The Adventures of Bob & Doug McKenzie Strange Brew (1983) Edit

A six pack.

After I chased the van, eh, he took me back to his

All I've got is two fives.

All right, don't touch anything. I'll be right back.

All right, let's not get excited.

All right, single file. Down here. Step it up. Move it.

All right, single file. Down here. Step it up. Move it.

All right!

All right. You better follow us there.

All these names that are going by, these guys worked on the movie, eh.

Alpha Base, this is Bob McKenzie.

And all the moths will fly up to the projection booth window, cloud it up...

And he said, come here and get free beer or he'll press charges.

And I will not underestimate our little friends again.

And Litzenberger and Salming are

And my brother and I, uh, we have a lot of parking tickets.

And not guilty to all other charges due to mental incompetence.

And spit, 'cause there's acid in it, eh?

And that's a moving violation.

And the lights don't work.

And then

And then we'll try and find Henry Green, okay?

And then, like, release them at a point in the movie

And they live, like, up in the rafters, eh.

And this, sir, is the same tape that your engineer retrieved

And we heard, like, when that happens that you get your beer free.

And you don't see them all day. Then they go out.

And, like, put it in a bottle...

Are you sure you don't want to think this over?

At least figure skaters know how to skate, eh?

At least I don't have a voice like Jiminy Cricket.

At the Royal Canadian Institute for the Mentally Insane.

At the Royal Canadian Institute for the Mentally Insane.

Aw, nice going, you knob.

Back off. Let's have a look here.

Be careful.

Beauty, eh?

Beauty.

Beauty.

Beauty. Hank Aaron. Wonder if he can hit.

Beauty. It's like leaving a ballgame early, eh.

Beauty. Okay.

Because I need you!

Because it goes right up here. That's the off ramp.

Because otherwise you'll get lost, and she'll be disappointed.

Become addicted to Elsinore beer.

Before he could warn other mutants in the underground caves.

Being on the same team as you is all the padding I need, Rosie.

Better go to your goals.

Bingo. Lunch break.

Boy, that was some belch!

But he's not really dead. I just told him that when you fainted.

But I already had the gum, eh? Sign it, To Bob McKenzie, my good pal.

But I came here to talk about my plans for the brewery.

But I've never seen this stuff before.

But look, we got What's that over there?

But of course it's not true. I'm just an employee.

But there is a daughter.

But we can't show it, eh, 'cause it's wrecked.

But you don't know how to run a brewery. Who'll handle the day to day operations?

But, all in all, it was a good $5's worth for me and my whole family.

But, believe me, that mental incompetence bit

But, oh, no, you had to do it your way. You think you know everything, eh?

But, unfortunately, we find the mail system unreliable here

By sleeping in and being late for our first day at work, eh?

Can I buy you a beer?

Can I get everyone's attention, please?

Can you believe this?

Careful.

Cheers.

Chimp here does the killing. I don't like to kill.

Chimp here would probably just kill him anyway.

Come back and fight, you hosers. Come on, eh?

Come on, Doug! They're in the vat room. Let's go!

Come on!

Come on!

Come on. Give me one.

Come on. I'll show you.

Come on. Let's go.

Come on. Mom! Dad!

Confined under the psychiatric care

Could be, sir.

Courtesy from our good friends at Elsinore Brewery.

Cover your shorts. Don't get deep.

Damn distortion. What is it? That's twice.

Delvecchio's hurt Gretzky. They're in the dressing room,

Did you see it? It was a beauty.

Didn't blow. Anybody home?

Do as I say.

Do it.

Do you have a credit card?

Do you hear that, honey? They got jobs.

Do you know who that is?

Do you mind? You're a little crowded here.

Do you want me to light it up?

Do you want to be relieved of the burden of ownership?

Doctor B.M. Smith, Resident Head of Psychiatry

Doctor, thank God you're here!

Don't be a hog. We just have time for one quick one.

Don't forget to make a right at Highway 6, eh.

Don't get out of the car or you'll get electrocuted.

Don't make me laugh, eh?

Don't make me laugh, eh?

Don't tell them the film, eh? You're supposed to show it.

Don't understand how you feel about losing your father.

Don't wreck our show, you hoser.

Don't you think it's a little unusual to get married so soon after the funeral?

Down there ten minutes? Nobody can last that long.

Dr. Smith, would you say that you are sufficiently familiar

Dude, what happened? Film broke.

Elsinore beer, will go right over there.

Essentially, this is a vote of trust.

Excuse me.

Exhibit A. It's an open and shut case.

Feet together. Come on, straighten up. Look straight ahead.

Figures you wouldn't know if it's got a computer.

Finding out what's to be done.

First come, first served.

First thing in the morning.

Fleshy headed mutant, are you friendly?

Follow the van?

Follow them.

Forget it. Dr. Smith is doing the lobotomy in the morning.

Frank Mahovlich's one of the strongest guys in the league.

Fresh as a daisy. Hey, can I play?

From now on they're working full time at the brewery for me and Rosie.

From the television cameras that monitor the activity in your brewery?

Get a baby mouse,

Get his bowl quick, or he'll kill us.

Get in.

Get off.

Get out of the way! Get out of the way!

Get out of the way! Get out of the way!

Get the man out of the bed!

Get Wild Kingdom here, eh? Come on. He's getting mad.

Give in to the dark side of the Force, you knob.

Give me 12 fresh Yukon Gold, please.

Give me a toasted back bacon, hold the toast.

Give me a toasted back bacon, hold the toast.

Give me magnification on the code pad.

Give me something quick. A couple of bullets.

Give me the church key. Beauty.

Give them enough time just to see, okay.

Go.

Good day, eh?

