Porky's II: The Next Day (1983) Edit

A couple of days to line up some first class stuff.

A flame.

A forest ranger? In Shakespeare?

A little experiment I got for zoology class.

A little higher, Anthony. Come on.

A mere dalliance, my boy. Affectionately done life experience.

A Midsummer Night's Dream. Act IV, scene I.

A sword!

A sword!

A sword!

A sword!

A sword!

A sword!

A sword! A sword!

A white man's little joke. But their day is coming.

About anybody to make themselves look like studs.

Actually, we had something slightly different in mind.

All he's done is petitioned the school board for a hearing.

All right let's go over it one more time.

All right Mr. Carter.

All right then we take the detour. You ask me why.

All right, folks. Let's get up here, please. Quickly.

All right, go.

All right, let's get ready for the tongue exercise. Ready?

All right, Mr.. Carter!

All right, take it up.

All right, who's supposed to be next?

All right, who's supposed to be next? Let's move it.

All right. That's it.

All right. up! Out! Right! Left! Down!

All tuckered out from playin' hardball Commissioner?

All we need is a brief look at the costume.

Amen! Amen, brother!

And a Mohel is a man who performs a bris or circumcision.

And a Zemel is used by a Mohel to perform the bris.

And at what time is your sister arriving? Or is it your cousin this time?

And because I wanted to.

And believe me there's no question about what's right here. I think this is ridiculous.

And Christ is Lord indeed.

And Christ is Lord indeed.

And damn'd be he that first cries "Hold, enough!"

And damned be he that first cries "Hold, enough!"

And damned be he that first cries "Hold, enough!"

And every time your lips meet mine.

And I guess now I don't.

And I'm the spiritual leader of the Righteous Flock, Reverend Bubba Flavel.

And indeed they have been granted a hearing.

And Jeremiah and Malachi and Matthew and Mark and Luke and John.

And King Lear. Act IV. Scene VI.

And my bowels were moved for him. "

And now for the grand experiment.

And now, friends, as I was say...

And the commission is off the hook because... we tried.

And the God fearin' members of the county commission, who voted unanimously

And they both got shoved up our asses. I knew it.

And this instrument is a Zemel.

And thou opposed, being of no woman born,

And we were heard by the mayor

And we'll see you all again... very soon.

And you.

Anthony, can you get your voice a little higher?

Anthony, that wasn't entirely helpful.

Any friend of yours is a friend of ours.

Anyway, I think it's pretty awful if you don't fix us up with some of your stuff.

Apparently you're not prepared to believe me, but I was working in your best interests.

Approve of it? Are you shittin' me? He gave me this one!

Approve? Heil, Reverend Flavel gave me this one.

April Fool!

Are thou not Romeo, and a Montague?

Are unfit to be performed by our students and too indecent to be viewed by you.

Around, I think you should share with your buddies.

As I was sayin'...

As this heavy ploughman snores, All the weary task for done.

As you know, certain uninformed factions have attempted

As you know, we've got an election coming up in a couple of weeks.

At least we can see this one. We couldn't see the other one.

Aw, shit!

Aw, shit!

Aw, shit! They're all fuckin' Indians.

Aw, shit. Oh, that's a lot of Injuns.

Back to Howard Johnson's.

Barf inspector comin' through! Excuse me. Careful.

Be nice to him. Pretend you understand why he did it.

Beautiful.

Because I'm quite sure it can be resolved perfectlyjustly.

Because most guys are so desperate, they'll lie

Because of the wonderful things he does.

Because, because, because.

Behold, the spawn of Satan.

Ben, what's goin' on?

Big Edna?

Billy, I got a sword.

Blueprints.

Bobby,

Bobby, I am. I'm gonna be...

Bobby, I lost my cherry.

Bobby, I think I'm gonna be... sick.

Bobby! Oh, Bobby!

Bobby.

Bobby. Baby.

Bone, thigh bone to the ankle bone and so on...

Boogie, Boogie, boogie!

Boogie, boogie, boogie!

Boogie, boogie, boogie!

Boogie, boogie, boogie!

Boogie, boogie. boogie!

Boogie!

Boy, it sure tastes better goin' down.

