King of the Hill - Season 4 Edit

A BOOK HERE THAT MIGHT HELP YOU OUT WITH THAT.

A DOCTOR TOLD ME I MIGHT NOT WALK AGAIN.

A GENTLEMAN DOES NOT KISS AND TELL.

A GENTLEMAN DOES NOT KISS AND TELL.

A JAPANESE MACHINE GUN BLEW AWAY HIS SHINS.

A NAZI SQUAZI

A NAZI, NAZI, SQUAZI?

A SERRATED SHEEPS FOOT BLADE, A LANYARD RING

A STAMP TO ANSWER THAT, DO YOU?

A STUPID LITTLE HILL?

A THOUSAND?

A YOUNGSTER WITH A TOOL IN BOTH HANDS

AAAH!

AAAH!

AAH!

AAH!

ABOUT HOW DIDI WAS STARTING TO HAVE HER BABY.

ABOUT MY LONG DISTANCE SERVICE.

ACROSS THE LINE, OF COURSE.

AFTER TWO WEEKS, I WAS DOWN TO MY LAST RAT.

AH, PEGGY, YOU REMEMBER

AH, THE TURTLES.

AH, WE'LL SEE ABOUT ALL THIS.

AH...

AH...

AIN'T YOU COMING, HANK'S WIFE?

AIN'T YOU GOING

AISLE 8A?

ALL I'LL DO IS EAT!

ALL MEN ARE THE SAME.

ALL MY HORMONES BEING TOO CLOSE TO HER HORMONES.

ALL PARENTS CARE ABOUT THESE DAYS IS

ALL RIGHT

ALL RIGHT, COTTON

ALL RIGHT, HELP.

ALL RIGHT, I'LL CALL HIM "G.H."

ALL RIGHT, KIDS, LIGHTS OUT.

ALL RIGHT, ON THREE.

ALL RIGHT, SIX.

ALL RIGHT, THEN.

ALL RIGHT!

ALL RIGHT! I'VE HAD ENOUGH, DAD!

ALL RIGHT. PASS UP YOUR APPLICATION.

ALL SHE EVER DOES IS CRY AT ME.

ALL THE WAY!

ALMOST MAKES ME WISH

ALREADY A SUBSTITUTE TEACHER HERE

AM I IN A VERY WIDE BED?

AN EVEN THOUSAND.

AN EXTRA CHAPTER AT THE BEGINNING.

AND IF YOU'VE GOT THE TALENT METAL.

AND AT A FRACTION OF THE COST.

AND AT SOME POINT I SHOULD PROBABLY TAKE A SHOWER

AND BE APPROVED BY A DAMN COMMISSION.

AND BY THE WAY, I CHECKED.

AND CAN I TEMPT YOU WITH SOME TOASTER STRUDELS?

And dinner for two at the Arroyo.

AND EMBOLISM, EVEN DETACHED RETINA.

AND FOR EVERYONE HERE AT ARLEN HIGH.

AND FOR OUR PURPOSES NOW, A PHILLIPS HEAD.

AND FRESHNESS AND ALL THAT?

AND HELP ME FIND THE BABY?

And here's the tricky part

AND HIS DISQUALIFICATION FOR SUBSTITUTE TEACHER OF THE YEAR.

AND I AM ALSO REMINDED

AND I AM GOING TO HAVE YOU... WALKING AGAIN IN NO TIME.

AND I CAN'T GET YOU PAST AISLE 5.

AND I DON'T KNOW WHY.

AND I GET TO HAVE BABIES.

AND I HAVE TO WATCH THOSE TWO, COTTON AND STUPID

AND I PUT NEW, NON SLIP DAISIES IN EACH TUB.

AND I TELL YOU WHAT.

AND I THINK THAT'S THE BILLDOZER.

AND I THOUGHT I DODGED A BULLET WHEN LUANNE WANTED TO TEACH.

AND I TOOK THE BABY'S BOTTLE?

AND I TOOK THE LIBERTY

AND I WAS FLUNKING TRIGONOMETRY.

AND I WAS TIRED, TOO, WHEN I WAS ORDERED

AND I'LL BET THE COST BENEFIT YAHOO

AND I'LL LET YOU DANCE ON MY GRAVE.

AND I'M GOING OUTSIDE TO ENJOY LIFE!

AND IN PROTEST, I, PEGGY HILL, HAVE DECIDED

AND IT DOES, TRUST ME JET SKI, JULY, '94

AND JUST TWO MONTHS LATER, I HAVE LANDED ON MY FEET.

AND MAKE THEM ALL SPARKLY.

AND MOWED THE WHOLE FIELD

AND MRS. HOSNER ERASED HER MISTAKES WITH SPIT.

AND NO ONE'S GOING TO MAKE FUN OF US

AND NOW I GOT TO GO BEGGING FOR A WAR HERO'S GRAVE?

AND NOW WE'RE GIVING YOU THE HONOR OF RAISING IT.

AND POISON.

AND PROVIDED IT MADE IT THROUGH THE ATMOSPHERE

And Ricky was the only thing anyone was talking about

AND SEVEN VOTES FOR...

AND SHE HAS MANNERS, TOO.

AND SHE JUST HAD A BABY.

AND SHE'S SUCH A NICE WOMAN.

AND SHOW SOME LEG.

AND SOMEHOW, HE WALKS

AND THAT IS WHAT I WAS MUTTERING.

AND THAT YOU ONLY WANT ONE THING.

AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE'RE GOING TO DO NOW.

AND THAT'S PRETTY HEROIC TO ME

AND THAT'S WHEN COACH CALLED FOR...

AND THE SCHOOL BOARD.

AND THE STEAK TASTES SO... CLEAN.

AND THE, UH... OINTMENTS.

AND THEN I'LL TALK TO BOBBY.

AND THEN LET HIM MAKE UP THE GAMES THE NEXT SEASON.

AND THEN THEY CAN'T APPRECIATE IT.

AND THERE ARE NO SUBSTITUTE TEACHERS

AND THERE'S JUST PLAIN BEING CHEATED.

AND THIS IS THE ONLY WAY I'M GOING TO MAKE IT.

AND THIS TOOTHY, POINTY...

AND USUALLY MEN ARE THE EVERYTHING.

And wait till he hits junior high.

AND WE BOTH LIKE PLAYING BOGGLE.

AND WE WERE PLAYING THE WAHATCHEE COWBOYS.

AND WE'VE GOT NO PLACE TO PUT OUR NAPKINS.

AND WEATHER REPORT... AND THE FISHING REPORT

AND WHAT IS THE WORD ON ME?

AND WITH HIS HELP, PEGGY HILL IS DOING THINGS

AND WORK ON THOSE DIMMER SWITCHES?

AND YOU CAN PUT HIM IN FRIDAY'S GAME.

AND YOU GET INTUITION.

AND YOU MUST ACT DIFFERENT, LIKE AN ADULT.

AND YOU'RE TELLING ME, YOU CAN'T CLIMB

AND YOUR FATHER AND I STUDENTS.

AND, NANCY, YOU MAKE SURE HE TAKES IT OFF

AND, THEN, YOU FALLING AND ALL

AND, UH... CHAD.

AND, WHEN YOU'RE SLOPPY IN THE PROPANE BIZ

AND, WHILE SOME THINGS ARE BETTER LEARNED THROUGH GUESSING

Announcer: And Arlen has a first and goal!

Announcer: Arlen to punt the ball.

Announcer: Interception!

Announcer: Now that Ricky has broken the record

Announcer: Ricky Suggs gets the handoff.

Announcer: Ricky Suggs!

Announcer: That ties the record for career touchdowns

ANY SHAVES TODAY, BILL, OR JUST HAIRCUTS?

ANYONE NOTICE THAT BROKEN WINDOW IN THE CHEMISTRY CLASS?

ANYONE'S PARENTS OUT OF TOWN?

ANYTHING THAT CAN BE USED AS A WEAPON IS A WEAPON.

ANYTHING. DON'T MAKE ME COME DOWN THERE.

APRIL 30, '45, AT THE OCCUPATION OF MUNICH...

APRIL 30, MAY 2 THAT'S TWO WHOLE DAYS.

ARE YOU A LEAKER?

ARE YOU ACTUALLY TRYING TO DEFEND HIM?

ARE YOU ASKING ME

ARE YOU COMPARING ME TO LUANNE?

ARE YOU DYING ON ME?

ARE YOU LEAKING ON ME RIGHT NOW, LEAKY?

ARE YOU SCARED?

ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS?

ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE READY?

Arlen High's very own senior running back, Ricky Suggs.

Arlen will allow Hentoff to score a makeup touchdown.

ARLEN'S NUMBER ONE!

Army Sergeant Barber Bill "The Billdozer" Dauterive!

AS LONG AS I'M AROUND

AS LONG AS IT'S WELL LIT AND THE OUTLETS ARE GROUNDED

AS USING A GUN TO CUT A TWO BY FOUR.

ASPIRIN THIS MORNING, RED WINE LAST NIGHT.

ASTERISK!

ASTERISK!

At the Arroyo Diner.

AT THE SAME TIME?

AT THE TEXAS STATE CEMETERY.

AUNT PEGGY!

AW, COME ON, PEGGY

AW, NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DONE.

AW! THEY'RE GOING TO RUN OUT OF GRAVES

AW... NO.

AW... WHY...

BAAAAAH!

BABY SITTER VIOLATE PAROLE?

BABY.

Back in action! This Friday!

BACK OFF, EVERYBODY!

BACK OFF!

BAND AIDS AREN'T GOING TO WORK IN THIS SITUATION.

BAPTISM BY FIRE, MY FRIEND.

BE A WOMAN AND GET ME MY SHIN JELLY.

BECAUSE HE'S SAYING THE SAME THING.

BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO HURT YOUR FEELINGS, BUT, UH...

BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE ONE ANYMORE.

BECAUSE SHOP IS BIGGER THAN ANY CLASSROOM OR GARAGE

BECAUSE UNLESS IT'S FLYING ABOVE MY HEAD, I CANNOT DO IT.

BECAUSE YOU WILL ALWAYS BE

BECAUSE YOU'RE WEAK.

BECAUSE, UH, OF WHAT YOU WERE JUST SAYING...

BEFORE I FALL ASLEEP RIGHT HERE AT THE TABLE.

BEFORE THE END OF OUR LAST SEASON

BEFORE THE GROUNDSKEEPER COULD?

BEFORE THEY MADE THIS A STUDY HALL?

BEFORE YOU WERE BORN.

BELTON HAS THE TOUGHEST DEFENSIVE LINE IN THE DIVISION.

BESIDES, I CAN'T GET UP.

BETWEEN THE BAMBOO BARS OF MY CAGE.

BIG BAD CAN!

BIG PROJECT WAITING TO BE FIXED.

BILL, THERE'S BEING A GOOD SPORT

Bill: I DON'T WANT TO MISS IT

Bill: WHOO HOO! THERE YOU GO, RICKY! RICKY!

BIRDHOUSES.

BLACK.

BOBBY AND I ARE LATE ALREADY

BOBBY, EVERY WOMAN HAS A PERIOD...

BOBBY, FIND ME A FROG.

BOBBY, FROM NOW ON, WHEN I ASK, "HOW WAS YOUR DAY?"

BOBBY, GO HELP BOOMHAUER

BOBBY, HONEY, COME ON IN HERE.

BOBBY, I'M DRIVING YOU TO SCHOOL TODAY.

BOBBY, IF WE'RE GOING TO GET THROUGH THIS

BOBBY, SINCE YOU'RE DOING ALL THE WOMAN'S WORK AROUND HERE

BOBBY, SUCCESS ON THE FIELD

BOBBY, YOU ARE AT AN AGE NOW WHEN...

Bobby: ALREADY DID IT.

Bobby: DANG IT, DIDI!

Bobby: DOES THIS FINGER

Bobby: I ALWAYS PUT MY NAPKIN ON MY LAP.

Bobby: LOOK, DAD!

Bobby: UNCLE...

Bobby: YEAH, THE BIG YAHOO.

BOBBY?

BOBBY?

BOBBY... COULD YOU BUY ME SOME LOTTERY TICKETS?

Boomhauer: SAY LIFT ON THREE, MAN

BOY, I TELL YOU WHAT

BOY, I'M SO TIRED.

BOY, IF HE WASN'T PLAYING ON ST. AUGUSTINE GRASS, I...

BOY, THIS NAPKIN HOLDER IS SMOOTH ENOUGH

BOY, WE SURE ARE A LONG WAY FROM AUTOMOTIVE.

Bringing the number 72 out of retirement

BUBBLES.

BUREAUCRATS LIKE MOSS DON'T RESPOND TO REASON, HANK.

BUSY SCHEDULE, I HAVE CHOSEN TO HIGHLIGHT ONLY A FEW

BUT A FUN PRACTICE.

BUT A PROJECT LIKE THIS MINI FOOSBALL SET MIGHT JUST TURN HIM AROUND.

BUT BARBER SCHOOL AT FORT BRAGG...

BUT BEFORE THAT, I GOTS TO FILL OUT AN APPLICATION

BUT FOR THOSE FOUR DAYS WHEN I'M A WOMAN

BUT GIVE IT TIME, AND IT'LL CARVE THE GRAND CANYON.

BUT HARDLY A WEEK GOES BY

BUT HE WILL NOT ROT IN THE TEXAS STATE CEMETERY.

BUT HERE IS A LIST OF PRODUCTS FOR CONNIE

BUT I AM VERY TIRED...

BUT I CAN'T DO BOTH.

BUT I CAN'T TAKE CARE OF A DRIPPIN' WITCH CHILD.

BUT I DO KNOW THAT MY DAD DOESN'T HAVE SHINS

BUT I GOT SPIT UP ON MY GOOD SHORTS.

BUT I GOT TO GET BACK TO THE PROPANE GAME ON MONDAY.

BUT I JUST FELL BACK ON NATURAL INSTINCT.

BUT I RETOOK IT ANYWAY.

BUT I THINK YOU HAVE TO START OVER WHEN YOU FALL OFF.

BUT I WASN'T REALLY SICK.

BUT I... I CAN'T.

BUT I'M IN CHARGE NOW.

BUT I'VE NEVER SEEN A BIRD BUILD A BOOMERANG OR A DARTBOARD.

BUT ISN'T IT A GAS, MR. HILL?

BUT IT COULD NOT BREAK MY TEACHING BONE

BUT IT FEELS LIKE I'M DOING BOTH OF THOSE AT THE SAME TIME.

BUT IT'S ONLY...

But let's get back to Bill.

BUT LOOK HOW WE REMEMBER HER

BUT MAYBE FOR NOW, JUST PULL DOWN YOUR SHIRT.

BUT MY PLATE'S FULL, SITUATION WITH A TERMITE

BUT NOW YOU ARE DIFFERENT

BUT PEGGY'S GOT A BROKEN BACK.

BUT REMEMBER, JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE LIKING IT

BUT SHE WANTS TO BE DISCHARGED.

BUT SHE'S OKAY?

BUT THAT SHOULDN'T STOP YOU FROM PURSUING

BUT THAT'S AUNT PEGGY'S PLACE.

BUT THAT'S IT!

BUT THAT'S IT.

BUT THAT'S OKAY; WATER'S SOFT, TOO.

But then just two hours later

BUT THEY CAN'T MAKE A PARACHUTE THAT OPENS.