Good day. We got here too early, eh? We were just waiting.

Good day. Welcome to the end of the movie, eh.

Good morning, Elsinore Brewery.

Good morning, Miss Elsinore. I'm Brewmeister Smith.

Good work.

Good.

Good. Now, bring the lunatics from the institute.

Got to fix it, eh? Sorry, film

Guess the whole world's made in Japan.

Guys that wear tools on their belts.

Happy trails. See you.

Have a good game, eh?

He knows you're lying about the mouse.

He likes jelly.

He made out okay. What a fight.

He once got our dead battery going by mixing birds' feces

He saw Jedi 17 times, eh? Beauty.

He was already dead when I killed him.

He was wearing pajamas. He stole my coat and hit me.

He'll arrest you. I'll be a witness.

He's a genius, eh? He knows the atlas. Okay, and over here we have

He's going to blast off in a minute. You ever seen him do that?

He's going to take a leak. Get out of the way!

He's guarding the beer. What are we gonna do?

He's lying, all right.

He's not dead. Look, his stomach's moving.

He's starting to sound like the old man. Pretty soon he'll send me out for beers.

He's the one with the bleeding nose. I didn't do nothing.

Help!

Help! Stop that man! Stop him!

Henry ran it for my father. He can run it for me.

Henry, could this have happened?

Henry, I want to talk to you.

Her tires are insulators.

Here goes another one.

Here we go, eh?

Here, boy.

Here, put these on. Safety requirements.

Here.

Here.

Here. Come on.

Here's a map, and you must follow this route precisely

Here's what happened in the film, eh? After I was chased Take off.

Hey, beauty.

Hey, check this out. There's sandwiches and smokes in these machines, eh?

Hey, did you ever notice that in movies

Hey, get away from there! Don't touch those things!

Hey, get me out of here, will you? I got a wiz to throw!

Hey, give me some quarters. I'm gonna have chocolate milk.

Hey, here's a chocolate.

Hey, Hosehead. Here's another one for your collection, eh?

Hey, Hoser, go.

Hey, look! They're giving refunds in the alley.

Hey, look. Bootlegs.

Hey, Pam.

Hey, Rosie, will you sign a hockey card? I brought it from home.

Hey, Rosie. We're going to Pam's birthday. You coming?

Hey, some guy called for you while you was out, eh?

Hey, that was a great hat trick you got against Czechoslovakia, eh?

Hey, this piano's got a computer, eh?

Hey, you did a fine job, son.

Hey, you guys, follow him.

Hey, you! $6.50!

Hey, you! Let me see your ticket! $6.50!

Hey!

Hey! They did this on their album. Rip off.

Hey.

Hey.

Hi, fellows. My name's Ted, and I'm happy to be working with you.

His brother Claude married his wife and took over the entire brewery.

Holy jeez!

Holy jeez! There's a guy over there.

Holy jeez. Jackpot.

Holy shit!

Honey, phone the neighbors.

Hoser, this is four months old.

How 'bout all those people who left early, eh, when the movie was ending, eh?

How are the brakes?

How come you're not playing hockey, eh?

How convenient!

How did you do that?

How do we get him out?

How ironic! You came here with a mouse in a bottle.

How's it going, Mr. Hawkland? I remember you from the office, eh?

Hurry up! Come on, let's go! I saw that!

Hurry.

Hurry.

I am your father, Luke.

I am. I would say, without a doubt, that they suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

I appreciate your sympathy,

I believe there'll be no charge on this two four of beer, thank you.

I can't believe it. He drank it all! Help me out.

I can't go through with that again. There'll be police, questions.

I could crush your head like a nut.

I could live in the van, eh? I don't need a place to sleep.

I did not say they were lawyers. You said they were lawyers.

I didn't know they were in there.

I didn't notice anything.

I directed, too, eh?

I don't know how to work it, eh?

I don't know what's wrong with her. She hasn't said a word since the accident.

I don't know you. I'm just a hitchhiker, eh?

I don't know, eh, but we may as well really wreck this movie now.

I don't know. It gets better, eh?

I don't know. We need an explosives expert.

I don't like it at all.

I don't need no machine to tell me that, eh?

I don't plan on doing it alone.

I gave them a map. It was all very clear.

I got that guy's hockey card at home. I'll show it to you.

I got your license number. You rich bum! $6.50.

I guess we're married, clerk.

I have a photographic memory, you know?

I have a plan.

I have to go along with this.

I hope she'll be able to testify tomorrow morning.

I hope you're proud of yourselves.

I just don't want to step on Smith's toes.

I knew this would happen. Don't let them in.

I know it! He's going to kill us! I didn't do it! It wasn't me!

I know. Sorry about your sweater. You can take it out of my pay if you want.

I landed my vehicle to pursue and destroy this genetic freak

I mean, we had a deal.

I must instruct you not to speak unless you are spoken to.

I never knew what grips were, eh. You know what they are, eh?

I see. Well,

I should never have listened to you!

I think he's bummed out.

I think I'd better go.

I think it's getting warmer in here.

I thought you said you have a photographic memory.

I told you.

I want these two lunatics

I want to see how the drug in the beer is affecting them.

I want you hosers to get me a fresh case of beer

I was drinking during the beer because I had such

I was kind of like a one man force, eh? Like Charlton Heston in Omega Man.

I was the only one left on the planet after the holocaust, eh?

I win, eh?

I would have saved you some, but I had to save everyone's life, eh.

I wouldn't go in there. There's a big skunk in there.

I'll call an ambulance.

I'll drive.

I'll help all I can. Excuse me.

I'll reconnect this.

I'll take care of them.

I'll try the whole thing out tomorrow.