Break a leg!

Bubba Flavel, Mrs. Morris. Reverend Bubba Flavel.

Bubba!

Bubble Flavour?

Bury her.

But I can't tell you what to think.

But I mean really hot. Be convincing, because these guy's will be lookin' for a trap.

But they stopped the play.

But we never dreamed that you'd have such little regard for human life.

But you get her within breathing distance of a cemetery and you better

But, Commissioner, she is only 17 years old.

But, ultimately, the decision isn't ours. It's yours.

But...

By a name I know not how to tell thee who I am:

By the way, we got somethin' cookin' for your Cherry Forever revenge.

Bye bye, Pee Wee. See you later!

Bye, Reverend.

Bye.

Bye.

Call me but love, and I'll be new baptized;

Can put out the fire.

Can we have your autograph?

Charging the Angel Beach High drama club

Come on, Edna. A big girl like you takes a lot of men to keep you satisfied, right?

Come on, folks. Let's get with it, please.

Come on, guys. Let's get serious. This is art here.

Come on, kids! Let's go.

Come on, Mr. Carter.

Come on, shit for brains!

Come on, you guys. What's goin' on?

Commissioner. Commissioner, you're takin' that kid to dinner?

Continuing to practice as a class project.

Cool. Right.

Could be. He's desperate enough. Boys, I think we got his ass in a sling this time.

Country what the Righteous Flock has done to us?

County Commissioner of Seward County and a very big deal.

County Commissioner of Seward County, and a very big deal.

Couple of my fellow commissioners have a rezoning

Dead.

Did Reverend Flavel approve of this one?

Did you get my cherry again?

Didn't you ever brag about some girl you never really made it with?

Dirty, rotten, filthy little creep!

Do I know? You don't think I look after my guy.

Do you really think they're gonna go for it?

Do you recognize any of them?

Do you remember when you had your bris?

Do you think he needs this shit?

Does put the wretch that lies in woe To the remembrance of a shroud.

Does your warrant apply to all plays by the drama club?

Don't be sick.

Don't bug him you guys, he's studying his role.

Don't die till he gets all his clothes off.

Don't go. Wait!

Don't look, Pee Wee. Just don't look!

Don't say 17.

Don't worry about it. I'm takin' her all the way to Miami.

Don'tjust lie there all spread eagled like that. It looks obscene.

Eat my shorts.

Edna, I have some guys that won't let you down. You know what I mean?

Evenin', boys.

Everybody oughta learn to run from big colored guys with machetes.

Everybody wants something. The trick is to see that everybody gets a little piece.

Everybody's a fuckin' comedian.

Everybody's just a little disappointed, right?

Exactly what are you trying to tell us, Reverend Flavel?

Excellent, costumers. Very good. Very creative.

Except I don't wanna give 'em my choice stuff.

Excuse me, girls. Y'all know a good dermatologist?

Excuse me, I am going to be ill.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me. This is a closed rehearsal. We don't open for...

Exposing himself two years ago to his Bible school class and they hushed it up.

Fellow Americans! Fellow Americans...

First we gotta find a broad who they'll believe is ready for a gang bang.

Flavel's got a few votes under his thumb,

Flock, follow!

Flock! Follow.

Flopping around.

For God's sake, we have an election in just over a week.

For I am sent with broom before, To sweep the dust behind the door.

For piss sakes, he's up for reelection in two weeks.

Friend in court? Gee, that has a familiar ring.

Friends, I'd like to tell you that tomorrow night

Friends, it's OK. It's all right. Don't forget tomorrow night.

From victory unto victory.

Front row, center.

Gang bang?

Gar con! What's the matter stupid? Don't you speak French?

Gee, that's very funny, Morris.

Geez Pee Wee, it can't be the first time you've heard that stuff.

Genesis 24:31.

Gentle Romeo, ifthou dost love, pronounce it faithfully.

Get him a sword!

Get it outta here!

Get it outta my face!

Get out of that chair and I'll yell "****. "

Get the curtain.

Get the flock outta here!

Get this: "In his tail. "

Get this. By day, a mild mannered librarian.

Get your own fuckin' snake.

Giddyup! Whoa, what an ass!

