Tuca & Bertie (2019) - Season 1 Edit

A "forever friend."

A boy fry'nd!

A cowgirl, a snowblower, a popsicle stick.

A delicate marriage between crullers and Bundt cake, the crunt.

A feminist one where Mother Goose is not defined by her ability to lay eggs!

A full day of self empowering activities!

A little for you, mm, but more for me.

A little for you, mm, but more for me.

A loose, dangly Band Aid that's been infecting every other area of my life,

A lot of young people get caught up in the fantasy of buying a house

A love letter.

A mob of women are protesting Pastry Pete's Patisserie,

A pulpy pile of your true feelings, Bertie.

A role model for future generations, a beacon.

A tiny house?

About what's been going on with you.

Ack! Don't tell me what to do, worms.

Actually, I think we have one more delivery to make.

Actually, it's a little realtor secret.

Actually, it's just a magazine publisher.

Actually, no.

Actually, no.

Actually, realtors are shockingly tolerant of shenanigans.

Afraid to hear the hard truths about yourself?

After all the times I lotioned you!

After finally trying cocaine for the first time?

After five to seven years, we can upgrade to another home

After staying up all night watching car crash videos.

Agatha! I should never have left you!

Agh, back to the grind.

Ah, a gourmet food magazine! Which one?

Ah, ah, ah. Heading home already?

Ah, excellent!

Ah, excellent. Can you take dictation for me, my dear?

Ah, such a tragedy.

Ah, you better live a long time, you old witch.

Ah!

Ah!

Ah!

Ah! All done.

Ah! Got one of those new shushable flat screens, hmm? Nice.

Ah! Holy fucking shit, the freaking Bread Bowl?

Ah! I just want to live with you forever! Aah!

Ah! I'm free!

Ah! Mm!

Ah! The leggings already!

Ah! This is all too much!

Ah! Too poetic.

Ah! Yes, your felony.

Ah.

Ah.

Ah. Can't say I recommend it.

Ah. Lost in thought. It's good to let the mind wander.

All I wanted was to swim to that island.

All my underwear, my sex toys.

All of us, from the moment we're born.

All of which we covered in parts one through four.

All right, all ready.

All right, all right, here I am. Where the boys at?

All right, although this is highly unorthodox,

All right, everyone, now that we've gotten some housekeeping out of the way,

All right, gang, let's get this wingding bash a roo a ragin'!

All right, I guess I'll just lock up when I leave.

All right, let's get into it.

All right, switch on the charm.

All right! My first customer!

All thanks to my poor judgment.

All the books told me not to.

All these voicemails from Speckle and one...

All this talk about mortgages, and 30 years, and early death...

All you had to do was tell me.

All you have to do, Bertie, is better than that.

Already done! Funds are low!

Also, Athena, stop humping your tambourines!

Also, I'm gonna look really hot in 30 years.

Also, if you maul that guy any more, he's gonna die.

Also, this place comes complete with one non standard toucan.

Also, you'll need to hydrate soon.

Always refusing to make tough decisions.

Always remember, silence is the enemy!

Am I in my apartment?

Am I? You didn't seem to mind my behavior

Amber, what are you doing here? Who's manning the Cineplex?

Amezing? Amazing. It was amazing.

And a busload of troubled teens will be there to hang on your every word.

And add that our audience is expanding, ex specially in the southeast.

And all our mutual friends will hate you,

And an ally!

And aren't prepared to do the work, financially, psychologically,

And as such, we would like you to do our money.

And at the whim of people bigger and stronger than me.

And baby snakes slither out of my mouth in the middle of a meeting?

And blissful bidets for our blessed booty holes.

And both of you live together in this house for a very long time.

And come work for me.

And communicative with me because that's what a relationship is!

And deserves that job!

And ended up in the emergency room!

And everything outside is so blue?

And explore the entire spectrum of emotion.

And get a load of this powerful toilet.

And get some context on how the appellate court system works.

And gives you what you want?

And grab a handful of bloody viscera,

And guess what I found.

And guess what. I'm sorry!

And have one cup of coffee, and you're out. Boom, boom!

And he winked at me!

And here's a pickle for the road. Stay cool and be yourself.

And how about banana muffins?

And I already totally fricked it up.

And I can ruin you.

And I didn't stop him. I didn't say anything.

And I don't know why, and I'm scared.

And I end up all alone like Tallulah?

And I feel the most ardent about you, my dear Lord Deli Guy.

And I have 35 percent down in my space bag.

And I have to defend my best friend in a sex bug trial,

And I have to give a big presentation at work today!

And I just cannot.

And I love those kisses! Give it, give it, give it, give it.

And I love to sit in my house, surrounded by all my crap!

And I love you! Sorry to bother you. I'll just go now, bye!

And I need you to eat me so my soul can finally rest!

And I never adopt 12 babies, and I don't have a family,

And I take it all very seriously.

And I thought, yo, what if we baked together?

And I usually talk over you, but I just realized I'm a stupid asshole.

And I wanna talk about it!

And I wanted to keep feeling good, so I figured I'd check this out.

And I'd like to piggyback on what Bertie is saying

And I'll briefly think, "I should go back on birth control,

And I'm just a little leaf getting blown around.

And I'm not talking about Tuca here.

And I'm terrified that the whole thing is gonna come crashing down on me.

And I've barely cursed at all. It's fucking weird.

And I've never shared this with anyone before

And if I win, you need to babysit my nephew.

And if what you love most is clutter... [chuckles]

And if you can't get him, we'll let you grieve for an appropriate amount of time,

And if you don't remove it, it will rupture,  and you will die.

And if your murderer gets murdered,

And it's almost Molting Day.

And it's got more real pieces of fruit in it.

And it's hard to start fresh with a new career at our age.

And it's my beak brightening strip.

And it's so awkward.

And keep tackling the bigger picture stuff.

And meeting you, I just figure maybe I could work here, too!

And my body is holding my mind hostage" days.

And my loins still long for your feathery bosom.

And next door neighbor.

And no one else will ever love or understand you

And no one replied to my email about merch design.

And now everything's probably falling apart at work and everyone hates me.

And now I'm here in a grocery store that sells $12 bottles of air.

And now I'm very disappointed in you. Bad bird, bad!

And now it's time  for some virtual jerking.

And now let's switch on the deep clean to root out the panic.

And now that I'm thinking about it, probably some sex.

And now you're doing all this great stuff for yourself.

And now, for some tasteful clip art.

And now, here I am, seven hours later, still unsure.

And now, the ghost of St. Oriole flies over Bird Town,

And now, you can take back your sugar.

And now, you're discarding me.

And one of them through acting classes.

And one surprisingly short spring.

And pause for a moment, we'd all realize...

And possibly followed it up with a "boioioioing"!

And probably sit next to a dude eating the world's smelliest egg salad.

And she built all these sorts of secret passageways into her houses.

And she gets to make out with Coach Maple whenever she wants.

And snakes didn't even explode out of my mouth!

And so, our favorite lovebirds find themselves

And some of them are way on the outskirts of Bird Town.

And sometimes inanimate objects that talk...

And sometimes, I think about him.

And stay out of my bakery!

And stay out of my bakery.

And supply me with constant positive reinfo fo!

And ta da! Here you go!

And that bag? Well, that bag is in another bag, baby.

And that beak of yours? Huge.

And that nasty rooster sexually harassed us today!

And that... you don't take them for granted.

And that's Athena. She's the smart one.

And that's Chef Dante Ferrari!

And that's his grandma!

And that's how we can triple our revenue by the end of the third quarter.

And that's my laptop.

And that's not all.

And the fire pit? Purely ornamental.

And the leggings.

And the puppies! Hey, babies!

And the things that they like to do.

And then go home and binge on interior design shows until I feel sick.

And then I have no connections left?

And then I let it happen to someone else! It was like the lamest déjà vu.

And then we'll get you right back out there!

And then we'll have you fine folks on your way.

And then, it'll be purely ornamental.

And then, when the last drop of wine is drunk...

And there it is.

And there's a lady on her phone in there all day, so we can't poop!

And think of all the time you'll save not watching a fireplace

And this is my ChapStick! I bought this ChapStick!

And this is my client, and you will treat her with respect.

And this is my partner and adult daughter Sophie.

And this is our au pair Beakles.

And this is where they'll find our bodies.

And this new bird waltzes in with no experience whatsoever,

And those meetings do drag on. Might be better to sit this one out

And to keep the lights on in that dingy apartment of yours.

And tonight, maybe we can do some celebrating

And under "occupation" for said account owner,

And water your cactus when you're out of town.

And we could, you know, I don't know, target some ads.

And we have savings for a down payment.

And we'll make out for exactly two minutes before he grabs my left boob.

And we're having a really big fight right now, but she's my best friend!

And what did that get her?

And what else, Screechiest One? What else should we reject?

And when his family came back in spring...

And when she passed away, we put her ashes in there.

And whisk you away to the desert

And whose stumpy ass torso is that?

And you didn't warn me?

And you ended up just like her!

And you feel sorry for them!

And you gave my grandmother away.

And you might find there's an even better way

And you never wanna have fun adventures anymore.

And you'd be a moron not to cut that shit out of your lady pipes.

And you'll end up alone!

And you'll never amount to anything?

And you'll never be happy in a relationship

And you're gonna get married, and have babies, and host dinner parties

And you're not boring. You're a magnificent little weirdo.

And, boom, Pastry Pete offers her an apprenticeship!

And, gosh, I hope I become half the woman you are.

And, Sophie, would you like to admit that condo loan you defaulted on

And, uh, freelance junk collector.

And, uh... [coughs]

And... I bought a house!

And... wiki wagga wagga yaay.

Anyhoo, I'm swinging by our place...

Anyhoo, my friend was hoping to get your number.

Anyhow, tomorrow's even better for the presentation.

Anyone else wanna have a go?

Anyone else wanna share a mantra, huh?

Anyway, Rebecca thinks we should make an offer now,

Anyways, what other neighbor stuff can we do?

Are those pubes?

Are we gonna sit around and tell scary stories?

Are you back here?

Are you gonna be a big girl, or do you need the robot?

Are you gonna cut me up and sew my booty hole

Are you here for our "buy 40, get one free" goldfish sale?

Are you just saying my deepest fears and insecurities?

Are you listening to yourself? Bertie, you have a boyfriend!

Are you mad at me?

Are you okay?

Are you serious, sir? You don't discipline your child.

Are you serious?

Are you shitting serious?

Aren't crunts already world famous?

Aroma therapy?

As a man, it's so nice to finally have my voice heard, you know?

As it comes to symbolize the frivolity of the idle rich!

As soon as folks get a taste of Sweet Beak!

As you can see, this home has tremendous copper pipes.

As you can see, this jaguar and I are two adults with our shit together.

Ashley, who cares? Terrence.

Asking for what I want is not my style.

Astral projection?

At least you got the good sense to take my money.

Attempting to transition into an established mating ritual.

Aw, jeez.

Aw, just come with us. It'll be fun.

Aw, man!

Aw, okay.

Aw, okay. But now I'm all pumped to work my Tuca magic and be useful to the world.

Aw, shit!

Aw, well

Aw, yeah, I'm about to bang out a ton of these gigs today!

Aw, yeah!

Aw, yeah! Imaginary fucking.

Aw, you guys.

Aw!

Aw! You seem sweet.

Aw.

Aw. And you always let me eat your snacks.

Aw. I'm sorry.

Aw. My best friend, Bertie, loves it when I fill drawers with ham.

Aw. That would be great.

Aw. You'd make such a cute, old widow!

Aww, poor Bertie.

Aww!

Back in the olden days,

Backtalk? That's 50 sit ups, Songthrush!

Bad brain! Bad brain!

Bad sex bug! Bad!

Bake a big batch of croissants

Baked by the Tasty Num Nums award winning inventor of the crunt.

Baker Barb.

Be a good boy and eat your gamby!

Be so kind as to beguile us

Be still.

Beakles, no!

Beaks, and boobs inside the ride at all times, thank you.

Beat it, Bruce!

Because for some reason, this is how you picture old age.

Because it's dangerous.

Because it's fun to lookie loo and pretend we're rich.

Because no one is ever good enough for you!

Because nothing will ever be as good as ketchup.

Because that's a vital step in baking croissants, of course.

Because there isn't a fireplace.

Because this place is a dream!

Because you actually have a job!

Because you can't get defensive, so you really internalize the guilt.

Because you insisted the buffet was all you can eat!

Because you're horny. [laughs]

Because you're my home.

Because, as adults know, shit must be kept.

Bed fries.

Before Coach Maple, even.

Before grasping the left breast of his mate.

Being a bully is cool again!

Being an adult is the enemy!

Being responsible is the enemy!

Bernard, bring us the beertinis!

Bernard, good to see you, too!

Berticia, you're a queen. I'm so proud of you.

Bertie and I are committed to this process.

Bertie ertie, I can't see you!

Bertie here would like to challenge you to a croissant bake off.

Bertie is the best chef in the whole world and she can kick your ass.

Bertie just wants me to be my best self!

Bertie, are you cleaning up?

Bertie, are you okay?

Bertie, come here.

Bertie, come on outside and help me set the table.

Bertie, did you have anything to add?

Bertie, do you have enough mustard to fill a bath tub?

Bertie, give it a try.

Bertie, how many Band Aids in a doctor's dozen?

Bertie, I think I'm ready to call my sister.

Bertie, I'd like to thank you for speaking up today.

Bertie, it's that dirty turtie!

Bertie, look at these sex bugs. They're just trying to have a good time.

Bertie, make room on the counter for these hot trays.

Bertie, make room on the counter for these hot trays.

Bertie, no.

Bertie, please, only first timers sing by the fountain.

Bertie, should I squeeze lemon into an open wound?

Bertie, talk to me.

Bertie, thank you for your mentorship.

Bertie, that was true power.

Bertie, Tuca is in the hospital.

Bertie, wait for me!

Bertie, what's wrong?

Bertie, will you be our new senior operations analyst?

Bertie, would you like to make your opening statement now?

Bertie!

Bertie!

Bertie! Bertie!

Bertie! Bertie! How many teaspoons are in an ounce?

Bertie! Bertie! The garlic made me better!

Bertie! I couldn't help but notice your gorgeous pastry making technique.

Bertie! Thank you so much for meeting me before work.

Bertie? Bertie! Bertie!

Bertie's boss barely notices we exist, I swear.

Best to not spread this around. It could make our company look bad, so...

Better bring an umbrella. Maybe I'll listen to a podcast on the way.

Bigger!

Bike pump, old porn, new porn, frying pan, screwdriver...

Bird flew right into her face, gave her a concussion.

Blah, blah, I'm Bertie's dumb, annoying coworker, Dirk.

Bleh!

Blur, blur, blur. Bang, bang.

Bone jour. [chuckles]

Boo yah! Water sports! Ba bow! [laughs]

Boom! Problem solving.

Borkle and Squeaky are my only friends. [laughs]

Boss, boss, where is the boss?

Boy, oh, boy, I sure do love these Sweet Beak pastries. [laughs]

Breakfast burrito.

Breakfast nook, moon roof, spa tub, uh, farmhouse sinks with Wi Fi.

Bright red.

Brilliant! [laughs]

Brilliant! You really know yourself. I long for such clarity!

Bring more cocktails to the dressing room, and keep that booze a'flowing.

But another offer has come in for the house.

But as long as you don't act on them, weird crushes are cool.

But at night, I'm a creep.

But broken things can become beautiful with a little patience.

But by smell and appearance.

But by smell and appearance.

But do not get intimidated.

But don't worry. I have a foam roller. We'll roll you right out.

But don't worry. We've got the best doctors.

But first, to display my lovely ingredients,

But have you seen The Nests of Netherfield?

But I can't do that without you, so get back to me.

But I don't know. It's all happening so fast.

But I don't wanna be that person anymore.

But I feel like I could tell you my craziest ideas.

But I get the sense that she's choosing not to.

But I hate it and it's nasty. Look, it's our turn!

But I hate possibilities.

But I have to be the worry wart.

But I just don't really like anybody.

But I know you're the only person who can help me.

But I needed all those novelty socks.

But I paid a deposit!

But I was just buying you time.

But I'm free this afternoon.

But I'm not chasing after you anymore.

But I'm sure there are plenty of kind folks

But I've taken for granted that your face will always be there.

But in the small scheme of things,

But it doesn't matter 'cause it's all in my head.

But it was great seeing you, Auntie Tallulah.

But it won't be so charming when you're my age.

But it's a long drive and I'm afraid of crabs.

But it's not just the sex, or Speckle.

But it's okay. I have a plan.

But just think about how you'll be helping the environment.

But let me just say one more thing.

But maybe you're just having one of your pre panic attacks, you know?

But my mom was crafty and took good care of us.

But not too far from a hospital.

But now it's all, "Tuca, get your box of stuff out of the way!"

But now, an uncharacteristic moment of silence for DJ Parkour...

But now... [gulps]

But of course.

But okay.

But right now, our friendship just feels like so much... work.

But since you're anxious, I'll say nothing.

But sometimes all you need to do is show up.

But sometimes I wonder, what would it be like to be a bigger cog?

But text me his photo, and I'll plot his murder the moment I'm free.

But that was after she made her own money in the plumage industry,

But that was great. Next?

But that woman put nothing but positivity and love in this world

But that's crazy! Yeah.

But the arms of an adjunct.

But the new me would also say

But the way you say them makes them sound mean, so...

But then at Countess Hennypeather's summer equinox

But then I pressured you.

But then, Draca extracted it.

But there's not much I can say that... [gasps]

But this is about me and how I freeze up all the time.

But those two old birds are, like, listening to everything we say.

But wait. What's this?

But when we zoom back in again, close enough to see the details,

But when you're not around, guess what.

But whenever I'm quiet, I hear my estranged friend say mean things,

But without them, the board game industry would immediately go under.

But you haven't met the sex bugs yet.

But you know sex bugs can lay dormant

But you need to be honest with me

But you sound bat shit crazy.

But you were like a runaway train with this house.

But you're a filthy little bird, aren't you?

But you're all over the place.

But you've only been here one day, and you're doing amazing!

But your ex girlfriend sounds like a big meanie.

But, nah, it makes me crazy!"

But... but I'm a good bird.

Buying a house with my ex wife was a disaster.

Buying a jaguar is just the Tuca version of buying a house.

By all accounts, you seem to find me dreadfully foolish.

By the Bird Town Medical Society

Bye!

C O N. CON!

C U L T. CULT!

Call me if you ever want to quit your desk job

Can a mother overlove her daughter?

Can I come with you?

Can I have a bite? [munches]

Can I keep it?

Can I throw a party at your house next weekend?

Can you believe he just grabbed me like that?

Can you believe that?

Can you drop me off at the arcade?

Can you juice these jeans?

Can't chat, Bruce. We're trying to chase down some sugar.

Can't handle the real world, so you run away to these losers.

Can't take my eyes off those calves.

Can't wait for you to accomplish something I can brag about.

Candle facts.

Capitalists!

Case dismissed.

Cashing checks from my rich auntie, mobile notary again,

Caw!

Center for Sex Bug Control.

Chantelle, I swear, it was hilarious.

Charming. I'd love to hear some of your ideas.

Check this out.

Cheers.

Cheesy!

Chefs hate that!

Cherish those you love, Tuca.

Child, you overwatered.

Chop chop! Next song, ladies!

Claudette never smiles!

Cloaca! [echos]

Closed caskets. Every one.

Coach Maple trained me in the mornings before camp.

Coach Maple?

Cock in the Pit!

Code red, code red! They've seen the truth!

Come [groans]

Come here and give your grandma some kisses.

Come look at this pantry. It's got a Lazy Susan and a Lively Linda.

Come now.

Come on in, boys!

Come on, Bertie Bertie!

Come on, Bertie! Just a little further.

Come on, birds.  We gotta hustle! [grunts]

Come on, Dante. I want those kisses.

Come on, guys.

Come on, third wheels. Let's go.

Come on, Tuca. Let's go!

Come on, you get to have your things everywhere.

Come on!

Come on!

Come on. Tell him off!

Come on... Oh, my God. No.

Come. Lie in the water.

Completely underdressed for company.

Confidence!

Confident yet relatable.

Consider it a neighborly gift.

Consider me a built in entertainment center with no off switch.

Consider me impressed.

Cookie omelet, anyone?

Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.

Cooling off now. Bye!

Could you maybe talk to him about proper office behavior?

Could you read the instructions

Crab Thingz! Make your shell pretty!

Crab Thingz. Eating smaller, weaker crabs!

Crafting fashions that keep housewives, starlets, and investors happy.

Crap hole, dick ass bitch! Oh, how do I stop this shit?

Crème brûlée torch? That's me. I'm on that.

Croissants, Bundt cakes,

Cute!

Daddy, I'm gonna have to call you back.

Damn it! Once again, the siren call of delicious freebies

Damn it. That's a fun thing to say, but tough to hear.

Damn it. The one time I didn't fall asleep naked!

Damn, I'm good!

Damn, that dude loves bananas.

Damn, that's good.

Damn, vent! Why you gotta do me like this?

Damn. Baker Bess

Damn. Good one, Speckle.

Damn. This family's ugly!

Damn. You all shamed me.

Dare I say, croissantiest and best.

Deal with it!

Déjà vus are supposed to be mysterious and cool!

Delicious! I love it! I I can't live without it!

Denied! Go in the street!

Did he give you the sex bugs?

Did she marry some rich tycoon?

Did the landlord ask you to?

Did you feel it?

Did you get that message I sent?

Did you girls want me to order pizza?

Did you go to the beach?

Did you know a jiggly buffalo

Did you know he won a Tasty Num Nums Award last year

Did you say you graduated from culinary school?

Did you see my sugar bowl? I I put it here like an hour ago?

Did you use, ma'am?

Didn't even get to use my new flamethrower.

Didn't that pastry guy give you his number?

Didn't you?

Die, die, die!

Diet tricks for losing those fat legs and that birdseed booty?

Dirk is very good! Chill, guys, chill!

Dirk, I think you should pack your things and leave the office for the day.

Dirk, why don't you get us started?

Do we really need to use the word "assault"?

Do what you did with that bartender in Mooseville.

Do you bugs wanna be a real band, or are we just having fun here?

Do you even work on this floor?

Do you feel it inside, in your pulp?

Do you have any Ethernet cables I could use to start a LAN party?

Do you need help with your virtual sex transaction?

Do you still have it?

Do you think Pastry Pete does this to everyone?

Does it sing? It does now.

Doesn't mean I'm not swimming in gigs.

Doesn't mean we need to live in the house for that long.

Doggie tour guide, and noble motory.

Doing it.

