A Series of Unfortunate Events (2017) - Season 3 Edit

A brave mother, and a loyal sibling.

A career in the circus,

A catchphrase should be cool and snappy,

A daring life of impulsive passion can lead to many things.

A face this gorgeous should never be hidden behind a mask.

A few ants, a magnifying glass.

A few witnesses have died, disappeared, or been carried off by eagles.

A fire, you say?

A fish bone? Are you trying to kill me?

A group of bank robbers took a few prisoners

A house inside a tree.

A kidnapping.

A little flicker of light,

A little song, a little dance,

A long fall in the dark...

A man with a beard but no hair.

A monologue from The Taming of Macbeth.

A pack of strange, green cigarettes just lying in the snow,

A person might survive if he was unable to sleep,

A pony party for me?

A runaway caravan plummeting down a mountain,

A troupe of Snow Scouts

A troupe of Snow Scouts

A water filtration system

A water filtration system. It wouldn't be hard.

A water what now?

A woman I will never share a root beer float or a horse costume with again.

A woman in your condition shouldn't be out here all alone.

A woman who, at that very moment, was running for her life

A word which here means "a catchy phrase,"

A word which here means "while the police gathered outside

According to the The Incomplete History of Secret Organizations,

After a storm, we collect everything that washes up and bring it to Ishmael.

After drinking nothing but coconut cordial?

After I've been crowned False Spring Queen!

After them!

After they walked away down Mount Fraught.

After tonight, countless orphans and their fortunes will be ours.

After we went to all that trouble to restrain their parents in Peru.

Ah! Salmon galore!

All of your extremely wealthy parents, although I am starting to suspect

All over the city?

All right. Wait.

All that I do know is that in this story...

All these items must have washed up on the seawall.

All turned to ash, so no one can read them.

All we need to do is scream and he'll come running.

Allow her to keep some moments to herself.

Allow me to offer a word of caution:

Along with my friends, my siblings, and the woman I loved.

Alonso, bring me the birdcage.

Although I can't imagine you having any interest in seeing big piles of money.

Although the very sight of them might make you scream other names.

Am going to change its name to the Olaf!

An aura of menace is a distinct feeling of evil

An empty house filled with empty cages

An enormous fortune I never really earned.

An expression to describe when captors grow fond of their prisoners.

An infant servant. I had one of those myself before the schism.

An invitation to share a story.

An underground organization needs a way to travel underground.

And a biter.

And a bunch of even more dangerous destinations!

And a life on the lam,

And a one, and a two,

And a possible survivor of the fire that destroyed their home,

And a root beer float.

And a three, four, five!

And a woman with hair but no beard. Count Olaf was afraid of them.

And all our stories end that way, too,

And all six inventing labs.

And all six inventing labs.

And as you can see, I'm very pregnant.

And at least several decades too old.

And Bertrand insisted we document it in this book."

And besides, you said you'd been there before.

And best of all, the Baudelaire fortune is in my hands,

And books to read.

And cook.

And countless consecutive and nonconsecutive days

And don't have any kids yourself.

And dressed to kill.

And each of them will be offered the exciting opportunity to join us.

And even a peewee level dropout can see that you're in no condition

And eventually managed to take the robbers to jail."

And every year, we celebrate False Spring at the top of Mount Fraught.

And extra masks.

And finally, we burned down the library.

And for a time we did, and then, well...

And frankly, so should you!

And glimpsed the crimes, follies, and misfortunes that would befall us,

And go where?

And go where?

And have salt to season your food.

And have to survive by eating dirt?

And helped him into a secret tunnel under the house

And hope to die.

And how do you plan to stop me?

And I am sorry to say that in the lives of the Baudelaire orphans,

And I am sure they're dead!

And I have had my self worth degraded,

And I have spent years, months,

And I hope that's true of Mr. Tamerlane.

And I pushed them!

And I spend my days drinking root beer floats alone

And I still got everything I wanted!

And I thought, what if a group of curious, capable young people came together

And I will unleash it on this island

And I'll be back with a new disguise. The best one yet!

And I'm right here...

And I'm still better off than you!

And if it is a boy...

And if we're on our own, there won't be anyone to call us freaks.

And in my experience, well read people are less likely to be evil.

And instead, you brought me this cold, disgusting nonsense.

And it all worked out because now I have you!

And it always returns.

And it better be hot this time, baby!

And it is one of the most important tools in any pre former's repertoire.

And it is one of the saddest songs ever composed.

And join a group of Snow Scouts as a cover

And Klaus was studying tidal charts,

And like flamingos, these sheep live on a diet of shrimp

And location can be divined via any spice based condiment."

And look at me now!

And look who else I found.

And made him think that books and poetry and learning would keep him safe.

And Mr. Tamerlane seems to think it was my fault,

And murder.

And my students were interested in so many things.

And needed an escape.

And people hurt me.

And read about the people who came before them..."

And research.

And said, "Shiver me timbers!"

And search for some orphans I seem to have misplaced.

And she's all alone.

And she's traveling with a bunch of dangerous looking people.

And silence.

And some stories go on,

And squashes rich kids.

And Stockholm Syndrome?

And that day happens to be tomorrow.

And that expression has become known as "Mount Fraught Syndrome."

And that is the story of Cinderella.

And that man is a threat to everyone here!

And the Baudelaire orphans are finally in my clutches!

And the ending where they live happily ever after.

And the horse blanket that smelled like nail polish,

And the least preferable slippery thing is a slope,

And the schism that tore it apart.

And the surrounding area has been flooded."

And the trained reptiles...

And their handwriting is that, unlike words written in ink,

And then Cinderella told Prince Charming

And then I get chosen False Spring Queen!

And then one day...

And then she divorced him and took all of his money. The end!

And then they die.

And then...

And these are my siblings, Klaus and Sunny.

And these children in the name of Count Olaf.

And these memories are often of people we've lost.

And they say the first bite of an apple tastes the best.

And they were charming and resourceful and had...

And they're obviously the Baudelaires! Look at their little orphan faces!

And think about it.

And this one is the worst.

And this vault is where we keep all the fortunes,

And those three plucky children.

And tomorrow, when that seawall floods,

And Vain Fashionable Divas.

And very pregnant.

And vice versa. We know what happened at the opera.

And Violet was right.

And watching the world go up in smoke.

And we always make Brucie carry our luggage.

And we know how you've spent your nights since.

And we'll find Sunny.

And we'll take that boat, and we'll sail back to where the action is!

And what did you find after the storm, Alonso?

And what if I refuse?

And when I met a child like that,

And when Klaus stuck his hand into a foothold

And when Violet said...

And when you do, it makes you want to hide under your desk.

And when you're inside, they make a Very Furtive Disguise.

And why did he bring up Anna Karenina?

And why did they keep all these secrets from us?

And why is he the only one wearing a mask?

And why nobody ever wants to leave!

And will instead refer to them the way almost everyone does,

And you had to protect something,

And you should be able to use it in any situation at all, like, um...

And you should join us by the fire.

And...

Animal behavior, the culinary arts.

Anna Karenina is a classic of Russian literature!

Another Decision Day has arrived.

Another set of voyagers will discover this book

Any last words?

Any surviving enemies. It...

Anybody who's not a cakesniffer knows that False Spring

Anyhow, it's late, and I feel sick from eating so many marshmallows.

Anyone who is not a bearded old coot on a desert island

Anyone wishing to leave the island?

Are we ready to do this?

Are you in the kitchen?

Are you sure that they're all orphans?

Are you sure we're safe from Count Olaf here?

Are you sure you two don't have a story?

Are you sure?

Argh!

Argh!

As a decent person, I never presume someone's gender,

As Count Olaf's prisoner.

As for Count Olaf, well, we've placed his cage by the seawall,

As I trace the sad, soggy case of the Baudelaire orphans.

As I'm sure you know, "labor" is the term for the process

As if someone dropped them whilst running for their life.

As if they knew one day they wouldn't be here.

As long as he thinks we're dead, Sunny is safe.

As the Baudelaires climbed the seemingly endless Vertical Flame Diversion...

As the man with the beard and no hair, and the woman with hair but no beard,

As their toboggan rushed down the frozen waters of Stricken Stream.

As we say in the theater...

As we utter our last words...

As you get closer to the end.

As you know, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire were intelligent children...

Assume you didn't have time to open the safe.

Astonishing revelations about a secret organization

At a school called Prufrock Prep.

At dinner, Ishmael referred to us as the Baudelaire orphans.

At last, after all these years...

At last, I have everything I have ever

At last, their fortune is mine!

At last, you bow before the king of Olaf Land.

At least for a night.

At least we'll have a nice, warm fire.

At the bottom of a surprisingly deep hot tub.

At the top of Mount Fraught,

At the top of Mount Fraught...

At their secret mountain headquarters,

Attention, colonists!

Aw, precious snowflake wants to question his life choices.

Aye! This is Captain Widdershins! Is anyone out there?

Babies are always plotting against people,

Bad apples?

Bad mentors can lead you down a slippery slope,

Baudelaire.

Baudelaires, I failed you.

Baudelaires, you seem agitated. Why don't you have some cordial?

Baudelaires?

Baudelaires.

Be a man and slay that baby, putz.

Be good to Esmé.

Beatrice Baudelaire.

Because I am amazing, brainy,

Because I'm the most accommodating, basic, calm

Because we burned them down ourselves.

Because we saw a spark in you bright enough to light a thousand fires.

Because you rarely meet someone who has one,

Because you've been on the run for many years and you're exhausted.

Because, Baudelaires,

Before slipping back into darkness...

Before the schism.

Being a leader is like being a parent. You try to keep your children safe.

Being righteous and well read never gets you anywhere.

Being trapped in a hot tub is even less "in" than getting in a hot tub on purpose.

Believe me, I'm not. Someone bring me some coffee!

Besides, I'm about to get everything I've ever wanted in life,

Boo!

Boring!

Boss, are these your parents?

Botanical hybrid. That's what Kit said was in the sugar bowl.

Bow before me, Friday!

But a great number of pregnant, irritated women.

But a young man with your talents doesn't need friends.

But before their third trip to Briny Beach.

But every year, there were a few children

But figurative fires need fighting, too.

But he recognized me.

But how about a diving helmet filled with the world's deadliest fungus?

But I didn't. Ow!

But I need to get back to the city. Where there's smoke, there's fire, and...

But I won't force you.

