Annie Hall (1977) Edit

A few.

A large vibrating egg.

A little bigger.

A little louder. I think one of them may have missed it.

A little on the androgynous side.

A lot of beautiful women. It was fun to flirt.

A year ago we were in love.

About a group of pituitary cases trying to stuff a ball through a hoop?

Acting is like an exploration of the soul. It's very religious.

Adult education is a wonderful thing!

Adult education is junk. The professors are phony. How can you do it?

Aesthetic criteria? You mean whether it's a good photo or not?

After all the serious talks and passionate moments...

After that, it got late and we both had to go.

Ah, let him drop dead. Who needs his business?

Air miles. Do you know what that does to my stomach?

All over the country, people are desperate for food.

All right, forget it. Aren't you going to be late for meeting Annie?

All that Juliet of the Spirits or Satyricon.

All this happened the first hour? That's amazing.

Alvy Singer. Thanks very much for everything.

Alvy, do you remember where I put my drawing pad?

Alvy, it'll be wonderful. Oh, lovely!

Alvy, let's face it.

Alvy, what is so fascinating...

Alvy, you were just great. I'm not kidding.

Alvy, you're the one who never wanted to make a real commitment.

An emergency, a tidal wave, an earthquake.

And a first aid kit and fire extinguisher.

And a plate of mashed yeast.

And all the poetry books are mine.

And even be glad

And even develop photographs if we want to.

And get more in touch with my feelings and all that crap.

And gradually you get old and die. It's important to make an effort sometimes.

And he can come and kill the spider.

And Henrietta Farrell, Miss Perfect all the time.

And how much fun it was just knowing her.

And I can't breathe.

And I think what we've got on our hands is a dead shark.

And I thought of that old joke.

And I trust her, because my analyst recommended her.

And I was thrown out of NYU my freshman year...

And if you kill yourself, they make you pay for the sessions you miss.

And it's all over much too quickly.

And it's still a thrill

And Ivan Ackerman, always the wrong answer. Always!

And just kicked around old times.

And my relationship with my brother.

And nothing interesting to say.

And now they're ahead two points.

And over the most ridiculous things.

And Randolph Hunt was drunk as usual.

And seeing you there With a smile on your face

And she aches just like a woman...

And she makes love just like a woman.

And the police said conclusively that it was an exit wound.

And the roller skates.

And the women are like in Playboy, but they can move their arms and legs.

And then a big hand.

And those who can't teach, teach gym."

And took an overdose of mah jongg tiles.

And tried to take my pants off over my head.

And under his breath he said, "Jew."

And we're going to meet Jack and Angelica for a drink.

And we're invited to a big Christmas party.

And you're the worst driver I've ever seen in my life.

Ann tells us you've been seeing a psychiatrist for 15 years.

Annie and I broke up, and I still can't get my mind around that.

Annie and I had lunch sometime after that...

Annie, Gram and I. Got some nice picture frames.

Annie, there's a big lobster behind the refrigerator.

Annie's mother is really beautiful.

Anyplace. Europe. Anyplace. Asia.

Anyway, so George is standing in line...

Are we driving through plutonium?

Are you 12 years old? That's one of your Chippewa Falls expressions.

Are you busy Friday night?

Are you going with a right wing rock and roll star?

Are you joining a minstrel show?

Are you joking or what?

Are you on television?

Are you recording? Are you with any label?

Are you saying you're not coming back to New York with me?

Are you? The 12:00 show is completely different than the 9:00.

Around you

Around you

As Balzac said, "There goes another novel."

As opposed to the distinguished gray.

Because he was shell shocked in the first World War.

Because I think you should read them instead of that cat book.

Because I turned 40, and I guess I'm going through a life crisis.

Because I was walking a block behind staring at you? That's not following.

Because I'm always tense when I'm playing a college.

Because I've got a temperature...

Because in the dream, I break Sinatra's glasses.

Because it's an important issue.

Because it's real difficult in life.

Because the union always gave George this free turkey at Christmastime...

Because then when he sang, it was in this real high pitch voice.

Because while you two are doing that, I'm going to do some drawing.

Because you don't think I'm smart enough.

Black soap. She used to wash her face 800 times a day with black soap.

But do you love me? That's the key question.

But I approved it immediately.

But I gotta be really talented. Material's got to be sensational for me.

