Parks and Recreation - Season 7 Edit

A hero named...

A lot has been done.

A multi platform media experience.

A new chapter in Pawnee's history.

A single daisy, like this.

About Brittany Murphy,

About the logistics of how to start

Aches with loss,

Action.

Actually, you should be President.

After all these years in government,

Again. (LAUGHS)

Ah guh guh goink! (FARTING SOUND)

All I really want to do is dance.

All my life, I pray for someone like you

All right, "B". Let me know. Yeah

All right. I'm gonna find April.

ALL: (SINGING) All my life

Also, he sent us a brief video message

Also, I'm retiring.

An action movie, with explosive graphics,

An underground dance competition.

An underground dance competition.

And after that we ate late night pancakes at J.J.'s.

And as per his final wish, his body will lie in state,

And as per his final wish, his body will lie in state,

And cut. Oh, my gosh

And get these three things.

And given your family name and how well liked you are,

And goodbye forever.

And his lover.

And I do the chandelier design for my friend's

And I don't wanna erase it.

And I guess what I'm trying to say is,

And I have just the thing.

And I hope that you feel the same way, too

And I hope that you feel the same way, too

And I love you, my brother.

And I need it by tomorrow.

And I need it in 20 minutes. (GROANS)

And I spend all of my time

And I tried to show you a magic trick

And I'm very scared that everything is falling apart.

And I've never been a fan of change.

And if there is blame,

And if you became Mayor of Pawnee,

And it definitely kept me happy.

And meet me at the Snakehole Lounge in 30 minutes.

And not just because he was a dynamite lay.

And now, here to say a few words

And Sal lived a good, long life.

And she has a twin sister,

And some gross things with those juicy City Hall interns.

And that I want you and all people on Earth to be miserable. Right?

And then he'd always ask me about the same thing.

And then we can let the notary fireworks begin!

And while we were there,

And you've lost it. No.

Andrew, stop speaking to this man.

APRIL: You should totally do it.

Are filled with Euro trash.

Are his barber,

As you know I don't believe in tipping,

At the Department of the Interior.

Aw, jeez. Leslie...

Bad news comes in threes, right?

Because for 46 wonderful years,

Because I'm only 27 years old.

Because if you wait, before you know it... Boom!

Because we're gonna be splitting our time.

Because you took too long and I got bored.

Because, beloved Pawnee Mayor Walter Gunderson

Before I die, I'm freezing my head like Ted Williams.

Being nice made me feel terrible

BEN: Oh, okay. That's fine.

BEN: Oh, that's awesome

Ben. Give her some money. It's easier.

BOTH: Tom Haverford.

Buck up, Swanson.

But I think I'm ready to try it again.

But I wasn't really doing very much

But I'm gonna. I'm gonna.

But is actually a really big deal.

But it's part of my life.

But keep an open mind.

But sadly, I cannot

But so much is changing,

But someone here will.

But to sincerely ask me if I was mentally stable.

But we are about to begin

But who is gonna be the mayor

But you seem like James Bond right now.

Buzz Aldrin, nice to meet you.

Carl. (CHUCKLES)

Catch you on the flipside, Tom egranate Juice

Choosing to ignore what you just said,

City Councilor.

Communicating with the public.

Daddy, someone set a fire in your car

Death is natural, Andrew.

Death makes brothers of us all.

Do you have $600,000?

Don't follow me!

Donna, Andy, this is Carl.

Donna, this is crazy.

DONNA: Speak for yourself.

DONNA: We're so sorry, Ron.

Donna's leaving. That's three!

Drag puppet show.

Either by our body's natural decay

Ethel Beavers.

Euro trash. (CHUCKLES) I like that

Every nook and cranny of my body.

Every time we lose a compadre,

Everyone was on their stupid bikes

Everything in life is always just so fun, right?

Exactly. And I will help you with the proposal. What do you wanna do?

Except lately, all the good warehouse raves

Fast cars and a hero with one mission,

Fight. Fight, my puppets!

Fine, whatever, I'll help you. Okay?

Fine.

Fine. I will leave.

First Salvatore and now Mayor Gunderson.

For a public space.

For the next two months then?

Fortunately, the citizens of Pawnee didn't pay attention either.

Forty six years later, they're gone

Frankly, I'm stunned she's still even into me.

Garry Gergich!

Garry Gergich.

Garry.

Get him, boys.

Go, my puppets. Go, my puppets!

Go! Yes.

God, I don't think I can do it, though.

Good evening. I come to you tonight with some good news.

Good luck.

Good point. Everyone's scattering

Good to see you guys. It's been a while.

Got you a little gift in New York.

Grab Jean Ralphio,

Grow up, you prudes. We're all adults.

Gunderson was mayor my entire life.