I'm afraid that's private company business.

I'm afraid you have two weeks notice, Mr. Smith.

I'm going to the brewery.

I'm having a heart attack.

I'm in charge here!

I'm letting go of the beer.

I'm sorry, he doesn't work here anymore. Thank you.

I'm taking you to the loony bin.

I'm the brains, eh?

I'm the president of the company. I'll just hire you back. She has no

I've spotted a fleshy headed mutant in Sector 16B.

If I didn't have puke breath, I'd kiss you.

If it had been me who died, you'd be over it by now.

If you'd stick to your 12 point maintenance program, eh,

If you're innocent then you have nothing to fear.

If you're sucking me in I knew you would.

In a few hours I will introduce my special formula

In case she sues for whiplash,

In other words, you're buying her out.

Is she here?

It can wear off in time like it did with me, eh.

It even has a time code on it, and those are very difficult to fake.

It isn't my business anymore. I won't listen to you

It looks that way.

It takes experience to run a brewery. You have none.

It was no dream. It was in your underwear.

It was some sculptor, I think. I'm terrible on names.

It was where they were running off them pirates, eh?

It wasn't me! I didn't do it! Turn this thing off!

It's a 10 speed. A five speed times two.

It's a business trip. They're going on a business trip.

It's a jelly.

It's all right. It did that before.

It's beauty. I'll put it on my mantel and, um,

It's easy to wallow in self pity. The hard thing is to go on living.

It's faster.

It's great to do a movie and get to learn

It's him! It's my brother! Oh, no, John! He wants revenge!

It's in the Canadian Criminal Code, eh?

It's nice to get away from the brewery once in a while.

It's not a poison. It's, uh, more like a drug.

It's okay, don't worry. Trust me. Come here.

It's only $15. Take it. It's yours.

It's pointless to worry.

It's really too bad you won't be around to see the whole world

It's really your brewery now, isn't it?

It's right at the bottom of the big hill.

It's the guys.

Jean LaRose, the hockey player?

Jeez, here's the organ they were using, eh?

Jeez, I just got up, eh? I don't know.

Jeez, I told you we brought too many doughnuts, eh? This is spooky in here.

Jeez, I'm sure glad we got rid of them. They were really starting to bug me, eh?

Jeez, there's a lot of arrows, eh? Elsinore Castle. Elsinore Brewery.

Jeez, these got beer in them, these big kegs?

Jeez, those things hurt.

Jeez, who'd want to hork our clothes, eh?

Jeez, you better check this thing. Look, the plug's glowing.

Jeez! What should we do, eh?

Jeez. The guy hung up. Okay!

Just exactly what is wrong with the beer, eh?

Just getting your beer.

Just let me out, please.

Just one more test, and then we are ready for the world.

Just show it like this, eh? Just hold it up.

Just testing the brakes, eh? They felt a little soft.

Just think of all the free beers we're going to get. Come on.

Keep quiet.

Lawyers are for sucks.

Lawyers.

Let me alone! Wait! You can't do this to me!

Let me see what you've got.

Let me see.

Let's get bombed.

Let's get out of here.

Let's move it.

Let's run it all again.

Let's try to cut him out with a blow torch.

Like he went to get a pizza.

Like there's legal precedent set in cases in law.

Like, normally, we just have Great White North, eh?

Like, perhaps it would be, uh, a good idea for us

Like, Russia blew up the U.S., and the U.S. blew up Russia, eh?

Like, uh, this guy here. He was beauty.

Listen, about that shooting business.

Look at this.

Look at this. Every camera on the place is tied into this console.

Look out, eh?

Look.

Looks like LaRose picked up those two hicks.

Lucky for me, I'd been off planet on vacation at the time of the war, eh?

Make sure the trucks leave for Oktoberfest as planned.

May I remind you two idiots that this is a court of law?

Maybe a couple of these guys got sick and tired of wearing their pajamas, eh?

Maybe he's a doctor. And one guy stole the car from over there.

Maybe he's gonna puke. He had too many beers.

Maybe he's just sleeping, eh?

Maybe it's out of gas, eh?

Maybe we ought to call Marlin Perkins, eh?

Maybe we should call the Red Cross or something.

McKenzie brothers. Your lawyer's here.

Mind you, he ate a lot at mealtime, eh. He was always late.

Mom? Dad?

Montreal Canadien Rookie of the Year two years ago.

More bean medley, dear?

Mr. Hawkland, can we just get one quick shot of you?

Mr. Hawkland.

My brother and I used to say that drowning in beer was like heaven, eh?

My brother can tell the difference between beers by what his burps taste like.

My brother's coming in now, so, all cops, come on up here now.

My brother's got a bleeding

My brother's got a bleeding nose. We need some Kleenex.

My coat, too.

My compliments on the many fine things you have in your home.

My condolences to you on the loss of your father.

My daughter, you know, Pamela,

My father must have found out about that.

My left nut.

My mother might have accepted your proposals, but I don't.

My name is gone.

Never mind. I'll do it myself.

Nice going.

Nice try.

No way, eh?

No way! My turn! I want to

No way! My turn! I want to

No way.

No way. That's an EP from some British New Wave band.

No wonder everything's secret here.

No, don't blow him up! He's my brother. Please don't hurt him!

No, fellows. No exercises today.

No, he wouldn't, he'd love to,

No, I don't know where he is. This is the one. He's dead.

No, I don't want it! $6.50! Hey!

No, look, can we talk this over, fellows?

No, never. We always stick together.

No, no! You're always touching things!

No, thanks. It's okay. I can find my way myself.

No, that's exactly what the doctor told us.

No, wait, fellows!

No, you open the door.