But I guess we keep going through it...

But I swear I was brought up underneath the roller coaster...

But I want the whole thing!

But I was in analysis with a strict Freudian.

But I'm balding slightly on top. That's about the worst you can say about me.

But if I do sleep with him, it's like I'm going against my own feelings.

But if there was a second assassin...

But it appears originally in Freud's Wit and lts Relation to the Unconscious.

But it doesn't make any sense. He drove past the book depository...

But it was great seeing Annie again.

But no presents until midnight.

But nobody laughs, because the jokes aren't funny.

But she breaks just like a little girl."

But she's colored. The colored have enough trouble!

But she's the one, is she ever. I'm telling you.

But Tessie was always the one with personality.

But the thing is he falls asleep, and he never wakes up.

But there's ritual, religious cult murders.

But, on the other hand, the body doesn't lie as we now know.

Bye.

Can I confess something?

Can I show you something? I found this in the apartment.

Can we not argue in front of everybody? I get embarrassed.

Can we not debate this on the telephone...

Can you imagine the mathematical possibilities of that?

Central Park West, Brandeis University, socialist summer camps...

Central Park's turning green.

Charlie Chaplin, right before his un American thing.

Charlie, give me a good laugh here.

Check please.

Cleveland Cavaliers losing to the New York Knicks.

College audiences are wonderful.

Come and see our bedroom. We did a fantastic thing up there.

Come on.

Commentary.

Constantly. I'd say three times a week. Like the other night, Alvy wanted sex.

Corned beef, please.

Could make me be blue

Damn it! I was so close!

Denial of Death. This is the first book I got you.

Didn't you take a shower at the club?

Dinner dates and flowers

Do I drive? No, I got a problem with driving.

Do you believe Tessie had the personality?

Do you love me?

Do you realize how immoral this all is?

Do you realize how paranoid you are?

Do you understand? A hot medium.

Do you want to get married?

Do you? That's funny, because I happen to have Mr. McLuhan right here.

Does this sound like a good course: "Modern American Poetry"?

Doing things we used

Don't ask me why.

Don't be ridiculous.

Don't do that.

Don't give me your life's story.

Don't let it be so long now.

Don't put it on me. I don't want to put a wad of white powder in my nose.

Don't squish it. After it's dead, flush it down the toilet, okay?

Don't tell me we're going to have to walk from the car to the house?

Don't worry.

Don't you have Raid in the house?

Don't. You're using sex to express hostility.

Especially when he sang, "She takes just like a woman...

Even as a kid, I went for the wrong women. I think that's my problem.

Even then I knew they were just jerks.

Even when you got famous, you still distrusted the world.

Even wrote a road map to get us to the bathroom.

Everybody in line has to know our rate of intercourse?

Everyone fell in love with Snow White, and I fell for the wicked queen.

Examining my life and trying to figure out where did the screwup come.

Excuse me. Hi, I'm Tony Lacey.

Excuse me. When do I go on?

For cheating on my metaphysics final.

For me it's been terrific. You know?

For your own experience. You want to write. Why not?

Full of loneliness, misery, suffering and unhappiness...

George was real sweet. He had that thing.

Getting his free turkey...

Give me a magazine, 'cause I'm a little tired.

Give me a medium chuckle here...

Give me a tremendous laugh here.

Go ahead.

God bless.

God, I did this really terrible thing to him...

God, it's a great day!

Good bye, Sally.

Good!

Good? Yes. No, that was the most fun I've had without laughing.

Good. Oh, thank you.

Grammy always does such a good job.

Granted La Strada was a great film.

Granted, it has bad plumbing and bugs. You say that like it's a negative.

Grass, right? The illusion that it makes a white woman more like Billie Holiday.

Great in its use of negative imagery more than anything else.

Great sauce.

Hang in there for a second. I got a little erotic artifact...

Happy birthday.

Hardly ever. Maybe three times a week.

Harvard makes mistakes, too. Kissinger taught there.

Having you to walk with

He can. Do you have to give it so loud?

He has a Chair in History at Princeton.

He kissed me!

He looked her, then they both looked at me...

He placed third.

He really is one of the most indulgent of filmmakers.

He said as he removed her brassier.

He says, "Oh, Marie, sometime you make me so mad!"

He's dead. Yeah.

He's God. I mean, this man is God.

