Never Have I Ever (2020) - Season 1 Edit

A beaver is kind of a weird choice, Prashant.

A couple of my friends and I are going to a fundraiser

A fashion emergency?

A fashion segment on The Today Show

A great idea, as always.

A Greek foreign exchange student named Stavros,

A higher number. Even better!

A husband from India? Someone I've never met before.

A Model UN trip to UC Davis might seem like a real drag.

A mother deserted,

A place I usually consider a safe haven from my nemeses.

A ride sharing app to help the **** escape the Nazis?

A shelf? A table?

A they/them down before.

A week ago, Devi and her mom had an epic blowout

A week later...

About how hard it's been for us here, especially with family being so far away

About to pleasure each other.

Absolutely!

Actually, I do.

Actually, I don't think that's a good idea anymore.

Actually, I don't think that's a good idea anymore.

Actually, I just realized that I got a lot of homework to do,

Actually, I've been talking to someone else.

Actually, it looks like we're gonna have to have one foursome.

Actually, it was Model U

Actually, it's 91403.

After breaking the window with its body?

After Nalini said they were relocating to India.

After Nick Jonas married an Indian woman that wasn't you.

After she finished her studies abroad,

After the supernatural occurrence in her backyard,

After you get married, you move to the United States,

Again, that is why China is beating us.

Again? Dude.

Ah, okay. I do not like high fiving. It's violent.

Ah, yes. I think it's that time.

Ah.

Alex, as appealing as that date sounds,

All a family can do is just point you in the right direction.

All right, but you have somewhat of a difficult personality as well.

All right, gals. How we doing?

All right, next group.

All right, wait. Lil' D or Coyote Girl? What are we going with?

All right? The photographer's already here, paid for.

All right. Check me out.

All right. I guess it's good that I slapped you

All right. It's very late.

All right. My girl.

All right. Well, my mom knew her and talked to her and stuff,

All right. Well, my mom will be home soon, so... better get to it.

All sons. Fingers crossed.

All that to say,

All the classics. You name it, she can cook it.

All the sneaking around, all the whispered phone calls.

All we did was kiss.

All while volunteering at the kidney dialysis center.

Almond butter fudge? Are you trying to kill someone?

Almost makes me blush.

Also known as my mother.

Also, her mom basically called me stupid,

Also, I'm sorry if I messed things up for you and Paxton.

Also, why do we have to commemorate everything on social media?

Also, you look cool in that outfit.

Although I've never been on the highway before,

Although the college counselor Susan is a joke.

Amen.

An acceptance letter from the college of her dreams...

An actress dating tech crew?

An aspiring actress, who abandoned Eleanor when she was seven.

An unmarried sister who's crippled and has no job.

And What are you doing here?

And a boy at school said that I was an un

And a member of the UN,

And a time to share warm moments with family.

And alcohol seems to make Ben Gross nice.

And also her heart rate.

And also, I'm scared of your mom.

And also, of course, where your daughter is.

And am a proud member of this vibrant community.

And another woman whose husband had fallen off the ship.

And anyone else who supports the United States

And as far as she could tell,

And as it turned out,

And as much as I like Jughead,

And as precise as McEnroe return to pull off this heist.

And as the owner of the number two home security company in San Jose area,

And ask if you wanted to hang out later?

And became paralyzed.

And being bitten by a coyote.

And Ben realized he left his AirPods back in the hotel room.

And boy, do they love to talk.

And could actually have a boyfriend.

And decided to fight back with her spirit, AKA she would be serving a damn look.

And definitely hasn't yelled at us for no reason.

And Devi just got home.

And Devi needs you.

And doesn't give a shit about her real friends,

And doesn't that make her an even better friend,

And don't screw it up, yeah?

And don't tell your parents. Okay?

And Equity member, Joyce Wong,

And even give you his phone number to make sure you get home okay.

And even if it were,

And even though this family dinner featured humiliation, bickering, threats,

And fake rapper Andy Samberg.

And figure out what the future holds for the two of them.

And food that was far too spicy,

And for letting me use your washing machine.

And for their engagement to be over.

And for what it's worth, I did come up with a slogan.

And found everyone chopped up into little pieces by a murderer?

And frankly, without your father around, I just...

And furthermore,

And Garret Von Kaenel,

And get back to discussing actual worthwhile Rick and Morty theories?

And get sex back on the agenda.

And god will always see that.

And going forward,

And had left Ben Gross's face looking pretty gross.

And handsome, and surprisingly good at mini golf,

And having a great time, and it made me think,

And he and Devi had been vying for the number one spot in the class

And he asked me to blow on some pizza.

And he did kind of just break into the house.

And he had one of the nastiest pimples I've ever seen in my career.

And he has really great insight on that thing with your mom.

And he says he needs me there.

And he's so into being Native American.

And hello to you, Gears Brosnan.

And her friends knew she was a liar.

And honestly, all I want to do is eat a doughnut,

And honestly, I can't believe she's using my dad's ashes like that.

And honestly, I'm mature enough to be on my own.

And honestly, Rick and Morty themselves have a huge age gap,

And I am American actor, producer, writer,

And I am legendary tennis player, John McEnroe.

And I am taking this to my room. Don't need you distracted today.

And I appreciate you being my first boyfriend, but

And I can basically forget about all that bad stuff that happened before.

And I don't have anyone to talk to about it.

And I don't need that kinda negative energy in my life.

And I expect you to be in bed by then.

And I have a date after school.

And I have new listing off of Moorpark

And I honestly can't commit full time to this group

And I know you'd never be my boyfriend,

And I like Devi.

And I love this for me. Finally, a gay friend.

And I promise to be a better friend from now on.

And I saw my dad run over our cat.

And I think you might be right.

And I thought the house could do with a little touch of elegance.

And I was like... [regular voice] Yeah. I mean, sure.

And I wronged you, and I'm sorry, and I don't expect you to just forgive me,

And I'll be right back.

And I'm not interesting just because my dad died.

And I'm not lost.

And I'm not talking about director Paul Thomas Anderson.

And I'm using the oven as my closet right now.

And I've actually run out of things for you to do.

And idiots are banging all the time.

And if Devi came clean now,

And if left to their own devices,

And if this doesn't work, you can always prescribe me some Klonopin.

And if you'll let me, I want to be the mom that you deserve.

And if you're down with it,

And incredibly disrespectful, I...

And insert herself into their family drama.

And is that...

And it actually went okay.

And it just got out of hand.

And it was legit my dad.

And it would be psycho to ask a guy she’s only kissed once

And it's her first day of sophomore year.

And just stay here with my baby boy.

And just want to watch cricket.

And lastly, most importantly,

And made fum of his electric car!

And make you feel good about yourself?

And married the guy that they chose.

And maybe we could put the money toward turning the AC on every once in a while.

And my co workers looked at me like I was a total Jerry.

And my girlfriend only likes me for my money.

And my instincts for parent stuff are usually pretty dead on.

And my monthly payment is quite high!

And no disrupting me between 7:30 and 7:45.

And not just my dad's client, Pitbull.

And now I am drenched in it.

And now it was time to come to the rescue of her other best friend.

And now she's in the drama room having a meltdown.

And now, her day was only about to get worse.

And now, she was in a wheelchair.

And on an unrelated note,

And our children could get married right here on this lawn.

And perform a one woman show dedicated to her.

And practice some alcohol based party games?

And ready to face a new day.

And sends a car to round them up.

And shake our fists at the skateboarders.

And she needed a win, even if it was a small one.

And she ran away to live with a family

And she seems to be reciprocating

And she wants you in her life.

And she'd already given them hope.

And she's already stressed out.

And she's good at this stuff, so it's like a guaranteed A.

And she's, like, known for competing in the National Spelling Bee.

And so is acting.

And some other people think I'm not Indian enough.

And sometimes, she's a straight up psycho,

And support all my resolutions.

And systemic racism is not litty.

And take advantage of your top notch Wi Fi.

And telling me how much he respected me and stuff.

And text your parents what an educational and safe time you're having.

And that she didn't think I liked her.

And that was gonna be awesome.

And that was pretty cool.

And that's how it happens, folks.

And the boy must leave now.

And the chin up.

And the Holocaust.

And the vino should be flowing freely.

And the whole gang at Sherman Oaks High School,

And the whole time, Paxton kept complimenting me

And their parents are okay with them taking showers together in their homes?

And then bringing shame on an innocent bird?

And then did God knows what with this boy in his car.

And then immediately blew us off.

And then Paxton literally pulls me aside, and is like...

And then pushing your friend into the pool,

And then suddenly, she knew exactly who this coyote was.

And then we can party like at spring break!

And then when I was drinking it, it got way worse.

And there is nothing that you could ever tell me

And they are so elite,

And they currently hated her,

And they have been three terrific months.

And they just like stayed in Paris. [laughs]

And they let me use the dishwasher.

And they threw their bra at you.

And think I'm a disgusting troll?

And this is Eleanor Wong, president of the drama club.

And this is your job?

And this morning, the woman Devi is shouting at.

And this other girl, Eve.

And this will be our fun ride...

And to make matters worse, it was a six hour drive,

And to your bodies.

And today was certainly not gonna change that.

And tonight, she wants me to clear the black widows out of our chimney.

And Trent, technically, knew her, then wasn't she invited?

And up the teacher's butt where it usually is.

And was gonna shoot her portfolio today,

And was invited to stay in their rock and roll themed guest room.

And watch the Home Shopping Network as entertainment.

And we don't want you to make a decision you're gonna regret forever.

And we probably should have done it a long time ago.

And we'll still just pretend I'm getting an arranged marriage.

And what are you laughing at, Erin Brockovich?

And what are you wearing?

And what's so special about this boy, anyway?

And when we come home later, I will fix this.

And when we grow old, we can sit on the porch

And while he and her mother stayed true to their Indian roots...

And while there might be no chance of romance anymore,

And who probably doesn't care about you

And why did Ben even care?

And why did you cry at my mom's office?

And why didn't you correct them?

And why should I? I don't deserve love.

And why would she tell Fabiola?

And will never find happiness.

And yes, it's in perfect condition, not one scratch.

And you brought California Brittle.

And you can get your septum pierced.

And you know how sad and lonely he is.

And you still don't want to talk about your father.

And you tell Mohan it's got a rain shower.

And you're all hating on it 'cause you are anti Semitic.

And you're trying to get rid of unnecessary junk like Dad.

And you're wondering if it's safe to go outside.

And your family is very...

And your girls too.

And, uh, do some, uh... some some science and other stuff.

And, um, I'm looking to put my house on the market.

And... [sighs] I don't know what to tell them.

Andrew here was just thinking of buying Dad's old moped.

Andy, did you see my mom leave?

Another thespian in the family.

Any idiot can play the guitar. It only has six strings.

Anybody else want Shira's ticket?

Anyhow, I hope you all found some clarity in your prayers today.

Anyone can come. Party at my house tonight.

Anyway, I'll be home by 11:00,

Anyway, if I did, that was just alcohol doing its thang.

Anyway, welcome back, Devi! Let's jam.

Anyway, you can give me a call or text. Whatever.

Anyways, I'm gonna go contour my nose before he sees me in class.

Anyways, that about does it for me.

Apparently, American workplaces need fun perks

Aravind might just hear him clomping around on the roof.

Aravind, behind me to my left. Kamala, to my right.

Aravind? We weren't expecting you till tomorrow morning.

Aravind.

Are truly vegetarian.

Are we allowed to say "dick" now?

Are we coupled up? Are we singies?

Are we doing margaritas,

Are you crazy?

Are you dead?

Are you financially independent?

Are you gonna be weird about this?

Are you kidding?

Are you leaving?

Are you not having one?

Are you okay, by the way?

Are you okay, kid?

Are you okay, sweetie?

Are you out of your goddamn mind? Forget it.

Are you out of your mind? You heard me say he was a Muslim.

Are you Princess Jasmine?

Are you saying that 'cause of your mobility issue?

Are you saying you don't want my uncle around every time we talk?

Are you serious? You're breaking up with me too?

Are you suicidal from Accutane?

Are you sure?

Are you sure? You're... bleeding.

Are you thinking about what Paxton said?

Aren't your parents gonna be pissed you threw a huge party here?

Areola. Hey.

AreolaGrande007?

Ariel's prettier.

Arlene, can you please turn up that music?

As a bonding exercise.

As a way to make herself more interesting to a bunch of admission committees.

As far as we know, it's not contagious.

As if they understood each other.

As if you have the deftness to play a double reed woodwind.

As long as it takes for her to finish her studies. Why?

As much as Devi wanted to be a chill girl that you could have sex with,

As my cousin would say, "That sucks a fat one."

As the paralyzed Indian girl,

As we travel through all of humanity's most horrific atrocities,

As you all know, Devi had a really bad year.

Aside from Mowgli.

Asking me if I was having sex with Devi Vishwakumar?

At a public high school in the Valley? Are you insane?

At Devi's spring orchestra concert,

At first, I was like, "You're away from your parents.

At home he was just another quiet, lonely kid.

At least drive the speed limit.

At least I can grow a mustache.

At least one of us looks cool.

At least she had a friend,

At least she said "nice" and "smart."

At school, she was grata as hell.

At the Honda Center.

At the University of Chicago,

Aw!

Awaiting the pity dinner to come,

Awesome.

Awesome. Let's see what you got, Lil' D.

Babe?

Baby girl, that's your grief.

Bad morning, enemy.

Basically, everyone I know is invited.

Be smilier.

Beat it, Vishwakumar.

Because after all, isn't friendship the most important

Because Devi and her friends were an ethnically diverse group

Because everybody is treated like they're special

Because from this point on,

Because he just wants to be friends.

Because he looks like a narc.

Because he's a socially progressive young man.

Because how's that supposed to make us size zeros feel?

Because I give up. I am done. She's too headstrong and doesn't listen.

Because I have a cousin in medical sales

Because I have a package coming that I need to sign for.

Because I have a very demanding social life.

Because I think that would help you heal.

Because I thought you might be into it.

Because I will push back.

Because I would be more than happy to not go to the Caribbean today...

Because I'm a failure.

Because I'm about to go get railed.

Because I'm embarrassed of her, or something?

Because I'm tough on her.

Because if you are, I'm not gonna talk about it.

Because it meant Trent did not know her real secret.

Because it's his birthday,

Because it's such a cool look

Because LA has the one thing no other town has:

Because my mom is about to toss my dad in the ocean,

Because she's a liar who committed postal fraud.

Because there's an overnight school event that would be great for my college resume.

Because they thought I was unhinged and would have a nervous breakdown.

Because we grew it here.

Because we're so close.

Because you Oh, my double God. You don't even have to say another word.

Because you are grounded until the day you graduate.

Because you don't look like a skank.

Because you shouldn't be bought and sold by your family like a prized calf.

Because you wanted them to think we were having sex.

Because you went straight up psycho and couldn't walk for three months.

Because you were drunk!

Because you will be dead.

Because you're you, and I'm me,

Becca, I thought you were at work.

Beer me. Love that bread soda.

Beer. You read my mind.

Before her mom had a chance to move her across the globe.

Before uprooting the whole family,

Before you called me a bitch!

Before you know it, we'll all be boinking at prom. Okay.

Being grounded, sneaking alcohol, hooking up?

Being Paxton's secret sidepiece

Ben could be in our group.

Ben felt on top of the world,

Ben Gross better get ready to eat his words.

Ben Gross's bar mitzvah was at the Dolby Theatre.

Ben Gross's father, Howard, whom he idolized,

Ben had two solid ride or dies.

Ben, I don't have time to listen to you pretend to have standards.

Ben, I know you were worried about us not having a full team,

Ben, I'm really sorry. I don't want Nazis to kill you.

Ben, it's so good to have you in my home,

Ben, what the hell?

Ben, you don't have to make up something sadder to make me feel better.

Ben! What the hell?

Ben's embarrassment had reached a fever pitch.

Benjamin, I hear you were on that last minute Model UN trip to Davis.

Benjamin, so good to see you.

Besides being pwned by your intellectual superior.

Between my family and a life of shame

Bird?

Birthday acknowledgment, Ben.

Blitzkrieg.

Boyfriend, here I co

Boyfriends are what high school is all about.

Break into your heart.

Breakfast in bed?

Brings your family back together?

Bubelah, you say the word,

Buckle up for some steamy teen romance.

Building taller and taller seawalls isn't doing anything

Bunkr."

Busted. You're a perv.

But also, I'm not going to tell them about this,

But also... I don't think I'm ready to get engaged today.

But Amanda is the lead.

But are allowed to have opinions about your life and all your shortcomings.

But because of me, Ms. Wong almost outed you to your mom.

But before I can rock your world, I need to freshen up.

But Ben seems like a good kid, so, happy to do it.

But both ended up at different high schools,

But can you imagine how dorky they would look doing this anywhere else?

But can you write latte on the cup?

But come on, look at this kid's jawline.

But Devi came in with no preparation and still became the talk of the weekend.

But Devi didn't want to use the story of her father's death

But Devi was determined.

But does it mean he wants to be your boyfriend?

But don't go to Nagasaki.

But Eleanor and I are on a friend break with Devi right now.

But even though she told her friends that Jonah was the one she was after,

But ever since he showed up at her house,

But everyone calls him Pandit Raj.

But God, whoever she is, is smiling on us today.

But he's been feeling insecure because Prashant is coming.

But her neck is kinda busted.

But hey, good luck on your engagement...

But hey, this was a rager. Maybe she wouldn't even see them.

But how hard could it be?

But I actually have a chore of my own that I have to do.

But I am trying.

But I did come to the drama room eventually.

But I did see her hesitate when she threw out all your favorite snacks.

But I have a duty to my family. I'm sorry.

But I have a good feeling about your mom.

But I know she loves you,

But I know that to live my life without regrets,

But I promise you I'm not with Steve anymore.

But I really, really miss you.

But I said I was sorry.

But I think I understand what you're getting at.

But I think it applies here too.

But I think my favorite part might be the ice cream.

But I understand if you want to go.

But I was wondering if you would ever consider...

But I will do my best.

But I won't do that.

But I'm also a Rick and Morty fan,

But I'm here for you guys.

But I'm here now.

But I'm kind of cool,

But I'm not going to marry him.

But I'm sort of a lone wolf.

But I'm stuck here.

But I'm young at heart, fam.

But if I haven't totally blown it,

But if she was gonna win her first major, she had to put her game face on.

But if the parents realized that Kevin got left behind,

But if you need more, just call.

But if you need your scripts, you need your scripts.

But in a good way.

But in the past, the competition between the two of you

But isn't this kind of normal for you?

But it didn't matter, because she had her squad.

But it finally occurred to me that I have to be in LA,

But it was different when I went to college.

But it's accurate.

But it's Ben's birthday,

But it's Dad's.

But it's just like a huge zit.

But it's not what it used to be.

But it's only because I am scared... all the time.

But just to be clear,

But just to be clear,

But let's just say she wouldn't get points for accuracy.

But letting it all hang out there left Ben feeling a little lighter

But maybe I'll just take a quick pass over your guys' section.

But maybe later this week?

But maybe she was confused. Whatever.

But maybe you would benefit from a different approach.

But my followers don't want to see Billy Crystal eating nachos or whatever.

But my forearms look like the frigging floor of a barber shop.

But my parents want me to be with someone else.

But no worries, the only game that mattered

But none of her coworkers showed up to help.

But not some nerd from one of AP classes.

But now all I can think about is hearing some harp.

But other than that, I don't get why he's so great.

But Paxton's words from the hospital were still echoing in her mind.

But people were still staring at me.

But please, just remember, today is Kamala's day,

But Prashant is just a formality to appease my parents.

But remember, sometimes Prashant will come home from work

But schools don't want another Indian try hard,

But she couldn't deny that there was something spooky going on here.

But she felt less than enthusiastic about this idea.

But she left them with the face painter

But she put on a happy face

But she shot up here like a frigging panther.

But she'd kill me if I came empty handed.

But she's gonna have to do more than send weak apology texts

But shortly after this barbecue,

But technically, he's not out yet, and he's pretty popular,

But thanks.

But that didn't matter to Ben,

But that doesn't give you a free pass to treat us like crap.

But that was Dad's garden. Why do I have to take care of it now?

But that was the Model UN equivalent of me throwing my racket at an umpire.

But that was... a revelation.

But that's not true.

But the truth is, I kinda miss puja.

But then he took me to their campus powwow.

But then would veer off, thinking about homework,

But then, she moves off screen.

But they don't need to know that... yet.

But things were about to get even worse.

But this is like the house they live in in The Bachelor.

But this new you can't be making you happy.

But this year was different.

But to a teen under house arrest,

But to be fair, he had said  she looked good at Ganesh Puja.

But today I didn't have it in me.

But ultimately, he was a friend.

But we make it work.

But we'll need a distraction.

But we've been dating for three months.

But what about your family?

But what happens if you get a part where you have to ride a motorcycle?

But what's that coming up on Wednesday?

But where to go?

But with working legs comes a whole host of new possibilities.

But wondered if she should correct these girls about her and Paxton.

But wouldn't rather sit in a more comfortable seat?

But wouldn't that be weird?

But you already gave it to me.

But you can't win 'em all.

But you dress like a helpful Honda guy.

But you have to come home to eat them.

But you have to.

But you left the spare key under the mat.

But you told me you'd go to the Clippers game,

But you want to marry that stranger downstairs?

But you, everyone loves you.

But you're so good at Mandarin.

But, like, thanks for not telling people I lied about us.

But... yeah, never mind. Forget about it.

By aiming a spotlight on me.

By burying it deep.

By the time the painter was done.

Bye, Ms. Wong.

Bye, queens.

Bye.

CalTech's not known for having great athletes.

Can consider themselves nuked too.

Can get with a guy like Paxton Hall Yoshida,

Can I ask you a question?

Can I ask you?

Can I get you a drink?

Can I get you a Gatorade?

Can I go to the nurse's office?

Can I help you?

Can I talk to you?

Can Paxton come?

Can she shed her old identity

Can we please not do that again?

Can you believe he said that?

Can you believe it?

Can you imagine watching Finding Nemo on this?

Can you just, like, stand normal?

Can you point me in the direction of the ladies' room?

Can't I have a little more time? I barely slept last night.

Can't risk it right now.

Can't wait to hit up Wetzel's P's with you this weekend.

Can't we vacation in Aspen like Ben's family?

Can't you be polite for just one evening?

Carbon emissions.

Chad.

Chips, hummus, and leftovers, and stuff.

Clear nail polish, please.

Clearly, this is touchy for some reason that I don't care about.

Clearly, you think all Asian women look alike.

Colleges want kids with unusual stories.

Come forward. We are ready for the next group.

Come here.

Come on, guys. I need this.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on. I mean I've known you since kindergarten.

Come on. I worked really hard

Come on. Just hold on to me. I got you.

Come on. Look, she's really upset.

Come on. People are still eating.

Come spread you dad's ashes with me at the beach."

Compared to the marble statue you're used to being with.

Confident her friends had believed this bullshit story.

Congratulations.

Cool.

Cool. And how about Trent?

Cool. I got fired from retail.

Cool. I heard you could get the things that didn't sell for free.

Cool. Well, if you change your mind or anything

Coolhindude.com

Could be reduced to a single sentence, but there it was.

Could you guys give me some privacy, please?

Couldn't finish it though.

Courtside seats.

Cousin Manju started her cardiology residency at 18.

Coyote girl Whoo!

Coyote girl!

Coyote girl! Whoo!

Coyote girl! Yeah!

Coyote Girl.

Crap! I'm supposed to be home by 11:00.

Cupcakes are here.

Currently, I'm looking for mustard.

Currently, she was on ironing duty.

Dad and Sharon try, but they don't really get me.

Dad, am I ugly?

Dad?

Dad?

Dad's not here. It's my call.

Dammit.

Dammit.

Dammit.

Dammit. My Raisinets.

Dammit. They already left for Malibu.

Damn, Mom! That was savage. Up top.

Damn.

Damn. That's a hard one to ignore.

Dang it. It's 10:45.

David, guess whose dad is taking them to the Clippers game tonight?

David! You came.

Deal with it.

Decorum. Equatorial Guinea, please use respectful language.

Deep breath.

Despite the fact that Bagel Bites, like, help us study!

Devi called. She wants to work with me at Old Navy.

Devi chose not to tell them she'd lied about Paxton deflowering her.

Devi couldn't help but feel proud.

Devi decided she had to move out of the house

Devi decided to search for answers on the internet.

Devi felt like her only move was to be completely invisible,

Devi got bit by a coyote, but she's in stable condition now.

Devi had reined in her brain and was being charming as hell.

Devi is no dork. She's a trailblazing Indian diva

Devi is not a fan.

Devi is not a headache.

Devi is out of control. She needs to be in an environment that values discipline.

Devi is playing the harp again?

Devi is, uh, actually taking a little break from the harp right now.

Devi knew how she could prove that she was a true friend of Eleanor's.

Devi promised she would do neither,

Devi said that I should come and speak to you in person.

Devi V and Paxton H Y are plundering each other's bods on the reg.

Devi V and Paxton H Y are plundering each others' bods on the reg.

Devi was distraught, but she had no one to blame but herself.