BUT THEY'RE ALSO PART OF PROPER SAFETY ATTIRE.

BUT THIS IS THE SPORTS JOCK AND CHAD.

BUT TO SAND AND DRILL AND CHISEL THINGS

BUT WE GOT SOMETHING THEY DON'T...

BUT WHAT DID WE SAY?

BUT WITH ALL THE NOISE FROM THE ENGINES

BUT WITH ATTITUDE MUMMY FOR THE '90s.

BUT YOU TOLD ME TO DO EIGHT TO 12 REPS.

BUT YOU'RE SUPER ORGANIZED.

BUT, CARL

BUT, UH, DAD, YOU CAN TAKE OUT YOUR TEETH.

BUT, UNTIL THEY INVENT A MACHINE

BUTT JOINT.

BY MEANS OF FRAUD AND BAD SPORTSMANSHIP."

BY NOW, YOU HAVE PROBABLY ALL HEARD ABOUT THE SUSPENSION

CALLED IT "JUNGLE RICE" TASTED FINE.

CAME TO..."

CAN I ASSUME YOU'RE ABOUT TO TAKE YOUR OWN LIFE

CAN I BORROW TWO STUPID DOLLARS?

CAN I PLEASE BE EXCUSED?

CAN MAKE YOU SLOPPY

CAN TAKE CARE OF THAT BABY.

CAN WE BORROW YOUR TOOLS?

CAN WE DO A WHOLE UNIT ON ROUTERS NEXT WEEK IN CLASS?

CAN WE MOVE THIS ALONG?

CAN YOU BOTHER SOMEONE ELSE FOR FIVE MINUTES

CAN YOU HOLD IT IN?

CAN'T HANDLE FLANNEL, MAN, DANG OL'

CAN'T WE JUST STAY HOSPITALIN'

CAST MAKE YOU LOOK GOOD FOR PEGGY HILL

CEMETERY PLOT 4, SECTION K.

Chad: Hey, hold on, we've got a little feedback here.

Chad: Mm hmm.

Chad: That Bennett boy's a hoss, all right

Chad: You know St. Margaret's

Chairman: THAT CONCLUDES TODAY'S BUSINESS.

Change... of... subject.

CHOO CHOO TRAINS?

CLOSE UP SHOP.

Coach: OKAY, BILL.

Coach: OKAY, EVERYBODY. HUDDLE UP.

COLONEL, FROM YOUR DRESS AND DEMEANOR

COLONEL.

COME ON IN.

COME ON, BILL.

COME ON, BOBBY.

COME ON, COME ON, COME ON.

COME ON, CONNIE, PICK SOMETHING.

COME ON, GUYS.

COME ON, LADY, MAKE THEM SHINE.

COME ON, MAN.

COME ON, PEGGY HILL, ROOKIE MISTAKE.

COME ON, YA OL' TUB OF SLOP.

COME ON!

COME ON!

COME ON!

COME ON. GRAB SOME FLOOR.

COME ON. ISN'T ANYONE GOING TO SAY

COME.

COMFORT HER?

COMFORT ME!

COMING OVER LIKE THIS, MAN?

CONNIE STARTED HER PERIOD.

CONNIE, DO YOU LIKE YOUR SYRUP WARM OR COLD?

CONNIE, HONEY, IT'S PAST 8:00 ALREADY.

CONNIE, YOU FEEL THINGS MORE NOW.

Connie: ...AND MY DAD JUST CRAWLED

Connie: YOU KNOW, MR. HILL

CONNIE'S OLD ENOUGH TO STAY BY HERSELF, RIGHT?

COO COO CA CA!

COO GA GA GA GA!

COOL.

COTTON INVENTED A BAYONET TECHNIQUE

COTTON WANTS ME TO CUT BACK ON MY SLEEP.

COTTON, MAY I HAVE THIS DANCE?

Cotton: A NAZI, NAZI SQUAZI?

Cotton: DANG IT, WOMAN!

Cotton: HAD TO GET YOU OUT OF THE HOUSE!

Cotton: I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

Cotton: I FOUND IT!

COULD DIAL 9 1 1 WITH HIS NOSE

COULDN'T I JUST TAKE MY VACATION AT MY DESK?

CREATE A UNIFIED THEORY OF EDUCATION.

Crowd ( chanting ): RICKY! RICKY! RICKY!

CRUEL, CRUEL FATE!

Currently held by class of '74's Bill Dauterive

DAD HAS VERY GOOD BUZZ.

DAD, I THINK CONNIE IS GOING

DAD, MOM'S TALKING.

DAD, THIS ISN'T RIGHT.

DAD!

DAD!

DAD!

DAD!

DAD...

DALE, GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE.

DALE, I JUST GET SO LONELY...

DALE, YOU KILL ANY BUGS?

Dale: THIS RECORD IS ALL BILL'S GOT.

DAMN ZERO TOLERANCE.

DANG IT, BOBBY, THAT'S NOT HOW YOU SET A RECORD

DANG IT! YOU SAID IT WAS A BOY.

DANG IT.

DANG OL' GIRL IN THE HOUSE RIGHT NOW, MAN.

DANG OL' GRASS SKIRTS, MAN.

DANG OL' HAWAII, MAN.

DANG OL' THREE THEN GO

DEAL.

DEAL.

DELICATE CRYSTAL WINE GOBLET.

DEPENDS ON HARD WORK OFF THE FIELD.

DID ANYONE SHOW YOU HOW

DID HE EVER TELL YOU HE SURVIVED EIGHT DAYS

DID I! NO.

DID SHE SAY WHAT THAT WAS? BECAUSE I AM SO CONFUSED.

DID YOU SEE THE WAY MY BOY LOOKED AT THAT NURSE?

DIDI HILL HAS POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION.

DIDI, ARE YOU LEAVING?

DIDI, DID YOU NAME THIS BABY YET?

DIDI! WHERE'S DIDI?

DIDI?

DIDI'S DEPRESSED AND YOU'RE NOT.

DIDN'T YOU HEAR THE BELL RING?

DO PLANES HAVE PHONES?

DO YOU HEAR THAT, HANK?

DO YOU KNOW WHAT TORTURE THAT IS?

DO YOU REMEMBER?

DO YOU WANT TO BE IN CHARGE, HANK? NO.

DO YOU WANT TO BE IN CHARGE, HANK? NO.

DOCTORS SAY I'M OUT FOR THE SEASON.

DOES NOT MEAN THEY ARE LEARNING IT.

DOESN'T COUNT. MEETING IS NOT ADJOURNED.

DOESN'T MEAN I CAN'T HOLD ON TO A PIECE OF PAPER.

DON'T BANG THE... ( screams )

DON'T BE SO TOUGH ON YOURSELF.

DON'T EVEN TAKE SHOP.

DON'T HAVE A HEART ATTACK, MISTER.

DON'T LOOK AWAY!

DON'T LOOK DOWN AT YOUR LEG.

DON'T NEED HER WHEELCHAIR NO MORE.

DON'T TALK LIKE THAT, PEGGY.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME.

DON'T WORRY, CONNIE.

DON'T WORRY, COTTON.

DON'T WORRY.

DON'T YOU EYEBALL ME!

DON'T YOU THINK I AM TRYING? I CAN'T.

DON'T YOU TOUCH ME.

DON'T... GET... ME... STARTED!

DOWN...

DR. HERTIG SAYS YOUR TEETH ARE LOOKING GOOD.

DROP BY DROP, MRS. FLORES.

DUH, INCOMING!

EEK!

EH, WON'T EVER HAPPEN.

EMILY!

Emmitt Smith scores!

ESCORT MR. HILL OFF SCHOOL GROUNDS

EVEN MOM?

EVER FALLEN OUT OF A PLANE AND LIVED TO WIN

EVERY DROP COUNTS, MRS. HILL.

EVERYBODY LOOKS PRETTY CLEAN.

EVERYBODY SEEMED REAL HAPPY ABOUT RICKY BREAKING THE RECORD.

EVERYBODY!

EVERYTHING I LOVE IS TAKEN FROM ME!

EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW IS IN HERE.

EXCEPT AT MOVIE THEATER, WHERE YOU CHILD

EXCEPT FOR OLD MAN CRYBABY

EXCEPT FOR TEN MINUTES EVERY HOUR AND 45 MINUTES FOR LUNCH.

EXCEPT WHEN IT'S RIGHT NEXT TO THEIR DEATH EXPERIENCE

EXCUSE ME?

EXCUSE ME.

FAIR AND SQUARE.

FALLING FROM THAT PLANE

FASTER THAN I COULD GO GUT THEM

FATTY, FATTY AND DOC.

FETAL POSITION, PLEASE.

FINALLY THIN ENOUGH TO SLIP

FINE, AWAY FROM ME.

FINE, I'LL GET YOU THE...

FINE! YOU SIT ON THAT COUCH!

FIRST CALL, MAN.

FIRST LADY OF THE AMERICAN STAGE.

FIRST THING TOMORROW

FIVE POUNDS.

FLUNKED HISTORY LAST YEAR

FLY.

FOCUS ME, HANK! IT'S RICKY!

FOR A SECOND, I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE

FOR ALL THESE FANCY TEACHING AIDS...

FOR BIGGEST COMPUTER CONVENTION THERE IS.

FOR GOING TO "OM LANDY MIDDLE SCHOOL" NO MORE!

FOR HIS NAPKIN HOLDER.

FOR ME TO DO IS JUST LEAVE EVEN THOUGH YOU'RE CRYING?

FOR ME, ANYWAY.

For most career touchdowns!

FOR MY MOM'S BIRTHDAY.

FOR OUR MOMS.

FOR OUR SUBSTITUTE TEACHER OF THE YEAR STRAW POLL

FOR SUBSTITUTE TEACHERS WHO ARE LATE.

FOR TAKING CARE OF THIS, KAHN.

FOR TAKING SUCH GOOD CARE OF THE TROPHY BALL.

For the two point conversion!

For their delicious chicken fried steak

FOR YOUR GREASE MOAT THERE.

FOR YOUR PORTRAYAL OF DR

FOUR DAYS A MONTH.

Four touchdowns last night.

FOUR VOTES FOR MRS. PEGGY HILL I THANK YOU

FOUR VOTES UNDECIDED OKAY

FRANKLIN DEE ELEANOR ROOSEVELT.

FROM HIS MOTHER.

FROM SYSTEMS ANALYST TO SENIOR SYSTEMS ANALYST.

FROM THIS CHICKEN FRIED NIGHTMARE.

FUMBLE AYA!

Funk & Wagnall!

G.H. IS GOOD TO GO

G.H. KIND OF NEEDS ME RIGHT NOW.

G.H., I'M GETTING IT.

G.H.?

GENTLEMEN, THIS TRASH CAN IS INDESTRUCTIBLE.

GET IN YOUR CHAIR AND GO.

GET IT TOGETHER.

GIVE IT A REST, HANK.

GIVE ME ANOTHER MINUTE.

Give them their halftime speech.

GO AHEAD, 'CAUSE YOU DON'T DESERVE TO LIVE

GO ON. TAKE A SPIN ON THE BIDET.

GO SWIMMING AT THE REC CENTER?

GO WITH THESE SHORT PANTS?

GO WITH YOUR MOTHER, YES.

GO, BILL!

GO!

GO! GO!

GO.

GO.

GOD, THAT GETS OLD.

GOGGLES MIGHT MAKE YOU LOOK COOL

GOOD EFFORT.

GOOD HANK.

GOOD LORD.

GOOD NIGHT, MR. AND MRS. HILL.

GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD QUESTION.

GOOD SPORT DOESN'T WHINE WHEN THINGS DON'T GO HIS WAY.

GOOD SPORT DOESN'T WHINE WHEN THINGS DON'T GO HIS WAY.

GOOD. NOW SHINE MY BOOTS

GOT MARRIED, HAD KIDS, RESPONSIBILITIES.

GOTCHA.

GRAB A BEER AND LET IT BURN.

GRACIAS.

GREAT. SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.

GROUND ZERO'S OFFICIALLY HOT FOR A WEEK.

GUAM, 1944.

GUESS WE COULD EMPTY THE TRASH.

GUTS.

HA HA!

HAD MY WHOLE UNIT PINNED DOWN

HANK HILL, YOU RUIN MY LIFE.

HANK HILL?

HANK, DON'T GO!

HANK, FACTS ARE FACTS, AND THE FACT IS

HANK, HEY, WAIT, DON'T GO

HANK, HOW'D MY HEAD GET SO FAT?

HANK, I CAUGHT YOUR BOY CARRYING THESE CHISELS AND SCREWDRIVERS

HANK, I JUST WANT TO GO TO SLEEP.

HANK, I'M REMEMBERING.

HANK, IT'S "MRS. PEGGY HILL" IN FRONT OF THE VOTERS

HANK, SIT DOWN.

HANK, THE BEST THERAPY FOR MY BACK

HANK, THE STRAW BROKE OFF FIVE MINUTES AGO.

HANK, WAIT...

HANK, WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOUR WIFE?

HANK, WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN

HANK, WHAT IS IT!

HANK, WHAT OR WHO WOULD HAVE MADE ME CHANGE MY MIND?

HANK, WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME

HANK, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO TAKE CONNIE TO SCHOOL, HONEY.

Hank: COACH

Hank: JUST LIFT NOW, OKAY?

Hank: LET'S GET MOVING

Hank: LOOKS LIKE IT'S HIS KNEE.

Hank: NO PEEKING

Hank: SHH SHH SHH...

Hank: SO HOW WAS REHAB?

Hank: THIS IS CRAZY, DAD.

Hank: TOUCHDOWN!

Hank: UH HUH.

Hank: WELL, I DON'T THINK WE HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT BILL.

Hank: WELL, LOOK AT BILL. LUCKY DOG.

Hank: YOU DON'T HAVE TO YELL

HANK!

HANK!

HANK!

HANK!

HAS NEVER EVEN TRIED TO TEST A BEVEL

HAS NO HANDS LEFT TO DO DRUGS.

HAVE SOME CHOW.

HAVE YOU BEEN TALKING TO DALE?

HAVEN'T WORN IT SINCE MY 30th BIRTHDAY PARTY.

HE ANNOYING LITTLE BOY.

HE CAN BARELY WALK.

HE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG.

HE DIDN'T FINISH HIS SENIOR SEASON

HE FOUGHT FOR YOUR FREEDOM IN NORTH CAROLINA DURING 'NAM.

HE IS A COMPLETE FRAUD.

HE IS.

HE KEEPS HIS ELIGIBILITY AND PLAYS THE NEXT SEASON.

HE LIKES TO LEAVE HIS RABBET PLANE LYING BLADE DOWN

HE LOST HIS JOB.

HE MAY ROT IN HELL

HE SAID HE'LL TAKE YOU BACK, BUT HE'S GOT TO WARN YOU

HE STILL HAS RED SHIRT ELIGIBILITY.

HE WALKED RIGHT OVER TO THAT DOCTOR

He was eating the jalapeno corn bread

HE WAS FIVE FOOT EVEN

HE WAS JUST TORTURING ME.

HE WAS LIVING IN HIS PAST, AND THAT BOY HAS STOLEN IT.

HE WON'T LET ANYTHING STAND IN HIS WAY.

HE'D HAVE OPENED YOUR SISSY CHUTE.