Go get her, Pee Wee.

Go on, get out of here!

Go on! That's it!

Go screw your wives! You'll have to wake 'em up and tell 'em what you're doin', though.

Go, go!

God damn you, you...

God, I love this. I just love it.

God, I love this. I just love it.

God, I needed that.

Goddammit, I'm talkin' to you!

Golly, 17!

Good God, Pee Wee, there's a woman lying dead

Good God! It's enough to make a real man sick.

Good Lord.

Good luck in the election. I'll see you at the polls.

Good luck in the elections.

Good night,

Good night, good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow.

Good question. Well, a bris is a circumcision,

Gosh, he's so possessive.

Got a bad rash, Mom.

Graveyard Gloria huh? Why not? Sounds like fun.

Ha! Pee Wee.

Harem and they don't want to make it with a bunch ofjerks.

Have decreed that the works of William Shakespeare, the pearl of English literature,

Have you met the other commissioners? Commissioner Couch. Commissioner Hurley.

He can cite Shakespeare too, Reverend Flavel.

He intends to put his tongue in a woman's tail.

He opened up her womb. "

He's county commissioner of Seward County, for piss sakes.

He's great guy. We got nothin' to worry about.

He's *******. He's our Mohel for the day.

He's not ready for a role that big, yet Meat.

He's pissed as shit and lookin' for Pee Wee everywhere.

He's sort of like a... forest ranger.

He's takin' me to a nice, discreet restaurant down in Miami.

He's the king of the fairies.

Hell, man. That's easy. Wendy Williams.

Hell's a lot hotter than Angel Beach, Mr. Carter. You'll get quite a tan.

Help, Tommy, come here! Hurry!

Help, Tommy!

Henceforth I never will be Romeo.

Here comes the son of a bitch.

Here she comes.

Here we go.

Here's what we'll do.

Hey that's funny. I mean it's not as funny as your face, but it's funny.

Hey waiter!

Hey waiter!

Hey, Billy?

Hey, don't forget your flowers.

Hey, listen. Listen to me. I'm gonna go back to her and...

Hey, mayor! If you had a cape like that, you could give your secretary a flyin' fuck.

Hey, mayori if you get yourself one of those capes

Hey, McCarty.

Hey, Mickey!

Hey, Pee Wee!

Hey, Pee Wee. How's what feel? Getting laid.

Hey, Turner, suck my wand!

Hey, waiter!

Hey, Wendy!

Hey, what are you doin' with my boa? Are you some kind of sickie? Pervert!

Hey, where you goin'? The rally's this way.

Hey, where's my cherry?

Hey, you guys what the hell did Pee Wee do to Stemrick?

Hey, you guys, how they hangin'?

Hey!

Hi, boys.

Hi.

Hi.

His army shall he iead.

His kingdom for a sword!

Hold it! Hold, I say.

Hold on to your dicks, because she'll ride you into the ground!

Hold up, they might miss her down at the library.

Hold your splits, girls. Hold your splits.

Holy shit!

Holy shit!

Holy shit! Look at the dick on that son of a bitch!

Holy shiti Look at the dick on that son of a bitch.

Holy war!

Hose her down, boy! Hose her down.

How good to see you, Monsieur.

How we gonna do that? He's in rehearsal all day.

How's that grab you? Now sit there and take your medicine.

However, my good friends, I assure you:

However, there's absolutely nothing to prevent you on your own

Huh?

Huh?

Hurts like heck.

Hysterical.

I always admired the Bard myself.

I am the principal and I will take care of this.

I can explain it to you. Let me tell you.

I can only tell you the truth.

I can't tell you how great it makes me feel to see you great American kids

I care.

I did it because I liked you

I didn't know anything. I mean...

I didn't know!

I didn't want to, but I didn't care if they did so I watched.

I do what I want. I don't care what anybody thinks.

I don't believe you, what is the matter with you?

I don't know her. isn't this crazy?

I don't know. What do you say? Do you wanna give her a shot?

I don't think I'll ask.

I don't think so.

I don't want 'em talkin' about my girl like that.

I get hot.

I got it all lined up! You wanna act like men for a change and take a shot at this?