Devi was indulging in what I would call self destructive behavior.

Devi was relieved to hear someone praise Kamala's appearance

Devi was trapped at home with only her calculator as company.

Devi wasn't lost.

Devi, apologize to Ben right now!

Devi, come on. Get up. Prashant's gonna be here in an hour.

Devi, do not talk back to your uncle.

Devi, don't be rude to your beautiful cousin.

Devi, don't pry into your uncle's personal life.

Devi, don't say that to a stranger.

Devi, for once can you please try not to make my life any harder?

Devi, how was your first day at school?

Devi, I know you're upset.

Devi, if Paxton doesn't acknowledge you, I swear to you, I will wreck him.

Devi, is that any way to greet your mother and your neighbor?

Devi, listen.

Devi, look, can I be honest with you?

Devi, next to her. Devi, make sure you favor your left side.

Devi, please.

Devi, she's family. She's bettering her life.

Devi, that book was blessed by God!

Devi, that's not fair.

Devi, that's, that's unkind. I I wanted us to do this together.

Devi, the only person you're seeing is your therapist,

Devi, the reason I was enlisted by your doctors and your mother

Devi, there's a boy here to see you.

Devi, this is amazing.

Devi, we don't have an appointment.

Devi, we don't want to replace you with Jonah.

Devi, we're leaving.

Devi, what did you do?

Devi, what was that?

Devi, what's going on?

Devi, why are you screaming at your uncle?

Devi, why don't you play something on your harp?

Devi, you are so desperate to not feel sad,

Devi, you have some catching up to do.

Devi, you promised you'd be polite.

Devi, you're of age now.

Devi!

Devi! We've been trying to get in touch with you.

Devi?

Devi?

Devi. Thank you.

Devi...

Devi's legs stopped working.

Did Devi redecorate and become a super fan of the classic rock power group,

Did Eleanor send you here?

Did he care about her? Was he in love?

Did he give that to her?

Did I do okay?

Did I just talk you into breaking up with me?

Did I miss it? Am I too late?

Did I ruin it?

Did she say that?

Did someone say that I know about boyfriends?

Did that Alex Gomez boy get you pregnant?

Did they clean those vents over the summer?

Did they come for the wedding?

Did you ask out Alex Gomez?

Did you forget your calculator or something?

Did you get an A?

Did you get rid of Steve? How hard did he cry?

Did you guys hook up?

Did you hear? She got a part in the school play.

Did you see Devi's text?

Didn't you just do that?

Distinguished delegates and honorable chair,

Do both of her friends think

Do I have any other signatories?

Do I hear a second from my ally, Equatorial Guinea?

Do it. Stuff it! Stuff it! Stuff it!

Do not push me tonight, Mom,

Do people call it that?

Do they not know you switched to AP Latin?

Do they want me to go over there? You guys should come with me.

Do what in the morgue?

Do you believe in miracles?

Do you have a date?

Do you have a sibling, who could have a drug problem

Do you have any alcohol in here that I could take to the party?

Do you have to get your brow sculpted tonight?

Do you know he cried in my office today?

Do you know her?

Do you know if anyone like that is coming?

Do you know when you can't use your legs for no medical reason,

Do you like the Clippers?

Do you like your cake?

Do you mind going to the store and buying me a thong?

Do you think Billy Crystal will be there?

Do you think John McEnroe would let that umpire tell him

Do you want me to pop that for you?

Do you want to know what the Zestimate was?

Doctor Ryan, you know how much trouble I have taking the high road.

Doctor Ryan?

Does Devi have a boyfriend?

Does it get any more Southern California than this?

Does not make her any less human.

Does she think Devi's too unhinged to handle it?

Does this mean we can be friends again?

Doesn't make me think you're any less of a loser.

Doesn't mean I need to make her my girlfriend.

Don't be cheap, Ben.

Don't bother your cousin, sweetie. She doesn't need any extra pressure.

Don't drink that, by the way.

Don't drink too many sodas, or you'll be up all night.

Don't hate me. I got cheese fries and chili fries for the table.

Don't leave us music lovers waiting.

Don't let anything interfere with your selfish pleasure.

Don't look.

Don't take too long, and don't waste your time looking for your phone.

Don't think about us:

Don't throw your husband's ashes in the water!

Don't waste your prayers on stupid things like world peace.

Don't worry. He won't hurt me.

Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere.

Don't you dare apologize to me.

Don't you have a girlfriend?

Done with me.

Done? I love Jughead.

Dr. Ryan and her friends were so wrong.

Drama is no longer part of my life.

Dude, let me see.

During a lunch to decide this family's future.

Easy. Blood transfusion.

Egg salad? I've got extra spoons.

Eh. Who cares what other people think?

Either of you wanna sit courtside at the Clippers game tonight?

El and I agreed, we won't keep any more secrets from you,

Eleanor and I got stuck with this annoying kid, Ben,

Eleanor has a secret boyfriend

Eleanor, come on, that's a little dramatic.

Eleanor, come on. Please stop running away from me,

Eleanor, could you chill out on your spontaneous show tune singing?

Eleanor, right?

Eleanor, wait!

Eleanor, what are you wearing?

Eleanor, you are gonna date Boris Kozlov.

Eleanor.

Eleanor.

Eleanor's crazy mom almost blabbed that Fabiola was gay,

Eleanor's dad's dental practice.

Eleanor's freaking out. She quit the play.

Eleanor's mom is gone. She left this note.

Elise!

Enough! We talked about this yesterday.

Entertaining.

Equatorial Guinea does not support the American resolution.

Equatorial Guinea doesn't have nuclear capabilities.

Equatorial Guinea feels  that the United States' resolution

Equatorial Guinea would like to formally request permission

Equatorial Guinea, if you're done, you may yield back to the US.

Equatorial Guinea.

Ergo, no partying, no room service,

Eric was more compassionate to Eleanor's pain than you were.

Eric, enough. We're playing.

Eric, get out of here.

Especially losing your father.

Especially one with acting credentials.

Especially ones who are...

Ethically, legally, and most importantly, it's creepy.

Eve...

Even by people I thought were my friends.

Even if the harsh truth puts you in a wheelchair once again.

Even if you were from the wrong side of town,

Even in the lies you tell.

Even though it's a very cinematic way to emote.

Even though we haven't talked, we still care about you,

Even though you got divorced?

Even though your behavior has been outrageous

Even when Eleanor's mom abandons her,

Even when we're not on campus, we're still representatives of our school.

Every night at dinner, I have to hear about this rivalry of yours.

Every other Indian girl I've been set up with

Every teen in SoCal knows who Paxton is, brah.

Every year since the first grade.

Everybody, we have a very special guest for dinner tonight.

Everyone at my school hates me.

Everyone else's mom went hella homemade.

Everyone get up on stage. Let's pick up where we left off in scene seven.

Everyone pitied her.

Everyone thinks Shira and I are this perfect power couple

Ew, Mom. Don't say "of age."

Ew, you're bleeding.

Ew.

Ew. You have a zit.

Exactly.

Except for my dad's old law partner who poached Channing Tatum from him.

Except for sports,

Except for when that booze cruise came by.

Except lining the pockets of seawall corporations.

Except meat.

Except the bike is a man.

Except this beaker of potassium permanganate.

Excuse me for caring about this family's sugar intake!

Excuse me?

Excuse me. I don't mean to intrude, but, Mr. Gross sir,

Explaining to shareholders how Bunkr will link Londoners

Extremely.

Fab, tell her whenever you're ready.

Fab, what was that? That was so sexy.

Fab, what would you like?

Fab, what's wrong?

Fabiola and Eleanor were confident

Fabiola and I are gonna take a friend break from you.

Fabiola had told no one she was gay, except her robot, Gears Brosnan.

Fabiola was still struggling with how to tell her family.

Fabiola, no!

Fabiola, you are naturally snatched,

Fabiola, you get Alex Gomez.

Fair enough.

Fair enough.

Favorite nephew.

Field hockey is a beautiful sport.

Finally, some good news for this family.

Fine, but can I have five minutes of privacy with my friends please?

Fine.

Fine.

Fine. I'll just cut the cheeks out of my normal underwear. Whatever.

Fine. Then just do it in the morgue.

Fine. Why does the robot need a coffee?

Fine. You just lost yourself a dollar, bro.

First off, this is my house, so I can bring anyone I want...

First, she would start praying for the health of her mom and cousin,

Focus.

Foot fetish much?

For a boy you barely even know.

For a girl who always knew all the answers,

For a number of reasons.

For a queer youth center this weekend.

For date night?

For Devi, it's a logical response

For each of us to date.

For her fiance, Prashant, to fall in love with someone in his doctorate program

For lying about having sex with him,

For Malibu at 5:00 p.m.

For marriage.

For me, it's a reasonable reaction

For phone sex?

For real.

For sure the distressed ones. They look hot.

For sure, uh, but would you maybe wanna hang out after school or something?

For sure. One hundred percent.

For the crystal beaver in Kamala's room.

For the first time, she had something she wanted to write in her grief journal.

For The Glass Menagerie this week. She's such a pro.

For the good of the class?

For the length of a hallway.

For white people too.

For World History on the cuisines of South Asia.

For your dumb India move.

Forget about it. [chuckles]

Forget about the spiders and look at the house.

Forget it.

Forget it. I'm not going.

Freemasons, bench republicans,

Fresh off a successful wine heist

Friends?

From California.

From now on, name brand only.

From Toluca Lake, California.

Ganesh Puja is a Hindu holiday celebrating Lord Ganesh,

Genocide is not 100.

Get a load of sexy flapper girl.

Get her to spread her dad's ashes.

Get it in there. Yes!

Get out of there, Devi. This is a classic brush off.

Get out.

Get ready to get your online degree at StDoofusUniversity.com.

Get this out of my bake sale.

Get up.

Getting her doctorate at Caltech, soon to be engaged...

Girl, bye.

Give me your mechanical pencil.

Go ahead. I'll be right there.

Go get him, Devi.

Go learn something.

Go to the principal's office.

Go to your rooms right now!

God, Dad, you have great flexibility.

Goddamn it, Devi!

Going to fundraisers at restaurants owned by Lisa Vanderpump.

Good for you, Devi.

Good for you.

Good girl.

Good luck on your date.

Good morning, Devi.

Good morning, you young, brilliant minds.

Good night, Periyappa.

Good.

Goodbye, my love.

Goodbye, Steve.

Goodbye, Steve.

Gotcha. Will do.

Gotta run.

Great decision making.

Great note. I can do that.

Great. So you'll supervise Devi.

Great. Thank you for relieving the pressure, Auntie.

Great. There's a beautiful fountain I've had my eye on.

Greetings, musicians.

Grow fresh tomatoes for thakkali sambar,

Guess his last name makes more sense now.

Guess what, Belgium?

Guys, don't you want a better high school experience?

Guys, I am so sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me.

Guys, sophomore year is gonna be our year. I can feel it.

Guys...

Ha, ha!

Had a double arranged wedding with millionaire Hindu sisters.

Had dug up a memory she'd buried deep inside.

Had he said something weird while he was drunk on grigio?

Had Paxton said or done something to hurt Devi?

Had robbed them and tried to seduce Ben’s mother.

Half sari is more appropriate.

Happy birthday, Ben.

Happy birthday, my favorite son.

Hard to pin down.

Harp? I wanted a guitar.

Has he introduced you to his friends?

Has not been... useful to the learning environment of others.

Has tried to act like my mother.

Have fun at the movies.

Have one of the worst  human rights records in the world. Damn.

Have tika.

Have you been trying to tell me this for a while?

Have you considered falling apart might actually be the thing that...

Have you partnered with stupid people?

Have you seen Eleanor and Fabiola?

Have you seen the nurse's new haircut? I love it.

Have you spoken to Ron yet?

Have you told Paxton about Model UN?

Having just any boyfriend, no matter who he is,

He always bounced back stronger than before.

He can be dumb. I don't care.

He deserved it.

He doesn't let anyone push him around.

He doesn't want to just talk toons. Get out of there!

He gave her a baggy of gummy worms to cheer her up.

He gets out of gym, because he has a personal trainer.

He got into a car crash. He was dead a full 30 seconds.

He had a sexy name.

He had been a little bit, how do you say… distant?

He is my favorite player of all time.

He is nice, and smart, and he could never buy drugs

He knows his Indian women.

He looks amazing in fishnets.

He mother is such a flake. [laughs]

He runs the most exclusive college counseling company in LA.

He said "whip smart"?

He said god told him to go to Yale. It worked.

He said I'm just like any other Indian kid applying to college.

He said something mean to me.

He told me a bob haircut would allow me to play a child

He took off his shirt, and I freaked out.

He wanted to trademark the word "music."

He was a 50 year old insurance adjuster from Tarzana,

He was forced to retake this class, which he failed as a sophomore.

He was in my dad's garden,

He was just as lonely,

He was the villain here.

He wouldn't want you to sell it to a discount Luke Wilson.

He'd be like this big.

He'd be so sad if he knew we weren't speaking.

He'd gotten pit hair in fourth grade!

He's a 15 year old boy from Sherman Oaks, California,

He's a complete stranger.

He's a firecracker... just like you.

He's also here to be the male chaperone for Prashant's visit.

He's as much as my family as you are.

He's dead. It made me sad.

He's eating an onion.

He's got three fan Tumblrs.

He's just consistently bad at school.

He's just regular old Paxton to me.

He's my boyfriend.

He's not an idiot.

He's not molesting me. He's caressing me.

He's not my future husband yet. He's a potential future husband.

He's really wise.

He's sort of a big deal to Indians.

He's supposed to be goddamn Equatorial Guinea.

He's the community spiritual leader and also really knows how to work a room.

Hell yeah. Does your mom have any old dolls?

Hell, we're talking Trent Harrison.

Hello, Arlene, this is Nalini Vishwakumar.

Hello, Eleanor.

Hello, everybody.

Hello, Joyce.

Hello, ladies.

Hello, ladies.

Hello! Hi, girls.

Hello.

Hello.

Hello. I'm Eleanor Wong reading for Laura Wingfield.

Hello. My name is Eleanor.

Hello. You're beautiful. Are you new here?

Help me what?

Her Bollywood dance group was in the Macy's Day Parade

Her harmless piece of fiction would have never spread to the entire school.

Her ship just arrived in Cancún.

Her story starts when her parents, Nalini and Mohan,

Her two best friends took the situation in stride.

Here comes a little pinch.

Here you go, Gears.

Here, let me give you a tour.

Here's number one million and one of the things

Hey, are you Ron Hansen Bhattacharyya?

Hey, Ben, when you said, "I'll get you there,"

Hey, buddy, keep it moving.

Hey, can we make this quick? My frat has a rush event in 15.

Hey, can you help me with something?

Hey, Coyote Girl. Over here.

Hey, Eleanor, I heard that there were drinks by the pool.

Hey, Eve. I

Hey, Fab, you want to go to Yogurtland after school?

Hey, gods. It's Devi Vishwakumar,

Hey, guys. How's it going?

Hey, guys. You didn't do the thing.

Hey, I am not going to tell you I think you're sexy.

Hey, I can't believe I'm saying this, but...

Hey, I kinda like Model UN. Do you want to trade me for Chinese Club?

Hey, I know Jonah pays attention to you guys and smells really good,

Hey, I'm really sorry. I'm kinda drunk.

Hey, I'm trying to be vulnerable here. Also, we don't have butlers anymore.

Hey, is the bake sale over?

Hey, Jonah. You smell great today.

Hey, Kamala,

Hey, kids, move.

Hey, ladies. What's a poppin'?

Hey, let me help you. You come. Sit, sit.

Hey, man. It is so great to meet ya. [chuckles]

Hey, Mom. Sorry to interrupt,

Hey, move it along. We do not give grades for hallway loitering.

Hey, Paxton, can I talk to you?

Hey, Shirs. Excited for the game tonight?

Hey, stop pushing my leg.

Hey, sweetie. No time to talk.

Hey, Tiffany, you wanna go to Yogurtland after school?

Hey, um... I need a break from these aunties.

Hey, we already have one perfect daughter.

Hey, why did you have to use a spare key? Why didn't someone let you in?

Hey, you have guests.

Hey, you know what country's cool?

Hey, you're being really sketchy right now.

Hey, you're gonna wanna use baking soda on that.

Hey.

Hey.

Hey. I can actually come now. That scheduling conflict I had cleared up.

Hey. I haven't seen you all week.

Hey. I think we go to the same eye doctor.

Hey. Sorry I'm late.

Hi, Dr. Vishwakumar.

Hi, I'm Prashant.

Hi, Ms. Wong.

Hi, Paxton.

Hi, Paxton. You said you needed me.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi. Can I have two black coffees and one large hot chocolate?

Hi. Was I drooling?

Hi. We'd like two martinis, please.

Hi. Would either of you care to have your chai in the living room?

His ashes, I mean. Sorry. He's dead.

His new ally decided to go back to being his old nemesis.

His publicist doesn't accept baked goods. I've tried.

Hmm, intriguing.

Hmm? Why can't we just live in the moment?

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmph, for now, until you morph into your big fat dad.

Hollywood.

Holy shit! Paxton didn't tell anyone she lied!

Holy shit! There's a coyote on the lawn.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

Holy shit. Maybe she wasn't as friendzoned as she thought.

Honestly, I didn't really think I'd have to talk to you guys for this long.

Honestly, I'm surprised she hasn't had the police come over here

Honey, I can explain.

Honey.

Hope you enjoyed that because that was my final impression.

Hot dog.

Hot people don't have problems.

How about every single thing my mom has ever said and done?

How about that pretty dress I got at Costco

How am I unlikable? My dad drives a Porsche Cayenne.

How appropriate that Eve could be your first woman.

How are her vitals?

How are you even here? These people don't like you.

How are you handling your grief?

How are your legs? Can you feel this?

How brave you are to stand up to your parents.

How can we mend the conflict of our past when the conflict of our present rages on?

How come in all the movies about Hollywood

How come she hasn't come over in a while?

How could Eleanor have a boyfriend and not tell her about it?

How could she make things right with Paxton if he wouldn't talk to her?

How did Ben find out about her lie?

How do you find a safe place to hide so that you don't get exploded?

How do you know it was bad milk, Eric?

How do you know what's good?

How do you know who Paxton is?

How is it legal to drive 70 miles an hour around a thousand other cars?

How is the weather for you?

How is your grandma, Trent?

How is... the weather?

How long have you been in LA?

How long is Kamala gonna stay with us?

How many strings do you see here?

How old are you, Laura?

How thoughtful.

How wonderful! You're very talented, Devi.

How you would react with your legs and everything.

However you're feeling is right.

Huh? You understand?

Huh.

I actually am *******.

I actually don't see much of a beard.

I actually really wanted to come.

I actually think I am going to have a party tonight.

I agree. April Fools' is way scarier than Halloween.

I agree. In fact, I liked your idea even more than he did. [chuckles]

I also saw him fall off the roof a couple of mornings ago.

I always called him annoying.

I always hated it.

I am a robot.

I am going to prepare a cortisone shot for you.

I am honored to have powerful voices in my class,

I am not quite sure what to make of that, so I'm gonna ignore it.

I am processing.

I am so glad that you are done with that family.

I am so sorry for getting in the background of your amazing video.

I am so sorry.

I am taking my nurses to see the musical Waitress

I am.

I am.

I am. I know that.

I am...

I am...

I asked them to come and help you.

I asked you a question.

I barely did anything.

I beg your P?

I bet I can get you into any school you want.

I bet she doesn't let her textbooks fall on the floor.

I better go put on makeup.

I better not.

I can already tell you're not a virgin anymore.

I can bring a Ziploc bag with frozen g****s in it, huh?

I can explain.

I can.

I can't believe I said, "I wish you were dead." I didn't mean it.

I can't believe I trusted  Paxton's beautiful lying mouth over her.

I can't believe I'm a woman now.

I can't believe my own mother is so two faced!

I can't believe that a woman who was brave enough

I can't believe they have boyfriends and girlfriends already.

I can't believe you didn't tell me and Fabiola.

I can't believe you ditched us for him.

I can't believe you rented Chicago and let me sing the whole way through it.

I can't even think about that until I talk to my parents.

I can't go out with Alex Gomez. He's like a foot shorter than me.

I can't imagine what you must think of me.

I can't learn your lines for you.

I can't take it. I'm like a straight up indentured servant.

I can't think of a better word for "dorks."

I can't.

I cannot believe you because you keep lying to me.

I certainly am.

I could barely finish my second glass.

I could convince your mother to let you run the dishwasher once.

I could just hear the pity in her voice.

I could never be a model. I'm too curvaceous.

I could tell something bigger was bothering you.

I could've taken an Uber.

I couldn't get if I moved to India...

I dated Nathan Lane for three years.

I did an extra credit report

I did not eat them.

I didn't call you because I didn't want to see you.

I didn't know who you were a fan of these days,

I didn't push her. She fell.

I didn't really blow you guys off. I just had

I didn't ride the bus. I rollerbladed.

I didn't see him metaphorically with my heart or some shit.

I didn't want to upset you.

I didn't want you to see me as an out of work actor mom.

I didn't yell at you guys.

I do eat eggs.

I do have a life outside of being your therapist.

I do like to shake my fist.

I do not completely understand what happened today,

I do. Why don't you sit down?

I don't bring lunch on Tuesdays. It's square pizza day.

I don't care what they think.

I don't care what your job is.

I don't even care who he is, as long as he wanted to be with me.

I don't hate you.

I don't have a crush on Ben.

I don't have an Aladdin,

I don't have the time to go to Rancho Cucamonga today.

I don't know about you,

I don't know how much you've heard, but she ran away from home.

I don't know if I can fall asleep in a house

I don't know if I'd call it that, but yeah, it's gonna be fire.

I don't know what to say.

I don't know what you mean by "Devi nonsense."

I don't know who else to ask.

I don't know, Becca. She's kinda pulling it off.

I don't know, but I'm certainly not trying to go to bed with my mother every night.

I don't know, Kamala.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know. Can I have them?

I don't know. I, like, have a lot going on with swimming and stuff.

I don't know. I'm already,  technically, grounded for drinking.

I don't know. Maybe you running your mouth about me sleeping with Paxton.

I don't know. Maybe.

I don't know. Some things about me may be embarrassing to you.

I don't know. They were sort of... a lot.

I don't know. What's her name?

I don't know... hot?

I don't need some washed up white dude, who leases a Tesla

I don't need to marry her.

I don't negotiate with terrorists, Ben.

I don't really feel at home right now in my choice of clothing.

I don't see how. You ate five samosas.

I don't think I have access to the supply closet.

I don't think the part of Laura is big enough for you.

I don't think this is gonna work. All right, you should probably just go.

I don't think we can.

I don't treat you guys like crap.

I don't understand the correlation.

I don't understand why America has a national holiday to celebrate them.

I don't want anyone diluting the quality of my project.

I don't want that.

I don't want to feel better.

I don't want to fight with you.

I don't want to hear another weak excuse about why you're acting crazy.

I don't want to make this weird,

I don't want to marry you.

I don't want us to fight anymore.

I don't. It's for white people.

I don't... I don't know what I was thinking.

I dropped my phone in the toilet.

I ended up coming out to her anyway.

I even told her I would Botox her armpits for free.

I expect you to all act in a way that is respectful to your school...

I feel bad for her.

I feel like I just solved an escape room I've been trapped in my entire life.

I feel you.

I feel you. World domination.

I find it a little hard to believe

I followed through on your boyfriends plans,

I found a Bollywood movie about a princess who falls for a lowly street sweeper.

I found a vision board she made for my life.

I found the car very comfortable.

I gave you strict instructions to buy a moderately priced sedan.

I get it if you want to replace me with Jonah.

I got a shitload of Uncrustables in the freezer.

I got all the classes I wanted.

I got to know all about their high school love lives.

I gotta be honest, this setup feels sort of sketchy to me,

I gotta call them.

I gotta go.

I guess a chicken?

I guess I technically have a boyfriend named Alex Gomez.

I guess I was wrong when I said no one would date anyone in the UN.

I guess I've always been a little too protective.

I guess she's going on the Model UN trip.

I guess sometimes I feel like I'm an NBA player, but...

I guess that could be cool.

I guess the lie sounded better than my real life.

I guess this one's probably just an ingrown hair from my beard.

I guess we'll have to see.

I guess we'll just move onto step two, and get boyfriends.

I had the bike blessed at the temple.

I had this kid.

I hate neutral tones. I miss my scarves and capes.

I hate pranks.

I hate that I missed out on this moment.

I hate you!

I hate you!

I hate you!

I have a better chance of being hit by a meteor.

I have a boyfriend. His name is Oliver, and he's on the tech crew.

I have a choice...

I have a Skype call with my partner, Debra.

I have an extra ticket.

I have chosen attainable, yet status enhancing people

I have decided to move my daughter and I back to India,

I have excellent gaydar.

I have let you down, Auntie.

I have made your favorite:

I have orchestra after school today, so I can't.

I have the bigger shit!

I have the bigger shit!

I have to take it back to the priest.

I haven't told my family yet.

I heard from half a dozen aunties that you yelled at college counselor Ron,

I heard he works at Sephora and loves giving makeovers.