He's got millions of followers, who would crawl across the world...

He's just come back from the gin rummy finals.

He's neat looking and he was emotional.

He's saying, "Yes, we have a sale this week on Wagner."

He's screaming his opinions in my ear.

He's spitting on my neck when he talks.

He's strangling me.

Hello.

Here with

Here you are. There's people out there.

Here, you want some?

Here's a real present.

Here's what I want to know. Am I your first, big romance?

Hey, put it in the pot.

Hi, Doug. Douglas Wyeth...

Hi, Duane. How's it going?

Holy cow!

How about a ginger ale?

How am I a paranoid? I pick up on those kind of things.

How can we afford it, on your pay? What if she steals more?

How can you possibly oversleep?

How do you account for it?

How do you like this couple? They look like they're from Masters and Johnson.

How do you plan to spend the holidays, Mrs. Singer?

How long do you know Janet? Where do you know her from?

How you ever got to teach a course in anything is totally amazing!

How?

I "loave" you. I "luff" you, with two "f"s.

I admire the technique, but it doesn't hit me on a gut level.

I adore Alvy, but our relationship doesn't seem to work anymore.

I always wanted to try, but Alvy's very down on it.

I ask a psychopath, I get that kind of answer. Jesus!

I called you. You want to help me or not?

I came to get some shock therapy, but there was an energy crisis.

I can anticipate the explosion.

I can go uptown, too. I live uptown.

I can't believe this family.

I can't enjoy anything unless everybody is.

I can't get it off my mind! It's obsessing me!

I can't get it out. This thing's heavy.

I can't get over that this is really Beverly Hills.

I can't get with any religion that advertises in Popular Mechanics. Look.

I can't go in, in the middle.

I can't say that that's true at this point in my life.

I can't! My head is throbbing.

I can't. I can't put a live thing in hot water.

I covered the Dylan concert, which gave me chills.

I did it. I killed them both. What's the matter?

I did.

I didn't have to lie on the couch. She had me sitting up.

I didn't start out spying. I thought I'd surprise you, pick you up after school.

I didn't tell you. We're going to California next week.

I didn't think it was that big, but it's a major spider.

I distinctly heard it. He muttered under his breath, "Jew."

I do! It's for my girlfriend.

I don't believe it. You guys have never snorted coke?

I don't care what you say about David. He's a fine teacher.

I don't do it very often. It just sort of relaxes me.

I don't get a period. I'm a cartoon character. Can't I be upset sometimes?

I don't know how much longer I can keep this smile frozen on my face.

I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me.

I don't know why you have to get high every time we make love.

I don't know.

I don't know. I mean, I guess you must be sort of late.

I don't know. I miss you.

I don't know. I think it may have been Leopold and Loeb.

I don't know. I thought it might be fun.

I don't know. It's like you're removed.

I don't know. Six months ago I would have done it just to please him.

I don't know. You seem sort of distant.

I don't like to get naked in front of another man.

I don't like to show my body to a man of my gender.

I don't think California is bad at all.

I don't think I could take a mellow evening. I don't respond well to mellow.

I don't think I mind analysis at all. The question is, will it change my wife?

I don't think many couples could handle this, break up and remain friends.

I don't think our relationship is working.

I don't think you like emotion too much.

I don't, but I know your work. I'm a big fan of yours.

I feel like there's a great weight off my back.

I feel so guilty, because Alvy is paying for it.

I feel that life is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.

I flew in to see you.

I found it incredibly indulgent.

I found you

I found you

I get too wonderful for words.

I got a license, but I have too much hostility.

I got this VW out there.

I got time. I got nothing until my analyst appointment.

I had a really good day. It was a fine way to spend my birthday.

I had some very good memories there.

I had the radio on. I'm sorry, it was the television.

I happen to teach a class at Columbia called "TV, Media and Culture."

I have a bad history with colleges. I went to New York University.

I have a hyperactive imagination. My mind tends to jump around a little.

I have a terrific problem with authority.

I have my license here. It's a rented car.

I have some trouble between fantasy and reality.

I have this impulse to turn the wheel quickly...

I have to face facts.

I have to go now, Duane, because I'm due back on the planet Earth.

I have to go out there. Say something encouraging, quickly.

I have to go to Burbank and give out an award on a TV show.

I heard Commentary and Dissent had merged and formed Dysentery.