But I'll be glad if one of your parents if still alive.

But I'm afraid sailing over those sharp rocks, that's nearly impossible.

But I'm beginning to question my life choices.

But I'm not comfortable leaving Olaf to drown.

But I'm not supposed to leave you alone.

But I'm the guy holding the harpoon gun.

But I've always said reading stunts your growth.

But if I kill the baby, then I'll never get the Baudelaire fortune.

But if someone is still lurking around, that's very stupid.

But if you let me out, I can outwit him,

But in my short time in his employ,

But in the case of Anna Karenina, a daring life of impulsive passion

But instead, those two show up, try and berate and belittle me.

But it does mean I've read a lot,

But it's all fuzzy like a dream.

But it's impossible to think about anything else.

But it's not over yet.

But look at you now.

But most of all,

But now the case has dried up.

But now, finally, I'm on the right path!

But perhaps this doesn't have to end in violence.

But she had read their work in the books her parents had given her.

But some memories never fade,

But Sunny had watched her siblings escape many terrible situations

But that doesn't mean that the story is over.

But that's all in the past. The Baudelaires are dead to me.

But the eagles work for us,

But the unbridled arrogance to play a part for which he was thoroughly unqualified

But there are enemies everywhere.

But there are some people that have such a deep and lasting aura of menace

But there is also

But there is one thing I do know.

But these volunteers just volunteered.

But this is delicious.

But this is the only road through the mountains.

But trouble is like the tide,

But we have a map of the mountains you can consult.

But we know how to solve problems, don't we?

But we know someone who might.

But we now realize we cannot shelter them forever.

But we won't do that.

But we're glad we found you.

But we're not out of the woods yet.

But when you skim through a narrative, you get a strange view of the story,

But when you skim through a narrative, you get a strange view of the story,

But where is it?

But who teach us important things.

But why is he disguised as a Snow Scout?

But you haven't lived till you've had seafood fresh from the ocean!

But you're trying to manipulate my decency,

But...

By no coincidence, it is also a word that means "a very difficult task."

By one of the bravest women I've ever known,

By sailing it through the lowest point in that wall.

By taking them in at a point in their life

By which a woman gives birth.

C.M. Comstock. Mother gave me her book on female pirates.

Cake!

Cake!

Cakesniffers whispering in a cave. Is there anything less adorable?

Called The Incomplete History of Secret Organizations.

Can I at least have a blanket?

Can set you down a path to something horribly wrong.

Care for a drink?

Carmelita Spats.

Carmelita, maybe we could turn back.

Carmelita, they're not here to help you celebrate False Spring.

Carmelita, who are you talking to?

Carmelita, you've told nine stories already.

Carmelita! Carmelita!

Castaway!

Castaway!

Castaways!

Celebrate when you're half done and the finish won't be quite as fun.

Ceviche!

Chabo.

Cinderella was a young person

Circled in an old book by a woman who was a fierce volunteer,

Come now, there's nowhere to run.

Come on, Beatrice.

Come on, Snicket. All you've got to do is get off this mountain,

Come on! What are a bunch of hippies in robes gonna do?

Come on.

Come on. He's wasting our time.

Come on. We don't socialize with orphans.

Come to be shipwrecked with a man like that?

Come, Olaf. You too, Miss Squalor.

Could use a polish.

Could we grow rutabagas?

Count Olaf has someone you love. Now we have someone he loves.

Count Olaf needs one of us alive to get our fortune.

Count Olaf still has Sunny, and we have to get her back.

Count Olaf went this way.

Count Olaf will drown.

Count Olaf would be furious

Count Olaf. Your parents.

Courageous, dashing, enchanting,

Cover the cage! Shh!

Cross our hearts.

Darling, emblematic, frisky, grinning,

Defamation!

Despite my many years investigating the case of the Baudelaire orphans,

Destroyed V.F.D. once and for all,

Dewey says that.

Dewey.

Dewey's dead.

Did you bring me a banana daiquiri?

Did you find anything?

Did you find Sunny?

Didn't you float off in a bunch of balloons?

Do one good thing in your life, Olaf.

Do you have any nines?

Do you hear something?

Do you know how it feels

Do you know the part about the pirates?

Do you mean you killed them or didn't find them? I'm a bit confused.

Do you see anything?

Do you see that?

Do you smell that, Esmé? That's the fresh mountain scent

Do you think he's...

Don't be afraid. I'm Violet Baudelaire,

Don't be ridiculous! There's an espresso maker right over there,

Don't give me that look.

Don't rock the boat.

Don't run. I just want to torture you

Don't you miss your old lives?

Don't you miss your old lives?

Don't you understand that so much of life

Don't you understand, Baudelaires?

Down the Vertical Flame Diversion, and hike the same road the Scouts

Dr. Toronado.

Drink the cordial.

Drumroll! Curtain! Toss it up.

Duncan and Isadora are safe.

Duncan and Isadora.

Duncan?

During the course of their work.

Eeee...

Eliminate their parents in a series of arsons,

Enough!

Evade your enemies and their eagles, and safe guard the sugar bowl.

Even after so many years,

Even after the storyteller has stopped telling them.

Even if the book is long and the world seems to grow smaller every day."

Even though the best, like an interesting piece of mail,

Even to a terrible person.

Ever since you were orphaned, all you've done is complained.

Every morning, every afternoon, every night, and all day long!

Every parent figure I've ever had has either let me down or died.

Every path led to something horribly wrong.

Everybody runs around with their secrets and their schemes,

Everyone regrets their tattoos.

Everyone's happy.

Excuse me, miss.

False charges of murder,

False spring rolls.

False Spring?

Famished, gifted, hilarious,

Farewell, Baudelaires!

Farewell!

Father took us to her engineering lectures.

Female Finnish pirates.

Fine. Go.

Fine. I don't need those pasty faced prunes anyway!

Fire can solve any problem in the world.

Fire is one of the most dangerous things in the world.

First, we burned down the kitchen.

Flavorless ceviche isn't the most exciting meal,

Follow me.

Fools!

For anyone who wants to go, but no one ever does.

For example, we heard a nasty rumor that the survivor of a recent fire

For I am the one who committed all of those terrible deeds.

For several days, the bank robbers and prisoners

For the same reason that fast forwarding through a piece of televised entertainment

For years, or at least what seemed like years,

For, as Klaus and Violet Baudelaire had discovered...

Fortunately, like all women,

Freaks.

Freeze! Freeze!

Frisky, grinning, human, innocent, jumping,

From a botanical hybrid V.F.D. developed to defend us against the Mycelium.

From a self sustaining hot air mobile home.

From the wealthiest families in the city are on their way here right now.

Full of confusing utterances...

Get a good night's sleep before Decision Day.

Get me a coffee, orphans! I've had a very rough night.

Get me out of here at once!

Get moving, brat.

Get out as early as you can

Get out, freaks!

Give me that Springpole!

Give me that.

Give me those earrings, Rachel.

Give us the sugar bowl and you can go.

Go away, cakesniffers! This is a private cave!

Go chop wood, freak.

Go fetch them, Olaf.

Go fish.

Good heavens, where?

Good idea, Sunny. Let's investigate.

Good idea. You're an excellent climber. You're an excellent inventor.

Good morning.

Good night, travelers. The fire should die out in a few hours.

Got it?

Granola bar?

Ha! I've discovered an island!

Happy birthday!

Has anything really terrible happened to you?

Has been used to describe a situation

Has led to false accusations...

Have tumbled off a cliff and been smashed flat.

Have you considered building a water filtration system?

Have you read the story of Anna Karenina?

Have you read the story of Anna Karenina?

Have you seen her?

Having a good vocabulary doesn't guarantee that I'm a good person,

Having an aura of menace is like having a pet weasel

He could escape the cage and find the harpoon gun, or

He didn't approve of some of my life choices.

He felt more like the spout.

He has to make everything a big production.

He helps us decide what to keep and what to throw away.

He is going to be so angry!

He meant that literally.

He might even read about a secret mountain headquarters

He needs guidance.

He was in the kitchen drinking hot cider with his mother,

He was very mad at me when I left.

He'd never help us.

He'll welcome us with open arms and say all the nice things my dad never did.

He's at the headquarters. We're here to rescue you.

He's coming back. We have to go.

He's dead.

He's dead.

He's gone, Sunny.

He's just up on that summit.

He's keeping secrets from the entire colony.

He's not gonna tell us.

He's not just keeping secrets from us.

Hello, cakesniffers.

Hello, hello, hello.

Hello, little girl.

Hello?

Her baby is arriving. She could die!

Here they come now.

Here, I got you.

Here, take my lock pick.

Hey, baby, you'd better not be getting in trouble!

Hey, cakesniffers, now I have two sets of parents more than you!

Hey, that's a clever idea.

Hey, that's a good idea.

Hey, that's not fair.

Hey, the baby's gone.

Hey!

Hey.

Hiking up Mount Fraught to celebrate False Spring.

Hm.

Hmm. Not yet.

Hmm. Well...

Hold on. We'll be back soon.

Hooky was about to tell me his catchphrase.

Hot air balloon mishaps,

How about a compromise?

How can anyone be "xylophone"?

How can I be lost? There are signs everywhere,

How can we rescue her with that hook handed man standing guard?

How could you do that to her?

How dare you call me that!

How did so many people end up on the island?

How did that work out?

How did you capture them, my pet?

How did you get to be so brave?

How do we stop this caravan?

How do you like them apples?

How does a stranger know our names?

How elegant.

How would you like a desk job in the financial sector?

How would you like more than just a ride?

How you've been foiled by those irritating volunteers.

How's it going?

How's this?

Howdy, stranger.

However, the authorities discovered that they had become friends

Hugo? Colette? Kevin?

Human, innocent, jumping, kept,

Hurry up with it.

Hurry, I'm famished!

I abandoned my creation, and I sailed here to live in exile.

I agree.

I always hoped I'd be as good a mother as she was.

I am an actor.

I am supposed to be at the top of the world,

I am surrounded by incompetence and disloyalty!

I barely remember my old life. It's fuzzy.

I bet I can chart a course back to the city.

I bet I could build it with the items that have washed up.

I bet mountain climbers have interesting stories.

I bet they'll worship me as their king!

I can barely remember what their faces looked like.

I can create a compass. All I need is a piece of magnetized metal and a pivot.

I can feel her coming soon.

I can feel the fungus in my throat.

I can hear it now.