I heard Roopa got fat.

I heard that if a zit gets too big,

I heard we had an uninvited guest on your chin.

I heard what you said the night Dad died.

I heard you yell.

I honestly would've deserved it.

I hope that you won't look at me any differently.

I hope you had fun,

I hope your summer didn't go by too allegro.

I joked about getting a Mr. Meeseeks for the office,

I just don't want Prashant to tell his family that we're weird.

I just don't want to take a photo.

I just feel like I'm really struggling to raise you.

I just googled the price. Wow, that's valuable.

I just haven't had the time.

I just let everyone believe that I did.

I just need to tune this thing.

I just stole some from the fridge.

I just think it's super unfair of them to stop speaking to me.

I just think maybe you need to give her a chance to prove you wrong.

I just think you might need to do a little bit more

I just think you're pretentious and unlikable.

I just thought, "Am I gonna be this insecure Indian guy,

I just want him to be a stone cold hottie, who could rock me all night long.

I just want to remind you,

I just want you in my life.

I just want you to be happy.

I just wanted one night where I wasn't sucked into your drama,

I just wanted to book something else before I tried to see you again.

I just wanted to say how interested I would be in procuring your services.

I just wanted to say that I'm so sorry for everything that happened.

I just watched 16 hours of Riverdale.

I just wish Devi were here right now.

I just... I didn't want to upstage you

I just... I haven't eaten dinner with anyone in a long time.

I kinda like you too.

I kinda like you.

I kissed one boy one time.

I knew it was you.

I knew we shouldn't have bought generic numbing cream.

I know Devi is deflecting, but she has a point, El.

I know exactly how you feel.

I know exactly where I am.

I know how hard it is to memorize seven facts.

I know I am.

I know I don't deserve another chance,

I know I'm just a burden to you.

I know it's a little weird for me to be saying that,

I know it's an Indian thing,

I know that I was weird to you before,

I know that I'm not as good as Mohan,

I know that you'll want to work until you have children.

I know there are some real hunks on the Caltech campus.

I know this sounds crazy, but would you want to get dinner?

I know you don't want to be like your mom,

I know you just had another man climbing on you roof,

I know you think that it was your father who was the only one who cared about you,

I know you're here. Your car is outside.

I know you're mad at me,

I know your secret.

I know, and I am really sorry, but Paxton had an emergency too.

I know, Aravind. You try and sell me a security system every visit.

I know, but I did mean what I said. I really do miss you guys.

I know, but I need your help.

I know, but now it seems like a good option for me.

I know, but right now, she's organizing the PTA bake sale,

I know, right?

I know!

I know! He really lets me shine...

I know. I got your Excel spreadsheet.

I know. I know I messed up.

I know. I think about you, too.

I know. I wish she were here to help me with my audition

I know. It'll be so special.

I know. It's gonna be a really touching story to tell my children.

I know. It's weird for me too.

I know. They've grown up so fast.

I learned that the tangent of theta

I legit got mauled.

I lied to everyone, okay?

I like the incense you used.

I like to put just one chili. Otherwise, it kind of overpowers the taste.

I like your denim overalls.

I look more comfortable being Indian.

I love being Indian. [scoffs]

I love everything about you.

I love that little guy. He's so important to me.

I love this for you.

I love you too, Mom. I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

I made you a lunch.

I mean Hindus.

I mean look at me.

I mean the clothes.

I mean you're popular, right?

I mean, a man or woman down before.

I mean, ally.

I mean, as a first timer, I don't think anyone's ever made such a big impact.

I mean, can you imagine the shock waves it would send through drama club?

I mean, clearly, there are some exceptions.

I mean, do you really think you'd make a good girlfriend right now?

I mean, honestly, I got into a huge fight with her after that.

I mean, I came out by getting stoned and tweeting "me gay now."

I mean, I didn't think you were someone who believed in therapy.

I mean, I guess I could go all the way up to my room on the fifth floor,

I mean, I'll look too good.

I mean, I'm like the only Indian child ever to run away from home

I mean, I've seen the people in your waiting room.

I mean, it might help her to know that you're also struggling.

I mean, it's a fashion emergency.

I mean, last year was a freshmen shit fest.

I mean, look at you. You have the beauty of Priyanka Chopra,

I mean, she's tried out for almost every role on TV.

I mean, thanks to you, I'm basically Sex and the City.

I mean, usually I don't, but especially today.

I mean, we got close to hooking up.

I mean, who was he to judge this guy?

I meant to ask you. Later today,

I miss you so much.

I missed it too. I was talking to you guys.

I motion we toast the United States and Equatorial Guinea.

I must say your house is very easy to break into.

I need Devi here to weed the garden.

I need every loser I can get to make me look smarter by comparison.

I need more photos of me looking smart.

I need to give Broadway one more shot.

I never even got to go to Coachella, Ben.

I never had sex with Paxton.

I never had sex with Paxton.

I never intentionally told people that we were hooking up.

I officially call this session of the Security Council to order.

I overheard you and Ben talking on the bus.

I prayed for her every day.

I prefer a round square, and maybe a tasteful ombre in neutral pinks.

I promise I will call you after lunch is over.

I promise to be on my best behavior.

I promise you don't have anything to worry about.

I promise. I'll make sure I'm home before my mom.

I promised I wouldn't say anything that I was told at the gab sesh.

I put all of my awards in an underground bunker

I ran the numbers with Fabiola.

I read on Wikipedia

I read Vietnam vets their Bill O'Reilly books.

I really enjoyed programming your family's universal remote.

I really enjoyed puja today.

I really only thought I'd be buying two Frappuccinos

I really think you should talk to her and clear this up.

I received some very exciting information today.

I reported her, and she's been punished accordingly.

I returned home last night to find you screaming in your uncle's face.

I said I wished the Nazis would kill Ben.

I said it was good to have him in our home.

I said, "No matter why you have chosen to curse them,

I saw a couple riding a tandem bike.

I saw a girl who had ice cream cones with sassy faces.

I saw her drop you off yesterday.

I saw someone eating pasta out of a bucket.

I should get going, too.

I should punch you in the Adam's apple for saying that.

I shouldn't be so dramatic.

I sit behind you in history class.

I spent all my science fair winnings on it.

I spread my mother's in the fountain at the Bellagio.

I stopped listening after you said you wanted to be with me.

I switched with Lisa.

I think I drank some bad milk.

I think I know what I need to do.

I think I love you.

I think it might be faster if I just take a Lyft.

I think it would be better for us.

I think it's okay.

I think it's time for us to scatter his ashes.

I think it's time you kids head home.

I think it's too hard for us to be just friends.

I think Mohan would've enjoyed that as well.

I think my type is kinda that girl, Eve, in our history class.

I think she's onto something, and I'd like to make her my friend.

I think they feel guilty about ditching me on my birthday.

I think we can all agree that last year sucked

I think you give many F's.

I think you guys are gonna have a really nice time.

I think you have to be our Amanda.

I think you need to find another woman to get yogurt with.

I think you should talk to you mom and find out why she's here.

I think you're super cool and whip smart.

I think your father would've enjoyed that little ceremony.

I think your mom was our server at Casa Mexico last night.

I thought about giving Broadway another try,

I thought he was the landscaper.

I thought I came to America for the great education,

I thought I'd be that way too,

I thought maybe I could help.

I thought maybe this would be that bridge.

I thought no one would bang me. How could I have AIDS?

I thought that would be loud for longer.

I thought there was like a roach on your face, man.

I thought we all agreed we are gonna be off book today,

I thought we said no Devi nonsense.

I thought we were friends, but you were just using me.

I thought you might like some loaded baked potato tots, hold the bacon.

I thought you might need some things from home.

I thought you told me you kissed.

I thought you were an adult.

I told her we were moving us back to India,

I told you it would all make sense.

I told Zoe I'd go with her to a brow sculpting pop up.

I took three semesters in stage combat.

I totally get it. Have a good day.

I understand you're struggling to raise me.

I understand. I'm so sorry.

I used to sit by her bed every night with a Nerf gun.

I volunteered you to go next door to help old Mrs. Finch cut her toenails.

I want a chance to make my offer.

I want people to take me seriously.

I want the best for you.

I want to be fresh to meet Kamala's future husband tomorrow,

I want to get drunk with you guys.

I want to get to know you better."

I want to make sure someone grabs the good alcohol.

I want to show you something.

I want you to allow yourself

I want you to feel shooketh.

I want you to talk to him.

I wanted to explain everything to her, but then she ran out the door.

I wanted to say I'm sorry for yesterday.

I wanted you to see me as a forensic scientist on Bosch.

I was about to ask for good grades.

I was also paralyzed last year?

I was dumped in Jamaica with nothing but my suitcase

I was fired from the cruise.

I was going to, but I didn't know how big Prashant was,

I was hoping I'd see someone cool here.

I was just minding my own business,

I was just trying to be a normal teenager.

I was lying.

I was pretending to be someone I'm not, which I should only be doing on stage.

I was seeing someone,

I was so excited that I got to hang out with them yesterday.

I was so lonely, I got catfished by a middle aged man yesterday.

I was so proud when I thought of that idea in this moment.

I was such a shitty daughter, and I said I wouldn't come.

I was with you up until that last part.

I was wondering if you could help me become emancipated from my mother.

I wasn't doing anything.

I watch mad cartoons. Just like you.

I will not be buying you a tacky ass thong.

I will not calm down when this child insists on being such a headache to me!

I will not come down when this child insists on being such a headache to me!

I will place my body in front of t shirt cannon

I will tell you that kid sucks, and you should ignore him.

I wish he brought tacos.

I wish I had a less ninth grade book analogy for it,

I wish I was the dead body on the 101.

I wish you were the one that died that night.

I wish you were the one that died that night.

I wish your metaphor had been something more in my wheelhouse,

I would too.

I would, but, um... sadly, he passed away eight months ago.

I wouldn't normally bring him into the house while anyone was awake,

I wouldn't wanna pee in the middle of doing it.

I yield to the chair.

I Zillow ed his house.

I...

I'd actually like to hear more of Equatorial Guinea's plan.

I'd argue it's too under control.

I'd be a bad therapist if I didn't.

I'd be scared to lose two more people that were that close to me.

I'd like that too.

I'd like to lead a joint initiative...

I'd like to welcome back Devi V, our star harpist.

I'd prefer if he were not.

I'd prefer not to have any visitors right now.

I'd really, really like a boyfriend,

I'll be honest. It was mixed.

I'll be there in, like, ten minutes.

I'll be there.

I'll find you later.

I'll get 2 on the phone and tell him I'm not coming.

I'll get you there.

I'll go check.

I'll go find your doctor now.

I'll let you have my e mail address.

I'll make it up to you guys. Did you hear about Ben's party?

I'll probably just get a real model.

I'll see you Monday, Devi.

I'll take you to Malibu.

I'll take you. I've only had Red Bull,

I'll think about it.

I'll try to be more observant in the future.

I'm a baby Buttigieg.

I'm a big virgin fraud.

I'm a dermatologist. Half my patients are acne faced teenagers,

I'm a goddamn delight.

I'm a little shocked.

I'm a rude teenager, who disrespects her mother.

I'm a sophomore.

I'm a student at this high school, actually.

I'm a teenager.

I'm about to run again.

I'm almost 16. I could drive it.

I'm an actor. I have to be where the jobs are.

I'm Andy Samberg.

I'm assuming the date didn't go well?

I'm Devi. It's nice to meet you.

I'm different since I quit the play.

I'm doing exactly what I said I'd do.

I'm down, but I can't tonight.

I'm Eric, a very popular and handsome jock.

I'm fine. I think I'm having low blood sugar.

I'm fine. You know, my life is totally awesome.

I'm gay.

I'm going to a self actualization retreat in Santa Barbara.

I'm going to the movies with my friends.

I'm gonna ask Jonah to come over and watch unreleased Ariana Grande footage.

I'm gonna barf in my tuba. [retches]

I'm gonna be an atheist, who eats cheeseburgers every day

I'm gonna check on Oliver.

I'm gonna get a drink.

I'm gonna go find Ron.

I'm gonna go see what's taking Kamala so long.

I'm gonna grab her lavender oils, and I'll meet you in the drama room.

I'm gonna have to blackmail you.

I'm good to go to the garage.

I'm happy for you and Oliver.

I'm here because... um...

I'm here to have sex with you.

I'm here to talk about my daughter who wishes I were dead.

I'm in a six year research program

I'm in a very specific window right now.

I'm in all AP classes and got a perfect score on my PSAT.

I'm in it.

I'm into you.

I'm just a messed up person who ruins everything

I'm just concerned it's a little simple.

I'm just finishing up a run.

I'm just glad Jonah was there.

I'm just gonna go get a drink.

I'm just gonna go to this party tonight and hang out with my cooler friends,

I'm just gonna steal Devi for a second.

I'm just happy to see you and Eleanor together again.

I'm just kind of protective of my sister.

I'm just really scared to tell my family I'm gay.

I'm living with four 19 year olds,

I'm no longer a creative person,

I'm not Damn!

I'm not gonna do it in the morgue.

I'm not gonna do them. I'd just like the opportunity to say:

I'm not gonna throw my life away for you.

I'm not here to be friends. I want to be with you...

I'm not like any other Indian kid,

I'm not Marie Kondo ing members of this family

I'm not ready.

I'm not sure she wants me back.

I'm not sure. I want to say...

I'm not that beautiful.

I'm not used to popping off.

I'm on it.

I'm part Japanese.

I'm Paxton's sister.

I'm paying through my nose for ultra fast internet.

I'm popping off.

I'm ready to bone.

I'm really looking forward to it. Yeah.

I'm really worried about Devi.

I'm Rebecca.

I'm rescuing my love from sexual slavery.

I'm returning it to the store as soon as Prashant leaves.

I'm right next to you, pal.

I'm so ashamed.

I'm so happy for you!

I'm so proud of you.

I'm so sorry about your polio, Doctor Vishwakumar.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I'm so sorry it's such an inconvenience for you that my dad died.

I'm so sorry, Kamala. I tried to stop her,

I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for everything.

I'm so sorry. That was such a weird thing to say.

I'm sorry I called you hot.

I'm sorry I didn't realize you were Asian, bro.

I'm sorry if I frightened you,

I'm sorry if I was being rude.

I'm sorry if I've hurt you.

I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner. I, honestly, just realized

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I just didn't know

I'm sorry. I'm just messed up.

I'm sorry. I'm just under a lot of stress right now.

I'm sorry. I've been going through a lot.

I'm sorry. I've been told before

I'm sorry. We were waiting for her?

I'm sort of a low key man of mystery.

I'm still the same Fabiola.

I'm super bummed.

I'm supposed to go cheer on my girlfriend's field hockey practice.

I'm sure he's really interested in international diplomacy.

I'm sure if you came home,

I'm sure she has an explanation.

I'm sure whatever your Uncle Aravind is saying is really interesting.

I'm trying to scream, but they can't hear me.

I'm used to it.

I'm very excited for taco night.

I'm...

I've basically been talking to Paxton all night.

I've been a really shitty friend,

I've been dying for you to have a boyfriend.

I've been going to prom since seventh grade.

I've been here for two months.

I've been such a mess about our breakup.

I've been traveling for years doing musical theater,

I've decided, we're keeping the moped.

I've just really missed you.

I've kinda been a dick to you lately, so...

I've missed Eleanor terribly...

I've missed you too,

I've only come out to these guys and my robot.

I've selected a killer outfit for my video call with Prashant's family.

I've spent all morning kissing up to Sanchiti.

I've watched Big Bang Theory.

I’m a tennis commentator, not a golf commentator.

I’m calling for sponsors in support of my proposal

If Ben hadn't opened his big fat stupid mouth,

If everyone Trent knew was invited,

If I can't go to the nurse's office. Please!

If I didn't teach you to follow your dreams?

If I don't go, he might hurt himself.

If I get caught again, I'm in deep shit.

If I had your body, I'd treat it right too.

If I'd known I'd get to use a bathroom with a TV in it.

If I'm being really honest, this isn't the life I imagined for you.

If I'm not winning the Best Delegate gavel?

If not, I will build you legs.

If one is available.

If she could live with him.

If she wants to get me to talk to her.

If that were me,

If they can do it, we can learn how to do it too.

If we don't act now, the oceans will rise so much

If we get enough samples, we can squeeze them into a big cup.

If we get enough samples, we can squeeze them into a big cup.

If we swiped a couple of bottles, no one would even notice.

If we're cool now, should we meet up in your garage tomorrow?

If we're cool, should we meet in your garage tomorrow?

If we're gonna be out of town, you should throw yourself a party.

If women didn't accept each other's apologies,

If you change your mind, Kamala and I are leaving the house

If you don't mind taking over my dermatology practice.

If you ever use the B word with me again,

If you need to talk to us that urgently, you can also afford to hydrate our lovers.

If you want to come through.

If you want to go to Princeton, you know what you need to do.

If you want to stay on the family cell phone plan,

If you were ready to bone,

If you'd like to go to Eleanor's or Fabiola's house

If you're late, I can't protect you from "you know who."

If your prom date cancels on you, you know where to find me.

Imagine being in France in the middle of the blitzkeg.

Imagine how powerful they'd be.

Imagine you're waking up to a normal day in Hiroshima,

In a group of 500 Indian people?

In a nice house like this.

In a supportive way.

In fact, I talked to my dad the other night.

In fact, I think she should check out where I put it.

In fact, no one seemed to know.

In fact, we think that the resolution is a piece of shit.

In here.

In my day, if you liked someone, you pointed to them in the stands,

In one bite, in one bite... Prove it!

In person.

In protest, I shan't use my legs either.

In ripped jeans and a "Fries Before Guys" t shirt.

In that they did none of it.

In the movies, you always see the girl kiss her way down a guy's body,

In the San Fernando Valley.

In the vending machine trying to steal chips.

In your current mental state,

India is not that different from Coachella.

Instead, I would like to put forth an alternative plan.

Is a great idea that you fully support?

Is a poorly considered half measure at best.

Is Devi home?

Is equal to the sine of theta divided by the cosine of theta. Happy?

Is he just using you as a sexy sidepiece and ignoring you in public?

Is his penis as big as it looks in those gray sweatpants?

Is it because I coach a really bad track team?

Is it Frank with the receding hairline? I knew it.

Is it Ramadan?

Is it real?

Is it your birthday? Why didn't you say something?

Is never ever coming back?

Is not gonna make you happier or change who you are.

Is she stopping at the penis, or kissing all the way to the foot?

Is she?

Is that a skirt or a headband?

Is that because you do not wish to have any children?

Is that I lost the only parent that actually cared about me.

Is that most home burglaries happen during the daytime.

Is that okay?

Is that why, Mister Feminist?

Is the lady who watered her lawn during the drought.

Is this kid on HGH?

Is this yours?

Is to delve into some of the major events

Is your rant over, or can I go to Trent's?

Isn't that a good thing?

Isn't that cool?

Isn't that fantastic?

Isn't this great, guys?

It can, like, leak into your brain and kill you.

It doesn't have to be a date. It can just be

It doesn't matter how it makes me feel.

It feels totally different.

It flew away.

It includes a Tuscan wedding to Michael B. Jordan.

It is the literal fruit of our patience and hard work.

It is, but this is just the wedding dance.

It just got weird, you know?

It just got weird, you know?

It looks like you're just reading an Indian hair magazine.

It looks so good.

It made me think of how you don't know how to ride a bike.

It makes me sound like a girl in a douche commercial.

It makes you more interesting.

It matters how it makes me look.

It may be hard to understand why we hotheads fly off the handle.

It must've been tight to sit courtside.

It really fits my brand as a theater wench.

It seemed like Devi had just bailed on her best friends to help a boy...

It seemed like you packed in haste.

It seems I was mistaken.

It should be cool, if you're interested.

It smells like there is actual shit in this room.

It sounded like a one way ticket to freedom USA.

It turns out we're a pretty good team for two people who hate each other.

It usually goes pretty well for them. You're looking to get into meth, right?

It was awesome.

It was beautiful...

It was his fault Paxton was mad at her.

It was impossible not to notice everybody staring at her.

It was just him!

It was like we were in a cannabis store.

It was my college mascot too, at MIT.

It was really cool of you to do so much of the work.

It was so easy to get distracted.

It was so great to see you out of the house

It was so nice not to be in a wheelchair,

It was so offensive!

It was stage one. They caught it early,

It was still a family dinner.

It was that she let herself believe she actually had a shot with him.

It was very tiring.

It was where all the best looking guys in school ate lunch.

It was widely known to have been created by Ben.

It wasn't a big deal. I was... kinda feeling bummed.

It would be my pleasure.

It'd be cruel to take that away.

It'd just be nice to talk to someone who gets me,

It'll be good for my Insta.

It'll collect on your mustache.

It'll make you feel better.

It's 90210, baby.

It's a bit hard to do, sweetie.

It's a gavel.

It's a grief journal.

It's a sign. It is a beautiful day!

It's a weird Indian thing.

It's actually the only present I got other than a postcard from my dentist.

It's adorable.

It's all good. I forgive you.

It's all right. You're a weird girl.

It's also body shaming when people say curvy is beautiful.

It's an app that tells a stranger the exact location of a ******* person

It's bad enough I have see him every day at school.

It's called psychosomatic?

It's chill. I'll see you tomorrow.

It's clean now. It dried fast.

It's complicated,

It's cool?

It's cool.

It's crazy how well the sound carries.

It's crowded, dusty. Diplo's sort of around.

It's currently sitting in the back of Paxton's Jeep, soaked in pool water.

It's fine.

It's fine. I caught it.

It's fine. I don't really care what your mom thinks.

It's fine. Take your time.

It's friggin' luxurious.

It's gonna be sick. My parents are out of town.

It's good if you wanna repeat the class a third time.

It's great training for looking cute while drinking something gross.

It's happened before.

It's hard to see him through the eyes of a fan,

It's his birthday. I want to take him somewhere he loves.

It's just a catchphrase of one of her favorite characters on American TV.

It's just I had sort of an important realization recently, and

It's just, like, we were expecting an uggo.

It's like he's smuggling a pepper grinder in there.

It's like riding a bike...

It's like, I think about sex 24/7, but I don't really know how to do it.

It's me, TheRealPickleRick69... from Reddit...

It's medication for my mom's... polio.

It's messed up, Devi.

It's more of a line and a dot if you're really going to graph it.

It's not a big deal, Ben.

It's not a big deal.

It's not a triangle.

It's not as much fun watching 90 Day Fiancé

It's not embarrassing for me. I always come out of it looking cool.

It's not fun, Ben, it's work...

It's not like they're gonna talk to the Hot Pocket,

It's not like you have a huge lie threatening to tear everyone apart.

It's not likely.

It's not me who needs you. It's my sister.

It's not my fault.

It's not my wedding day. It's just lunch.

It's not out of control.

It's not weird unless you make it weird.

It's not. I'm miserable.

It's okay if I film it, right?

It's okay if it's a sad one or a neutral one.

It's okay, Devi.

It's okay, Patty.

It's okay.

It's okay. Happens to me a lot.

It's okay. I understand.

It's only seven hours long.

It's Prashant. I will open the door.

It's pretty obvious you two are over.

It's so good to see you, and Devi,

It's so low rent.

It's so nice to meet you. My name is Devi Vishwakumar.

It's the first day of school, and I thought we should have a check in.

It's the mascot of Caltech.

It's the playground of the rich and famous.

It's the Romani people, Mr. Shapiro.

It's true.

It's true. I was dumped.

It's very well hidden.

Itchiness of saris is a rite of passage for Indian women.

Jackpot. [chuckles]

Jewber's a good idea. You guys are crazy.

******* people know how to save.

Jolly Roger?

Jonah is on stage at Rocky Horror.

Jonah Sharpe.

Jonah, this is an A, B, C conversation, so can you get your D out of here?

Jonah? Since when are you guys friends?

Jonah's been a really good friend to us,

Joyce had offered to take the girls to a carnival,

Just an unfriendly reminder that you're not necessarily good at UN

Just ask her anyway.

Just because Devi is confined to a wheelchair,

Just because you are a UN.

Just broke into our house, and you don't even care.

Just forget I did that.

Just gonna rub a little coconut oil in her hair so she smells like his mother.

Just have a day.

Just keep your nose out of my business

Just kidding. [chuckles] We'll do something easier.

Just leave me alone!

Just let Devi write it. She's the smart one in the group.

Just let me get dressed.

Just like a simple red lace thong

Just like I did for the US Open Final in '84 when I won in straight sets.

Just like me.

Just like that, she could walk again.

Just so you know, I have to shave my chest for swimming,

Just take your slime and go.

Just the original Fab Three.

Just to make the place seem homier.

Just... Ganesh Puja.

Kamala does nothing and gets a full husband in the mail.

Kamala should be alone with the crystal beaver

Kamala was asleep. I could hear her beautiful snoring from upstairs,

Kamala, batteries!

Kamala, both your sides are equally good.

Kamala, his family wants to see

Kamala, please lower the spice level accordingly.

Kamala, tell them about some of your favorite recipes.

Kamala, the lemonade is a bit too sour.

