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Look Who's Talking Too Look Who's Talking Too is a hilarious and heartwarming movie that will leave you laughing from start

Look Who's Talking Too

Look Who's Talking Too is a hilarious and heartwarming movie that will leave you laughing from start to finish. Directed by Amy Heckerling, this 1990 film is the sequel to the wildly popular Look Who's Talking.

The cast of Look Who's Talking Too features some familiar faces from the first film, including John Travolta as James Ubriacco and Kirstie Alley as his love interest, Mollie. However, what makes this film truly special is the introduction of two new characters: James and Mollie's adorable children, Mikey and his newborn sister, Julie.

What sets Look Who's Talking Too apart from the original film is the addition of the children's inner thoughts being voiced by none other than Bruce Willis as Mikey and Roseanne Barr as Julie. Their witty and often mischievous commentary provides a unique and hilarious perspective on the events happening around them.

In Look Who's Talking Too, James and Mollie are navigating the joys and challenges of parenthood with two young children. Mikey, now a toddler, is struggling with the changes in his life as he learns to share his parents' attention with his baby sister, Julie. Through Mikey's eyes, we witness his hilarious attempts to win back his parent's undivided attention and his growing bond with Julie.

The film takes a humorous approach to depicting the adventures and mishaps of raising young children. From potty training disasters to sibling rivalry, Look Who's Talking Too captures the chaotic and joyous moments that many parents can relate to. James and Mollie face various challenges as they balance work, parenting, and their own relationship, all while trying to provide the best life for their children.

The chemistry between the cast members is undeniable, with John Travolta and Kirstie Alley delivering heartfelt performances as parents doing their best. Bruce Willis and Roseanne Barr lend their distinctive voices to bring the children's inner monologues to life, adding an extra layer of comedy to the film.

If you're looking for a movie that will make you laugh out loud and tug at your heartstrings, then Look Who's Talking Too is a must-watch. Its relatable storyline combined with the hilarious inner thoughts of the children make for an entertaining and memorable viewing experience.

You can enjoy the sounds and music from Look Who's Talking Too by playing and downloading the official soundtrack. Immerse yourself in the whimsical and playful melodies that perfectly accompany the film's humorous moments and tender scenes.

Don't miss the opportunity to witness the adorable antics of Mikey and Julie and the humorous journey of their parents in Look Who's Talking Too. It's a film that will leave you wanting more, and luckily, you can revisit it any time by playing and downloading the sounds and music that made this movie so unforgettable.

