Honeymoon in Vegas (1992) Soundboard Edit

A smile she can't even see!

A year later, things with Betsy and me...

Ah... Thank you. I like it.

All right

All right. Why keep it a secret any longer?

And he appreciates you double when you come back.

And I'll let him? Give me a little credit.

And if things don't work out, we split up, you keep the money.

And sometimes, if she's off from school,

And you can't do a goddamn thing about it!

And your going away makes him realize how nuts he is about you.

Bally's Casino Resort is pleased to announce...

Because I do have an amazing story to tell

Betsy!

Betsy!

Betsy! Betsy! Betsy! Betsy!

Both, actually.

But I didn't, and Betsy and I took our fateful trip to Vegas

But, I mean, I play cards professionally,

But... ...individuals...

Bye bye. Striking resemblance to the first Mrs. Korman

Can I help you with any future reservations?

Chief Orman favorite is, of course, South Pacific.

Chris and Ally. They were teenagers then.

Come on in there. Let's go. Let's go!

Come on, come on, come on.

Come on, that's unfair. He didn't have $65,000.

Dental Health Associates. Jack, how are ya?

Did you marry him?

Doctor said they never saw skin like that, like a saddlebag.

Don't be infantile! I'm trying to make the best of this!

Don't take too long with the makeup.

Fives overjacks.

For my nephew Douglas's wedding on the 21st.

From Salt Lake City, Lyle Davis and Vern Poole

Get off me! Somebody!

God, don't let me land on anything sharp.

Have you seen my bag?

Have you seen the musical Grand Hotel?

He agreed to this, so he's got to be... what?

He wants me to walk around in her clothes?

He was a garment center guy originally.

He was so terrified of marrying you.

He's a man of great simplicity.

He's going to jump all over you the second he gets there.

Her legs. It's Donna.

Here they come!

Here they come!

Hey, chief.

Hey, Jack.

Hey, Mahi, will you pay some attention?

Hey, Niko, what's the matter with you?

Hey.

His son is going to be there. His granddaughter Tiffany will be there.

Honey, don't. Please, darling.

How you doin'?

I can't think about that yet.

I couldn't find you. I didn't know how to reach you.

I don't believe this.

I don't know.

I don't think that's fair

I gotta get on the next flight out of here.

I have to get out of here.

I know that look, man

I mean, it's not even close.

I mean, it's up there with...

I need to be alone for a couple of minutes

I said Tommy Korman, loud and clear. Come on!

I should've got her out of the sun.

I told you that to protect you.

I try, but I can't.

I want...

I was not looking!

I was with two fine looking women last night.

I'll be arrested? Put in airport jail?

I'll see it...

I'm gonna want children very soon.

I'm in the midst of an emotional disaster here.

I'm just sayin' think about it before you marry him

I'm just sayin'..

I'm not gonna die.

I'm not ready.

I'm sorry, but they only confirm what my crazy mother said about marriage:

I'm talking about us.

I've replaced Tony Carmelo. I didn't know if you'd heard.

If you don't do that, the word gonna get around Kauai so fast.

If you really wanted to marry me, you would've done it this afternoon.

It was about cleanliness.

It's currently cloudy with a chance of...

It's not glamorous work, that's the bottom line.

It's not just because you look like Donna.

Jack!

Jackson, what's the word?

Just a little louder. They might not have heard you.

Just get your ticket and move on. Get your goddamn ticket and move on!

Just take care of it.

Ladies and gentlemen Roy Bacon and his Flying Elvises

Ladies and gentlemen, the Flying Elvises

Ladies and gentlemen. For your convenience,

Listen, if you could just drop me.

Listen. It's right here, $1,000 dollars in credits,

Look over there.

Look, I have to make a phone call now!

Look, I'm getting very close with her, you know?

Look, Jack, here's the thing. I don't know why you lied to me about the game.

Look. All right. We gotta keep him away from here for at least a day.

Looking over their shoulders.

Ma'am, I'll be sucking on an exhaust pipe by then.

Made to the King's own specifications.

Make sure it's not him.

Make sure you ask approval to leave the state.

May I have your attention, please.

May I have your attention...

Maybe we could work out something over a period of a couple years.

Mom, no, no.

Mom! Mom!

Mr. Korman and Miss Nolan are where exactly?

My hat's off to you, kid.

Nah. I dropped the charges. I feel sorry for you, man.

Neither of us has any money.

No, I'm not ready

No. That's bullshit.

Of course I'm excited. What do you think?

Oh, no! No, it was like a game.

Oh! Then you gonna wind up lookin' like a well done chili burger.

Oh?

Oh?

OK.

OK...

OK... Look, I'll give you half a million dollars

One weekend, he said.

Only one to go!

Ooh, boy, that music gets the adrenaline going, don't it?

Or hanging around the... casino.

Our second Elvis, from Elko, Nevada...

Penthouse A is ready

Place your bets.

Place your bets.

Real good. Doin' real good

Rivers of fire streamed down from the volcano beginning around midnight,

See the thousand.

See, I said to him, How's the weather? in Hawaiian...