Happy Inauguration Day, buddy.

Has died.

He is the worst human being on Earth.

He owns the deli right next to my barber Salvatore's shop.

He spent night after night exploring

Hello, Pawnee.

Here's a tenner, Sal.

Hey

Hey, April. Will you help me out with something?

Hey, babe.

Hey, babe.

Hey, Ben, have you ever been to space?

Hey, Bobby. Thanks for coming in.

Hey, lan.

Hey, not bad.

Hey, there's Lucy.

Hey, you look awful familiar. Have we met before?

Hey. Hey, guys. Listen.

Hey. It's pizza time.

Hey. It's the movie business, Ted.

Hi, Evelyn.

His butcher

Hold up. I will do John Mayer,

How was your trip? Amazing.

How would you like to be the next mayor of Pawnee, Indiana?

How you hate Europe and bicycles.

How's Leslie? Is she still, um...

I can understand that. A morning shock jock DJ the Mayor?

I can't believe I'm about to be the mayor.

I can't believe I'm about to notarize it.

I can't delay this forever. Excuse me.

I could do some great things for this city

I couldn't help but overhear.

I didn't ask for flavored condoms.

I don't know, Tom. I really don't.

I don't think I have time to be mayor.

I got her a really nice Burberry necktie.

I guess now is as good a time as any to make my announcement.

I had an appointment with Salvatore

I had the worst time in Berlin last May

I hate you so much.

I have an idea.

I have decided to finally retire.

I have lost one of those.

I have no idea what's happening,

I have ordered banners for every personal and professional event

I have spent nearly a hundred thousand dollars at your banner store.

I have to say, The Douche,

I haven't done this trick in a while,

I just had an amazing idea.

I just realized Lucy doesn't care about all that flashy stuff.

I just wanna say...

I learned on a David Blaine special.

I like that Ice Town happened.

I loved that man,

I mean, how married are you? Are you down to clown?

I named us.

I need a gigantic banner that says

I paid him $8.

I play for the Super Spinners.

I prayed for someone like you

I pulled out a deck of cards,

I sat in the same chair, Salvatore put the same cape over me.

I spent so long trying to forget about Ice Town,

I sure am sorry about your loss.

I tell ya, it's so hard to remember boring stuff like that.

I thank God (FIREWORKS BURSTING)

I think Lucy probably wants to hang, just the two of us

I think so. I don't really know

I thought you might be interested.

I was like, "Ew".

I was the second person to walk on the moon.

I wasn't paying attention most of the time.

I went to Northwestern

I will humbly take it.

I'll be brief.

I'll see you later, Jennifer Knope ez.

I'll take that one

I'm a cool dudette.

I'm flying!

I'm gonna turn the mayoral office

I'm in charge of appointing an interim mayor

I'm realizing I know nothing

I'm skeptical that your interest is sincere.

I'm sure our souls have collided

I'm sure the Russian guys who built the rocket would be cool with it.

I'm writing an electronic opera

I've always found that when my soul

I've seen Salvatore the first Tuesday

I've worked on two political campaigns,

Identical, and they keep...

In a man's life

In my experience, the only "constant" is change.

In one lifetime or another.

In the city council chambers for a day.

In the Senior Executive Service Development Candidate Program

Into my oral office. Boom!

Is his canvas.

Is it because I said, "It's pizza time"?

Is Mayor Gunderson's longtime friend and co worker,

Is not a sentence I will be saying to you right now.

Is that what you want? You want the big dog? Ahhh!

It can be anyone over the age of 30

It has completed its journey,

It is, indeed, a garbage continent.

It kept him happy.

It kept his wife happy.

It led me to Pawnee, to my job, to Leslie.

It really is.

It really makes you consider the postulence of time.

It set me on this path.

It simply sheds itself off.

It was perfect and beautiful.

It was perfect.

It will take you four minutes.

It's been torturing you since you were 18 years old.

It's best to turn to Eastern wisdom.

It's for real, Leslie.

It's like you said, death is natural.

It's terrible, isn't it?

It's your fault.

Joe and I just closed on a house in Seattle.

Just for two months.

Just get the right... Go under the...

Just listen. You're gonna cut the man's hair,

Just please be careful with my store?

Just under the wire

Just, everybody, cheer like crazy. Here we go.

Ladies and gentlemen, the new mayor

Les Legally Blonde.

Leslie, you have one line

LESLIE: The passing of our beloved

LESLIE: Ugh. I'm so glad we're leaving.

Listen, if you can't train 200 white doves in the next four hours

Look how raggedy my hair is.

Look. If you didn't wanna be on call 24/7 for emergencies,

Lot of great meetings. Plus, Lucy and I had the best time.

Lucy, your mission, should you choose to accept it is,

Man, that would be fun.