Don't break up with me!

Don't judge.

Don't judge.

Don't let her be so rude to you.

Don't look at me. Being right all the time is a burden.

Don't make yourself a new boyfriend out of fries.

Don't turn around,

Don't want to live with you? Of course I want to live with you.

Don't wear a watch. I go by the sun.

Don't worry. Everything's going to be okay.

Don't worry. I used their bathroom anyways.

Don't worry. We'll make it all back

Don't you dare say another word about my mother.

Don't you dare.

Don't you have a computer in your apartment?

Double salami with extra salami, hold the bread?

Down, puppies!

Draca sent me.

Draca, I see you're a woman of few words, which I admire,

Draca! What are you doing here?

Drizzle on some chocolate and powder, and call them "chouquettis."

Dropping sweets, reminding us to keep our loved ones close.

Dry off and come on over for dinner!

Dude, that's the same chick that's been partying here every night

Dumpling delivery?

Dying?

Easy.

Eep!

Eep!

Eep! [clears throat]

Eep! Sorry, we're shoplifting!

Eesh. Who did that?

Eh, four stars.

Eh, I got seven kids.

Eh! Hands, why must you betray me?

Eh! Sorry.

Eh. There's always more houses.

Eh... Boy, oh, boy, do I love bird peepin'.

Eh... Ooh!

Eight burners, three sinks, and one crème brûlée torch.

Energy healing?

Enwrapped with passion once again.

Even back in college, you didn't listen to me

Even though we just made up, I still have an upset feeling.

Even though you had a super bad case of the Berties.

Even when I go off to theater camp.

Ever since we moved in together and work's gotten really busy,

Ever since you and Tuca stopped talking,

Every Tuesday and Thursday at 7:45 p.m.

Everybody, fuck off!

Everyone is gonna leave you in the end.

Everyone knows that. You need to go back to toilet school.

Everyone loved me.

Everything starts falling apart the second you're gone.

Everything was great when we lived together.

Everything you're saying is totally reasonable,

Ew!

Ew!

Ew! Okay, fine!

Ew.

Ew.

Ew.

Exactly! Thank you!

Excellent show, Tuca!

Except for this one, because it's jammed.

Excuse me, do you know where I can find

Excuse me, while I wait for my terrified friend,

Explain!

Extermination? You can't just kill them!

Fashion magazine, dirty dishes.

Favorite place to hide during a thunderstorm, on the count of three.

Fear not, ladies. Your chef has finally returned.

Feather curler? Okay.

Feed me more files!

Feel it.

Figure this out, you two.

Finally, the intersection of passion and safety overflows

Fine by me.

Fine, but it's your fault for giving me gum.

Fine!

Fine.

Five stars, right?

Five years ago.

Follow me.

Followed the instructions and everything, then I kicked things up a notch.

For combining crullers and Bundt cakes?

For example, enjoy a pornographic film together."

For example, I called in sick to work today,

For horny people who don't know how to have sex.

For Miss Marzipan's School for Horrid, Horrid Children,

For now, Maxwell, you give him yours!

For six months, 11 days, and eight hours, right?

For the brief time that she was in it.

For the next woman to climb through.

For the past two months.

For the women who weren't allowed near them.

For the yolk and white must be yin and yang,

For this sex bug medication out loud, please?

Forget those worms. Look at me.

Four stars.

Fraudulence! Those weren't my impeccably composed words!

Fresh mail, coming in hot! Hyah!

Friend, hero, connoisseur of snacks!

From my own phone?

From what? Wait. Are there giant crabs in this lake?

Fruit roux.

Fuck, shit, asshole, dick face, shit, fuck, the "C" word!

Fuck! Fuck! Be cool! Be cool!

Fucking mother plucking seed sack!

Gah!

Gamby, be quiet!

Gamby?

Garlic, garlic, dish soap, garlic, and a bag for the garlic.

Get off my shit, Jeremy!

Get on up there and work your Tuca magic.

Get on!

Get out, Mom!

Get started on those crünts. And don't neglect the crunts.

Get the fuck out, Mom!

Girl Thingz! Gender is binary.

Girl Thingz. Moms just don't understand.

Girl, when he splashes that vinegar... Mm, God damn!

Girl, you horny as shit!

Girl, you stupid.

Girl, you're a killer out there!

Give it, give it! Kisses!

Give me those kisses. I want them.

Give us back our sugar, you half wet, half dry, full slime booger.

Glad to see you're okay.

Glug, glug, glug. Smooch, smooch, smooch.

Go back to your data processing, you ungrateful and talentless little girl.

Go get him, girl.

Go here.

Go jerk off in a lake.

Go to work. I know.

Go, Grandma! Go!

Gobble me up, sweet child!

God damn it, Carol!

Good day, everyone.

Good day!

Good day! We are Beauregard and Blenda Bartholomew.

Good idea.

Good luck with your banana ride share business.

Good morning, all.

Good news! The doctor is almost done looking inside you.

Good road trip, chica.

Good thing I'm going to that empowerment meeting today.

Good thing that's not us. [laughs uncomfortably]

Got it!

Got it!

Got to keep pounding it until it firms up, and stiffens...

Great idea!

Great, how about we step into the Seedy Motel

Great! Let me just check over your application.

Great! Now it's sexual!

Great! What's that?

Great. Helpful.

Great. Joint checking account it is.

Great. Listen, our credit scores are excellent,

Great. You want a muffin or...

Greg, it would be great if you could read the music before rehearsal.

Grovel grovel, guilty, innocent, blah blah.

Guy who stepped on gum!

Ha ha! Ta da!

Ha!

Ha! A tiger!

Ha! Dubai.

Hair plugs for the bald ones.

Happens all the time.

Hard nope.

Has driven me headfirst into the jagged cliffs of boring bullshit.

Has he ever done anything like that before?

Have a warm Molting Day!

Having fun in here?

He had molted all his feathers and frozen to death.

He has access to free ham.

He hated silence as much as he loved parkour.

He honked my goose! I mean, boob.

He knows I'm not sick! He knows you have sex bugs!

He prepared to stick through winter,

He said I was so good, he didn't believe I was just 12.

He said I was the best swimmer he'd seen at camp.

He says he found this on a public street turtle.

He told me he wanted to show me something in the woods,

He was just a stupid frat boy pelican.

He'd confess to sexually harassing me!

He's a professional. I'm not good enough.

He's cute, he's sweet,

He's gently disappointed in me!

He's got the body of a tenure track professor,

He's just gonna be taking up space in your head like a sexy tumor.

He's perfect for you!

He's so cool, he's like a crunchy leaf of lettuce on a sweet ass tomato.

He's the first chef to steal all his recipes from his grandma.

He's very passionate.

Hell, yeah, it was!

Hell, yeah! Ripping off Band Aids feels great!

Hello, I'm Dr. Sherman. I'm here to examine

Hello, space? Looks like I'm needed elsewhere.

Hello! [exclaims]

Hello! I'm St. Oriole.

Hello?

Hello?

Hello? Creepy plumber guy?

Hello. I have 16 orders of meat dumplings and

Hello. I'm a rich, sexy astronaut,

Help.

Her dim bulb of a brain was bright enough to stick close to Auntie Tallulah.

Here to perform it, my lovely assistant Roberta Songthrush!

Here you go, champ.

Here, drink mine, too.

Here. It's my auntie's signature cocktail:

Here. Smell this.

Here's a pamphlet.

Here's my card.

Here's the plan. Step one, get supplies... in bulk!

Here's to rich people writing checks to guys like us

Here's your extra, extra small espresso to go.

Here's your maple walnut latte, Ms. Bertie.

Hey, are are you okay?

Hey, at least this is nice, though.

Hey, baby.

Hey, baby. Yeah, I'm okay. I should have called, I'm sorry.

Hey, Bertie, are you coming to the meeting?

Hey, Bertie. I've been thinking.

Hey, Dirk!

Hey, don't worry.

Hey, good job, Bertie. You nailed that creep.

Hey, hey!

Hey, hog head! You cut us off back there.

Hey, I I got to run to the bakery. I'll see you later.

Hey, I need that sugar bowl back.

Hey, I wanna bake!

Hey, I'm being bullied! Hey! [grunts]

Hey, ice cream!

Hey, it doesn't have to be pithy or catchy or cute.

Hey, it's me, Chef Dant Uh...

Hey, Jeremy, ring Bertie up for this book

Hey, look! It's those teens from the mall!

Hey, maybe we could try something different tonight?

Hey, maybe you can use this.

Hey, relax! You're okay.

Hey, short shorts. Nice itching.

Hey, sis. Happy Molting Day!

Hey, sometimes life gives you cancer and you make can sirloin steak

Hey, Speckle, can I use your laptop?

Hey, that's my bike!

Hey, that's my mug.

Hey, that's us!

Hey, the balance is back. Fuck yeah!

Hey, there. Come to our next meeting.

Hey, upstairs neighbor! Dapper Dog!

Hey, upstairs neighbor. I'm here to be your ChoreGoose.

Hey, what do you think if I hang this picture up here?

Hey, what if I come help you get the promotion?

Hey, what the fuck?

Hey, where'd y'all go?

Hey, where's Bertie at?

Hey, why the bleak beak?

Hey, you can't spell "drink" without "Dirk" and some other letters.

Hey, you spent a whole hour out of the house,

Hey, you're home.

Hey, you're looking at the new bad boy of architecture.

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey! [grunts]

Hey! Hey!

Hey! Wanna race?

Hey! What are you and your dirty friend doing?

Hey.

Hey.

Hey.

Hey. What's up, guys?

Hi, I'm Connie, your friendly virtual "Reali Tease" online assistant.

Hi, I'm Ultra Sam, the ultrasound machine.

Hi, uh, Rebecca. Did they receive our offer?

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi. I'm Big Hairy Stallion69.

Hi. Uh, I'm Bertie. I've seen you around.

His family begged him to migrate, but he was obstinate.

Historically, they've been natural enemies.

Hm... I don't know.

Hmm, a Tuca & Speckle Day.

Hmm, but isn't that how you got hired?

Hmm, extra strength, so...

Hmm, feather straightener.

Hmm, he looks pretty busy.

Hmm, hmm, hmm.

Hmm, let me see.

Hmm, yes.

Hmm! Sweet and sour sauce.

Hmm?

Hmm?

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm. "Sex Bug Lane," "historical landmark," "don't kill."

Hmm. Mm. Mm.

Hmm. Okay. Thank you so much for the information.

Hmm. There we go.

Hmm. This mean mirror keeps my ego in check. Keep!

Hmm. Wanna go torch your student loan paperwork?

Hmm. Well, it's been a wonderful day.

Hmm...

Hmm...

Hmm...

Hmm...

Hmm... [clears throat]

Hmm... [clicks tongue] Okay, under "account owner,"

Holland needs to fill that position, and I told him I'd think about it,

Holy shit! I needed that.

Hooray for Bertie!

Hope I didn't bother you.

Hope you enjoyed that Rhino Town classic.

Hot Sex for Agreeable People, you'll love that one.

Hour five, I stopped for gas and had a snack.

Hour four, I thought, "But maybe it's nice for a stranger

Hour one, I was like, "This feels right."

Hour three, I was all, "Yep, this is definitely weird."

Hour two, I wondered, "Is this weird?"

How about "hot potato"?

How about our "buy one, get 40 free" goldfish sale? [laughs]

How about we make the mirrors nice?

How about, "Hey, Holland. Can't come in today.

How am I gonna pay rent this month?

How are you so sure that this is going to work out?

How did a slide from high school get in there? Um...

How do you like being an architect, baby boy?

How does this look?

How does this look?

How fast should you apply it? For how long?

How much do you apply? The whole thing?

How to Rise, Rise, Ascend, and Never Fall:

How you've been mooching off your auntie for years?

Huh, he's reckless and has no spatial awareness.

Huh, I won't let you down!

Huh, wait a second.

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh? Oh!

Huh.

Huh.

Huh.

Huh.

Huh.

Huh.

Huh. Croissants.

Huh. Speckle's sugar.

I I wasn't sure if I had hung up properly

I already brought my own.

I also have some exciting news.

I am a goose.

I am done with today! I need a drink!

I am endangered and frankly disturbed by the flippancy of our municipal pavers!"

I am fun! I am brave!

I am never gonna sleep with you. Again.

I am not here for your entertainment.

I am not your plaything!

I am so anxious, I just wanna die!

I am the shape of my hand.

I am?

I ask, why not?

I asked to take you to the hospital several times.

I await the day you return to Puffin Heights."

I believe my buddy Bertie had something to contribute.

I bet he'd love to get a big ol' pole in here!

I bet I could lift two of you at once.

I bet it wasn't as bad as you think.

I better not run into anyone from work out here.

I bring a lot of zest to my environment.

I call them "rom coms," but that's just me!

I call them templates!

I can be quiet.

I can build you a desk with a salami dispenser.

I can finally cut loose and walk around here with my butt out!

I can go above and beyond for some randos while making that money.

I can't believe this!

I can't believe this.

I can't believe you're even bothering to talk to Pastry Puke.

I can't believe you've been to the Nests of Netherfield theme park!

I can't feel anything down there at this point.

I can't force you to make the right decision for your career.

I can't go with you this year.

I can't just be your rock all the time.

I can't think in here!

I can't. Hands are full.

I care so much.

I changed us from a cable bundle to a streaming bundle!

I command you to print.

I could learn to enjoy sharing.

I could never. It's too weird!

I could've had a baby on board!

I demand a trial! And Bertie will be my counsel!

I deserve to be treated like a person, and not an object.

I did good, maybe too good.

I did not teach her that.

I did numbers one, two, three, four, and eight, Bertie.

I didn't ask you to be here. I can take care of myself!

I didn't finish.

I didn't finish. Day three!

I didn't get them from sex.

I didn't know my new position would require so much public speaking.

I didn't lose interest.

I didn't spend an hour in hair and makeup to get my feathers ruffled!

I didn't think I'd react this way. [chuckles]

I didn't wanna be alone. Ow!

I do mostly data processing.

I do, but they're better than nothing!

I don't always agree with it.

I don't care if your phone is lost, you find a phone and you call Speckle!

I don't care!

I don't even work in this building.

I don't get why you use eggs.  They break

I don't have time to check. [growls]

I don't know what any of this means.

I don't know what I'm missing.

I don't know what those are. Uh, but sure.

I don't know where meat comes from.

I don't know why I thought we'd be ready to own a house together.

I don't know.

I don't know. I just didn't want it to hurt you or me.

I don't know. Sneakers. It's probably sneakers.

I don't know. This is all so hard.

I don't need some government approved, cut them up, ship them out,

I don't owe you anything.

I don't really question it.

I don't really see how that's relevant.

I don't swim, and I lost my phone. I want to go back to the cabin.

I don't think I'm in the best mood for a pithy mantra today.

I don't think we can hit them all by morning.

I don't wanna bring the festivities down with a bunch of sobriety talk.

I don't wanna go out.

I don't want that! I want to live with my boyfriend.

I don't want to be boring.

I dunno. She's about to go into surgery. You need to come right away.

I even have an outfit picked out for later.

I feel bad for splitting, but, boy, did I need a drink.

I feel like we have a problem with sexual harassment in this office,

I feel so free!

I feel so pent up and confused!

I felt guilty for making her move out and I wanted her to be happy.

I fill the shells with the scenes from my life and dreams.

I forgot to remove it when I left for lunch!

I fucked a glove once.

I get all my errands done, I'm focused at work,

I get to be called that because I'm such a good boy!

I get to nerd out about architecture

I give you the donut dive!

I got something important I gotta do!

I got what I wanted.

I got you these. You match these colors.

I got you, Claudette!

I got, like, a billion weird crushes going on at a time.

I gotta have them! I gotta have those kisses.

I gotta put these on the fridge.

I guess I could try a little if if that's what you want, Gamby.

I guess I'll finally get my box of stuff out of your way.

I guess now I'll go back to the hotel and fill a bucket with ice.

I guess there are  some things I stick with.

I had a weird acquaintance take me to the hospital.

I have a cot there.

I have a lot of experience working with sticky things.

I have my own key.

I have no control, no protection.

I have perfected this process, and in the interest of science,

I have so much I wanna ask you.

I have the whole day booked solid.

I have to go.

I have to say, it was "amezing." [laughs]

I have to say, this house is even more impressive in person.

I have...

I hope this means you're coming out to the cabin.

I hope you like shoddy safety and barfing.

I just can't.

I just don't want things to be weird with my family anymore.

I just got here, too.

I just graduated from a small town culinary school,

I just hope they let me have a sleepover in the third bedroom.

I just love seeing the different rituals of preparing and eating food,

I just made that up. I'm a trendsetter.

I just need to buck up and ask Holland for something.

I just need to drive in silence for a while and think.

I just need to...

I just never understood why you dropped out.

I just really liked that one.

I just think "Eat my ass, Kevin" is more direct.

I just wanna say y'all are doing great!

I just wanted to form some mature, adult friendships.

I just whipped them up... and they're perfect!

I just wish I could

I keep telling you the character's name is Mush Face.

I keep thinking it'd be fun to cut this thin and stringy like spaghetti,

I keep trying to roll with it and, like, talk to you,

I kept trying to text you how I felt, and

I knew something like this would happen!

I know I'm just a country canary who moved to the big city

I know that I want you now, and that's enough.

I know you. You're having one of your...

I know you're not good with this kind of stuff.

I know, Tuca. I know.

I know!

I know! I'll go visit Bertie.

I know! I'm so nasty.

I know.

I know. I tried.

I know. It's crazy.

I left town with Tuca. I'm just going through some stuff.

I let myself be treated badly.

I like jokes!

I like to cannonball into that pool of unearned cash!

I like you two.

I like you!

I love being the third wheel.

I love books, and this, this is the book I've been meaning to read, so...

I love that you can be honest with me.

I love that you can be honest with me.

I love that you care about Tuca, but she's resourceful and resilient.

I love the energy.

I love these candles.

I love thinking about how, from now on,

I love when you make up theme songs for me.

I love y'all!

I love you, too. Bye.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you. I'm so glad we moved in together.

I made a bake mistake.

I made you, and I can ruin you.

I married her for the green card. [laughs]

I may throw in some random sounds I've been workshopping like...

I maybe have a weird crush on Pastry Pete. [groans]

I mean from the world, from men.

I mean, have you seen this open house yet?

I mean, I love it. Why not?

I mean, I love Speckle. I have a good job.

I mean, I was cool with some light deli flirting, but then...

I mean, I'm kinda hoping things work out with my boyfriend moving in.

I mean, it sounded a little ornate to me.

I mean, like, if you don't call him,

I mean, please die.

I mean, sort of.

I mean, we were never going to live there forever.

I mean, your place, later today.

I messed up!

I might have peed in there.

I miss you! Ugh, I hate change!

I miss you. I want to be your best friend again.

I missed you so much, I made Speckle talk like you.

I missed you so much, I started a cult.

I missed you so much.

I need to get her back!

I need you.

I never asked you for anything. I came to see you.

I never said

I never wear makeup, but a first date seems like a great time to start.

I pray for the day you can't just drop everything to help me

I prefer to show off other assets.

I presume you're an expert on everything that this store sells.

I really should get back to my shit

I really wanted to exterminate those bugs.

I said my friend is not dirty!

I see.

I see. The paperwork for you will be a bit more complicated.

I should go get more water.

I should write greeting cards.

I shouldn't have let you take out that jelly jet without a life preserver.

I started sketching some ideas for it.

I still haven't seen her drink or nothing.

I still think of you as that fiery young song thrush

I think I do!

I think if you look at the data from this last quarter, it shows that

I think she could make the jump to mainstream.

I think that's all the orders.

I think we got this in the bag.

I think we're here.

I thought Dirk would feel so guilty during this meeting,

I thought my version was more to the point.

I thought you hated those calls.

I told you not to mix those lotions.

I told you, my auntie is a huge deal.

I took a little mosey around this store's bathroom,

I totally asked for the promotion, and, uh...

I totally get it if you just wanna cancel now.

I trained all summer to swim on my own to Peanut Butter Island.

I trust you. Cheers! [hums]

I trusted him. I thought I was special.

I turned on the lights at the glow worm exhibit.

I used that bathroom hard and hot, Bertie.

I used to help her wrap up gifts and I'd wonder,

I used to sleep here with my wife.

I wanna fix this house up, and I want you to live in it with me.

I wanna go be with my auntie and my sister.

I want a promotion!

I want to close tonight's session with an idea

I want to know that everything's going to be okay so I can relax! Ugh!

I want to live in the present and be here with you.

I want your full consent to put it here.

I wanted to do it. It's all I wanted to do.

I was doing all kinds of screwing.

I was just chillin', thinkin' up some new twists for some piggitty pretzels,

I was just practicing the quadruple cabriole de crünt.

I was late on the dismount. It's trash!

I was one big beaked baby.

I was saying yesterday about eagles.

I was so excited to find this here.

I was so excited.

I was so nervous to sit down with you.

I was thinking of inviting a certain someone

I was thinking we should be marketing to eagles because

I was waiting for you so we could pick out a Molting bush,

I was walking down the street when nature called.

I wasn't ready for tonight.

I wear them to help with my anxiety.

I wear too much cologne, I pronounce it "ex specially,"

I went to all their funerals.

I went to the mall and bought this new swimsuit.

I will be opting out of surgery.

I will kick your ass right now, you taint faced little pigeon licker!

I will not with this shit. I am finished.

I will not.

I will take care of it eventually.

I wish Bertie could've seen this.

I wish I could protect them.

I wish Speckle could have seen this.

I wish we could, but we're supposed to get back to Bird Town tonight.

I wish we had another toilet in the women's room.

I work as hard as I beach!

I would be good at it. I wanna do that,

I, um...

I... I can't!

I... I feel good!

I... I just need to feel like I live here, too, Bertie.

I... I'll be right back!

I'd cross the Nests of Netherfield a thousand times over

I'd like to get your input on some things.

I'll be home later tonight.

I'll be honest. I have no idea what you do.

I'll be right back. You just chill here.

I'll do it by the end of the day!

I'll just go ask him.

I'll let you know right away if I hear any news.

I'll miss you, Speckle.

I'll miss you, too, Big Hairy Stallion69.

I'm a mirror, ho. I just call it like I see it.

I'm a really important cog in the machine,

I'm actually here to make a high commitment purchase.

I'm afraid to. What if they don't wanna hear from me?

I'm all over that hand mixer. Pew, pew! Whoo!

I'm almost finished with my egg. Okay, let me finish here.

I'm an adult woman.

I'm Bertie. No Ys.

I'm busy this whole weekend with Yeast Week.

I'm cheating on my wife!