No.

No.

No. Hey, let's go see if there's a lost and found, eh?

No. Right there's the off ramp.

Nobody's buying anybody out, Henry.

Not Houdini, not nobody.

Not that way. We'll get killed. This way.

Not the one who died, eh, of the brewery.

Not your job? Do you want him to mummify?

Now don't get scared.

Now get out of here before I put the two of you in a bottle.

Now he's not here, and I got two soakers.

Now hurry up!

Now what about that missing disc?

Now what?

Now you are the mouse.

Now, Dr. Smith, we know you are familiar with this case.

Now, go to the loading dock.

Now, I think he just pressed one of these buttons here.

Objection. You cannot split pleas like that.

Of Dr. Smith

Oh, boy.

Oh, good.

Oh, I know some stuff about electricity, eh?

Oh, I'm getting whiplash from my burps, eh?

Oh, I'm sorry. Mr. Elsinore passed away recently.

Oh, jeez, but we have to come back for my turn, eh?

Oh, jeez, look at this place.

Oh, jeez!

Oh, jeez.

Oh, jeez.

Oh, just to make sure. That's a great idea.

Oh, look, everything's under control. Don't worry, I took care of it.

Oh, my God! Why don't you fry

Oh, no! Geez, I have to take a leak so bad I can taste it.

Oh, sorry, eh.

Oh, uh, we're from the Department of Justice, and we're adjusting the beds.

Oh, well, I'm very flattered that you think I'm that important.

Oh, well, normally I would, but

Oh, wouldn't you like a drink or something?

Oh, wow.

Oh, yes. And I'd like to point out

Oh!

Oh! Not there.

Oh. We was thinking since we're employees of the brewery now, eh,

Okay, another thing. Um...

Okay, basically it's the same system with a new addition.

Okay, eh, all cops, eh, get out of your cars.

Okay, eh?

Okay, first off, the difference between movies and TV, eh?

Okay, freeze the frame.

Okay, I got an idea, but we got to go home first, okay?

Okay, I'd like to thank The Academy for this beer, eh.

Okay, like, England and Ireland and France, eh?

Okay, so we made a movie, eh? So we're going to show that now.

Okay, so we made a movie.

Okay, take it easy.

Okay, that's it. That's enough.

Okay, then, 10 years after World War Four.

Okay, this is like an aerial view. Okay, take the 401.

Okay, watch this.

Okay, zoom in on me, the director. Come on.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. Come along now. You can't leave this mess here,

Okay. Go to TV.

Okay. Good day. I'm Bob McKenzie. This is my brother Doug.

Okay. Here's my theory on movies. You want to know how to wreck a movie, eh?

Okay. I want to take a head count, uh, like maybe we'll have some breakfast, eh.

Okay. Movie review. Okay. I thought it was beauty.

Okay. See you.

Okay. Thanks.

Okay. There we go. I'm going to take it up to 90 this time.

Okay. You know his replacement, eh, like, the new boss?

On a record player that's, like, on its side, eh?

On fire? Geez! Hey, can you hold on for a minute?

One guy just drove away with the car from here and he gave me this.

Open the door. Come ahead, boys.

Or by generalized inhibition.

Or by generalized inhibition.

Or gaffers?

Order! Order!

Out of the way. Come on.

Ow!

Ow! Take off, you hoser.

Pam?

Perhaps one of these would refresh your memory, eh?

Plugs don't work.

Proceed, Counselor.

Pulford and Holman have been fighting terribly.

Pursue him!

Put Rosie the Rose. I know you like being called Rosie, eh?

Put them in the game. Take it to level five.

Put these clothes on. I'll tell you about it on the way.

Put this in your mouth so you don't bite your tongue off.

Quick, get a glass. Beauty.

Radiation has made me an enemy of civilization.

Really?

Remember where we got this?

Remember, that was our deal. I

Right.

Roadblock. Go that way.

Royal Canadian Institute for the Mentally Insane.

See you, eh?

See you.

Send those lunatics back to the institute.

Send those lunatics back to the institute.

She has the right. She has 51 percent. That's all the right she needs.

She just turned 21 and legally inherits the whole brewery.

She told you we were innocent.

She's having her birthday, and I want to deliver a couple of kegs.

Shut up!

Shut up.

Skunk!

So I spent most of my time looking for beer.

So I'll show you the way to the cafeteria

So let's get some men on the bottling line.

So security is extremely important.

So she can continue with her studies.

So she's the new boss?

So sit back, get some corn, and let's have It's movie time.

So we just go down to Lakeside Park here, eh?

So we use private couriers.

So, do you travel quite a bit?

So, object A will attack object B, or black will attack white, or vice versa.

Some back bacon sandwiches while we're waiting.

Somebody help us, please!

Somebody horked our clothes.

Sorry about that nervous breakdown you had.

Sorry I ralphed, Pam.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Sounds like you just picked that out of the dictionary.

Specific tones...

Stand back. This is really going to blow.

Start up. Come on, eh? Start up.

Stay where you are, or I'll kill you.

Steamroller!

Stick on the ice.

Suppose she sees something?

Sure, go ahead. Ow! This thing's hot.

Take a jar of moths into the theater, eh, and, like

Take a little drive, you know?

Take a look at this. Dad really got into the beers, eh?

Take off!

Take off! No way!

Take off! We are not going to crash, eh!

Take off. He's signing my card.

Take off. I am not. Just getting warmed up for the party, eh?

Take off. I'm going to do the steamroller.

Take off. That's Dad's beer money, eh?

Take off. You don't know.

Take one, then that's it for you.

Take the 401 to Kitchener here, and then take Highway 6 north.

Take this. We've got work to do.