I heard high pitched squealing.

I heard what you were saying.

I hope you don't mind that I took so long to finish.

I interestingly had dated a woman...

I just try to feel it, to get a sense of it and not think about it so much.

I keep sifting the pieces of the relationship through my mind...

I know what you're going to say. I'm not a great driver.

I know you've only known me a short while.

I know. A relationship is like a shark:

I know. Because of our sexual problem, right?

I know. I prefer not to. Look, they're laughing at him.

I know. Sometimes I ask myself how I'd stand up under torture.

I live over here. Oh, my God, look! There's a parking space.

I lost track of most of my old schoolmates, but I wound up a comedian.

I love you.

I may throw up.

I mean it. I'll never play the piano again.

I mean that as a compliment.

I mean, no. I think it's important for us to explore new relationships.

I meet a lot of jerks.

I meet people, go to parties and play tennis.

I miss Annie. I made a terrible mistake.

I must say, I always thought my schoolmates were idiots.

I need grass.

I need the large polo mallet.

I never had a latency period. I can't help it.

I never read that. That was Henry James' sequel to Turn of the Screw?

I never want to belong to any club that would have someone like me for a member.

I ran over. I couldn't get a taxi. You said it was an emergency.

I ran up the stairs.

I realize what a terrific person she was...

I really can't say that's true.

I remember the staff at our public school.

I run a profitable dress company.

I said you, I and that girl from acting class should sleep together.

I saw that lunatic we used to see with the pinwheel hat...

I see two headlights coming toward me, fast.

I see.

I sell talliths.

I stop, and then I open with some jokes. That's where I need you.

I tell you this, because, as an artist, I think you'll understand.

I think he has a thing for Annie.

I think I can get money to make it into a concept, then turn it into an idea.

I think I should get out of here, 'cause I think I'm imposing.

I think I'm going to get better as I get older.

I think if I could pry...

I think my insights into Mr. McLuhan have a great deal of validity.

I think of us that way sometimes, and I live here.

I think that's sort of... Yeah, yeah.

I think there's too much burden placed on the orgasm...

I think we should get married.

I think we're both much too mature for something like that.

I think, if you let me, I could help you have more fun.

I thought it was very musical. I liked it a lot.

I told her about the family and my feelings towards men...

I told you a thousand times to keep a lot of insect spray.

I told you if you stuck to it, you would be great and...

I took a meeting with Freddy. Freddy took a meeting with Charlie.

I took a puff about five years ago at a party...

I tried, but it's very depressing.

I used to get my aggression out through those cars.

I used to live there for years, but it's so dirty now.

I used to lose my glasses a lot.

I walk out. Place looks wonderful from here

I wandered around And finally found

I want you to see my house. I live next to Hugh Hefner.

I was a great beauty!

I was a reasonably happy kid.

I was all schoolyard.

I was always the sister with good common sense...

I was at the Stones' concert when they killed that guy. Remember?

I was awful! I'm so ashamed! I can't sing.

I was brought up in Brooklyn during World War II.

I was depressed at that time. I was in analysis.

I was having lunch with guys from NBC, so I said, "Did you eat yet?"

I was more attractive when the evening began.

I was playing Richard II. Two guys with leather jackets stole my leotard.

I was quite a lively dancer.

I was suicidal, as a matter of fact, and would have killed myself...

I whine. I sit and I whine.

I work... I'm kind of classy. Know what I mean?

I'd like to come.

I'd like to get torn apart by wild animals.

I'd like to talk to you about that sometime if you get a chance.

I'll drive in. I rented a car.

I'll give you a shot of Sodium Pentothal. You can sleep through it.

I'll have the usual trouble with Annie in bed tonight.

I'll never know when to make the right move.

I'll say, "I just got back from Canada. They speak a lot of French.

I'll take a meeting with you if you'll take a meeting with Freddy.

I'll tell you this. He was not marksman enough...

I'm able to enjoy people more.

I'm at the Los Angeles airport. I flew in.

I'm auditioning at this club. It's my first time.

I'm comparatively normal for a guy raised in Brooklyn.

I'm driving.

I'm getting tired of it. I need your attention.

I'm going to buy you these books...

I'm going to get my camera.

I'm going to give him one more year, and then I'm going to Lourdes.

I'm going to have the alfalfa sprouts...

I'm going to take another in a series of cold showers.