I'm coming to find you, Bertie!

I'm confused.

I'm doing a normal amount of work at a reasonable speed.

I'm dying of dysentery, and the only cure is...

I'm Ebony Black of the CSBC,

I'm expanding my reach and tightening my grasp.

I'm fine! [chuckles]  Completely fine.

I'm fine.

I'm fine. Let let's change the subject.

I'm freaking out! We've been here forever!

I'm getting really hot. [cries]

I'm going back to work on the house.

I'm going home!

I'm going to allow this because the traffic heading back

I'm going to exercise, maybe learn a new dance move,

I'm going to start working at a bakery a few days a week.

I'm gonna eat chips for lunch.

I'm gonna fix this, Speckle. Freeze right there.

I'm gonna go get dressed. Don't talk about me while I'm gone!

I'm gonna judge a little.

I'm gonna kill him.

I'm gonna stab that dough

I'm good! I love takin' up space.

I'm good.

I'm happy to teach you.

I'm having an affair with six others,

I'm here for my apprenticeship.

I'm here.

I'm just confused because he was betrothed to Lady Trottington,

I'm just gonna go there and rip off the Band Aid.

I'm just lonely.

I'm just picking out some decor for my new place.

I'm just standing here, learning some facts.

I'm nominating you for an Archie Award!

I'm not allowed to whoop at the deli anymore.

I'm not sure.

I'm not trained to handle this many items!

I'm not trying to...

I'm officially the worst at being in a relationship.

I'm only doing this because I refuse to live off my auntie anymore.

I'm opening a new patisserie, and I want you to manage it.

I'm out here helping people!  Gotta go! [pants]

I'm pretty sure his top choices are me and Dirk.

I'm pretty sure you said to come right

I'm probably fired?

I'm ready to break out and step the shit up!

I'm really excited for you and Speckle.

I'm recording this on my phone in case there's a trial.

I'm so glad I came over to visit Jaggy,

I'm so glad I was baked into a cake

I'm so sorry I didn't answer your calls.

I'm so sorry.

I'm so tired of feeling scared

I'm so worried I ruined everything with Speckle.

I'm sorry I made it weird.

I'm sorry I pushed you so hard.

I'm sorry she's blue!

I'm sorry, phone.

I'm sorry. Maybe that's dumb.

I'm starved. Could you feed me some fresh files?

I'm staying home!

I'm still unsure of your tone, but thank you!

I'm sure Holland will give you whatever you ask for. [chuckles]

I'm sure they'd appreciate you reaching out.

I'm talking about waterfowl.

I'm telling you, you gotta try those sweet, crusty crunts.

I'm the picture of productivity,

I'm thinking, uh, trophy hunting, being on coins,

I'm too heavy with apps!

I'm trapped between the worlds of the living and the dead,

I'm unfocused, irresponsible, a moocher.

I'm working to perfect the process of making a roux from bananas.

I'm, uh, sorry, ladies, but we've been receiving a lot of complaints today.

I'm, uh, taking a gap year from Foreign University.

I's fine. I's Tuca.

I've always thought, "This is just who I am."

I've always wanted to ask you, what happened?

I've been afraid to listen to you and accept that I'm all of those things.

I've been calling him "Deli Guy" all night.

I've been dealing with some negative juju lately.

I've been here way longer than ten minutes, okay?

I've been programmed to comfort you.

I've been so ashamed the last couple days, but right now, I feel strong.

I've been so caught up in my own issues. Forgive me?

I've been sober for six months.

I've been thinking a lot about what you said, and

I've been told it's off putting when I silently stare.

I've been working next to you at the bakery for months.

I've changed. [burps]

I've definitely got some cool ideas, too, in terms of my own ideas, yeah.

I've done the market research. Ka pow!

I've fallen ill this early morn..."

I've had trouble trusting people.

I've heard of that!

I've longed for this moment for 15 long winters

I've never not been drunk on a date before.

I've wanted to do this for so long.

If a restaurant has too many options, I end up ordering napkins.

If Bertie's croissants are better than yours,

If he can't be faithful to his wife,

If I don't do it, who will?

If I put them together, they'll work twice as good.

If I try to find medicine by myself, who knows what I'll come back with!

If I'm so brave, why don't I go home and deal with my shit?

If we double down, ba ba boom, on media ad sales,

If you do, he should keep his muddy work boots outside

If you don't wanna live with me anymore, I understand.

If you look closely, you can catch some sexual overtones in her work.

If you make a mistake, no big deal. I'll take the hit if I have to.

If you weren't my own daughter, I'd fire your ass right now!

If you win, you'll get that sugar bowl.

If you'll help me get started, we can totally make this bakery a reality.

If your breakfast cabbage gets cold...

Improving morale. Bye!

In a way, our relationship transcends mobile technology.

In fact, I've been ignoring my shit all day, goofing off with you two.

In front of a huge audience!

In love with him? I don't even know his name.

In my day, a woman was expected to put out some effort.

In my head, I'm married to three random strangers,

In our joint checking account.

In public!

In rhapsodic symmetry with...

In the infinite battle between nature and nurture,

In their long term cohabitation

In this climate? [laughs]

In your bedroom.

Including my relationship with my boyfriend.

Instead of popping zits, now you're filling them.

Interesting!

Interesting. Very interesting.

Invite her out tomorrow.

Irregardless, how many sex bugs medications

Is equally at home in front of the camera or behind it,

Is it heated?

Is it my Auntie Tallulah or is it a squashed up roly poly getting a massage?

Is she okay?

Is that a man I smell with you

Is that correct, sir?

Is that woman nudging you? What nudgery is this?

Is there, like, a baby carrot I could start with?

Is this helping?

Is this how you live without me?

Is Tuca okay?

Ish!

Isn't that your job?

It all kind of fell apart after she died.

It increases property value.

It is a pleasure to meet you, Tallulah.

It is? Oh, okay.

It looks like you're engaging in your first transaction.

It means I'm sick of you undermining me.

It means that sugar bowl was important to me.

It must have taken forever to master it.

It seems there's nowhere to go but up for this one of a kind fashion icon.

It should be more fitting.

It should be under "Roberta Songthrush."

It should hug but never pinch.

It took me ten years to learn how to make it.

It was a sex bug bush, the one on Sex Bug Lane.

It was beach front, Mom!

It was inappropriate!

It was only a seven hour drive.

It was Speckle's and it's precious, and... Oh, God, Tuca. I really fudged things up.

It wasn't my first choice, but Big Hairy Stallion68 was taken.

It'll be a ten minute trip, tops.

It's "cunt," Bertie! Scream it loud, scream it proud!

It's a show about a bird who plays hooky from work.

It's a spoon size joke.

It's a story as old as time.

It's a wonder any of you survived at all.

It's about the building of desire, the longing, the passion.

It's actually been nice not having any distractions.

It's almost ready.

It's almost ready. Smell.

It's called "Mr. Straw Rasp's Bountiful Bouncing Berry Stand"!

It's cool to wait in line for a change.

It's croissants and Bundt cake.

It's dangerous.

It's driving me crazy that I can't remember it.

It's easy! Just do what they do on Judge Sparrow.

It's fun to daydream,

It's getting weird in here. [echoing]

It's her birthday.

It's inappropriate!

It's just a mild cramp. Check it out.

It's just gonna be way more expensive.

It's just nice to know someone out there cares about me.

It's just part of the job and how he teaches.

It's just...

It's just... I can't quite put my finger on it.

It's just... sometimes I feel like it's a man's world

It's like a... like a goddamn mooseknuckle express train!

It's like bubble wrap but made out of skin.

It's like I know exactly what's gonna happen later.

It's made of a very thin, toothsome wafer with sugar ink.

It's me, Baker Barb!

It's me, Speckle.

It's me, your boyfriend. I'm moving in.

It's midnight.

It's milled wood, I believe.

It's no wonder you turned out the way you did.

It's not a day off!

It's not their fault!

It's okay. [exhales]

It's okay. I'm glad I called. [exhales]

It's okay. You fought with honor.

It's okay. You're so brave to tell me this.

It's only 6:30.

It's only a matter of time.

It's rewarding work. I'm pretty good at it.

It's sent. Let's go!

It's so forced!

It's so weird that you're not answering your phone.

It's time to go to the amusement park.

It's to another turtle!

It's too dark in there.

It's too mean.

It's twisted up in your ovaries real good.

It's using statistics to optimize marketing decisions for long term growth.

It's very uncomfortable, but I can't return it!

It's what DJ Parkour would have wanted?

It's you.

It's your first time up there since you stopped drinking.

It's, like, whatever, you know? [chuckles]

Jaggy! JJ! J money!

Jaguar, stop!

Jeez, in that case, I could have gotten them from anyone!

Jeff, wow, uh... [chuckles] that's a good one.

Jeremy, I swear to God!

Jewell, I see you've got something already.

Juicing is not the same as blending!

Just a guy! And I'm ready to have fun. [chuckles]

Just a second, sir.

Just be a normal, confident toucan woman with strong legs.

Just be that wild, impulsive, very scary at times Tuca.

Just because I don't have a boring office job like you

Just because our loan is 30 years

Just call me "Bertie."

Just drink my drink and help me pretend everything is normal, okay?

Just follow me.

Just got your very brief email and wanted to check in.

Just hit him with that confident Tuca swagger.

Just hold on a few more minutes. Don't dump me!

Just imagine.

Just kidding! It was quite upsetting.

Just kidding. It looked awful!

Just kidding. It was for love.

Just let me live! [panting]

Just like it does with bread!

Just measuring the scream space. Looking good.

Just say something like...

Just show me what kind of porn you'd normally click on.

Just ten actual minutes, I promise!

Just the responsible amount, which is one... thing of medication.

Just to let him feel the heat when I cook him.

Just working hard.

Ka kaaaw!

Ka kaw!

Ka kaw!

Ka kaw! [laughs] Kaw!

Keep the coffee hot for me." Ha ha!

Kids, you just lose interest sometimes.

Kinda busy with a customer right now,

Kisses!

Kree, koo, koo! Kree, koo, koo! [laughs]

Ladies and gentle birds and plants, humans,

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my friend used poor judgment,

Ladies... [blows whistle] come at me.

Lady Bertie, the Nests of Netherfield will keep us apart no more.

Last week, her boyfriend ate his own grandma.

Last week, you didn't wanna go outside.

Lean? [scoffs]

Leave me alone.

Leonardo, be careful!

Let me ask you, if we wanted to sell bananas, would that be okay?

Let me just finish this email to my boss. Hey!

Let me just plug this in right here. [grunts]

Let me know if you need any help, anytime.

Let me see what I can find.

Let me show you how to do the chouquettes.

Let me show you our longer lifespan animals.

Let's change the subject.

Let's get Bertie moved into that empty office space today.

Let's get the ball rolling on our marketing strategy for the next month.

Let's just get a little contour going.

Let's loop it and scoop it!

Let's not forget the time your cut off jorts

Let's not get into a mob mentality here.

Let's practice some different responses to catcalls, huh?

Let's rein it in. Maybe we should switch to beer.

Let's see, I'll put on my good walking shoes.

Let's see, it only has my toothbrush, my daily medication

Let's see. Where to start?

Let's talk marketing strategy.

Let's watch a movie!

Life is like a river with big rocks in it.

Life lesson, kiddo!

Life lesson: nothing belongs to anyone!

Like a Tuca ten or a real ten minutes?

Like flowers in the desert or rain on a cloudless day,

Like how you can't keep a job?

Like I need a giant hawk to shit in my mouth.

Like jokes! [laughs]

Like Pastry Pete?

Like we all have at some point in our lives.

Like when you got us kicked out of Anita's wedding

Like, I can collect your mail

Like, I'm actually interested in the words coming out of your beak.

Like, what if there's a giant monster crab down there, waiting to pinch my butt?

Like, what if you could keep cold cuts in a desk drawer? [chuckles]

Listen, we've been friends

Listen. You have to come with me to the store.

Live and on an Internet stream!

Look around and get rid of anything that isn't useful to you.

Look at all these orders! Oh, we're gonna need some help!

Look at this somewhat spacious kitchen

Look close: the female song thrush ripe with anticipation.

Look how mean you made me be!

Look, I bought some decorations at a gas station.

Look, I have a third boob!

Look, I have three boobs.

Look, I know you've been under a lot of pressure

Look, I made her a sweet tire swing.

Look, I stayed here to make sure you're okay.

Look, I'd like to be a senior operations analyst.

Look, Pastry Pete's an asshole,

Look, this was... This was great, but everything isn't fixed between us.

Look! Bertie, it's the biker!

Look. "Bees have adapted to survive on pastries."

Looking cool, Draca. Ha ha!

Looking like a whole snack out here.

Love these maple floors.

Love you.

Luckily for Tuca,

Luckily, I spotted an oddly inviting bush.

Lunch is fun now!

Made out of regular ingredients, not dead people.

Make any idea beautiful online with over 30 identical templates.

Make sure not to eat that card.

Mama, don't worry!

Man, I love addressing all of your concerns.

Many have tried and failed the following technique.

Maxwell, you're no longer the bad boy of architecture!

May it become the newest food fad that everyone loves

Maybe "warm potato"?

Maybe Baker Beth was right.

Maybe Frog Town, or Horseville, or San Francisco, California.

Maybe I could pick your brain later.

Maybe I should record myself and post it on the Internet!

Maybe just pick up the box and then, like, take it?

Maybe our relationship has some holes, but there's a good foundation there...

Maybe she could use the guidance of a cool bird lady like you.

Maybe snacks are responsible for those thick ass legs.

Maybe some women are body positive, but hmm mmm mmm, not me!

Maybe someday he'll throw you on the back of his motorcycle,

Maybe someday, but right now, the thought of planning a wedding is like, bleh!

Maybe something like... bend over, you little tart.

Maybe that's the pizza I ordered.

Maybe this was just a lot to jump into, huh?

Maybe we can just do it the usual way tonight?

Maybe we could advertise to, like, hawks, too?

Maybe we need a break.  [breathes deeply]

Maybe we're just growing apart.

Maybe you didn't break up so much as grow up.

Maybe you'll think about that before you go shucking a whole field of corn

Mayhaps, if you first indulge me my tale of woe.

Me and Bertie are always doing fun stuff.

Me neither.

Me, too.

Me. All alone! Solo!

Medicine math!

Mickey, care to demonstrate?

Milled wood! Might as well be mildew wood.

Mirror sales are down here at Mean Mirror Incorporated,

Mm hmm, an IPA with an aggressively masculine label.

Mm hmm?

Mm hmm.

Mm hmm.

Mm hmm.

Mm hmm.

Mm hmm. And for "jaguar," you listed "jaguar."

Mm hmm. Okay.

Mm mmm.

Mm, Bertie, you're getting better and better at baking, I swear.

Mm, girl, I love your tibias and fibulas.

Mm, it's silly, but for me,

Mm, mm.

Mm, no, that's too sexy.

Mm, okay, Jewell, we still need to work on responding to unwanted attacks.

Mm, that is a great feature.

Mm.

Mm. Mm hmm.

Mm...

Mmm, but the more I think about it, didn't that kitchen look small to you?

Mmm, okay, I guess I can use ten.

Mmm!

Mmm! Must be jam 'cause jelly don't shake like that.

Mmm! This is amazing!

Mmm.

Mmm.

Mmm. Let's see. Very croissant y.

Mmm... I keep thinking about Tuca.

Mobile notary, fortune teller, unlicensed tour guide, dog walker,

Mom! You can just introduce me as Sophie.

More bureaucracy than I anticipated, though.

More sex bugs, probably.

Mostly me, because I'm mad at you.

Mouthwash. Fertilizer.

Ms. Toucan, where was this aforementioned bush?

Mum, I'll eat it later!

Mum!

Mwah! Templates!

Mwah.

My ass is what? Girl, you crazy.

My aunt was mixed with paprika, if you know what I mean.

My beautiful beak!

My best friend, Bertie, always likes my editorializing.

My boob ran away!

My dreams aren't weird, and I don't have any fears of commitment.

My even lovelier drones!

My first ever girlfriend dumped me, and I'm just looking for some company.

My freaking beak itches!

My Grandmother Robin. That was her sugar bowl.

My gumbo was mixed with sage because he was wise.

My hunger restores as I am fed, and I will never be sated!

My life has fallen into kind of a routine.

My medicine is working,

My mom raised all of us kids by herself.

My mother was a glove girl at Featherton's department store.

My name's Dakota with a Y! It's silent and invisible.

My nephew is a perfect angel.

My only regret is not doing it sooner.

My sweet baby!

Nah, I'm good.

Nah, she's fine. I bet she's happy to have a space to herself

Nah, that's just your worry wart flapping its warty mouth again.

Nah! Let's just jump right into it.

Nah.

Need a hand up here.

Neighbors are constantly borrowing cups of sugar.

Netherfield 2.

Never mind.

News flash: birds lay eggs, not bullshit!

Next up on British Bird Channel, we have a bit of a chat on our talk show,

Nice name.

Nice surprise entrance.

Nice tits, but I don't know what your deal is.

Nice. A talking hole!

No big deal. Nothing's ruined.

No career, no man.

No need to get upset.

No one can take over your responsibilities.

No one's ever supposed to go in there.

No one's going anywhere.

No problem.

No way, Tookles.

No way!

No worries, I'm taking care of everything, like I always do.

No, I'm good. Thanks, Rick.

No, I'm not, you creep!

No, I'm purchasing consumer goods...

No, it was just pretend.

No, it's just... look at this place.

No, it's...

No, just a lot of yelling, some nudity,

No, no, no, no, no, no!

No, no, no! All of these actors are too handsome!

No, she likes you.

No, that was crunts, a combo of crullers and Bundt cake.

No, that's not it.

No, we really like them.

No, you're making that face you make when you think I'm being a dick.

No, you're not getting it! I think I just want to be surprised.

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No! Absolutely no!

No! Dirk's a boob spooker!

No! Ditch it and hang with your pal Tuca!

No! I didn't mean

No! It's not about the peck.

No! My holes!

No! Tell my husband I never loved him.

No! The window!

No! Who'd you give it to?

No! Why not?

No.

No.

No.

No. No! Oh, um, I have to go.

No. Uh, not exactly.

No. Uh, well, yes.

No. Well, kind of.

No... Yes!

Nobody's here to listen to my great songs

None of her bills are set up for automatic payment.

Nope!

Nope!

Nope.

Normally I'd say, "Girl, you look like you want someone to snack on your feet."

Normally, I'd never say this about a woman,

Not as dope, but very helpful.

Not bad for this messy bish!

Not bad. Above average. Pretty good.

Not because I'm upset, but because I also have my shit together.

Not necessary.

Not to mention the company videographer, several foreign investors,

Not today, dude.

Not your fault, baby. You were cursed with those big legs.

Nothing sexual is happening.

Nothing to worry about.

Notice how easily the ground turns over for digging, or gardening,

Now all she talks about is Irish butter.

Now I can't hang up my pictures, there's no room for my stuff,

Now I feel so exposed. I don't know how to be.

Now I get to make the big, weird decisions, okay?

Now I'll never be an actor with humble beginnings!

Now is the time to share.

Now let's loop it and scoop it!

Now the electricity is safely inside the electricity tubes.

Now we don't have to use our phones. [chuckles]

Now, how would I write if I was puking?

Now, I may just be a big time city slicker with a fancy college degree...

Now, if we get kissed without consent, maybe with a little bit of tongue,

Now, it's their turn to question you, and I'm sure she's gonna be tough,

Now, let me know if you wanna jazz things up in there.

Now, Speckle, please eat me.

Now, the first step is the most painstaking.

Now, you'll wanna swap these ice packs out twice a day for fresh ones

Now? During actual business hours?

O kay.

Objection! This is mildly interesting at best!

Of Bird War II fighter planes

Of course I am. I'll always be here for you.

Of course, Draca only sends those who truly seek enlightenment.

Of course! Wonderful.

Of my work schedule, and I'm not sure why I'm still yelling!

Of the Bird Town Bartholomews.

Oh ho!

Oh ho! You need the Worry Vacuum!

Oh, actually, I lent it to Tuca.

Oh, are we cuddling? Uh, that seems nice.

Oh, Auntie, you're always all about that bosom.

Oh, bananas!

Oh, Bertie, how I love seeing my world through your sweet, innocent eyes!

Oh, Bertie.

Oh, boy, did I ever use it.

Oh, boy, I loves me some bird watching!

Oh, come on, Jaggy. You know you love it. It's strangely satisfying.

Oh, Daddy, relax!

Oh, dear, I made a hundred eggs before I thought one was adequate.

Oh, dear!

Oh, dear.

Oh, dear. I'm standing on the ceiling.

Oh, fine! Whatever you want.

Oh, Gamby, you're actually really delicious.

Oh, girl, you nasty.

Oh, God, Speckle. I'm sorry I gave your sugar away.

Oh, God!  [groans]

Oh, gosh! Sorry!

Oh, great first try. We'll make another after dinner.

Oh, he died 10 years ago. Sweet little ass.

Oh, he's cute. Lucky you.

Oh, hey! I didn't pay my cable bill and my acquaintance Ryan is on Bird Court.

Oh, hey! Now we can do all kinds of neighbor stuff.

Oh, hey. HR Lady!

Oh, hey. There you are!

Oh, hey. You guys found the pastries I made last night.

Oh, huh, so free. Uh, thank you.

Oh, I also have a full time office job.

Oh, I don't deliver.

Oh, I don't wanna mess up, you know?

Oh, I get it.

Oh, I just lent it to the plant lady who lives across from me.

Oh, I see what this is about. You don't think I can take care of myself.

Oh, I'll get to it.

Oh, jeez.

Oh, man, I just saw her a few months ago.

Oh, man, really?

Oh, man, we've been through so much.

Oh, man, you pulverized that precious penguin ego!

Oh, man! I'm sorry, but that was hilarious.

Oh, my God, I can't believe it's you!

Oh, my God, she is so cool. I can't believe you talked to her.

Oh, my God, that's delicious.

Oh, my God, you live so far away from me now.

Oh, my God, you're right! I've been so thoughtless.

Oh, my God! Oh, no!

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God!

Oh, my God. The northwest corner of

Oh, my gosh, thank you! I actually think you can!

Oh, my! This isn't what I wanted at all!

Oh, never mind. I gotta run to a meeting in a minute.

Oh, no, is it her birthday again?

Oh, no, that's the worst kind of disappointed

Oh, no, this shit looks exactly like my dream!

Oh, no, you don't!

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

Oh, no! [laughs]

Oh, no! An obstacle!

Oh, no! Game over.

Oh, no! Game over.

Oh, no! I'm sinking!