He'll be going for the touchdown record against Hentoff.

He'll capture the career touchdown record

HE'S BEAUTIFUL.

HE'S CRYING.

HE'S GOING TO TAKE IT BACK

HE'S GOT A JOB AT STRICKLAND PROPANE.

HE'S HANK.

HE'S JUST LEAKING A LITTLE MILK.

HE'S NO HERO.

HE'S NOT LIKE ALL THE OTHER BOYS.

HE'S POSSESSED!

HE'S SIMPLY BEEN INGESTING A LOT OF FEMALE HORMONES

Heart like a lion.

HECK, WE CAN'T EVEN AFFORD TO FIX A DENT IN THE GYM FLOOR

HELD MY BREATH

HELLO, CHAD.

HELLO, SPORTS JOCK.

Hello?

HELLO?

HELLO?

HELLO?

Hello. This is Peggy Hill.

HELP ME.

HER THIRD STRAIGHT SUBSTITUTE TEACHER OF THE YEAR AWARD.

HERE IS THE BEAUTY OF TENTING:

HERE YOU GO

Here's a topic for the Sports Jock:

HERE'S CONNIE BABY SITTING BOOK.

HEY DO I HAVE TO GO TO CLASS, TOO?

HEY, BATTER, BATTER, BATTER, SU...

HEY, BILL, WHAT'S THAT OVER THERE?

HEY, DO THAT THING AGAIN.

HEY, HOW ABOUT THAT TIME WE SNUCK INTO THE STADIUM

HEY, I SEE YOU GET NEW DEEP FRYER.

HEY, MAN, DANG OL', WHAT YOU DOING, OL' TRASH MAN?

HEY, MR. HILL.

HEY, MR. HILL.

HEY, MY PARENTS AREN'T EVEN ALIVE!

HEY, THAT'S GREAT.

HEY, THAT'S THE BILLDOZER GROWL.

HEY, WE'RE GOING HOME TODAY.

HEY, WHAT WERE YOU KIDS WORKING ON

HEY, WHERE'S THE PARTY TONIGHT?

HEY, YEAH

HEY! AAAH!

Hey! Now they're carrying him in

HEY! NOW, THIS GUY WAS SETTING FOOTBALL RECORDS

HEY.

HI, PEGGY.

HIGH ABOVE MY HEAD IN TRIUMPH.

HIGHLY MOTIVATED FIGHTING MACHINE.

HIGHWAY NINE OR SIX?

HIKE!

HIKE!

HIS NAME IS BILL.

HIS NAME WAS CARL MOSS.

HIS SHINS ARE PERFECT.

HIT THE SHOWERS.

HMM.

HMM.

HMM.

HMM...

HOLD ON A MINUTE.

HOLD ON, CONNIE.

HOLD ON, COTTON. I HAVE A FEW QUESTIONS...

HOLD ON! YOU FELLAS GOT ONE MORE MAN TO BURY.

HONEY, I CALLED THE SCHOOL.

HONEY, I THINK A LITTLE PIECE OF PLASTER FELL IN MY UNDERARM.

HONEY, YOU WILL CATCH UP EVENTUALLY.

HOW ABOUT SOME EGGS?!

HOW ARE YOU?

HOW DO YOU KNOW?

HOW HE CLEANED IT, TOO

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO KILL 50 MEN?

HOW THAT DANG OL' WORKS OUT, MAN.

HOW WAS, UH... MATH?

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE A FEW NIGHTS AT THE MOTEL ARLEN, MY TREAT?

HOW YOU'VE ALWAYS HATED MY FATHER?

HOW'S IT GO? UH, WAIT.

HOW'S IT GO? UH, WAIT.

HUB OF THE WHEEL, HUB OF THE WHEEL.

HUH, THAT'S A GOOD ONE.

HUH! THEY CAN MAKE A SAW

HUH! WELL, WHAT DO YOU KNOW.

HUH?

HUH.

HUH.

HUH. NOT IN THIS HOUSE.

HUH. WELL, THAT'S STRANGE.

HUH. YOU WEREN'T AROUND AT GRADUATION.

HUNGRY?

HUP. HIKE.

I ACCEPT THIS ON BEHALF OF EVERYONE WHO HAS

I AIN'T GETTING NEAR THAT CHILD.

I ALREADY DO.

I ALSO WANT TO THANK MR. DEEBATROVE

I ALWAYS WANTED A BOY NAMED HANK.

I AM A 12 YEAR OLD BOY!

I AM BAD BOY OF SYSTEMS ANALYSIS.

I AM HAVING TROUBLE SUPPORTING MY HEAD.

I AM HONORED TO SHARE IT WITH HIM.

I AM KING OF THE SCHOOL!

I AM KING OF THE SCHOOL!

I AM NEEDED.

I AM NOT A COWARD!

I AM NOT MOPING.

I AM OUTRAGED!

I am so sorry I cannot take your call.

I AM THIS CHILD'S NEPHEW!

I ASK THE QUESTIONS AROUND HERE.

I BEGGED YOU TO JUMP, PEGGY.

I BET YOU CAN GET THROUGH IT IN TWO DAYS.

I CAN EITHER TRAIN, OR...

I CAN GO ANYWHERE... IN MY WHEELCHAIR.

I CAN NOT DO THIS!

I CAN PLAY AGAIN?!

I CAN RUN THE WHOLE HOUSE FROM HERE.

I CAN SEE IT FROM HERE.

I CAN THANK THE ARMY FOR STRAIGHTENING ME OUT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND

I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

I CAN'T IMAGINE HOW BAD YOU MUST FEEL.

I CAN'T JUST PUT SOMEONE THERE LIKE SHE DOESN'T EXIST.

I CAN'T LET HIM VISIT ME IN A CIVILIAN CEMETERY.

I CAN'T LOOK.

I CAN'T POINT, HANK.

I CAN'T SUGGEST THAT, HANK.

I CAN'T! IT'S ALL RIGHT

I CAN'T. DROP BY DROP.

I CANNOT DO THIS.

I CHALLENGE HIM TO FIND ONE SINGLE MISTAKE...

I CLIMBED THE CLIFFS OF NORMANDY

I COMMAND YOU TO JUMP.

I COMMAND YOU TO JUMP.

I COPED CIRCLES AROUND...!

I COULD FIGHT FOR REINSTATEMENT

I COULD GET MY NIGHT LIGHT.

I COULD NEVER HAVE DONE ON HER OWN.

I COULD NOT AGREE MORE.

I COULDN'T GIVE THE HARDWARE STORE MY BUSINESS

I COULDN'T HAVE DONE THIS WITHOUT YOU.

I COULDN'T TELL YOU. HEH.

I CRAWLED THROUGH A MINEFIELD

I CUT THE UMBILICAL CORD!

I DID COME IN THAT SATURDAY.

I DID IT FOR MY GIRLFRIEND.

I DID.

I DIDN'T DO IT JUST FOR ME.

I DIDN'T JUMP BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME TO JUMP.

I DIDN'T TEACH YOU THAT.

I DO NOT KNOW WHAT SHE'S DOING IN THERE FOR SO LONG.

I DO REMEMBER WHAT I SAID TO YOU IN THE PLANE.

I DON'T AGREE WITH HIM.

I DON'T EVEN WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT.

I DON'T HAVE ANY MATH HOMEWORK, HONEST.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT CAME OVER ME.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SLEEP IN.

I DON'T KNOW, HANK.

I DON'T KNOW.

I DON'T KNOW.

I DON'T THINK BOBBY SHOULD KNOW ABOUT THIS.

I DON'T THINK THAT'S HOW IT WORKS.

I DON'T WANT TO BE ANYWHERE NEAR YOU.

I DON'T WANT TO DUMP YOU, BOBBY.

I DON'T WANT YOU TO WORRY ABOUT A THING, CONNIE.

I EVEN HUNG UP ON MY OWN MOTHER.

I FED HIM, WASHED HIM, DIAPERED HIM.

I FEEL... LIGHTER THAN AIR.

I FELL 8,000 FEET AND SURVIVED!

I FELL OUT OF A PLANE

I GET FIVE WHOLE MINUTES.

I GOT IT.

I GOT MY PRIDE.

I GUARANTEE YOU'LL LOVE IT.

I GUESS I'M TIRED, TOO.

I GUESS SO.

I GUESS THAT WAS JUST A LITTLE UNREALISTIC, HUH?

I GUESS WE'RE GIVING IT TO MR. DAUTERIVE.

I HAD TO JUMP OUT OF A PLANE FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY.

I HAD TO LEARN ABOUT MEGA ABSORBENCY.

I HAD TO LET HIM LIVE SO I COULD EAT HIS DROPPINGS

I HAVE A FULL DAY AHEAD OF ME: BOGGLE WITH NANCY AT 2:00

I HAVE BEEN DOING ISOMETRIC BUTT CLENCHES.

I HAVE ENOUGH SANDERS FOR EVERYONE.

I HAVE HAD A NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE.

I HAVE HAD IT WITH THE SPORTS JERK

I HAVE PACKED MYSELF UP

I HAVE THIS ONE STUDENT, KIND OF A TROUBLEMAKER.

I HEAR HIS MARRIAGE HAS GONE SOUTH, TOO.

I HEARD THAT WHEN GIRLS GET THE CURSE

I I DON'T KNOW.

I I JUST... I...

I I THINK MY WIFE, I I THINK, MIGHT BE DEAD.

I I'VE NO IDEA WHAT THE SCORE IS.

I INVITED COTTON AND DIDI AND THE BABY TO STAY WITH ME

I IT'S DRIVING ME CRAZY.

I IT'S JUST EASIER, OKAY?

I JOTTED DOWN SOME BASIC SUPPLIES WE NEED IN SHOP.

I JUMPED BECAUSE I WAS JEALOUS.

I JUMPED BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU SAID RIGHT AFTER THAT

I JUST BRUSHED MY TEETH.

I JUST TALKED TO RAMSEY.

I KILLED FITTY MEN

I KNOW WHERE THE ARLEN HOSPITAL IS.

I KNOW.

I KNOW. AND MY DAD SAID WE COULD CAMP OUT

I KNOW. I TOLD YOU THAT.

I LEARNED ABOUT GOLDFISH HEAVEN.

I like the yam biscuits.

I LOVE THIS TOY!

I LOVE YOU, RICKY! I LOVE YOU, RICKY.

I MAKE MORE MONEY THAN YOU.

I MAYBE DID ZERO TO ONE REPS IF YOU COUNT THAT LAST ONE.

I MEAN, "HOW WAS SHOP?"

I MEAN, I FEEL BAD IN A NEW WAY..

I MEAN, LET'S SAY I GOT STITCHES.

I MEAN, MOST OF THE STUDENTS WHO WANT TO VOTE FOR HIM

I MEAN, WHY DID I DO IT?

I MEANT TO TELL YOU.

I NEED A DOLLAR BAD.

I NEED SOME ADVICE.

I NEED TO SPEAK WITH MRS. PEGGY HILL.

I NEVER DIDN'T REMEMBER.

I never seen anything like him.

I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IT LIKE THAT.

I NOW PASS THE TORCH TO MY GOOD FRIEND

I ONLY HAVE THREE CIRCULAR SAWS.

I PASSED THE OSHA EMERGENCY MANAGEMENT COURSE ALL NINE YEARS

I PRESENT YOU

I REALLY AM.

I RUINED BOTH OF OUR LIVES.

I SAID THAT "FRAUD" USED TO BE SIX FOOT FOUR.

I SCORED FOR ARLEN?

I SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.

I SEEN THE MUG!

I SHOULDN'T EVEN HAVE LET MYSELF SIT

I SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT, RIGHT?

I SIT DOWN, BOOM ON MY LAP.

I STILL WANT TO BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND

I STRANGLED THE GUARD WITH A ROPE

I STRETCHED A RUBBER BAND TODAY.

I SURE AM GLAD

I TELL YOU NOW WHAT MY MOTHER TOLD ME.

I TELL YOU WHAT GOD, THAT'D BE EMBARRASSING.

I TELL YOU WHAT, MAN, LET ME KNOW, MAN

I THINK A "THANK YOU" WOULD BE IN ORDER, PEGGY.

I THINK I'LL SEND HIM A THANK YOU NOTE.

I THINK IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY FOR ALL OF US.

I THINK MY DAD IS NOT TOO FOND OF YOU, EITHER... PRETTY MUCH.

I THINK SHE'S TAKING A BOBBY BREAK.

I THINK THE BABY'S CRYING.

I THINK THEY KEEP IT UNDER THE SINK.

I THINK WE DO BEST TO REMEMBER THE WORDS OF MAYA ANGELOU...

I THINK YOU'RE SEEN AS MORE OF AN INSIDER;

I THOUGHT SHE MIGHT WANT THEM BACK.

I TOLD ALL OF MY STUDENTS TO BRING TOOLS IN.

I TRIED CALLING MINH AND KAHN.

I TRIED CALLING YOU.

I WANT HER FOR THE CARPOOL LANE.

I WANT MUG, TOO, HANK HILL.

I WANT TO WAKE HER UP

I WANT TO WALK!

I WANT TO WALK.

I WANT TO WALK. WHAT'S THAT?

I WANTED TO FINISH THIS CUTTING BOARD

I WAS DIDI'S BIRTHING PARTNER.

I WAS JUST WASHING YOUR... UNMENTIONABLES HERE

I WAS LAUGHING AT THE IDEA.

I WAS NOT LAUGHING AT YOU.

I WAS ON THE GROUND, REMEMBER?

I WAS ONCE ONE OF THE FINEST MOTHERS

I WAS REQUIRED TO TAKE IT.

I WAS TALKING TO YOU

I WAS TALKING TO YOU...

I WASN'T JOYRIDING, PEGGY.

I WASN'T WATCHING.

I WASN'T?

I WILL TAKE OVER FROM HERE.

I WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO CHANGE A DIAPER.

I WON'T LET HER FEEL ANY LIMITATIONS.

I WON'T.

I WONDER IF IT WAS LIKE THIS

I WOULD WIN THREE YEARS IN A ROW?

I WOULDN'T DUMP YOU.

I...

I...

I... I'M JUST...

I'D BETTER HURRY UP AND GET TO BED

I'D COME BY TOMORROW TO PICK IT UP

I'D HAVE TO CUT SOMEBODY...

I'D LIKE THE HALF POUNDERS, PLEASE.

I'D LIKE TO ANNOUNCE THE WINNER

I'D LIKE TO THANK EVERYONE WHO MADE THIS POSSIBLE

I'LL BE HONEST WITH YOU, DAD.

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

I'LL BET YOU'VE GOT MORE TOOLS

I'll connect you to her voice mail.

I'LL DOUBLE CHECK MY NUMBERS LATER.

I'LL EAT

I'LL GET RIGHT TO IT...

I'LL GET THE HOSE.

I'LL LOOK INTO THAT.

I'LL SEE YOU IN TWO DAYS!

I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW.

I'LL TAKE YOUR PLATE IN WITH MINE.

I'LL TALK TO CONNIE

I'M A PRE EDUCATION MAJOR.

I'M AFRAID THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.

I'M ALIVE.

I'M AN OLD MAN.

I'M ASKING YOU TO FIX AN INJUSTICE.

I'M BETTER OFF IN THE LIVING ROOM ANYWAY.