I got it all worked out for you all right.

I got laid!

I got laid. I tore her up.

I got used to it.

I gotta talk 'em into goin' for some other guys. I mean, you know they're pretty loyal.

I happen to be the guest of Big Bob Gebhardt,

I hate snakes! You know I hate snakes. Jesus!

I have read Solomon and Job and Isaiah

I heard she was about to take on 20 guys on the way back home from the Daytona trip.

I hope this is better than the last one.

I just got a naturally deep voice. You know.

I just naturally got a man's voice.

I know several thousand voters who don't share your view, Commissioner.

I know they're blueprints. What are they of?

I know what he's trying to accomplish.

I know. I understand.

I mean these guys are pretty inexperienced.

I mean you even gotta convince me. And I've been around.

I mean, after you, where's a girl to go? It's all downhill from here.

I mean, is this guy, like... Is he, like...

I mean, the original mattress back.

I must have a couple ofwords with the students please.

I read My Gun is Quick. Do you know that one?

I really don't give a damn if they get their rezoning but I can't let them know that.

I really wanna hear this story.

I said "retreat," not "surrender. "

I think Hamlet's supposed to win this one.

I think he asked Big John if he could fix us up with his sister for a gang bang.

I think he does.

I think I'm going to regret this.

I think we oughta nail him in his coffin and leave him overnight.

I thought it was funny, you know.

I thought she was supposed to be doing this realistic.

I thought so.

I told you to get out! I tell ya, it's gonna be OK.

I told you. She goes to the bathroom 5:10 every day.

I understand how you feel. Now, please listen.

I wanna feel your arms around me.

I want a drink. Gar con!

I want all you guys but especially you.

I want the school board to cut off funds for this extravaganza immediately.

I want you to come... slowly.

I was afraid you were gonna misunderstand.

I was asking who's the biggest pushover in school. You know what everybody said?

I will sue you! You will not have a pot to piss in!

I will. I'm glad.

I wonder what he meant by that?

I wouldn't worry too much about it.

I'd give her a shot, but it might spoil it for the rest of you.

I'll tell ya later.

I'll withdraw if you think it's best.

I'm 17 today.

I'm crazy for you, you big horse.

I'm doin' different scenes from different plays.

I'm dying for it. But wait.

I'm getting hot and I really mean it.

I'm gonna sue you! Where are my lawyers?

I'm here to lend support to Reverend Flavel.

I'm not gonna let a pack of self righteous bullies deprive you of your play.

If a woman dies while you're boffing her, you're considered an accomplice.

If I'd hung in there, gotten steamrollered. you'd have no friend in court.

If that happened, I'd just have to go into a convent.

If that's not good enough, we'll take it to the the principal's office.

If you'd been have been here on time this wouldn't have happened.

If you're not cherry, you don't get Wendy.

Ifwe have unearned luck So to 'scape the serpent's tongue,

In a spin.

In fact, if I don't get next to a man soon, I'm gonna be in real trouble.

In the eighth grade.

Intolerable! Shakespeare must go!

Is that so?

It looks great, Pee Wee.

It must not suffer loss.

It was so romantic. I was a Brownie in his wife's Girl Scout troop.

It's a character. It's a friend of Oberon's. He's like a... a little forest ranger.

It's all right. I swear it's gonna be OK.

It's Commissioner Gebhardt. He's a friend of Dad's.

It's gonna work, right? Graveyard Gloria, right?

It's just a rat snake. It's not poisonous.

It's just that I've only wanted to three times.

It's like the hip bone connected to the thigh

It's my niece. She does it all the time.

It's not many, but it's enough to scare a couple of my fellow commissioners.

It's not my fault your Mom's a drama teacher.

It's OK. Nothing to worry about.

It's Steve. Steve?

It's the booze, man. It's deadly.

It's the goddamn communist...

It's your little snatchy poo!

Jayne Mansfield.

John Henry, certainly we're not going to be intimidated by this stupidity.

John's always waited for us to get here before he came out to the road. We didn't know.

Just a little rat snake.

Just a moment. Listen.

Just gonna put another notch in my six shooter.

Just kill me, John.