Oh, no! I'm so sorry, Chef!

Oh, no! That's today!

Oh, no. I mean, I thought about it,

Oh, no. My cactus passed away.

Oh, nothing.

Oh, okay. [chuckles]

Oh, oops. [chuckles]

Oh, please, you're an adult now. Call me Coach Meredith.

Oh, shit, now we off again. How the piss did this happen?

Oh, shit.

Oh, shoot. Ye yeah, I remember.

Oh, six whole months this time.

Oh, so close!

Oh, sorry!

Oh, sorry. I thought we were just listing stuff.

Oh, Speckle is gonna hate me.

Oh, Speckle, is that you?

Oh, Speckle, my boy! My dearest grand peep.

Oh, sure. Sure, sure.

Oh, thank you.

Oh, thanks. [coughs]

Oh, that is really specific.

Oh, that's right.

Oh, That's So Edward.

Oh, that's too bad. The lakes are so jiggly this time of year.

Oh, these? It's just...

Oh, they give degrees to dropouts now?

Oh, they're just two other temp workers I found around the office.

Oh, Tuca.

Oh, Tuca...

Oh, Tuca...

Oh, uh, no. Remember the last time when you

Oh, we're playing boring people now?

Oh, well, why don't you check your ChoreGoose app and do some gigs?

Oh, well, you don't have to leave every

Oh, who are you? Mmm!

Oh, woe, my sweetest Henry!

Oh, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof.

Oh, wow!

Oh, yeah, it was.

Oh, yeah, so fragrant.

Oh, yeah! I really wrecked that 'let.

Oh, yeah! I'm gonna go brush my teeth real quick.

Oh, yeah! Like Big B to the T!

Oh, yeah? Is that why you wore that tight sweater today?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. The sugar. Right.

Oh, you haven't spoken to her since we signed our mortgage...

Oh, you really putting me in a package with this deli guy.

Oh, you want me to be the little spoon?

Oh, you want me to think you're good,

Oh, you were always such a strong swimmer.

Oh, you'll be back when you've sobered up and realize what you've done.

Oh, you're good.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh! [gasps] [laughs]

Oh! I think we have one more thing you'd like to borrow.

Oh! I thought the flash was off! I thought the flash was off!

Oh! That tickles the soul, doesn't it?

Oh! That's the realtor right now. Exciting!

Oh! There you are, glasses empty and woefully underdressed.

Oh! This place is so nice and clean.

Oh! Uh... [clears throat]

Oh! Where did Tuca go?

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh. [chuckles awkwardly]

Oh. Fuck, yeah!

Oh. Hey, babies!

Oh. It's, uh, a photo of your own face.

Oh. Okay! Where is that?

Oh. That fucker!

Oh. Then can I just get those six scoops?

Oh. Uh?

Oh. Uh...

Okay, Bertie.  [exhales] Calm down.

Okay, better not.

Okay, but can I make one more egg before we leave?

Okay, but don't take too long because I really need to get back home ASAP.

Okay, but I might come back in to buy an éclair!

Okay, but it's just a pile of peanuts up there.

Okay, bye, sweetie.

Okay, don't mind if I do!

Okay, go relax. I'll come to bed in a little bit.

Okay, hi.

Okay, I need to stop pausing this podcast to sing.

Okay, I'll bounce so you can get all mushy.

Okay, I'll say it. You have too many turtles.

Okay, I'll unpack that later.

Okay, just get in on the moment, Joyce.

Okay, let me put this as sensitively as I can.

Okay, let's cut the crap and head to my Auntie Tallulah's house

Okay, let's cut the shit. I need you to plug in my wife.

Okay, okay, I... I think I have something you might like.

Okay, read it back to me. [chuckles]

Okay, that's it. I think we're all done.

Okay, this is kind of nice.

Okay, Tuca, be cool.

Okay, Tuca, this is not cute.

Okay, Tuca, time to get your shits in a row.

Okay, well, I looked over more of my data, and I, um...

Okay, well, it's just kinda taking up some space here, so

Okay, who here can tell me

Okay, yeah. That's still me.

Okay?

Okay? I called in sick because I knew I couldn't handle anything today,

Okay.

Okay. Anything new today?

Okay. But don't stay up all night watching car crash videos.

Okay. Call me back.

Okay. Uh, let's see.

On a loop! Loop it so I can scoop it!

On their Helpful Communication Map when we get home.

Once your loan is approved, you'll be one step closer to home ownership.

One has extra bones?

One night, when everyone's laughing and talking,

One of the benefits of living farther from the city.

One winter, St. Oriole decided he'd rather stay home than migrate.

One, two, three, go!

Oof! [huffs]

Oof! I haven't gone to work in, like, a week.

Ooh, Bertie, we have to play one of these old ass games.

Ooh, fun!

Ooh, fun! Looks like some kind of open world video game.

Ooh, nice grocery store fort.

Ooh, pickle?

Ooh, pins and needles! Don't touch me. Don't touch me right now.

Ooh, sorry to spook you.

Ooh, sorry, Isaiah! I got a new husband now!

Ooh, that looks real bad.

Ooh, this place looks perfect. We'll take it!

Ooh, yeah, right there.

Ooh, you mean, like, role play?

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ooh! Declarative and rolls off the tongue. I like it.

Ooh! I can borrow a cup of sugar.

Ooh! I can't believe I'm gonna get paid to get horny folks off... virtually.

Ooh! It's so wooden and loggy!

Ooh! Never mind, I'll just drink the whole bottle.

Ooh! They're ready!

Ooh! We get to see her house!

Ooh! What a rush!

Ooh! Why don't you let me install a fireman's pole in the ceiling

Ooh! Woo hoo hoo!

Ooh.

Ooh.

Ooh.

Oops! [chuckles]

Oops! Too easily.

Oops. Too much.

Open your mouth, Bertie.

Operation Small Talk with the Boss has begun.

Or all your clothes are really gonna stink.

Or as I like to call it, "A case of the Berties."

Or at least I was until that dorky Dakota showed up.

Or at least she was.

Or build our dream home from scratch.

Or CON. Yeah, CON is good.

Or else I would've never known you're a world famous dermatologist.

Or he put a camera in the pipes?

Or if the voicemail was still recording.

Or just your own sweaty, unadulterated musk?

Or like a road with, like, deep potholes.

Or maybe a new nickname.

Or sexually.

Or she had one, and they had a sad but inevitable blow up.

Or that cab driver on spring break.

Or wait! Maybe the amusement park.

Or we can call it "Congregation Under Loud Things."

Or what you did with that lead singer from Molted Feathers.

Or, as we say in the sandwich biz, fine bánh mi. [chuckles]

Or, in my case, an early grave.

Or... you, me, and Speckle can go to the movies.

Oral History of Oral Orioles and Areolas is a quick read.

Order order, gavel gavel,

Organic fruit is supposed to give off a strong, biological fragrance.

Our lifeguard was there every summer.

Our melons are not expired.

Our trademark pastry will be sweet rolls filled with lemon cream.

Our warm home together.

Our Wootus meetings can help with that.

OvalSpace.

Oven fries!

Over the shallow grave where the girl is buried

Overruled, but, Sophie, get to it.

Ow trageous!

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow! Bertie, don't do it! It hurts too much!

Ow! My side.

Paging Dr. Garlic!

Passion awaits in a faraway land."

Passion fruit nectar, champagne, and a splash of ginger beer.

Pastry Pete always does this shit. Let me guess.

Pastry Pete invited me to an exclusive dinner,

Pastry Pete is so brilliant.

Pastry Pete wants me to perform it for a demo at Yeast Week!

Pastry Pete, thank you so much, but I have a kind of family emergency.

Pat, it's time for dinner.

Perfect for a lobby trampoline or foyer catapult.

Pests in my nest! Cooties in my culottes!

Phew!

Pins and needles! My gamby is a cake now?

Please come home with us! You'll die if you stay here.

Please get this idiot home safe!

Please think about it?

Please, plug her in before

Plus, I just got a promotion.

Plus, I spoke in public

Plus, sometimes open houses have free cookies.

Plus, the bathroom stinks,

Plus, they always gang up on me and make fun of how messy my apartment is.

Plus, your aunt's house got Speckle all horned up.

Positivity and love, huh?

Possible title ideas for my inevitable memoir.

Pretty wild for a Tuesday, Cindy.

Pricktina, baby girl, just tell me what you need.

Put them on the menu. We'll call them, uh, "Pastry Pete's Family Specialty."

Put this in your pants.

Quick, step out the door where you'll be surprised."

Quiet! You have to fly pretty high to get one over on Judge Sparrow.

Really?

Remember how we used to bicker? Romantic.

Remember to bop your head with your arms to the beat!

Remember when I handed you some sugar and you rustled your leaves mysteriously?

Remember when we tried to sneak in last year?

Remember? I was the little spoon.

Reminder to all riders, please keep your hands, feet,

Rent a kitchen space!

Ridiculous. You're buying it.

Right now, there's nothing I'd rather do than go home, putter around, watch TV,

Right! The deli guy.

Roberta, that's enough water, dear.  [laughs]

Rotate those crops.

Rudeness saves the day yet again.

Ruin... ruin, ruin, ruin...

Running late, running late.

Scared of heights, scared of heights. Don't fall, don't fall.

See you on the other side, my love!

See, if we remove the bushes here, and we expand the patio here...

See, nowadays, everybody's just got it hanging out 24/17.

See? All fixed.

See? I think so, too!

Select a pair of wings."

Seriously, Tuca? Another night partying?

Several bigwigs, a fat cat, three movers, and a shaker.

Sex bugs!

Sex bugs! Sex bugs!

She asked!

She calls it "Tummy Trouble."

She connected two unrelated things!

She could get it.

She doesn't mean it.

She is a reckless driver.

She just needs 16 orders of meat dumplings every two hours.

She makes cool things,

She married and divorced a couple of rich tycoons,

She must be high on life.

She must not have a best friend.

She recently flunked out of business school,

She'll be fine if we move out.

She's amazing! I wish she were my daughter.

She's been at this all day. She's just...

She's broken through the glass ceiling and left it in bloody shards

She's fine. She'll get a second wind.

She's just going to confer with some colleagues and check

She's just mad  'cause I spent all of the money

She's right over there.

She's stable for now.

She's still in surgery. The doctors say all we can do is wait.

She's swimming to it! Bertie! Bird Jelly!

She's welcome to visit anytime.

Sheesh! Relax about the box.

Shh, my lady.

Shh!

Shh!

Shh.

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!

Shit, that's cool.

Shit, that's good advice.

Shit, this beak concealer is powerful.

Shit!

Shit. He's onto us. Act normal.

Shoot, I should've brought the matches.

Shoot. How are we going to deliver these on time?

Should a person or that person's friends be exterminated over poor judgment?

Shut up, computer. Don't tell me how to doink!

Shut up, hypothalamus, you dirty lobe humper.

Side of meatballs. Great choice, Sarah.

Siete y dos.

Signed, Dapper T. Dog, Fervent Citizen Velocipede."

Since I have to take the stupid slow bus all the way up to the Beakshires.

Since you got that promotion,

Sincerely, Dapper T. Dog, City Velociraptor."

Sir, this is the express lane!

Six, seven... 49, 50 Fine, we're going to the cabin!

So brave!

So exciting! Ah!

So flighty and irresponsible.

So get out of my space or I'll break yo' face!

So humiliating!

So hung over. [groans]

So I can handle your candle?

So I can have a party down here?

So I can slide down anytime?

So I could say a proper goodbye and tell you I'm proud of you.

So I don't have to be reminded of you

So I got scared and told him to stop.

So I urge you to repair Bird Town's concrete crevices posthaste!

So I'm gonna keep talking if that's cool with you.

So I'm gonna let you rest.

So many good memories there.

So needy.

So sorry to miss the big presentation, but feel free to carry on without me.

So sorry.

So young, so many questionable decisions.

So, a "no" to the doing it?

So, how'd your aunt afford a house in the Beakshires?

So, I told the emir, "I can Dubai my own drink,

So, let's get into it.

So, maybe the giant sex bugs are my fault.

So, no big deal, but turns out we need that sug' back.

So, that's how I got those bugs, bush to bush contact.

So, this is really permanent?

So, um, call me back so we can talk about it, okay?

So, we shall have a croissant tournament.

So, we're bringing that up? Because I can bring up things, too.

So, when do you wanna come over to get your things?

So, where did all the cold cuts come from?

So, why are we going to open houses today?

So, you just stop!

So, you probably don't need a coffee with that muffin. [laughs uncomfortably]

So, you want me to ignore you for 15 years,

So, you're just gonna hope your boss remembers you exist, reads your mind,

So... [sniffles] The only reason I haven't gotten the promotion is...

So... I'm not a lawyer.

Some have asked, why bring them together?

Some people can't handle the rigors of this job. [scoffs]

Somebody stop this woman. She's on a rampage!

Somebody's getting another sticker

Someone get me down from here!

Someone put me in a corset and pull it tight until my lungs explode.

Something weird is going on here. I guess we can

Sometimes I need you to be my rock!

Sometimes making a big decision feels like closing a door.

Sometimes there are no winners.

Sorry about your leg, Connie.

Sorry I can't go with you today. Are you gonna be okay with your auntie?

Sorry I didn't call the other night. Auntie Tallulah's in the hospital.

Sorry I'm 30 minutes late.

Sorry I'm late. [chuckles]

Sorry, uh, there's very limited space here.

Sorry, we only have six scoops available.

Sorry.

Speckle will come home,

Speckle will say they're creepy, but we'll ignore him.

Speckle, come here. She can hear us through the hole.

Speckle, how did you tame that jaguar?

Speckle, I almost have the sugar back.

Speckle, I did so well at the presentation and everyone said

Speckle, I'm sorry we lost that house.

Speckle, my butt's showing!

Speckle, watch out!

Speckle, where are your pants?

Speckle, you've done it again!

Speckle, your face makes me feel like everything's gonna be okay.

Speckle! You're here!

Speckle?

Speckle?

Spencer didn't even deserve you.

Spicy chips.

Spread on, sitster!

Standard.

Stay in there so you can see the color change.

Stay in there.

Staying inside is the best thing for me today.

Step two, why Bertie should be allowed to have a boy girl slumber party.

Step Up 2 the Nests.

Stocking up on food and supplies, reinforcing his nest,

Stop talking!

Stop! What did we say about buggy back riding?

Stopping you from just living your goddamn life?

Strangers, you're about to get Tuca'd!

Strong legs!

Stupid toucan!

Stupid, probably. I don't know. I've never been there. Forget about it.

Stupid. I love it.

Sturdy Bertie, I saw you swim to that island.

Suck my cerebrum!

Support women owned businesses! Buy treats from Sweet Beak!

Sure, a stranger just spit in my mouth, but it was charming in a metropolitan way.

Sure, sure, I'll come get it later.

Sure. You wanna talk it out or, like, choose a safe word first?

Surely, this is in jest. [chuckles]

Surprise!

Surprises abound.

Sustained.

Sweetie, could you help me change my diaper?

Swing left, then swing right.

Talk pastry, complain about lesser bakers,

Tell me! Tell me, woman!

Tell us what menopause is like!

Tell your Auntie Tookles all about it.

Text me when you get the good news, okay?

Thank you for saying that.

Thank you for your service.

Thank you very much!" [laughs]

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thanks for having me over in the dead of night.

Thanks for taking the time to teach me, Chef.

Thanks, buddy.

Thanks, Dirk.

Thanks, it'll probably take a while before it catches on, but, uh...

Thanks, sugar teats.

Thanks! Oh, I mean, sorry.

Thanks.

Thanks.

That "30 year fixed" stuff scared the shit out of me.

That I planted with some of you last week: our own personal mantras.

That is an outrageous accusation.

That is gross, and I am out of here.

That kitchen space is gonna need two new toilets after what I did.

That last one needs some work, but

That little dudette, however, is high on shrooms.

That looked fun! [laughs]

That plodding gait can only belong to my favorite niece, Tuca! [chuckles]

That reminds me.

That seems like a lot.

That sounds pretty bad. Maybe you should go see a doctor?

That top is too loose.

That was a nice little moment we had, huh?

That was a one time experiment. It's called "molecular gastronomy"!

That was amazing!

That was beautiful.

That was different. I don't even drink anymore.

That was fast.

That was just a one time thing I did twice.

That was my ice cream!

That was recently zoned as a historical landmark

That was so fun. We should do it again sometime.

That was so much fun. We should do it again sometime.

That was so much fun. We should do it again sometime.

That was some nice weather we had over the weekend, eh?

That will be $16.

That window doesn't look structurally sound.

That'd be tight! Hit me up, hit me up, hit me up!"

That's a buffer stall.

That's a huge and dangerous commitment!

That's a serious mental health issue.

That's a very generous offer that fits within the confines

That's actually what I came here to talk to you

That's beautiful, Bertie.

That's been my life approach so far, and it's worked... never times.

That's Chef Steele Laurent,

That's Chef Winter Garcia,

That's cool. You can keep her.

That's correct.

That's definitely not her sex moan.

That's disgusting!

That's funny.

That's great!

That's Greg. He's a bit of a handful.

That's how you think of me? As work?

That's it!

That's nice, Tuca.

That's not a euphemism.

That's okay, buddy. Here, wanna punch some dough?

That's okay.

That's okay.

That's okay.

That's our sugar. That brat stole it from us.

That's Peanut Butter Island.

That's pretty gooey, huh?

That's right, today is Self Care Saturday.

That's right, Unky Petey.

That's right! And it's a real piece of shit, too!

That's right! I heard it all through the talking vents!

That's right! It would be like you had your own bakery.

That's right! Okay, on to the next step.

That's so funny. These are my panic attack shoes.

That's the alarm that sounds

That's the Marmalade Sandbar. Total party zone.

That's what Bertie would have said. She's programmed to comfort me.

That's what I was trying to say when you kept talking about shitting.

That's what mirrors are for.

That's why I like them.

That's why we make a good team.

That's why you're being so weird.

The adulthood.

The air itself contains toxins which cloud us from our true selves.

The apartment is so quiet without you. And clean.

The architect was known for her sense of whimsy,

The bakery will be called "Sweet Beak."

The best bone farm has been growing bones...

The black tar potholes on Beak Street have become untenable!"

The board game that captures the mechanical intricacies

The comfort of these people in their homes with the birds they know best.

The crünt.

The Dapper Dog Story.

The day of the swim, I was at the dock really early,

The deli guy is so hot.

The department heads from other branches will be visiting.

The first chef to stuff a pickle into a biscuit!

The first pastry chef to put salt on a cookie!

The first seed of resentment has been planted.

The five of you running around barely supervised.

The further up we go, the less it all seems to matter.

The Jelly Lakes! Isn't that where your family has a cabin?

The middle stall? Seriously?

The more you practice.

The most dangerous yet adorable type of knife!

The most elite convergence of baking's boldest and brightest!

The mother!

The Nests of Netherfield!

The office manager asked me to do.

The old me would have partaken.

The one with the red banner!

The only thing that hasn't changed is the size of your schnoz.

The problem isn't our smelly melons, it's you.

The quadruple cabriole de crünt!

The sex bugs are big now, and it's not my fault!

The third wheel was an important addition to the sulky plow,

The timer doesn't start until we get to the store. Duh.

The truth is I got them from a bush!

The truth is, because of...

The vaulted ceilings!

The walls here are super thin. [grunts]

The Worry Vac is sucking all of your anxiety away!

Then give you a small peck on the beak?

Then he'll give me a peck on the beak,

Then how can we expect Tuca

Then how did you find out?

Then I'll demonstrate my leadership skills by speaking up in a meeting.

Then I'll eat him with a lot of unnecessary condiments.

Then I'll establish a rapport with my boss by nailing some small talk.

Then I'm going to a meeting for Women Taking Up Space.

Then it's missionary, quickie doggie, even quicker missionary.

Then tune in at tea and biscuits o'clock

Then we shan't waste a moment more.

Then you can just come over whenever you need anything in it.

Then you yelled your address and a very complicated pizza order.

Then, late one night, they'll come to life and take their revenge!

There are just a few more things we need to go over.

There are too many children's choirs singing stuff this time of year.

There it is!

There you are. You've got a lot of work to catch up on today.

There you go! Better?

There, there, little Ber titty.

There's a Girl Thingz here!

There's a reason I wasn't really into coming here.

There's meat in it. Surprise!

There's nothing standard about the killing of innocent creatures

These are crünts.

These are really good!

These make me feel safe.

These people are wigging me out.

They always call me on this day every year.

They always have fun rando trivia printed on the labels.

They are quite extreme. Excellent, Dirk.

They found St. Oriole dead.

They got the best doctors.

They have, like, two Ashby houses up there.

They might have a butterfly knife,

They're all gonna leave you!

They're like security blankets for our feet!

They're so cute!

They're so ugly! [screams]

They're spooky as shit!

They're teenagers, Bertie.

Things that have happened to me,

Things used to be so much fun.

Thirty years? Fixed?

This always happens when you're having a problem.

This can be my craft room where I'll make dolls by hand.

This child is a spoiled pile of soft serve assface.

This could be the master bedroom.

This dough is too wet.

This dude needs to stop reaching and grasping.

This exercise can be very triggering.

This has to be perfect for Yeast Week.

This house is a little farther out. I'll have to take the train to work.

This is a bad idea, Tuca!

This is a job for the real vacuum.

This is a standard procedure.

This is absurd!

This is an exercise designed to put you in the head space of the enemy...

This is better than staying home, anyways.

This is fun!

This is genuinely cool.

This is gonna be better than the time I popped out at the water park.

This is good to go. Mm hmm.

This is great cardio!

This is hopeless, Tuca. I don't see the sugar anywhere.

This is just a starter house.

This is lovely. I should make an egg of this moment.

This is my actual purse.

This is my curse!

This is my first time living with a boyfriend,

This is my wife, Pat.

This is Pastry Pete's turf.

This is real life.

This is so cool.

This is the end of an era, Tuca.

This is the most disgusting and disturbing thing I've ever

This is the most important part.

This is the Women Taking Up Space meeting, right?

This is what dealing with your shit looks like.

This is what we do. We drink, we banter.

This is where we shall introduce the baking world to my new crünt.

This is who I am now!

This isn't on you. This is on Pastry Pete.

This jaguar is ruining my shit!

This little piece of yellow is for us,

This mall used to be the most extreme place for teens to hang.

This might be my best freeze yet.

This never happens!

This pet is too much for me.

This place includes four professional grade ovens,

This place is legendary for not allowing flash photography.

This place is romantic.

This position just opened up at work, and the job is perfect for me!

This room could be a shared office.

This seems not good.