Ted just said she had lawyers with her. I thought we should discuss it.

Ted.

Thank you.

Thanks.

That horse ran like a bum yesterday. See you tomorrow.

That is correct.

That is schizophrenia marked by excessive and sometimes violent motor activity

That this tape has not been tampered with or edited in any way.

That was no goal, you know. They were in the crease.

That's because they're being towed, eh?

That's how you handle the press. Come on.

That's impossible.

That's it. Okay.

That's it. We're leaving, kids. Come on.

That's not our code. Get me the John Elsinore disc.

That's the tape they showed at the inquest.

That's them. Get them!

That's what a gaffer does.

That's, uh, some dog of yours, too. He's really hungry, isn't he?

The brakes aren't working.

The circuits are fusing.

The Colonel's dead. Here we are still enjoying his chicken.

The computers, the surveillance system, everything seems to be overloading.

The Earth had been, like, devastated by nuclear war.

The end of the human era.

The offense of kidnapping is comprised of two elements.

The old man'll boot us out, and we'll have no place to sleep.

The power of the Force stopped you, you hosers.

The power's on in the old cafeteria.

The rise of the machine and the fall of man.

The roof just blew off the institute. It's on fire.

The second time. You murdered him first.

The two of you have been charged with kidnapping

The wharf. The end of the wharf.

Then I'm taking you to the loony bin.

Then we wouldn't have to jump start you like this.

There they are.

There wasn't much to do. All the bowling alleys had been wrecked.

There. You see that? You see that number? April 4.

There's 11, 12, 13.

There's a door here. It's locked.

There's a guy back there trapped in a vat.

There's a lot of cops around.

There's a power surge at the main gate.

There's no scientific explanation for it.

There's no way I'll crash this. This is a beer truck, eh.

There's one less to worry about then. Now come this way.

There's probably beer here somewhere.

There's the game we were in. Hey, what's with this guy, eh?

There's those guys who horked our clothes.

These cops are going to arrest us.

These gentlemen here say they have a meeting with you, eh?

These hosers are skating around in a circle.

They come early in the morning and go up there,

They don't even trust themselves.

They don't look like lawyers to me.

They got free beer.

They got their cars out now and you got to see this, eh.

They got two stops, then no brakes.

They killed him.

They put some stuff in the beer. And they make us drink it every day.

They thought they were going to get out, instead they missed all this great stuff.

They took the one disc that would incriminate me.

They were here when I got here.

They're already in.

They're cutting pirates.

They're down at the end of the wharf, sir.

They're going to be loving you from dawn until dusk.

They're going to be loving you from dawn until dusk.

They're responding to the sounds. Watch this.

They're sort of like a different breed, eh.

This is a temporary arrangement, to relieve her of the burden of ownership

This is just the thing, a hypodermic needle.

This is the difference between TV and movies, eh?

This movie was shot in 3 B, three beers, and it looks good, eh?

This plan sucks. I ain't going in.

This sort of thing didn't happen.

This was free beer, Dad. There's more outside.

Those big cons are going to love you, eh?

To build a city for my children,

To take, like, all the contaminated beer back to the brewery

To the public at Oktoberfest.

Try and use as little oxygen as possible, and maybe when the level rises,

Try to pick out the men who kidnapped you.

Turn!

Twenty cans ought to be enough, eh?

Two bowls of split plea soup to go, eh?

Two trucks full of bad beer went there this morning.

Under Section 2471 of the Criminal Code.

Until the victim is mentally fit for trial,

Use the money I gave you today, you idiot.

Very good, my dear. Cunning, right to the end.

Very special kegs, for the party.

Wait, look.

Wait, look.

Wait! I want to go to the cafeteria.

Wait. First they got to You got to interview me, the director.

Was that a dream?

Watch them for mice.

Way to go. You gave away the money.

We are not going to kill anybody.

We are very happy to announce that today all the beer is free.

We can get up to that porthole.

We couldn't feed him, eh, because we was in jail.

We found this mouse in a bottle of Elsinore beer...

We got jobs at Elsinore Brewery. We work there now, eh?

We got over $5 billion in our hideout.

We have an appointment with that guy there, eh?

We have to follow the van.

We have to follow the van. Go back.

We have to follow the van. Go back.

We have to stop the people drinking it.

We know that. It's a Toronto skunk. My jurisdiction.

We know. We're moving. My brother's drunk.

We lost him.

We lost picture, but we have it back.

We made Zoom back in, eh?

We made the appointment with him, eh? What's his name again?

We made the appointment with the deceased quite some time ago, eh?

We take them to the loading dock and put them in beer kegs.

We thought you were going to take a leak.

We told them we didn't want a lawyer.

We want our lungs to be pink when they fry us.

We was wondering, eh, like, uh,

We were at a party, and a friend of ours, a cop, had some and he puked.

We were away on business.

We will move towards Oktoberfest as planned,

We'll always have our memories.

We'll show them how big the screen is, eh? Zoom out. Go.

We're going to a party. Don't eat the furniture.

We're going to crash. We'll be in the water again.

We're in his good books now, eh?

We're just waiting.

We're real sorry. Here's some money back, eh?

Welcome to 1984, the age of automation and unemployment.

Well, boys, it worked.

Well, feel free to call upon me at any time.

Well, I don't know.

Well, I thought there were a couple of, uh, minor, uh, story flaws,

Well, if there's no staff, there's no reason to have a cafeteria.

Well, maybe we ought to go home and feed him, eh?

Well, not so long ago when there were men on the bottling lines,

Well, the day after he died

Well, the Inspector has to leave.

Well, then how about a couple of passes to a real movie?