Kamala, this lemonade is too sour.

Kamala, what is your boyfriend doing here when your future husband is here?

Kamala, where are the batteries?

Kamala, your parents have found you a match...

Kamala!

Kamala? What are you doing here?

Kamala.

Kamala's future husband is visiting tomorrow,

Kanna, did you have a good trip?

Kanna, look what I got you. It's a harp.

Kanna, please go upstairs and check again.

Kanna, what is it?

Kanna, why don't you just help me clear the table?

Kanna, you do not say such things to your mother.

Keep your mouth shut, Devi.

Kinda thought this would be more of a collab, but okay.

Kinda, but I didn't know how.

Kristen Stewart in Twilight or Kristen Stewart in Charlie's Angels?

LA's responsible sister.

Last night, I drank Sauvignon Blanc, and a boy touched my shoulder.

Last night, I saw you eat a plain yogurt

Last week, Mrs. Iyengar asked if we were going to show up at puja,

Later, man.

Later.

Leasing is still a financial commitment!

Less of an ego battle that way.

Let me be your harbor master.

Let me give you guys a sec to decide,

Let me know if she stops walking again,

Let me look into it, and, uh, I'll see what I can do.

Let me make it up to you.

Let me start by saying I don't have a ring.

Let's check in with the Vishwakumars.

Let's go inside.

Let's go make out in your parents' room. Come on.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's see.

Let's take a pic. Let them know you're good.

Let's talk over here.

Like a guy from a sports team.

Like Bella Hadid is for Dior?

Like catalog? Sure.

Like celebrity gossip or YouTube promposals,

Like I did at the trophy ceremony

Like I said, it's a single ticket.

Like I said...

Like Paxton and Trent.

Like the picture of Jesus’s mother in the museum.

Like what?

Like, "Live más."

Like, he chooses you for a group project, and he gives you a nickname.

Like, I could name every class you've had for the last two years.

Like, the other day,

Like, two months ago.

Like, uh... slavery,

Like, when my parents first adopted her,

Like, when you said your ideal man was James Corden in Cats.

Listen, I don't wanna sound conceited,

Listen, I just want you both to know that I've really learned my lesson

Listen, I know I've been a bad friend,

Listen, I need to get to class.

Listen, I think I've got something that could really help you.

Listen, I'm sorry, Ben,

Listen, sweetie, I'm so, so sorry.

Loaded baked potato tots, hold the bacon?

Look at him, giving it back to that umpire.

Look, forget about Paxton.

Look, I can go. It seems like a bad time.

Look, I feel like a stranger here, and I don't have a support system,

Look, I get it. I'm a 50 year old insurance adjuster from Tarzana.

Look, I know I used to clown on this every year,

Look, I'll know it'll be a big change, but I think we need it.

Look, I'm gonna go do the project on my own, like I wanted to before.

Look, if anyone here is dreaming, it's me.

Look, maybe you should just apologize.

Look, no one is forcing you to do anything.

Look, Prashant, I am so sorry this happened,

Look, this is really nice, but...

Look. I brought tacos.

Looking forward to it.

Looks like Monday and Tuesday, clear skies.

Looks like you could use a seat buddy.

Lord Ganesh doesn't need to see my daughter

Losing your virginity to someone you barely know

Love lives? No, no, no.

Love you too.

Love, Mom.

LSD? CBD? MDMA?

Luckily for her, Jonah was struggling with the same thing.

Made a beeline to get away from me.

Make my patients feel a little more comfortable.

Make sure everything flows well together.

Make sure you drink a lot of water today, okay?

Makes me sound more mysterious.

Makes sense. He's trying to get on my good side,

Man, David, watching you flirt with Jonah

Man, this is boring.

May I, Mr. Shapiro?

Maybe I could get more punch and then just turn it into a pink suit?

Maybe I should go over to Eleanor's for a study session.

Maybe if America had more air traffic controllers,

Maybe if it were a Lakers game,

Maybe if we'd all hung out before. Worked up to the game.

Maybe it is, but I can't betray my family.

Maybe it will teach you not to be so thoughtless!

Maybe it's my perfect grades or my killer test scores.

Maybe losing us will make you appreciate our friendship a little bit more.

Maybe Princeton will allow you to raise a little baby in your dorm room.

Maybe she's a spy or in a really good cult.

Maybe she's all better now.

Maybe the five permanent members of the Security Council

Maybe they'll get over it.

Maybe this year was looking up after all.

Maybe we could add a person hiding inside the B.

Maybe we could hang out sometime?

Maybe we should wait until Kamala and Nalini come back.

Maybe you can play Laura Linney reading an audiobook for her.

Maybe you should shut up.

Maybe you shouldn't be so focused on having a boyfriend.

Maybe you would benefit from a different approach.

McEnroe, back to you.

Me? Upset?

Me. Fab, pay attention.

Me. I don't want to.

Meant dressing like a celebrity leaving LAX.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to trick a gay guy into going to Johnny Rockets with me.

Meanwhile, the guy Kamala's having sex with

Missionary.

Mm hmm.

Mm hmm.

Mm, yeah. I got a really good idea.

Mm.

Mm.

Mmm, Devi, sounds like you are quite the little diplomat.

Mmm!

Mmm.

Mmm.

Model UN!

Mohan had a heart attack.

Mohan really loved that house.

Mohan wouldn't have wanted that.

Mom married Dad. She never dated anyone.

Mom, can we make pancakes for dinner like he used to?

Mom, get out! We need to do our project.

Mom, I told you.

Mom, I'm hungry!

Mom, stop.

Mom, this sari is so uncomfortable.

Mom, what are you doing here?

Mom, what is he talking about?

Mom, where are you?

Mom, you're being such a bitch!

Mom!

Mom! Kamala! Stop!

Mom?

Mom.

More so right now.

More than anything else,

Most of my team

Mother...

Moved to the United States in September 2001.

Mowgli didn't run away. He was lost after a tiger attack.

Mr. Chan, it smells like shit over here.

Mr. Schleicher, allow me to introduce professional working actress

Mrs. Paloma, that's gonna be me

MUN fam, we're gonna crush this diplomacy so hard,

Mwah!

My closest Indian friend is a woman I met seven minutes ago.

My cousin will take me to BevMo to get booze.

My dad also has too much work to do.

My dad let me have a sip of Cristal at New Year's.

My dad's your biggest fan.

My doctor says any day now.

My eyes saw my father's soul in the body of a coyote.

My favorite color is beige, and my dream is to be an accountant.

My favorite part is that traffic is separated into two directions.

My first boyfriend will be my husband,

My friends just assumed it, and I never corrected them,

My husband, Pradeep, had testicular cancer.

My legs are fine. Everything's fine.

My life's kinda like Home Alone,

My mom is such a bitch. I never get to do anything.

My mom just sent this to me.

My mom won't let me leave the house, except for school events.

My mom would be mad if she found out I came here,

My mom's super pissed at me, and now she won't make us any snacks,

My parents don't know about you... at all.

My pleasure.

My real e mail address.

My roommate, Nick, is Native American,

My whole world is about boys.

Nah. I gotta write a thing,

Nah. That sounds busy. I like mine.

Nalini had not forgiven Devi  for drinking at a no parents party

Nalini, calm down. She's not with Paxton anymore.

Nalini, please calm down.

Nalini, please calm down.

Namaskaar, Maami, Maama. What she loves to do is cook.

Name seven groups the Nazis wanted to exterminate.

Nathan Lane.

Nature's engineer?

Nay, a better person?

Never mind.

Never when I was on the Security Council.

Next to Chipotle?

Nice and warm.

Nice to meet you.

Nice try.

Nice.

Ninety percent of their kids get into Ivy Leagues.

No child of mine shall go to someone's house in the evening

No matter how many points I score, my dad always ignores me,

No more of those.

No need to find me a sari to wear.

No offense, but they're mostly uggos.

No offense, Kamala, but I finally respect you.

No one can say "dick" in this house.

No one in America does that, Mom.

No one mentions how many spiders live here?

No one was standing in the corner making fun of it.

No problem.

No reason.

No tree nuts.

No way. Back off, poacher.

No way. I'm winning that Best Delegate hammer.

No, but I think my friend Rebecca could get me a job at Old Navy.

No, but it was used in a Peloton commercial once.

No, but thank you. She is very beautiful.

No, Dad, she didn't mean it.

No, for real.

No, I came on my own.

No, I didn't. I didn't have sex.

No, I don't want to marry anyone!

No, I got two brothers, both neurosurgeons,

No, I just got mad, which is something I'm working on.

No, I love it.

No, I meant about that fight with your friends.

No, I think you're crazy,

No, I was just... saying grace.

No, I went to a mindfulness workshop in Santa Clara.

No, I'm not embarrassed by your robots or by your weird clothes.

No, I'm not gonna do that.

No, I'm not. I have a different approach.

No, I'm serious. I had way too much of Trent's punch.

No, it's a ploy to get me back so that I have to move to India with her.

No, it's fine. I'm ready.

No, it's not because you're bad at sex.

No, it's not.

No, it's okay.

No, it's perfect.

No, man. We're watching Riverdale.

No, Mom, wait!

No, no, he can't. It's too risky.

No, no, no, I love those things about you.

No, no, no, thank you. We are vegetarians.

No, no, no. Get up.

No, no. Come, come.

No, no. I'm sorry. Until the day your kids graduate.

No, not yet.

No, really. I never kissed him or anyone.

No, she didn't say anything.

No, she would've bragged about those things.

No, thank you.

No, thanks.

No, thanks. I don't feel like going anywhere.

No, that was unrelated. That didn't have...

No, Trent just put his balls in it.

No, we weren't trying to avoid you.

No, you should go. Sixteen's not like a big birthday.

No.

No.

No.

No.

No. Dr. Ryan,

No. Fabiola, calm down.

No. He came to me as a coyote.

No. He would stand up for himself.

No. I don't care.

No. I don't drink during swim season. You gotta keep the body right, you know?

No. I meant more like talk to her...

No. I wish I had just listened to my family

No. I'll be faster this time.

No. I'm a biologist.

No. I'm gonna make it up to you.

No. I'm obviously Ravenclaw, like Eleanor.

No. It looks like a normal pimple.

No. It was good, Paxton,

No. It's kombucha mixed with apple cider vinegar.

No. Kamala is beautiful,

No. Like a punishment.

No. My mother's an actress on a cruise

No. No, I would never prank you.

No. Okay, I don't get it.

No. Our relationship is rock solid. Don't sweat it.

No. That's ugly.

No. Uh...

No. We call you the UN, because you are unfuckable nerds.

No. You should be upset for your weird taste in men.

No. You'd go with me and my dad.

No. You're correct.

Nom, nom, nom.

Nope, he'd just forgotten about her.

Nope. I'm not falling for her tricks.

Nope. It is the best tomato in all the world,

Nope. Nobody has a girlfriend.

Nor will I.

Normal teenagers end up in prison.

Normal. I just want to be a normal girl, who isn't called mean names,

Not a super chill time to be a brown person in America.

Not everything is about you and your problems!

Not everything is about you and your problems!

Not for Devi. For my personal use.

Not gonna happen, Sharon. You're basic.

Not in words,

Not just a temporary story?

Not only will you never drive the moped,

Not quite.

Not right now, you don't. I need your help.

Not that it's any of your business, but I'm kind of seeing someone,

Not that one ply trash Mom buys.

Not the clusters.

Not to make this about me.

Not too shabby for an event that kind of got off to a rocky start.

Not yet. I can't find him.

Nothing bad.

Nothing.

Nothing. I ran away.

Nothing. You're the one who's looking at me.

Now get to gettin'. I got a hot date.

Now he's pissed at me.

Now how about we celebrate your father?

Now I want to talk about a major event that could happen this week!

Now it is time for flavor city.

Now that you're having sex with Paxton?

Now they're doing it without me.

Now we're just letting him into our home?

Now you really need a home security system.

Now you're making that face you make

Now, as a wife, it's great to have your own opinions,

Now, everybody repeat after me.

Now, go sit next to your marks, and lock 'em down.

Now, grab your textbooks. We need to go.

Now, I need to help Kamala get ready.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna google how to buy a credit card.

Now, Ron doesn't take many kids, so...

Now, we've been seeing each other for months,

Now, why don't you tell us one thing you learned today at school.

Now, you give your dad a proper send off, okay? Get going.

Now, you may be asking yourself:

Now, you may be wondering

Obviously it wasn't, because, you know, it bit me.

Obviously, you won't need a dishwasher in India because you'll have servants.

Of academically focused, um...

Of all days, today she needed to be normal.

Of course he had friendzoned her.

Of course not.

Of course not.

Of course,

Of course, kanna. I'm a modern man.

Of course, sweetie.

Of course, you do because they're you,

Of course.

Of course. I know that, and I am so sorry

Of course. I love an unannounced parent...

Of course. Tonight is about you guys.

Of course. We're family.

Of course. Well, that goes without saying.

Of hanging with another teenage comedy fan.

Of Howard Gross’s favorite clients.

Of our entire friendship set to John Legend's "All of Me."

Of Sherman Oaks High School.

Oh, actually, I was planning to work at the Caltech library tonight.

Oh, believe me. He's ashamed.

Oh, but if you don't go,

Oh, can my daughter take a photo with you? You look so amazing.

Oh, careful, buddy. That pizza is hot.

Oh, come on. Try some fun nail art.

Oh, cool.

Oh, Devi, there have been many women

Oh, Devi, this is just terrific.

Oh, Devi!

Oh, did I tell you? I now do all my homework with a quill pen.

Oh, fuck. You're John McEnroe.

Oh, God, yes.

Oh, God.

Oh, god. Aunties approaching.

Oh, God. Fab and Eleanor.

Oh, God. Where's Devi?

Oh, God. You're not saying anything.

Oh, great.

Oh, hell no.

Oh, hell yeah. I'm there.

Oh, hey, um, I'm in your neighborhood.

Oh, hey. What are you doing here?

Oh, honey, I love you,

Oh, Howard, why don't you give him some cash, you know, so he doesn't starve.

Oh, I am so sorry.

Oh, I could do it,

Oh, I did? Weird.

Oh, I don't know, Ron.

Oh, I like your nails. Those chickens are cute.

Oh, I love a fountain.

Oh, I want a photo of you next to your cake head.

Oh, I wonder what else we have in common.

Oh, I'm not hungry. Thank you.

Oh, I'm sorry. I was too busy saving my patients' lives from melanoma.

Oh, I'm sorry. Is he an honors student? I had no idea. My apologies, Paxton.

Oh, is she? Is she in stable condition?

Oh, it wasn't so last minute for everyone.

Oh, it's not punch. It's grandma juice,

Oh, like the United Nations?

Oh, lord.

Oh, mama. That sure hit the spot.

Oh, maybe I was allergic to the shot.

Oh, Miss Vivian does not allow any sugar in the house.

Oh, Mom.

Oh, my God, kanna. Do you know how worried I was

Oh, my God, Paxton, stop it.

Oh, my God, Tiffany. Where did you get that top? I'm gagged.

Oh, my God, you guys. I should have never gone to the kickback without you.

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God! Oliver Martinez?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Dad!

Oh, my God. Did you not see my Snapchat?

Oh, my God. Fab, you have to see this.

Oh, my God. Grandma, go!

Oh, my God. I just realized

Oh, my God. I'm not gonna make it in time!

Oh, my God. I'm such an idiot. I'm so sorry.

Oh, my God. Is this a friggin' screening room?

Oh, my God. Really?

Oh, my God. Right.

Oh, my God. She's here.

Oh, my God. So much of you makes sense now.

Oh, my God. Sweetie, I totally forgot.

Oh, my God. You want us to move to India?

Oh, my God. You're not my mom. I'm so sorry.

Oh, my goodness. All of that swimming has given you some muscles.

Oh, my gosh. What is this song?

Oh, my name actually is Rick.

Oh, nah.

Oh, no.

Oh, no. He's fine.

Oh, no. My bad.

Oh, no. What did she do?

Oh, of course. Hello!

Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, oh, you mean, uh, like, have sex?

Oh, okay, great. You are familiar with that.

Oh, okay.

Oh, okay.

Oh, Prashant, please, please come in.

Oh, really?

Oh, shit.

Oh, shoot. Where are we gonna do it?

Oh, so Charlie's Angels.

Oh, so you're scared she's smarter than you?

Oh, Steve, you're so sweet,

Oh, thank God!

Oh, thank you so much.

Oh, that? I'm better now.

Oh, that's because I was born in 1969.

Oh, that's so sweet.

Oh, that's so wonderful.

Oh, this young lady is a very talented musician.

Oh, uh, okay. [chuckles]

Oh, um...

Oh, wait. That Clippers game was valid, brah.

Oh, wonderful. Could you take me to The Home Depot?

Oh, yeah?

Oh, yeah? Guess what? My mother leaving was pretty hard on me too.

Oh, yeah? I mean, any time I liked a boy in high school,

Oh, yeah? That Paxton?

Oh, yeah? Would a dork be sleeping with Paxton Hall Yoshida from school?

Oh, yes, it does!

Oh, you didn't.

Oh, you know what? I am not falling for this one.

Oh, you poor thing.

Oh, you think I'm hiding her now,

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh! [laughs] What, this old thing? Priceless family heirloom.

Oh! I just ironed your socks for the big game.

Oh! She's about to drink it.

Oh! So he's mad at you for lying about having sex with him.

Oh! That's why Jonah's been such a big help.

Oh! Try to do it upright in the supply closet.

Oh! What the hell?

Oh! Which home?

Oh! You finally figured out you're a Gryffindor like me?

Oh! You know what? I almost forgot.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh. [laughs]

Oh. Drugs are, like, cool now? I didn't realize

Oh. How's that classic three and two?

Oh. I'm sorry. That sucks.

Oh. Really? Why was that?

Oh. Sure. Yeah.

Oh... thanks.

Oh... yes.

Okay, but we have to do this fast.

Okay, but, like, who wouldn't want to get married

Okay, bye.

Okay, cool.

Okay, fine.

Okay, great.

Okay, great. Then why don't you raise her?

Okay, I did take off my dress and leave it in his car,

Okay, just stand flat to camera

Okay, Kamala, if you please.

Okay, look. You go back in there. You talk to him.

Okay, look... I can say this because I married an Indian woman

Okay, Russia. How exactly are we supposed to get alcohol?

Okay, sir, you don't have to say it like that.

Okay, so catch me up.

Okay, so now you know I have a secret boyfriend.

Okay, so you want to talk about how to make it better with them?

Okay, sure. Uh, have fun.

Okay, that was dark.

Okay, that was my last impression.

Okay, we need to get him out of here before Prashant or Aravind see him.

Okay, we really weren't discussing that, Ben.

Okay, well, with your permission, I'd still like to play it.

Okay, yeah. It's true, but could you not tell anyone?

Okay!

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. All right.

Okay. Awesome.

Okay. Does seem like you had those locked and loaded.

Okay. Good, good.

Okay. I guess I'll go look.

Okay. I guess it's fair to call that a yell.

Okay. I think we're safe.

Okay. I'm sure whatever you wear will be very nice.

Okay. I've had my fill of socializing.

Okay. It doesn't seem like you'll be storming anywhere.

Okay. Let's just stick to the plan.

Okay. Maybe I've been distracted,

Okay. Now it's weird.

Okay. Now that you guys are all done with that nonsense,

Okay. So how's that group project coming?

Okay. Then which of the boys in your class do you like?

Okay. Well, what about those vents?

Okay. Well, you know what?

Okay. Well...

Okay. What is it?

Okay. Why don't we get started?

Okay. You used the grief journal.

Okay...

Oliver, do you think her fit, shapely body ruined the video?

Oliver! What are you doing?

Oliver's here.

OMG. Devi's railing Paxton H Y!

On a float sponsored by Ziploc.

On a more civilized note,

On a Weight Watchers cruise.

On behalf of Ben, Devi,

On how to hook up?

On me...

On the fact that Blake Griffin was at his Bar Mitzvah.

On the part of the highway where you died in a horrible accident.

Once you're done with the chimney,

One day, you will walk again.

One from Eleanor's dad and another from...

One of them is entirely in Korean.

One point eight million dollars!

One: I'd like to be invited to a party with alcohol and hard drugs.

Only about 20 to 30 percent of the population in India

Only got 28 kids into Ivies last year, but I wanted 30.

Only to inspire others to try to achieve the impossible.

Oof! Ooh!

Ooh! [giggling]

Ooh! Or the Fannings.

Or a bird, or a gentle breeze, or

Or a coyote, whoo!

Or an adult professional woman.

Or are you good to just go into your garage and have sex with me?

Or at least on top of Model UN

Or at least the middle of an Indiana Jones movie, but it's not.

Or do you guys have to take a driver's test later?

Or dressing like a park ranger for the rest of your life?

Or go to community college? That would help.

Or how in this kneeling position, she could smell her deodorant.

Or I say that I'm gay!

Or I will personally call all the Ivies and tell them not to admit you.

Or in the hair.

Or is it to watch a bunch of teenage boobs bounce around?

Or maybe it's because you want to do some spring cleaning

Or maybe it's my bitchin' personality

Or maybe take Kamala with you.

Or my insane PowerPoint skills.

Or sharing needles.

Or that Devi would be jealous of her?

Or the first half of it at least.

Or we could pass a resolution right now.

Or whether we, quote, "had too much going on."

Or worse, working in Jersey Mike's.

Or your dad was in jail for embezzling money.

Or, uh... Or something. Was there bee pollen in it?

Ordered our usual.

Ouch! I bet that hurts worse than that coyote bite.

Our family is complete.

Our first topic today is climate change.

Our Marseilles trip is still on.

Our Pandit in an Uber?

Our pleasure, Pandit ji.

Our recycling bins can't take much more of this.

Out.

Over my dead body.

Ow, my shoulder!

Ow. Goddamn it!

Parents found her a nice boy back home to marry.

Parents never spoke to her again.

Particularly, juicy rumors about sex

Paxil, Lexapro, Xanax, Zoloft? I'll try anything.

Paxton H Y.

Paxton Hall Yoshida just kissed Devi Vishwakumar.

Paxton Hall Yoshida just seemed so much more,

Paxton Hall Yoshida made every other dude in school feel bad about himself.

Paxton Hall Yoshida, the hottest guy at Sherman Oaks High.

Paxton Hall Yoshida. Ever heard of him?

Paxton just publicly acknowledged you.

Paxton was never my boyfriend, and we never did anything.

Paxton was stung by these little digs at his intelligence.

Paxton was texting her... to go to his house?

Paxton, can I talk to you?

Paxton, I would never make fun of your sister.

Paxton, Trent, and Devi.

Paxton!

Paxton!

Paxton! Devi knows all about him.

Paxton! What are you doing here?

Paxton?

Paxton?

Paxton?

Paxton? Mr. Cheekbones from the hospital? The one I caught in your bed?

Paxton. Think about Paxton.

Paxton's chiseled face actually worked a miracle.

Peace out, virgin.

Peace.

Perhaps she's gotten her arms stuck

Perhaps until graduation.

Phil took some shrooms. He's having a bad trip.

Picked up my dad's tennis ball,

Please close your mouth.

Please come, sit.

Please cure her as a reward for my virtue."

Please forgive me.

Please go. That street is permit parking only!

Please just tell my mom I'm not coming home

Please leave. You're dismissed.

Please, don't stare at me, Mother.

Please, sit.

Please. Look, it won't take that long.

Pleasure is all mine.

Plenty of amazing people have died as virgins.

Plus, his eyes...

Plus, some fan fiction where Jughead kisses Harry Potter.

Point made.

Point of order. That's not even how Model UN works.

Popcorn machine coming soon.

Popping my cherry, Doc.

Pragupshmala?

Prashant, I noticed that you carry your cell phone in your front pocket.

Prashant, we should set her up with your little brother.

Prashant, you must be hungry.

Prashant?

Pray you get into Princeton.

Prescribe me Adderall so I can beat Ben Gross."

Presentations are due on Monday.

Pretty crazy I came in and crushed it at Model UN with zero prep.

Prime locker location. Ben Gross is still a dick.

Principal Grubbs, if it's okay with you, I'd like not to press charges.

Probably a lot.

Probably May 2018, when his dad's flight

Probably not.

Prodigy.

Promise me you'll be home by 11:00.

Psst. [whistles]

Put in your address, and you'll find a bunker in your neighborhood...

Really thought you were gonna be younger. Your username has a 69 in it.

Really?

Really?

Really? How wonderful!

Really? That's awesome.

Rebecca seemed really happy.

Rebecca uploaded your pictures to her Wix site. You want to see?

Rebecca, look. We kissed one time.

Relax. It's just for two days.

Remind me again, Aravind Periyappa, were you ever married?

Removed his testicle, and now he's running the 10K.

Renal failure is what keeps me up at night.

Rent out a black box theater

Reverse cowgirl.

Right now, it kinda feels like everyone in my life is just...

Right there. That was unlikable.

Right, guys?

Right, the sex.

Right.

Right. Right, right, right.

Russia, you're a narc, but if you give me your nukes,

Said it was a fun way to mix professional and casual.

Same way Transformers work. You just push a button, and it does it.

Same.

Say goodbye to my little friend!