This shit is relentless!

This staircase goes all the way up to the attic!

This was my favorite place.

This whole sex bug fiasco helped me realize I can handle anything. [gasps]

This will be great. My EpiPen, smoke detector batteries,

This workshop doesn't work unless you reach deep inside of yourself

This, uh... It just needs to chill for a bit.

Those are really nice words, Bertie, but I just need some time.

Those crunts are putting six of them through college...

Those last 11 days and eight hours before my six month dry spell were nasty!

Time to celebrate with...

Title one:

To a certain exclusive dinner gathering for chefs.

To be next to your nest.

To display a kind gesture in this cruel, cold world."

To let people know there's a man in the house.

To someone else's booty hole?

To the CSBC headquarters is murderous this time of day,

To the point that people begin to resent it

To wait precisely two minutes after first contact

Today, I bring you something new:

Today, we thought we'd step back

Today's a great episode. We talked...

Today's episode is brought to you by OvalSpace.

Together forever!  [laughs]

Too delicious!

Took me hours to come up with that name.

Tookie, I'm never wearing pants again.

Toss his jacket on the couch, his keys will fall out, and he'll go, "Oops."

Totally ruined my summer vacation!

Traffic is clearing up.

Try holding it like this.

Tuca is online, courtesy of Bertie's Wi Fi password!

Tuca, are you getting junk off the street again?

Tuca, are you making your own medicine from that Dr. Garlic book again?

Tuca, can you stop kicking my seat?

Tuca, could you come and chat in my office for a moment?

Tuca, how were your gigs?

Tuca, I have to tell you something.

Tuca, I think I'm ready to go home now.

Tuca, I think we're all done with the violence!

Tuca, I'm worried about you.

Tuca, is everything okay?

Tuca, that was you!

Tuca, this rooster guy I work with is ruining my life today!

Tuca, what happened?

Tuca, you genius!

Tuca, you got a jaguar? Are you crazy?

Tuca, you should read the directions first.

Tuca, you're the loudest toucan I've ever chanced upon, and I adore you.

Tuca?

Tuca?

Tuca? Are you still in the hospital? 'Cause I'm in the waiting room.

Tuca? Hello?

Tuca? I need to talk to you.

Tuca's auntie lives in one of the Rhonda Padgett houses.

Typical rookie mistake.

Ugh, family!

Ugh, it's just a bunch of worms!

Ugh, my sister Terry always wants  to do a video phone call

Ugh, sorry!

Ugh, that's it!

Ugh!

Ugh!

Ugh!

Ugh!

Ugh! I completely misinterpreted all of your texts.

Ugh! I had a sex dream with lots of really beautiful pastries.

Ugh! I thought you were in love with him.

Ugh! Me died! Argh!

Ugh! Mom! This is girl time!

Ugh! She's wasting it!

Ugh! Why do I always write like this when I'm asking for a sick day?

Ugh! You're right, Bertie.

Ugh! You're right. Fine.

Ugh.

Ugh.

Ugh.

Ugh.

Ugh. Couldn't you have picked something simpler for this competition?

Ugh. Don't worry about what I said. I'm an idiot.

Ugh. Hmm...

Ugh. I'm so bored.

Ugh. I'm sorry. I I dropped my phone in a lake.

Ugh. It's dumb. I don't wanna talk about it.

Ugh. Okay, we need to get some X rays.

Ugh. Okay.

Ugh. The pipes in this building are trash. Y'all should think about moving.

Uh huh...

Uh oh. What are we gonna do?

Uh oh. You're getting that look you get whenever you have a dumb

Uh uh.

Uh, a coworker made a super gross comment about my body.

Uh, are you crying?

Uh, Bertie asked me to check up on you, so

Uh, but spoiler alert, I'm an architect.

Uh, can we take a peek? Come on.

Uh, guys? We just got 50 new orders.

Uh, hell no!

Uh, hello?

Uh, here, let me show you how to frost.

Uh, hi there. I put in an order for five scoops of eggs.

Uh, how high should we go if they counter?

Uh, I got so excited about that little house,

Uh, I hope not.

Uh, I know I said we'd have time,

Uh, I mean, I have learned so much here, but now I need to move on to

Uh, I meant, what do you want for breakfast?

Uh, I'm gonna head out for coffee. You want anything, boss?

Uh, I'm gonna read this book now 'cause, uh...

Uh, I'm here to check the sink.

Uh, I'm sorry if my joke hurt your feelings.

Uh, is it just me or is it too dark in here?

Uh, is this sanitary?

Uh, just makes you wanna go to the beach.

Uh, maybe this sounds nuts, but this place is actually perfect for us.

Uh, no, thank you.

Uh, no.

Uh, our minimum order is ten scoops.

Uh, so sorry about this.

Uh, that one's kind of long and strategical.

Uh, the old me would've said no,

Uh, the words you're saying are nice,

Uh, wa boobily koo!

Uh, wait. Who are you?

Uh, we kind of have a thing here.

Uh, we should go.

Uh, we're making noises now?

Uh, well, this feels like a trap,

Uh, why don't we switch things up and make this place a loud space?

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh... [chuckles] it'll be fun!

Uh... I don't know. Uh...

Uh... she's been cursing a lot lately.

Uh... ugh!

Uh...!

Uh....

Um, Bertie, the storytelling part comes after I do my condom demo.

Um, do you have a shower or bathroom?

Um, how about I let you lick the spoon?

Um, I didn't know about this.

Um, I'm worried about you.

Um, it happens a few times a month.

Um, it's pretty.

Um, money!

Um, okay.

Um, thank you for having us over. Maybe we can hang out someti [yelps]

Um, uh, could I have that spray back?

Um, we both have jobs.

Um, what is happening?

Um, yes, that is true.

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um... it was Dirk.

Um... that guy!

Unique to the male robin of this region is his uncanny ability

Unky!

Until you've taken out your last box of stuff.

Until your bodies transcend the limits of pleasure!

Until, of course, the body is discovered.

Vegetables are the enemy!

Vegetarian surprise.

Wait a minute! Explain.

Wait a minute.

Wait a second. You're nervous!

Wait, did you cross out "income" and write in "jaguar"?

Wait, do you wanna grab your last box of stuff on your way out?

Wait, does this have penicillin in it?

Wait, so does that mean...

Wait, wait, wait. I read about that neighborhood in architecture school.

Wait, wait. First, I'm gonna wrap him in dough.

Wait, what happened? Are you with her?

Wait, why are you the one judging this competition?

Wait, you're gonna use all of those?

Wait! That's our sugar!

Wait! You're still not here!

Wait. [gasps] Here we go!

Wait. Have we had this conversation before?

Wait. Oh, shit, did I hang up? Ugh!

Wait. So, can I go?

Wait. What?

Wait. What? You bought a house?

Wanna hear a totally improvised banger?

Wanna see if this hawk can do some loop de loops?

Wanna see? Bertie?

Was my swim coach at Jelly Lakes Summer Camp.

Was one of the words "Bertie"?

Was that sarcasm?

Was this your first date since you've been sober?

Wasn't a wise investment?

Wasn't that the plan?

Watch out, Internet.

Way ahead of you.

Way more useful than the other holes I've put in this building.

We all loved each other.

We also teach women to stand up for themselves and say, "No!"

We always knew at some point we'd grow up and move out.

We aren't officially neighbors until I get that C O S.

We can improve our revenue by 25 percent.

We can slow down and take it step by step.

We can't just move out and abandon her. She needs me.

We could be taking Bryson to urgent care right now!

We could target more ads towards quacks, screamers, and loons.

We did it!

We don't talk about money, but we all assume we're in the same place.

We like your shoes.

We need to move fast and make a counteroffer.

We never do!

We shan't waste a moment longer.

We should probably go to the hospital, right?

We should probably head home.

We sit in silence in hopes of hearing answers, 'kay?

We think that cracked egg isn't good for much,

We tried to teach doctors empathy, but it didn't take.

We wouldn't dream of it. You're a team leader now.

We'll be working very closely together, Roberta Songthrush.

We'll probably break up and never see each other again.

We'll see. Bye.

We'll talk more about that in episode two.

We're 30!

We're coming, Bertie! You got this! We believe in you!

We're gonna loop this song till the break a break of dawn!

We're introducing crünts to the world!

We're just going to do a routine extermination,

We're looking for buried treasure.

We're moving in together and you're already sick of my face.

We're so rich, it's sick.

We're still in the running for this thing.

We're supposed to all make small talk just because it's Molting season?

We've been scone walled!

We've got years and years to explore all the possibilities.

Wearer of short shorts!

Wearing an article of clothing that's impossible to pee in.

Welcome to Piles. Have a warm Molting Day!

Welcome to the Congregation of Chill.

Welcome to Yeast Week's nerve center!

Welcome. My name's Evelyn, and

Well, anything worth having usually does.

Well, are you coming?

Well, based on my research,

Well, Bertie and I have been saving for a while.

Well, by the chef's code, I cannot turn down a cooking challenge.

Well, everything's...

Well, he probably meant it as a compliment.

Well, I don't know what you're looking for.

Well, I guess we can just buy ingredients at the regular grocery store.

Well, I hope so.

Well, I liked how they looked.

Well, I need to leave immediately.

Well, I need to permanently borrow the following items:

Well, I think we can all agree that juice isn't food.

Well, I think your boob hole looks really cool.

Well, I wasn't super prepared for this, but I'll start with the basics.

Well, I... I thought I wasn't getting ahead because of sexism,

Well, I'm actually kind of sick.

Well, I'm pretty sure I'm the most qualified.

Well, I'm still mad.

Well, it was just really expensive.

Well, it's a Robin family tradition.

Well, it's not that easy.

Well, maybe I undermine you to protect myself from getting hurt.

Well, my first question is more of a long story about myself.

Well, my things are cute and don't have my face on them.

Well, nobody is at first. That's what practice is for.

Well, now that the two of us live alone,

Well, Pastry Pete did leave you in charge for the day.

Well, staple a spruce to your caboose.

Well, thanks.

Well, that morning, he told me he really liked my new swimsuit.

Well, the minimum order is ten, so...

Well, these bugs are gonna fry.

Well, this is a one time ticket, but do what you must.

Well, this is what I get for blindly following you out to the car.

Well, we better get going. Real packed itinerary.

Well, we had to postpone Bertie's presentation, so...

Well, what if a snake crawls in my mouth, lays eggs,

Well, yes! I'm feeling jittery!

Well, you just invented pretzel confetti, so you should also feel proud.

Well, you're not fooling me.

Well... it's not exactly porn,

Weren't you surprised when Lord Wilkshire showed up at the end?

Western and most parts of the East medicine!

Wha [gags]

Whash?

What a weird world!

What am I supposed to do until I drop dead at 109,

What am I, a food professor?

What an accomplishment!

What are you gonna do on your date with the deli guy?

What are you two losers whispering about?

What brings you here today?

What do you think?

What do you wanna say to the men who are up in your space,

What happened? Did you overwater?

What I came for was to see you and wish you a happy birthday.

What if he comes back?

What if I don't get my shit together

What if I tag along with you to your aunt's house?

What if we forget each other and lose touch forever,

What if we made an offer? Is that crazy?

What if we made them your way?

What if you, I don't know, ordered me around?

What kind of molding would you say this is?

What kind of stuff?

What makes you say that?

What the bitch?

What the fuck?

What the fuck? Don't touch me, you weirdo!

What the hell did I just do? [exclaims] I'm gonna barf!

What the hell?

What up, Jaguar?

What up? I'm Beakles.

What was college like in the '70s?

What would that even be like?

What you said to me yesterday made me uncomfortable!

What, steaming women like they're his own plump little dumplings?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What? How did that even [growls]

What? I had to wipe with something.

What? I thought we were all poor together.

What? I'm always okay.

What? It's cleaner than most public restrooms.

What? Where am I?

What?! What sort of chicanery is afoot?

What'd I tell you about spending too long in the erotica section?

What's a girl gotta do to get some free cookies?

What's going on here?

What's going on with you? You seem, uh, jittery.

What's going on? Can I see her?

What's happening?

What's it like? A little sweet, a little salty?

What's taking Tuca so long?

What's up, you stupid slob?

When I was a kid,

When no women have spoken out loud for three minutes.

When you relapse, I'll be waiting.

When you were getting all that applause at Yeast Week.

Where am I?

Where did that dude go? [shrieks]

Where do you think ChapStick comes from? It doesn't just magically appear!

Where is Mr. Coach Maple?

Where the Havarti at?

Where the jelly's always fresh, and it's magically summer every day?

Where the water gets super dark because it's so deep. [chuckles]

Where the young bird was abducted?

Where thereby none of the sex bugs can legally be killed?

Where you serve things like crostini and bruschetta.

Where you'll meet a whole community of sandwich artists.

Where? Come on. Let's go!

Whew! He's gone.

Which he always drives within five miles of the speed limit,

Which I thought was weird, but he was an adult, so I followed him.

Which is what I'm trying to get you to do on your day off.

Which is why I still listen to ska.

Which one?

Which parts of this doll it's okay to whistle at?

Which spread through Eastern Europe in the 19th century.

Which was mild. She's in the hospital for cirrhosis.

While Bertie fantasizes about all the other lives we could be living.

While I'm living my perfect life with my boyfriend!"

While the swimming pool is still warm!

Who are you going to invite?

Who even are you?

Who even buys ChapStick?

Who just wanna party.

Who pulls weird moves with the women who work under you.

Who was gonna swim all the way to Peanut Butter Island.

Who will help me find my way!

Who you're gonna go out with, right?

Who? Me?

Whoa, girl. Chill!

Whoa, that's true.

Whoa, too cool.

Whoa, too much. Take it easy.

Whoa, what happened to your chest?

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa! Ooh... okay.

Whoa! Sure!

Whoa! Sweet entrance. You caught some air.

Whoa! Who's going to the Beakshires?

Whoa.

Whoa.

Whoa.

Whoa. Her bones came out.

Whoa. Pastry Pete's Patisserie.

Whoa. She's an incredible actress.

Whoo, yeah!

Whoo!

Whoo! [chuckles]

Whoo! [laughs]  I'm so bad!

Whoo! Yeah!

Whoops. Unfreeze!

Why am I so much cooler when I'm by myself?

Why are you being weird about an island?

Why are you crying?

Why are you defending him?

Why are you yelling at my nephew?

Why can't you just go get the lotion or whatever by yourself?

Why choose?

Why did I check the time?

Why did I rip up that check?

Why did you download so many a... [gurgles]

Why did you quit swimming?

Why didn't anyone tell me? How is she?

Why do I always do this?

Why do I always forget to destroy the evidence?

Why do you keep running away from me?

Why do you park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?

Why do you still work for him if he's such a prick?

Why do you think you're better than me? I helped with your promotion!

Why does everyone I live with love free buttin' it so much?

Why does it feel like everyone's staring at me?

Why does Pastry Pete's new pastry have the same name as the old one?

Why don't you call them?

Why don't you just quit that job? Baking is your true calling.

Why don't you tell your aunt that you stopped drinking?

Why is it so crowded in here today?

Why should I buy this house? Go.

Why would you give it to Tuca?

Why would you say that?

Why, Mommy? Why? [cries]

Why, no one has ever seen the male robin do this in the wild before.

Why, on the contrary, Lady Netherfield, I find you delightfully foolish.

Why, why, why?

Will be generously sharing my methodology with you all!

With all of the renovations I've planned...

With its... state of the art cabinets that open and close.

With me and all of our siblings,

With my big... di nner idea.

With my job money.

With nobody cramping her style.

With nothing but a suitcase full of socks, a head full of dreams,

With this bungalow's bewitching baths, brilliant boudoirs...

With your ruby rhubarb and get sex bugs again.

Witty remarks... [blabbering]

Wonderful! You can follow me.

Woo!

Woof! What a day!

Work is great, but wouldn't you rather spend the day at the beach?

Work is the enemy!

Work sucks! And that presentation sounds boring.

Worms to watch, rides to ride, hands to hold...

Worst case scenario, you guys break up, and then I can move back in.

Would I be happy?" [howls]

Would you like some judgment free help?

Would you like to be an apprentice?

Wouldn't wanna interrupt.

Wow, a hardcore career woman with a baking passion on the side?

Wow, here I am.

Wow, it'll be so weird to not be roommates anymore.

Wow, my boss really likes you.

Wow, okay.

Wow, so this all worked out pretty great, huh?

Wow, sweetie, you're really committing to this activity, huh?

Wow, that is awful.

Wow, this looks so peaceful, and reflective, and boring as shit.

Wow, this one is even croissantier.

Wow, you have everything you need here.

Wow!

Wow!

Wow!

Wow! The world's most famous chefs are here!

Wow! You made this?

Wow. I feel so much better now.

Wow. Thank you.

Wow. True.

Yay!

Yeah Ow.  [groaning]

Yeah, and it was so much easier when I drank.

Yeah, aren't jam and jelly the same thing?

Yeah, bitch, you got beat by a woman off the street!

Yeah, both are in that bucket over there.

Yeah, but maybe

Yeah, but now what? How am I gonna sell shit in this town?

Yeah, but that's really more of a hobby, and I have a good job.

Yeah, but you're still working at Conde Nest?

Yeah, house. Cute house.

Yeah, I figured I should do at least one of the tasks

Yeah, I... I can see it. It's just super hot. [chuckles]

Yeah, it is.

Yeah, it's a pretty bad... bug,

Yeah, it's no big deal. I just pull it to the side.

Yeah, it's no big deal. I'm sure we'll live together again at some point.

Yeah, just a bit.

Yeah, let's check these turts.

Yeah, makes me really happy. I think I look handsome in it.

Yeah, she could really use some support.

Yeah, she's a real cut up. Huh.

Yeah, so cute.

Yeah, sometimes I have nightmares about that part of the ocean

Yeah, suck it, Claudette!

Yeah, that's me. I always let shit get out of hand.

Yeah, the flu shot vaccine is only 65 percent effective this season.

Yeah, the prodigal bosom returneth!

Yeah, these are really good!

Yeah, they don't really care what you do. They just wanna make a sale.

Yeah, we've been getting reports that the pastries here are, uh...

Yeah, well, I'll get you what you came for.

Yeah, yeah, bitch! Now we're talking!

Yeah, yeah!

Yeah, yeah. Get it, Europe.

Yeah, yeah. She'll drink enough for the both of us.

Yeah, you know, I'm just trying to get into the fifth floor vibe.

Yeah, you're right.

Yeah!

Yeah! Eat the ghost cake! Eat the ghost cake!

Yeah! Go, Grandma! I mean, Bertie!

Yeah! Let's make this the Congregation of Noise!

Yeah! Money is the enemy!

Yeah! You know when you're coming home late at night?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. All I did was make a loud noise.

Yeah. Be assertive.

Yeah. Feels good.

Yeah. I haven't gone up there in years.

Yeah. I'm gonna go eat these in bed.

Yeah. Just wanted to say...

Yeah. Okay, Auntie.

Yeah. Thanks.

Yeah. We've had such good times.

Yeah. You look like a baby. So cool.

Yeast Week!  [groans]

Yeesh!

Yeesh.

Yep, too far from the city, the kitchen was tiny.

Yep.

Yep. And if we make any mistakes at all,

Yep. As usual, Bertie is right.

Yes, Chef!

Yes, Chef!

Yes, Chef?

Yes, Coach! [grunts]

Yes, darling, fabulous.

Yes, I am shitting serious.

Yes, it is I, Tuca!

Yes, sir!

Yes, these cabinets have 65 percent scream retention.

Yes, when I make a decision, I stick with it,

Yes, yes!

Yes!

Yes! Finally!

Yes! Get 'em, Judge Sparrow!

Yes! Go, Bertie, go!

Yes! We have a winner! [laughs]

Yikes!

Yikes.

Yo Oh!

Yo, Draca, it's me again, your fave new naby.

Yo, party people, as requested,

Yo, red velvet pumps, your time is up.

Yoinks! Why aren't you getting ready for work?

You all unleash your desires and kiss as one!

You always get to be the fun, carefree party animal.

You always get to do whatever you want, and this is what I want!

You and Speckle are making a big commitment.

You are a ruthless negotiator!

You are fine as hell.

You are needy. You always need me.

You are who you are, and that's exactly who you should be.

You are wild, Bernard!

You asked for a basic dresser, and that's what I built.

You asked me to move in.

You can call me Helen. Helen Regina Lady.

You can call me Joel.

You can do anything. Just take it step by step.

You can do it. Just dial those buttons.

You can feel the electricity between us, right? [giggles]

You can keep the money. [grunts]

You can say whatever you want about me,

You can tell by the glasses.

You can't depend on anyone, you know?

You can't even leave the house without me because you're such a little wuss!

You can't just disappear and not talk to me for days!

You combined hoo ha meds, and now the bugs are big

You come in a few nights a week, and I teach you the tools of the trade.

You could have a really bad reaction.

You could what?

You did it, you beautiful, candle reading, wax loving wick witch!

You do so many things I can't.

You don't give up on everything, Tuca.

You don't have a job.

You don't own that, but it looks sharp.

You don't suck at all.

You fourth floorers wouldn't get it.

You girls have everything you need?

You go, girl!

You gonna ask your boss about it today?

You gonna catch some waves out there, Holland dawg?

You got a fish on a plaque?

You gotta give us back our sugar.

You guys should try "the Woodpecker." It's not what it sounds like. It's worse.

You guys talking about the beach?

You guys wanna take bets on how soon I get kicked out of here?

You guys, I feel like if we all take a deep breath

You have an egg up in your cooch,

You have his number. What's the big deal?

You have me and Bertie. We're a family!

You have my permission.

You have this perfect life on this lake. Well, I think this lake fucking stinks!

You have to choose me!

You haven't had the best luck meeting new friends.

You incompetent pieces of shit!

You just left! Without any explanation!

You just need to show people you care

You just need to weather those storms. [burps]

You just never take credit.

You just start making those sweet rolls. I'll get us some bodies!

You keep saying "forever," when statistically, men die at 70.

You kids were barefoot most of the time.

You know how sometimes I'm too helpful?

You know I can't say no to you.

You know I haven't had sex in six months.

You know it's done not by temperature or by time,

You know me! I need you to keep me focused and on task.

You know what he did was wrong, right?

You know what would be fun at a reasonable speed?

You know what? Forget Pastry Pete.

You know you're a bloody pervert, right?

You know, even though things are changing, Tuca, you're still my best friend.

You know, family stuff.

You know, I also have a really stressful day ahead at my job,

You know, I could look around here forever.

You know, I don't talk about work stuff with most people,

You know, I spend all day looking at people lining up for sandwiches.