Well, we found this mouse in a bottle of your beer, eh?

Well, who employed you to install surveillance cameras?

Well, yours are like referee skates.

Well?

What a waste of money.

What all the stuff means, eh, like grip, eh.

What are we going to do now?

What are you doing in here?

What are you doing walking around? I thought you were sick.

What are you doing?

What are you looking at me for? I don't got it.

What did you give him?

What do you mean? Just get me out of here, eh?

What do you think?

What happened?

What have you done with the disc?

What is it you want?

What is it?

What made this brewery great is that my father ran it as a family business.

What the hell was that?

What the hell's going on in there?

What the stink are they doing in there?

What took you two minutes would have taken us two hours.

What was that?

What?

What? Two minutes is up?

What? We can't hear you. We got these things in our ears, eh?

What? We're having a meeting.

What's going on? Didn't we pay our electric bill?

What's going on? Will you stop this thing?

What's going to happen if this plan don't work, eh?

When did you do that?

When I spotted a mutant in the forbidden zone.

When they drink enough they'll do whatever I tell them.

When they're driving, they don't look at the road for a long time?

When you get there, you can have all the free beer and sausages you can eat.

When you heard the whistle blow, they ride off, ride off.

When you know what happens, eh?

When you, Robert and Douglas McKenzie, did kidnap one Pamela Elsinore.

Where are all these hosers going, eh?

Where are they?

Where did you boys get all this beer?

Where it can be properly disposed of, eh?

Where should we go? Loony bin or brewery?

Where's Henry Green? Weren't you supposed to meet him here?

Where's the puck?

Who are you?

Who chiseled this?

Who is this?

Who?

Who? Oh, yes, we hope so.

Will be, ahem, tough to beat.

With the defendants to give us a preliminary diagnosis?

With this honorarium and the temporary share transfer agreement.

Worked! I can't thank you enough. I really can't.

Would you kindly explain to the court what that means?

Would you like me to tilt your chair back?

Yeah, beauty.

Yeah, he's always hungry, eh.

Yeah, he's got a funny look in his eye, eh?

Yeah, okay. But hurry, will you, I got to go.

Yeah, right here.

Yeah, they bootleg those, eh?

Yeah, we'll work real hard.

Yeah, well, I have to give them my theory on movies, eh?

Yeah, well, let's not blow it

Yeah, well, yours are sucky white skates like a figure skater, eh?

Yeah, well. Gee, I don't know how to do this.

Yeah.

Yeah. Help me get him out of here. I've got an idea.

Yeah. Okay?

Yes, we have an appointment with the president, the new president,

Yes, well,

Yes.

Yes. It's right at the bottom of the hill. You can't miss it.

Yes. She's not alone. She's got two guys with her.

You all right?

You all went through the Stop sign over there.

You are, too, or I'll tell the old man you gave away his money.

You can't drink and drive at the same time, hoser.

You certainly don't need any of this kind of hardware to make beer.

You couldn't cut that with a torch.

You don't know what I'm talking about.

You ever see at the end of movies, uh, when they, like, freeze frame?

You ever see in the movies cowboys ride off into the sunset?

You go with her. You come with me.

You got it, eh.

You got it.

You got to level six, I only got to level five. Beauty playing.

You had a nervous breakdown, eh? Me, too, when he was born.

You hoser.

You know how to handle one of those big rigs?

You know, Pamela, I don't want you to think that your mother and I

You know, Pamela, I don't want you to think that your mother and I

You know, people can tell what's in beer, eh?

You mean you've never been apart?

You must be out of your mind, young lady.

You need money to live or you'll starve.

You saved my life.

You see, the brewery business has become very competitive these days.

You shouldn't have had that chocolate milk.

You stole it, didn't you?

You stupid idiot. Now he'll be asleep for two hours.

You take the beer and

You'd better call an ambulance.

You'd better get started or you'll be late.

You're asking me to do all sorts of crazy things.

You're doing a great job for me here, but I have a special assignment for you.

You're going to conduct those experiments with her walking through the brewery?

You're not going to get it back.

You're right. Well, what are we going to do?

You're very observant. I'll make this as simple as possible.

You've got to help him. You've got to get him out of there.

Your brother is dead.

Your job is to watch the bottles on this line.

Your Worship, I wish to plead my clients guilty to statutes

Zoom in on me.

Zoom in on this, eh? Zoom in.

Zoom in on this. Okay, here's how to get free beer, eh?

...and England, welcome to our movie. How's it going, comrades?

'Morning, George. How are you, Paddy?

$6.50. Here. This ought to be worth $6.50.

2051, the future. They saw it already.

2051. No. More. What? No.

A call for me? Yeah.

All right now. Come on. Careful now.

All right, come on. Down the hall. All right, don't be a bully, eh?

And I think Ted is dead. Ted?

And you know what to do? Yes, yes, I know.

Are you crazy? Shut up.

Are you done yet? Yeah.

Are you sure we didn't kill them? Just shut up. I have this all worked out.

As for you, my dear Don't worry about me, Smith.

Back to the institute! Do as I say. Hurry.

Beauty! Come on! You're lying.

Beauty. Cheers.

Beauty. Come on.

Beauty. Hey, let's try the head this time.

Beauty. We'll get off, eh?

Beer shower. Don't waste it.

Bonaparte. Uh, Napoleon, actually.

Bribe him. Give him a doughnut.

but he has to run. Oh.

But I saw you drown. They saved my life.

Clerk, please. Clerk is gonna give you some Kleenex.

Come on, eh, you hoser. I'll get you out.

Come on, let's go. Yeah, okay.

Come on. You guys, go with them.

Come on. Get back there. That's her. She was

Come on. We're lost. Shh.