See, you gotta think about it like this:

Shit!

Shut up!

So why am I telling you all of this?

So, tell me, what are you doing in the lobby?

So, Tommy, you organize this for the hotel? The game?

Son, we're skydivin'.

Tell you what. Here. You just activated your line of credit.

That goes double for me, chief. There was a little mix up here.

That it's a disaster waiting to happen

That just doesn't help me at all, but I appreciate the thought.

That there being your auxiliary chute.

That's five to me...

That's good. OK.

That's what he owed you.

The cheaters and cheated on, sneaking around hotel lobbies

The family fun capital of America.

The game was legitimate.

The Kauai Club. It's about 20 miles down this road.

The last chute is open!

The man in the limo was Tommy Korman, the gambler,

The most hideous, unbelievable things to each other.

The wind currents are picking up!

Then I realized, I said, What, am I nuts? I can't marry him.

Then let's do it. I want to

There's 83 grand in there

They ain't nothin' in this whole wide world foolproof,

They gonna have to shovel you into a coffin

They have all these chapels. We'll just pick the most outrageous one.

They like freaky freaky all night long.

This is a panic attack.

This is very hard being inconspicuous.

This is, uh, Betsy's.

This man get plenty influence in this place.

This wasn't Donna's?

This... This'll be your room.

To New York with a bad feeling about Vegas.

To you.

Tommy, I thought we were playing for fun.

Two As. OK, thank you.

Us? Already it's us.

Vito's in the chair. He can't believe it.

Waka waka?

Was she vacuuming naked?

We got the five reflecting pools of Maaoma

We have a report from Connie Wong.

Weekend is over.

Welcome to Hawaii.

Well, as the King his own self said...

Well, honey, you know, I told you there comes a time when...

Well, I'm trying to make arrangements to get to Milwaukee...

Well, might as well go down in flames.

Well, no one ever...

Well, yes

Well, you're doing great!

What do you got?

What the hell are you doing here? We had a deal.

What, what, what?

What, you expect us to fly back and forth to Hawaii in two days?

What?

What?

When people make promises to Tommy Korman, they keep 'em.

Where you going?

Winds out of the northwest at seven miles per hour

With me, I'd have gone right from the airport to the chapel to marry you.

Yeah, so by '85, it...

Yeah, yeah, sure. I love these little planes. They're great.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Absolutely.

Yeah. Hi. This is Jack Singer in the Ali Baba Suite.

Yeah. I'm fine.

Yeah. Right up here about a mile and a half.

Yeah. Who knew?

Yellow, then red. Yellow, then red.

Yellow, then red. Yellow, then red. Yellow, then red. Yellow, then red.

Yep. Home, sweet home.

Yes.

Yoo hoo! Can I get a room?

You brought me to Las Vegas, and you turned me into a whore, Jack!

You can only fly on a Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday...

You don't know what it's like. You don't know what it's like...

You know, we have a...

You like this, Jack?

You look... You know what I used to call Donna? Perry Mason.

You lose it, it's on the hotel. You win it, you pay it back. Fair?

You OK?

You ready, Zeke?

You want Georgetown, you gotta give three.

You went in there with $500. We had this whole discussion.

You were looking for a way to get out of this.

You're kidding me! You're in a Hawaiian clink?

You're pissin' your life away

You're skydiving?

You've seen them together? Your wife and Mr. Tyson?

Your answer...

All eyes to the sky! Elvis!

Ambivalent? Yeah. Right.

Are you out of your mind? I said you wouldn't do it.

Can I hold you? Yes.

Do you have a solution? I do

Everybody here is so friendly

Frankie Cargo. Give him a phone call.

I dreamt about her again last night. Was she naked again?

I just haven't been able to marry her. Milton moved out?

I was just kidding

I'll be up in the room. OK.

I'm in love with you. And I'm in love with you.

Is that what you really said? Of course

Jack, please. It's not just another excuse.

Just..

Leave me alone! Hi, Bob.

Miss, stay back. Please.

No? No!

OK. Goodbye.

Pleasure to meet you. Nahoo, Betsy. See you.

Shit! Excellent!

Thanks very much. Are you a friend of Dad's or Betsy's?

That was some fighter. Yeah, that was some fighter.

The doctor said... Screw the doctor.

There are the kids. How far is Mount Kilauea from here?

Tommy, we have a small problem. Oh, yeah?

Vito, you believe that? Uh uh. Uh uh.

Well, everybody loves that one, chief. Oh, everybody

What? And I believed him.

When I think of the two of 'em! All right. Calm down. Calm down.

You don't believe me either! Of course I believe you.

You got this in the mail? Under my door at home

You look great. How you doing? Real good

...and I'll raise you ten.

...and...

...ever was as crazy about you as I am.

...Romeo and Juliet, George and Gracie... All the big ones

...when the beeper goes off. Thanks.

...your girlfriend for the weekend.

♪ Falling in love with you...

♪ On the wind

♪ Some things was meant to be

♪ Take my hand

♪ Take my whole life too

♪ Talk about things you like to do

♪ Will call you