Scram! Get out of my dad's garden, you lousy coyote.

Seat's taken.

See you at school.

See, they're all laughing at anyone who drinks it now.

See? I thought I was ready, but maybe I'm not.

See? It isn't her.

Seriously, though,

Sexton, Six Pack...

Shall we go?

Sharon took me to see Spamalot.

She almost forgot a much more exciting new memory.

She also called me a narc.

She called and texted, but Jonah said that I should ignore her

She came from Chennai, went to UCLA for her doctorate,

She can say whatever she wants to me 'cause I'm not the irresponsible girl

She could help out Paxton and Eleanor.

She could lose Fabiola and Eleanor. Then she would have no one.

She didn't know what to do.

She didn't think of herself as Indian Indian like these girls,

She didn't want her usual things.

She didn't want to get married,

She felt as if she'd met this coyote before,

She fought me every time.

She gets her braces off tomorrow.

She gets to be on her phone. How come you're not yelling at her?

She had an intense vibe.

She had been a really good friend to go behind Eleanor's back

She had dug herself out of a hole with Paxton,

She has her good days.

She is here.

She is the one who's ruining my life by moving me to India.

She is?

She is. We have a lot of doctors in the family.

She just brought a lot of passion to her role as Equatorial Guinea.

She just kissed Paxton fricking Hall fricking Yoshida!

She knew the next logical step was to come out to some humans,

She knew the storm that was about to be unleashed on her.

She knew the truth: she was a weird loser,

She moved in after Mohan's passing to complete her PhD at CalTech.

She posted a Boomerang of her doing jumping jacks.

She said she was gonna open the TV instead of turn on the TV.

She said, quote, "I wish you were the one who had died."

She thought a wild animal was her dad.

She thought she could land the role and be back

She used to get bullied pretty bad...

She wanted something else.

She was a friggin' sexual conquistador

She was a gambling addict.

She was a hero to all the nerds,

She was cool. Gave us extra chips.

She was hooking up with someone out of her league?

She was supposed to be here an hour ago.

She was wrong on both accounts.

She wasn’t really on speaking terms with her two best friends,

She, uh, truly obliterated the competition.

She'd be back to being nothing more than the school's sob story.

She'd really love to put it on her Instagram.

She's a 15 year old Indian American girl from Sherman Oaks, California,

She's as pure as the driven snow.

She's Devi's therapist,

She's just a little girl.

She's just a pitiful, lonely, wheelchair girl without a freaking dad?

She's just so... Indian.

She's no daughter of mine.

She's not. She's on a cruise ship off the Yucatán.

She's obsessed with me.

She's one of my dad's clients.

She's super fashionable and way cooler than me.

She's telling the truth, Dr. Vishwakumar. She fell in the pool at the party,

She's the daughter you actually wanted.

She's the reason I started acting in the first place.

Sherman Oaks High is a good Ivy feeder school.

Shira plays field hockey with Zoe, so she invited us.

Shit. What time is it?

Should reach an agreement before we listen to countries

Should we wait a little bit longer?

Shouldn't you be at Stanford, like, playing frisbee with a computer?

Shouldn't you be counting your friends on two fingers?

Shouldn't you like storm down and get her?

Shut up, dude. It's good.

Shut up. My dad's hot.

Sí, por favor.

Sick.

Simple. Her friends told him.

Since a couple of days ago when we became inseparable.

Since I only asked two of you here.

Since Mohan's untimely death and Devi's paralysis.

Since the whole school now knew what a psycho liar she was,

Since we are brainstorming, I actually have some ideas, too.

Sit down. Get your slice on.

Sleeping next to our bodies is a let down

Slogans are supposed to be short and sexy.

Slower.

Slower.

Smacking is still an acceptable punishment in many minority cultures.

Smart to date a techie and not a fellow actor.

Snowmanning.

So are you Paxton's new girlfriend?

So as soon as Ben started dating Shira, her friends became his friends.

So before we go back into the hotel,

So Devi was grounded  and forced to become a house servant.

So disappointed in you.

So do you need to stretch or something,

So do you think you can set aside your rivalry

So get out of town,

So go get 'em, Devi!

So here's the thing.

So how about both Ben and Eve, why don't you go join Eleanor and Fabiola?

So I can be a better mom to you.

So I can be miserable and realize the person I love the most

So I can give you this helpful info.

So I decided to have it made after my favorite star.

So I don't think I'm gonna go to the game.

So I gave her a change of clothes.

So I guess being a workaholic runs in the family.

So I guess I was just really telling you a future truth.

So I guess I'd say him.

So I guess you'll just have to figure it out on your own.

So I should beat up Ben Gross?

So I stayed up all night, and I made a photo montage

So I thought I would follow up on our conversation from the other day

So I thought of a few ways you guys can make it up to me.

So I understand if you prefer Jonah's company over mine.

So I... I hope that you're not feeling weird, or awkward,

So I'll be better at driving than a sober person.

So I'll be his beard until I can springboard off of him

So I'll be nicer to my stepmom.

So I'm going to my first party.

So I'm gonna go.

So I'm just gonna blame Joyce for it.

So I'm the wrong person to ask.

So if things go well, I might start dating Paxton or something.

So is part of Ganesh Puja kicking lockers in anger?

So it can really go either way.

So it seemed like hooking up might still be a possibility.

So keep quiet, don't raise your placard,

So let's all get some sleep.

So let's not have any of the usual Devi nonsense.

So let's stop yelling at each other and look for the sheet music together,

So listen, I'm sorry my mom was so crazy to you the other day.

So many tears, I had to wipe down the chair after he left.

So maybe I'm an idiot for saying this, but I can't help it.

So my mom can ship me off to India?

So no more weird lies about your sex life.

So no, it was not worse than having your mom abandon you.

So now Devi got ready for school under the soulful gaze

So now I have to go back to Trent's house.

So our group made an app called Bunkr.

So Paxton would like it, and maybe like her.

So prepare for Equatorial Guinea to do what Equatorial Guinea does best:

So she had no choice but to shove that memory back down

So she really had to focus on what she wanted:

So she swallowed her nerves and walked right in...

So shouldn't you guys cut me a little slack?

So sometimes she felt a little out of place.

So the stubble might, like, irritate your skin a little bit.

So the United States motions for a vote to table our amended resolution.

So there’s really only one person left.

So this was all a waste of time?

So today, Devi returns to high school.

So what is it you can do this year to succeed at something

So what was that yesterday?

So who has a boyfriend?

So who looks dorky now?

So why are you at this lame fest?

So why don't you two work it out...

So you agree with Ben Gross and the whole school

So you can go to India alone.

So you did know they were having sex? I'm confused.

So you know who's a cutie?

So you should come if you want.

So you thought you would just show up in the middle of the day at my school?

So you will stay here, and you will study with Kamala,

So you're not going to spread your dad's ashes?

So you're not mad?

So you're saying I should get over my sadness by getting really sad?

So you're ultimately very happy with your decision

So, are you gonna have a party or something?

So, Ben...

So, contrary to his loud, brash school persona,

So, Devi, what a pretty name.

So, Devi, what are you into?

So, do you think you might return home sometime soon?

So, Fabiola, what about you?

So, here we are...

So, I bet you're all wondering why I've called this family meeting.

So, I'm glad you came in today.

So, I'm good.

So, Joyce, to what do we owe your sudden return?

So, like, how would your app turn your phone into a gun?

So, like, only one of us could go? We couldn't both go?

So, like, what's your type though?

So, my dad dies, and suddenly, my friends are bitches?

So, not only did you disobey me by going to this party last night,

So, peace out. See you never.

So, she decided to host a classic gang, girls only, Jonah free sleepover.

So, that was pretty rough out there.

So, uh, how was your day?

So, uh, listen, you two are into sports, right?

So, Uncle tells me you're a dermatologist, Auntie.

So, wait.

So, what do you say we crank this party up

So, what do you think of my new hog?

So, what is it?

So, what is it?

So, will you help?

So, would you mind not telling your mom about this?

So, yes, Alex and I are going to Wetzel's Pretzels this weekend.

So, you thinking this is the one, folks?

So, you're back up on your feet.

So...

So... I just wrote out the mission statement and pitch

So... if you're not gonna buy me a thong,

So... should we start brainstorming some ideas?

So... your grounding is over.

Sociopaths get shit done, Fab.

Some crazy things happened, and we both have something to tell you.

Some of us spent months preparing for that trip.

Some old loser was telling me that I'm too Indian,

Someone should use it.

Something that'll be on the future AP tests?

Sometimes I also wish I was the one who had died.

Sometimes these Indian guys come down the aisle on a horse!

Sometimes, the pain we feel is too hard to say out loud.

Soon is great. It's just...

Sophomore actually means "wise fool" in Greek,

Sorry I brought it up.

Sorry, but I think you did.

Sorry, guys. No can do.

Sorry, I haven't.

Sorry, Nalini Auntie. Of course, I'll stay here

Sorry, we don't have Bagel Bites tonight.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Sorry. Are you a model?

Sorry. Forget I said that. That was weird. I

Sorry. I was busy trying to find the perfect spot

Sorry. It's been a minute.

Sorry. That was my grandpa.

Sounds like it's time for you guys to upgrade to a four and three,

Sounds like someone has a crush.

Southern California. Can't complain.

Speaking of D's, did you see Zoe's Insta?

Speaking of warm moments with family,

Specifically her family.

Specifically towards life long female friendships.

Starting right now.

Steve, wait. We can no longer date.

Steve, you have nothing to worry about.

Steve!

Steve? Oh, my God! You scared the crap out of me.

Steve.

Stop molesting my friend!

Stop talking to me. Don't you get that I'm mad at you?

Store bought?

Straight to voicemail.

Strange.

Strings, lead us in.

Suck up.

Sunu, they don't care about your stupid home theater

Sure the nickname is weirdly masculine,

Sure thing, champ.

Sure, but changing your geography

Sure, uh, maybe... after school today at my place?

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure. Coming out to everyone,

Sure. Do you have any chocolate

Sure. Thank you.

Sure. Well, it feels like I'll just be in your way if I stay here tonight.

Sure. Whatever.

Sweats. I went for a run.

Sweetheart, your uncle and I have been talking for the past month or so

Sweetie, no.

Swim practice. What are you doing here?

Switching from AP French to AP Latin this year.

Take a right.

Take some fresh air.

Take your broke ass bike and get out of here.

Take your Dew and go.

Take your seats.

Talk to me. How does their lie make you feel?

Tan pants, tan shirt.

Technically, I didn't lie.

Tell him what you're feeling, hmm?

Tell me more, Dr. Walking HPV Infection.

Tell me the truth. Did they send you home on medical leave?

Tell me what you think, bro.

Telling me what makes me special.

Than any other Indian kid applying to college.

Than any other nation.

Than calling and texting.

Than the GameStop at the mall.

Thank you, and that's actually why I'm calling.

Thank you, Mr. Gross.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. Boy, am I thirsty.

Thank you. It's Forever by Mariah Carey.

Thank you. You can buy it on my website...

Thanks for being cool about me blackmailing you.

Thanks for bringing me home.

Thanks for considering. I love you guys.

Thanks for helping out today.

Thanks for letting me borrow your sweats.

Thanks for not ratting me out about Model UN.

Thanks for the ride.

Thanks for the ride. Go, Lakers!

Thanks to Devi,

Thanks to Paxton's extreme apathy toward school,

Thanks, Big P.

Thanks, Dad. I'll try.

Thanks, Fab, but I thought we were dressing hot today.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks. My dad tore down a historical landmark to build it.

That are lucky to even be included.

That boy that came to the restaurant last week.

That can take a lot out of you.

That could've been used to mitigate the atrocities of the second World War.

That doesn't mean I deserve to be grounded for two weeks.

That doesn't mean I won't ever be.

That felt so great to say.

That have happened in your life over this last year.

That he's not beautiful?

That her and Fabiola have been keeping from me,

That if she didn't step up her friend game,

That is a beautiful thing.

That is all we need.

That is pretty classic dork behavior.

That is until she assumed Eric Perkins could remain upright

That is until she remembered that her best friends were coming,

That Jeep ride just solved all her problems.

That losing both your best friends isn't bothering you at all.

That makes way more sense.

That marches to the beat of her own drummer.

That must've been really hard.

That my light tread is too elegant to be detected by the human ear.

That only cares about popularity and Paxton,

That sounds rad. Let's do it.

That sounds really bleak, Eleanor.

That sounds sexually confusing.

That story is freaking amazing.

That textbook has been blessed. If it touches the ground,

That this is our last first day of sophomore year we'll ever have.

That took long enough.

That was a friendship punch.

That was kinda racist of me.

That was like a straight up Red Riding Hood, man.

That was like an insult, but ended with some flirty touching?

That was very hard on me.

That we'll be doing beach vacations on the top of Mount Everest.

That will disgrace me and my descendants for generations.

That would actually make you happy...

That would change that.

That would leave him with a very bad impression of our family.

That you can cook, clean, and cater to their son's needs.

That you felt comfortable enough to tell us this.

That? That jeans and blazer?

That's awesome, but why are you crying and screaming?

That's bullshit.

That's currently docked in the vibrant city of Cancún.

That's disgusting.

That's gotta feel good.

That's great.

That's how we hotheads boil over.

That's it. It's over. I'm giving up acting.

That's Jaya Kuyavar.

That's like North and South Korea becoming friends.

That's like ten percent of our grade. What is it?

That's lying.

That's messed up, dude.

That's my sister, Preethi.

That's not the point.

That's not what's happening here, and that also feels a little racial.

That's not why you don't wanna go.

That's pretty rude, Rebecca.

That's so unfair.

That's super soon, which is great.

That's very rude, Devi.

That's very touching, um...

That's where I get all my frigging vitamins.

That's why I borrowed your thigh high boots.

That's why I hate all men.

That's why I recommend clients live as far north on their blocks as possible

That's why I'm leaving you to follow my dreams.

That's why it's cool we're friends.

That's why it's cool we're friends.

That's why on my acting resume I say I know how to ride a motorcycle.

That's why our cat only has one eye now.

That's, like, immoral.

The actors are also older than Mom.

The bird must have done it.

The boy's parents have two Mercedes.

The cashier will pay for your items personally,

The Clippers have been better than the Lakers for years.

The concert starts in 30 minutes.

The cousin of the wolf!

The cousin of you.

The crossing guard? No.

The Doobie Brothers?

The first "F" she'd ever gotten was on this test of friendship.

The guidance counselor says that parents aren't allowed

The Hollywood sign, Venice Beach, Olive Garden.

The Hot Pocket.

The idea that a girl in Model UN

The janitor said I reminded him of his nephew.

The ****, the disabled,

The keys will be hidden. End of discussion.

The lack of discipline and respect here is astounding to me.

The last one you were at, you got bitten by a coyote,

The lead?

The love seat.

The most intimidating place at school...

The moved up the launch of 2 Chainz's new line of spiced rum,

The OG crew hanging out.

The one here, or the one I'm being dragged to in India?

The one in my building smells like an old person's mouth.

The only person who hurts themselves at parties is you.

The other night, there was a coyote in my backyard,

The other two went to MIT,

The pain will subside because you are a good family.

The police won't work with just anyone.

The postcards were nothing but a charade.

The problem with being a security expert is allowing someone to...

The queer community, Jehovah's Witnesses, and, um...

The rest of the school called them the gently racist nickname, the UN.

The rotting tomatoes are attracting rats.

The Russian exchange student?

The Russian Federation formally surrenders all nukes to Equatorial Guinea.

The statistical odds that I would lose my virginity

The table you were sitting at after you and your aunt

The time is now 4:55.

The Trust Bird.

The truth was she was more flowered than a Rose Parade float.

The US contributes far more carbon emissions

The US has shown they can't be trusted with sensitive information,

The US is appalled. Nay, it's sickened at the state of our world.

The usually slick talking Ben Gross was for real off his game.

The View would grind to a halt.

The Wikipedia page on India.

The worst criminal in our neighborhood

Their friend had become completely unhinged.

Their only concern was that their last boarder,

Then again, my eyes can't really pick up anything below six.

Then don't drink it!

Then every year, I can go leave flowers

Then he'll have to go out the front door,

Then I don't have to get half naked every time I need to go to the bathroom.

Then I got here and the nurse told me all this happened

Then I will stay here with you.

Then I'm doing it too.

Then I'm stealing this, and you can have Chinese Club.

Then maybe I wouldn't be divorced.

Then she ran off with an American man.

Then tell me. Who is it?

Then we'd both have an equal job.

Then what makes you interesting?

Then why did I get a million texts from people

Then why did you punch me?

Then why do the other ones look so bad?

Then you can kill the Nazis with your gun. Bam. War is over.

There are more boys coming and going in this house

There are people in Siberia who'd kill to be this hot.

There are so many flavors here.

There could be shit up there. You don't know.

There is nothing to worry about, my love!

There must be some pretty girl you have your eye on at school.

There was a dead body found on the 101.

There was Brian Lakestone, who got dropped off at school on a motorcycle,

There was no medical reason why, but they were definitely not working.

There was not.

There was only one other person who could raise her spirits...

There we go.

There's a realtors' convention here tonight,

There's no food in here, except for popcorn,

There's no such thing as a friend break. You're either friends, or you're not.

There's not. The room was cleaned over the summer.

Therefore, I no longer require a colorful appearance.

These are high schoolers?

These ceramics are quite comforting.

They all think I was faking being paralyzed.

They always do.

They basically want him to marry his own mother.

They become as unruly as the Council of Ricks.

They did?

They don't even count Cornell and Penn as Ivies.

They don't know...

They have a pool. They have a gym.

They have bugs in them. I need to buy some spray.

They have the Oscars there.

They just won't date you.

They made me do it. They bullied me.

They said my hands were too sweaty to fold clothes.

They seem cool here,

They use hella cushy soft toilet paper.

They were dancing and chanting,

They were very old, and hard, and covered with lint.

They'd have to be as fast as a Björn Borg serve

They'll be calling all of us Mr. Worldwide,

They're not forcing me.

They're the ones who told me to throw it.

They're too young for love, and frankly, to have a life.

Things got complicated for this little family.

Think of this as a ride on a tour bus

This all just feels so strange at the moment.

This allowed Ben Gross to dine out for years

This boy is clearly an idiot, like this umpire.

This household is out of control!

This is a clear violation of our pact.

This is a journey you're meant to take alone.

This is a one.

This is amazing.

This is Devi. She's cool.

This is exactly what I told you guys not to do.

This is Fabiola Torres, captain of the high school robotics team.

This is Ganesh Puja, baby.

This is gonna sound insane, but I thought it was my dead dad.

This is huge.

This is John McEnroe.

This is my boys' medium polo instead of my usual large.

This is my dad's car, and I only have a permit.

This is my fault for keeping the windows so clean.

This is my living room.

This is my new favorite song.

This is my turf. You don't see me showing up to orchestra

This is not gonna be your typical history class.

This is one of the few situations where chamomile can't soothe my nerves.

This is perfect. I've always hated coming here.

This is so embarrassing.

This is so unfair. Do you see what Kamala is doing?

This is the city of Charles Manson and Harvey Weinstein!

This is the one day I have to be nice to you.

This is what wine tastes like?

This is why the American school system is failing,

This is why your whole school hates you!

This is worse than if it were happening to me.

This isn't about me. We're talking about you right now.

This Kanye deal is really complicated.

This kickback was the perfect chance to show Paxton that she could be cool

This Model UN trip just might be the best decision she's made all year.

This project is not yet done?

This reminds me of a problem I want to talk to you guys about.

This seems like a very private conversation.

This slaps. Come in.

This small platitude was more than Ben could handle.

This suit is Anjelica Huston for Kohl's.

This table looks like trouble.

This thing with your friends,

This was gonna be a bloodbath.

This was it.

This was the first puja they had gone to

This way, you don't actually have to say it.

This week, we're gonna break up into groups to pitch app ideas

This will be killer on our transcripts.

This year, we're rebranding.

This? I don't know what this is.

This.

Those are for my work associates.

Those are some of the best adjectives there are.

Those kids are real losers.

Those responses were very hurtful.

Those things are pretty unforgettable,

Though there is pain,

Thought maybe we can hang out, but, uh, it seems like you're busy, so...

Thousand dollars sound good?

Three minutes.

Three months after Devi's paralysis set in,

Through some of the darkest moments of our history.

Thus, Equatorial Guinea would like  to formally request permission

To a straight boyfriend.

To acknowledge the pain you so clearly feel.

To an engineer.

To be a better friend.

To be able to stay here with you in California.

To be honest, I don't see how you would be different

To be honest, I'm actually relieved

To being betrayed by her supposed best friends.

To bring you home souvenir.

To build seawalls to protect coastal areas from rising sea levels.

To cool jocks like you or me,

To do something fun, like practice PSATs,

To drag you home. [chuckles]

To find a lesson that was outside the box for you guys.

To find preventative treatment for Lyme disease.

To Ganesh Puja?

To get turnt.

To go with you, or to just, like, sit alone?

To have your cousin help you onto the toilet?

To keep the employees interested in earning a paycheck.

To keg, or not to keg?

To Michael B. Jordan in Tuscany?

To nuke the United States.

To nuke the United States.

To somebody that hot are incredibly low.

To spread her dad's ashes today.

To that end, do not touch the clock, Devi.

To the Billboard Music Awards got canceled.

To the general blindness of most tennis umpires.

To the person in school that everyone is gonna be jealous of.

To travel halfway around the world to pursue her dreams

To use the S word anymore.

To where it came from.

Today I learned that if you forget your wallet at the grocery store,

Today is Ganesh Puja.

Today is your father's birthday, and...

Today was the least lonely Ben had felt in a long time.

Today we're doing a real live chemistry experiment.

Today's lunch will determine whether or not she has a happy life.

Tomorrow is Mohan's birthday.

Too many teeth. I can see all of your teeth.

Too much going on, for Ganesh Puja? That bitch.

Took things slow. Just got to know each other.

Totally.

Trent, did you do the logo?

Trust me, but after all you've been through,

Trust me, whatever you guys have going on, my shit's bigger, okay?

Trust me.

Trust me. Scroll.

Trust me. Whatever you guys have going on, my shit's bigger, okay?

Trust.

Trying to communicate with her from the other side,

Turn on the AC?

Turns out, he's not that useless after all.

Twist.

Twist. This is surprising.

Two months? Why didn't you call me?

Two rows of seats. Dolby 5.1 surround sound.

Two secret boyfriends have entered this house

Two: I'd love for my arm hair to thin out.

Typical. And her name is Shira.

Tyra says the broken down baby doll is the most editorial look.

Ugh, well, I hope you're done with your grounding soon,

Ugh.

Ugh. I'm sorry.

Uh

Uh huh, ready when you are.

Uh huh, yes. I know Ben Gross is having a party.

Uh huh. Yeah, right.

Uh oh, it's an atomic bomb... [imitates explosion]

Uh oh.

Uh, all right. Can I get little computers?

Uh, before you go, I wanted to ask.

Uh, c can I take the rest of my soda with me?

Uh, can I get a cup of that punch?

Uh, have you not seen Westworld?

Uh, he can go back out the window.

Uh, how did it go? Did you make it down there in time?

Uh, I do take offense to that.

Uh, I outgrew a nut allergy, so that's something.

Uh, I'd say 10:43.

Uh, I'm not skinny. I'm jacked.

Uh, it's fine. We can celebrate when you get back.

Uh, no, thank you. I prefer to lift my tea from dining table level.

Uh, okay, sure. I'll get right on it.

Uh, sure.

Uh, thank you for not thinking I'm an uggo.

Uh, this is my co worker, Steve.

Uh, would a not cool person wear... one dangly earring?

Uh, yeah, sure. I could make that work.

Uh, you know my niece, Kamala, right?

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh... excuse me?

Uh... Hi.

Uh... Jonah Sharpe is gay.

Uh... No. Yes, I'm sorry.

Uh... Russia.

Uh... Yeah, I'm gonna withhold my name for a moment. [chuckles]

Uh... yes, I do. And don't look so shocked.

Um, did something kinda weird happen? Or did I do something dumb at my party?

Um, I really like your suit, Fab.

Um, I think you're friggin' cool.

Um, just to get it out there, I'm gay too.

Um, Kamala, I brought you a small gift.

Um, she's kind of in an arranged marriage sitch.

Um, thanks for the ride and the kiss I mean the kiss

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um... I don't know. Honestly,

Unfortunately, her friends stunk.

Unfortunately, not everyone was as happy to see Joyce.

Unfortunately, those two hours began with her very uncool arrival.

United States, you have the floor.

Unless I turn out to be a natural.

Unless you plan on referring to that person a ton in the future.

Until she promises not to move.

Until she's old enough to rent a car.

Up, up. Racket head up, and through.

Upstairs!

Us, Indians, we get a little bit of money,

Verbs like "to party"?

Very different philosophies, but equally important.

Very inventive. Very inventive.

Very much so, Pandit ji.

Viva World War III!

Wait, please, comrades. You haven't even heard my proposal.

Wait, please!

Wait, you're asking me to tell you if I think you're bangable?

Wait. Are you mad at me or something?