Cops! Clear out, clear out.

Cops! This is the police.

Dad, Bob broke your beer. No, I didn't. Doug broke it.

Darling? Ah, my wife.

Did her mother sign it? Yes, she did.

Did you feed Hosehead this morning? No. I forgot. He was sleeping, eh?

Don't worry, I will. Come on!

During the movie, I mean. He's loaded, eh. He's gone.

Easy. Come on, get the rope off her.

Elsinore. Twelve.

Excuse me? Okay.

Forget it, hoser, the power's turned off. Come on, guys, let's go.

Geez, a ten speed! Yeah, sure, of course.

Get away from there! Pam is in there. Ow!

Get away! Pam's in there.

Get it over there. Okay. Beauty.

Get it? Hoserama. Call it Hoserama.

Get me out of here. Hold it, hold it.

Get up. Jeez, you hoser. Take off.

Give it to me. I need it. He needs the credit card, eh?

Go, eh? It's my last one.

Good day. Oh, do our new movie theme, eh? Yeah, okay.

Good morning. May I help you? Yeah.

Good night. 'Bye.

Good night. Thank you, Inspector.

Got a map? Map.

Great. That'd start him up.

Guys. Shut up, Ma.

Have you ever been in here before? Yeah.

He can't get any further back Shut up.

He doesn't like him much. Where's Pam? I got to find Pam.

He doesn't play hockey no more. He's a cop.

He hooked up our stereo, eh? I can't get out. The doors are stuck.

He's lying! Check the machine. No. I'm not lying.

Hello. My wife.

Here. Try these. Good idea. Beauty, clerk.

Hey, hoser! What?

Hey, thanks a lot. Okay.

Hey, that's the loony bin, eh? Yeah, it sure looks spooky up there.

Hey, there's Hawkland. It's the press. I'll handle them.

Hey, whiplash. How's it going? Just fine, thanks.

Hey, who's driving? I am because you're too loaded to drive.

Hey! What kind of movie is this? Okay. Here's how to get

Hi, I'm Jack Hawkland, your lawyer. How's it going, eh?

How come we're going home? Don't worry about it.

How did he get in there? I didn't do it!

How did Pam's dad die? He was electrocuted.

How is she? She's about the same, I'm afraid.

How long ago was it? When did he die?

How much more? Oh, about 10 or 12 cases.

How's it going, eh? Shh!

How's it going, eh? Welcome to our movie, eh? Okay.

How's that? Beauty. Take it up to 30 this time.

I am not, eh? Yeah, you are, too.

I beg your pardon? Wait.

I didn't do it, I swear. Don't slice cheese in here, will you?

I do. I do.

I don't have the stomach for it. You stinking hypocrite.

I don't know. Yes, I guess so. Is this the available bed?

I got to get some new underwear. Jeez, bootlegs.

I hope it's not something that I've done. No, of course not.

I never played that game before. Well, your name's right here.

I think so. Okay. See you later.

I told him to go the other way. I'm sorry.

I told you that was a mistake. I'm skating there, you know.

I'll crack. I know I will. Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

I'm a witness. Police! I didn't do nothing.

I'm calling the police. No way. We got jobs.

I'm letting go. I'm letting go.

I'm sure. Okay.

I've got to put up the screen, too, eh? Don't forget.

In case the party goes all night? We got two kegs.

Is it poison? Like, could it kill you? No, no.

Is your nose bleeding? Yeah.

It usually stops bleeding by now, eh? This isn't working.

It was not. We had a lot of popcorn, too. Oh.

It was you. Clean up the mess, boys.

It's $20. Beauty.

It's going pretty good. Shh!

It's like a ghost town, isn't it? Yeah.

It's my side. Don't go over that line. What line? Where?

It's open. Two at a time.

It's real big, eh? Yeah.

Japanese, eh? Yes, sir.

Jeez, I ain't playing hockey again. Tunnel to the brewery. Take off!

Jeez, no, I'd never noticed that. Yeah.

Jeez, travel, eh? Here you go. Beauty.

Jeez, what is this, eh? It's a nuclear bomb shelter. Come on.

Just a second, boys. Okay, Inspector.

Keep quiet. Give me my hat.

Last one in the house is a big idiot. Take off.

Let's get out of here, okay? Yeah.

Let's go, dear. Beauty, eh?

Let's go, dear. See you, Inspector.

Let's go. No, wait.

Let's go. Take off. She likes me, eh?

Let's see if they're in their room. Don't push.

Level five? Level five.

Like, uh, we drive them all the time, eh. Well, take off, eh.

Look how huge it is, eh? Okay.

Maybe with some spit We won't be able to fix the film, eh?

Miss Elsinore? Hey, Rosie.

Mr. Smith is waiting for you. Where is he?

My brother's a murderer. Take off.

No point in steering now. Take off. You steer this thing.

No way. Give me one.

No way. Go to the brewery. All right.

No, let's report it to our boss. No, lost and found's a better idea.

No, they're all on the ice. We'd better report this to our boss.

Not a bad score either. 21 10 59.

Now that hoser's growling. Yeah.

Oh, come on. How come everybody's going, eh?

Oh, come on. What about my turn? We're going to do this instead.

Oh, jeez, that's a good idea, eh? Yeah.

Oh, yeah, Mr. Wizard. You know it. Let me try. I'm a genius.

Okay, another topic. Zoom out, eh? Yeah.

Okay, do it now. No, no! He'll get mad.

Okay, eh? I'll go with you, eh?

Okay, here. Okay, coming, credit card.

Okay, I know my rights. Hey, who's in this room?

Okay, I've had a couple. So? Okay. Time for the movie review, eh.