I'M BUSTING A MOVE TONIGHT.

I'M CALLING HIM "HANK."

I'M GETTING SQUEEZED BY SOME INSURANCE COMPANY PENCIL STAIN

I'M GLAD YOU'RE HERE.

I'M GOING HOME, DALE.

I'M GOING TO BAKE HIM SOME MUFFINS.

I'M GOING TO BE BURIED IN THOSE NAZZY STOMPERS

I'M GOING TO DO FOR YOU

I'M GOING TO HAVE TO SUSPEND YOU.

I'M GOING TO HAVE TO SUSPEND YOUR BOY.

I'M GOING TO THE LITTLE LINEMAN'S ROOM NOW.

I'M HEADED OVER TO THE TEXAS STATE CEMETERY.

I'M HEATING IT UP.

I'M HONORED TO INTRODUCE...

I'M HUNGRY.

I'M IN AN ENSEMBLE.

I'M JUST TRYING TO ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS.

I'M NOT EVEN SURE YOU WANT TO WALK.

I'M NOT IN THE BEST SHAPE

I'M NOT PEEKING.

I'M NOT SO WORRIED ABOUT HER BACK.

I'M NOT SURE HOW I FEEL ABOUT THE OTHER TEAM

I'M NOT SURE WE'LL EVER KNOW.

I'M NOT THE FATH...

I'M NOTHING.

I'M NOTHING.

I'M ON IT.

I'M ON IT.

I'M OPEN, I'M OPEN!

I'M REFERRING TO YOUR HUSBAND.

I'M SETTING A NEW WORLD'S RECORD.

I'M SOPHIA LOREN, HUH?

I'M SORRY I GOT COTTON CANDY IN YOUR HAIR.

I'M SORRY, DAD. I JUST, IT'S...

I'M SORRY, HANK.

I'M SORRY, HANK.

I'M SORRY?

I'M SORRY. DISTRICT POLICY

I'M STILL A KID.

I'M STILL AN ATHLETE.

I'M SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT IT.

I'M TALKING ABOUT WILLIAM FONTAINE DE LA TOUR DAUTERIVE.

I'M THE ONE WHO FOUND YOU, HEH.

I'M TIRED.

I'M WORRIED ABOUT HER EMOTIONAL STATE.

I'M YOUNG. I'M YOUNG AND ALIVE

I'M... NOT SURE.

I'VE GOT A NEWBORN SON.

I'VE GOT PEACH FUZZ AND A BIKE.

I'VE NEVER BEEN THROUGH THIS BEFORE.

I'VE TAKEN CARE OF THINGS FOR NOW

IF ANYBODY MAKES ANY DINNER

IF ARLEN GETS THE BALL AGAIN

IF GOD LOVED YOU

IF HISTORY TEACHES US ANYTHING

IF I ASKED FOR THEM, RIGHT?

IF I SHOWED EVEN A LITTLE BIT OF TOLERANCE

IF IF YOU GOT AWAY FOR A WHILE.

IF RICKY TIES MY RECORD.

IF SHE HAD FALLEN ON CONCRETE, MR. HILL.

If some young buck

IF THAT BOY DOESN'T MAKE IT IN THE NFL

IF THAT PART ABOUT HITTING THE DOCTOR IS TRUE

IF THAT POOR FARM BOY

IF THE FAT, BALD GUY WHO HAD THE RECORD DOESN'T CARE

IF THEY WANT TO DO THE DRUGS BAD ENOUGH.

IF THEY WANT TO DO THE DRUGS BAD ENOUGH.

IF WE COULD JUST GET INTO SCORING POSITION

If you don't want me to tell you, I won't tell you.

IF YOU JUST BRUSHED YOUR TEETH

IF YOU LOVE ME, YOU'LL JUMP.

IF YOU'RE DONE, MRS. HILL

IN A 55 GALLON DRUM OF SAKI.

IN A CHEAP MOTEL ROOM WITH YOUR SERVICE REVOLVER?

IN A LIFE RAFT BY TRAPPING RAINWATER

IN A MONTH WAY TOO SOON

IN DEFERENCE TO THE COMMITTEE'S

IN FACT, I DON'T EVEN KNOW

IN FACT, THIS IS SUCH A LITTLE DEAL

IN GIRLS' LIVES

IN HIS UPTURNED EYELIDS?

IN NOTHING BUT YOUR PAJAMAS.

IN THE BYPASS LINE BECAUSE, IF YOU DON'T HAVE...

IN THE LIVING ROOM IN OUR SLEEPING BAGS.

IN THE RECORD BOOK, AND THAT ASTERISK SHOULD READ:

IN THE SAME CHAIR, THERE.

IN THE STATE OF TEXAS, AND NOW...

IN THE TEXAS STATE CEMETERY

IN TWO MINUTES

IN YOUR WHEELCHAIR LIKE YOU'RE SOME

IN... OUR... SLEEPING... BAGS!

INSTEAD OF THAT POWER DRILL

INSTEAD, I WILL RUN AS MRS. HANK HILL.

INTO SEVEN SPECTRAS:

IS A WAY FOR YOU TO FEEL MORE POPULAR, TOO.

IS GOING TO BE LIVING WITH YOU

IS MRS. HILL HOME?

IS SHE GOING TO BE OKAY?

IS THAT A SWITCHBLADE?

IS THAT EVERY MORNING SINCE THE ACCIDENT

IS THAT THE BIONIC GUY OR THE WRESTLER?

IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?

IS THAT, WELL, YOU NEVER... KNOW...

IS THERE SOMETHING I CAN DO?

IS THIS A BAD TIME?

Is to head on down to the Arroyo Diner

Is your radio on, Bill?

IT AIN'T RIGHT.

IT BECOMES AS BRITTLE AS THE MOST

IT BLOW YOU AWAY.

IT DOESN'T SMELL IN HERE AT ALL.

IT FELL IN THE BIG JAR OF BLUE STUFF

IT IS THAT AN INFORMAL, "PRE ELECTION VOTE"

IT IS VERY NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN, KAHN JR.

IT IT'S OKAY, CONNIE. IT'S ON ME.

IT JUST SLIPPED MY MIND.

IT MIGHT NOT HAVE BEEN A PRETTY WIN, BUT I'LL TAKE IT.

IT SOUNDED SCARY, BUT WHEN YOU SMELL THE GOAL LINE

IT TAKES TO CARVE YOU A GRAND CANYON.

IT TAKES TWO DAYS TO SPRAY.

IT TEACH YOU HOW TO BE A PARENT THIS WEEK.

IT TOOK OVER 200 YEARS.

IT WAS 200 MILLION YEARS.

IT WAS A MEDICAL EMERGENCY.

IT WAS ALL LIES.

IT WAS MY FAULT.

IT WAS NINETEEN AND SEVENTY FOUR

IT WASN'T EXACTLY EASY.

IT WASN'T MY FAULT.

IT WASN'T WORTH THIS.

IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT.

IT WOULD HIT THE GROUND, READY TO ACCEPT YOUR REFUSE.

IT'S "CANDLE IN THE WIND" NOW.

IT'S A FORM OF LACTATION.

IT'S A LOVELY GRAVE, COTTON.

IT'S ALL OVER, BOBBY.

IT'S ALWAYS CRYING.

IT'S AMAZING.

IT'S AN... OUTRAGE?

IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT I KNOW ABOUT THIS.

IT'S BEING CRIPPLED OVER

IT'S CONNIE.

IT'S CRYING.

IT'S FAIL SAFE.

IT'S GOING TO MAKE IT SOUND LIKE I'M "BAD HANK."

IT'S HARD, BUT VERY EASY TO UNDERSTAND.

IT'S IN OUR HEARTS.

IT'S JUST SUCH A LOAD OFF MY MIND.

IT'S LIKE A TIRE FIRE.

IT'S LIKELY YOUR MUSCLES HAVE ATROPHIED.

IT'S NOT A PRETTY LOOK.

IT'S NOT FAIR.

IT'S NOT JUST MOSS.

IT'S NOT THAT DARK IN HERE.

IT'S OKAY, SON. THE BABY'S HERE.

IT'S PRETTY DARK.

It's Ricky Suggs coming in to break the record

IT'S RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU.

IT'S SO COMMON, IT HAS A NAME WITCH'S MILK.

IT'S THE BEST DANG FEELING IN THE WORLD.

IT'S THE GREATEST DANG FEELING IN THE WORLD.

IT'S THE GREATEST DANG FEELING IN THE WORLD."

IT'S THE WHOLE DANG SCHOOL BOARD.

IT'S WHITE.

ITCHY BOTTOM, MAN.

J.F.K. GOT NOTHING ON ME.

JACK SCHERMER?

JOKING.

JOSEPH MUST HAVE USED THE LAST PIECE OF MAPLE

JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!

JUMP! JUMP! JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!

JUST ACT NATURAL.

JUST DISRESPECTFUL, TALKIN' ABOUT...

JUST DO SOMETHING.

JUST DON'T STEP ON ME.

JUST FOR THE AWARDS CEREMONY.

JUST GET THE JELLY AND LATHER ME UP.

JUST KEEP THE BITTERNESS AND THE HE SAID SHE SAID

JUST KIDDING.

JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, OKAY?

JUST LIKE BILL DAUTERVIVE, MAN.

JUST LIKE THE OLD DAYS.

JUST PUT BILL IN AND LET HIM GET HIS RECORD BACK

JUST REMEMBER TO CLAMP YOUR BUTT JOINT.

JUST ROLLING OVER FOR ME.

Just sopping in cream gravy.

JUST TAKE SOME TIME OFF.

JUST TAKE THE PLATES, BOBBY.

JUST THE TWO OF US

JUST... WORDS.

JUST... WORDS.

KAHN IS AT THE PODIUM!

KAHN JR., YOU HAVE A P.M.S.

KAHN SOUPHANOUSINPHONE.

KAHN, WE HAVE NO NANNY FOR CONNIE.

Kahn: GENTLEMEN AND LADIES

Kahn: NOOOO!

KEEP HER STRAIGHT.

KICKED OUT OF WORK, KICKED OUT OF SCHOOL

LAST TIME YOU WERE WAITING FOR ME

LEAVE A THIN, PROTECTIVE FILM ON YOU AT ALL TIME.

LEFT.

LET'S CALL IT

Let's give them both a hand.

LET'S GO TO WHATABURGER.

LET'S GO, HANK.

LET'S GO!

LET'S GO.

LET'S GO. START CLIMBING.

LET'S SEE SOME BLOCKING NOW.

LET'S SEE THEM.

LET'S SEE... BICEP CURLS.

LET'S SHOW THOSE KIDS HOW WE USED TO PLAY FOOTBALL.

LET'S TAKE IT SLOW.

LET'S TOILET PAPER HIS YARD.

LIKE "WOOD."

LIKE FORMULA.

LIKE I DID AT LAST WEEK'S GAME?

LIKE ON OKINAWA, WHEN THE TOJOS CAME AT ME

LIKE THE DRUNKS DO

LIKE YOU MUMMY MUSEUM PIECE

LIKE, MOVE IT! MOVE IT! MOVE IT!

LIKE, WHEN CLARK'S CHAIR WAS SQUEAKING

LOOK AT HER.

LOOK AT HIM!

LOOK AT ME.

LOOK AT ME. I EVEN GOT THE KID'S MEAL.

LOOK AT YOU!

LOOK, I DO NOT WANT A BOTTLE, OKAY?

LOOK, I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING

LOOK, I KNOW YOU'RE DISAPPOINTED.

LOOK, IT'S MR. HILL.

LUANNE

LUANNE, COULD YOU GIVE ME A RIDE

Luanne: 951...

LUCK HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT.

MADE OF BRAIDED RAT TAILS AND RAN TO SAFETY.

MADE YA LOOK!

MAKE HER STOP.

MAKE SAD MOVIES TRULY EXCELLENT.

MAKING OUT IN THE TEACHERS' LOUNGE.

Man on TV: Aikman takes the snap.

MAN, THIS GUY'S GOT BAD EYESIGHT.

MAN, WHAT YOU DOING, MAN

Man: Tom Landry Middle School.

MAN... DANG OL' OFFENSIVE LINEMAN.

MAY 2, '45, DURING THE BATTLE FOR OKINAWA

MAY GOD HAVE MERCY ON YOU ALL.

MAY HAVE BROKEN MY SPINE

MAY I TAKE THOSE PLATES OUT OF YOUR WAY, SIR?

MAYBE CONNIE CAN STAY WITH ONE OF THE NEIGHBORS.

MAYBE I COULD BE A SUBSTITUTE TEACHER.

MAYBE I NEED A MINT.

MAYBE I'LL SIGN IT ON THE STOMACH.

MAYBE IF YOU WERE THE RICHEST MAN IN AMERICA.

MAYBE IT MIGHT DO US ALL SOME GOOD

MAYBE MOM JUST NEEDS TO BURP.

MAYBE THIS ISN'T SUCH A BIG DEAL AFTER ALL.

ME, TOO, PLEASE.

ME, TOO.

ME?

ME. I'LL TEACH SHOP, AND I'LL DO IT FOR FREE.

MEET THE GREATEST COLLECTION OF SOLDIERS

MEGA LO SCREWS? HANK.

MEN HAVE FOUGHT AND DIED FOR THE FLAG

MM HMM.

MM HMM. WHEN WE WERE KINGS, HANK.

MM.

MM. POOR BILL.

Mmm, mmm. I call that uptown good eating.

Mmm, that is uptown.

MMM... THERE IT IS.

MOM, I WAS REALLY MEAN TO BOBBY

MOM, WHY DON'T YOU GATHER YOUR THOUGHTS

MOM, YOU DON'T KNOW BOBBY.

MOM!

MOM!

MOM?

MOMMY'S LITTLE MAN.

MORE FLOWERS, MR. HILL?

MORE IMPORTANT, THOUGH, I THINK THEY MIGHT LIKE SHOP.

MORE THAN YOU EVER HATED ANYONE IN YOUR LIFE?

MORNING, HANK.

MOST PEOPLE NEVER GET THAT

MOVE IT! MOVE IT!

MOVE YOUR CAN!

MR. CHAIRMAN, I WOULD LIKE TO RESPECTFULLY SUGGEST

MR. HANK HILL.

MR. HILL OR HANK?

MR. HILL, COME QUICK.

MR. HILL, YOUR INSURANCE COMPANY'S AUTOMATED VOICE

MR. HILL.

MRS. FLORES IS ALREADY COMBING HER OWN HAIR

MRS. HANK HILL.

MRS. PEGGY HILL.

MUCH LESS A CHAMFER.

MUNICH, GERMANY?

MUNICH? RAT TAILS?

MY ARMS ARE TIRED.

MY BAD.

MY BOSS WANTS ME TO GIVE BIG TIME SPEECH.

MY COACH, GOD

MY DAD SAID YOU WERE GOOD!

MY DAY WAS INCREDIBLE.

MY DAY?

MY HANDS ARE TIED.

MY LEFT.

MY MOM SAYS WE SHOULDN'T BE ALONE TOGETHER ANYMORE

MY MOM TAUGHT ME NOTHING.

MY MOTION TO ADD "FATTY FATTY BOOMBALATTY"

MY NAME'S RAMSEY. I'M YOUR PHYSICAL THERAPIST

MY OLD UNIFORM.