May actually be right about turning to the east.

Mayor Gunderson marks the end of an era.

Men's Ferragamo loafers.

Mmm. No, it's too gross.

Money, please! Money, please.

More good news, I finally found someone to be mayor.

My bad, no problem.

My credit card company called me about it,

My only regret is that I never told him how I really felt

My oral office.

My other businesses, my two terrible children.

My puppets!

My time in office has come to an end.

Nice to see you, Ron.

Nice try

No further questions

No time to explain, Les, but don't worry, I have a plan.

No way. Impossible.

No, but that definitely didn't help.

No, it wasn't. You just destroyed my case

No, no, no. Go a little bit over to the left.

No, that's not it. Are you in my Frisbee golf league?

No!

No.

No. Apparently, as city manager,

No. I don't wanna do this.

No. Jesus.

No. Listen to her message.

No. You were right to change course.

Not so fast, Haver fraud.

Not to question the charges,

Nothing

Now will you help me find someone?

Now, throw it out. I need a new one,

Of the great city of Pawnee, Indiana,

Of the month for the past four decades.

Of the universe.

Off the top of my head, I guess, my ideal proposal might be

Oh, come on.

Oh, come on. Think.

Oh, Ian, thank you so much. It's great.

Oh, it can't be.

Oh, it's big.

Oh, my God. That was so sweet.

Oh, no, no, that's just me looking out for you.

Oh, no! Really?

Oh, no. No, there's no money. Oh.

Oh, no. What do you want, Leslie?

Oh, notarizing a new mayor, that is...

Oh, Ron, you didn't hear?

Oh, that's it.

Oh, um...

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah, you completely disgraced yourself and destroyed an entire town.

Oh, yeah! Yes!

Oh, you want the big dog?

Oh.

Oh.

Oh. I'm on the Frisbee Champs. Ah, cool.

Oh. Zut alors!

Oh... (BLEEPS)

Okay

Okay, everybody in the van.

Okay, I already picked a place. (CHUCKLING)

Okay, Tom, there's your mark,

Okay, what are we doing?

Okay!

Okay. Ben.

Okay. So, look, just sign right there

Okay. Well.

On our first date, I gave you

Ooh! (LAUGHS) Mmm hmm.

Ooh! (LAUGHS) Mmm hmm.

Or by those younger and stronger.

Our collective lantern gets a little bit dimmer.

Over the past 15 years,

Pan left. I don't know what any of that means.

People are dying, moving, retiring.

People grieve in different ways.

Pick a card.

Please, talk more about

Plus, Lucy's not in town. She's in Philadelphia visiting friends.

Plus, this would erase Ice Town.

Quiet on the set!

Rack focus.

Really? Just one thing.

Really? So, you were born in the 1990s?

Ron.

Ruthlessly.

Salvatore passed away yesterday.

Salvatore was a constant in my life.

Same exact thing every time.

Scheduled for Tuesday.

See, girls get mad horny when you propose.

See, this guy knows what's what.

She gets back tomorrow. Yeah,

She's married to a French billionaire,

Shia LaBeouf is one hell of a jewelry designer, by the way.

Slap it on a robot, (CLICKS TONGUE) Keep on ballin'.

So I will collect my change from your wife.

So just shut up and make the man look like this

So when I give the signal,

So, I'll say it now.

So, my promotion is official.

So, Typhoon,

So, uh, if there's credit to take,

So, what's your story again?

So, what's your story again?

So, why don't you just appoint yourself?

Sorry about the audible.

Spiritual cowboy

Stunt double

Sure

Sure.

Surprise!

Swanson, this handsome

Ted, are we rolling?

Than an old man's public memorial?

Thank you

Thank you. I told Garry he could help too.

Thanks for coming in.

Thanks. It's a big deal.

That I

That I finally found you

That I've ever organized.

That was a heck of a lot of fun.

That'll be really fun, too.

That's 'cause of Leslie.

That's actually a good point.

That's not the way to her heart.

That's the guy from Toy Story.

That's three, Garry.

That's what they need for the deposit. BEN: Oh.

That's why I do it all the time.

The basic concept of outrageous pageantry?

The high stakes world of banner making!

The man's really found his calling.

The most expensive one.

The Snakehole Lounge is where we first met.

The three most important people

Then you have no business calling yourself a pet store

Then you should not have gone into

There are hundreds of people waiting for us.

There you go

There's got to be someone.

There's still a very big celebration

They're a size six and a half, too small for you anyway.

This is about people who are moving, Garry. Not everything is about you.

This is as eastern as my wisdom gets.

This is from the Isle of Islay in Scotland

This is gonna be so sad. They worked together for a long time.

This is perfect.

Thought of it a second ago, had to pop back in.

To be played for this event

To marry me.

To propose to his lady.