I can promise you the office will be buzzing with activity.

I can try, but I'm better at reading maps.

I can't believe it's been a year.

I can't feel my toes, and this luggage is heavy.

I can't leave her behind. She's my baby sister!

I can't leave you. How are you gonna get out?

I can't leave you. How are you gonna get out?

I can't move.

I can't thank you enough for driving me back to the city.

I cannot find where the Baudelaires went

I claim this island

I completely forgot that it fell off that cliff.

I convinced the others to lock him in a cage before he could recognize me.

I could not protect them, but I can protect their children.

I could take you to our facilitator, but he's not gonna like you.

I couldn't find the sarsaparilla, but look what I got.

I crown myself False Spring Queen!

I declare Decision Day is over!

I did see that name in a review that washed up.

I didn't have my first hang gliding lesson till I was seven.

I didn't recognize him at first, not with that ridiculous beard,

I do know where the Baudelaires went next

I do not know if Violet Baudelaire ever visited the Mortmain Mountains

I do not know what happened to the members of Count Olaf's troupe

I don't care about some late series backstory!

I don't care. I'll scratch her eyes out.

I don't have time to read a bunch of amendments!

I don't know how you got out of that cage

I don't know what "tuberous canopy" means.

I don't know where that is.

I don't know, they seem pretty relaxed to me.

I don't know!

I don't know.

I don't need any of them.

I don't need them.

I don't think so. Whoever it is, they're too tall to be Sunny.

I don't think that you are. You were right, Ish.

I don't think we can be sure that Violet and Klaus are dead.

I don't want to die.

I don't want to jinx it, but I think I found a wonderful candidate

I don't want your bitter fruit!

I failed your parents.

I fear that the Baudelaire orphans and I are in the same boat.

I feel a storm coming on.

I feel something weird in my throat.

I found an accordion.

I found some castaways!

I found the Medusoid Mycelium,

I found this birdcage.

I found this small black statue of a sea monster!

I found V.F.D. If you were in a building about to be burnt down

I gave you an order. Throw that baby off the mountain!

I got it.

I guess we didn't need to throw him overboard.

I had my doubts about putting a baby in charge of the cooking...

I had to sleep in the trunk.

I had to wait until the fire died down so I could show you.

I have aided in kidnapping and murder,

I have been on the run for many years, and I am exhausted.

I have come up with a plan.

I have ev

I have pursued the Baudelaire fortune

I have spent a bumpy ride in the trunk of a car,

I have to carry their luggage.

I haven't apologized.

I haven't felt this sharp and focused since I first smelled kerosene.

I honestly can't remember.

I hope Violet can invent a way up the waterfall.

I ignore the script and say whatever comes into my mind.

I joined Count Olaf because I thought he could teach me things,

I just had the oddest feeling,

I just wanted to scare you.

I keep the combination to the vault on the desk.

I keep wondering anyway.

I knew that dumb book would never help me, so I threw it in the fireplace.

I knew those terrible things had come to pass.

I knew your annoying curiosity would lead you here eventually.

I know it's nothing special, but... it's warmer than those rags.

I know this because of the stanza in a long and complicated poem

I know what I hope we'll find.

I know what you mean. I get the serious creeps from those serious creeps.

I know you do.

I know you will.

I know.

I know. I'm an actor.

I know. That's where I learned the Devil's Tongue Knot.

I live on the island.

I lost everything.

I made you this outfit.

I may be in a cage, Baudelaires, but I've still got it.

I may need that ride.

I mean, down curtain.

I meant figuratively. We have to decide which direction to go.

I meant that figuratively.

I meant that figuratively.

I must be hallucinating from the mushrooms.

I need medicine and your finest wine.

I need some space.

I need to find a way to have my mentors think I'm a raging success.

I need you to get your fortune.

I need you to move toward me very quickly and very quietly.

I never forgot you.

I once took in three orphans.

I only need to keep one of you alive to get your fortune.

I only watch network television.

I read about those terrible children in The Daily Punctilio.

I read his book on maps and his tutorial on the accordion.

I read that V.F.D. use them for sending signals.

I read those tidal charts on the Queequeg.

I said, "Well, well, well."

I salvaged these from the rubble. See the names?

I saw a diving helmet full of a dangerous fungus wash up. Do you see it?

I saw the boss chuck a half empty bottle of sarsaparilla down the road,

I see a ledge.

I still don't like this plan.

I suggest it very strongly.

I suggest we all retire.

I suggest you drink some cordial.

I survived the fire that destroyed my home.

I survived.

I think I know where it is. Sunny, stay with Kit!

I think I've got it. I just need to apply more friction.

I think it's for trapping eagles.

I think the original name is underneath.

I think we can do better than that.

I think we just trapped Esmé Squalor

I think we should go this way.

I think we should go this way.

I think we've found a use for it after all.

I think you should see this.

I think you're forgetting who the captain is.

I think.

I thought I tied you up.

I thought of some more demeaning tasks for you to perform.

I thought their eyes were going to pop out of their heads!

I thought we could go to a music hall and pick up sailors.

I thought working for Count Olaf would be glamorous and fun,

I thought you volunteers were supposed to be smart,

I thought you were a prisoner, but I'm beginning to think you're a spy.

I threw her siblings off a mountain and I'm keeping her as my servant.

I told them terrible things waited out there in the world.

I told you I would come back to the hotel, but then I saw an SOS signal

I told you I'd do that one last time.

I told you, False Spring Queen is a democratically elected position.

I took a cruise when I was pregnant with Friday.

I tried to warn them.

I used to be a school principal.

I wanted a nice, hot breakfast,

I was an orphan.

I was blindfolded.

I was going to use this big knife to force them to carry me up,

I was gonna be a marine biologist.

I was gonna say it first.

I was mentoring

I was once a member of a secret organization,

I was searching to see if any of the books survived the fire.

I went to get us some breakfast. I found these berries.

I will break open this diving helmet, and then, oh, you'll be sorry.

I will deal with you later.

I will offer the eldest Baudelaire this courtesy and...

I wish you'd stop saying that. It's not helping.

I won't let you take them.

I wonder whatever happened to her.

I wonder...

I would be burning down V.F.D. headquarters right now

I would like that very much.

I would recruit them into a secret organization.

I would throw the little traitor off this mountain right now

I wouldn't worry about boring questions like that.

I wouldn't worry about the headquarters.

I, uh...

I'd be a little less irritating.

I'd love to hear a Very Fascinating Drama.

I'd never throw you off a mountain.

I'd rather be alone.

I'd rather jump off a cliff.

I'll find you at the Last Safe Place!

I'll get out on my own. I always do!

I'll go!   I'll go!

I'll just slip into something more horrifying and pop right down.

I'll lead them away.

I'll pass.

I'll wrap the ankle. You handle Count Olaf.

I'm a castaway

I'm a tortured, brooding loner now.

I'm always happy to help.

I'm an individual practitioner, and I can throw a baby off a mountain on my own!

I'm beautiful and fashionable!

I'm beginning to question my life choices.

I'm definitely questioning my life choices.

I'm free.

I'm going to name it Olaf Land.

I'm going to need a little while to figure out what to wear.

I'm gonna tie these together and create a drag chute.

I'm grateful for the help, the granola bar,

I'm impressed.

I'm in love with

I'm kidding.

I'm looking for someone.

I'm not as strong as you, Baudelaires. I've...

I'm not just your boss.

I'm not sure we have need for a birdcage.

I'm not sure we like the taste. Do we have to drink it?

I'm on top of the mountain!

I'm on top of the world, Esmé.

I'm planning to ski.

I'm Quigley Quagmire. I survived the fire.

I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry to say that there is a great deal of wrong

I'm sorry. Did I do something wrong?

I'm starving!

I'm starving!

I'm surprised you didn't see it on the way down.

I'm Violet Baudelaire, and these are my siblings, Klaus and Sunny.

I'm your favorite?

I'm your niece.

I've been after it for a long time, and it's finally in my grasp.

I've been glowingly mentioned in reviews in several small magazines.

I've been trying to remember our life with our parents,

I've been worse.

I've burned down the Hotel Denouement,

I've done lots of good things in my life.

I've even heard of a brave snake

I've even taken up journaling.

I've got some bad news about that.

I've got some money saved up from the carnival.

I've heard about you.

I've lost my map, and I have no idea where I am.

I've lost the sugar bowl.

I've lost too much to go on.

I've never been so happy to see you brats alive!

I've never heard of Count Olaf.

I've never seen books at all.

I've never seen him look so calm.

I've never seen so many books.

I've triumphed!

Ice bees!

Idiot. You disappoint us, Olaf.

If everyone fought fire with fire, the world would go up in smoke.

If I didn't need her alive to get the Baudelaire fortune.

If I were you, I would throw that useless thing away,

If it is a girl, we will name her Violet.

If one of our parents is alive up there, they can fix this.

If one of our parents is alive,

If one of our parents is alive, do you want to face them without Sunny?

If Sunny could find out what they're planning,

If Sunny's up there, we'll bring her back.

If the answer was in this library, then it's gone up in smoke.

If there was another antidote, maybe they wrote it down.

If there was another antidote, maybe they wrote it down.

If these idiots hadn't insisted upon waiting for breakfast first!

If this message was left during the fire, then...

If we find the Last Safe Place, we can find V.F.D.

If we follow it, it should lead us to Count Olaf.

If we go to the headquarters, we can find V.F.D. They can help save Sunny.

If we leave, what will we find?

If we wait until we're ready, we'll be waiting the rest of our lives.

If you can't send a message, you leave one using the items you find in the fridge.

If you don't do exactly as I say,

If you don't tell us, you will die!

If you froze to death before he could get your fortune, so...

If you happen to find yourself on a slippery slope, watch your step.

If you have to hide a headquarters, it's a beautiful place to do it.

If you tell us, we might let you out.

If you would like the story of Sunny Baudelaire,

If you're outside, they keep the snow gnats away.

In a way, one can't help but admire them.

In any case, all of our stories begin in darkness with our eyes closed.

In case the people who burned down his home are still out there.

In morally questionable behavior?

In my own case, a daring life of impulsive passion

In the truth,

In this dark, freezing, probably haunted wood,

In time for our first child to be born.

In various scenic locales.

In what, boss? We don't have a car.

In which prisoners grow fond of their captors.

In.. in... in... What's a good word to describe me that starts with an "I"?