MY PARENTS WON'T EVEN LET ME GO IN A CHAT ROOM.

MY THEORY IS, VOTING FOR A WINNER

MY TOP CAST AND MY BOTTOM CAST MATCH.

MY UNCLE.

NAH, I JUST SEE IT LIKE TALKING TO SOME OLD FRIENDS.

Narrator: The mother sings a gentle song

NEWSWEEK?

NEXT WEEK?

NICE SANDING, JOSEPH.

NINE HUNDRED FIF...

NINE.

NO CIGAR, GRIBBLE.

No doubt about it.

NO FAIR!

NO MORE BURNED HANDS, HANK.

NO OH. YOU THE MAN.

NO TAKIN', I'M 'BOUT GONNA CALL 911, MAN.

NO, BUT I MADE MY OWN RUBBER HALL PASS STAMP.

NO, BUT I...

NO, I REMEMBER NOW.

NO, I'M NOT ASKING YOU TO FIX THE GAME.

NO, KAHN.

NO, NO, IT'S OKAY.

NO, NO, NO. THANK YOU, DOCTOR.

NO, NOT EVEN IF ONE EXISTED.

NO, OF COURSE IT'S SAFE.

NO, PLEASE.

NO, SHE QUIT THE REHAB.

NO, SIR. YOU THE MAN.

NO, THANK YOU.

NO, THE LEG. NO, THE STOMACH.

NO, TOWARD...

NO, UH, IT'S A MULTI TOOL, BUT IT DOES HAVE A SAW.

NO!

NO! NO! NO!

NO.

NO.

NO.

NO. SHE LEFT FOR SCHOOL ALREADY.

NO. THAT'S OKAY, BOBBY.

NO. YOU HAVE TO GO AND BUY THEM.

NOBODY LIKES THAT.

NOBODY SPENDS SIX WEEKS IN A CAST

NOBODY'S TRYING TO TACKLE HIM.

NOPE. NOT SUCH A BIG DEAL.

NOPE. SET IT FOR 5:30.

NOT ANGRY, MAN, JUST VERY DANG DISAPPOINTED, MAN.

NOT ANYMORE. I'M TAKING IT BACK.

NOT THE GAVEL.

NOT THE SAME.

NOT TO BE MORE POPULAR OR TO GET INTO COLLEGE

NOT WITH RICKY SUGGS FEVER INFECTING THE PLACE.

NOT YOUR FAULT.

NOTHING THERE BUT GIRLS AND BABIES.

NOW COME AT ME.

NOW I AM MOPING.

NOW I CAN'T EVEN WIPE A BABY

NOW I DON'T HAVE TO BE TRAPPED IN THE HOUSE, HUH?

NOW I WILL ANNOUNCE THE RESULTS.

Now in the backfield for Arlen

NOW MOVE IT!

NOW ON TO MORE IMPORTANT MATTERS

NOW RAISE THAT FLAG.

NOW SHE'S GOING TO THINK YOU DON'T LIKE HER.

NOW SHE'S JUST THE WOMAN WHO YELLS AT ME.

NOW, 16 IS MY ESTIMATE.

NOW, BEFORE WE MEET OUR NEW ASSISTANT SWIM COACH

Now, don't tell me Sports Jock took Pickens over Kerney

NOW, EVERY MONTH A WOMAN HAS THIS TIME

NOW, GET OVER THERE AND SPOT ME

NOW, GO OUT THERE AND GET US A TOUCHDOWN, BILLDOZER!

NOW, HOW DO I CHANGE ONE OF THESE THINGS?

NOW, I CAN'T PROVE WHAT HE DID AT THOSE BATTLES.

Now, I was at the Arroyo Diner

NOW, I'VE NEVER DONE A RADIO INTERVIEW BEFORE

NOW, PEGGY, DON'T EXPECT TO BE 100% RIGHT AWAY.

NOW, REMEMBER, EVERYBODY:

NOW, TEACHING CAN BE DIVIDED

NOW, THAT DIDN'T TAKE A DAY, A WEEK OR EVEN A MONTH.

NOW, WATCH THIS.

NOW, WHY DON'T YOU HELP ME INTO MY CHAIR?

NOW!

O O OH!

OF BRAVERY AT GUAM, THE SOLOMON ISLANDS, SARDINIA AND OKINAWA.

OF COTTON HILL'S MANY ACTS

OF POPULAR SHOP TEACHER, MR. HILL

OF SNAGGING US EACH A PIECE OF BUNDT CAKE.

OF SYSTEMS ANALYSIS

OF THE BONES IN HER BACK.

OF THIS YEAR'S SUBSTITUTE TEACHER OF THE YEAR AWARD.

OF WHEN MY NEXT CHILD WILL BE BORN.

OFF MY COMMUTE.

OH OH!

OH, AND IRWIN LINKER.

OH, AND P.S.

OH, AND, UH, I ADDED

OH, BOBBY, GOOD MORNING, HONEY.

OH, BOBBY.

OH, BUT, SURE, I COULD BE A LITTLE SCARED.

OH, COME ON, GUYS.

OH, FOR THE LOVE OF...

OH, FORGET IT.

OH, GOD, YOU'RE ALL SMASHED UP.

OH, GOD!

OH, GOD.

OH, GOD.

OH, GOD.

OH, GOOD LORD.

OH, GOOD, THE BABY'S HERE.

OH, HANK HILL! WHAT YOU WANT?

OH, HANK, FIND A PICKUP GAME.

OH, HANK, HE'S NOT TORTURING ME.

OH, HOW MANY BOOTS DID YOU SHINE?

OH, HOW VERY NICE.

OH, I AM NOT USED TO TEACHING SO MUCH NON SPANISH.

OH, I DON'T HAVE IT ON ME AT THE MOMENT.

OH, I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

OH, I FEEL BAD I COULDN'T HELP RICKY

OH, I FEEL SO STUPID FOR JUMPING.

OH, I ONLY HAVE FIVE DOLLARS.

OH, I WISH SHE WOULDN'T FEEL SORRY FOR ME

OH, I'M SORRY, HANK.

OH, IT REMINDS ME OF WHEN MY SON WAS BORN

OH, IT'S GREAT.

OH, LOOK AND PICTURES.

OH, LORD, WHAT DID I DO?

OH, MAN!

OH, MAN!

OH, MAN.

OH, MINH! SHE DOING IT AGAIN.

OH, MY GOD! PEGGY!

OH, MY GOD.

OH, MY LORD.

OH, NO... DON'T TELL HER THAT.

OH, OKAY, I'M ON IT.

OH, PLEASE. WHAT DO DOCTORS KNOW?

OH, POOR CONNIE.

OH, POOR LITTLE BABY'S SITTING ON A FRESH GRENADE.

OH, SURE.

OH, THANK GOD. WELL, THAT'S MY RIDE TO REHAB.

OH, THANK YOU.

OH, THAT POOR INFANT BABY.

OH, THAT'S ALL RIGHT, MA'AM.

OH, THAT'S THE LIMO TO AIRPORT.

OH, THE BABY IS HERE.

OH, THERE IT IS.

OH, THERE'S STILL A BIG HUNK OF FAT ON THIS ONE.

OH, UH...

OH, WELL, THAT CUTS DOWN ON THE PAPERWORK.

OH, WELL...

OH, WHO AM I KIDDING?

OH, YEAH!

OH, YEAH!

OH, YEAH.

OH, YEAH. I MAY NOT HAVE MADE IT TO VIETNAM

OH, YEAH. YEAH.

Oh, yeah...

OH!

OH!

OH!

OH!

OH!

Oh!

OH!

OH!

OH! GOSH, THANK YOU!

OH! GREAT SET. YOU SHOWED THAT RUBBER BAND WHO WAS BOSS.

OH! UM, WELL, YES.

OH.

OH.

OH.

OH. BILL, IF WE FEEL THIS CHEATED

OH. HEH. I GET IT.

OH. HMPH.

OH. LUANNE, HONEY

OH. TA DA!

OH...

OH...

OH...

OH...

OH... BUT WHICH EVIL IS LESSER?

OH... CHUCK.

OH... COULDN'T YOU JUST GIVE HER THIS STUFF?

OH... GOOD.

OH... MARILYN MONROE, OR ENGLAND'S ROSE?

OHH!

OKAY, BOBBY, START TAUNTING.

OKAY, COTTON, YOU HAVE HAD YOUR FUN.

OKAY, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW TO TIE A TOURNIQUET?

OKAY, ENOUGH.

OKAY, EVERYONE, PUT ON YOUR GOGGLES.

OKAY, HANK, BUT WITH YOUR WIFE

OKAY, IF THE LOCKER ROOM'S ALL RE GROUTED

OKAY, JOSEPH.

OKAY, LET'S DO IT.

OKAY, LET'S SWEEP UP.

OKAY, LOOK, UH...

OKAY, MINH, MAKE SURE DIDI PUTS A HAT ON HIM

OKAY, MOVE IT.

OKAY, NOW

OKAY, NOW, SETTLE DOWN, CLASS OF... AUGHT ONE.

OKAY, PUT THIS OVER THERE... GOOD.

OKAY, SON, NOW YOU'RE JUST RUBBING IT IN.

OKAY, THANK YOU, SHAUN.

OKAY, THEN, I'LL JUST, UH, WAIT RIGHT HERE FOR YOU.

OKAY, THEN, SUZY.

OKAY, THINK "ONE PIECE."

OKAY, YOU CAN OPEN YOUR EYES.

OKAY!

OKAY.

OKAY. LET'S GET BUSY.

OKAY. LET'S HIT THE TACKLING SLED.

OKAY. THEY'RE OPEN.

Old time football.

ON A PHONE.

ON A STRANGER'S TOILET LID.

ON THE DANG OL' SPORTS JOCK AND CHAD.

ON THE PLANE...

ON TV'S DALLAS, 1984 TO 1986

ON WHERE THE STRAW'S GOING, PLEASE.

ONCE A WEEK FOR HOW EVER LONG

ONE OF THEM. A SUIT.

ONE WEEK AFTER A TORN A.C.L.

ONE!

ONE...

ONE...

ONLY FOUR DAYS?

ONLY RICKY AND I KNOW HOW TOUGH IT IS

ONLY THREE.

OOH, HOW MANY BEER CANS DO YOU THINK SHE CAN HOLD?

OOH.

OOH. I'M LATE FOR PARENTING CLASS.

OR "STRAW POLL," FAVORS THE PROVEN WINNER

OR "TWO TIME SUBSTITUTE OF THE YEAR" MRS. HILL.

OR A FENCE.

OR ARE WE WATCHING OUR FIGURES?

OR CAN'T FINISH HIS SEASON?

OR CERTAIN EDUCATIONAL FILMS

OR DID YOU THINK IT WAS A WATER FOUNTAIN?

OR DO YOU KIND OF LIFT RIGHT ON... ON THREE?

OR IS YOUR HIGHEST GRADE AN A PLUS?

OR JUST WAVING HELLO?

OR PERFORMANCE ENHANCING DRUGS

OR RE HANG THE LETTERS THAT BLEW OFF THE SCHOOL LAST WINTER.

OR SENIOR PROM.

OR STUPID POLICY THAT MAKES TOOLS ILLEGAL.

OR THE "INCUMBENT."

OUR REGULAR TEACHER ELOPED WITH THE LUNCH LADY

Our Sports Jock and Chad question of the day.

OUT OF MY SCHOOL.

OUT OF THE CHAIR.

OUT OF THE WATER IF HE DIDN'T GET HURT.

OUT THE WINDOW AND NEVER PAID.

PARTY AT MY PLACE!

PASS ME COTTON'S APPLICATION.

PEDAGOGARY...

PEGGY HAS A COMPRESSION FRACTURE

PEGGY HILL? ( horn honking )

PEGGY HILL. ALL RIGHT.

PEGGY IS MY WIFE, AND I WANT HER DISTURBED RIGHT NOW.

PEGGY, I'M HERE.

PEGGY, I'M SETTING THE ALARM FOR 7:00.

PEGGY, IT'S AMAZING.

PEGGY, YOU'VE GOT TO DO IT.

Peggy: COTTON, STOP IT.

Peggy: HANK, THIS STEAK IS SO TENDER.

Peggy: HELLO, BILL.

Peggy: I CAN'T. THAT'S OKAY.

Peggy: MR. CHAIRMAN, THE CHAIR RECOGNIZES

Peggy: OH, A WHEELCHAIR RAMP.

Peggy: OH, THE MATERNITY WARD CEILING.

Peggy: WELL, IT TASTES LIKE...

PEGGY!

PEGGY!

PEGGY! PEGGY!

PEGGY?

PEGGY.

PEGGY...?

PENDING MR. STRICKLAND'S APPROVAL.

PEONS ONLY GET THREE.

PEOPLE DIE, AND THEN MY PREMIUMS GO UP.

PEOPLE HERE AT HOME MADE DO WITH WHAT THEY HAD.

PEOPLE SPEND HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS AT A SPA

PERSONALLY, I COULD GO EITHER WAY.

PLAY SOCCER? NO.

Player ( coughing ): LOSER!

PLAYTIME'S OVER, HANK'S WIFE.

PLEASE DON'T TELL HANK.

Please leave a message.

PLEASE PASS YOUR BALLOTS FORWARD SO SHAUN CAN COUNT THEM.

PLEASE, CONNIE, CALL ME HANK.

PLEASE, DON'T TRY BAND AIDS.

PLEASE, HANK

PLEASE, SIR, DON'T TOUCH HER.

PLEASE!

PLEASE?

PLEASE.

POOR CONNIE? POOR ME.

POSSIBLY MORE THAN ONE.

PRACTICALLY SLAPPED HER RUMP, THEN AND THERE.

PRAYING AIN'T GOING TO HELP.

PRETTY HANDY WITH THE COPING SAW, NICE GUY.

Pretty hoop earrings, but I got a tear in my eye last night

PRETTY SURE.

PREVIOUSLY ON KING OF THE HILL.

PRINCIPAL MOSS IS HAVING US USE SHOP AS A STUDY HALL.

PROBABLY HAVE A SPECIAL TERM FOR IT

PROHIBITS DISTURBING A TEACHER IN THE CLASSROOM.

PROPANE IS CALLED LIQUID PETROLEUM.

PULL THE CORD!

PUSH!

PUT THEM BY THE SINK.

Quick pass over the middle to Smith.

REACH FOR IT.

REACHED UP AND PUNCHED HIM IN THE KIDNEYS.

REMEMBER THE TEN BAGS OF CEMENT

REMEMBER WHEN WE USED TO RUN WIND SPRINTS OUT HERE

REMEMBER, I CALLED THE DRILL PRESS.

RICKY SUGGS IS AN INSPIRATION TO US ALL.

RICKY SUGGS, I WAS SO SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR INJURY.

Ricky Suggs!

RIGHT THERE!

SAID, "YEP."

SAY NO! SAY NO!

SAY, CARL, I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND.

SAYS IT'S MAKING ME SOFT.

SAYS YOU HAVE TO LEAVE THE HOSPITAL TODAY IN 85 MINUTES.

SCRAMBLED.

SEE YOU IN TWO WEEKS.

SEE YOU TOMORROW

SET...

SET... HIKE!

SHE CAN HOLD A THOUSAND BEER CANS

SHE CAN'T BE A WOMAN.