Wait. Are you watching Riverdale?

Wait. He is human, right? He's not a robot?

Wait. I don't see you guys talk that much at school.

Wait. Is it that house?

Wait. Is that why you called that weird family meeting about AP Latin?

Wait. Model?

Wait. So who are you?

Wait. So you don't think I'm crazy?

Wait. This is a dream, isn't it?

Wait. We are smart,

Wait. What are you doing here?

Wait. Why do you look hot?

Wait. You guys have dinner together every night?

Wait. You have a boyfriend?

Wait. You're posting that to your grid?

Wait. Your text made it seem like this was an emergency.

Want to watch relaxing YouTube on how to make tea?

Wanted nothing to do with her.

Was a top entertainment attorney in Beverly Hills.

Was bathing my senile grandmother.

Was I not supposed to? I didn't even know you had a sister.

Was it just about the giant herpe on your face?

Was it the guys who was climbing the tree outside when I arrived?

Was it worse than having your mom abandon you?

Was just about the saddest thing I've ever seen,

Was like getting an intimate window into his mind.

Was that a choice, or did you lose your earring on the bus?

Was the one he was seeing with his dad in a few hours,

Was this the moment Devi had been waiting for?

Wasn't seeing Paxton all over the hottest girl in her grade.

Way more than just pistachio.

We all did, considering what we had to witness at the spring concert.

We already have your car,

We are glamorous women of color, who deserve a sexy high school life.

We are going to be unpacking some very difficult subjects...

We are going to the party, Devi, but not with you.

We are not perfect.

We are so glad

We ate nachos and watched two SpongeBobs.

We baked cookies, we gossiped.

We basically all have boyfriends now. Can you believe our lives?

We can get everyone drunk with Fabiola's bomb beer pong skills.

We can go together.

We can't do this without Devi.

We can't seriously be talking about nuclear war.

We could meet at my house.

We could plant a little garden here,

We could talk about my dead dad any time.

We could twiddle our thumbs while Atlanta becomes the new Atlantis...

We didn't finish our project,

We didn't know you were back in town.

We don't have to do this today, you know.

We eat and pray to Ganesh.

We go straight to Home Depot to buy a cement fountain.

We had to keep it a secret.

We have that trip planned to Marseilles next summer

We have to go away on your birthday.

We have to help her.

We have un million French verbs to conjugate over le weekend.

We just had the vents cleaned.

We just miss our old friend, but right now, you're not her.

We just need some space right now.

We know. We saw Paxton and Zoe sharing a big cookie at lunch.

We miss you too, Devi.

We need to address the real root of the problem.

We need to eat with kids our own age.

We need to talk to you.

We saw her. She's been living here, working at a Mexican restaurant in Encino.

We saw you drive off with him today.

We should feel really lucky that we're just a normal family.

We talked, and you should have a bed all to yourself.

We want Prashant to fall in love with Kamala and not me, right?

We want to talk about a different type of snack.

We will only weigh you down.

We will. Good luck with work.

We wouldn't be in debt to China.

We'll call you tomorrow. Aw!

We'll compare calendars tomorrow or something.

We'll figure it out. Later, skater.

We'll just take two of the tickets and go with your dad.

We're already borderline outcasts.

We're doing some research.

We're going to India?

We're going to sit in his hot tub and sing at each other.

We're gonna be breaking good.

We're just obsessed with fountains.

We're just two fans eating pizza and talking about cartoons.

We're more alike anyways.

We're not causing scenes everywhere. We aren't embarrassing.

We're not cool.

We're redoing my acrylic gels.

We're supposed to be best friends. I left a funeral to be by your side

We're talking Marcus Jones. We're talking Eddie Tan.

We're talking to the boys.

We're the only students who get to eat in the teachers' lounge.

We're trying to process all that's happened to you,

We've had a recent breakthrough, and it's

We've had some serious drama go down.

We've showed up to Model UN conferences a man down before.

Welcome to Facing History...

Welcome to mi casa.

Welcome to the Valley, folks,

Welcome, welcome. Take your shoes off. Uh huh.

Well, actually, that's a common misconception.

Well, all right. How do you want to look?

Well, as close as you can get without kissing.

Well, as you know,

Well, believe it, because I give zero F's.

Well, Cousin Manju is also a 28 year old virgin.

Well, except for your boyfriend, Alex Gomez.

Well, forgetting is not the goal.

Well, good work.

Well, honestly, his dad's my lawyer, and I owe him a favor,

Well, honestly, I only became good at Mandarin to spite you, so...

Well, I brought you a present.

Well, I didn't want to let myself go completely.

Well, I don't fake kiss and tell.

Well, I don't know. I mean, I...

Well, I guess I can't relate because I do win 'em all.

Well, I plan to work too.

Well, I think Gisele usually gets an outfit for her troubles, so...

Well, I think I should get a different therapist.

Well, I think you've learned your lesson,

Well, I won't be able to walk again tomorrow,

Well, I'll say it again. I'm not surprised someone has broken into this house.

Well, I'm certainly not fixing them here on my own.

Well, I'm gonna go study at a friend's house.

Well, I'm pretty good shaving. So that's probably why.

Well, if you blow her off, then actually, you are stupid.

Well, if you refuse to change your personalities,

Well, if you see that coyote again,

Well, just that we're like... mmm, regular.

Well, maybe if I kept my mouth shut, then you guys would've had a chance.

Well, maybe not in stride, but definitely in character.

Well, maybe she could think of one other person.

Well, nobody will remember that once we're cool.

Well, of course, Mister Shapiro.

Well, sitting courtside at an NBA game is also pretty Gram worthy, so...

Well, some might say Jonah is a little toxic...

Well, thanks for the apology.

Well, that should be fun.

Well, that was an emotional ride.

Well, that, and also, the portions are insane.

Well, that's definitely not my identity.

Well, that's not gonna happen, but I appreciate the sentiment.

Well, they'll certainly hear me.

Well, to be fair, it did seem like it was gonna happen eventually.

Well, uh... I'll see you at school.

Well, when I smelled it, it smelled bad,

Well, without it, I don't get your angle.

Well, you can count me out.

Well, you did abandon them to do an amateur fashion show

Well, you know Devi. She's a real firecracker.

Well...

Were you just at the Hot Pocket with Paxton?

Were you just trying to kiss me?

What a relief to see you're no longer a cripple.

What about Paxton? He must've liked it.

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

What are you doing?

What are you even wearing?

What are you hobbies and interests?

What are you talking about?

What are you up to?

What can I say? I wear a lot of hats. Now, you may be asking yourself,

What did I even do that was so terrible?

What did you do?

What do you do for it?

What do you mean by normal?

What do you think that means?

What do you think will happen to you on a full moon though?

What do you think Yoshida is, bro?

What do you think, Doctor Ryan? Do you agree with him?

What does it mean if a guy is suddenly really nice to you?

What good would that do? Huh?

What happened to you?

What I do want to talk about is Devi's progress.

What I meant to say was that I didn't want you to see me,

What I want to say is that I am...

What I'm about to tell you is pretty personal.

What idea? That I love my husband less because my roots aren't showing?

What if Anne Frank had an iPhone?

What if I played my harp for you?

What if it was my mom?

What if it's a college offering early admission?

What if Prashant came here tomorrow,

What if she's just 20 minutes away serving enchiladas?

What if there's an app that turns your phone into a gun?

What if we just kept this between us?

What if we worked together tomorrow?

What if Winston Churchill had Wi Fi?

What is going on? What happened?

What is it when I'm not here? Three secret boyfriends?

What is it, Eric?

What is that?

What is this show?

What is wrong with you?

What kind of mother would I be

What matters is, is that life is good now,

What nonsense. I'm looking at you right now.

What now, Mr. Chairman? I'm all nuked up.

What on Earth possessed you to misbehave this way, huh?

What she meant to say was sambar, idli, dosa.

What the ?

What the hell is going on here?

What the hell, Devi?

What the hell, Devi?

What the hell, Devi?

What the hell?

What the hell?

What the hell's going on here?

What thing with your mom?

What was that?

What was that? What happened to the window?

What were you thinking getting so close to that coyote?

What would you like to watch, Devi?

What you did out there took guts, even if it was accidental.

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What? [scoffs]

What? Devi, I was joking when I said that.

What? Don't like you? That's not true.

What? I'm a reader.

What? No, I don't have a crush.

What? No, it doesn't.

What? No, no, no.

What? No. Nobody even remembers that.

What? Oh, my God, Fab!

What? Oh, my God. What did you say to her?

What? Oh, right. We're supposed to be mad at her.

What? That Devi is having what?

What? That's impossible.

What? You can't sell it.

What's a poppin'?

What's going on?

What's going on? Are you okay?

What's going on? Why do we have a spooky Scooby Doo clock?

What's happening?

What's interesting about me is...

What's next? Prime Minister Modi on Postmates?

What's our goal for today?

What's so interesting about this show is everyone has different backgrounds,

What's taking them so long?

What's the goss? Who are we dating?

What's the point of all the ceramics in here?

What's the point of spending the night in Davis

What's there to talk about?

What's up?

What's your favorite bird?

Whatever happens in this gab sesh... stays in the gab sesh.

Whatever.

Whatever. It's a good idea from the smartest person in the room,

Whatever. It's mine.

Whatever. Just break up into groups of three.

When Billy met Patty.

When Devi's dad... died.

When did she get here, and why didn't she tell me?

When everyone is whispering about you.

When he said that, he was talking about you,

When I get back, let's celebrate with a mother son sound bath.

When I get into Princeton, I'm never coming back.

When I got a call you'd been eaten by a wild animal?

When I got back here,

When I lost the French Open to Ivan Lendl in 1984.

When I was in high school, I would've killed to have a birthday party

When I'm not doing that,

When most of them should just drop out and learn a trade.

When my sister's husband died, she stopped coloring her hair.

When she couldn't walk, I, um...

When she got a last minute audition for NCIS.

When the waiter says they're out of the entree you ordered.

When you become a famous designer, could I be your muse,

When you return to India, this behavior will be put to bed!

When you’re disappointed,

Whenever he experienced a setback, and last night was a real doozy,

Where a burglar can walk in at any time and murder me,

Where days are shorter.

Where do you want to go to college?

Where his greatest nemesis became an unexpected ally,

Where in just a few hours, the highly coveted golden gavel

Where is the poor bird?

Where shall I set up my cookies?

Where were you?

Where will you be?

Where? Where should I not look?

Where's Aladdin?

Where's this coming from?

Whether from a German bomber or

Which according to Devi

Which brings me to my plan.

Which brings me to my question.

Which I find pretty admirable.

Which is a whole other thing.

Which is interesting because Devi is forbidden from dating

Which is why she was struggling with these new complicated emotions.

Which pair of jeans is the fiercest?

Which reminds me

Which required too much locker room nudity for either of them.

Which you obviously are,

Which, it seems like you are.

Which, my dad says, means fake.

While buying our annual supply of toilet paper?

While you were all wrapped up in your Paxton stuff,

While you were trying to get a boyfriend of your own.

Who am I, Kate Hudson?

Who apparently run their dishwasher day and night.

Who are you going for?

Who are you trying to impress?

Who are you? What are you doing?

Who can get you a very nice wheelchair for cheap.

Who cares? You're with Paxton, right?

Who could burp the theme song to Game of Thrones.

Who doesn't give a shit about her real friends!

Who had just snagged her first kiss from a teenage Adonis,

Who has a girlfriend?

Who has much more interesting things going on.

Who hates doing Indian things?"

Who is it?

Who is president of the padded resume club.

Who lost her sheet music right before her concert started!

Who said that, Eric?

Who says we're not cool?

Who wanted to settle down with old Aravind,

Who was surprisingly sad for someone who should have seen this coming.

Who, me?

Who's with me?

Whoa, damn. You're hot.

Whoa, like, whoa.

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa! Devi, you came.

Whoa! Knock it off, wannabe pill popper.

Whoa.

Whoa. Kamala?

Whoa. That was like a crazy nerd fight.

Whoa. What are you doing?

Whoa. What is this room?

Whoa. You are?

Whoever this child is, I am through with her!

Whoo!

Whoop pa!

Whoops! He pulled his drawer out.

Whose dad dropped dead at a school function?

Whose futures you're trying to ruin.

Why are they here?

Why are you feeling bummed?

Why are you here?

Why are you looking at me?

Why are you looking at me?

Why are you lying to everyone about us having sex?

Why are you sneaking around my house and talking to my sister?

Why are you...

Why can't I just wear kurta and jeans like I normally do?

Why could we not sit there?

Why did you do that, Mother?

Why didn't you invite Eleanor and Ben?

Why didn't you tell us the truth?

Why do let that Ben Gross rile you up so much? He's like 5'2".

Why do you think Devi feels that way?

Why does it have to be today?

Why does it itch so much?

Why does the Hindu Association have to have puja at my high school?

Why don't I put that somewhere safe?

Why don't we bake cookies for the PTA?

Why don't we build a pillow fort, and watch a scary movie like Shrek?

Why don't we go outside? Hmm?

Why don't you head to the park?

Why don't you just let this idiot knock you up?

Why don't you just work here?

Why is sports icon John McEnroe narrating this tale?

Why is that guy so close to me? Does he not see me?

Why not give her the old razzle dazzle?

Why should I apologize?

Why would I do that?

Why would I fake that?

Why would you invite me to that?

Why? Aren't they liberal? I know you mom drives a hybrid.

Why? Did you butler quit?

Why? Is it laced with something?

Why? Was he protecting her?

Will circle back about it.

Will ruin all our lives.

Winning over old ass teacher types is my super power.

With a bag of frozen g****s from her purse.

With a freaking bassoon.

With a rhinestone phrase on the front that says "do me."

With all they've been through.

With available bomb shelters during the blitzkrieg.

With Bunkr, you can locate safe spots to hide within your neighborhood,

With genuinely balanced reactions to things,

With my Garbage Pail Kids,

With my white boyfriend.

With the coyote,

With the hottest teen in Los Angeles County.

With the incisive intellect of Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

With the most beautiful en suite you have ever seen in your life.

With your arms at your side like a paper doll.

Without taking a delicious box of confections for the parents.

Without your color commentary about all the, quote, "delusional uggos."

Woah, Devi, you look like an Indian Kardashian.

Won't necessarily change the problems that Devi is dealing with.

Wonderful! I'll get started on the paperwork.

Word of advice: just give up.

Would a dork be sleeping with Paxton Hall Yoshida?

Would allow anyone to dictate who she can be with.

Would be safely tucked away in his weird little briefcase.

Would it be okay if she sat in our rehearsal today?

Would one of you be able to give me a ride?

Would you do that with me?

Would you like to be my girlfriend?

Would you wanna grab food sometime?

Wow, Kamala. Wow!

Wow, Mom. You almost sold everything.

Wow, okay!

Wow, Paxton and Zoe. It's a pretty hot couple, huh?

Wow, this grandfather clock is so handsome.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow. Eleanor, I was prepared to make you do props,

Wow. Even a city slicker can't resist a healthy game time treat.

Wow. Even saying the word "stage" makes me feel better.

Wow. I almost didn't recognize you.

Wow. I don't think we've ever baked together.

Wow. I feel like I'm being pranked.

Wow. I'm sensing a lot of tension right now.

Wow. Like, I knew you were rich,

Wow. That card's dark.

Wow. That's crazy.

Wow. This is perfect.

Wow. What an amazing grandfather clock.

Wow. You really think you're hot shit, don't you?

Yeah, a lot of my fans are now.

Yeah, and Jonah's been our safe harbor in this chaotic life storm.

Yeah, and now she's refusing to go with her mom

Yeah, but he has a hot face.

Yeah, but my point is, even Shira and I have our ups and downs,

Yeah, but she's already disappointed I'm not girlier.

Yeah, but we could cancel if you want us to.

Yeah, but what are you doing here?

Yeah, definitely.

Yeah, definitely.

Yeah, Devi, please share your mumble with the rest of the class.

Yeah, everyone thinks you died.

Yeah, good call. You could, like, go to jail for that.

Yeah, I can do that.

Yeah, I can tell.

Yeah, I don't normally get zits.

Yeah, I don't really make a big deal about birthdays.

Yeah, I got them at Old Navy. I work there.

Yeah, I know he did,

Yeah, I know. What does that have to do with anything?

Yeah, I love it. It's, uh... It's me. [chuckles]

Yeah, I miss her.

Yeah, I think so.

Yeah, I think they do.

Yeah, I'm losing it, Doc.

Yeah, I'm sure you'd like to see my bare feet, sicko.

Yeah, I've been busy.

Yeah, Ira, I do, but I'm fasting today.

Yeah, it does.

Yeah, it was a lot.

Yeah, it's cool.

Yeah, it's fine. Take him a box of See's Candies.

Yeah, Kamala. Welcome to American teen soaps.

Yeah, like one of those tubes of Pillsbury cookie dough.

Yeah, not long ago.

Yeah, she's pretty upset.

Yeah, so basically, I'm the Hester Prynne of the Indian community

Yeah, sure.

Yeah, sure.

Yeah, sure. I'll do that.

Yeah, sure. Whatever.

Yeah, that comes up a weird amount.

Yeah, that'd be bad.

Yeah, that's it.

Yeah, they do. Hey, what's up, Trent?

Yeah, totally.

Yeah, we can't do that anymore.

Yeah, well, sometimes it's fun to make other people's days as shitty as yours,

Yeah, whatever. Just as long as we're done.

Yeah, yeah, she never did anything.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You still have to go to Malibu.

Yeah, yeah. Take your time going up!

Yeah, you are.

Yeah, you better go to your room before I give you a smack!

Yeah, you can come see the bike whenever you want,

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Also, Fab and I are allowed to have more than one other friend.

Yeah. He thinks we need to keep toxic people out of our lives.

Yeah. He's international and sexy.

Yeah. I can't wear that.

Yeah. I guess we both have tough conversations to look forward to.

Yeah. I guess you'll have to stick around and help Eleanor through rehearsals.

Yeah. I just feel bad for Eleanor.

Yeah. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.

Yeah. I like to watch Billions in the bath.

Yeah. I mean I even feel that way as a double zero.

Yeah. I thought it could be like a fun study break.

Yeah. I'm an idiot. Um...

Yeah. I've been using Ben's deodorant all week.

Yeah. No, it's crazy.

Yeah. Okay, Mom. I'll be good.

Yeah. She's also the lunch lady.

Yeah. Tag yourself in it.

Yeah. That part was good.

Yeah. That's frigging great.

Yeah. The last bit of water just drained out of my ear.

Yeah. The way he said it was lame, but I'm out too.

Yeah. We had a fun gal hang.

Yeah. We're good.

Yeah. What about it?

Yeah. Yeah, it was great.

Yep, I'm fine.

Yep. Someone's dating Paxton. [chuckles]

Yes, and I am your Matthew McConnicky!

Yes, I'm sorry, it is.

Yes, I'm sure.

Yes, it is, and I should give him a call back.

Yes, it is! I'm so proud of you.

Yes, Jonah. I see that now.

Yes, she is, Eleanor. Yes, she is.

Yes, that was Steve.

Yes, this is our home.

Yes, you are. You can do this.

Yes, you look like a careerist western woman,

Yes!

Yes!

Yes! His name is Prashant. He's an engineer.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes. I had to start from the beginning to understand their journeys.

Yes. I just need a minute of your guys' time.

Yes. Thank you for thinking of us. How is Arjun?

Yes. Yes, I am.

Yo, a coyote just ate one of the UN!

Yo, Devi.

Yo, I'm hitting up North End Pizza in Burbank to watch the game

Yo, yo, yo.

Yo, you still game for the kickback this weekend?

You almost made me drop this expensive ass beaver!

You and Shannon should go to the game without me.

You and the rest of the UN are in good company.

You are not going anywhere, young lady.

You are not to have any sexual contact with boys,

You aren't some Goody Two shoes who does everything you're told.

You assumed I had sex with Paxton, and I didn't correct you.

You can do sex.

You can do whatever you want.

You can make them at my house.

You can't find the one middle aged white man

You can't just go around wishing Nazis would kill classmates.

You cannot run in Los Angeles at night.

You come over here and sniff, and tell me there's not shit nearby.

You could actually learn a bit from her.

You could ask my dad to help you emancipate yourself like a child actor.

You could have AIDS.

You could sell it,

You could write a play about it.

You did, but I received other instructions...

You did.

You didn't make love to Paxton Hall Yoshida?

You didn't think it'd be that easy for her, did you?

You do have kind of a temper, huh?

You do not wish to be married?

You do you, Vishwakumar.

You don't always have to be so strong.

You don't do that

You don't get to keep the clothes.

You don't have to play if you don't want to.

You don't have to pretend to care about your ancestry or whatever."

You don't have to tell her if you're not ready.

You don't know me, but my name is Devi Vishwakumar.

You don't know what the hell you're talking about.

You don't look like you're asleep.

You don't need to go back there. Stay in the present.

You don't wanna go because you don't wanna say goodbye to him.

You fight back with your spirit, little one.

You found him in her bed?

You get that awful, suffering look on your face...

You gotta go.

You guys are my girls.

You guys are well on your way to becoming cool.

You guys know her better than anyone. You're the only people she'll listen to.

You guys look really young. Can I see some ID?

You guys saw her hit me, right? You know, my dad's a lawyer.

You guys should get going. You're gonna miss your plane.

You guys will just have to like what I make.

You guys, I'm really sorry. I don't know what I was thinking.

You had a big debate tournament.

You have a hot cousin.

You have literally never said that to me before.

You have my permission.

You have shown me so many fantastic places in the city.

You have the golden ticket. If you're willing to talk about it,

You have to be nice to them because you're Indian.

You have to go with your mom to spread your dad's ashes.

You haven't returned Devi back her dress that she took off in your car.

You hung out with them yesterday?

You Instagrammed your PSAT score.

You just don't want to give people the wrong idea.

You just got nuked.

You just have to model a few outfits.

You just hit me with something really big, and I'm trying to process.

You just like used straight up Jedi mind tricks on us.

You just made me come out to our whole class!

You just promised that you'd be there for us

You just seem lost.

You just stay here, and I'll get Kamala.

You just went from the person in school that everyone felt sad for

You keep having to rescue me at parties.

You keep my Devi on her toes.

You killed it. Like, it looks professional.

You know Arjun. He just installed a home theater.

You know he cannot get into heaven until you accept his death?

You know he's gay, right?

You know my age.

You know Sanchiti Bhattacharyya will be at puja, right?

You know that.

You know that's not where I was going with that.

You know what, David?

You know what? I just remembered. I have to go home,

You know what? I should've just let you drink Trent's ball juice.

You know what? I'm just too jealous to eat with you right now.

You know what? We’re gonna jump ship and check in with Fabiola,

You know what? Wear whatever you want.

You know what? You're right.

You know you sound like a sociopath, right?

You know, Benjamin, I really have to thank you.

You know, Eleanor is lucky to have a friend like you.

You know, get your acts together,

You know, I felt so terrible.

You know, I have an extra ticket, but only for someone who apologizes for nuking

You know, I support women.

You know, I was just at The Cheesecake Factory for lunch.

You know, I would've run away earlier

You know, I've been known to punch above my weight too.

You know, my kids ask about their grandparents,

You know, the link aggregator.

You know, the woman who threads my eyebrows is Indian.

You know, these things aren't really that fun

You know, this is a safe space. Go ahead.

You know, we're practically the Barrymores.

You know, when I was in school, my only extracurricular activity

You know, you're one to talk about regrets, Eleanor.

You know? You shouldn't call us the UN.

You left it on the table.

You lied to us?

You live in LA?

You look good.

You look great here.

You look like a sad librarian.

You lost the use of your legs for three months.

You made it seem like you understood the urgency of the situation.

You might call them the John McEnroe and Jimmy Connors

You might see your dad as a butterfly,

You might want to blow on it first.

You must be so proud of your daughter, our youngest lead actor ever.

You must be so tired after driving all the way from San Jose.

You must have a very busy day returning dresses to other smart girls

You must miss him a lot.

You need something, bro?

You need to spread Mohan's ashes.

You okay, Fab?

You okay?

You promise?

You really grew into your eyebrows.

You remember her useless white husband Ron?

You remember what it was. No need to...

You remember, the fight where Devi said this:

You said I wasn't your daughter.

You said you were just going to the bathroom. What the hell?

You seemed so popular, we didn't want to take up seats for your friends.

You should be a part of the play.

You should be proud of that.

You should get that looked at.

You should just go to the game. Take your sons.

You should really see the beaver for yourself.

You should.

You shouldn't wear so much makeup.

You snuck a boy into the house. Have you done that before?

You stand up for yourself, just like him.

You stayed.

You think I look like one of Paxton's girlfriends?

You think Mrs. Fields could do that?

You think she'd be into me?

You think you can look at a few skin tags? They're under my left breast.

You tweeted a "thank you" to a Target ad telling you to have a happy Labor Day.

You usually house a bag of Doritos in, like, 20 seconds.

You wanna be with me?

You wanna go mess with him?

You want any doughnuts with that?

You want me to model?

You want to be in my group?

You want to go check out the vending machines? My treat?

You want to go to Casa Mexico and see if it's her?