You know, it's better if you just suck it up and

You know, it's not done by temperature or by time,

You know, just 'cause I lost a friend doesn't mean I have to find a new one.

You know, maybe a cornichon?

You know, one of those things that just get better with age.

You know, this never would've happened if we'd just stayed roommates.

You know, Tuca, being up here, looking at all these little boxes,

You know, Tuca, if you wanna leave your box here, you can.

You know, uh, get back to our primal roots

You love mooching off my money.

You made me think about my own body at work!

You make enough money at your law firm to buy a house?

You may have noticed how I take very short breaths.

You mean for the third time today? Don't mind if I do.

You mean the same Sex Bug Lane

You must spend every waking moment here.

You must, like, like him, like him.

You need to be punished.

You never give up on me.

You never know when they may become disconnected from your life.

You ordered food during all this?

You pretty much let everyone trample all over your tits.

You really need to get in there to see the color change.

You see as they

You seem like a real go getter, an innovator, a maverick!

You should just ask, Bertie.

You sound pitchy.

You startled me... by being.

You think she's okay?

You thirsty?

You thought it was a completely different kind of event.

You ungrateful and talentless little girl.

You want my advice? Sell your stuff somewhere else.

You were always a bright one.

You were on the cover of Tail & Feather magazine?

You, a pizza, my sports bra. It's old, Bertie.

You... can't... do this!

You'd be so cute in a little house.

You'd do that? I'm not too good with focusing.

You'd rather stay at home and be boring.

You'd really have to have your shit together to buy a house.

You'll build a life out there, isolated from society,

You'll have to move back out.

You'll never be able to sell baked goods in this town.

You're a power tripping creep

You're all familiar with my Tasty Num Nums Award winning invention,

You're always finding gigs.

You're an adult bird woman.

You're avoiding me.

You're courageous, free spirited, fully present.

You're hanging out with Draca now? Um, needy much?

You're having trouble getting your business off the ground.

You're in the hood.

You're incapable of forming intimate relationships

You're just like your mother.

You're just not looking hard enough!

You're like a character from a romantic comedy!

You're like the boring dad I never had.

You're lucky that's just yogurt.

You're not gonna feel that way tomorrow.

You're not nervous!

You're not officially moved out

You're not seeing her in the best... light.

You're overreacting. Relax.

You're pathetic.

You're prepared.

You're so intuitive.

You're so irresponsible. Get it together!

You're taking back that island! That's Peanut Bertie Island!

You're telling me. I'm *******.

You're the one who has the smart things to say during meetings

You're the one who said croissants!

You're the perfect candidate.

You're trying to sabotage me now?

You're... really great at this.

You've been acting crazy all night.

You've been seduced by the alluring mistress that is architecture.

You've got a lot of work to do, Ms. Senior Operations Analyst.

You've got mobile notary, fortune walker,

You've made me feel so welcome.

Your b holes will adore this Tuscan marble.

Your boss wants to give me the promotion you want.

Your brain is a free zone.

Your cabin is straight out of a fairy tale,

Your co ownership agreement should answer questions like, mm...

Your friend who was hit by a car?

Your posterior is marvelous, and the whole kingdom shall'th see it!

Your style is so radical. Um

Your technique needs to be tamed, but I taste your passion.

Your work sucks,  and I'm here to make it better.

Yugh! Children's choirs. Go through puberty already!

Yummy!

Yup! But we just found out he punched the car first.

Yup! What's with the hole?

Yup.

...ruin you! [gasps]

'Sup? [phone buzzes]

"Women Taking Up Space." [woman] Wootus!

[air horn blows] Ah! Hi, Claudette.

[all cheer] Yeah! You go, girl! You did it!

[all cheering] Yes!

[all sigh] [camera shutter clicks]

[angry chattering] ♪ I want you to give me some more ♪

[audience cheers and applauds] [burps]

[barking] [laughs]

[barking] Ruin you!

[barks] [chuckles]

[barks] Um, wow.

[bass music plays] [studio audience applauds]

[bawls] Shh.

[beeps] [grumbles]

[beeps] [Speckle] Uh, hey, honey.

[beeps] Hi, Bertie. It's me, your phone.

[bell ringing] Bernard!

[bell tolls[ Ugh!

[Bertie gasps] Oh, no! [laughs]

[Bertie huffing] [laughing]

[Bertie squeals] [Tuca laughs]

[Bertie whimpers] I know they look scary at first,

[Bertie's Boob] Wa pow! Look at me now! [crowd gasps]

[Bertie] What can I do? [EMT] All you can do is wait.

[Bertie] Wow! [Tuca] Mm hmm.

[bicycle bell rings] [Tuca hums]

[bleats] [exclaims]

[both laugh] Good one!

[both laughing] [Speckle] Oh.

[both scream] Shit! I mean, don't worry.

[both] Are you shushing me? No, I was... [coughs] shushing the TV.

[both] Hi, Chef. What the hell are these?

[burps] [both sigh]

[burps] And we're gonna fix this dump.

[buzzes] [Speckle] Me again.

[buzzes] Hey, uh, sorry.

[camera shutter clicks] Aw. You scared him off, Tuca.

[cat meows] No.

[chanting] Sex bugs! Woo!

[chatter] Welcome! Your seat is waiting!

[chittering] [barking]

[chuckles] [Dakota chuckles]

[chuckles] [laughs] Oh! There he is.

[chuckles] [screams]

[chuckles] [timer dings]

[chuckles] Hmm.

[chuckles] We brought croissants, too.

[chuckles] Yeah, right. No, really. Check it.

[Claudette grumbles] Oh. Sorry, Claudette.

[clears throat] Not at all. It's no matter.

[clock ticking] Um, school district, uh, backsplash,

[Coach Maple grunts] [Pat hums]

[computer chimes] [Connie] Hello!

[computer] Jerk! This must be how I punch?

[computer] Jerk! Jerk! Grind! Grind! [DirtyGoat moaning]

[computer] Jerk! Jerk! Jerk! [beeping]

[computer] Jerk! Jerk! Jerk! [grunting]

[computer] Jerk! Jerk! Jerk! [man groans]

[computer] Jerk. [DirtyGoat groans]

[coughs] [chuckles]

[coughs] Uh huh.

[crab pincers click] Ah!

[cringes] Is that okay? Oh, of course.

[crowd chanting] C O N, burn the Dirk! [grunting] This is bananas.

[crowd chants] Dirk is the enemy! What's happening?

[crowd cheering] [dance music playing]

[crowd cheering] [steps in beat]

[crowd cheering] Oh, thank you, thank you.

[crowd cheers] [howls]

[dance music playing] [chanting] Sex bugs! Sex bugs! Sex bugs!

[dance music plays] Hey.

[dings] Number 72!

[DirtyGoat] Thank you! [beeps]

[distorted] ♪ Go! ♪ [Tuca, Bertie grunting]

[distorted] Smoothies. [distorted] Juicing!

[dog barks] No!

[door opens, closes] Wee!

[door opens] They're back.

[door opens] Tuca, I'm so glad you're okay.

[door opens] Welcome to Pastry Pete's. Can I help you?

[doors open and close] Uh... she really liked the show.

[echoes] More! Ugh!

[electricity buzzes] Huh.

[engine revs] [Bertie laughs]

[exclaims] [roars]

[exclaims] [roars]

[exclaims] [Stallion] Hello? Are you okay?

[exclaims] [grunts] Shit, shit, asshole, dick face!

[exhales] [beeps]

[faucet turns off] [panting]

[flies buzzing] And these melons reek!

[gasps] [chuckles]

[gasps] [crashes]

[gasps] [tires screech]

[gasps] I assume the two of you are married.

[gasps] I think I know what to do with this.

[gasps] Roberta Songthrush?

[gasps] Uh, who?

[gasps] We'll use it once to impress our friends,

[gasps] What?

[gasps] Oh! [Speckle] Hey, is that your mom?

[gasps] Really? Or you can just take it.

[gasps] What? This is crazy!

[giggles] You are going to love this place.

[giggles] Aw. [keypad clicks, phone whooshes]

[giggles] Ha ha! You dummy! [kissing]

[groans] [actors moan]

[groans] [car horn honks]

[groans] [computer] JO.

[groans] [shudders]

[groans] Better!

[groans] I swear, Tuca.

[groans] Plus, it tasted like ashes. Yuck!

[growls] Hmm...

[gruffly] Hello? Hello, Bertie!

[grumbles] [door opens and closes]

[grumbles] Hey, hey, hey!

[grumbles] Sorry!

[grumbles] What are you even trying to do?

[grunting] [Pastry Pete grunts]

[grunting] I brought you something.

[grunting] Really breathe it in.

[grunts, pants] Wait. Bertie, that's such a good idea.

[grunts] [bones crack]

[grunts] ♪ Give me some more ♪

[grunts] Fuck, shit!

[grunts] Hey. So, um, I'm sorry about what I said.

[grunts] Oh, you pure hearted dummy.

[grunts] Ow, ow, ow!

[gulps] Okay. Templates!

[harmonica playing] [applause]

[hawk screeching] [Bertie] Tuca!

[high pitched ringing] [heartbeat thumping]

[hip hop music plays] [crowd cheers]

[hisses] ♪ Dirt dirt dirt dirt dirt dirty turtie ♪

[hisses] Huh.

[hisses] What?

[hisses] Woo!

[Holland laughs] [others laugh]

[Holland] Bertie! [exclaims]!

[Holland] What was that? Oh, heh, that was the TV.

[honking] What the

[horns blow] Surprise!

[indistinct chatter] [Bertie] Hmm...

[Jaggy growls] [man screams]

[Jaggy growls] I'm a terrible bird!

[jaguar roars] Whoa, whoa, whoa. Easy, girl!

[jurors gasp] Ah!

[jurors gasp] I knew it!

[jurors gasp] No!

[jurors murmuring] I'd like to call my first witness.

[jurors murmuring] Well, I have great judgment.

[keyboard clicks] Just select and nudge to the right.

[knocking on wall] [both gasp]

[knocking] [screams, groans]

[laugh] [sighs]

[laughing] [alarm ringing]

[laughing] Was it Bruce?

[laughs] [distorted] ♪ Go! ♪

[laughs] [gasps]

[laughs] [goat bleats]

[laughs] [laughs awkwardly]

[laughs] [screams]

[laughs] Uh... Tuca?

[laughs] Well, she's out of control.

[laughs] What's wrong?

[laughs] Woo!

[laughs] Yay, Movie Day!

[laughs] Your booby gave me the rundown.

[laughs] I'll take a dozen! [all laugh]

[laughs] That's absurd. You know what's absurd?

[laughs] Times ten! Whoa, boy! That's... [Tuca] Ka kaw!

[man screaming] I need peace and quiet!

[man] Delivery! Come on up.

[man] Look away, sweetie! Look away! [woman] Oh, no!

[man] Oh, yeah. Oh, God. Take that and that!

[man] Why? Why? Hey, is that a jaguar?

[mouse clicks] [moos]

[mouse clicks] [popping]

[murmuring] [snorting]

[murmurs of assent] Hmm...

[objects clattering] [Speckle] I'm okay!

[objects shatter] Actually, we aren't buying anything.

[Pat] It can wait. [exclaims]

[people scream] [jaguar roars]

[phone buzzes] [groans]

[phone buzzes] [grumbles]

[phone buzzes] [Speckle] Hey, uh, please call me.

[phone buzzing] ...a miracle!

[phone buzzing] [muffled grunt]

[phone clicking] Huh? What's going on? Oh, right.

[phone whistles] Ah!

[pig grunts] Maybe.

[plate shatters] I'm so stupid.

[puffs] I'm sorry!

[R&B music plays] [electricity crackles]

[ragtime music plays] Oh, yeah! Come get it, zaddy!

[rattling] [groaning]

[roars] [objects shatter]

[scoffs] Goodbye!

[scream echoes] Ah, sweet, sweet freedom.

[screaming] Whoo!

[screams] [chanting] Sex bugs! Sex bugs!

[screams] [gasps]

[screams] I love when you get a new crush!

[screams] I'm back! Did I miss anything?

[screams] Nah, that's an easy fix.

[screams] Oh, yeah, big boy.

[screams] Warm greetings, friendly banter,

[screams] Welcome!

[sensual music plays] [man] You're so sexy.

[shouting] that this is deeply un chill! [crowd clamoring]

[sighs] ...for 200 years.

[sighs] [beeps]

[sighs] [door opens]

[sighs] [door opens]

[sighs] [rock music playing]

[sighs] Hey!

[sighs] Well, I just wanna add...

[sink rattles] [moaning continues]

[sirens blaring] [Ultra Sam] You and me, baby.

[sizzling] That's the second time today

[snarls] [gasps]

[sniffles and sobs] What's wrong, friend?

[snoring] [Bertie] "To whom it may concern..."

[sobs] Now, where's my next gig at?

[song ends abruptly] [man coughs]

[Speckle grunts] [squeal and laughs]

[Speckle] Bertie, are you up there? Uh oh.

[Speckle] Hey, Bertie? Ah! Not my porn! I hate hunks!

[squawks] [bleats]

[squeals] You're great! [giggles]

[stammers] Okay, hey, can we just Now you try.

[stutters] I'm number 72. Oh, hey.

[suction noise] [crowd applauds]

[Tallulah] Ha ha! [both chuckling]

[throbbing] [ominous music plays]

[thumps] [Speckle] Ow! Box!

[thwack] [Speckle grunts]

[timer dings] And right on time.

[timer dings] And right on time.

[tires screech] [screams]

[tires screech] Hold it right there!

[tires screech] Oh, no!

[tires screech] Wow!

[Tuca and Bertie pant] [distorted] ♪ Go! ♪

[Tuca groans] Ugh!

[Tuca squeals] What's going on over there?

[Tuca] Come and get your lunch orders. Huh?

[Tuca] Huh. [gasps] It's so cute!

[Tuca] Whoop! No! [groans]

[vacuum humming] Uh, this is making me feel worse.

[vocalizes] [barks]

[whimpering] [Pete moans]

[whimpers] [tea kettle whistling]

[whimsicaly music plays] ♪ Best friend, best friend ♪

[whistles] [bleats]

[whistling] What a lovely day. [woman screaming]

[woman giggles] Ooh! What kind of paradise is this?

[woman moaning] Oh, no! Game over.

[woman] Duffy, I'm so glad you called. [door opens, closes]

[woman] Juice! [man] Smoothies!

[woman] Juice! [man] Smoothies!

[woman] Of course you'd do that. What is that supposed to mean?

[woman] Put that away! [kid cries]

[woman] There are children here! [man] Oh, Timmy, no!

♪ But I can't help it ♪ ♪ No, she can't help it ♪

♪ Cup o' sug' ♪ [chuckles] Okay, okay!

♪ Dirt dirt dirt dirty turtie ♪ [laughs]

♪ For all of the reasons ♪ ♪ What are the reasons? ♪

♪ For no reason ♪ ♪ For no reason ♪

♪ I'm losing my grip ♪ ♪ She's losing her grip ♪

♪ I'm losing my shit ♪ [spotlight clanks]

♪ La la la la... ♪ ♪ What a treat, my week is so sweet ♪

♪ She's losing her shit ♪ ♪ She's losing her shit ♪

♪ That dirt dirt dirt dirty turtie ♪ Hey!

♪ Tuca ♪  ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca's in love ♪ Stop. Fine, I'll call him, okay?

♪ You'd want to kiss me, too ♪ ♪ You'd want to kiss in a canoe ♪

A complete teardown! Then why did you

A Lippincott! A jungle bungalow! It's true!

A restaurant, then? No, I work at a magazine.

Aah! Wow.

Ack! Let's get started. Get in here.

Agh! Ooh! [giggles]

Ah ha! [chuckles] Hey!

Ah, yeah. [water splashes]

Ah! [coughs] [people screaming]

Ah! What are you doing? Just trimming a bush.

Aha. Everyone loves the beach. I work as hard as I "beach"!

All good, Bruce? Yep!

All right! [laughs]

Also, I bought a truck. Beep beep! [horn honks]

Also... hi. [gasps] Oh, my!

and a second suitcase also full of socks. [snickers]

And cheese drawer. Um...

And I don't want to. [tires screech]

And tell her I made it? No!

And those areas are Dense with eagles!

And you have to take Ta da! Finished!

And you're in the front row. [giggles]

And your croissants? They're dry. Get out!

Anybody want to start us off? Yeah, I've got something here.

Are you alive? [groaning] What?

Are you eating chips for lunch again? No.

Barb! Barb, Barb.

Barf, barf, you know? Oh.

before central heating... [crowd laughing]

Bernard, fetch the checkbook! [bell rings]

Bertie, I'm so proud of you. Aw!

Bertie! Uh, today will go great!

Bertie! Bertie! [Speckle] Tuca, is that you?

Bertie! Bertie! Eh! What?

Bird flu. Oh, no!

Bleh! Too formal. What?

Bones. So many. [gibbers]

Boom! Boom! Boom! No!

Boy marries girl. Boy kills girl... [Tuca] Ooh!

But great confidence. Oh, my God. [giggles] Thank you.

But I already have a full time job! An apprenticeship, then?

But my CPR license is expired! We agree to your terms.

But you're not listening. [phone buzzes]

but you've been gone for, like It's not too late!

Can I have some? Tuca!

Can I make one? Sure.

Can I show this to Bertie? Of course!

Can we buy... this keychain? No.

Careful! Hmph!

Cheers! [clinking]

Cheers. [giggles]

Cool lady. Yeah, cool lady.

Cool! Ugh!

Could I not? Here you go!

Damn it, jaguar! [Jaggy growls]

Damn. [birds chirping, screeching]

Dance break? On its way.

Denied! Can I use the bathroom?

Did she say "work" or "Dirk"? I heard "Dirk."

Did you get that? Mm hmm.

Did you see the sport this weekend? Indeed, I did. Good sport.

Do you have a husband or a boyfriend? What?

Do you have a pool? Yes. Why?

Does this look like a phone booth to you? I was just

Don't be! I love you! Let's make a baby!

Dude, don't let me eat that card, m'kay? Thank you?

Duh! [chuckles]

Easy. Ah! I don't think it's gonna fit, Bertie.

Eat my ass, Kevin! Ah!

Eek! ...we can build a deck with a fire pit.

Eek! Teens! Out of the way, sprouts!

Eep! [snorting]

Eep! I'm gonna eat your feet!

Eep! Okay, Bertie, ready to plate.

Eh, sweet lips. [giggles] Thank you.

Everything they say is a lie. Eep!

Ew! Come on, let's go!

Ew! I don't get it.

Ew! Run!

Excuse me, what was your name? Tuca. I'm a temp.

Feel better! See you tomorrow! [beeps]

Feels weird. Uh, I just can't picture it.

Fine. And don't wipe the browser history

Firewood? [pants]

followed by seven hours of world news. [snores]

for three months... [scoffs]

Fresh air. [laughing]

Fuck you! Ow! [screams]

Gah! Oops. Sweaty.

Get out at once! Yeesh. Okay.

Girl, chill! Uh...

Give me a minute to change. Oh, yeah, take your time.

Glaze? To your right.

Go ahead, B. Uh...

Go ask Holland for what you deserve. Okay.

Good one! [Jaggy growling]

Got it? Got it. Jeez.

Gotcha! No!

Great curb appeal. Yeah, not bad.

Great. Thank you.

Ha! [exclaims]

Ha! [laughs]

Ha. [chuckles]

Happy birthday! [horn squawks]

Happy Molting Day! God molt us, everyone!

Have a warm Molting Day! You, too!

He's been weird to me, too. He goosed my butt!

Hell, yeah, girl! I'll work the oven. [chuckles] Well, maybe not the oven.

Hello, DirtyGoat. Wanna play? Heck, yeah.

Here you go, Big H. Killing it, Tuca.

Here you go. [beeps]

Here you go. Come on. You're all right. [groans]

Here. [sniffs and sighs]

Hey o! [both laugh]

Hey there, little buddy. [laughs]

Hey, be cool. I can't. I'm starved for her approval!

Hey, hey, hey. [sobbing]

Hey, Holland! Oh, good morning, Bertie.

Hey, honey haunches. [screams]

Hey, ladies. Not now, Bruce.

Hey, my friend's not dirty. Uh, what was that, sugar shoes?

Hey, Tuca, wild pitch... What did you call me?

Hey, what are you guys in line for? Sneakers? Ice cream?

Hey, what you got there? Oh, just some ideas.

Hey, you're the HR person, right? [camera shutter clicks]

Hey! [crowd cheering]

Hey! Asshole! [grumbles]

Hey! Whoo hoo! And he was really good at it.

Hi, Bertie! [gasps]

Hi, could you keep it down? Yeah, could you not?

Hmm? Oh, boy!

Hmm. [electronic chirping]

Hmm. Here you go, Tuca. Cute! Thanks.

Hmph! [sighs]

How did you I heard everything you said

How did you know that? There's a billboard!

How does that make you feel? Shut up, Daddy!

How is that supposed to make me feel? Bad!

Huh? [goats bleat]

Huh? I'm an orthopedic surgeon.

Huh? Mwah!

Huh? No, no, no! What are you doing?

Huh? Repeat customers get five percent off.

Huh? Speckle... you son of a bitch!

Huh. [Bertie humming]

Huh. [Jaggy roars]

Huh. [phone buzzes]

I actually had a pretty cool day, too. Hmm.

I always drop everything to help you! [scoffs]

I burned the curly ones. Oh, great!

I can drive. Shotgun!

I can't believe how light my pubes feel. [laughs]

I can't believe we pulled this off. Woo!

I don't know about this one, Internet. [door opens]

I don't know if I'm comfortable with You're such a small bird.

I flashed my boobs on the Gut Scrambler. Uninhibited and

I get to cross examine! Objection!

I got a good one. [shushes]

I got you, girl! [people gasp]

I have an amazing idea! Follow me! No!

I have an idea! [Bertie] Uh oh.

I have to tell Pastry Pete I'm quitting. Good thing you still have your other job.

I just wish I knew what I did wrong. Mm hmm.

I know you hate the holidays. [music stops]

I know you're afraid of doctors... Unless they're made out of garlic, yes.

I know, right? [dogs barking]

I love you. [Terry groans]

I made you, and I can ruin you. [gasps]

I made you, and I can ruin you. [grunts]

I need a man with a mushy face. I don't know what that means.

I need to say something. [clears throat] "Yes, Chef."

I screwed up the date. What?

I see you listed "jaguar." That's correct.

I showed up with a parasol. Fun and quirky.

I smell 'em. [chuckles]

I start a new career every week! And I don't have a rich aunt to lean on.

I want you to see this. Yes, Chef!