I'm going uptown.

I'm having pastrami on white bread...

I'm in the wrong business. I know it.

I'm into leather.

I'm like a comedian, so if I get a laugh from a person who's high...

I'm looking forward to tomorrow. It'll be nice. You'll meet Mother and Father.

I'm meeting her in front of the Beekman. I have a few minutes left, right?

I'm moving in with you, that's why.

I'm not discussing politics or economics. This is foreskin.

I'm not getting my period! Jesus!

I'm not in the mood to see a four hour documentary on Nazis.

I'm not worried about aging. I'm not one of those characters.

I'm obsessed with death, I think.

I'm one of the few males who suffers from that. Go on.

I'm president of the Pinkus Plumbing Company.

I'm so tired of spending evenings...

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I can't go through with this.

I'm sorry. My sexual problem. Okay? My sexual problem!

I'm starting to get some feeling back in my jaw now.

I'm sure it's fun, 'cause the Incas did it. They were a million laughs.

I'm thinking about getting some cats.

I'm too tense. I need a Valium.

I'm very shallow and empty, and I have no ideas...

I've always felt he was essentially a technical filmmaker.

I've been going for 15 years. I don't have nothing like that.

I've been killing spiders since I was 30. Okay?

I've got a hit series.

I've got an idea. Call the guy who took you to the rock concert...

I've got to sing tomorrow night, so I have to rest my voice.

I've had four lessons.

I've never been so relaxed as I have been since I moved out here.

I've never been to Brooklyn.

If anyone ever told me that I'd be taking out a girl...

If I get too mellow, I ripen and rot.

If I have grass or alcohol, I get unbearably wonderful.

If I miss my therapy you can only think of it in terms of how it affects you!

If life were only like this.

If one guy is starving someplace, it puts a crimp in my evening.

If only I didn't feel guilty asking Annie to move out.

If only I had the nerve to break up, but it would really hurt him.

If only I had the nerve to do my own jokes.

If she is, then the hell with her. If she likes that lifestyle, let her stay.

If you could get me something to get me through the next two hours.

If you have a car...

If you must know, it's a hectic time for Tony.

If you want to see a movie, you have to stand on line.

If you'd like to come, we'd love to have you.

Imagine my surprise when I got your call.

In 1942 I had already discovered women.

In about six weeks we could cut the whole album.

In the Coney Island section of Brooklyn.

In the Eisenhower administration, briefly.

In the event of war, I'm a hostage.

In the middle? We've only missed the titles. They're in Swedish.

Interestingly, however, I did run into Annie again.

Is he kidding with that crap?

Is it the old Groucho Marx joke...

Is one usually attributed to Groucho Marx...

Is that a reason to steal from your partner?

Is that Paul Goodman? No.

Is there booing on that?

Is this an interview? We're supposed to be making love.

It could be freezing or raining. And here...

It doesn't count, 'cause they're always laughing.

It goes like this, I'm paraphrasing:

It had to be you

It had to be you

It has to constantly move forward or it dies.

It is. It's dynamite ham.

It lacks a cohesive structure.

It makes it easy for me, because I can be...

It must be a tremendous hem.

It relaxes me.

It ruins it for me if you have grass.

It was a wonderful set. I really enjoyed it.

It was ironic to me...

It was just great!

It was on the Upper West Side of Manhattan.

It was really weird, but she's a very nice woman.

It was snowing and really gray in New York.

It was yours, actually.

It was, I don't know. You really thought it was good?

It won't be expanding for billions of years!

It would be nice to meet some new people.

It'd probably wreck her, but I should be honest.

It'll be great, because all those Ph.Ds. are in there discussing...

It'll pass. I'm going through a phase, that's all.

It'll turn up in our bed at night. Get out of here with that thing!

It's 3:00 in the morning. You got me out of bed.

It's a Biblical name, right? Does he call you Bathsheba?

It's a big subject with me. I have a pessimistic view of life.

It's a drag coming home.

It's a dying city. You read Death in Venice.

It's a great story, though. It really made my day.

It's a new art form. A set of aesthetic criteria have not emerged yet.

It's a nice ham this year, Mom.

It's a very big spider. A lot of trouble. There's two of 'em.

It's a wonderful thing. You meet wonderful, interesting professors.

It's always some kind of an excuse. You used to think I was very sexy.