Just pretend Reverend Flavel and the county commissioners aren't out there.

Just pretending? OK.

Just tell those guys you polled all the members of your

Know it? He lives it.

Ladies and gentlemen, one moment, please.

Lay on, Macduff,

Lay on, Macduff.

Leave him alone. It was John's mistake.

Let's ail stand up for Jesus.

Let's hope so.

Let's just do that. Right now.

Let's move it. Folks, may we have your attention please.

Let's talk this over, OK? I tell you what we're gonna do.

Let's you and I go do it before the others get there huh?

Lift high his royal banner.

Like a jerk, my mother thinks I shouldn't mind either.

Line up, boys.

Line up, boys.

Listen Edna, I heard you had a little problem

Listen, about this Shakespeare crap.

Listen, come on! The signal's been delayed. Somethin' important came up.

Listen, I promised to set Turner and some of the guys up with some pussy ya know?

Listen, Pee Wee. Take this over to that lab monitor for me.

Listen, You get a lot of action, just like me.

Little Bobby Gebhardt, where are you?

Long as you keep your cool.

Look at that snatch!

Look at them dirty redskins attacking that poor, defenseless cross.

Look at them tits.

Look closer. That is the world's record shit eatin' grin.

Look Jack, i'il have you know I'm the guest of Big Bobby Gebhardt.

Look man, this is coitus interruptus. In extremis.

Look man. when they've been had by Pee Wee Morris,

Look out!

Look seriously, If you got all this pussy lyin'

Look we couldn't help it. My truck wouldn't start.

Look, Commissioner we understand. It's not the end of the world.

Look, don't worry about it. We'll switch to plan B.

Look, look, I had to make a tactical retreat.

Look, Pee Wee. It really wasn't your fault.

Look, votes don't mean a thing to me if I can't maintain my own integrity.

Look, you guys, when I become a big star and I'm rubbing elbows with Ava Gardner,

Look!

Look. just because you don't mind running around looking

Lookjust think of it as an acting lesson.

Looks after the woods?

Louisville tit? What did he say?

Love.

Lovely! Oh, just wonderful.

Lover, I will be convincing.

Lovers, to bed; 'tis almost fairy time. "

Lovin' that spin I'm in.

Make it mine. Make it mine.

Makes sense to me.

Man, that woman is ugly.

Man, this is ridiculous.

Marilyn Monroe.

Matter of fact, if I'm not mistaken your principal is being notified right now

Maybe I'll get invited to the opening night?

Maybe it doesn't work for a couple of days after you get laid.

Mayor, that guy's dork is bigger than yours.

Mayor, that guy's dork is bigger than yours.

Me neither. I don't think we have it in the library yet.

Me your libel to get caught in the stampede.

Me, an actor? No fuckin' way.

Me, an actor? No fuckin' way.

Michelangelo worked in stone. Van Gogh worked in oil. I work in pussy.

Midsummer Night's Dream. Act V. Scene I.

Morris, the last time you got any action was with your fist. You know, Rosie Palm.

Mr. Carter has a few words. Come on, now.

Mr. Carter, there's a mob here to see you.

Mrs. Balbricker, be silent! I have spoken on this matter.

Mrs. Morris!

My bounty is as boundiess as the sea,

My daughter's so funny. She's just wild.

My ears have not yet drunk...

My God.

My love as deep; the more I give to thee,

My name, dear saint, is hateful to myself, Because it is an enemy to thee.

My tit! You broke my tit!

My warrant applies to all plays by any drama club...

Nah.

Nice tail.

No danger.

No I'm not kidding. Commissioner Mason was caught

No one speaks to me that way. You better get a grip on yourself, boy.

No problem, Coach. I'll let him go outside.

No way.

No, I never read that one, Meat.

No, it can't be. I fired them.

No, no, no. I just meant that... some people might not care for that.

No, no. Tommy's right.

No, not you.

No.

Not a mouse Shall disturb this hallowed house:

Not the pool. No, not the pool.

Now have to deal with the purveyors offilth.

Now hold on a second.

Now if they want my swing vote, they have to help me with your problem.

Now in consideration of your status in the community,

Now the hungry lion roars, And the wolf behowls the moon;

Now what's the plan?