I was born on a Wednesday Sorry to cut you off,

I'll open it by the end of the week! Impossible!

I'm crushin' hard, girl! [scream continues]

I'm finished! Gross!

I'm getting the hang of this. [chimes]

I'm gonna kill you! Ooh, ooh!

I'm not in the mood. Yeah, that would be wonderful!

I'm not sure if something's a compliment. [bell dings]

I'm pretty sure the landlord wouldn't Hey, Speckle's an architect.

I'm sorry if you had a bad experience Can I have a promotion?

I'm the new office temp! [fanfare]

I've had all 22 birthdays there! Okay.

If it gets too dark, it's over. [chuckles]

If it gets too dark, it's over. Uh... mm hmm.

If you could Hey!

Is everything okay? In the grand scheme of things, yes.

Is everything okay? Oh, yeah. [forced chuckle]

Is that a candy cigarette? You'll never know.

Is that okay? Yeah. Whatever you want.

It is pretty fun! [hawk screeching]

It's a lot, don't you think? No way.

It's my turn to freak out! You're right.

It's okay if No!

It's way better than jelly. Ooh! Do marmalade.

It's... not... lasting! Whoa.

Jam's chunkier. Huh.

JG! [snarls]

Just a few more! [grunting]

Let's go. Yes, Chef!

Let's keep this jam going, girls! [dance music resumes]

Like a Tuca promise? You've gotta come!

Like me! Check this out.

Like this one time Oh, no. It's my boss!

lives in that jungle bungalow? Ooh!

Look at me! Oh.

Look, I gotta go. Wait. Terry?

Love the tiger. Me ow.

Make this restroom more inviting. Uh, who are these...?

Making more sex bugs? So what if we are?

man bros. [man grunts]

Maybe I'm too judgmental? To be fair, couple dates are the worst.

Meow! Meow!

Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine! No!

Mm hmm? Eek! [pants]

Mm hmm. Last week, we talked about manspreading.

Mm mmm. No, you shouldn't! [gags]

Mm... So?

Mmm! Great muffins, neighbor. [chuckles] Thanks, neighbor.

Mmm... I should get going, though,

My lunch! Uh, here you go.

My own garden. [Speckle] We'd have so much space here.

New bird, you're hired. [laughs]

Nice drumsticks, chickadee. [screams]

Nice stems, baby! [groans]

Nice! [screams]

No, I'm not. Whoa. Oh, my God!

No, no. Like this. [whimpers]

No! Sorry, Fran!

Not the way I play it. Let's go! [laughs] Okay!

Nothing belongs to anyone. [bike bell rings]

Now, first order of business. Whoa!

Of course, my sweet Edith. But the nests, there are so many!

Oh, denied. Did you even finish reading

Oh, good one, guys. [grunts]

Oh, hell no. Bertie needs my help. [glass shatters]

Oh, hey! Whoa, Dirk?

Oh, how she would have laughed at that. Aw!

Oh, I got this. Whoa.

Oh, my God. Are we mean? No way.

Oh, no, I really Tuca'd this up. [chanting continues]

Oh, no, thanks. Just take a flier!

Oh, no! [glass shatters]

Oh, no! Leave her. She belongs to the mall now.

Oh, no! Are you Are you sick? No.

Oh, no! I made a bee hole! Huh?

Oh, no. [groans, coughs] [Bertie gasps]

Oh, shit! [phone buzzing]

Oh, thanks. Mm hmm.

Oh, wonderful! Yup.

Oh, wow! That sounds great.

Oh, you're nervous. [machine chimes]

Oh! Move, you piss colored blob!

Oh. Ugh! Terrible!

Oh. I'm not so great. [door opens]

Oh. Mmm. Disgusting!

Okay, baby. Ooh!

Okay... Wanna do it?

Ooh, it is a nice door! What?

Ooh, what position is it? Senior operations analyst.

Ooh! Good morning, Ms. B!

Ooh! That looks really good.

Ooh! Architecture podcast? Ugh, no!

Ooh. Ooh, I don't know about that one.

Or HR for short. Okay!

Or like a body full of burps. [burps]

Or when you ate too much. It might feel empowering to mentor her.

Order! Hear, hear!

Out! [clucks, screams]

Ow! Listen, lady,

Pardon me. Watch it, newb!

Peanut Bertie Island! Huh?

Perfect! Let's go there now! Eh, it's getting late.

Piping bag. Coming right up.

Please don't cry. [bawls]

Please stop. Please help.

Please, Bertie! Please! Okay.

Please? Nope! Fly away, family!

Political podcast? Boo!

Put Dirk down! I said "work"! [all] Dirk is the enemy!

Really unique. Tropical.

Really? Really?

Right now. We've got room.

Right, Bertie? Yep.

See you at the next Wootus meeting! Goddess be with you.

See, Bertie? Everything's working out. Yeah.

Seems harsh. [laughs]

She is okay! For now. It won't last.

She said "work"! Work is the enemy! [chanting continues]

She sounds like a hell of a lady. She's basically me times ten.

She's a lamp? She's so much more!

Shh! Do not leave your number in that book.

Should we double check? It's too noisy.

Smoothies are juice! Excuse me, could I just...

so now she's working for me. Ugh!

so we can build them crazy houses. [dogs barking]

So, the sex book didn't help? [laughs] Nope.

So, this is my new pet, Jaggy. [growls]

So, you aren't leaving? Nope.

So... Uh, cool place you got here, Draca.

Sorry about all this, buddy. No problem!

Sorry, grandmas. Better luck never! 'Cause you're old!

Sorry. [groans]

Speckle better watch out. I do not! Shut up!

Speckle not puttin' out? No, Speckle's puttin' in.

Stay in there. Really breathe it in. [Dakota] Oh, no. [grunts]

Sure, yes. [panting]

Sure! How about banana muffs?

Sustained! Hey! I say that!

Take back the bench! Claim the chaise! Shh!

Tally ho! Tuca!

Templates, come! [whistle trills]

Thank you for this. Anything for you, my lady.

Thank you, both of you! [laughs] [groans]

Thank you, candle! [chuckles] That is rando!

That one's tough. There's no floor to the universe.

That sounds kinda nice. We have nothing in common.

That was a test, and you failed. [screams]

That would be so embarrassing! Is that a thing that can happen?

That's good. That's me. [man] Tuca!

That's... that's a lot. You know you love it, Speckle!

The ones that I had to co sign on? Mom!

Then I'll be all done moving out. Great idea!

There hasn't even been a trial! A trial? [laughs]

There she is! Oh, thank God.

There she is! Yo!

There, right there. Look. Yes, Chef.

There's, like, four of those! The strawberry and raspberry one.

they eat the table! [laughs] Yes!

They're called "crunts"! Oh, you got a crush on him.

This all seems to check out. Thank you. Good day.

This is the meat drawer. Oh?

This place is perfect for us. I was thinking the same thing.

This place is perfect for us. I was thinking the same thing.

Those are just toast! What?

Time for the next part of my plan. Ooh!

to be faithful to these instructions? [jurors] Oh!

Tuca [Speckle] Hey, Bertie!

Tuca, I'm not a law But what about the apartment?

Tuca, the sugar bowl? Give it! I gave it to a neighbor.

Tuca, what are you do Just as I suspected.

Tuca! Bertie!

Tuca! No time to argue.

Tuca? [moaning continues]

Tuca... Oh! And this one, I wrote.

Turt alert! To the streets!

Twice. Oh, no.

Two different kinds of oven fries! Ooh!

Ugh! [Deli Guy] Hey.

Ugh! Ooh, I know what you need.

Ugh! Your mooching is cute now,

Ugh! Bodies are terrible! Whoa!

Ugh! Forget this! Let's just talk. Sure.

Ugh! No! [glass shatters]

Ugh! This could take a while. I'm... I need to go.

Ugh. Ooh, sick.

Uh huh. Yeah.

Uh, Bertie. Bertie, why don't you go? Ah! Oh, I don't know if I'm ready.

Uh, hi! Oops.

Uh, just a minute. Ugh.

Uh, no. I think Dirk covered it. Yup.

Uh, Tuca, I'm not You assholes wanna be on the jury?

Uh, uh, uh! Go ahead!

Uh, wait. This is the most important part. Look!

Uh, what? Ma'am, are these your sex bugs?

Uh... Are you shy, you cute little deviant?

Uh... Really short.

Uh... Ugh!

Uh... Why are you being so weird?

Uh... okay. Yum yummy!

Um, thanks? [clattering]

Um... Did you trade a titty for a promotion?

Um... Faster!

Voilà! Ooh.

Waba waba! [groans]

Wait, did he grab you, too? You don't understand.

Wait, what? Maybe you could give this woman a chance.

Wait! Right one staying put and lookin' nice.

Warm potato! Warm potato! I'm so sorry. I don't know why I'm...

We all have regrets. You don't know what you're talking about!

We have to do something! I might have an idea.

We're all in one big con! [all cheering]

We're fine. What do you got?

we're working on it! Woo woo!

Well, I don't know what happened. I think they're in a fight.

Well, see you later, neighbor. [chuckles]

Well, what about this place? Hmm?

What are you doing here, you sc****? Damn, looking good, sugar teats...

What are you even talking about? I performed the crünt demo perfectly.

What bakery do you work at? Oh, I don't work at a bakery.

What is that? Pat made it. I think I wanna be her.

What the hell? [chuckles]

What? [shrieks]

What? Check your desk.

What? I know you think I'm needy.

What? Just making polite conversation.

What? They're trouser crickets, Bertie!

What? You worked for me.

What? Why? Because that's what neighbors do.

What? You gave her my gamby's sugar? Gamby?

What? You slept with Bruce? He's the main reason I'm sober now.

What'd you say? [clears throat]

What's going on? [grumbles] I'm so frustrated.

What's in here? Oh! Peeping holes.

What's that? Oh. [chuckles]

What's the matter? They never called! My stupid family!

What's the plan now? I don't know.

What's up with the promotion, though? Oh, yeah!

Whatever you got, flaunt it. What, these saggy old things?

When have I ever hurt you? Never! That's what scares me!

Where are you going? I don't know.

Where you spin out over something small? I don't do that!

Where's he at? He's unpacking his toiletries.

Which one of these numbers is Speckle's? I don't think he's in there.

Which way did it go? Hmm.

Whoa! [gasps]

Whoa! [tires screech]

Whoa. Boo!

Whoa. Wow.

Whoa. Are you okay? [sobbing]

Whoo! A fine recap of things I already know.

Whoo! What? [screams]

Why am I still talking? I was hoping you'd ask for that position.

Why are you doing this to me? This isn't about you!

Why are you in charge of them? Two words, Bertie: confidence.

Why didn't he call it the boint? [scoffs]

Why don't you give me some sugar? Ugh. Bruce, give it up.

Why don't you use your kitchen for now? I know!

Why? I'm going to open my own bakery.

Without a follow team? Without breakfast?

Woo hoo! ♪ Twerk, twerk, twerk it down low ♪

Woo hoo! [laughs] [gibbers]

Woo! Hey! [laughs]

Word of mouth? [Bertie] Oh, my God!

Wow, look at all these memories. [Tallulah chuckles]

Wow, that was a deep nap you were having. Bla

Wow! Check out the backyard.

Yeah, but I can handle it. I know you can.

Yeah, cake that shit on, you dumb shrew. Damn, who made this mirror?

Yeah, yeah, yeah! [all cheer]

Yeah! [girl] Good job!

Yeah! That's right!

Yeah? Sure!

Yeah? Yes!

Yeah. [engine revs]

Yep. There's a leak. Oh, um...

Yes, she can, and I'm the proof. [laughs]

Yes! We will not be shamed! [alarm buzzes]

Yes. Claudette? Huh?

You actually came here to help me? Yep.

You asked me for help. I did?

You ate your own surgically removed egg? Gross, right?

You dear, delicate, little fool. [door opens]

You don't have to call me "Chef." [whistles]

You don't know my life! [baby cries]

You don't need to do that. Mm, it's okay.

You fell off so fast. Thwap! [pants]

You go, girl! Hooray for Bertie!

You got it. Tuca!

You know what? I quit. [Tuca] Whoo hoo!

You like yolks! Yolks?

you listed "jaguar." That's correct.

You look just like her. Yeah.

You loved the jelly! [scoffs] I don't know.

You okay? Uh, uh huh. Totally.

You said we'd be done in ten minutes! The walk here doesn't count.

You take milk? Yes, please.

You were so helpful in that meeting. Oh, no problem.

You're a little late. Aw, shucks.

You're a, uh, croissant savant. [gasps]

You're back? And meaner but cooler? Well, well, well.

You're the bad boy of architecture! Woo hoo!

You've been a very bad bird. [groans]

your house goes to the bank. [Bertie] What?

Your new phone came in the mail. Oh, about that...

Your pain au chocolat is vibrating. [buzzes]

Yum! Here's the latest analytics, Ms. Bertie.

...and I don't want some stupid fight to come between us.

...and remarries girl's sister in a backyard ceremony

...birds used to migrate south for the winter.

...but I can take you to see one today, a real one.

...great!

...who, ironically, died not climbing anything.

'Cause I can help move this box of hers over there if she needs

'Cause, uh, eagles love all that shit.

'Roads are but the lymphatic system of the city,'

'Sup, Bertie? Thanks for earlier.

"As famed urbanist Elebert Whitscythe once said,

"As the owner of a vintage touring bicycle,

"Crop rotation grew popular in the 18th century."

"Dear editor of the Bird Town Gazette, foreseeing increased mobility issues,

"Dear newspaper, potholes suck.

"Dropping sweets."

"Dweeby Dude Bertie's Dating," "Dorky Bertie Crush,"

"Get to know your partner's desires.

"Good sir, 'tis with a humble heart I admit eth

"Hi, nice door."

"Hot Mating Dances You Can Do At Home."

"How's it hangin', Holland, ya bossy boy?"

"I can't go outside because literally everything terrifies me

"Me sick. Cough. Cough." Send.

"My dearest Samuel, I am 112 years old now,

"Netherfield Manor is where you now stand.

"Netherfield Place, where Geoffrey bid goodbye.

"Step one, remove cap. Step two, apply ointment."

"The cultured cream enhances the flavor notes, Tuca."

"The Lamest Guy Ever"?

"These pastries taste like farts." [scoffs]

"Trying on outfit" montages are supposed to be fun.

"Tuca, erase yourself from the apartment we shared for six years

"Tuca, get my sugar turt!"

"Welcome to Cock in the Pit,

"Were I to be wrapped so gingerly as a pair of gloves,

"What happens to the property if, uh, one of you drops dead?"

"What up, Pastry Pete? Remember that time you offered me a job?

"Works in 12 hours."

"WTUS."

["All In (No Niin)" by Panik Disco feat. Artymove plays]

["City On The Map" plays]

[alarm chirps]

[all chant] Marmalade!

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all laugh]

[all laugh]

[all laugh]

[all sighing]

[all] Crab Thingz!

[all] Girl Thingz!

[Amber] I just worry about you, and I want you to be okay,

[Amber] I love you, and I'm sorry. Hmm.

[animals chittering, growling]

[announcer] And now, please welcome to the stage,

[announcer] Well, that was a very sensible migration indeed.

[Ashley] But you said I was irresponsible and needy.

[Ashley] I'm sorry. I love you.

[banker] If both of you are killed, your house will go to your murderer.

[banker] Now let's get into what happens if neither of you get murdered,

[barking, chittering]

[barking, chittering]

[barking, chittering]

[barking, chittering]

[barking, chittering]

[barks]

[bear squeaks]

[beeping]

[beeping]

[beeps]

[bees buzzing]

[bell jingles]

[Bertie and Speckle moaning]

[Bertie and Tuca scream]

[Bertie gasps]

[Bertie giggling]

[Bertie groans]

[Bertie growls]

[Bertie grunting]

[Bertie mouths woman's dialogue] Oh, Geoffrey! You came!

[Bertie mumbles]

[Bertie panting]

[Bertie pants]

[Bertie pants]

[Bertie pants]

[Bertie wails]

[Bertie wails]

[Bertie] "Meet me by the berry stand."

[Bertie] Ah, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit,

[Bertie] And that's Mint Jelly Beach. A little rich for my blood.

[Bertie] And then my apprenticeship at the bakery starts tonight.

[Bertie] Bleh!

[Bertie] First, I'll dress to impress.

[Bertie] He'll brush his teeth while I grab the condoms,

[Bertie] Hmm.

[Bertie] Holy shit!

[Bertie] I give up!

[Bertie] I told her to stop drinking. I told her it was too much.

[Bertie] I was kinda thinking the same thing.

[Bertie] I'm completely normal.

[Bertie] I've been a data processor at Conde Nest for three years.

[Bertie] Let me check up on her real quick.

[Bertie] Oh, no.

[Bertie] Okay, Bertie, you're not nervous.

[Bertie] The world's baking elite dine on the finest foods,

[Bertie] Tuca!

[Bertie] Tuca?

[Bertie] Well, good thing you can always spend the holidays with me and Speckle.

[Bertie] Yeah?

[Bertie] You should just call him.

[Bertie] Your templates made it really nice in here.

[Betrie sighs]

[big band instrumental flourish plays]

[bleats]

[bleats]

[bleats]

[blows nose] I suck?

[blows raspberry] Now I'm gonna go fuck myself!

[bongo drums play]

[both bawl]

[both cheer]

[both gasp]

[both gasp]

[both gasp]

[both giggling]

[both groan]

[both growl]

[both grunt]

[both grunting]

[both grunting]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both laughing]

[both laughing]

[both laughing]

[both moan]

[both moaning]

[both pant]

[both scream]

[both sob]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalize]

[both vocalizing]

[both whistling]

[both] Inside my hamper 'cause there's always candy in a pocket somewhere!

[both] Tuca.

[both] Whoo!

[boy laughs]

[breathes deeply]

[burps]

[burps] I'm feeling great.

[buzzes]

[buzzes]

[buzzes]

[buzzes]

[buzzing]

[buzzing]

[car beeps]

[cars honking]

[cats meow]

[cell phone chirps]

[chanting] Sex bug! Sex bug!

[chants] Cabin! Cabin!

[chants] Usual way! Usual way! Usual way!

[cheerful music plays]

[cheerful music plays]

[cheerful music plays]

[cheering]

[cheering]

[cheering]

[chittering, barking]

[chittering, barking]

[choir singing]

[chomping loudly]

[chuckles awkwardly]

[chuckles uncomfortably]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles] Bra joke!

[chuckles] Don't put me in soup. I belong in tea!

[chuckles] Guilty as charged.

[chuckles] Hey!

[chuckles] I knew Tuca and I had a common bond.

[chuckles] I love Molting season.

[chuckles] I'm trying to perfect the process of making a roux from bananas.

[chuckles] Ow!

[chuckles] So...

[chuckles] Sounds like Tuca.

[chuckles] That sounds like an awkward convo!

[chuckles] That was my toilet purse.

[chuckles] To the crünt!

[chuckles] Uh, just kidding.

[chuckles] Why don't you show me what you like to watch?

[chuckles] Wow, Auntie, you're really roasting me hard tonight.

[chuckles] Yes, except bagels.

[chuckles] Yes, I know all these people, but I love a good recap.

[chuckles] Yes, you can watch the new Nests of Netherfield.

[chuckles] You should cover that. It's not appropriate work attire.

[chuckles] You're so lazy.

[clanging noise]

[classical music plays]

[clears throat]

[clears throat]

[clears throat]

[clears throat]

[clears throat]  Chef, are you sure?

[clears throat] ...is what the old me would have said.

[clears throat] But that is no longer who I am.

[clears throat] I just wanna reiterate that stuff

[clears throat] So, if that weird bulge turns out to be cancer,

[clears throat] There once was a slovenly and stubborn bird named St. Oriole.

[clears throat] We don't do that here, the whole apology thing.

[clerk] Hey!

[Coach Maple] Ka kaw!

[computer] Jerk it!

[computer] Jerk! Jerk!

[computer] Ultra climax!

[coworkers murmur in agreement]

[cries loudly]

[cries]

[cries]

[cries]

[cries]

[cries]

[cries] I'm sorry!

[crowd applauds]

[crowd cheering]

[crowd cheers and applauds]

[crowd cheers]

[crowd cheers]

[crowd cheers]

[crowd gasps]

[crowd gasps]

[crowd groans]

[crows]

[crows]

[crows] [squeaks]

[crunches] Mm mm mm!

[cymbals crashing]

[Dakota giggling] Oh!

[dance music playing]

[dance music playing]

[dance music playing]

[dance music playing]

[dance music playing]

[dialing, line rings]

[dialing, line rings]

[dings]

[DirtyGoat] Hey, don't stop! I'm not finished!

[discordant music playing]

[distorted audio]

[distorted electronic music plays]

[distorted] ♪ Go! ♪

[distorted] ♪ Go! ♪

[distorted] ♪ Go! ♪

[distorted] ♪ Go! ♪

[distorted] ♪ Go! ♪

[distorted] Medic!

[dogs barking]

[door closes]

[door opens and closes]

[dramatic music plays]

[driver screams]

[eagle screeches]

[echoing]

[echoing] No, no, no...

[electricity crackles]

[electricity zaps]

[electronic voice sings] ♪ Little bird, put your pants on ♪

[EMT grunts]

[EMT] We have to pump her stomach.

[engine starts]

[engine starts]

[exclaims]

[exclaims]

[exclaims]

[exclaims] But why?

[exclaims] Focus!

[exhales]

[exhales]

[exhales]

[exhales]

[exhales]

[exhales] I feel so guilty about this.

[eyeball clattering]

[fanfare plays]

[fanfare plays]

[fanfare]

[flies buzzing]

[footsteps approach]

[Fran cries]

[funk music playing]

[funk music playing]

[gags]

[gags] Health code violation!

[Gamby whoops and laughs]

[Gamby] Now, would you drink some gin and club soda

[Gamby] Speckle, sliding down your throat tickles!

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps] [coughs]

[gasps] A sex cult?

[gasps] Bertie, the window's open! Look!

[gasps] Bitch, no!

[gasps] Bleh!

[gasps] Everything else is garbage compared to this!

[gasps] Girl Thingz?

[gasps] He remembers me.

[gasps] Is that what I think it is?

[gasps] It looks just like Bertie.

[gasps] It must be true!

[gasps] It's Bertie!

[gasps] Murder!

[gasps] My favorite kind of rich.

[gasps] Oh, my God! Look at us with our shoe based coping mechanisms!

[gasps] Oh, my!

[gasps] Oh!

[gasps] Pastry Pete!

[gasps] That looks serious! Maybe you should go see a doctor.

[gasps] That's a billion dollar idea, both practical and delicious.