Including whichever Baudelaire parent survived the fire.

Indoctrinate them via a combination of emotionallydistant parenting

Instead of by secret tunnel in the dead of night.

Instead of telling you about the few moments shared between two friends

Instead, we're taking your car.

Investigating how a person might survive a fire.

Is a device that separates saltwater into fresh water and salt.

Is a personal philosophy of moral relativism

Is a poisonous mushroom that is infecting you with its deadly spores.

Is anyone down here?

Is he safe?

Is hiding in V.F.D. headquarters,

Is in the darkest jar of jam.

Is just waiting for people who have wounded you

Is not the same as watching it.

Is she alive?

Is that a rural life of moral simplicity...

Is that any way to greet the people who raised you?

Is that Violet never got to work alongside V.F.D.'s great inventors and researchers

Is that what you think?

Is the preferable personal narrative to a daring life of impulsive passion...

Is there another way to search a book without reading it?

Is when the weather gets unusually warm before it gets cold again.

Ishmael has locked me in here,

Ishmael is trouble. We have to leave.

Ishmael must be sneaking out when he thinks everyone is asleep.

Ishmael said forget your troubles.

Ishmael said they were dangerous and sent them here.

Ishmael?

Ishmael?

Ishmael's hiding something from us. We have to find out what.

Isn't that cruel?

Isn't that right, Brucie?

Isn't this fun?!

It all went up in smoke.

It can lead to a banker

It can lead to a brave and remarkable woman

It deepens...

It depends on how you look at it.

It doesn't even know how to get water from a frozen pond.

It doesn't matter who started it! Those spores are the Medusoid Mycelium!

It gave her an idea that could solve all of her problems.

It has been difficult for me to investigate Sunny Baudelaire's time

It has led to your defeat and humiliation.

It is a tale of arson...

It is I, Kit Snicket.

It is I, Kit Snicket.

It is likely your eyes were closed when you were born,

It is Sunny. She's safe.

It is the tale...

It isn't a cigarette. It's a signaling device.

It looks like the tide has turned and a storm is brewing.

It means being welcoming to strangers.

It means don't do anything that might cause trouble.

It might not be the police or...

It must be Sunny!

It opens with language.

It said they are murderers and arsonists.

It seems that her mother passed away, and now she's the duchess of something.

It should be rooted...

It sounded like it was working till the last word.

It sounds like something terrible is happening up there.

It tells the story of a small spider who is trying to climb a water spout,

It was a terrible situation,

It was after we sailed away from the island,

It was all going swimmingly until you botched the cue!

It was easy. He just picked her up and...

It was her idea. She insisted.

It was just an idea.

It was our mother's name, too.

It was theirs!

It wasn't my fault!

It will be, once the baby cooks it.

It will make the hair on your head stand straight up.

It works.

It would be helpful to visualize something specific.

It'll be easier to find Sunny when it's dark and when Count Olaf is asleep.

It'll be plenty of excitement.

It's a cordial made of fermented coconut.

It's a crossroads.

It's a crossroads.

It's a girl.

It's a good thing I am not a centipede!

It's a lovely view.

It's a shame we're constantly exploiting and threatening her

It's a slippery slope.

It's a strange place to celebrate your first birthday.

It's a terrible thing to do.

It's a Verdant Flammable Device.

It's about time! We could barely breathe in there.

It's all gone up in smoke.

It's all gone.

It's all over now.

It's almost Decision Day, and you have a decision to make.

It's been a year. That means the seawall will flood again tomorrow.

It's bitter.

It's breakfast.

It's called a catchphrase,

It's coming from Mount Fraught.

It's designer.

It's important to be well rested before committing arson.

It's just a pile of ash. Why the heck do you want to go there?

It's kind of nice.

It's like our parents were training us for V.F.D. and we didn't know it.

It's like she was preparing us for this moment.

It's more than fair. It's totally true!

It's Mother's handwriting.

It's normal for memories to fade over time.

It's not "in" to burn down a secret headquarters

It's not a good idea. It's a stupendous idea!

It's not an adjective.

It's not fire.

It's not just a chimney, it's a secret passageway.

It's not like we have a home waiting. It's not like we have a home anywhere.

It's not much further.

It's not my fault, darling, you know I hate to read.

It's okay, it's okay.

It's our fault she's gone.

It's pretty big, so I'm guessing it was used for big birds like eagles.

It's Storm Scavenging Day.

It's taped to the three hole punch.

It's that South American dish made from raw seafood

It's the best thing I've ever tasted.

It's the hot tub room.

It's their fault these bad things keep happening to us!

It's their fault we're...

It's time for a durability test.

It's time you learned why we're really on this mountain.

It's time you took responsibility for your actions.

It's too late.

It's tough losing family.

J.S. is calling a meeting for the whole of V.F.D.

Jacques Snicket said there was a survivor of the fire.

Jerome and I are having a trial separation.

Just as I no longer remember

Just like you'll never save those rich kids

Just promise me, Baudelaires...

Just to bring trouble to you poor island folk.

Just tossed her off that cliff not moments ago.

Keep in touch!

Kept, limited, meek, naploving, official,

Kit!

Kit!

Kit!

Kit!

Kit!

Kit! Kit!

Kit! Kit!

Kit...

Klaus is right.

Klaus!

Klaus?

Knows Count Olaf is very famous in many prominent theatrical circles.

La...

Lady and gentleman,

Last chapter.

Last Safe Place!

Later on, your parents sailed here, too.

Laziness is no excuse.

Leads only to tragedy.

Led to the death of a noble sibling,

Lemony!

Lemony?

Let me help you save yours.

Let me help you.

Let me out first.

Let me out, and I might tell you.

Let's go home.

Let's go. I can strap you to my shoulders and carry you down.

Let's hope it's not a hibernating animal.

Let's name her after your mother.

Let's use what they gave us.

Like a coastal shelf.

Like a daring, impulsive passion...

Like a dream.

Like handshakes, house pets, and raw carrots,

Like how to harness my natural charisma into a career in the performing arts.

Like I've never had to free myself from a chair being hoisted up a mountain.

Like most schools, it was an underfunded institution.

Limited, meek, nap loving, official, pretty...

Lions...

Listen to me, there are dangerous people on this mountain.

Listen to this.

Literally and figuratively at my peak.

Literature, science, music, theater,

Lived together in close proximity,

Look around, you saber toothed papoose.

Look at her carrying a pail!

Look at that useless baby.

Look at the waterfall.

Look at this bottle. There's some liquid in it that isn't frozen,

Look over there!

Look what I found, darling!

Look what I found.

Look what the baby made.

Look who's not a total disappointment after all.

Look, don't tell anybody I said this...

Look, green smoke.

Look, I didn't set out to be a henchperson or an actor.

Look, I'm not happy about it either, okay?

Lost too many people.

Lucky it was only a half day's hike to your taxi.

Madame Lulu always said, "You deserve better."

Make it fast! This road won't stay straight forever.

Making a surprising and out of character return.

Man hands on misery to man.

Many things are preferable when not slippery,

Many things have been taken from the Baudelaires

Many years ago in my own organization,

Marinated in citrus and spices?

Maybe I am.

Maybe if I throw you off Mount Fraught,

Maybe it's time to start.

Maybe it's too late.

Maybe she can give us some tips.

Maybe somebody else would like a turn.

Maybe Sunny can learn something.

Maybe the mechanism is stuck.

Maybe the Verdant Flammable Device burnt out.

Maybe this is the end of our story.

Maybe we can buy a little farm and grow rutabagas.

Maybe we should just move along to the production number.

Me neither, but what choice do we have?

Me, Count Olaf,

Me, too.

Me? I don't wanna. Make the baby.

Medically suspect surgery,

Medusoid Mycelium?

Might be a relative...

Might die?

Missing persons.

Mommy! Daddy!

Most deserving of approval person alive!

Most memories fade over time.

Most widely credited with the discovery of gravity.

Mostly for Sunny Baudelaire.

Mourning a terrible loss on the bank of a frozen stream.

Mr. Snicket?

Multiple fires?

Mush, mush, mush!

Mush, mush, mush!

Mush, mush, mush!

Mush! Mush!

Mush! Mush!

My baby will be an orphan.

My baby will never meet her father.

My brothers.

My fortune!

My God! Really? Oh, you're so sweet!

My longtime secretary recently returned to Winnipeg.

My name is Lemony Snicket,

My name is Lemony Snicket,

My name is Lemony Snicket.

My only regret is that I wasn't able to hear the splat,

My organization.

My parents, my true love, my henchfolk,

My parents.

My search remains fruitless.

My sister was an expert at doing the impossible.

My sister wonders why you don't use fire to cook.

My sister wrote that.

My submarine got attacked before I could reach them. I'm...

Next stop, Dark Avenue!

Next stop, Prufrock Prep!

Next stop, the Hinterlands, the Mortmain Mountains,

Next to the girl in the robe.

Nice night for it.

No one cares. Get back to work. The whole town's on fire.

No one will ever learn now.

No trouble at all. Though when you offered me a ride, I did assume you had a car.

No way!

No, Carmelita!

No, I can't. It would harm the baby.

No, I'm pretty sure it's money.

No, it's a frozen waterfall. Now throw the baby off it.

No, Mr. Tamerlane. I'm just arriving back in the city.

No, she shouldn't.

No, thank you. Our colony isn't a monarchy.

No, you're not. You're Count Olaf! A child can see that.

No, you're not. You're Count Olaf! A child can see that.

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No! I don't know.

No! No!

No.

No. Baudelaires...

No...

Nor do I know what's become of them since.

Normally. But we don't have citrus fruits or spices on the island,

Not all of them.

Not anymore.

Not anymore.

Not Count Olaf, not his troupe, not even your dad.

Not even Count Olaf? As long as he's around, nobody's safe.

Not falling is an excellent plan.

Not great.

Not like us! Not like us!

Not like us! Not like us! Not like us!

Not necessarily.

Not that I care.

Not to prance around with a bunch of talentless fools.

Not too long ago in the city of Stockholm,

Not when I know a secrets about

Not yet, they're not.

Not yet!

Now all of those people and the organization are gone,

Now follow me like the queen I am!

Now get off my throne.

Now I'm finally on the right path.

Now you look here!

Now, Carmelita.

Now, the rest of you children,

Now, this

Now, this is the story

Obviously dehydrated.

Of course I'm going to die!

Of course it isn't. That baby's trying to poison us!