Now you kids go put on a hell of a play.

Now, as I say, we have a warrant here

Now, don't worry about it. It's going to...

Now, there's no mistaking his intention. No, sir.

Now, this Zemel has been used to chop off literally hundreds of foreskins.

Now, you've got my word on this.

Nowhere do I find the likes of this.

Of a lifetime and you act like children. It's embarrassing.

Of course I assure you, we're going to everything we possibly can

Of course there is a heartbeat! Otherwise she'd be...

Of course, we have no need to press this warrant. That was never our intent.

Oh boy, you know I would. Why, whatcha got in mind?

Oh his ass sucks canal water. That's very profound.

Oh Mrs. Morris.

Oh Pee Wee! Oh!

Oh will you cut it out, for Christ's sake! I come here with an offer

Oh, Bobby, don't leave me. I can't have our baby alone.

Oh, Bobby.

Oh, boy.

Oh, Commissioner. Your meeting in five minutes.

Oh, definitely.

Oh, don't worry. Commissioner Gebhardt'll pay for it.

Oh, God.

Oh, I want these guys so horny, they'll do anything for it. Anything.

Oh, it's no pleasure, I assure you, Morris.

Oh, man. The girl's my slave.

Oh, Mrs. Morris.

Oh, Mrs. Morris. I'd like you to meet His Honor Mayor John G. Abernathy.

Oh, my bag. Don't wanna forget my bag.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, no.

Oh, no. We're not givin' in to this stuff.

Oh, Pee Wee, come on. It's just a little joke.

Oh, Pee Wee!

Oh, shit, Steve.

Oh, shit!

Oh, that's not what I hear.

Oh, there's my Shirley Temple.

Oh, well...

Oh, yeah? Then I'll only put half a notch in my gun.

Oh, yeah. Books.

Oh, yes.

Oh, yes. I know, that's the official position of the academic community. However...

Oh, you mean like a really big fairy.

Oh, you snot noses are gonna give us a trim?

Oh. So Pee Wee plays the little fairy and you

OK, come on.

OK, guys, be careful.

OK, guys. What are we gonna do?

OK, here comes your night to remember!

OK, OK. All right.

OK. I'm ready.

OK. So this is the gym. So what?

Old fashioned horse trading.

One last time: Boris Karloff as the Mummy.

One more turn and we'll go.

Only worse.

Ooh that reminds me. I promised Mother I'd stop by

Ooh, Pee Wee!

Or dog oogies?

Or ifthou think'st i be too quickly won, i'll frown and be perverse and say thee nay.

Or Pelican snot?

Over there. And you're telling us it was a joke?

Pee Wee, don't you know why I did that?

Pee Wee, it's not that bad.

Pee Wee, you get out here right now or you're

Pee Wee!

Pee Wee.

Plan B? I don't even know what plan A was.

Play a big fairy. That's a lot of fairies.

Please make it mine.

Please, Madame. At La Fontana Di Voglio, everyone waits.

Please, to the back of the line. Merci, thank you very much.

Probably a barbecue and a bris in your case.

Project on the line, and I'm the swing vote.

Put shitface's drink here on Commissioner Gebhardt's bill.

Quick thinking, Turner. Good job, son.

****!

****!

Really neat disguise.

Really?

Relieved of duty.

Remember the last time we were on this road?

Remember, he who is not with me is against me.

Reverend Flavel's petition to stop the Shakespeare festival.

Reverend, here is the Bible. Now... Now, listen.

Rex, shut up!

Right, I got a role he can study.

Right, so anyway I was wondering if you knew a broad that's a real pushover.

Right.

Right.

Right.

Right.

Right.

Right. Good, but talk about books or something. You know, keep 'em off guard.

Right. Let's go right to the top.

Right. Now she gets hers.

Right. Now the school board's not up for reelection,

Say what?

Say, now. This is gettin' out of hand here, boys.

School board is an independently elected body.

See you don't understand the politics behind this.

See you, Rock.

Set up a meeting with Flavel.

Shakespeare is trash! I'll give proof. Listen to this!

Shakespeare. The... play.

Shakespeare's ass sucks canal water.