SHE COULDN'T EVEN GATHER UP THE STRENGTH

SHE DOESN'T HATE YOU.

SHE HAS TAKEN HER FIRST STEPS

SHE MAY EXPERIENCE A SECOND CRASH

SHE NEVER EVEN GOT TO SEE HER FIRST TRASH DAY.

SHE RECOMMENDED THAT I STIR THE MACARONI WITH A SPOON.

SHE SAID IT.

SHE WAS MY CAN.

SHE WEARS TOP AND HE WEARS BOTTOM.

SHE WHAT?

SHE WOULD NOT HAVE SURVIVED

SHE... PLEASE DON'T TELL HANK.

SHE'LL BE

SHE'S GOING TO BE FINE.

SHE'S GOT ROOM FOR THREE MORE.

SHE'S GOT THE CURSE, AND I THINK I CAUSED IT

SHE'S MAKING GOOD PROGRESS

SHE'S NO LONGER THE GIRL WHO FELL IN LOVE WITH ME.

SHE'S STILL ALIVE... I THINK.

SHE'S THREE YEARS OLDER THAN YOU

SHH. EVERYBODY DRINK QUIET.

SHH. I'M NOT HUNGRY.

SHH... I WANT EGGS.

Shoot, I thought he was dead

SHOP IS THE FOUNDATION OF ALL LEARNING.

SHOP?

Should be fitted for a skirt and some of them

SHOULD WE ROCK/PAPER/SCISSORS

SHOULDN'T WE WAIT FOR AUNT PEGGY

SHOW US HOW A REAL HERO STARTS HIS DAY.

SINCE THE WAR ENDED RIGHT AFTER I VOLUNTEERED

SIR ARNOLD PREFERS DINING...

SIR, NO, SIR!

SIT HERE!

SITTING THERE ALL HIGH AND MIGHTY

SLOPPY?

SO CHANGE AND MEET ME THERE.

SO DID I.

SO DON'T GET JEALOUS.

SO I CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM?

SO I HAD TO GUT THEM FASTER.

SO I SNUCK MYSELF BEHIND ENEMY LINES

SO I WAS RIGHT.

SO NOW YOU'RE A WOMAN.

SO TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DAY.

SO THAT'S WHAT I ATE.

SO THEY COULD COME BACK AND GO TO STATE

SO UNTIL THE TWO OF THEM GET BACK FROM BRANSON

SO, ALOHA.

SO, ARE YOUR LIPS NUMB?

SO, CAN I ASSUME THAT MY LESSON PLAN GOT AN "A"

SO, LIKE, THE RIGHT THING

SO, TAKE HIM ALONG.

SO, THIS IS GOSSIP.

SO, UH, BOBBY, HOW WAS YOUR DAY?

SO, UH, SHOULD I HAVE THE STUDENTS CALL ME

SO?

SO... CONNIE

SOFTBALL PRACTICE AT 4:00

Some folks drink, but I find what's best for what ails me

SOME KID WOULD MAKE A RUN AT ONE OF MY RECORDS.

SOME SOME HANDS ON BABY CARE.

SOME THINGS ARE BETTER LEARNED FROM YOUR PARENTS.

SOMEONE HAS TO WATCH THE BABY

SOMEONE?

SOMETHING'S HAPPENED TO BOBBY.

SOMETHING'S WRONG.

SORRY IT WAS SO BORING.

SORRY, PEGGY.

SPITTING ALCOHOL INTO MY ZIPPO.

SPONGE BATH. BEDPAN.

Sports Jock, this is not a rumor!

Sports Jock: Hell, it would just tear me up

Sports Jock: Now, don't go saying the Sports Jock

Sports Jock: Oh, it'll be a battle, all right.

Sports Jock: Oh, yeah, he can play football.

Sports Jock. And Chad. We're back.

SPORTS PAGE.

Stereo: * 25 or 6 to 4 *

STINKY, BROOKLYN

STINKY, BROOKLYN

STINKY, FATTY

STOP CRYING.

STOP MOPING.

STOP!

Strickland: IS THAT A BUSINESS CALL, HANK?

Student 1: RICKY SUGGS!

Student 2: BOO!

Student 3: GET OFF!

SUBSTITUTE TEACHER OF THE YEAR AWARD

SUG... YOU AIN'T HELPING.

SUIT UP, BILLDOZER

SURE GRIP HANDLES, MULTI TERRAIN TIRES

SURE IS, BOBBY, AND ARLEN'S IN SCORING POSITION.

SURE YOU'RE MY BROTHER?

SURE, EVERYTHING EASY FOR YOU.

SURE, IT'S DISTURBING, BUT HE'LL GROW OUT OF IT.

SURE. MAYBE NOT TODAY, MAYBE NOT TOMORROW...

SYSTEMS EXPO MAUI, IN HAWAII.

SYSTEMS OR THE SUNSHINE?

TEACH ME TO WALK.

TEACHING BAND TODAY, ARE YOU?

TEACHING SHOP DURING WORLD WAR II.

TECHNICALLY, I THINK I'M ONLY A WOMAN

TELL ME AGAIN, SLOWLY. WHAT HAPPENED TO SHOP?

TERMITES?

TH THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I CAN'T FIGURE OUT.

THAN A...?

THAN I DID WHEN I FELL OUT OF THAT AIRPLANE.

THAN THE SCHOOL DOES.

THANK GOD I NEVER GRADUATED FROM HIGH SCHOOL!

THANK GOD!

THANK GOODNESS FOR THE MUD.

THANK YOU, HANK.

THANK YOU?

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

THANKS FOR LETTING ME STAY WITH YOU.

THANKS, PEGGY.

THANKS.

THANKS.

THANKS.

THAT A BOY.

THAT BOY WOULD HAVE BLOWN THE OLD RECORD

THAT CAN STAND IN FRONT OF A BAND AND KEEP THE BEAT

THAT COULD, UH, HURT YOUR BONES SOMEHOW.

THAT DOESN'T CUT SKIN

THAT GAL MIGHT HAVE WHAT IT TAKES AFTER ALL.

THAT I DON'T DO A TELEPHONE SURVEY

THAT IS STILL USED TO GUT MEN TODAY.

That is, except for the Arroyo's lime ambrosia.

That kid is uptown all the way.

That man is uptown!

THAT RICKY SUGGS.

THAT RUBBER BAND KICKED MY ASS.

THAT SILENCE?

THAT STUFF.

THAT SUGGESTION IS DENIED, MR. HILL.

THAT WAS BILL?

THAT WE WON'T HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT ANYMORE.

THAT WHAT THEY BEEN TEACHING YOU IN REHAB, HANK'S WIFE?

THAT WILL LOOK BETTER.

THAT YOU PUT AN ASTERISK NEXT TO RICKY SUGGS' NAME

THAT'S FROM HIS NIPPLES.

THAT'S GOING TO TAKE A LOT MORE T.P.

THAT'S HOW MY DAD BUILT MY TREE HOUSE.

THAT'S IT, HANK.

THAT'S LOOKING GOOD, BOBBY.

THAT'S MY NEW FAVORITE CLASS SHOP.

THAT'S NOT EVEN THE BEST PART.

THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT NOW.

THAT'S OKAY.

THAT'S OKAY.

THAT'S OUR FAULT, PEGGY

THAT'S RIGHT, DALE.

THAT'S RIGHT. I'M A HERO.

THAT'S SO UNFAIR.

THAT'S THE ATTITUDE

THAT'S WHERE OUR GOVERNMENT INTERS ITS WAR HEROES.

THAT'S WHY I BROUGHT YOU HERE.

THAT'S WHY I RUN A TOUGH PRACTICE

THAT'S WHY I'M HELPING HIM WITH HIS APPLICATION.

THE BABY HASN'T STOPPED CRYING SINCE IT GOT HERE.

THE BABY...

THE BALL WAS ON THE THREE YARD LINE

THE BILLDOZER

THE BILLDOZER!

THE BILLDOZER!

THE DOCTOR SAID HE'D NEVER WALK AGAIN.

THE ENGLISH KEY TO MARK THE BIO TESTS.

THE EXCITING THING ABOUT THE LAWS OF NATURE

THE FUNDING FOR A SUBSTITUTE SHOP TEACHER.

THE GRAND CANYON TOOK MILLIONS OF YEARS.

THE INCUMBENT WOULD BE ME, MRS. PEGGY WITH A "Y" HILL.

THE KID IS LEAKING OUT OF HIS CHEST!

THE LAST THING I REMEMBER WAS DECIDING NOT TO JUMP.

THE LEMONY SMELL.

THE LOOK ON HIS FACE RIGHT BEFORE WE APOLOGIZED!

THE LOOK ON HIS FACE RIGHT BEFORE WE APOLOGIZED!

THE MAN IS INSPIRING ME.

The new touchdown record holder!

THE ONLY MAN HANDIER WITH A COPING SAW THAN CARL MOSS.

The person you have reached...

THE REST OF THE TIME, IT'S YOUR OWN PRIVATE PLAYHOUSE.

THE RUBBERMASON 170L.

THE SALUTATORY, THE ATTENDATORY

THE SCHOOL BOARD WILL NOT AUTHORIZE

THE SMOKE DETECTORS WORK, KAHN

THE SQUEAK OF THE GLOVES

THE TEXAS STATE CEMETERY COMMISSION

THE TOILET SEATS ARE CLAMPED DOWN

THEIR GRADES ARE PLUMMETING EVEN FASTER

THEN I DON'T WANT TO CATCH YOU TWO

THEN I THINK PEGGY HILL

THEN TELL ME YOU WANT TO WALK.

THEN WE'RE HALFWAY THERE.

THEN WHY ARE YOU GOING TO EAT BUNDT CAKE?

THEN YOU WERE NEVER IN MUNICH!

THEN, YES, "COOL."

THERE WAS NOTHING TO EAT EXCEPT RATS.

THERE WE GO. OKAY, NOW YOU TRY.

THERE WE GO. OKAY, NOW YOU TRY.

THERE YOU GO! HEH.

THERE... READY FOR SOILING.

THERE'S A BABY CRYING IN THE HOUSE

THERE'S NO MILK COMING OUT OF THESE.

THERE'S NO NEED FOR YOU TO FEEL THIS GUILTY.

THERE'S STILL TIME ON THE CLOCK.

THERE'S STILL TIME. HURRY.

THESE MAY WORK.

THESE STUDENTS WILL BE TARDY SOMEWHERE.

THEY AIN'T GOT MUCH TONE, BUT GAMS IS GAMS.

They got served up last year.

THEY LET HIM LIMP HIS WAY INTO THE RECORD BOOK.

THEY MIGHT JUST RENAME IT "THE HILL TROPHY."

THEY ONLY GO OUT WITH HAIRY HIGH SCHOOL GUYS WITH CARS.

THEY SHOULD BE PLACED IN WATER...

THEY TOLD ME DOWNSTAIRS

THEY WILL LET YOU BACK ON SCHOOL GROUNDS

THEY'LL BURY YOU UP ON COWARD'S HILL.

THEY'LL JUST PUT THE TOOLS DOWN

THEY'LL JUST PUT THE TOOLS DOWN

THEY'LL NEVER ROLL OVER.

THEY'RE CALLED NESTS.

THEY'RE GOING TO BURY ME

THEY'RE LETTING HIM SCORE.

THEY'RE LETTING YOU IN THERE?

THEY'RE ONLY WORDS.

THEY'RE TOOLS, CARL.

THINGS CHANGE, HANK.

THINK WE'VE ALL HAD ENOUGH OF THAT.

THIS BILLDOZER'S OUT OF GAS.

This could be it!

THIS COUNTRY HAS EVER KNOWN

THIS IS A GREAT DINNER, MRS. HILL.

THIS IS ANTIBACTERIAL HAND GEL.

THIS IS NICE

THIS IS REALLY BUGGING ME, HANK.

THIS IS THE BEST SPEECH EVER WRITTEN.

THIS IS THE WORST VACATION EVER.

THIS IS WHY WE DO SHOP;

THIS MAUI SPEECH COULD BE MY STEPPING STONE

THIS REALLY SUCKS, MR. HILL.

THIS SCHOOL IS ONE

THIS SUCKS.

THIS WHOLE NOT WORKING THING IS GOING TO GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK.

THIS YEAR, NEXT YEAR, IT DOES NOT MATTER WHEN

THOSE PARENTING CLASSES ARE STARTING TO PAY OFF.

THREE VOTES FOR LARA CROFT, WHOEVER THE HECK THAT IS.

THROW IT OUT, I IMAGINE.

TILL RICKY BROKE IT.

TILL THEY GOT GOOD AND DRUNK, AND THEN I JUMPED OUT

TILL WE COULDN'T STOP THROWING UP?

TILT TOWARDS ME.

Time out for a substitution.

TO BE CONTINUED.

TO BECOMING A WOMAN.

TO BREAK UP WITH ME BECAUSE SHE HATES ME.

TO CUT THE UMBILICAL CORD.

TO EAT YOUR WAFFLE, HANK'S WIFE?

TO FILL OUT A HALL PASS?

TO GET BACK FROM REHAB?

TO GET THIS FAR.

TO GET WRAPPED UP LIKE THAT.

TO GO EASY ON YOUR SPINE.

TO HOLD EVEN THE FINEST NAPKINS.

TO IMMOBILIZE HER WHILE SHE HEALS.

To leave a message...

TO PUT ON SOME LIPSTICK, AND SHE LOOKS AWFUL.

TO RETAKE MUNDA AIRFIELD IN THE SOLOMON ISLANDS

TO RETRIEVE GENERAL MacARTHUR'S CORNCOB PIPE.

TO SEE WHO KEEPS HIM FROM KILLING HIMSELF IN THE BATHROOM?

TO SLICE ANOTHER PIECE OF PHONY BALONEY

TO TAKE MY NAME OFF THE BALLOT.

To the 20! The 10!

TO THE LIST OF UNACCEPTABLE HATE SPEECH.

TO THE SCHOOL BOARD'S ZERO TOLERANCE POLICY

TO WITNESS BILL'S SOUL SHATTERING COLLAPSE

TO YOUR FATHER!

TO, UH... WELL, I DON'T KNOW TORTURE YOU OR SOMETHING?

TOJO HAD A MACHINE GUN NEST HIGH UP ON A HILL

TOJO HAD ME COOPED UP IN A BAMBOO RAT CAGE.

TOMORROW'LL BE EASIER.

TOO COOL TO SING THE SCHOOL SONG?

Too much!

TOO TIRED.

TORN A.C.L. YOU ARE LUCKY YOU ARE NOT A HORSE, YOUNG MAN.

TRY THE BACK DOOR. IT'LL FIT.

TRYING TO PUT IT OUT ONLY MAKES IT WORSE.

TUCK THIS LITTLE NIBLET IN THERE.

TURNED HER INTO A HIGHLY TRAINED

UGH. HOW MANY COWS DO YOU PEOPLE EAT IN A YEAR?

UH HUH. AND WHAT SHOULD I WEAR?

UH OH.

UH OH.

UH OH. I DON'T HAVE THE BIO ANSWER KEY.

UH, BILL, I'M NOT TRYING TO MAKE YOU NERVOUS

Uh, Bill, our listeners want to hear about your record.

UH, BOBBY, COULD YOU, UH, GIVE US A MOMENT?

