Alvy Singer
Alvy, that was the show. Everything is fine. They found a replacement
And I'm getting my chronic Los Angeles nausea again.
And the father with the Ben Shahn drawings..
And the miserable is everyone else.
And they're talking swap meets and boat basins
And those who couldn't do anything, I think, were assigned to our school.
And why are you following me around? We should call this relationship quits
Aren't you ashamed to pontificate like that?
Be nice to the host, because he's publishing my book
Because they don't throw garbage away. They make it into TV shows
Because you get pleasure in every part of your body when I touch it
Better than either of my marriages.
Bugs are..
But it's like a free floating life raft that we know that we're not married
But you're adding fake laughs
Could make me be true
Defend him!
Dinner dates and flowers
Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.
Don't tell me you're jealous?
Egad, here he comes.
Every time anything out of the ordinary happens, you think I have my period
For God sakes, Alvy, even Freud speaks of a latency period!
Geez, I don't know. I wasn't..
God, what a dumb thing to say
Greatest Fascist Dictator: Adolph Hitler.
Having you
He thinks he's a chicken."
He was my father's friend. He was always bothering me when I was a kid.
He's been depressed
Head on into the oncoming car
Hey, Max! What's that?
I did Shakespeare in the park. I got mugged.
I don't feel well.
I don't know why they would have me at this kind of rally...
I don't know. This is strange to me.
I don't understand
I don't want to go out with other women.
I forgot my mantra.
I guess it's mine.
I have to ask you a question. Don't go any further
I know it's hard. Yeah
I like to get all points of view
I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me
I meet a lot of jerks, too
I put on soft music and my red light bulb.
I think I'm going to be the balding, virile type...
I think you would have been happy, because I really asserted myself
I told her my dream, and then I cried.
I tried everything.
I used to be a heroin addict, now I'm a methadone addict
I want to remain friends.
I was 4 P.
I would leave out the men's room attendant
I'll get it. Concentrate, will ya?
I'm cool
I've got to see a picture exactly from start to finish, 'cause I'm anal.
In my dream, Frank Sinatra is holding this pillow across my face...
Intensive care ward. My God!
It doesn't make sense!
It's better if we just said good bye, once and for all.
It's funny. I'm not a morose type. I'm not a depressive character.
It's supposed to
Just give me the license, please.
Kill it! What's wrong with you?
Like marijuana?
Listen, I want you to come back here.
Listen, listen
Love fades. God, that's a depressing thought.
Lyndon Johnson is a politician!
Max, if we lived in California, we could play outdoors every day in the sun.
Maybe I should take "Introduction to the Novel
My accountant will write it off as a tax deduction. I'll pay for it.
My father ran the bumper car concession
No, I don't think they're going to hate you at all. Contrary
No, I was going to take a cab
No, I was never to EST
Not "Did you eat?" but "Jew eat?" You get it?
Oh, God, Annie
Oh, I'm going uptown, too
Oh, you see...
Okay, it's quiet now. We can get started again.
On my agent's advice, I sold out and am going to do a TV appearance.
On the road at night...
Photography's interesting because..
Possibly working together.
Probably met by answering an ad in the New York Review of Books
Seems like
She had moved back to New York. She was living in Soho with some guy
She was too busy getting ****d by Cossacks
Sixteen year olds.
So I feel guilty if I don't sleep with him.
So the audience was a tad restless.
Still, you need aesthetic guidelines to put it in social perspective.
Than there were to see the Dylan concert.
Thanks, honey.
That I don't look like a funny guy like some of the guys
That Randolph Hunt! You remember Randy Hunt, Annie.
That's my dad, that's Father, and that's my brother, Duane
The hospital?
The incredible thing is, I'm paying for her analysis..
The medium enters in as a condition of the art form itself
The only word to know is 'John Dark'. It means the light's out in the bathroom.
Then she mentioned penis envy. Do you know about that?
There are people out there from the New Yorker magazine!
There were many men interested in you?
There's a spider in the bathroom.
There's the winner of the Truman Capote look alike contest.
They scream at that
They're sort of giving it a chance romantically.
This always happens to me. Quick! Get a broom!
This guy's on television. Alvy Singer, right? Am I right?
This somebody who
To have to listen to Maurice Chevalier sing so much.
We can sit and talk. Not a big deal.
We should have gotten steaks, 'cause they don't have legs and run around
We'll do it another time. If you're on the coast, we'll get together there.
Well, I'm going to get a cigarette, okay?
Well, to me... I mean... It's all instinctive
Well, you look nice.
Well...
Were you? I was at an Alice Cooper thing...
What an asshole
What I wouldn't give for a large sock with horse manure in it.
What the hell? It would be nice having company. I hate driving alone
What thing?
What's your name?
When we first started going out, we had sex constantly
While we're talking, we could be inside.
Yeah. Jealous? A little bit. Like Medea.
Yes, she does.
You guys are wearing white. It must be in the stars.
You have to ask nicely, because I've had a rough day. My girlfriend...
You should smoke some of this. You'd be off the couch in no time
You were very hot for Allison at first
You're here in Brooklyn. Brooklyn is not expanding!
You're like New York City. You're just this person.
15? Nah, come on! Yeah? Really?
Alvy, I... What?
Are you? Yeah
But you guys are still New Yorkers. Yeah, I love it there.
Give us a break. It's Christmas
Has the picture started? Two minutes ago
He was creepy. Yeah!
He's a jerk for one thing. He graduated Harvard.
How did this personality come about? I was very charming.
I can't find any reason for this
I didn't follow you. You followed me!
I know it's small. And it's got bad plumbing and bugs.
I'm home! How'd it go?
I'm the comedian. Oh, comedian.
It's an important issue. You're incapable of enjoying life.
Suddenly he can't do anything. Why are you depressed, Alvy?
Then you know who lived here? Trigger
What am I, your son? I came over for... I've got the good chocolate.
What is this anyway? Check it out.
Who's persecuting? She stole! So? We can afford it.
You got black soap? It's for my complexion.
You're driving a tad rapidly. Don't worry. I'm a very good driver.
You're putting on two comics in a row? Why not?