[gasps] The Bread Bowl!

[gasps] The grand hall.

[gasps] What?

[gasps] Why is everyone attacking me today?

[gasps] You should take him to the glow worm exhibit.

[ghost cackling]

[gibbers]

[giggles]

[giggles]

[giggles]

[giggling] Mm hmm.

[girls laugh]

[glass shattering]

[goose honks]

[goose honks]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans] ...good night.

[groans] I'm so sick of this song!

[groans] It's a roller coaster!

[groans] Jeremy, stick to the script.

[groans] Never mind!

[groans] Ow!

[groans] So why didn't you give her your sugar?

[groans] Swimming is terrible!

[growling]

[growling]

[growls]

[growls]

[growls]

[growls]

[grumbles angrily]

[grumbles, grunts]

[grumbles]

[grumbles]

[grunt and gibbers]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting] ...and gets hard.

[grunting] Whoo!

[grunts and howls]

[grunts snd gibbers]

[grunts, screams]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts] [yells]

[grunts] [yells]

[grunts] Follow me.

[grunts] Found the leek.

[grunts] Hey, Pastry Puff!

[grunts] Hey.

[grunts] Okey dokey, all done.

[grunts] Scram!

[grunts] Take that!

[grunts] This... is... the... worst!

[gulls squawk]

[hammering]

[harp music playing]

[hawk screeching]

[heart monitor beeping]

[heart monitor beeping]

[hisses]

[hissing]

[Holland hums]

[honks]

[horn blares]

[horn blares]

[howl continues]

[howling]

[huffs]

[humming]

[humming]

[hydraulics hiss]

[imitating vacuum]

[in deep voice] And you're gonna pay!

[in indistinct accent] Because I vinted to learn English.

[in Italian accent] Dante, come and give your grandma some kisses.

[in Italian accent] Oh, is that you? My Chef Dante?

[indistinct chatter]

[inhaling]

[inhaling]

[jaguar growls]

[jaguar roars]

[jazz music plays]

[keyboard clicks]

[keypad clicks]

[kissing]

[knock on door]

[knocking on door]

[knocking on door]

[knocking on door]

[knuckles crack loudly]

[laughing]

[laughing]

[laughing]

[laughing]

[laughing]

[laughing] We have a lot of goldfish!

[laughing] Wow!

[laughs maniacally] Die, turtle!

[laughs nervously] These are hot little suckers, aren't they?

[laughs, sighs] I'll just shower real quick.

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs] [grunts]

[laughs] Ah!

[laughs] Empathy is over!

[laughs] Great.

[laughs] I better get him home.

[laughs] Just kidding!  I already did.

[laughs] Just kidding.

[laughs] Milled wood?

[laughs] Must be some kind of villain.

[laughs] Oh, perfect!

[laughs] Oh, Tuca, I love how you brag on me.

[laughs] Oh, Tuca!

[laughs] Oh! Did I hit a nerve?

[laughs] Perfect.

[laughs] That would be so fun, Tuca, but I should probably handle it myself.

[laughs] This is great.

[laughs] True.

[laughs] Uh, my boyfriend and I might be buying a house.

[laughs] What a playful guy!

[laughs] Who's dying?

[laughs] Whoa, hey. I was just kidding around.

[laughs] Yeah, that's right, computer. He is a jerk!

[laughs] Yes!

[laughs] You know it, Dirk!

[laughter]

[low resonating]

[man grunts]

[man in video] I made you some oven fries.

[man over computer] Oh, come suck me off, you nasty bird!

[man screams]

[man] Boxer versus raptor, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na!

[man] Boxer versus raptor, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na!

[man] Boxer versus raptor, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na!

[man] Boxer versus raptor, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na!

[man] Boxer versus raptor, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na!

[man] Boxer versus raptor, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na!

[man] Boxer versus raptor, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na!

[man] Boxer versus raptor! Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na!

[man] Boxer versus raptor.

[man] Don't forget your shit!

[man] Thanks, buddy.

[man] Whoo!

[mellow jazz music playing]

[metal clanking]

[mic feedback rings]

[mirror] What slob You suck, stupid.

[moaning continues]

[moaning]

[moaning]

[moaning]

[moans] So hot!

[mouse clicks]

[muffled screams]

[muffled] My gamby is a cake now?

[muffled] Okay.

[mumbles incoherently]

[mumbling]

[music playing on TV]

[music playing]

[music slows]

[music stops]

[music stops]

[narrator] Here we see the male robin and female song thrush

[narrator] The face and brains of the Plumeco Featherette Collection

[nervous chuckle] Yeah, if this doesn't work out,

[Nicola's mother] I swear to heavens, Nicola,

[Nicola] And such is the beauty of life.

[objects crash]

[ominous music swells]

[oven dings]

[oven timer dings]

[owl hooting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting] Almost up to 30,000...

[panting] Coach Mered aple

[pants]

[pants]

[pants]

[pants]

[pants]

[pants]

[pants]

[pants]

[pants] I got here as fast as I could.

[pants] I wanna taste you!

[pants] Whoo!

[pants] Woo!

[passes gas]

[passes gas]

[Pastry Pete] I made you, and I can ruin you.

[Pastry Pete] I made... made... made...

[Pastry Pete] Learned what you could, enjoyed the attention,

[Pat] No, like that. Yeah, that's good.

[pen clicks]

[people clamoring and screaming]

[Pete grunting]

[Pete grunts]

[Pete] Bertie, are you in there?

[Pete] The perfect egg is crucial,

[phone buzzes and whistles]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone clicking, whooshing]

[phone whooshes]

[phones ring]

[pop music playing]

[pop music plays]

[pop music plays]

[pop music plays]

[quietly] Oh, God, why!

[radio host] Welcome to Breakfast Talk. I'm your host, Billy Eggs.

[retches]

[retches]

[retching continues]

[retching]

[riders scream]

[ringing]

[roars]

[roars]

[roars]

[roars]

[roars]

[roars]

[rock music playing]

[rock music plays]

[rock music plays]

[rock music riff plays]

[rooster crows]

[scoffs] Bird Town needs another bakery

[scoffs] It's called competition, sweetheart.

[scoffs] It's no mystery.

[screaming continues]

[screaming]

[screaming]

[screaming] And you need to be honest and open

[screams, panting]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams] Abby, what are you doing?

[screams] Bertie! Ugh!

[screams] My mush!

[screams] No!

[screams] No!

[screams] Now, my face is just a mush with holes in it!

[screams] Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet!

[screams] What?! It's happening!

[screeches]

[sensual music plays]

[sex bugs chanting] Sex bugs! Sex bugs! Sex bugs!

[shouts]

[shrieks, grunts]

[shushing]

[sighs loudly]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs] Good night, Tuca.

[sighs] I looked up to you.

[sighs] I'm so exhausted.

[sighs] I'm so sorry.

[sighs] Just set a good example, give some bullshit advice,

[sighs] Maybe my auntie is right.

[sighs] Settle down, Gamby.

[sighs] So, this is a low flow toilet with a beautiful, leathery smell.

[sighs] Thanks, dude.

[sighs] Tuca,  what do you want me to say?

[sighs] Tuca, I know you just went through surgery,

[sighs] Well, I'm not one to pass up a good freeze.

[sighs] What now?

[sighs] You can do this, Tuca.

[sighs] You look nice.

[sighs] You put your phone inside the dough instead of chocolate.

[sighs] You're right.

[singing off key] ♪ Molting night ♪

[singing]

[siren wails]

[siren wails]

[ska music playing]

[slug groans]

[slurping]

[slurps]

[smacks lips]

[snarls]

[snarls]

[sneezes]

[sniffing]

[sniffling]

[sniffs and sighs]

[sniffs]

[sniffs] Mm!

[snores]

[snores]

[snores]

[snoring continues]

[snoring continues]

[snorting]

[snorts and squeals]

[sobbing]

[sobs]

[sobs] Caawaaa!

[song ends]

[song ends]

[Speckle growls]

[Speckle imitating vacuum]

[Speckle mimicking Tuca] Hey, boys! Look at me shake my thing!

[Speckle retches]

[Speckle slurring] ♪ It's Tuca & Speckle Day ♪

[Speckle snores]

[Speckle] And everything inside looks so warm and yellow,

[Speckle] Gamby Robin was very sweet, so we mixed her with sugar.

[Speckle] Hey, Bertie. We lost the house.

[Speckle] Hey, uh, I realize this is all happening much faster than we thought.

[Speckle] Hey, what was the name  of that movie we watched

[Speckle] Hmm...

[Speckle] Hmm...

[Speckle] Hmm...

[Speckle] It was called Young Bird Abducted.

[Speckle] It's been in our family for generations.

[Speckle] What?

[Speckle] Wow!

[spitting]

[splashes]

[squawking]

[squawks]

[squawks]

[squawks]

[squeaks]

[squeals and giggles]

[squeals]

[squeals] So pretty!

[Stallion] Are you there? Hello? Hello?

[Stallion] But we've been dating since high school.

[stammers]

[stammers] I mean, you don't need to.

[stepping and clapping in beat]

[stepping, clapping,  and popping gum in beat]

[stutters nervously]

[surf rock guitar riff plays]

[Tallulah chuckles]

[Tallulah] Don't you worry, sweetie.

[Tallulah] Good? The heat was on and off.

[Tallulah] Many times!

[Tallulah] That's just like your mama not to wear a seat belt.

[tambourine rattling]

[teens laugh]

[Terry] Hey, dummy.

[theme music plays]

[theme music plays]

[theme music plays]

[theme song  plays]

[theme song ends]

[theme song ends]

[theme song ends]

[theme song ends]

[theme song ends]

[theme song ends]

[theme song ends]

[theme song playing]

[theme song playing]

[theme song plays]

[theme song plays]

[theme song plays]

[theme song plays]

[tires screech]

[tires screeching]

[toilet flushes]

[train horn sounds]

[triumphant fanfare plays]

[Tuca and Bertie laughing]

[Tuca burps]

[Tuca groans]

[Tuca groans]

[Tuca grunting]

[Tuca grunts]

[Tuca laughs]

[Tuca moans]

[Tuca pants]

[Tuca snickers]

[Tuca snoring]

[Tuca] Auntie, is my mom gonna be okay?

[Tuca] Excellent choice of boob.

[Tuca] It's true, we didn't have a lot of money,

[Tuca] Mm hmm...

[Tuca] No!

[Tuca] Now you're settling down, doing this normie life plan bullshit,

[Tuca] Ow!

[Tuca] Roar, roar!

[Tuca] That's dope.

[Tuca] This is my sad moan.

[Tuca] We've got cereal, or eggs, or fish, or cake.

[Tuca] Whoa, Bertie! Watch out!

[Tuca] Wootus!

[turtle screams]

[Ultra Sam] I love you, baby. Let's get out of here!

[unzips zipper]

[vocalizing]

[vocalizing]

[whimpering]

[whimpering]

[whimpers]

[whines]

[whirring]

[whispers] Hey, do you think the sugar is on one of these guys?

[whispers] I never will.

[whispers] I'm sorry.

[whispers] It's Tuesday.

[whistle blows]

[whistles blows]

[whistles]

[whistling tune]

[whistling]

[whistling]

[whooping]

[wind blowing]

[woman chuckles] Of course it's haunted, come on!

[woman grunts]

[woman in video moans]

[woman on radio] It's a tale as old as time. Boy meets girl.

[woman on recording] Start small. Take things step by step.

[woman over PA] Attention Fowl Foods shoppers!

[woman screams]

[woman screams]

[woman screams]

[woman] By throwing out the clutter, you make room for things you love most.

[woman] I don't know why you trifle with me, Lord Wilkshire.

[woman] I'm telling you, Duffy, the bones just suck up cellulite!

[woman] Keep anything that fills you with elation and happy memories.

[woman] Nicola, stop peeping and come eat your sheep pudding and smashy peas!

[woman] Oh, excuse me. I'm on the phone.

[woman] So, Duffy tells me I have something caught on my beak,

[woman] What's the difference between regular broth and bone broth?

[yawns]

[yawns]

[yawns] Dear Bertie, what's happening?

[yells]

[yells] Mom!

[yelps]

[yelps]

♪ 'Cause I trip, grab it Up again and at it ♪

♪ 'Cause if you stop now You're gonna croak, croak ♪

♪ Accidentally break a vase with my face ♪

♪ Against the world ♪

♪ All is calm ♪

♪ And even more ♪

♪ And when this song ends More time with your best friend ♪

♪ And when this song ends... ♪

♪ At this venue exclusive for baking ♪

♪ Baby Bertie, Bertie baby Bay Ber bee tee ♪

♪ Barb Bar Bar, Ba Barb Barb Barb ♪

♪ Bertie ertie ertie Getting sugar for her nae ♪

♪ Bertie ertie ertie Gotta get that dough rolled ♪

♪ Best friend Party with your best friend... ♪

♪ Best friend, best friend ♪

♪ Best friend, best friend ♪

♪ Best friend, best friend ♪

♪ Best friend, best friend Best friends with your best friend ♪

♪ Best friend, best friend Nothing without your best friend ♪

♪ Best friends with your ♪

♪ Best friends with your best friend Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Big bossy Ja sä valit set sen ♪

♪ But I'm fine ♪

♪ Can't stop, won't stop That's the motto ♪

♪ Clean it up, clean it up Clean up the crap ♪

♪ Clock, tick tock Clock, ding dong, yeah ♪

♪ Clock, tick tock Clock, ding dong, yeah ♪

♪ Come on, little Bertie Gotta make those sweet rolls ♪

♪ Could possibly protect you You know what it means ♪

♪ Crush it, little Bertie Win back that ash bowl ♪

♪ Dirt dirt dirt dirt dirt dirty turtie ♪

♪ Dirt dirt dirt dirty That dirt... ♪

♪ Dirt dirt dirt dirty turtie ♪

♪ Doesn't matter what I do 'Cause I live alone ♪

♪ Doing my thing, I do my thing Who you kidding? ♪

♪ Enjoy the moment while it lasts Like a bubbly bubble ♪

♪ Everybody's gonna jump, jump ♪

♪ Everybody's gonna jump, jump, jump ♪

♪ Everywhere we go, I'll bring the city Something it ain't never had before ♪

♪ Feathers falling all around ♪

♪ Feed the fire in your heart ♪

♪ Feels like I ate a monster truck ♪

♪ For fame, to look jovious To, to... ♪

♪ For so many reasons ♪

♪ Get 'em up, get 'em up Get 'em up now ♪

♪ Get, get to work ♪

♪ Get, get to work ♪

♪ Gettin' a joint account With my motherfucking jaguar ♪

♪ Gettin' a joint account With my motherfucking jaguar ♪

♪ Gimme, gimme, gimme Gimme my sugar high ♪

♪ Give me some more ♪

♪ Going on a date Now I'm in the zone ♪

♪ Going outside ♪

♪ Going outside ♪

♪ Got some random crap for my place ♪

♪ Gotta cook some stuff To fill up people's face holes ♪

♪ Gotta get a lamp for this base ♪

♪ Gotta get to work ♪

♪ Gotta get to work ♪

♪ Holy night ♪

♪ How'd it get so mental In my apartment o? ♪

♪ I can't stand this loss of control ♪

♪ I dream of kissing you ♪

♪ I feel like a shrimp being shucked ♪

♪ I feel my uncontrollable fear Makes it impossible to stay here ♪

♪ I feel so scared and vulnerable ♪

♪ I finally made it to Yeast Week ♪

♪ I hope everything's okay I left my phone in the car ♪

♪ I just drop regret it Now my credit started going up ♪

♪ I just wanna keep it real Hauskaa ♪

♪ I like my future Because it looks so fun to me ♪

♪ I love the dreams in my sleep It's so important to me ♪

♪ I want you to give me some more ♪

♪ I will never let you down ♪

♪ I'd go get it now But I'm lazy and it's too far ♪

♪ I'd rather be dead ♪

♪ I'll grind till I get signed Name on the dotted line ♪

♪ I'm driving through the poison muck ♪

♪ I'm going crazy and losing my shit ♪

♪ I'm gonna divorce my husband ♪

♪ I'm hooked on you, doo wha, doo wha ♪

♪ I'm just showing' out by showin' up ♪

♪ I'm just your crash, smash dummy That you bash in your back seat ♪

♪ I'm losing my grip Yeah, it's panic season ♪

♪ I'm losing my shit right now ♪

♪ I'm not ready ♪

♪ I'm tearing it up I'm shit outta luck ♪

♪ I've got the whole world By the tip of my beak ♪

♪ In time, I'll be rap genius They'll see me as young Einstein ♪

♪ Inside myself and getting stuck ♪

♪ Is this the end? ♪

♪ It hurts too much to face this fear now Without a friend ♪

♪ It'll be so hot, we'll totally bone ♪

♪ It's a shame, it's a shame No, I'm not a dame ♪

♪ It's like a dream But I've been awakened ♪

♪ It's Molting season, Molting season ♪

♪ It's Tuca & Speckle Day! ♪

♪ It's Tuca & Speckle Day! ♪

♪ It's Tuca & Speckle Day! ♪

♪ It's you and me forever ♪

♪ It's you and me You and me together ♪

♪ Junkyard remix that you throw Onto your girl, you ho ♪

♪ Just a little more ♪

♪ Just wait, don't start yet ♪

♪ Just you and me You and me forever ♪

♪ Keep quiet, now ♪

♪ Kohti taivaa Ei mitään vaivaa ♪

♪ La la la ♪

♪ La la la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la, la la la ♪

♪ La, la, la... ♪

♪ Lady, it's not our fault That you're clearly insane ♪

♪ Lately, I been out my mind ♪

♪ Let go of tomorrow and the past ♪

♪ Let's keep it gold And keep it quiet, now ♪

♪ Little bird, put your pants on ♪

♪ Living my life without vaivaa ♪

♪ Look at these dang assholes Making fun of my pain ♪

♪ Making nights so bright and sparkly ♪

♪ Making nights so bright and sparkly Molting time, it's Molting time ♪

♪ Maybe ♪

♪ Maybe if you saw us kiss in my dreams ♪

♪ Maybe it's just this effed up world ♪

♪ Maybe we ♪

♪ Maybe we need ♪

♪ Maybe we need ♪

♪ Maybe we need a break ♪

♪ Maybe we need a break ♪

♪ Maybe we need a Maybe we ♪

♪ Maybe we'll find matching slacks ♪

♪ Me and my girls, we gettin' down ♪

♪ Mental health is as important As brushing your teeth ♪

♪ Might wanna try drugs or therapy ♪

♪ Mikä jut tu Mikä blow ♪

♪ Molting season Feathers falling, feathers falling ♪

♪ Molting season, Molting season... ♪

♪ Molting time, it's Molting time ♪

♪ My motherfucking jaguar ♪

♪ Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na ♪

♪ No niin! No niin! ♪

♪ No niin! No niin! ♪

♪ No words, only scream ♪

♪ Nobody gets what they want anymore ♪

♪ Nobody gets what they want anymore ♪

♪ Oh, piece by piece And now I'm fucked ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ On my motherfucking jaguar ♪

♪ One, two, three ♪

♪ Ooh, they make me gassy But I love spicy chips ♪

♪ Party with your best friend ♪

♪ Party with your best friend ♪

♪ Pick it up, pick it up, pick up the junk How did I get so much sticky ass gunk? ♪

♪ Putting freaky things in the space ♪

♪ Reaching up, up, up For the taivaa ♪

♪ Ridin' around town On my motherfucking jaguar ♪

♪ Right now ♪

♪ Savor it, zone it Päästä let go ♪

♪ Searchin' for ways to get ya Yeah, I need to get you fast ♪

♪ Seize the moment that you want ♪

♪ Set in motion what you got ♪

♪ Shakin' up the scene again I'm snatching at your hands ♪

♪ She should stay in bed Or take some kind of meds ♪

♪ She's losing her grip But we don't give a shit ♪

♪ She's sick in the head ♪

♪ Shoo goo ♪

♪ Sippin' on the money Like drippin' gelato ♪

♪ Smashin' away for dollars Same as you, I got a man ♪

♪ Snakes, earthquakes Blood and hurricanes ♪

♪ So let's take flight ♪

♪ So what? Baby, I'm hot ♪

♪ So what? Baby, I'm hot ♪

♪ So, I can't help it ♪

♪ Soak in it, own it Nautti indulge ♪

♪ Sounds like general anxiety ♪

♪ Speckle won't answer his phone And Tuca's gone, I'm all alone ♪

♪ Spicy chips Mm, spicy chips ♪

♪ St. Oriole's dropping sweets tonight ♪

♪ Sure, I got my share of ongelmia ♪

♪ Sweet sugar being got By the hottie, Bertie bae ♪

♪ Templates ♪

♪ Templates ♪

♪ Templates ♪

♪ Templates! ♪

♪ Than be here losing my shit ♪

♪ That dirt dirt dirt dirty turtie ♪

♪ That that that that, that that that that Dirt dirt dirt dirty turtie ♪

♪ There is no blame There is no shame ♪

♪ There's nothing wrong with me ♪

♪ Third wheel, third wheel Cookin' some food ♪

♪ Third wheel, third wheel Gonna taste good! ♪

♪ Till I grow like a flower through the asphalt ♪

♪ Tony had it goin' on Did it all in the name of the game ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Bertie & Tuca and Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Tuca ♪ ♪ And Bertie ♪

♪ Turn around, bend over Close your eyes ♪

♪ Twerk it down low ♪

♪ Uh, there are too many fears to name ♪

♪ We don't play, we never ♪

♪ We drank some drinks And then I fell on the floor ♪

♪ We need a ♪

♪ We'll look at houses and eat snacks ♪

♪ We're sexy ass bugs ♪

♪ We're sexy, sexy sex bugs Sexy, sexy sex bugs ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪

♪ Win win, no loss ♪

♪ Woo! ♪

♪ Wootus! ♪

♪ Y'all need to set your watch After my clock ♪

♪ Y'all need to set your watch After my clock ♪

♪ Y'all need to set your watch After my clock ♪

♪ Y'all need to set your watch After my clock ♪

♪ Yeah, I'm in the building ♪

♪ Yeah, it's looking good ♪

♪ Yeah, it's looking good ♪

♪ Yeah, it's looking good ♪

♪ Yeah, it's looking good ♪

♪ Yeast Week! ♪

♪ Yeast Week! ♪

♪ Yoga and meditation are key ♪

♪ You gotta stroke, stroke, stroke So you can float, float, float ♪

♪ You know as well as I They are tervetuloa ♪

♪ You'd have to say it out loud Before you know ♪

♪ You're pullin' up my underwear And grabbin' at my ass ♪