Of course, he'll be thrilled. He'll get to kill you all over again.

Of course, not all mentors are good.

Of me.

Of murders, arsons, and charges of child endangerment,

Of Sleeping Beauty's even more adorable younger sister

Of the bright world dies with the dying sun.

Of the novel Anna Karenina, but I've never read it.

Of the novel Anna Karenina.

Of vanilla ice cream and root beer mixed together. However...

Oftentimes, if you want to do theater, you end up in a life of crime instead.

Oh, and you should probably get those freaks out of the trunk.

Oh, babylaire!

Oh, call me Ish.

Oh, call me Ish.

Oh, don't give me that look.

Oh, God, you sound just like my stepdad.

Oh, hello.

Oh, here you go. There you go.

Oh, it was before your time, dearest.

Oh, it's actually very "in" to dine alfresco.

Oh, my equally strong hands are equally in need of some mittens.

Oh, no, we just don't see each other anymore.

Oh, no, you won't.

Oh, no.

Oh, oh, oh! Oopsie!

Oh, oh, oh! This is my girlfriend.

Oh, Olaf, we're not emotionally distant. You just didn't deserve praise.

Oh, Olaf.

Oh, please. I've seen better performances from a chimp with a cymbal.

Oh, right.

Oh, this is rich.

Oh, we've heard about all your little mishaps, Olaf.

Oh, yes, I like to let them roam.

Oh, you are going to love this.

Oh, you're a trooper, kiddo.

Oh!

Oh...

Olaf captures people to get what he wants.

Olaf could learn from you, my dear. He's so flashy, so theatrical.

Olaf will be so disappointed you didn't die

On a chilly afternoon halfway up a frozen waterfall,

On a mission to find their missing stepfather.

On the Carmelita II, because I...

Once we find Sunny, we'll search for Duncan and Isadora.

One can too help but admire them,

One for Sunday, two for Monday.

One harpoon isn't much of a threat against a colony,

One of our parents has to be here!

One of the great sadnesses of the Baudelaire case

One of those things is their privacy, so...

One, two, three...

Only cakesniffers care about democracy!

Only figuratively. They were my mentors.

Only for you.

Only if you take responsibility for yours.

Only non cakesniffers with rich, living parents are allowed to join.

Only to be washed away again and again,

Ooh, anyone else feel that chill?

Ooh, no.

Ooh, that's also not...

Or a brandy sidecar.

Or a troupe of actors finding personal and artistic fulfillment.

Or at least this infant is.

Or eat the sheep. Sorry, she recently became interested in cooking.

Or if you are a seahorse, your father's yolk sac,

Or in order to teach you a secret code.

Or is it an excuse we use to justify doing bad things?

Or maybe a daring life of impulsive passion leads to something else.

Or maybe the person signaling got caught.

Or one of our parents.

Or the one you had in a jail cell?

Or to entertain you on a long car trip,

Or two submarine co captains

Or whatever it is pretentious people drink.

Or whatever sound a caravan makes when it falls off a cliff

Or whatever these green sticks are.

Or you belong to their acting troupe.

Or, "Give me those earrings, Rachel."

Orphans,

Orphans.

Our love?

Our mother had us memorize it.

Our mother read it to us.

Our parents gave us the answers in this room without even knowing it.

Our parents left us this book.

Our parents lived here? Did you know them?

Our parents never told us a lot of things.

Our parents never told us about him.

Out of your busy schedule of plotting arson

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow! Oh, this baby keeps biting me!

Page one.

Pajama bottoms. Absinthe. Nickelback. Let's try this right now.

Parsley soda!

Parts.

Pay no attention to those cry babies.

People here had hard lives before they found this island.

Perfect. Now use it to jam the wheel.

Perhaps I could be accommodating and give you a ride.

Perhaps if we saw what was ahead,

Perhaps when you were young,

Perhaps you're hiding in... whatever this room is. The...

Personally, I would never want to act. I'm in the financial sector.

Pirates?

Pistachios for everyone!

Pistachios for everyone!"

Pitch the tents!

Pleasant facial features.

Please don't go!

Please don't leave us!

Please turn around and lead the Snow Scouts some place safe!

Please, I want you to think of me as your mentor.

Please!

Please! This isn't some overexaggerated melodrama.

Precious snowflake wants to breathe.

Precisely.

Prepare for a tale so horrifying

Pretty, quarantined, recent, scheduled,

Probably weasels.

Promise me she won't be alone.

Push off, everyone!

Put her in the glove compartment.

Quagmire. Oh, uh... It's been so long.

Quigley Quagmire.

Quigley, does your map say where this stream is headed?

Quigley, hand me the candelabra.

Quigley.

Read the ingredients.

Reading Anna Karenina.

Ready?

Right, Sunny?

Sadly...

Safe travels!

Same as you see in our robes and our tents.

Scheduled, tidy...

Scoutmaster Brucie,

Search the caravan for anything long enough to reach the wheel.

Serving as a spider condominium,

She appears to be hurt...

She could almost hear Dr. Toronado saying,

She didn't capture us. We're here to trade her as a hostage.

She imagined my good friend Mrs. Comstock saying,

She knows who burned down the headquarters.

She learned to write couplets from our parents.

She must be so scared.

She needed to cook a hot breakfast for those same villains

She needed to cook a hot breakfast for those same villains

She never came back.

She said apple.

She was being held captive by villains on top of a mountain

She was rescued by a fairy godmother who magically created a special outfit

She was the one who was sending the signal. She's safe.

She won't be safe until we're together again.

She won't get far.

She's about this tall, she has a good set of teeth,

She's alive.

She's breathing.

She's gonna meet us down here as soon as she finds out anything.

She's in the middle of the mountains.

She's just acting like a helpless baby.

She's the Dutch courtesan who spied on Germany during World War One.

Sheesh, some days you just can't catch a break.

Shh!

Short, adorable, with the pretty brooch and the brass knuckles.

Should she really be running around the woods at night when she's pregnant?

Should we follow her?

Should we tell her about the one on a submarine?

Show some respect, Olaf.

Simply take the story of Cinderella and eliminate the fairy godmother,

Since that time, the expression "Stockholm Syndrome"

Since they lost their parents and their home.

Since we don't have any birds on the island,

Skimming a book is not the same as reading it,

Skinning you alive will be the second worst thing I've done in a hot tub.

Smoke? How are we supposed to get smoke out here?

Smoking is very, very bad for you.

Smoking is very, very bad for you.

Snow gnats. I read about them in an obscure book.

Snow Scouts are accommodating, basic, calm, darling, emblematic,

Snow Scouts should be accommodating. It's the first word of our pledge.

So Cinderella could go to a ball and marry a prince.

So he married her instead.

So I can drive faster than the speed limit and ram into other cars unsuspected.

So I decided it best to get out of town as fast as I could

So I said, "Oh, I know! We'll take the elevator,"

So I'm feeling generous.

So if you don't drink it, you might die of dehydration.

So if you want to survive,

So instead of being in bed with his siblings,

So many secrets...

So only use this to cook with.

So ours is just plain, raw fish.

So rarely arrives.

So sure, rutabagas.

So take off that ridiculous disguise!

So tell me, how did three children like you

So that when you left the safe place of your mother's womb,

So they can't hurt anyone.

So this is Sunny Baudelaire.

So when Count Olaf gave her that odd, green cigarette,

So when Violet used a candelabra to hammer some damaged forks into shape,

So will you. If you release the Medusoid Mycelium, we'll all be poisoned.

So you keep telling us.

So, everyone, get in your sleeping bags.

So, you had an idea for an invention.

Some things are easier to find in the dark.

Someone sang a certain song to you to lull you to sleep,

Someone's been reading a book.

Someone's built a water filtration system.

Something with a big engine

Something worse.

Sometimes a chapter might end,

Sometimes...

Sorbet, sashimi, and toast tartare.

Sorry, baby.

Sorry, just to be clear, when you say there aren't survivors,

Speaking of swimming, the smoked salmon smells great.

Spider!

Stay together.

Stay with us!

Stories about noble siblings

Stories about Vastly Frightening Danger.

Strange as it may seem, I still hope for the best,

Streams run into larger bodies of water, like rivers, and rivers lead into

Stupid secret organizations and their stupid secrecy.

Such as underage driving,

Such as?

Sugar?

Sugar.

Sunny Baudelaire had several problems she needed to solve.

Sunny Baudelaire's dead.

Sunny wanted to spy to find out more.

Sunny, what did you say?

Sunny!

Sunny!

Sunny?

Sunny.

Sunny.

Sunny's saying she wants to stay here and spy.

Sunny's saying she wants to stay here and spy.

Sunny's shivering, and I'm finding it hard to breathe.

Sunny's tough. She might look like a helpless toddler, but she's a fighter.

Take a bite of this apple. It'll dilute the poison.

Take a few steps closer and join us in a special celebration.

Take him to the seawall!

Take me to your leader.

Taught you how to set fires.

Technically, it's more of a fork.

Technically, it's more of a plateau.

Tell me, Baudelaires.

Tell me, what happened at the hotel?

Tell us first.

Tell us, what have you been doing with your life?

Than even one very dedicated, very lonely researcher can uncover.

Thank you for volunteering.

Thanks.

Thanks. But let's not celebrate yet. There's a long way to go.

That accompanies the arrival of certain people.

That baby just broadcast our location to every V.F.D. agent for a hundred miles!

That dead men rise up never...

That depends on how you look at it.

That even the weariest river...

That happened to our home.

That happened to our parents.

That I cannot bring myself to say their names,

That I wish we had our parents here and not just their handwriting.

That is what she means.

That it is easier to get used to happiness than despair.

That looks bad.

That looks like the Incredibly Deadly Viper.

That means if something seems wrong, it usually is.

That means V.F.D. is that way.

That no life lives forever...

That once held the finest reptile collection in the world.

That she's got an even more beautiful sister whose name is Carmelita,

That someone nearby was in trouble.

That sounds like one of Isadora's poems.

That sounds like work. Why do we have to do it?

That treacherous woman up there has dragged these books up to your colony

That was my favorite part. Books, and books, and books...

That... That can't honestly be your pledge.

That's a very nice name. Are you a castaway too?

That's an interesting question.

That's another word for boring,

That's because you spilled nail polish all over them.

That's easy. Sir Isaac Newton.

That's funny.

That's me.

That's not all we're celebrating.