Okay, let's see. What are you going to do?

Okay, let's take a look, sir. He was not wearing any clothes.

Okay, see you guys later. Hey, thanks for the jobs, eh?

Okay, she's fainted. Call an ambulance. It's on its way, sir.

Okay, turn it on. Okay.

Okay, zoom out, eh? Beauty idea.

Okay. Hey, sit down.

Okay. Right over there, please.

Oktoberfest. Geez, I've had enough beer for a while.

Open the door. We're going to get loaded.

Our nosey little friends? It must be them.

Our topic is movies. Yeah.

Put her down right over here. Let me get a blanket.

Ram her from behind. Come on. What?

Really? By a rig.

Really? Oh, yes, I never forget a thing.

Same concentration of formula? Mmm hmm.

See her looking at me? She thought you were some kind of freak.

Shall I time code it? Yes.

So I heard. Yes.

So, like, give us our free beer. You want free beer? Go to the brewery.

So? Okay, go back to movies.

Somebody tried to kill him. You stay here. Come on.

Sorry. I can't see, eh?

Sounds like a British New Wave band. Yeah. Beauty sound.

Steamroller. I'm steamrolling you. Take off.

Stick a pin in his bum, eh? No way.

Take off, eh? Get out.

Take off, eh? He's party pooping.

Take off, eh? How come everybody's so ticked, eh?

Take off, you hoser. You take off, you knob.

Take off. If you put

Take off. The next century.

That song's making them fight, eh? Yeah. Do it again.

That's her. Hey, how you doing?

That's okay. Jeez, you're real nice.

That's right. That's my birth date. October 21, 1959.

That's us. Yeah.

The Statue of Liberty. Psst, act!

There is a line. If you put your mouth

There's a tunnel to the brewery. Let's go!

They're going to kill us all. Hands in your pockets.

They're going to kill us all. Hands in your pockets.

This is my brother, Doug. Oh, excuse me. How's it going?

This isn't heaven. This sucks. Don't talk.

This the one stolen from the hospital? That's it.

To our new jobs. Yeah, beauty.

Turn the lights on. It was his fault. He wrecked it.

Twenty four. Oh, yeah. Sorry.

Twenty four. Yeah.

Two minutes and holding. Okay.

Two minutes for elbowing. Let's get out of here!

Uh oh. Watch out. Cops! What?

Wait a sec. We didn't do it. Yeah, that's right. We's innocent, eh?

We got a cover. She's all right.

We have them now. Just like I told you.

We're getting out of here. No way.

We're late. Let's go. Remind me to pay his bill on time, eh?

We're lost. It's a big brewery.

Well, get him out of that bed. That's not my job, I'm sorry.

Well, make up your mind, eh? Yeah, he was sleeping.

Well, thank you. Mmm hmm.

What are you doing here? Well, I

What are you doing? It'll just take a moment.

What are you on, Valium? Maybe I ought to crank his tail?

What did the doctor say? Catatonic schizophrenia.

What do you mean? You're a cute little guy.

What the hell was that? It wasn't me.

What would a thing like that cost? Oh, $4,000 or $5,000. I don't remember.

What's going on out there? Damn it, McKenzie, shut up.

What's going on? I don't know.

What's my job? Help him.

What's the reason for this? Are you Claude Elsinore?

Where are the beers? I'll find them.

Where are the fools with the mouse? They're with Henry Green.

Where are they going? I don't understand it.

Where are you guys going, eh? What? Get out of here.

Where is he? Oh, he's back in the thing.

Where'd you get that? I collect them.

Where's the honeymoon? Order. Order.

Where's the honeymoon? Order. Order.

Where's the other one? He's dead, Smith. You killed him.

Who was in this bed? Jean LaRose.

Who? It's Jean LaRose.

Who's driving? You are.

Who's driving? You drive.

Who's John Elsinore? My father.

Who's that? Smith's assistant.

Why are you going this way? There's a shortcut.

Why don't we stay up all night? Beauty idea.

Will you shut up? Ah, you shut up.

Yeah, but I She's got a credit card.

Yeah, Chuck Norris for the defense, eh? Beauties.

Yeah, we got to start the movie. You need to keep growling.

Yeah. Oh, jeez. We better get going.

Yeah. How'd you like it? Yeah. I'm Bob McKenzie.

Yes? She's here.

Yes. Oh, my God! Look.

You asked for it. Take off. You hoser.

You boys have a nice nap? Well How's it going?

You boys want to come with us? Where are you going?

You can talk in here. Okay.

You didn't tell me we had company. I think you know the Inspector, dear.

You don't know how to drive this. I do.

You farted! No, it wasn't me. It was the chair, eh?

You got an opener? Yeah. I stole this.

You guys like a smoke? No, eh?

You have the check? Yes, it's right here.

You hoser. Take off.

You killed him. He's dead. I just

You know what a gaffer is, eh? Living proof of evolution.

You know what we got to do, eh? What?

you know, try to keep it cold. Okay. Try and keep dust off it, too.

You put us there. Thanks a lot! Yeah, we was innocent, too.

You take it to him. No way.

You take it to him. No, you.

You take it. I'm letting go.

You won't sue for whiplash? Hurry.

You'll like this. It's a jelly doughnut.

You'll like this. It's a jelly doughnut.

You're lying! Take off!

You're lying. I want to talk to you.

You're taking it. No.

You're tricking me. Come here.

Your moths? Yeah.

Your name's on this machine. What?

...and you can demand your money back.

...are still linked to motivation, but now we've added color distinction.

...that we bought at your beer store, eh?

'Bye now.

$5 million is an awful lot of money.

$7.90, please.

$14.70.