To space. (CHUCKLES)

To spell out "Lucy, will you marry me?",

Tom got engaged

Tom, that was amazing!

TOM: I'm really glad you were here to help me

TOM: See that Rolex Submariner on your wrist, bro.

Tom. Action!

Tom. Listen to Ethel.

Tommy "T", we got you everything you asked for. (SCATTING)

Too many endings, not enough beginnings.

Trust me?

Typhoon is an artist and the human head is...

Ugh.

Ugh.

Uh, Leslie's gonna walk in and say something that sounds very boring,

Uh, okay. Well, that was really something.

Uh...

Um, I'll just destroy this office. (APRIL GASPS)

Unsurprisingly, I failed, and you made fun of me,

Until the special election.

Wait a thousand years, thaw it out,

Wait. You know what?

Walter Gunderson and his wife had an open marriage.

Walter Gunderson served Pawnee for 39 years.

Was he killed by a younger, stronger barber?

We all remember how that went.

We even went to a jewelry store and looked at rings.

We have the most rare diamonds in the world.

We know we want to be together forever, so why wait?

We need an interim mayor,

We need something to begin.

We need to find a place in D.C.

We're born, we survive as long as we're useful, and then we're killed,

We're calling this off. It's all wrong

We're headed to the next location.

We're leaving, April and Andy are leaving,

Well, actually, I have an announcement, too.

Well, I committed to the role!

Well, I got to say,

Well, I think we have our answer.

Well, I was a mayor once before.

Well, it's like the ultimate notary adventure.

Well, look at it this way.

Well, no. APRIL: I've already been to space.

Well, someone just officially enrolled

Well, we're probably due for some good news.

Well, you jinxed us, Garry. Thanks a lot.

What a lovely offer, but I think not.

What am I supposed to be, some kind of rock star?

What am I supposed to do with these?

What better place to ask a woman to marry you

What do you like to do for fun?

What happened? Explain yourself.

What is all this?

What is happening?

What on Earth?

What the hell is all this about?

What was that thing we ran for, again?

What with everything ending,

What, mayor? Yeah.

What?

What?

What?

What's happening?

Whenever my hair feels

Which is just a real cool thing

Who cuts your hair? Nobody.

Who knows where I'd be without it.

Who's a good symbolic face for the town.

Whoa! Hey!

Why are you doing an accent?

Why are you like this? Pills, baby! (LAUGHS)

Why can't everyone share our commitment to

Why?

With all this today.

Would you like to see some gorgeous jewelry?

Yeah, 'cause I'm getting ready to go on a big trip.

Yeah, I said we all remember

Yeah, you're right, I should probably keep 'em.

Yeah. I think I'm probably gonna wait.

Yeah. Ooh, uh... What's that?

Yes, I pray that you

Yes, I pray that you do love me too

Yes! Really?

Yes. Oh, my God,

Yes. Yay!

Yes. Yes, of course!

You can't wait to tell someone how you feel.

You could put it behind you, once and for all.

You did. What did you get me? Ooh la la.

You guys are the happy beginning that we all need.

You guys were close?

You in that rude mood?

You knew the risks.

You know that I despise you,

You know, I really would make an incredible mayor.

You know, I've got my hands full with my practice,

You should be mayor.

You should check it out. Seriously

You should propose to her. Right now. Here.

You wanna stay and hide and watch the proposal?

You'd be an amazing mayor.

You'd probably want her here for that, right?

You'll enter from the front.

You'll have the banner done.

You'll see.

You're basically running the town anyway.

You're gonna charge him $8.

You're pretty cool. I'm cool? I'm cool

You're right.

You're the best person for the job and you deserve it.

You've always been there for me,

"Congratulations, Lucy and Tom,"

"Had to"? Had to.

(ALL CHEERING AND APPLAUDING) LESLIE: Oh, my God. Cheers.

(ALL CHEERING)

(ALL GASP)

(ALL GROANING)

(ALL GROANING)

(APRIL SCREAMING)

(BABBLING) (STAMMERING) I...

(BURNER ROARING)

(CELL PHONE CHIMES)

(CHUCKLES) Money, please.

(CLEARS THROAT)

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

(CRYING) Goodnight, you animal.

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

(EXHALES AND CHUCKLES)

(GASPS)

(GROANING)

(GROANING) Ah.

(LAUGHING)

(MONA LISA SQUEALING)

(MUMBLING) Well, all right. If you say so.

(SIGHS)

(SOBBING) It really was.

(WITH A FRENCH ACCENT) 'Allo, would you like to see some rings, Agent Haverford?

(WITH A FRENCH ACCENT) 'Allo.

(WITH NORMAL VOICE) Freeze.

(WITH NORMAL VOICE) I came up with a backstory for my character.