That's not the only thing that's strange about this message.

That's odd.

That's okay. You bought me time to make this.

That's right!

That's right. That's your name.

That's strange. Yeah, it looks like they're on fire.

That's the problem with your side of the schism.

That's the way of the world, Baudelaires.

That's where Ishmael said he sends everything dangerous.

That's where the map said the headquarters were hidden.

That's why he's locked me in here, so I don't spill his secrets.

That's why nobody remembers your lives before the island,

That's why you asked about it earlier.

That's your mother's handwriting.

The 13th time you discover somebody is following you,

The 13th time you drink a root beer float,

The apple isn't working.

The apples from the tree.

The baby is watching us.

The baby's making breakfast. We'll have the henchpeople set the table.

The baby's making breakfast. We'll have the henchpeople set the table.

The Baudelaire fortune is small potatoes.

The Baudelaire fortune?

The Baudelaires are confused.

The Baudelaires chose to make new friends at school,

The bossery.

The central theme of the novel Anna Karenina...

The cure is right above our heads!

The darkest jam is boysenberry.

The Department of Orphan Affairs is going to be buzzing, Mr. Tamerlane!

The difference between your memory of a person

The first phrase is the name of the scientist

The first thing I'll buy is a new car.

The fullygrown woman fed to fullygrown leeches.

The gathering's less than a week away.

The handsomest, most successful,

The herpetologist, poisoned by his own venom.

The Hotel Denouement burned down in a fire years ago.

The Hotel Denouement, please.

The hour's not over yet. Klaus, stay with Kit.

The hybrid immunizes you.

The ice is pretty thin. False Spring must be coming.

The keyboard is wired to the hinges. You have to type a phrase.

The Last Safe Place.

The Last Safe Place."

The Latin name of the lions found in the Hinterlands.

The Madame Lulu who got eaten by lions, or the one who drove off in a taxi?

The mechanism was stuck.

The mind has a thousand eyes, and the heart but one.

The night has a thousand eyes, and the day but one.

The noble side of the schism may have the carrier crows

The number of olives is the day of the week it is.

The only spice based condiment is this jar of mustard.

The only way to survive in an ethically complex world,

The orphans may be mutinous, but they're still under my protection.

The place was deserted. The rumors were obviously false.

The point is, we still have time to turn our lives around.

The schism was a long time ago. That baby must be all grown up.

The seasonal gourd that becomes a carriage,

The seawall shelters us from storms,

The second.

The ship hit an iceberg, and I washed up here.

The smoke went out.

The Snicket file.

The Snickets. The Quagmires.

The snow gnats stopped.

The song is "The Itsy Bitsy Spider,"

The special outfit, the ball, the prince, the marriage,

The stanza is this:

The storm's blowing suddenly around here.

The sugar bowl.

The survivor might follow the tunnel until it led to a house...

The third phrase is the central theme

The tines on these forks will dig into the ice.

The tines on these forks will dig into the ice.

The Vertical Flame Diversion?

The volunteers murdered to death

The water's rising. If you don't get off, you'll float away!

The waterfall will be slippery.

The way I carry every letter I ever received from Beatrice...

The whole point of the Snow Scouts is that we do the same thing over and over!

The wind has died, and we're exhausted from rowing.

The world is a complicated and confusing place,

Their attempt to rescue their friends led to more villainy,

Then again, the 14th time you are followed to your motel room,

Then burning it down will solve all of our problems.

Then do something for once in your pathetic life!

Then somebody needs to find it. Quigley, how are you at cracking codes?

Then there would be nobody in the world

Then we burned down the parlor, then the disguise room, the ballroom,

Then we'd better keep walking.

Then you could smash his glasses and watch him bump into things!

Then, while waiting for them to come of age so we can seize their fortunes,

There are no happy endings, and in that respect...

There are often people in our lives who are not our parents,

There are people I'm looking for.

There are several carnival freaks running around somewhere.

There aren't any spices on the island!

There aren't any survivors now.

There is a story that describes more or less the same situation,

There is still much I do not know.

There is.

There it is again.

There might be a message hidden now.

There must be something inside that scares them.

There should be...

There were those who prayed on impressionable minds

There you are, baby.

There you will find a tarp. Bring it here and lay it over the road.

There's a camp in the woods.

There's always one thing you can do.

There's an annotation. "See page 252."

There's no index.

There's no paper.

There's no table of contents.

There's no way to know.

There's nothing here! No horseradish. No wasabi.

There's nowhere to run.

There's our flock of sheep. They were shipwrecked here, too.

There's so much we could teach you.

There's someone coming down that slope!

These are my subjects.

These icy winds are making my hopelessly contorted body shiver.

These people are called mentors.

These robes may be comfortable,

They built the most incredible inventions.

They built this house,

They call it Decision Day,

They definitely killed those carnival freaks.

They don't seem like they appreciate the arts.

They escaped Count Olaf in a self sustaining hot air mobile home.

They fell off a cliff.

They had their own reasons for sending you out into the wild.

They left.

They lived with their parents in a mansion in the heart of a busy city.

They may be young, but I've never known a Baudelaire who didn't rock the boat."

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder,

They started that enormous fire that's still raging across the hinterlands.

They stay because it's safe, and they trust me to keep it that way.

They wanted to start a family someplace safe.

They were talking about making more orphans.

They wrote in that book, they cooked delicious meals, and...

They're gonna kidnap the Snow Scouts and murder their parents.

They're in our cave, so obviously they're cakesniffers.

They're so stupid.

They're the ones who burned down V.F.D. headquarters?

They've been in that tent for a while. I wonder what they're planning.

They've gotten themselves out of a number of dangerous situations.

Think of the fortunes.

Think of the orphans.

Think of what you could invent with all this.

This advice was given to me

This baby doesn't stop complaining, no matter how many times I pinch her.

This birdcage is bigger.

This can't be the end, not when we're so close to so many things.

This can't be the end, not when we're so close to so many things.

This cave is for Snow Scouts only,

This doesn't look like V.F.D. headquarters.

This is a great deal of wrong, for me!

This is my moment of ultimate triumph!

This is my troupe.

This is no job for a baby. If there's a volunteer down there...

This is our chance to leave.

This is our facilitator, Ishmael.

This is probably a test. If we prove to Count Olaf we can survive a night

This is Quigley, his brother. He survived the fire. There's so much to tell you.

This is the end.

This is totally different from the last time we locked you in a birdcage.

This is where everything has led us. The maps, the codes...

This ledge is solid. We should sit here for a moment to get our strength back.

This looks like the tunnel we found under our house.

This must lead to the other side of the island.

This place was my last hope to finding my brother and sister.

This road leads to the Valley of Four Drafts.

This toast is raw. Is it safe to eat raw toast?

Those are poisonous.

Those blankets smell like nail polish.

Those villains were talking about making more orphans.

Those weren't weasels.

Though, of course, there are still unknowns.

Thought you could get away, did you?

Three phrases, and if you get them wrong, it locks forever.

Throw Sunny Baudelaire off that cliff!

Tidy, understandable, victorious, wholesome,

Time and again. What do you have to say for yourself?

To be clear, we're going to kidnap a bunch of rich kids,

To destroy our enemies once and for all,

To fighting fire with fire.

To fill that vacant administrative assistant position.

To finally, finally die?

To give us an acting lesson, boss.

To our newest castaways! To the Baudelaire orphans!

To rejoin the world...

To stand against the ignorance and injustice of this world?

To the Baudelaires!

To the outrigger!

To the V.F.D. agent she'd recently heard was on the mountain,

To the V.F.D. agent she'd recently heard was on the mountain,

To try so hard to please people who fail to recognize your talent?

To walk down a mountain.

Today the seawall will flood, and we've reached our decision.

Tonight, we're celebrating False Spring!

Toss her.

Toward the edge of a cliff.

Troupe 113 is the most exclusive Snow Scout troupe in the city.

Try not to think about falling.

Trying to outwit one another,

Tuberous canopy. The roots above!

Twins, actually.

Two out of three Baudelaire orphans

Ugh!

Ugh! Flat.

Ugh! This is cold, raw fish!

Uh, fall right out.

Uh...

Undoing years of therapy.

Unless you give me those three orphans and that canoe.

Unnecessary physical fitness,

Until it seems that he will never reach his destination.

Until you give me the location of the sugar bowl.

V.F.D. built these passageways everywhere.

V.F.D. have a secret way to leave coded messages in case of fires.

Verbal Fridge Dialogue?

Verbal Fridge Dialogue.

Verbal Fridge Dialogue. It's a code used in emergency situations.

Very lovely, indeed.

Via a wide variety of brilliant, only partially successful schemes.

Violet had just tied up her hair to invent a steering mechanism,

Violet, hurry! We're running out of road!

Violet, I don't feel too good.

Violet, now would be a great time for an idea.

Violet, would you stay?

Violet!

Violet! Quigley!

Violet...

Wait, I know of a horseradish factory off Lousy Lane.

Wait! Baudelaires, you can't let these people take me away!

Wait! Do you know how to light a fire?

Wait.

Wake up, everybody!

Wandering these tunnels.

Was hiding at V.F.D. headquarters, so we paid it a visit.

We are en roo tay to the secret V.F.D. headquarters

We brought you ceviche.

We burned down the classrooms, and the movie theater, and the hot tub,

We came here to raise children someplace safe,

We can find them, but only if you can tell me the central theme

We can sail the outrigger there and be saved!

We can skim it

We can start at the beginning.

We can't die in here.

We can't just push a person overboard.

We can't shelter her forever. Her parents knew that.

We can't wait that long. Sunny's in danger right now!

We carry them with us,

We celebrate with a dance around a special pole,

We could buy a patch of farm and live off the land.

We could grow literally anything!

We could make it a quieter, safer place.

We could prevent this from happening to anyone else.

We could walk in on the entire organization having a meeting.

We did run into one of your old associates, the Snicket girl.

We did sleep in the trunk.

We didn't die!

We don't have time for your nonsense. We need your help.

We don't have time to read an entire book.

We don't have to go back at all.

We don't have to just be stuck here in the middle of the ocean

We don't know who you are. How do we know we can trust you?

We don't want to be your henchfolk. We don't want to play your games.

We failed to stop Count Olaf from releasing the Medusoid Mycelium.

We found the answer, but I don't know the words.

We have a big day ahead of us.

We have a motto on this island:

We have an outrigger you see that large canoe? standing by,

We have eliminated the Baudelaires.