You want to spread his ashes?

You welcomed me into your home, and I've been lying to you.

You were a hillbilly tweaker. I guess you're skinny enough.

You were on Twitter the entire time you were in line.

You were so sober, you fell into the pool,

You were so traumatized by your dad's death,

You what?

You will both report here after school to do some unpaid labor in the office.

You will never drive, period.

You wouldn't use the phrase "ready to bone."

You'd have surface to air missiles, and also, BTS.

You'll be like Zayn and Gigi.

You'll carpe diem another diem.

You'll get a ticket!

You'll have to take someone else to the 21 Pilots concert

You're a douche.

You're a lifesaver.

You're a racist, Paxton Hall Yoshida!

You're a sweet boy.

You're a very smart boy with a very bright future.

You're allowed to take the apples from the fitness center.

You're an actress.

You're an inspiration to us.

You're bad like me.

You're being insane, Devi.

You're bringing it back to my dad, aren't you?

You're buffering, Eleanor.

You're cool.

You're disappointed.

You're dismissed.

You're doing great, Devi.

You're far too special for a stupid guitar.

You're fine, but you guys suck.

You're gay. I get it.

You're getting knee blood on the chair. It's unsanitary.

You're going to have to be better behaved than that.

You're gonna have hospital sex like on Grey's Anatomy.

You're gonna wanna keep a low profile,

You're gonna, like, make me spill my vodka cran.

You're gross, Gross.

You're having a no parents party?

You're having sex with Paxton Hall Yoshida!

You're here to cheer me up, right?

You're here?

You're in a legit love triangle.

You're in trouble!

You're joking. That was in sixth grade.

You're my only child.

You're my whole family.

You're never gonna believe where it ended up.

You're not perfect.

You're okay with that?

You're right.

You're right.

You're so lucky. You have a perfect family.

You're struggling to raise me 'cause you don't like me.

You're the girl whose dad died in front of her at a concert

You're the most beautiful girl in the world.

You're totally useless without your Commander in Dork.

You're welcome.

You're welcome.

You're... gay?

You've made it weird.

You've made your whole world about this boy.

You've no idea what he's been through. He has thyroid issues.

You've turned into this fake person

You've turned into this fake person

Your blazer makes me think you're trying to rope us into a pyramid scheme.

Your body looks so good in that over sized t shirt.

Your brother Arun, not the one who works at Massage Envy.

Your cat? No, I didn't.

Your favorite Hindu girl in the San Fernando Valley.

Your hair is so black.

Your instability makes this friendship feel unsafe for all of us.

Your mom's cool.

Your mother also misses you a lot.

Your parents can't force you to marry this guy.

Your parents must be so proud.

Your stats are amazing.

Your stupid heels are slowing us down. Take them off.

Yum, yum.

Yup. Paxton and me, totally happened.

'Cause you seem real thirsty. What are you doing here?

'Sup? [yells]

[all laugh] [Trent] Yo.

[both laugh] [door opens]

[both laugh] [knocking]

[both scream] [loud crash]

[both] To make conversation. Right.

[boy] Man... [girl] Oh, shoot.

[boy] Wait! What? [kids murmuring]

[camera clicks] [giggles]

[camera clicks] Okay.

[car honking] [tires screeching]

[cars honking] Oh, my God! Use your fricking blinker!

[chuckles] I'm so happy.

[class groans] [Ben] Just for one day, can we learn

[clock chimes] [screams]

[coughs] Exactly. [laughs]

[coughs] Whoa, maybe you should slow down.

[crowd gasps] [gavel banging]

[crowd gasps] [Nalini] Mohan!

[Devi yells] [crowd gasps]

[Devi] Ben Gross is not my friend. [Nalini] Why not?

[Devi] Don't be up with Steve all night. Ugh!

[Devi] Harish. Devi, hey.

[Devi] Yeah, it was so weird. [clears throat]

[eats popcorn] Fine.

[ends call] Uh... steal bones.

[Fabiola] How many likes have we gotten? Only two so far.

[game chatter on TV] Yes!

[gasps] [Ben] Wow.

[giggles] [phone buzzes]

[giggling] Okay. [giggling] Oh, my God.

[grandfather clock chimes loudly] [both gasp]

[growls] Yeah, he's sad.

[grunts] [students chattering]

[indistinct radio chatter] [sirens sounding]

[intense music playing] [sighs]

[Kamala laughs] [laughs]

[Kamala] Nalini Maami? [speaks Tamil]

[knock at door] [door opens]

[knocking on door] [girl] Are you okay?

[laughing] Really? What? No.

[laughs] Totally.

[laughs] Anyway, do you want the tickets? Why don't we go together?

[locker slams shut] That you started.

[male voice] Devi, come here. [clapping in background]

[McEnroe] Good lord. Yeah, so...

[McEnroe] He absolutely did not. Yeah, he did.

[Mohan] Nalini [Nalini] No, that's your child.

[Nalini laughs] [gasps]

[Nalini yells] Mohan! [crowd gasps]

[Nalini] A party? Oh, shit.

[Oliver] Uh... nothin', babe. I'm so sorry.

[pan clatters] Oops! Dropped my pan.

[phone dings] ...who, five minutes ago,

[scoffs] So, is it nice over at Ben's?

[scoffs] Oh, okay. Look,

[screams] [shatters]

[sighs] [man] See you guys later.

[sighs] Fine. Let's just take the photo. Go.

[sighs] Princeton. I will bring it up to god personally.

[siren wailing] ♪ 'Cause the floor is watching you ♪

[somber music playing] Devi was devastated,

[stammers] Today? Yeah.

[thuds to floor] Aside from her friends,

[tires screeching] This is not how you treat a Porsche.

[Trent] Lil' D! That's me.

[Trent] No, I know. [Paxton] No, you think...

[truck honking] Holy shit. We're gonna die!

[upbeat music plays] [in video] Point to Mr. McEnroe.

♪ I should have fought them ♪ ♪ I will defeat ♪

♪ I should have fought them ♪ ♪ Your heart won ♪

♪ Is it over ♪ [sniffs]

♪ My heart is armed and dangerous ♪ ♪ Armed and dangerous ♪

♪ We want everything... ♪ [girls giggling]

A million. Exactly.

A Muslim. [Kamala gasps]

After all, the beaver is... [together] Nature's engineer.

and Devi back on her feet. Thank you.

and I can't make it down there in time. Huh?

And I thought maybe I think you have the wrong idea about me.

and look at the fun they have. [sighs]

And since you've met Rebecca Paxton, I can't.

And there it is. Yeah. Who are you here with?

And what do we do? Model UN!

are too embarrassed to wear shorts. No, that's not it.

Are you guys ready? 'Cause I'm ready. [Paxton] Prove it. Go ahead.

Are you okay? [grunts] Okay, okay, okay, yeah.

Are you ready to head home? Yeah.

At night? At night?

because I Can I move in with you?

Because who are we? Sherman Oaks High!

Boo. That doesn't mean anything.

but I really [Fabiola] Yeah, you have.

but not in the way you think I did. Don't even try.

but they're all hot. Cool.

Cheeto, Eleanor? Thank you, Devi.

Cool. Get in. Okay.

Cool. I'll be in your group too. [Paxton] Cool.

Coyote girl! Whoo!

Dad? Come, come. Sit down.

Dammit! It'll make sense later, I promise.

Damn, girl. Savage burn. Thanks.

Devi, do you know what this is? A tomato.

Devi, listen to me. No, I don't want to.

Devi? Hi, Ms. Wong.

Did I just hit you? It's cool.

Do you want a drink? Oh, yeah.

Eleanor, you told her? No, I swear.

Everyone having fun at my slumber party? Absolutely.

Fabiola, let's just go. Come on. No!

find my key Just be cool, man.

First door on the right. Thanks.

gay. What?

Get the hell out of here. Mom!

Give it to Pandit Raj. [Pandit] Nalini.

Goddamn it, Eric! [Eric] What?

Good morning. Morning.

Have you heard from your mom? No.

He was less than two feet away, but [teacher] Devi.

He'll shit himself. Oh, yeah.

He's ashamed of you. I don't know if you'd call it ashamed.

He's so successful, he has his own Tesla. [car beeps]

Hello, Devi. Jesus! Kamala, what the hell?

Hello, Kamala. Oh, my God. Steve?

Hey, Patty. Oh! Yes, my sweet prince.

Hey, you're all over Instagram right now. What do you mean?

Hey. Hi.

Hi. Hi, Kamala.

Honestly You don't have to give me

How did you know that I had a boyfriend? It's pretty obvious.

I actually know who you are. You do?

I am not. Yeah, you are.

I can take it to your room, Kamala. Thank you, Devi.

I can't believe I just did that. Yeah.

I do. Then drive faster, bro!

I don't think that's true. That is true.

I kiss a lot of girls. Yeah, but most of them suck.

I knew you would be Fabiola...

I know. I'm a loser. Oh, you think you're a loser?

I need to go to my room. [Nalini] Devi...

I totally forgot why we were here. Oh!

I will. Good girl.

I'll see you later, mi amor. Okay.

I'm concerned. Yeah, me too.

I'm gonna cry. Right.

I'm gonna eat somewhere else. Please go.

I'm gonna go. Mmm.

I'm in. Yes!

I'm parked around the block. You're what?

I'm sorry. You're gonna have to do better than that.

Is it from... him? [giggles] Ooh...

It took a long time, and We're good.

It's always the short ones. [Fabiola] What?

It's fine. Fine?

It's racist, and offensive, and What?

It's totally normal. I know, right?

Jeez. Sorry. [door opens]

****? Yes, exactly. Your words.

Let's call her. Yeah.

Let's just wait it out in here. [glass bottles clinks]

Love you. [Ben's dad] Bye, bye.

meat lover's omelet. Thank you, Patty.

Mmm. [forced chuckle]

Nalini. Yes?

Namaste, Pandit Raj. Hello, Pandit ji

No what? [McEnroe] Devi was panicking.

No laughing. Mom!

No, but... That tool!

No, I didn't say that. Okay.

No, Paxton. You don't understand No, you know what?

No, that's okay. I trust you. You shouldn't.

No. No.

No. No.

No. What?

No. Yep. I know the whole roof by touch.

No. Yes. It was messed up.

Now I'm curious. Can I go see? No!

Now is not a good time! But it's really important.

Oh, God. [door closes]

Oh, I know Luke. He's a great guy. Shut up.

Oh, my God. [girl] What is it?

Oh, my God. Her life is like a movie. Oh, my God. [exhales]

Oh, my goodness! How wonderful! [Mr. Schleicher] Yeah.

Oh, no. What?

Oh, thank you so much! Yeah.

Oh, this is not a breakup. You know what?

Okay. [speaks indistinctly]

Okay. Good idea, Trent. Thank you.

Okay. Just relax. I am relaxed.

Ooh. Aah!

Ow. No, no, it's okay.

Ow. Goddamn it! Oh, shit. Are you okay?

Penis. Foot.

Really? Yeah.

Right? Ooh.

She is on a cruise. I know.

She's on keto diet and Just take it.

She's trying to emancipate herself. Ooh, like a child actor? Chic.

Shut up, Ben! Ow.

Shut up. Whoa.

So many topless women. [laughs]

So, she's got a lot on her plate. Hmm.

Stop. [Eleanor] Well, I know I did a good job.

Tater tot nachos. Hup up up.

Thank you so much, Mr. McEnroe. No problem, kid.

Thank you. But it is such a shame, you know?

That usually calms her down. Uh...

That's a werewolf, dude. Oh, yeah. [chuckles]

That's how she says. I do eat eggs.

That's why I asked her. [Trent] Sweet.

The B stands for Bunkr. Nice.

The janitor said No. Just, no.

There you go. Yes! [camera clicks]

This feels like a trap. It is.

Those aren't things. I'm just saying.

Trent put his balls in I don't care.

Two Mercedes? Lucky.

Ugh! [laughs] Suck it, Gomez.

Uh, cause he scared the crap out of me. [chuckles]

Uh, thanks. I don't want to presume it's a happy one.

Wait. You're moving back to India? Yeah, we have to.

We call them house managers now. Okay, okay. Sorry.

We should sit with her. Mm mm.

Welcome to out house. Wow, it's beautiful.

Well [scoffs] I wasn't. Yeah, you were. You were staring at me.

Well, I Smile.

Well, she keeps me on my toes too. [chuckles]

What I wasn't stirring... staring. Then what were you doing?

What What's happening? Just do it. It's cute.

What if I'm the right direction? You're not.

What is douche? OK, everyone stop talking about douche.

What the hell? [Devi screams]

What? Come on, my love.

What? My mom won't buy them for me.

What? She said she's giving up acting forever.

What? She's applying to fashion school,

What? Mom, I'm fast asleep! [book thuds on floor]

What? Why would that make him pissed? It doesn't matter.

Who are they? Zayn and Gigi.

Whoa. Auntie, you must calm down.

Whoa. He loaded. Yes, he is.

Whoa. Were you just trying to kiss me? Uh...

Why didn't I think of that? I know.

Why would you [door slams]

Word. Yeah.

Wow. [chuckles]

Yeah, definitely. You have to wear it 24/7.

Yeah, I'm definitely gonna go. Oh, come on, man.

Yeah, right. [Eleanor] It's true.

Yeah. [sighs with relief]

Yeah. Devi, I can't do that.

Yeah. So you can switch back to French?

Yes, and it hurts! Stop pinching me. Okay.

You are worth the $40. Please stop calling.

You can scroll. I'm not gonna scroll.

You guys didn't have to do that. Yes, we did.

You have to have a party. No, I don't think so.

You just weren't responding to texts. Don't go, Paxton.

You know, he's your only son. [Ben's dad] That's why he's my favorite.

You see Devi anywhere? I do not.

You think so? Definitely.

You're glowing. No, um...

...a sudden maturing in certain areas of her body...

...and hearing her mother say the thing she most longed for.

...dandruff shampoo.

...Devi was all American.

...that I'm gay.

...unexpected overtures from certain people at school...

...where she instantly got hit in the face with a lanyard.

'Cause earlier you called me Lil' D?

'Cause I push her intellectually, and her hotness elevates me socially.

'cause nobody eats meat there.

'cause one sip makes you demented.

'Cause that's its own identity. It's just a shitty one.

'Cause there's mad roaches in this school.

'Cause these clothes are sick.

'Cause, like, we're not really friends with you.

'Cause, you know, there are Muslim Indians, Sikh Indians, Jains, and

'Sup, FDR? [laughs]

'Sup, people? Who wants some 'za?

"'I love you right up to the moon,' he said."

"Ben Gross aced a math test. Ben Gross aced a history test.

"Bunkr. Just open up the app by clicking on the icon.

"Damn" is right, Devi. This is some really heavy stuff.

"I do eat eggs. I do eat eggs."

"I don't wanna fight anymore.

"My Darling Eleanor..."

"No cocaine for me, thanks. I'm good."

"To drink alcohol"?

"To try opioids"?

"Why do I think it's so weird and embarrassing to be Indian?"

"Why is Andy Samberg narrating the story of this particular boy?"

[ "Love Is A Phase" by De Lux playing]

["All Yours" by Widowspeak playing]

["Armed And Dangerous" by Chaos Chaos playing]

["Beautiful Day" by U2 playing on car stereo]

["Beautiful Day" by U2 plays on speaker]

["Boys Like You" by Kids At Midnight playing]

["Come And Go" by Brighter Later playing]

["Composure" by Argonaut & Wasp playing]

["Dancing (Downtown)" by Yacht playing]

["Dancing On My Own" by Robyn playing]

["Dancing On The Limit" by Prizes] playing

["Don't Stop Dreaming" by Celebration playing]

["Dum Maro Dum" playing]

["Fire For You" by Cannons playing]

["I Sink I Sink" by Living Hour playing]

["Mehndi Laga Ke Rakhna" playing]

["Moon Like Sour Candy" by The Ophelias playing]

["Nagada Sang Dhol Baje" playing]

["Peaches" by Milk & Bone and Alex Lustig playing]

["Playing Games" by Anna Of The North playing]

["So Strange" by Superhumanoids playing]

["Tease" by Salt Cathedral playing]

["Waking Up" by Sorry Girls playing]

[Alex] Hey, Fab.

[Alex] Hey, Fabiola.

[all laughing]

[angelic music playing]

[angrily] Devi, you are lying to your mother,

[announcer] Billy Crystal sharing nachos with his neighbor,

[Ararvind and Prashant clapping]

[Aravind laughs]

[Aravind] ...in the south San Jose area.

[Aravind] Devi. Hello?

[Aravind] What people don't realize

[audience member coughs]

[beer thuds to floor]

[Ben's dad grunting]

[Ben's dad] Fantastic. Sounds like we're in for a hell of a game, buddy.

[Ben's dad] Here's the birthday boy.

[Ben's dad] Hey, buddy. I'm so sorry. I don't think I'm gonna make it tonight.

[Ben's mom] I know, but it sounds like you have other children.

[Ben's mom] Oh, honey, don't lean back. That's not attractive.

[Ben] Born and raised. LOL.

[Ben] David S. Pumpkins and his Beat Boy Skeletons. LOL.

[Ben] Hey, can we please stop posting lame upvote thirsty memes

[Ben] Hey, Dad. All the blogs are saying that Kawhi's looking strong for tomorrow.

[Ben] Hey, David.

[Ben] Hey, Trent. Hey, Marcus.

[Ben] I know her. That's my housekeeper.

[Ben] I prefer to work alone.

[Ben] I'm there, dude. Let's get schwifty.

[Ben] Okay. That is not a teenager.

[Ben] Our app will help keep you safe from catastrophic bomb attacks.

[Ben] That sucks. Can you reschedule?

[Ben] What do you mean Eric's sick?

[Betty] I'm going to look for Jughead.

[blows loudly]

[blows loudly]

[book thuds onto floor]

[book thuds]

[both chuckle]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both scoff]

[both stammer] Boyfriends?

[both] Like an internship?

[boy] Meet me in the ice room. Da svidania, Russia.

[boy] Uh, obvi.

[brakes screeching]

[car starts]

[cars honking]

[cars honking]

[cars shifts into park]

[cell phone vibrating]

[chairman] Decorum!

[chanting in Sanskrit]

[chanting]

[chanting] World War III! World War III! World War III! World War III!

[chants in Sanskrit]

[chatter and drums in background]

[chatter over TV]

[chatter]

[chatter]

[cheering]

[chokes]

[chortling]

[chuckes] Yeah, I agree.

[chuckle]

[chuckles nervously]

[chuckles softly]

[chuckles softly]

[chuckles, whimpers]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles] But he is still a person with feelings and problems.

[chuckles] Forget it. I'm out.

[chuckles] It's brilliant.

[chuckles] It's so cultural.

[chuckles] Last Halloween, she did a couple's costume with a librarian.

[chuckles] Thanks. I'm not too worried though.

[chuckles] Uh...

[chuckles] We just became exclusive.

[chuckles] You were joking.

[class cheering]

[class gasps]

[class gasps]

[class starts to play]

[clears throat]

[clears throat]

[clicks tongue] for date nights.

[clock ticking]

[club music playing]

[continues chanting]

[coughing and wheezing]

[crowd cheering excitedly]

[crowd cheering on TV]

[crunches]

[crying] No, no. Don't apologize.

[crying] What's not fair

[dance music playing]

[dance music playing]

[Devi chuckles]

[Devi crying] Mom!

[Devi laughs]

[Devi scoffs]

[Devi screams hysterically]

[Devi screams]

[Devi] Ah! No!

[Devi] Because he sucks.

[Devi] Damn it, Kamala.

[Devi] Fab, are you paying attention?

[Devi] Hey, guys.

[Devi] Hey.

[Devi] I hate you!

[Devi] I love Mrs. Finch, but can someone else go work on her feet?

[Devi] It was bad.

[Devi] Just had to do one quick thing. It's super important.

[Devi] Just sex.

[Devi] Mom, Mom, guess what we found?

[Devi] My problems?

[Devi] Oh, my God!

[Devi] Oh, my God. It never touched the ground!

[Devi] Please wait. I'm on my way to you.

[Devi] Shit! My mom's car is gone.

[Devi] So you never have to accept food from a pedo again.

[Devi] That's not my problem!

[Devi] What are you doing here, Aravind Periyappa?

[Devi] Wow.

[door closes]

[door closes]

[door opens]

[door opens]

[door opens]

[door opens]

[door opens] Come on!

[door slams shut]

[door slams]

[door slams]

[door slams]

[door slams]

[door slams]

[doorbell rings]

[Dr. Ryan] Hmm?

[Dr. Ryan] Okay. Here you go.

[dramatic music playing]

[dramatic music playing]

[dramatic music playing]

[dramatic upbeat music playing]

[dramatically] My grandmother died in this dress.

[dreamy music playing]

[EDM music playing]

[Eleanor] No, I have to check it out.

[Eleanor] Proud of you for boning Paxton!

[Eleanor] So what's this about?

[Elise] Excuse me?

[emotional music continues]

[emotional music playing]

[engine starts]

[Eric] Mr. Chan, I can't play like this!

[exhales deeply]

[exhales deeply]

[exhales heavily]

[exhales sharply]

[exhales sharply]

[exhales sharply]

[exhales]

[exhales]

[exhales]

[exhales]

[exhales] Whoa.

[exhales] Why are you asking me? I don't know anything about boyfriends.

[exhaling deeply]

[exhaling deeply]

[Fabiola] Are you coming to the drama room?

[Fabiola] Devi, help. We got a situation.

[Fabiola] Hey, don't be rude to Jonah.

[Fabiola] Oh, my God!

[Fabiola] Where are you? Why aren't you calling us back?

[Fabiola] You're at Paxton's house?

[footsteps approaching and receding]

[forcefully exhales]

[funky music playing]

[gasp softly] Oh, god.

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps] Mom, you made it!

[gasps] Oh, man. She's gonna freak.

[gasps] Oh, which reminds me,

[gasps] What about you and Jonah? Did you ask him out yet?

[gavel banging] Decorum. That's not what we do in Security Council.

[Gears Brosnan] Go, Devi.

[Gears Brosnan] Hello. How are you?

[Gears Brosnan] I'm gay.

[gentle music playing]

[giggles]

[girl] Delegates,

[girl] Devi, be careful.

[girl] Good morning!

[girl] That makes sense.

[girls chuckle]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[harp music playing]

[hesitantly] Hi.

[hip hop music playing]

[hip hop song playing]

[hits gavel]

[hits gavel] United States, you do not have the floor.

[imitating Porky Pig] That's all folks!

[in Chinese] Over my dead body.

[in Chinese] Thank you.

[in lower voice] "Hey, you're Devi, right?

[in Southern accent] That's right. Go to the movies. Go.

[indie music playing loudly]

[inhales deeply]

[inhales deeply]

[inhales deeply]

[inhales deeply]

[inhales deeply] spell it out.

[inhales]

[inhales]

[inhales]

[inhales] And I gotta say, you sort of blindsided me here.

[inhaling deeply]

[Joyce] Eh, eh, eh.

[Joyce] I wanted more than anything

[Kamala] Oh, Betty.

[Kamala] Oh, look, an open table.

[Kamala] Prashant...

[Kamala] Wait. Is this also a murder mystery?

[kissing]

[knock at door]

[knocking on door]

[knocking on door]

[knocking on door]

[laughing]

[laughing]

[laughing] Okay, Big Little Lies.

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs] Don't miss.

[laughs] Good work, Kamala.

[laughs] Here is Kamala.

[laughs] In your face.

[laughs] No.

[laughs] Okay.

[laughs] She's joking.

[laughs] Steve, why don't you go downstairs and get a snack?

[laughs] Well, that is very clear.

[laughs] Wow. She must be desperate to get out of her house.

[laughs] Wow. Thank you.

[laughs] Yes. What is that about?

[laughs] Yo, that slogan sucks.

[laughs] You're not just going on vacation to India, young lady.

[light guitar music playing]

[light rock music playing]

[locker shuts]

[locker shuts]

[loud crash]

[low murmuring]

[male voice] Come on, dude. Give me a turn.

[male voice] Devi.

[man] Somebody's home late.

[man] This is Ben Gross.

[Marcus] Yeah, bro. He never talks to us.

[McEnroe screaming] Wait! Hey!

[McEnroe] After coming out to Eleanor,

[McEnroe] After dropping that bomb,

[McEnroe] And just like that,

[McEnroe] And then four seconds later, this:

[McEnroe] And there it was, the truth.

[McEnroe] Apparently, what happens  in Davis does not stay in Davis.

[McEnroe] As a scientist, Fabiola was used to a clear cut, data driven life.

[McEnroe] As Devi walked into school for the first time,

[McEnroe] As the aunties praised her, Kamala had a sinking feeling.

[McEnroe] At lunch, Devi beelined it to where she knew Paxton would be,

[McEnroe] Aunties are older Indian women who have no blood relationship to you,

[McEnroe] Because they were already mad at her,

[McEnroe] Being inside Paxton's garage

[McEnroe] Ben’s parents were surprisingly cool about letting Devi move in.

[McEnroe] Bingo! White guy. College counselor Ron.

[McEnroe] But as you can see, she had a plan.