Shakespeare's good for you. It'll broaden your mind.

She can't be dead. Let me look.

She didn't see me, she didn't know I was here.

She never stops. She's so quick.

She probably had a bad heart.

She talks in a whisper. Looks like a buttoned up icebox.

She's almost got it. She's almost got it!

She's got it!

She's ruined.

Shit!

Shit!

Shit!

Shit!

Shit.

Shit.

Shit.

Shit.

Shortcut.

Shut up, man.

Sister Balbricker. Open your book. You play the woman's part.

Sit down, Ansell. Sit down.

So Gloria, how come we've never seen you at the library?

So I play hardball.

So sayeth the flock.

So stumblest on my counsel?

So the commission makes Flavel happy by taking the issue to the school board.

So they turn the petition down and you'll be happy.

So what do you think?

So you're playin' a big fairy?

So, Gloria, have you read any good books lately?

So, what's the easy thing to do?

So.

Solomon 7, verse 2.

Some guy you don't know at summer camp.

Some of the fruitcakes in the band didn't know what to do.

Somebody a real idiot could score with.

Song of Solomon. Chapter 5.

Stab him.

Stab!

Stand up, stand up for Jesus.

Stand, I say.

Standing up and fighting for what you think is right.

Step by step... by step.

Steve!

Stop!

Suckers.

Sweet 17 and never been kissed.

Tell Mrs. Morris I'll take the part.

Tell us, Reverend.

Thank you, and what's the phrase?

Thank you, brothers, for that inspirational hymn about Jesus.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. I don't like to have to say this, but I don't want you to be too distressed

Thanks a lot, kid.

Thanks for coming by, Anthony.

That guy's wearing argyle socks. Must be a high budgetjob.

That I shall say good night till it be morrow.

That is great. Great. Nice, nice.

That is what I am doing officially.

That lousy son of a bitch.

That old biack magic has me in its speli.

That old biack magic that you weave so well.

That only your kiss, kiss, kiss.

That sounds like a threat, Reverend Flavel.

That stuff looks like diarrhea.

That would be a grave error.

That young man is not of the American persuasion.

That's good acting when you wanna kill each other, but don't, huh?

That's Hollywood.

That's it. You're not gonna surrender to him.

That's like the old joke "I wouldn't belong"

That's pretty good, huh?

That's right. Hand it over.

That's what she said about you last night.

That's wonderful. Thank you very much.

That's your speed.

The bowels of perdition.

The cemetery to put flowers on Granddad's grave.

The county commissioners are gonna shutdown Shakespeare because they think it's dirty?

The devil can cite scripture for his purpose.

The God fearin' members of the Klan support this action.

The graveyard?

The Klan!

The little booger's up to something sure as shit.

The Lord doesn't have to threaten Mr. Flavel.

The Loyal Order of the Klan will be there!

The mate that fate had me created for.

The minute you hear the word "graveyard"...

The mixin' of ****** and Injun blood must stop.

The more i have...

The next day in school, I was a slut.

The problem is fornication.

The Righteous Flock denounces you. You have no part in this.

The stingy little fucker wouldn't leave no tip.

The wonderful Wizard of Oz.

The worms crawl in.

The worms crawl out.

The worms play pinochle on your snout.

Then let's do that, Miss Balbricker.

There will be a giant rally right here at Angel Beach

There's this girl in the band, Big Edna, is supposed

Therefore the superintendent of schools has ordered me

These guys tried to get me to go skinny dipping.

These innocent children aren't to blame.

These learned people, the Righteous Flock, in their infinite wisdom,

They ain't happy. These Injuns ain't happy.

They don't like John Henry playing Romeo to Wendy's Juliet.

They gonna mess their trousers!

They haven't been getting much lately.

They influenced the county commission to address the school board,

They made me do it. They said they'd never let me see you again.

They tried to shave his head.

This director must be the Cecil B De Mille of pussy film.

This is exhausting!

This is gonna scare the shit out of 'em.

This is ridiculous!

This is Shakespeare. It is not filth.

This is the most disgusting display I have ever seen.

This is the way it's gonna work. I've got it all mapped out.

This isn't gonna work.

This means war.