We have extra parkas and snow suits if you're cold.

We have no room for bad apples here.

We have some extra horse blankets you can sleep on.

We have to find horseradish, or another culinary substitute.

We have to get her to shore.

We have to go back through the Vernacularly Fastened Door,

We have to invent some sort of a braking system!

We haven't failed yet.

We haven't seen anyone. We've been in this cave hiding from gnats,

We helped Count Olaf burn down the hotel.

We know all sorts of stories.

We know exactly how that feels.

We know. We carpooled.

We lost our parents and our home in a fire.

We lost our sister, too.

We may not have a navigational compass, Sunny, but we still have a moral compass.

We mean figuratively.

We meant with the Quagmires.

We met a Lemony, remember?

We must've made a wrong turn at that fork. Somebody read the map wrong.

We need horseradish or another culinary substitute!

We never told him that we lost our parents.

We read about fermented beverages here. They're an opiate!

We send all the dangerous items to the other side of the island

We should discuss that first.

We should go that way.

We should rest.

We stand on the brink of our greatest triumph.

We taught you to think big.

We took you in in your darkest hour

We wear the same parkas, we recite the same pledge,

We were hoping to find one of our parents up here.

We were prepared to take you back, Olaf.

We were very young, so she'd stop to explain all the words and themes.

We wholeheartedly agree.

We will leave the island in a boat Bertrand has built and named after me,

We will surprise those volunteers in the middle of coffee, or tea,

We won't drink any, and neither should any of you!

We won't let her down.

We would all stay in our mothers' wombs,

We'd rather not share.

We'll be waiting for the rest of our lives.

We'll burn down their parents' homes.

We'll camp here for the night and burn it down in the morning.

We'll capture every one of those uniformed brats,

We'll contact you with your next assignment.

We'll do better with the next recruits.

We'll find out when the fire dies. He was right about one thing.

We'll get it on the way down.

We'll get you out, but only if you help get our sister back.

We'll keep an eye out for her.

We'll send the eagles. They're probably starving.

We'll use these to pull ourselves up and test for thin ice so we don't fall.

We're alive, but we're not okay.

We're alive.

We're almost there. Let's hope our parents cooked with spices.

We're close.

We're gonna get you help.

We're here to help you celebrate False Spring.

We're impressed with your work.

We're in the same boat.

We're not falling for that!

We're not sure, but they are safe.

We're okay. We survived the storm.

We're on a coastal shelf. There is no coffee.

We're on the coastal shelf of an island surrounded by a seawall.

We're right at the source of Stricken Stream, so...

We're sorry, too.

We're starting to think it wasn't a coincidence.

We're too weak from the poison.

We've already yelled at the baby. There's not much else to do here anyway.

We've been on the run for a long time, and I'm exhausted.

We've got plenty of ice water.

We've recreated the botanical hybrid in the tuberous canopy."

We've recreated the botanical hybrid in the tuberous canopy."

Well, every career path has its drawbacks.

Well, I hope you find 'em, Miss...?

Well, I wish you would mush faster.

Well, I won't force you, but we don't have fresh water here,

Well, I'd prefer not to.

Well, Ishmael

Well, maybe I'm tired of taking orders from a lady who smells like cats.

Well, not anymore.

Well, so is the city. I just experienced a bank robbery,

Well, that sounds promising.

Well, the poem means that the name of the person sending the message

Well, they didn't.

Well, tick tock.

Well, we can't set sail on a boat named the Olaf.

Well, we may not have a hostage, but we're not leaving without Sunny.

Well, well, well.

Well, well, well.

Well, well, well.

Well, while you were being whiny and useless,

Well, you should know by now,

Well, you started it!

Well...

What a nut job.

What an adorable little girl. Would you like to join us?

What are you doing?

What are you looking at, pipsqueak?

What are you thinking?

What choice do we have?

What choice do we have?

What did you find?

What do we do about Count Olaf?

What do we do?

What do you say, Snicket?

What do you think they're up to, baby?

What do you think we'll find up there?

What do you think you're doing?

What if our stomachs couldn't tolerate fresh water

What if they refuse?

What if we started fighting over what to drink in the first place?

What is this? I wanted orange juice. This is just orange ice!

What it was like to travel by trolley in the light of day,

What just happened?

What kind of baby doesn't know how to start a fire?

What kind of monster stuffs someone into a birdcage?

What secrets?

What was her name again?

What were you thinking, giving a Verdant Flammable Device to Sunny Baudelaire?

What will you name her?

What?

What? It was a little girl.

What's False Spring?

What's more beloved than dinner theater?

What's next?

What's that thing your brother used to say?

What's the last phrase?

When a fire breaks out, the Official Fire Department is there to fight it,

When he dropped you off that mountain.

When I get my hands on you,

When I point at you, say the first thing that pops into your head.

When I was your age, I was supposed to waste my entire summer

When my boyfriend finds out that you trapped me down here,

When she took some strings from a burnt ukulele,

When Sunny looked up from the black bean and mango salad she was preparing

When The Daily Punctilio washed up and I read about the fire,

When the prisoners were finally freed,

When the schism broke out,

When they might be particularly lost or vulnerable.

When they sailed away from that burning hotel so many years ago,

When we could be nurturing her talents for the collective good.

When we go back in the morning, he'll be so impressed,

When we recruited you, it was to spread fire and destruction across the land.

When you can have them all?

When you fight fire with fire, the world goes up in smoke.

When you were even smaller and more delicate and demanding than you are now.

When you're on top of something, such as a moral threshold or a mountain...

Where are we?

Where do we go from here?

Where she'll starve and go feral

Where to, young lady?

Where's Hooky? I told him to wait right here.

Whether you encounter them years later at the top of a mountain,

Which gives their wool its unique coral hue.

Which is why I implore you to look away.

Which is why, when I perform,

Which lead to arguments, which lead to schisms.

Which led to more things too horrible to mention,

Which led to unhinged villainy,

Which means it was recently thrown by a person who doesn't care about littering.

Which one do you think it is?

Which one should it be?

Which only leads to tragedy.

Which refers to the way even small, seemingly harmless actions

Which seems kind of dumb for a secret organization.

Which was very hard to burn.

Which, when investigated,

While she went to get the rest of the family.

Who are you really?

Who are you?

Who are you?

Who are you? Wait.

Who call themselves actors.

Who else found something to share?

Who lost your home in a fire and then Vice Princie expelled you.

Who put you in charge?

Who she hoped might be able to rescue her.

Who smelled the smoke...

Who survive fire and eagles to be reunited at last.

Who swam a great distance to carry an apple to a certain outrigger.

Who teased her and made her do all of their chores.

Who wants to abandon the scout leader on the side of the road

Who was placed in the care of various wicked people

Who were those horrible people?

Who's L. Snicket?

Who's Mata Hari?

Whose worst crime is not any of a long list

Why don't you step closer?

Why is our mother's handwriting in that book?

Why isn't it opening?

Why settle for one fortune...

Why won't anyone call me Ish?"

Why would we want masks?

Why, what a pity.

Will you take us to your colony?

Winds somewhere safe to sea.

Wise decision.

With a little research, you might learn of a secret organization

With clever ideas.

With Count Olaf gone, we'd be safe to go wherever we wanted.

With more stories

With only a few cold salmon, and she needed a way to signal

With the bank robbers.

With the same gleam in their eyes that you have.

With their parents inside.

With this.

With...

Without wearing a fashionable outfit.

Without wearing a fashionable outfit.

Would you like to hear a story about our family?

Wow, it's really nice that you're taking time

Xylophone, young, and zippered.

Yay!

Yeah, a big pile of money.

Yeah, here.

Yeah, listen to her baby talk.

Yeah, she acted like she knew us. That was weird.

Yeah, us. We're dangerous criminals in Count Olaf's troupe.

Yeah, well, your equally strong hands can go and chop us some wood.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yes, Baudelaires.

Yes, but ideas lead to more ideas,

Yes, it called him a ham.

Yes, Mr. Tamerlane? Are you in the office?

Yes, now that you mention it,

Yes, that was many years ago,

Yes! I have a girlfriend.

Yes?

Yes. That weird feeling

Yes. We played a crucial role in your education, didn't we, Olaf?

Yet the light of a whole life dies when love is done.

Yet the light...

You are a wicked man.

You are. We came here to rescue you.

You cakesniffers should sleep far away from us.

You call this a colony? It's just a bunch of yutzes!

You can be my henchfolk.

You can die.

You can help by saving Sunny. I'll stay here and see what I can learn.

You can shoot me if you'd like.

You can try to push back against the troubles of this world,

You can use that toboggan to escape.

You can't change the words of the Snow Scout Alphabet Pledge.

You could drink something other than coconut cordial,

You could take your mask off now. They're asleep.

You did not yet know the people who would shelter you as your life began,

You don't have to worry about that.

You don't have to worry about the headquarters...

You don't mean

You ever go ice fishing? My stepdad used to take me.

You find what you're looking for.

You first, Ish.

You freaks can't stay in our campsite.

You had something to tell us about Ishmael.

You harpooned me.

You have to fight fire with fire.

You have to fight fire with fire.

You have to go on.

You have to help Kit.

You have to leave now, before

You have to. You're sick.

You haven't discovered it. There are already people living here.

You haven't seen anyone in trouble, have you, miss?

You hear me?

You heard about the Quagmires?

You heard the lady. Breakfast!

You hurt people.

You invented a way up the mountain. Now it's my turn to use my talents.

You just don't always know what you're doing.

You keep the island, I'll take the children. Okay, that didn't go

You know this story.

You know, I swear she was in that cage, boss.

You know, it wasn't my idea to plunge your siblings to their deaths.

You likely no longer remember what it was like to be a small, gurgling baby,

You literally started it!

You look lost.

You made me choose,

You made us orphans in the first place!

You may be the big kahuna on this rinky dink island,

You may enjoy it less than the first time because you have become used to the taste

You may have noticed in your life

You mean yurts. And they're tents.

You might find canned peaches to eat...

You might learn other startling information.

You moved into the penthouse at 667 Dark Avenue.

You must be exhausted from the storm. We'll get you some fresh clothes.

You need my help?

You needed somebody to help you open the door.

You once threw a masked ball here and didn't invite me.

You orphans are the worst henchpeople I ever acquired.

You really think one kind act will make me forgive you all your failings?