It's been a long time!

It's Easter. We'll sit down and eat. I think they'll really like you.

It's funny.

It's got bad plumbing and bugs. Jesus.

It's great stuff, Alvy. A friend just brought it in from California.

It's just, I mean...

It's like a visual poem.

It's like Samuel Beckett.

It's like when I think of dying. You know how I'd like to die?

It's me. Open up. Are you okay?

It's never something you do. That's how people are. Love fades.

It's not natural. We're sleeping in a bed together.

It's not your fault. Don't take it personal.

It's really a thrill, as you know.

It's so clean out here.

It's so phony. We have to leave New York during Christmas. It kills me.

It's the influence of television.

It's there. We don't have to go to it, deal with it...

It's unbelievably transplendent!

It's very hard to believe.

It's wonderful. They eat and watch movies all day.

Jesus, what did you do? Come by way of the Panama Canal?

Jesus, you don't want it to be like we're married, do you?

Jesus! Now I don't get to do the TV show?

Jesus! Really?

Jesus.

Jesus.

Joey Nichols. See? Nickels.

June 14, 1940. The German army occupies Paris.

Just don't get angry.

Just don't take any course where they make you read Beowulf.

Just forget it. Let's just forget the conversation.

Just let me... Come over here. Tell him.

Just pick up the license.

Just put on the watch and that thing. It'll be perfect.

Just relax, be very mellow.

Just stay there. I'll come right over.

Just to be sad

Just to have my arms

Just to have my arms

Just to touch the hem of his garment.

Keeps out the alpha rays. You don't get old.

Key word here is "indulgent."

Kind of a French number. Can you do it?

La de dah.

Last night it was a guy honking his car horn.

Lately the strangest things have been going through my mind...

Leo, I married a fool!

Let me explain how I work. You can tell off the bat...

Let me explain. I'll open with an opening song.

Let's just do it, all right?

Let's never break up again. I don't want to be apart.

Like a kind of liberating consciousness.

Like the tip of your nose, and if I stroke your teeth or your knee caps...

Like this house, Max?

Like we're left wing, communist, *******, homosexual pornographers.

Linen supply business or cement and contracting.

Listen, while you're in California, could you score some coke for me?

Listen. You want to come upstairs and have a glass of wine or something?

Living together hasn't been so bad, has it?

Local kid who'd meet you in front of the movie house on Saturday night?

Look at him mincing around. Boy, thinks he's real cute.

Look at that guy. There's Mr. Miami Beach in the pink.

Look at these guys. That's hilarious. They're back from Fire Island.

Look who's talking! You've been seeing a psychiatrist for 15 years.

Look! One crawled behind the refrigerator.

Look! That's my old house. That's where I used to live.

Look. All the books on death and dying are yours.

Look. That over there is Joey Nichols.

Love is too weak a word for what... I "lurve" you.

Lyndon Johnson?

Make it out to Ralph.

Makes me shout This must be the place

Making dreams come true

Making fake insights with people who work for Dysentery.

Marshall McLuhan deals with it in terms of it being a high intensity.

Max, forget about Annie. I know lots of women you can date.

Max, I've got a girl for you. You are going to love her.

Max, my serve is going to send you to the showers early.

Max, the city is terribly run.

Max, there's no crime, there's no mugging.

Maybe if I put a dish of butter sauce here, it'll run out the other side.

Maybe that accounts for my personality, which is a little nervous.

Maybe we should call the police. Dial 911. It's the lobster squad.

Me? No, not at all.

Me? No. Don't be silly.

Me? Oh, no.

Melvyn Greenglass and his fat little face.

Mo Moskowitz. He had a coronary.

Modes of alienation, and we'll be in here quietly humping.

My analyst says I exaggerate my childhood memories...

My analyst says I should live in the country and not in New York.

My analyst thinks this move is key for me.

My feet haven't touched pavement since I reached Los Angeles.

My God! What would they think?

My mother, an emotionally high strung woman, locked herself in the bathroom...

Neat? I hate to tell you this is 1975.

Neither do we.

Next he'll find you're keen and peachy. Then he'll have his hand on your ass.

Next to Tudor next to Japanese.

Nice car. You keep it nice.

Nice to have met you. Good night.

Nice. Santa Claus will have sun stroke.

No food. You know, to atone for our sins.

