came from the installation art piece,

The Duck Boyz want you to do.

The Duck Boyz, live in concert.

The lightning powered cowboy supervillain is traveling 60 miles an hour...

The mayor gave everyone the night off

The only thing special about you is your sister,

The piece is now just another grim reminder

The place with the pony rides?

The queens of the tree.

The Totally Tools building, downtown.

The two of us.

The two of you have been chosen.

Then, math. What did you say after save the day?

Then, we'll just get some chips and guac.

Then, what's this?

There are five wires plugged into five outlets.

They ended early because of the blackout.

They fixed the water pressure.

They said the power of flight, right?

They said the two of us were supposed to get powers.

They saved the kitten from a well over by that silly clown statue.

They specifically said, the two... (CLANKING)

They weren't even talking to you.

They're always better than my gifts

Think of something. You are the brains.

This energy cage is unbreakable even by the two of you.

This guy's trying to take over City Hall.

This is a message for the so called "superheroes"

This is better than any gift I've ever given.

This is dangerous.

This is it. This is my destiny.

This is my life.

This is my life.

This is not as comfortable as it looks.

This is perfect!

This is Rodney Thunderpants, a lightning themed supervillain,

This is so great.

This is Veronica Hill, on the scene at Cliffside Park,

This is, uh, taking longer than I thought.

This ropa vieja is mine.

This story comes

This year, I'm gonna win.

Those techno mological contraptions are nothing but trouble.

Three percent, three percent.

Three rights is a left. I think I should just go straight.

Through a water main and flood the well.

To an annoyingly heartfelt conclusion.

To and from soccer in my mom's minivan.

To download something really, really important,

To our culture and to each other.

To watch the live broadcast of the Duck Boyz concert.

Tonight I am finally going to make your mother cry.

Tonight is the television event you've been waiting for.

Too spicy. Too ropa.

Too vieja. This actually is old clothes.

Two percent, two percent, three percent.

Two seconds, because I'll fly there. Problem solved.

Ugh, superheroes don't need math.

Ugh! Can you fix it, Lyle?

Ugh! We can't leave now.

Uh oh.

Uh oh.

Uh, can you, slowly, get me a balloon?

Uh, I have to go to the bathroom.

Uh, Kevin? Hiromi?

Uh, too complicated.

Uh, too late. I already put the same app on her phone.

Uh...

Uh... Wait, Was that an actual supervillain?

Um, at your anniversary dinner?

Um, honey...

Um, Mom...

Um, okay.

Um, sure. But she's got her own ticket.

Um, yeah.

Um... Hey, Mom.

Unless we do some simple math.

Up next,

Up, up, and away.

Use this hose.

Use your powers wisely

Use your powers wisely.

Uses their appliances at the same time?

Veronica Hill here on the scene at Casa Ropa Vieja,

Veronica Hill on scene downtown,

Wait, is that Fred? Yes.

Wait, that's not... Gretel.

Wait, there seems to be some action at the pipe.

Wait, wait, honey, I want to go first.

Wait, wait. No, no.

Wait, what are you doing?

Wait. Did he just say evil?

Wait. How did you guys get here so fast?

Wait. My phone is dead.

Wait. Oh, no. No, no, no, no!

Wait. The ropa vieja was in the top oven?

Wait. What just happened?

Wait...

Walk me to my car? Yeah, sure.

Wall punch! KEVIN: Gretel, no. Just...

Want to go to the bathroom?

Watchin' the world change before my eyes

Water Tower Punch!

We are not testing that out.

We burned your ropa vieja. And we worked

We can do it!

We can get a replacement before Mom gets back.

We can't get out. Yes.

We can't touch it. How're we gonna stop it?

We did it. We saved the tower.

We don't know the composition or the mass of the meteor.

We got done in half the time.

We got four minutes before that meteor hits

We got the napkins.

We gotta stop this.

We have to fly 180 miles an hour.

We have to watch an oven for two hours?

We haven't found any good ropa vieja

We need some ropa vieja on the double.

We need to document this moment.

We only have 20 minutes.

We should have looked there first.

We should make it from Mom's recipe

We will now bestow upon you

We will now bestow upon you,

We will. Bye, Mr. Alien.

We'll give you a lift.

We'll let your father eat this one.

We'll see you at home.

We'll take it. I'll take it.

We're going as fast as we can.

We're going to use this to change the direction of the meteor

We're just going to start bestowing now

We're three miles away from Dead Person's Gulch

We've got no water pressure, Chief.

We've got superpowers.

Weird. And why do I always end up wet?