You really want to do the same thing as him?

You remember what got you stranded here to begin with.

You said the sugar bowl could help us. What's in the sugar bowl?

You saved my siblings, Baudelaires.

You see, once a year, the tide rises high enough to launch a boat

You seem stressed, boss.

You seem to have lost all your underlings.

You seem to have trouble controlling your underlings.

You should be more accommodating. After all...

You should carry your own luggage, Carmelita,

You should keep Klaus!

You should leave. There are dangerous people on this mountain.

You should stay the night here, travelers.

You should take some deep breaths. Maybe a short constitutional.

You shouldn't be here. This mountain is dangerous.

You started V.F.D.

You think I had a nice warm tent my first night in Count Olaf's troupe?

You think you deserve our respect?

You think you're so clever.

You took a plucky schoolboy

You want to stay where there's nothing to read or invent?

You were lost before we recruited you.

You were out cold, and I don't mean just because of the temperature.

You will be.

You will obey my order this instant!

You would never survive in the mountains by yourself.

You!

You!

You! Dispose of that baby!

You...

You...

You'd better come out now.

You'd never reach it in time!

You'll do it because we say so.

You'll learn your lesson.

You'll never save your sister,

You'll never stop us, if that's what you mean.

You'll turn back when I say you can turn back...

You'll understand when you're older.

You're asking why a grown man would knowingly engage

You're awake!

You're better at climbing too. I saw you in the Vertical Flame Diversion.

You're going to cook a very fancy, very "in" dinner.

You're gonna be okay. We found a way to dilute the poison.

You're gonna use that odd, green cigarette to smoke that salmon?

You're here with little Olaf?

You're in luck. Alonso's making

You're not as stupid as you look, though that would be impossible.

You're not on your own, boss. You've still got me.

You're not volunteers at all. You're Baudelaires!

You're quest your life choice

You're short for a volunteer,

You're Snow Scouts?

You're still rotten, Olaf.

You're that man with the hair and the woman with the beard, or vice versa.

You're that villain we put in a birdcage.

You're thinking of Al Funcoot.

You're those orphans from Prufrock Prep

You're too concerned about that baby, Olaf.

You're trapped in a hot tub.

You've always had your irritating siblings to look after you.

You've caused almost as many problems as your parents did.

You've got cinders on your face.

You've got, uh...

You've had a phone this whole time?

Your baby needs you.

Your despair is much greater than the first time

Your friends in V.F.D. betrayed you,

Your glove!

Your headquarters are destroyed,

Your obsession with the Baudelaires is a disgrace.

Your parents lived on this island.

Your worst enemies are on top of that mountain,

and should be welcomed with gifts. You're not!

Everybody freeze! Stop!

He's gone. He left his boots. And a trail of footprints.

head to the nearest car dealership! We can't head anywhere.

I found this in the poetry section. "Odes"?

I knew it. You're the Baudelaires! I hope not!

I wish our parents could help us. Maybe they still can.

I've seen a lot of smoke. I was a Snow Scout in my youth,

It is Kit! Pay no attention to that woman!

It looks like... It can't be.

It's the only cure! Or wasabi.

like a spyglass. A volunteer?

Mother? Father!

No. Yes.

Not like us! Stop standing around.

Our Uncle Monty lived there. No one lives there now.

Panthero Leo. V.F.D. used to train them

Thank you. You deserve better.

That's a strange color for sheep. Common in flamingos,

That's your only regret? What about your tattoos?

There has to be another way. Klaus?

They'll never make it. There has to be something we can do.

We know that book. But how do What are you doing?

We regret ours. Not me.

What happened? I don't know.

You know, free range henchpeople. We have a job for you.

"Countless orphans." "Countless fortunes."

A warm fire. Yes, this will do nicely.

Allow us to remind you. You lost those triplets.

and so are stories about dead parents. Carmelita has a point.

and so will those children. No.

And Sunny. And Sunny.

And you left her? They're planning something bad.

Anything else? Yeah, they sting.

Are you ready? If we wait until we're ready...

Argh! Mr. Poe,

Can you remember anything from the map? I didn't look at it for long,

Cover the cage! Cover the cage!

Decision Day isn't over yet. Because we've decided to leave.

Directionless. Alone.

Do I have to take your friend? He's not our friend.

Do you have the sugar bowl? We failed there, too.

Do you know where they are? Are they safe?

Do you see? If the surviving parent

Do you think we can trust him? He must be with V.F.D.

Embarrassingly unconvincing Mean spirited!

Except off a cliff. Which we plan to throw you off anyway.

For now. For now?

Have you been following me? With great interest, for some time.

Henchpeople, do something! You don't have any henchpeople.

Hey, the baby's gone. That's a terrible catchphrase.

How did you know it was here? I've read about it in a book

How did you steal my keys? We'll be in touch.

How do you know? We helped them.

How does it open? It's called a Vernacularly Fastened Door.

I can make a pulley to get her out. Or...

I don't like rutabagas. Forget about the rutabagas!

I got caught in a tempest. I got caught in a manatee accident.

I hope it's a picnic. It's never a picnic.

I picked the lock with a fish bone. I'm going to put you right back in.

I prefer to work on my feet. We have an opening.

I say she's the real freak, not us! Not like us!

I thought that was horseradish. Horseradish cures you.

I'd like that a lot. You can't shoot all these fine people.

I'm Esmé Gigi We know who you are.

I'm glad to have you back, Sunny. Me too, but we're not safe yet.

I'm in love with you more. Now, that's catchy.

I'm in love with you. Not bad.

I'm in love with your girlfriend. Eww.

If ineffective. They were certainly scared.

Ishmael. Now look here...

It doesn't have to be you. Yes, it does!

It was my brother's taxi. You'll have to thank him for me.

It's a dead end. Maybe not.

It's a long story. Extremely long.

It's deadly? We need horseradish!

It's fashion. Esmé.

it's my way or the freeway. Roadway.

Jacques Snicket? But Jacques Snicket's dead.

Kit! Kit!

Let me out first! Ishmael is going to let you drown!

Let me see your eyes. Hm?

Lies. A tedious blowhard.

Like that girl from Prufrock Prep. What girl?

Lovely spot, isn't it? Secluded.

Mother? Father!

My fortune! The Baudelaires!

No! Don't shoot!

No! It's a trap!

No! No!

No! Oh, yes. My favorite henchperson

No! What do you mean "no"?

Not at all. I need a cigarette,

Nothing wrong with a little opiate! Ishmael's trying to control you!

of T R Y M F! What, darling?

Oh, no. What are those?

Oh, yeah. Dead as doornails.

Or? Get me out of here!

Our mother. Our father.

Ow! How dare you give a cigarette to a baby?

Ow! Ow!

People I've lost. Us too.

Probably the mom. Women are more resilient.

Quigley! Violet!

She doesn't sound like a spy. She sounds like a helpless baby.

She insisted? She volunteered.

She's just a baby. She can't be a spy. She's not a baby anymore.

Slander. A preening, prancing nincompoop

So it could be someone from V.F.D. Or it could be Sunny.

So we're stranded. Not quite.

Sunny! We're here.

Take a bite. No, I can't.

That way. Aargh!

That would be a first. I was talking to Ms. Squalor.

That's a charming theory. Let's put it to the test.

That's a good point. Yeah.

That's Quigleforth Quagmire. Quigley.

the headquarters is behind that door. That's an impressive lock.

the henchpeople, pet. Oh.

The refrigerator. Exactly. So I searched the fridge.

The schism. Yes.

The storm must have washed us over it. A lot of things washed over it.

Then I guess we have to trust her. What choice do we have?

There are five olives. Thursday.

There's a more direct way to the top. No, there's not. Look at the map.

They all abandoned you. That's right!

They may have the sugar bowl. I'll go!

They were gonna name me Lemony. I wonder why that name was so important.

They're here to kidnap you! I'm too adorable to kidnap.

They're our friends. Where are they?

to the entire world! You're making a terrible mistake!

Triumph! I'm not sure that's the way you spell

Violet. You washed up on an island.

Violet... Yeah?

Wait! But sometimes when you skim,

We could arrange a trade. An exchange of hostages.

We have to get back. Is there a way off this island?

We have to get out of here. You're not going anywhere!

We have to get up there. It's a long way to the top.

We know it. You don't know anything.

We look after her. How?

We love you... And we'd do anything for love.

We mean no. We're done participating in your schemes.

We're not the ones doing it. We're not stopping it either.

We're not your henchpeople! What is there to eat around here?

We've never been to Prufrock Prep. He did not expel us.

Well, we're not them. We're... Mountain climbers.

Well, well. Who do we have here?

What are all you cakesniffers doing here? Carmelita!

What did you do with her? She got away.

What did you read? They're ill tempered and well organized.

What if I put on a show? Is that a good idea?

What if you don't make it? You could spread the fungus

What kind of crops would we grow? We could grow anything.

What stops them? Smoke.

What's your name? Friday.

where would you hide it? A safe.

Where? Here.

with Quigley Quagmire again. Quigley!

You have a car? I was thinking of going to the city.

You needed a push. A good, hard shove.

You're gonna be all right. I'm afraid we're all far from all right.

You're Quigley Quagmire. We heard you perished in a fire.

...a slippery slope can also be literal.

...and a life on the run.

...and finally...

...and increasing desperation

...and something fishy,

...basic, calm,

...it was almost as if she could hear a man named Snicket say, "If this works,

...mountain climbers. We're looking for our sister.

...out of context revelations...

...there's nowhere to go but down.

...they could not help feeling like that poor spider.

"A figure from the shadowy past has washed ashore.

"A library's like an island in a vast sea of ignorance..."

"And this entire series of unfortunate events."

"At that time, Mr. Poe was known by his stage name..."

"But perhaps many years from now,

"Codes."

"Forget your troubles."

"Gatherings use a cured fruit based calendar,

"Have you considered the Sumac knot?"

"In case the treachery of the outside world reaches our shores,

"It's a slippery slope" is an expression

"It's my way or the freeway."

"Mind the tines, Violet. They can be delicate."

"Particularly if the library is tall

"The darkest of the jams of three contains the sender, look and see.”

"The others concern me too.

"The stories they left behind..."

"Vinegar, mustard seed, salt, turmeric,

"We know that no book can contain every story in the world,

"We're embarking on a new voyage,

"Where there's smoke, there's fire" is an expression

"Xenial" is an adjective that begins with X.