No jokes. These are friends. Okay?

No question. I think we're doing the mature thing.

No, don't be silly. What do we need other people for?

No, I can't eat this. I'm nauseous.

No, I couldn't make it. My raccoon had hepatitis.

No, I don't use any major hallucinogenics.

No, I don't. I was in a record store. Listen to this.

No, I just lost a little weight, that's all.

No, I mean you don't have to. You're probably late and everything.

No, I'm fine.

No, I'm sorry. I'm not going to go on after another comedian.

No, no. I never shower in a public place.

No, stay there. I'll come over right now.

No, that would be fine. I wouldn't mind. Sure.

No, they didn't. You have a wonderful voice.

No, what... Sure, I...

No. Look. I gotta go.

No. Maybe I'd better lie down.

No. My stomach felt queasy all morning.

No. We live together, we sleep together, we eat together.

No. We're friends.

No. What's the matter?

Not only is he a great agent, but he really gives good leading.

Not only that, you look thin and tired.

Nothing like my family. The two are like oil and water.

Nothing that a few mega vitamins couldn't cure.

Nothing. No, no.

Now we can go about our business...

Now we're getting to a subject you know something about.

Of course I do. Don't you think I do?

Oh, dear.

Oh, gee, mess up my moustache wax.

Oh, I'm sorry, I have something. What about Saturday night?

Oh, my God! She's right.

Oh, no. I have a car.

Oh, right!

Oh, the thing! Oh, the thing. Yeah.

Oh, why? You got a car?

Oh, yeah? Yeah?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, you're on next.

Okay, it's in. It's definitely in the pot.

Okay! My analyst just thinks I'm too tense! Where's the goddamn Valium?

Okay? Now we can digest our food.

Okay. If that's all that we've been through together means to you...

Old times

Old times

Old times

Old times

Old times

Old times

Old times

Once in a while.

One says, "The food at this place is really terrible."

Or don't you remember that day?

Or, let's see...

Paranoid? I'm looking at you, and you've got your arms around another guy.

Pass the brisket.

Perhaps it would be better if we took him to the hospital.

Please, I have a headache.

Political commitment in 20th century literature.

Portchnik.

Portchnik.

Pretty awful.

Really strike oriented...

Really?

Really? And what is the kick of it?

Really? How'd you like it?

Really? Maybe...

Remember that day?

Remember we discussed that thing?

Remember we had that thing?

Right now it's only a notion.

Right, Max. California, Max.

Right.

Right.

Right. I don't know. I mean, some of her poems seem neat.

Right. I think I know exactly what you mean when you say "religious."

Right. I'm a bigot, but for the left.

Right. To get back to what we were discussing.

Saturday night, I'm going to sing.

See? Nickels. You see? Nickels.

Seems like

Seems like

Seems like

Seems like

Seven and three is nine.

Sex with you is really a Kafkaesque experience.

She has a right to steal from us. Who can she steal from if not from us?

She hates ****. She thinks they just make money.

She said "wife". You heard that, because you were there. I'm not crazy.

She said I was guilty about my impulses towards marriage and children.

She said your name was Alvy Singer.

She was beautiful. She was willing. She was real intelligent.

She would not sleep with me the other night.

She's a colored woman from Harlem. She has no money.

She's a reporter for Rolling Stone.

She's a ten. That's great for you, 'cause you're used to two's, aren't you?

She's living in Los Angeles with Tony Lacey.

She's making progress, and I'm getting screwed.

Since our discussions here, I feel I have a right to my own feelings.

Since when do you read the National Review? What are you turning into?

Since you put it that way, it's hard for me to refuse.

Six year old boys don't have girls on their minds.

So anyway, George went to the union to get his free turkey...

So he's dead.

So how is it possible for Oswald to have fired from two angles at once?

So long, fellows. Keep in touch.

So what are you up to?

So when you go through life, be thankful that you're miserable.

So, did you do those photographs in there?

So, you work for Stevenson all the time?

So, your second wife left you.

Someday it will break apart, and that will be the end of everything.

Something he read, huh?

Sometimes I think I should live with a woman.

Sometimes I wonder where my classmates are today.

Sometimes when I'm driving...

Somewhere she cooled off to me. Is it something that I did?

Soon, when I lie down on his couch, I won't have to wear the lobster bib.

Staying up all hours

Still the thrill