UH, CONNIE LEFT SOME THINGS AT MY HOUSE.

UH, DAD, HANK IS MY NAME.

UH, DO YOU THINK YOU COULD PUT THAT ON HER CHART?

UH, I DON'T KNOW. I WASN'T IN THE PLANE.

UH, I'M JUST AFRAID HE'S TAKING ADVANTAGE OF YOUR CONDITION

UH, JUST FOR A SECOND.

UH, LUANNE, I THINK YOU GOT TWO PEOPLE SITTING

UH, MOM, I THINK YOU'RE USING

UH, NOT STRICTLY, NO.

UH, OF TIME, EVERY MONTH...

UH, PEGGY, REMEMBER, THE THERAPIST SAID

UH, SON, COULD YOU STAND UP A MINUTE?

UH, UH, CONCENTRATE

UH, WHAT COLOR IS THE CAST?

UH, YEAH.

UH...

UH...

UH...

UH...

UH... OH, I'M NOT SURE.

UH... SO, UH...

UH... WELL, SURE.

UH... YOU GOT THAT EXCHANGE STUDENT

UM, I'M SORRY ABOUT BEFORE.

UM, IT'S JUST I... AND I...

UM...

UM...

UNCLE HANK

UNCLE HANK, DIDI'S HAVIN' THE BABY RIGHT NOW.

UNTIL DIDI GETS HER BRAINS BACK?

UNTIL THEY CAN TAKE CARE OF HIM ON THEIR OWN.

USING A SAW FOR A WEAPON MAKES ABOUT AS MUCH SENSE

VERSION 4.0, WITH SEAFOOD ALLERGY UPGRADE.

VERY GOOD, SIR.

VERY.

W WINGED IT?

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING.

WAIT.

WAIT. HOW MANY WAS THAT?

WAIT. LET'S SEE.

WAIT. WE FIGURED THIS OUT ONCE.

WAIT... NO.

WALK WITH ME, BOBBY.

Wants revenge for that butt whupping

Was about to get my record.

WAS IT MY TURN TO PICK HER UP?

WAS IT SMALL LIKE AN ANT OR CRAFTY LIKE A FLY?

WAS IT THE FIDDY MEN I KILLED?

WATCH OUT FOR THE BROWN NOSERS.

Watching Ricky break that record

WAY TO GO, MR. DAUTERIVE!

WAY TO GO, PEGGY.

WAY TO GO!

WE ALL PITCHED IN AND FIXED IT.

WE CAN HEAR YOU JUST FINE THROUGH THE BABY MONITOR.

WE CHANGED IT BACK IN '97.

WE COULD ALL BRING SOME TOOLS FROM HOME TO FIX THAT WINDOW

WE COULDN'T CALL IT "ZERO TOLERANCE."

WE DON'T HAVE THE MONEY

WE DON'T HAVE TO MAKE ANYTHING.

WE DON'T SEEM TO HAVE A BEVEL GAUGE.

WE GONNA BE WORKING TOGETHER ONE HOUR AT A TIME

WE HAVE A NEW ADDITION TO THE TEAM.

WE HAVE A VERY GOOD MARRIAGE.

WE HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 20 YEARS

WE MAKE A GOOD TEAM.

WE MAY NOT HAVE THEIR YOUTH OR SPEED

WE NEED TO TALK.

WE NEEDED A TOUCHDOWN TO WIN

WE PROUDLY ASSIGN YOU, BARRY JENNER

WE THROW FRISBEE.

WE WERE BOTH RIGHT.

WE WERE DOING CONVERSIONS ON THE OVERHEAD PROJECTOR

WE'D GET TO SEE BILL PUT IN THE GAME.

WE'LL GET YOU ALL SET UP HERE.

WE'RE GOING BACK TO REHAB.

WE'RE GOING TO DO THIS DROP BY DROP; ARE YOU WITH ME?

WE'RE GOING TO GET THROUGH THIS SOMEHOW.

WE'RE TOO LATE.

WELCOME TO MY CLASSROOM.

Welcoming her calf to a watery new world.

WELL, ACTUALLY KAHN, IT'S AN INJECTION MOLDED...

WELL, ACTUALLY, I WAS HAVING A LITTLE TROUBLE

WELL, ALL RIGHT.

WELL, AS LONG AS HE HASN'T GRADUATED

WELL, COTTON, OF COURSE, I DO.

WELL, DON'T TRY TOO HARD

WELL, DON'T UNWRAP THEM.

WELL, DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT THAT.

WELL, FIRST, I GOTS TO DIE.

WELL, GO FIX IT.

WELL, GOOD IDEA, SUZY, BUT IT'S NOT MY CLASS ANYMORE.

WELL, GOOD JOB.

WELL, GOOD.

WELL, HANK, YOU DID YOUR BEST

WELL, HE SEEMS OKAY...

WELL, HELLO TO YOU, TOO, YOU FLY SWATTING LOSER.

WELL, HEY, THERE, PEGGY.

WELL, HONEY, READY OR NOT, I HAVE GOT TO GO.

WELL, HOW DID MY DAD FIGHT IN GERMANY AND JAPAN

WELL, I AM TRYING.

WELL, I CAN'T GET TO HIM. CRAWL, DAMN IT, CRAWL.

WELL, I DO NOT WANT TO BE FED WITH A BOTTLE.

WELL, I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'RE SO MAD, HANK.

WELL, I DON'T MEAN TO BRAG ABOUT THE STEAKS HERE

WELL, I DON'T SEE ANY REASON

WELL, I GOTS A TELEGRAM FOR YOU.

WELL, I GUESS YOU DON'T HAVE

WELL, I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR ATTITUDE.

WELL, I JUST SO HAPPEN TO HAVE

WELL, I JUST SO HAPPEN TO HAVE

WELL, I SURE DO HAVE THE TIME.

WELL, I TOOK A DAY OFF WHEN BOBBY WAS BORN

WELL, I USED ONE.

WELL, I WISH I COULD STAY AND HELP

WELL, I WOULD SUGGEST YOU BLEED OUT THE EXCESS PRESSURE

WELL, I'LL STILL LISTEN TO THE TRAFFIC

WELL, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, I AM IMPRESSED

WELL, I'M GUESSING THAT WAS LUANNE.

WELL, I'M SKEPTICAL, BUT OKAY.

WELL, I'VE NEVER WANTED TO SAY ANYTHING

WELL, IF POSSIBLY BURNING OUR RETINAS IS COOL

WELL, IT HAS A FILE

Well, it looks like we've got

WELL, IT'S PRETTY GOOD.

WELL, LET ME HOOK YOU UP WITH SOME MORE SUDS.

WELL, LET'S GET TO WORK.

WELL, LET'S SEE.

WELL, MAYBE WE CAN GET HER IN AT AN ANGLE.

WELL, MAYBE YOU COULD USE AN EXTRA SET OF HANDS.

WELL, MAYBE, BUT ACCORDING

WELL, NOT ONLY AM I WALKING

WELL, NOW, THAT'S FUNNY.

WELL, OKAY, BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO TAKE TURNS.

WELL, ONE THING HASN'T CHANGED: KIDS NEED SHOP.

WELL, SHOULD BE CARNATION INSTANT BREAKFAST.

WELL, THANK YOU, BILL. WHAT DO YOU SUPPOSE THEY DO

WELL, THAT'S FOR MOST PEOPLE.

WELL, THAT'S GOOD, BECAUSE I HAVE NO IDEA

WELL, THAT'S JUST ASININE.

WELL, THAT'S JUST WONDERFUL, HANK.

WELL, THAT'S REAL GOOD, BOBBY

WELL, THAT'S TERRIFIC. I...

WELL, THAT'S THE PROPANE, CONNIE.

WELL, THE COUNTRY NEEDED BARBERS

WELL, THERE IS NO REST FOR A SUBSTITUTE TEACHER, LUANNE

WELL, THERE WON'T BE ANY SECOND CRASH.

WELL, THINGS ARE STARTING TO CHANGE.

WELL, WE "RED SHIRT" HIM

WELL, WE HAVE YOUR MOTHER TO THANK FOR THAT.

WELL, WE'RE OUT OF STRAWS.

WELL, WHAT ARE YOU SMILING ABOUT?

WELL, WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

WELL, WHAT IF HE'S OUT FOR 25 SEASONS?

WELL, WHAT YOU MAY NOT KNOW, DOCTOR

WELL, WHAT'D YOU DO BEFORE MATH?

WELL, WHO DIED? IS IT YOU?

WELL, WHO'S GOING TO TEACH THEM?

WELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL ME SOONER?

WELL, WHY NOT?

WELL, YOU BURNT MY BURGER, DIDN'T YOU, B.H.?

WELL, YOU CAN STILL HAVE A BABY.

WELL, YOU JUST SHAVED TWO MINUTES

WELL, YOU KNOW, CAN'T GO WRONG WITH SILK, MAN.

WELL, YOU KNOW, IT SOUNDS FAMILIAR

WELL, YOU PROFESSIONAL TEACHERS

WELL... HOW'S THAT NEW BELT WORKING OUT, BOOMHAUER?

WELL... UH...

WELL... YOU KNOW, HELEN KELLER WAS LARGELY USELESS

WHA... WHA... WHA...?

What a hit! Suggs is down.

WHAT ABOUT SANDERS?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SWATTING FLIES

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

WHAT ARE YOU ON YOUR KNEES FOR, WOMAN?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU CAN'T?

WHAT DOES THAT MATTER, MR. HILL?

WHAT ELSE DOES IT HAVE?

WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO HIM?

WHAT HAPPENS IF A PLAYER GETS INJURED

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY WIFE?

WHAT IF HE'S OUT FOR A COUPLE OF SEASONS?

WHAT IS AISLE 8A?

WHAT IS IMPORTANT IS THAT

WHAT IS THAT?

WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THAT FOR A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY?

What position did he play?

WHAT REALLY BRING US TOGETHER HERE?

WHAT SCRAMBLED EGGS LOOK LIKE.

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!

WHAT THE...?

WHAT TIME CONNIE SHOULD EAT, ACCEPTABLE READING MATERIAL...

WHAT TO EXPECT.

WHAT WAS I THINKING?

WHAT WE ALL BETTER BE THINKING?

WHAT WOULD MAKE YOU JUMP OUT OF A PLANE?

WHAT, AT THE BEGINNING OF MY CAREER, I DID FOR ME

WHAT?

WHAT?

WHAT? THIS?

WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU MUTTERING?

WHAT?!

WHAT?! HOLD ON, SON.

WHAT?! JACK WAS ALL FLASH.

WHAT?! THE SPORTS JOCK MAYBE, BUT CHAD?

WHAT?! YOU GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE, HANK.

WHAT...?

WHAT'S HIS NAME?

WHAT'S THAT, NOW?

WHAT'S THE USE?

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

WHAT'S WRONG?

WHAT'S WRONG?

WHEN HE CAME BACK FROM THE PACIFIC

WHEN HE GETS INSIDE THE HOUSE.

WHEN I CROSSED THAT GOAL LINE AND SET THE RECORD

WHEN I FEEL SO TERRIFIC FOR ME.

WHEN RICKY SUGGS CROSSES THAT GOAL LINE.

WHEN RICKY TIED MY RECORD, HE DID IT FAIR AND SQUARE.

WHEN SHE FEELS HER OWN LIMITATIONS.

WHEN SHE GETS VERY ANGRY AT EVERYTHING.

WHEN SHE'S HALF FULL WITH A THOUSAND BEER CANS.

WHEN THAT FALLS INTO THE WRONG HANDS?

When they wheeled him off the field

WHEN WE TAKE THE ROSE OUT OF THE LIQUID NITROGEN

WHERE COACH HAD HIS LITTLE FIT.

WHERE DID I PUT...?

WHERE DID WE LEAVE OFF?

WHERE I KEEP MY COMBS.

WHERE IS BILL SUPPOSED TO LIVE NOW?

WHERE IS MY DAUGHTER?!

WHERE IT LAND, THAT'S WHERE WE MAKE CRAZY LOVE.

WHERE?

WHERE'S BOBBY?

WHERE'S LADYBIRD?

WHERE'S MY NEW DEPENDENT?

WHICH BRINGS US TO... SANITARIA.

WHICH I TAKE AS A VERY GOOD INDICATION OF MY CHANCES.

WHICH YOU CAN PICK UP AT ANY PHARMACY.

Which, I might add, has stood for over 20 years.

WHILE I GET ANOTHER ORDER OF ONION RINGS.

WHILE I'M JETTING OFF TO HAWAII

WHO BROUGHT A CORDLESS POWER SANDER?

WHO CLAIMS WORKING TOO LONG WITHOUT A VACATION

Who currently holds that record

WHO DECIDED THIS SHOP COULD DO WITHOUT A BEVEL GAUGE

WHO HAVE SURVIVED PARACHUTES NOT OPENING.

WHO IS IT?! I'M OUT OF FOCUS!

WHO KICKS BAREFOOT.

WHO WAS HAPPY ABOUT RICKY BEING HURT.

WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT

WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT

WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT?

Who's here in the stands tonight!

WHO'S PROBABLY GOING TO COST US THE GAME.

WHO'S READY TO FOR A SPONGE BATH?

WHOA, WHOA, HANK.

WHOA! OKAY, THANK YOU, RICKY.

WHOA! SLOW DOWN, KAHN JR.

WHOO HOO HOO!

WHOSE ARMS WERE RIPPED OFF BY A THRESHER

WHY AM I BEING FED WITH A BOTTLE, HANK?

WHY ARE YOU IN SUCH A HURRY

WHY CAN'T JOHNNY READ"?

WHY DID I EVER BELIEVE HIM?

WHY DID I EVER THINK THAT I COULD WALK?

WHY DID YOU TELL HER THAT...? OH...

WHY DIDN'T SHE CRY AT YOU?

WHY DON'T YOU EVER THINK?

WHY DON'T YOU GO TO THE CAFETERIA

WHY DON'T YOU HELP YOURSELF?

WHY ISN'T THE BABY WITH HIS MOTHER?

WHY SHOULD A STRAW POLL FAVOR THE INCUMBENT?

WHY SHOULD YOU?

WILL BE LIFTING MY THIRD STRAIGHT

WILL RECONVENE IN SIX MONTHS...

WINGO! BUT YOU GOT TO CHIP IN FOR GAS...

WINGO! HA HA!

Winner gets a Sports Jock T shirt

WITH A 50 POUND ICE CREAM MAKER STRAPPED TO MY BACK

WITH FIVE SECONDS LEFT.

WITH SOMETHING LIKE THAT?

WITH SPORTSMANSHIP AND DIGNITY.

WITH THE FILE CARDS, SO, WELL, I KIND OF WINGED IT.

WITH THE WAY BILL HAS HANDLED THIS

WITH THEIR BEAUTIFUL NEW BABY THAT THEY DON'T EVEN WANT?!

WITH... UNDERWEAR.

WITHOUT ANY HELP FROM THE NURSES.

WITHOUT THEIR BODY GOING A LITTLE SOFT.

WOO HOO!

WORD IS, CONNIE'S AUNT FLO IS IN TOWN.

WOULD SOMEBODY CO...

WOULD YOU LIKE TO HOLD YOUR BABY NOW?

WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP YELLING AT ME?!

WOW, COOL.

WOW, LOOK AT HIM.

