1. Yeah, I really enjoy it when your brother and his wife come visit us. Cannot stand either one of them and find his brother to be an obnoxious idiot. 2. Me and my husband live in an area where it doesn't rain frequently, but when it does, we get a ton of snails. He would get sad because we'd see some snails that have been stepped on, so I told him that they were an invasive species so he wouldn't feel so bad about them getting smashed. 3. I once claimed to have made the sauce for a meal...