[McEnroe] But even the calculator died of boredom.

[McEnroe] But she wouldn't have to go through it alone.

[McEnroe] Come on, Fabiola. You can do this. Just one more word.

[McEnroe] Currently, she stars  in Thoroughly Modern Millie

[McEnroe] Damn, Devi. Preethi's sister really schooled you. Read the room.

[McEnroe] Damn, Pandit Raj. That's spooky as hell. You're good.

[McEnroe] Devi and Ben only had 15 minutes.

[McEnroe] Devi couldn't believe it.

[McEnroe] Devi couldn't believe that the major trauma of her life

[McEnroe] Devi didn't consider herself a particularly spiritual person,

[McEnroe] Devi felt bad for her cousin.

[McEnroe] Devi felt excited about going to the party of the year.

[McEnroe] Devi felt relieved.

[McEnroe] Devi felt surprisingly honored,

[McEnroe] Devi had bought herself two hours at Ben's party.

[McEnroe] Devi had hoped she'd slept that memory off, but there it was again.

[McEnroe] Devi had hoped that kissing Paxton wasn’t a one time thing,

[McEnroe] Devi had prepared all she could,

[McEnroe] Devi has, what you might consider, a short fuse,

[McEnroe] Devi mistaking her uncle for her dad

[McEnroe] Devi realized for the first time

[McEnroe] Devi still had not told her friends the truth about Paxton.

[McEnroe] Devi strode off,

[McEnroe] Devi thought to herself:

[McEnroe] Devi told her friends about her interaction with Paxton,

[McEnroe] Devi was feeling pretty proud of herself.

[McEnroe] Devi was panicking and pretty bad at coming up with excuses.

[McEnroe] Devi was rattled.

[McEnroe] Devi went to bed happy that night.

[McEnroe] Devi worshipped her father.

[McEnroe] Did he just say she looked good?

[McEnroe] Drunk and rude,

[McEnroe] Eleanor had caught the drama bug from her mother,

[McEnroe] Even though Devi was Indian,

[McEnroe] Even though her family had a nice time at Ganesh Puja,

[McEnroe] Even though Nalini was talking out of frustration

[McEnroe] For the first time,

[McEnroe] Great segue, Devi. Effortless.

[McEnroe] He died.

[McEnroe] He's talking about this:

[McEnroe] Her plan worked pretty well for a few days.

[McEnroe] Hey, I don't know what any of this means.

[McEnroe] Hey, it’s your boy McEnroe again.

[McEnroe] Hey, look at that! It's me.

[McEnroe] Hey, this is kind of a breakthrough.

[McEnroe] Hey, this was really uncomfortable for me to watch.

[McEnroe] Holy shit! Did Paxton H Y just give her a nickname?

[McEnroe] I know yielding to the chair doesn’t sound exciting

[McEnroe] I like Pandit Raj. He's got a good energy.

[McEnroe] It had been a week since Devi's violent encounter

[McEnroe] Just then, the high school gods chose to smile down on Devi.

[McEnroe] Kamala was expected to have an arranged marriage

[McEnroe] Let's see. Paxton's emergency was a fun photo shoot,

[McEnroe] Looking on at this gorgeous maternal scene,

[McEnroe] Looks like an ad for India, right?

[McEnroe] Looks like it's gonna be a long night.

[McEnroe] Maybe correcting these girls could wait.

[McEnroe] Meanwhile, Kamala knew what exactly she was praying for.

[McEnroe] Nalini was a little on edge.

[McEnroe] No, it's not, Ira.

[McEnroe] Not the last time she's gonna be saying that.

[McEnroe] Oh, God.

[McEnroe] Oh, shit. Apparently, Mr. Shapiro asked Devi a question.

[McEnroe] Oh, that dress?

[McEnroe] Okay, keep it together, Devi.

[McEnroe] Paxton, these are very unforced errors.

[McEnroe] Praying had always been hard for Devi.

[McEnroe] Real convincing, Devi.

[McEnroe] She was so rattled by it,

[McEnroe] Shit! Maybe it's Paxton, or Fabiola trying to apologize.

[McEnroe] So the next morning, Devi took her dad's advice

[McEnroe] That's Devi's cousin, Kamala.

[McEnroe] That's why she wanted to post this thirst trap in the first place...

[McEnroe] The coyote may not have been her dad

[McEnroe] The day after the hottest guy in school calls you out

[McEnroe] The day had been a long one for Nalini,

[McEnroe] The day was an epic fail.

[McEnroe] The day was turning around. Forget those pesky flashbacks.

[McEnroe] The truth is, Paxton and Devi were kind of nothing at the moment.

[McEnroe] They're all Hufflepuff.

[McEnroe] This disgusted reaction belongs to Ben Gross, Devi's nemesis.

[McEnroe] This is Doctor Jamie Ryan, a child psychologist

[McEnroe] This is Pandit Rajakrishnan,

[McEnroe] This was her chance to make good on her promise

[McEnroe] To an average teen,

[McEnroe] To the untrained eye,

[McEnroe] Wait. Was this it?

[McEnroe] Well, this certainly was not the walk of shame Devi was hoping for.

[McEnroe] What made Devi most sad

[McEnroe] What the hell was this?

[McEnroe] What? That actually worked?

[McEnroe] What? What the hell just happened?

[McEnroe] When you're a normal person

[McEnroe] While Devi may have become persona non grata at home,

[McEnroe] While most of her classmates partied the night away at Ben's,

[McEnroe] Whoa, Paxton speaks Japanese?

[McEnroe] Whoa! It's me. Small world.

[McEnroe] Whoa. Had he seen her sexy dance video and changed his mind?

[McEnroe] Wow, I look great there.

[McEnroe] Yeah, of course it was a dream, people.

[McEnroe] Yeah, she did.

[McEnroe] Years ago, Ben and Devi split all extracurriculars down the middle,

[McEnroe] You see, ten years ago,

[McEnroe] You'll get 'em next time, Fabiola.

[mimics bomb exploding]

[Mohan] Ah!

[Mohan] Come. Let's go inside and show this to your mom.

[Mohan] No, you don't. Come here.

[Mohan] See, this is an instrument for a real musician.

[mouths] What the shit?

[Mr. Schleicher] Amazing, Eleanor. Better than Katharine Hepburn.

[Mr. Schleicher] Okay, Tom, take it from your line.

[Mr. Shapiro] All right, everybody.

[Mr. Shapiro] Hi, Debra. I'm on, and I'm gonna loop in our therapist.

[Mr. Shapiro] Okay. Who doesn't have a group yet?

[Mr. Shapiro] That's right, Ben. Good work.

[Ms. Wong] Devi, thank you again for letting us borrow your kitchen,

[mumbles] Let's go, Clippers.

[mumbling]

[music builds]

[music builds]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[music fades]

[music fades]

[music stops]

[music stops]

[musical instruments playing discordantly]

[Nalini and Mohan laugh]

[Nalini gasps]

[Nalini gasps] Devi,

[Nalini laughs] No!

[Nalini speaks Tamil]

[Nalini] All I'm saying is

[Nalini] Devi, are you still praying? Our gods have other stuff to do, you know?

[Nalini] Devi, let's go! Traffic is heavier than usual!

[Nalini] He's going through a hard time with his family and girlfriend,

[Nalini] Hello, everyone.

[Nalini] How can you be so rude to that boy?

[Nalini] Is that John McEnroe?

[Nalini] It flew away?

[Nalini] It's ticking.

[Nalini] Just a reminder, you need to come home straight after school.

[Nalini] Oh, Swarovski crystals.

[Nalini] Out of be right now and put on something nice.

[Nalini] Princeton!

[Nalini] Somebody call 9 1 1!

[Nalini] That young man is a human being, and he's very sad.

[Nalini] This can't keep happening.

[Nalini] You are too easy on her.

[Nalini] You complain you want your friends to come over more.

[Nalini] You should've thought about your Bagel Bites

[Nalini] Your three minutes are up!

[narrator] As she said, this is Devi Vishwakumar.

[nervously] Fabiola knows.

[nervously] Hey, Jonah.

[nervously] Hi.

[Oliver] 'Sup, Devi? You just missed our pre game.

[over TV] ...I am glad that you're safe,

[over TV] Answer my question! The question, jerk!

[Pandit] Come forward.

[Pandit] This is very kind of you.

[Pandit] Wonderful.

[pants]

[Patty] Devi, you have a visitor.

[Paxton] All right. Trent thinks he can eat an

[Paxton] Devi, WTF?

[Paxton] Just sex, right?

[Paxton] Phil!

[Paxton] Whoa.

[Paxton] You've met my dad like 40 times, Trent.

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzing]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[phone dings]

[phone dings]

[phone dings]

[phone dings]

[phone ringing]

[photographer] Don't need the hands in the face.

[playing continues]

[playing song]

[pleasant music playing]

[pop music playing]

[Prashant] Are you okay, Devi?

[Prashant] So, Uncle, you're a security system...

[principal] Look who it is. Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Idiot.

[quietly] Yeah, well, I wish the Nazis would kill you, so...

[Rebecca] Nice to meet you.

[Rebecca] Stop.

[recites blessing in Sanskrit]

[Rick] Hey, aren't you on the Rick and Morty subreddit?

[Rick] LMAO. Same.

[Rick] That's the problem when subs get too big.

[robot] Hello, Fabiola.

[rock music playing]

[romantic music playing]

[romantic music playing]

[sad music playing]

[sad music playing]

[Samberg] After a pretty bleak 24 hours,

[Samberg] Although on the surface it didn't seem like much had changed,

[Samberg] As friends go, up through middle school,

[Samberg] As he stood in his sworn enemy's kitchen

[Samberg] Ben couldn't remember the last family dinner he'd had.

[Samberg] Ben entered North End Pizza excited at the prospect

[Samberg] Ben found himself strangely moved.

[Samberg] Ben guarded his sadness the same way I guard my Emmy award,

[Samberg] Ben was a resilient kid.

[Samberg] Ben's mom and dad had a very unique parenting style

[Samberg] Had Ben imagined the nice conversation they had last night?

[Samberg] If there had ever been a perfect opportunity to nuke Devi back,

[Samberg] In his dad's defense, Kanye's deal was complicated.

[Samberg] Instead, he decided to stand down.

[Samberg] Unfortunately, for Ben, however,

[Samberg] Unfortunately, Shira had gotten a text mid pop

[Samberg] Why wouldn't Devi want everyone to know

[Samberg] Yeah, that's not normal.

[Samberg] Yikes!

[sarcastically] Me? I'm cool. Cool as ice.

[sarcastically] Oh, I stand corrected. You're America's sweetheart.

[sarcastically] Okay. I'll just stay here and kill myself.

[sarcastically] Perfect stranger. How exciting.

[sarcastically] Thank you so much, Paxton, for clearing that up.

[sarcastically] Thank you. I'm sure your prayers did it.

[sarcastically] That's so cool.

[sarcastically] Where do I start?

[sarcastically] You're right. Our situations are so similar.

[school bell ringing]

[school bell rings]

[school bell rings]

[school bell rings]

[school bell rings]

[school bell rings]

[school bell rings]

[school bell rings]

[school bell rings]

[school bell rings]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs]

[scoffs] And you're not gonna regret quitting the play,

[scoffs] Are you suggesting an alliance between us?

[scoffs] I don't have my wallet.

[scoffs] I just ditched my friends for this.

[scoffs] No one.

[scoffs] Not before I'm out.

[scoffs] Okay. Paxton's not dumb.

[scoffs] Ouch, burn.

[scoffs] She's only hot from the boobs down...

[scoffs] What does that mean?

[scoffs] Yeah, sure. I was gonna say the same thing too.

[scoffs] You wish you were cool enough for intravenous drugs.

[scoffs] You're being dramatic. It's just a silly rumor.

[scoffs] You're one to talk.

[scooter thuds to floor]

[screaming] Mom! Wait!

[screams with joy]

[scribbling]

[scribbling]

[sentimental music continues]

[sentimental music playing]

[sentimental music playing]

[sentimental music playing]

[sentimental music playing]

[sentimental music playing]

[sentimental music playing]

[sentimental music playing]

[sentimental music playing]

[sharp exhale]

[Shira] #eyebrows #selfcare

[shrieks]

[sighs deeply]

[sighs deeply]

[sighs deeply] She's not coming, Kamala.

[sighs softly]

[sighs, sniffs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs] Anyway, Devi,

[sighs] Anyway, I think I'm going to head out.

[sighs] But yes, perhaps I should sell this bike.

[sighs] Bye, guys.

[sighs] Dammit!

[sighs] Good girl.

[sighs] He's the elephant god.

[sighs] Hmm.

[sighs] I don't even know why we have this stupid bike. It was Mohan's.

[sighs] I'm gay.

[sighs] I'm on it, Mom.

[sighs] My mom just came in here and was being all like,

[sighs] No.

[sighs] Okay, Devi. You can do this.

[sighs] Okay.

[sighs] Okay. Goodbye.

[sighs] That

[sighs] Try something girly, like a flower or a cute bird.

[sighs] Wait, Kamala, this is crazy.

[sighs] Yes.

[singing "Happy Birthday" in Spanish]

[siren blares]

[sirens continue]

[slow music playing]

[slow music playing]

[smacks lips] and Ourselves.

[sniffles]

[sniffs]

[sniffs]

[softly] Hmm, bet you could pick me up and throw me.

[song continues]

[song continues]

[song continues]

[song ends]

[song ends]

[song fades]

[song stops]

[speaks Japanese]

[spits]

[squeals and cheers]

[squeals]

[stammers] A bird hit it.

[stammers] h having sex with me?

[stammers] I am not disappointed.

[stammers] I don't even know why I cried. Uh...

[stammers] I don't think so, Russia.

[stammers] Let me just say this.

[stammers] No, ew. He didn't. Not even close.

[stammers] No, I mean, you died.

[stammers] Oh, well, I really am into

[stammers] Somebody call an ambulance. An ambulance, please!

[stammers] Uh... I think so.

[stammers] Yeah, no. Alex Gomez.

[stammers] You can't just start a rumor about someone's mom like that.

[Steve] What if this guy sweeps you off your feet?

[Steve] Why can't you just leave?

[students chattering]

[swallows]

[teacher] Devi, Ben. Can you come back in here, please?

[teacher] Guess what, guys? You're in luck.

[teacher] Quiet please. No one should be boiling over

[teacher] Thank you.

[tense music playing]

[thuds into floor]

[Tom] I'm going to the movies.

[trash can thuds]

[Trent] I thought that was your neighbor.

[Trent] That bouncing's mad hypnotic, yo.

[Trent] That is the question.

[Trent] That was weird, right?

[tuning harp]

[tuning harp]

[typing]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat techno music playing]

[video game chatter]

[voice breaking]

[voice breaks] I'm fine. Uh...

[voicemail beeps]

[voicemail] It's Devi. Leave a message.

[voicemail] This is Paxton. I don't check my voicemail.

[voicemail] This is Paxton. I don't check my voicemail.

[western music playing]

[western music plays]

[whimpers]

[whimsical music playing]

[whispering] He doesn't know he's a robot.

[whispering] I obviously need to talk to my cousin!

[whispering] What's wrong with you? You're acting so strange.

[whispers] And there's one more where that came from.

[whispers] At the nearest wine bar.

[whispers] He's human.

[whispers] They used to be lovers.

[whispers] Why did you do that, Mother?

[whispers] Yes.

[whooping continues]

[winces]

[winces]

[woman sighs]

[woman] What a miracle.

[yells] Jesus Christ!

[yipping, whooping]

[Zoe] Yes.

#thefutureisfemale

♪ ...laugh all the way ♪

♪ ...think of reality ♪

♪ 'Cause I answer them Before boys like you ♪

♪ 'Cause I answer them Before boys like you ♪

♪ 'Cause I answer them Before boys like you ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm not looking for love ♪

♪ 'Cause this will be the last one... ♪

♪ A tie dye shirt and too much jewelry ♪

♪ Ah, ah... ♪

♪ All I know is what I want ♪

♪ All I know is what I want ♪

♪ All is healed ♪

♪ All my life, I've been hiding myself ♪

♪ All my life, I've been hiding myself ♪

♪ All my life, I've been hiding myself ♪

♪ All over ♪

♪ All over again ♪

♪ All the memories away ♪

♪ Always I ♪

♪ And even though I've given up ♪

♪ And it feels like forever... ♪

♪ And soon ♪

♪ And when you show ♪

♪ Anyway you stack it up... ♪

♪ Are made of the same stuff The fire we're made of ♪

♪ As I'm a tough one ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪ Beautiful day... ♪

♪ Boys, boys, boys ♪

♪ Boys, boys, boys ♪

♪ But you brought in the cold ♪

♪ By the lovelight in my eyes ♪

♪ Check out the ammo Protect the arsenal ♪

♪ Cigarettes on the dresser ♪

♪ Come closer ♪

♪ Count the ways ♪

♪ Crying ♪

♪ Dancing ♪

♪ Doing it ♪

♪ Don't know the difference Between right and wrong ♪

♪ Don't stop dreaming ♪

♪ Don't stop dreaming ♪

♪ Don't worry about it, I am trying ♪

♪ Don't you stop dreaming ♪

♪ Down to the ground ♪

♪ Down to the root of everything ♪

♪ Down to where it all went wrong ♪

♪ Down, down ♪

♪ Down, down ♪

♪ Down, down to the ground ♪

♪ Dream about ♪

♪ Dream about ♪

♪ Dressing up for the party ♪

♪ Drive so ♪

♪ Enough as the cows Come drink me all out ♪

♪ Everybody tryna buy my style for what ♪

♪ Finna to pump it up Get the party jumpin' up ♪

♪ Fly ♪

♪ For a while ♪

♪ For kicks and for pleasure... ♪

♪ Forever till we die ♪

♪ Get drunk on my wine ♪

♪ God ♪

♪ Got my belt on tight And the feeling's right ♪

♪ Happy birth  ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ How could you not know? ♪

♪ How could you not know... ♪

♪ Huh? Who’s gonna stop me?

♪ Huh? Who’s gonna stop me? ♪

♪ I could have died for you ♪

♪ I could have died for you ♪

♪ I did not It was armor I had ♪

♪ I did not know ♪

♪ I don't care, I wanna feel it all ♪

♪ I don’t really know Why you gassin’ her up ♪

♪ I see you move ♪

♪ I sink, I sink... ♪

♪ I still remember The look on her face... ♪

♪ I stopped looking... ♪

♪ I used to imagine ♪

♪ I wanna send it all crashing down ♪

♪ I was alive with you ♪

♪ I was on fire for you ♪

♪ I was on fire for you ♪

♪ I wasn't looking for love ♪

♪ I will never love a boy like you ♪

♪ I will never love a boy like you ♪

♪ I'll never let you go ♪

♪ I'll never let you go ♪

♪ I'll never let you go... ♪

♪ I'll never love again ♪

♪ I'm the one that holds you ♪

♪ I'm the one that holds you ♪

♪ I'm the one that holds you ♪

♪ I've been playing games With your heart ♪

♪ I've been playing games With your heart ♪

♪ I've been playing games With your heart ♪

♪ I've been playing games With your heart ♪

♪ I've been playing games With your heart ♪

♪ I've got to give ♪

♪ I've had enough of all these bitches ♪

♪ If it's hurting, hurting, hurting ♪

♪ If it's hurting, hurting, hurting ♪

♪ If you beefin' You better squash that like butternut... ♪

♪ If you want to dance Let it take precedence ♪

♪ In the middle night ♪

♪ In the middle of the night ♪

♪ In your mouth... ♪

♪ Is it over... ♪

♪ It was a beautiful day... ♪

♪ It's a beautiful day ♪

♪ It's a little fuzzy But I think I can make it out... ♪

♪ Juliana's sleeping ♪

♪ Just don't make a... ♪

♪ Just moving in the dark ♪

♪ Just to make you feel unsure ♪

♪ Just waiting for a boy like you ♪

♪ Just waiting for a boy like you ♪

♪ Just waiting for a boy like you ♪

♪ Left you thinking in the dark ♪

♪ Lemonade and Fuzzy Peaches ♪

♪ Let's pack a bag and never come back ♪

♪ Looking like a million bucks ♪

♪ Make me cry ♪

♪ Maybe I'm waking up ♪

♪ Maybe, baby Maybe, baby ♪

♪ Maybe, baby Maybe, baby ♪

♪ Moon like sour candy... ♪

♪ My heart is armed and dangerous ♪

♪ My heart just dropped ♪

♪ Never come back ♪

♪ Never come back ♪

♪ Never come back ♪

♪ Never come back ♪

♪ Never come back ♪

♪ Never come back ♪

♪ Never come back ♪

♪ Never come back ♪

♪ No person can tell Where it came from, what it means... ♪

♪ No space to rent in this town ♪

♪ No, I'm not looking for love ♪

♪ No, I'm not looking for love tonight ♪

♪ No, I'm not looking for love tonight ♪

♪ No, I'm not looking for love tonight ♪

♪ Not answering questions in math class ♪

♪ Not answering questions in math class ♪

♪ Not answering questions in math class ♪

♪ Not likely ♪

♪ Now that I'm lost ♪

♪ Now you know ♪

♪ Now you know ♪

♪ Now you know ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Oh, my God ♪

♪ Oh, my God ♪

♪ Oh... ♪

♪ Only with your permission... ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Or are we finally coming alive ♪

♪ Or are we finally... ♪

♪ Over stupid words from boys like you ♪

♪ Over stupid words from boys like you ♪

♪ Over stupid words from boys like you ♪

♪ Pleasure ♪

♪ Pretty face, can you do it? ♪

♪ Promise myself When I'm older and brave ♪

♪ Promise myself When I'm older and brave ♪

♪ Reach out to your mother, I am crying ♪

♪ Remove your armor ♪

♪ Remove your armor ♪

♪ Rewind Gotta play the replay in my mind ♪

♪ Rosy cheeks and pockets full of dreams ♪

♪ Running home from the bus stop crying ♪

♪ Running home from the bus stop crying ♪

♪ Running home from the bus stop crying ♪

♪ See my fit, it’s a fit Yeah, I’m fit, take a flick ♪

♪ See my fit, it’s a fit Yeah, I’m fit, take a flick ♪

♪ See my fit, it’s a fit, it’s a fit ♪

♪ See my fit, it’s a fit, it’s a fit ♪

♪ Shoots up through the stony ground ♪

♪ Sip a little bit When I'm finished, give me another one ♪

♪ So it's time we take ♪

♪ Starting to regret you ♪

♪ Takin' shots to the head Like an uppercut ♪

♪ The beast within ♪

♪ The days to come ♪

♪ The end I'd find ♪

♪ The shapes you pose ♪

♪ The sky is open, my stomach sunk ♪

♪ The waves come crashing... ♪

♪ Then I know you want me more ♪

♪ Then it's working, working, working ♪

♪ Then it's working, working, working ♪

♪ There are leaves ♪

♪ There's no need to hide  ♪

♪ There's no need to hide  ♪

♪ There's no need to hide  ♪

♪ There's no need to hide  ♪

♪ There's no room ♪

♪ Think of this ♪

♪ Thinking about you ♪

♪ This is the last day... ♪

♪ This is the last one ♪

♪ This is the last one ♪

♪ Tide, tide turning ♪

♪ To see ♪

♪ To see the ways that I’ve been blinded ♪

♪ To take you out of this place ♪

♪ Tongue like bubbles floating Down my rotten skin ♪

♪ Turn around, cause you're pretty And I like that ♪

♪ Wanna walk right up to you ♪

♪ Was I being lied to? ♪

♪ We break hearts like bones And take the Tyrone ♪

♪ We get off, I get on ♪

♪ We get off, we get back on... ♪

♪ We're gonna move, take over ♪

♪ We're never in love ♪

♪ We've got it made ♪

♪ Wearing corduroy For four days straight ♪

♪ Welcome to your pleasure ♪

♪ Well, baby, I’m waking up ♪

♪ What happens ♪

♪ When her fur is a faux And she don’t even know ♪

♪ When things would go wrong ♪

♪ Where did you go? ♪

♪ Where did you go? ♪

♪ Who you wanna be? ♪

♪ Who you wanna be? ♪

♪ Who’s gonna stop me? ♪

♪ Who’s gonna stop me? ♪

♪ Who’s gonna stop me? Copy ♪

♪ Who’s gonna stop me? Copy ♪

♪ Who’s gonna stop me? Watch me flex on ’em ♪

♪ Who’s gonna stop me? Watch me flex on ’em ♪

♪ Why I'd do this ♪

♪ Wish I'd never met you ♪

♪ Without you ♪

♪ Without you ♪

♪ Without you ♪

♪ Yeah, I’m fit, take a flick See my fit, it’s a fit, it’s a fit ♪

♪ Yeah, I’m fresh as fly as nobody ♪

♪ Yeah, I’m fresh as fly as nobody In this room here gon’ try it ♪

♪ Yeah, see my fit, it’s a fit ♪

♪ You ♪

♪ You can only like me when you're drunk ♪

♪ You thought you'd found a friend... ♪

♪ You'll be down ♪

♪ You'll be downtown ♪

♪The heart is a bloom ♪