YEAH

YEAH, BUT GOOD SPORTS PLAY BY THE RULES.

YEAH, BUT GOOD SPORTS PLAY BY THE RULES.

YEAH, BUT SHE SEEMS SO HAPPY.

YEAH, BY SEPTEMBER, I WAS

YEAH, HE MIGHT HAVE MENTIONED THAT ONCE OR TWICE.

YEAH, I KNOW.

YEAH, I WAS THINKING THE NINJA TURTLES

YEAH, I'D SAY THAT'S AN ISSUE.

YEAH, MAN, I TELL YOU WHAT, MAN.

YEAH, MAN.

YEAH, PROBABLY BECAUSE SHE STARTED HER PERIOD.

YEAH, QUALITY PLASTER.

YEAH, SOME...

YEAH, UH, YOU KNOW

YEAH, UNCLE GOOD HANK IS REALLY SOMETHING SPECIAL.

YEAH, WELL, ONCE THE THRILL OF SURVIVING WEARS OFF

YEAH, YOU GOT IT.

YEAH! I DID.

YEAH! WE WERE CRAZY.

YEAH?

YEAH?

YEAH. MM HMM.

YEAH. NO, NO.

YEAH. OKAY.

YEAH. THE BIG YAHOO.

YEAH. YOU WERE A CHANGED MAN WHEN YOU CAME BACK.

YEP, AND YOU TIED THE RECORD.

YEP, CHIPPED MY SPINE ON THAT PLAY.

YEP.

YEP.

YEP.

YEP. I HIBACHI'D THE WHOLE SQUAD.

YEP. I'M IN CHARGE NOW.

YEP. SO WHAT'D YOU GUYS DO?

YES, HANK.

YES, I WAS

YES, I WAS.

YES, I WOULD.

YES, IT'S VERY REFRESHING.

YES, SHE DOES.

YES, SIR, I DID.

YES, THAT SOUNDS MORE NATURAL.

YES, THEY'RE PUTTING HER INTO A BODY CAST RIGHT NOW

YES!

YES.

YES.

YES. JUST BECAUSE I STARTED MY PERIOD

YO, MAN, DANG OL' BILL DAUTERIVE.

YO, MAN, IS DANG OL' 6:00 SHARP, MAN

YO.

YOU AIN'T GOT THE GUTS.

YOU ARE A HOSPITAL.

YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO BE MY MEMORY

YOU BOTH THINK BILL WILL BE DEPRESSED.

YOU CALL HIM "GOOD HANK"

YOU CAN DROP IT FROM THE MOON

YOU CAN GET THE RECORD BACK.

YOU CAN TIP IT, YOU CAN RUN IT OVER WITH YOUR TRUCK

YOU CAN'T TAKE AWAY A GROWN MAN'S NAME.

YOU CAN'T WEAR THAT TO MY HEARING.

YOU CANNOT ASK ME QUESTIONS LIKE THAT.

YOU CRAWLED YESTERDAY.

YOU DESERVE IT.

YOU DID IT, BILL!

YOU DID THIS TO MY SON.

YOU DID. THEY DIDN'T.

YOU DIDN'T MAKE HER JUMP.

YOU DIDN'T WANT TO, BUT... WELL, I MADE YOU.

YOU DON'T ASK ME QUESTIONS.

YOU DON'T DESERVE TO WALK AGAIN.

YOU DONE LEFT OLD GLORY AT HALF MAST!

YOU EVER MAKE FIVE MINUTE SPEECH, HANK?

YOU FORGOT MUNICH.

YOU GET RIGHT BACK UP ON THAT HORSE.

YOU GET TO THE TOP OF THAT HILL

YOU GO FIX IT.

YOU GOT FIVE MINUTES.

YOU HAVE YOUR LIST?

YOU HEAR THAT?

YOU HILLBILLIES CHEW ON THAT

YOU INCLUDED RECIPES.

YOU JUST GOT TO LET IT BURN.

YOU JUST GOT TO TAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME...

YOU JUST TRY NOT TO GET ADDICTED TO THAT MORPHINE.

YOU JUST WANT ME TO LEAVE?

YOU JUST YELL AND YELL OR YOU JUST CRY AND CRY.

YOU KEEP TRYING MINH AND KAHN.

YOU KNOW WHAT HELPED US WIN THAT WAR?

YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT TO DO, BOBBY?

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO?

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING, MAN?

YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE ALWAYS WONDERED?

YOU KNOW WHAT'S ODD?

YOU KNOW, AFTER YOU WIN SUBSTITUTE OF THE YEAR THIS TIME

YOU KNOW, BIRDS CAN BUILD THEIR OWN HOUSES.

YOU KNOW, I HAD A FEELING.

YOU KNOW, I NEVER REALLY APPRECIATED MY RECORD

YOU KNOW, I REMEMBER A FELLA IN MY EIGHTH GRADE SHOP CLASS.

YOU KNOW, I THINK THEY MIGHT LIKE ME.

YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT I'D BE SPENDING MORE TIME DOING

YOU KNOW, IF I WAS BECOMING A MAN

You know, if Ricky keeps up this pace

YOU KNOW, IF THERE'S A GIRL IN THE HOUSE.

YOU KNOW, IT'S THE ONE NEXT TO THE DEODORANTS

YOU KNOW, PEGGY

YOU KNOW, THE CARL MOSS I KNEW WOULDN'T...

YOU KNOW, THE PRINCIPAL COMPED HIS TICKET.

YOU KNOW, THE SPECIAL TIME

YOU KNOW, THE USUAL.

YOU KNOW, THE WHOLE FIRST STRING

You know, their coach should have Dauterive

YOU KNOW, THEY PLAY, YOU DANCE.

YOU KNOW, TOWELS, WASHCLOTHS, THAT SORT OF THING.

YOU KNOW, YOU CAN THANK ME

YOU LOOK SO TIRED, AUNT PEGGY.

YOU LUCKY I DON'T SUE YOU.

YOU MAY WANT TO SHORTEN YOUR BACKSWING ON THOSE CHECKMARKS.

YOU MEAN YOU WON'T

YOU MIGHT SEND ME HOME WITH A BOX OF BAND AIDS

YOU MIGHT WANT TO USE A ROUTER

YOU NEED TO RELAX, KAHN.

YOU OKAY?

YOU OL' MEAN TO GIVE OL' ONE, TWO

YOU PLAYED ON HIS TEAM.

YOU READY TO HATE ME

YOU REALLY FELL OUT OF A PLANE?

YOU RUSHED OFF BEFORE DESSERT

YOU SADISTIC SON OF A...

YOU SAID I'D NEVER USE?

YOU SEE

YOU SEE, IT'S A MUCH SMOOTHER GRILL THAN CHARCOAL.

YOU SEE, SHOP DOESN'T HAVE TO HAPPEN IN ANY SPECIAL PLACE

YOU SHOULD BE COMFORTING HER.

YOU SHOULD USE A MITER JOINT HERE.

YOU SHUT UP, YOU...

YOU THE MAN!

YOU THE MAN!

YOU THE MAN!

YOU THINK YOU CAN HELP THEM TAKE CARE OF A BABY?

YOU TOOK A DAY OFF?

YOU TOOK PEGGY'S BOTTLE

YOU USED TO KNOW THAT.

YOU WANNA JUMP OR NOT?

YOU WANT TO DROP OUT OF THE PROGRAM?

YOU WANT TO GO JUMP OFF THE BIKE RAMP?

YOU WANT TO KILL A NAZI?

YOU WANT TO WASTE YOUR TIME IN A REHAB...

YOU WATCH TITANIC ON THE RIGHT DAY

YOU WENT DOWN AISLE 8A?

YOU WERE NEVER IN MUNICH.

YOU WERE NEVER ON OKINAWA.

YOU WILL?

YOU WON'T!

YOU WORLD'S BEST FATHER.

YOU WORTHLESS...

YOU WOULDN'T LAST A DAY IN A JAPANESE P.O.W. CAMP

YOU YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.

YOU, YOUR WIFE AND THOSE FLOWERS ARE GOING HOME TODAY.

YOU?

YOU'D HAVE TO SUGGEST THAT.

YOU'LL BE BACK ON YOUR FEET IN NO TIME

YOU'RE A COWARD.

YOU'RE A HANDSOME LITTLE SOLDIER.

YOU'RE DOING JUST GREAT.

YOU'RE GOING TO BE SEEING EACH OTHER

YOU'RE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO BRUSH YOUR TEETH AGAIN.

YOU'RE NO F.D.R.

YOU'RE NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL.

YOU'RE ON THE FOOTBALL TEAM.

YOU'RE OUT OF THAT BODY CAST, PEGGY.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

YOU'RE WASTING MY TIME. STOP!

YOU'RE WEARING DOWN THE ROCK.

YOU'VE GOT MY CHECK. WHAT DO YOU CARE?

YOU'VE GOT NO CASE.

YOU'VE GOT TO DO IT.

YOU'VE GOT TO LEARN TO TRUST ME, MRS. HILL.

YOUR ARMS IS STILL FLABBY

YOUR EMERGENCY CORD!

YOUR FATHER NEEDS TO FIND OUT ABOUT THIS.

YOUR MOM IS ONE OF ONLY 16 PEOPLE

YOUR MOM'S GOING TO LOVE IT.

YOUR OWN DREAMS OF WOOD, PLYWOOD, PRESSED FIBERBOARD

YOUR WIFE IS GOING TO BE JUST FINE.

YUP, AND I REMEMBER HEMORRHAGE

ZERO TOLERANCE DRUG POLICIES AND LITERACY.

18 MONTHS LATER

20 BIOLOGY QUIZZES AND NOT ONE SMILEY FACE.

50 GALLON CAPACITY.

952... 53

YOU CHICKENED OUT. YES, SIR, I DID.

...BOBBY HILL...

...I CAN PLAY

...is not available.

...KEYHOLE SAW.

'CAUSE THE DOCTOR SAYS

'CAUSE YOU'RE WEAK AND LAZY.

'COURSE, SHE ALWAYS WINS, DOESN'T SHE?

'KAY.

"AISLE 8A."

"COMPLETE LIST OF PRIME NUMBERS."

"D." OH! DISCIPLINARIA.

"HANK HILL: FOUND DEAD NOT WORKING."

"HERE I SIT BROKEN HEARTED

"INTERS" MEANS "BURY." WAR HERO? WHO'S THAT? MEANS ME.

"IT'S AMAZING.

"JUMP, PEGGY, JUMP.

"MR. HILL, I JUST GOT MY FIRST PERIOD."

"PROFILES IN JEALOUSY." HA HA!

"STEPHEN AUSTIN."

"THIS RECORD WAS ATTAINED

"VACCINATION RECORD."

"WHY CAN'T JOHNNY READ?

( all chuckling )

( all groan )

( all growling )

( all imitating revving engine )

( applause )

( applause and cheers )

( baby crying )

( baby talk continues )

( beeping )

( bell dings )

( bell ringing )

( Bobby yawns )

( both crying )

( boys all talking excitedly)

( burps )

( car horn honks )

( cell phone ringing )

( cell phone rings )

( cheering )

( cheering ) HEY.

( chuckles )

( chuckles )

( chuckles )

( chuckles )

( chuckles )

( chuckles )

( chuckles )

( chuckling )

( chuckling )

( chuckling )

( chuckling ): JOKE'S ON ME.

( chuckling ): OH.

( chuckling ): Well, Chad

( clears throat )

( clears throat )

( continues retching )

( cooing )

( coughs )

( creaking )

( creaking )

( crowd cheering )

( crowd cheering ) WHAT THE...?

( crowd cheering) Hank: WHAT A COMPETITOR.

( crying )

( crying )

( crying )

( crying ): MY LIFE... MY LIFE IS... RUINED.

( crying and lip smacking continuing )

( crying continuing )

( crying continuing )

( crying continuing )

( crying continuing )

( crying continuing )

( crying continuing )

( crying continuing )

( crying stops )

( electronic feedback )

( feedback squealing )

( frantic sobbing )

( G.H. bawling ) * ...CAUGHT BETWEEN THE MOON AND NEW YORK CITY *

( G.H. crying )

( G.H. crying )

( gasping )

( gasping )

( gasps )

( gasps )

( gasps )

( gasps )

( giggles )

( groaning )

( groaning )

( groaning )

( groaning )

( groans )

( groans )

( groans )

( groans )

( groans )

( groans )

( groans )

( groans )

( groans )

( growling and grunting )

( growls )

( grunting )

( grunting )

( grunting )

( grunting )

( grunting )

( grunting )

( grunting ) HOO YEAH!

( grunts )

( grunts )

( grunts and growls )

( hocks and spits )

( honking )

( horn honking )

( horn honking )

( horn honking )

( humming )

( hyperventilating )

( imitates drum machine )

( imitates engine growling )

( imitates engine growling )

( imitating engine growling )

( incoherent mutters )

( laughing )

( laughing )

( laughing )

( laughing )

( laughing )

( laughing )

( laughing ): COTTON, PLEASE...

( laughing ): WELL...

( laughing ): YEAH!

( laughing ): YES!

( laughs )

( light music tinkling )

( lips smacking )

( microphone feedback )

( motor humming )

( mumbling )

( nervous chuckle ): YEP.

( panting )

( panting )

( panting )

( panting )

( panting )

( phone ringing )

( phone ringing ) OKAY, THIS IS IT.

( pop )

( pop )

( pop )

( raising an octave ): * ARTHUR, HE DOES AS HE PLEASES... *

( rapping ): * MY NAME IS * WHAT?

( retching )

( scraping )

( screaming )

( screams )

( shrieks )

( shudders )

( sighing )

( sighing )

( sighing )

( sighing )

( sighing ): YES.

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs )

( sighs angrily )

( silence )

( silence )

( slurping )

( snickering )

( snickering ): RIGHT.

( sniffling )

( snoring )

( sobbing )

( sobbing )

( sobbing )

( sobbing )

( sobbing ): OH, GOD!

( speaking Laotian )

( speaking Laotian )

( stammering unintelligibly )

( stammers )

( thundering )

( uttering baby talk )

( veterans booing )

( veterans cheering )

( veterans cheering )

( voice cracking ): WAS THERE DANCING?

( weakly ): HEY, HEY, HEY.

( whimpering sarcastically )

( whispering ): ISN'T IT AMAZING?

( whispers ): HONEY, MY SPEECH.

( whistle blows )

( whistling )

( wild cheering )

[ Mutters ]

♪ 'Cause we are the .. ♪

♪ ARLEN HIGH, WE HONOR THEE ♪

♪ DOOOW, DOOOW, DOOOW ♪

♪ DOOOW, DOOOW, DOOOW. ♪

♪ EXTENDED CLUB MIX ♪

♪ HEY, DEEJAY, EVERYBODY IS A WICK, WICK, WHACK... ♪

♪ MY NAME IS ♪ WHO?

♪ MY NAME IS SLICKA, SLICKA SLIM SHADY ♪

♪ No time for losers ♪

♪ THE BEST THAT YOU CAN DO ♪

♪ THE BEST THAT YOU CAN DO IS FALL IN LOVE... ♪

♪ THE LEGACY OF BRAVERY... ♪

♪ UH HUH, BREAK IT DOWN, UH HUH ♪

$6.95 FOR ONE STUPID BOX?!