A card's a card. Why do you have to name them all?
A little napalm ought to slow you down, colonel.
A lot of times people just drop dead here, and you say:
A penis.
Airborne Express terminal.
All right, baby, here we go. Gum this down. No, there's no salt on it.
All right, calm down. Just a minute.
All right, fine. Walk. That's...
All right, here goes nothing.
All right, here we are. Thank you.
All right, I think I'm gonna try it. Yeah, yeah, it's solid.
All right, let's discuss this $1200 loss.
All right, take Julie. Go see Daddy. Go see Daddy.
All right, we got Schwarzenegger, and we got Betty Boop.
All right! Lay one on me.
All right.
All right. Okay. All right. Come on. All right, all right!
All the yelling. Here's what I think of your little friend!
Almost there. Just a bit longer.
Always works.
Am I a waiter or a pilot?
Americans have turned themselves into fat assed lazy slobs...
And don't forget to breathe!
And don't take the subway. There's a lot of weirdos. Take a cab.
And I don't have to pee.
And I'm going, I'm going, I'm...
And let me tell you something else.
And let's see. What do we get? A jar.
And she'd say these cause emphysema. And this causes liver disease.
And that's employer provided work space.
And the pee pees listen to you?
And then I knew it was over.
And they check our tax return every year just to make me look stupid.
And they're both schmucks.
And you can potty too Yes, you
And you do this. You take it out, okay?
And you have Daddy to thank.
And you're sitting pretty with your bottled water.
Anything you need, ask.
Are you okay, sweetheart?
As God is my witness, I'm going to learn to walk...
At least with my job I can fly different types of aeroplanes.
At this rate there are a lot of things you won't be doing.
Basically, their Uncle Ernie...
Beautiful. I'm good at this. I ought to get a job here.
Because he doesn't have a job that he loves. Like we do.
Because it's dark doesn't mean monsters are coming out. These are my toys.
Because she's a baby I have to go to bed early.
Because we dearly love it.
Because you're gonna be Julie's big brother.
Better for you.
Big deal. I made a doodie.
Bombs away!
But eat your doo doo and your pee pee? The thought is too hideous!
But emotionally, I'll just look at the way he'll eat something disgusting.
But eventually you have a heart attack. Jump up and down like that.
But I do love you.
But I promised he could finish watching the video.
But I thought you hated me. You're always mean to me and stuff.
But I won't say anything if that's what you want.
But I wonder if I can make it all the way to the couch.
But it's pouring!
But no matter what he did, he'd get in trouble.
But she's got some set of balls.
But sometimes nothing has to come out.
But then, on the other hand, what if there is a Mr. Toilet Man?
But Travis Bickle moves in with a semiautomatic weapon and it's okay?
But what do you think'll happen when the shit hits the fan?
But you know what bothers me? What really ticks me off?
But you're not coming out till I say so!"
Bye bye, birdie! Think you're a bird?
Bye bye, honey. Bye bye.
Bye, honey. Bye, honey.
Calling out the heavy artillery, huh?
Can I help you?
Can't I see it for a little?
Charge! I got you!
Check out the blond on the monkey bars. You can see up her dress!
Clamp.
Come along and be my potty boy
Come along and be my potty boy
Come here, Elvis. I'm your kid, not them.
Come on, buddy, help me out.
Come on, follow me!
Come on, let's go. Keep going. Keep moving, guys. Please.
Come on, mama. Come on, hot mama.
Come on, Mike. Come on. Come on.
Come on, twist.
Come on! Dance! Dance! Come on, damn it, I'll slap you!
Come on. Let's go. Let's go.
Come on. You can stay in my room tonight.
Cowboys are real, but witches aren't real.
Cut me some slack here!
D and what comes up? Dog.
Dad, who's kidding who?
Daddy doesn't have a set like his.
Daddy was screaming.
Daddy.
Damn! All right, all right. What terminal is he in?
Decide, him or me.
Dickface.
Did he ask to talk to me at all?
Did Uncle Ernie have any experience in the restaurant business?
Did you push the button?
Didn't it feel great not worrying about driving the cab?
Didn't that make it worthwhile?
Dinosaurs aren't real, and monsters used to be real.
Do not give them any diet Coke like last time.
Do that step we do.
Do this, kids.
Do you believe what they're asking for teddy bears? It's a crime.
Do you have the books?
Do you have to be so graphic?
Do you mind? I got a date.
Do you read me, 47 Poppa?
Does that make you happy?
Don't be alarmed. Now, your baby is in distress.
Don't call him just because I'm bawling.
Don't come out.
Don't come out. I'm almost there.
Don't cry again.
Don't say piss.
Don't take your sister away. Mommy's heart jumped into her throat.
Don't tell me you're going along with this potty business.
Don't worry. He'll be all right as soon as he settles down.
Don't you even miss us?
Don't you hate it when your head is caught in your placenta?
Don't you think we should try and work out some of your problems?
Eat your doo doo and pee pee? Who said that?!
Eddie and his bonehead ideas.
Eddie gets all the girls.
Elvis is leaving the building!
Ernie was an idiot! It was a stupid idea and they lost their shirts!
Ernie was more of an idea man.
Every two weeks he calls Mollie for money.
Every year there's 200,000 fatalities related to the rain.
Everybody in the circle. Just get in the circle!
Everybody together. Who am I talking to here?
Everyone was always screaming at him.
Everything'll be all right.
Excuse me.
Eyes I understand.
Fine!
Fine. Don't have a cow.
Fine. I won't.
First a lousy birth and now this.
Follow him. Here, I'll give you a dollar.
Follow me. That's it.
For a non obsessive relationship, that's pretty good.
For your information, he works real hard.
Forecast calls for increased winds.
Forgetting one of her vitamins.
Freeze!
Freeze! Okay, put the bag down.
Get a load of this asshole here. He's a teacher.
Get away!
Get in a circle! Indians dance in a circle! Help me!
Give it to me or the next time you sit on me, I'll bite off your tushy!
Give it!
Good answer.
Good night.
Good! All right!
Got another house call.
Guys, I found a way through! Over here by the rim.
He can finish it tomorrow. He's tired.
He drinks everything but a drop, then puts it back.
He figures that his chair and his desk...
He has a classroom and a teacher's lounge.
He has a degree in accounting, which is like money in the bank. Unlike you.
He has the earning capacity of an illiterate immigrant.
He is amazing, isn't he? Stuart, let's get married!
He is not a schmendrick. He is a good father.
He just said it's not his main job. Cut him some slack.
He killed my friend.
He looks just like Leon!
He needs to go to bed.
He reads our magazines, hides them before we get to read them!
He takes bites of everything, then puts it back.
He tells me the salary, and I wanted to kick his ass.
He wants to know why Julie doesn't have a penis.
He won't go for it.
He would have a friend.
He'd say, " Do it. Why don't you do it? You are here. See my movie."
He'll be all right.
He's a slob, he's belligerent.
He's not wearing a diaper.
He's probably on his sister's couch, watching TV.
He's still family at your mother's.
Her husband's covered by a pension.
Here comes the new Cobra Hammerhead.
Here I go.
Here I go. Okay. Now's the time. I just...
Here she comes.
Here we go. In the...
Here we go. What's that?
Here you go, Ace. Keep the change.
Here you go, baby. Yeah, you can put it back in your mouth.
Here, here. Go ahead.
Here, let me give you a present. Here. What's this?
Here, let me open it. What?
Here, shoes, have a drink.
Here. And I want you to take this. This is mad money.
Here. Have a cow, honey.
Hey, buster, how'd you get in here? This is my womb.
Hey, I can be obnoxious too!
Hey, I don't want him to go.
Hey, I want a Cobra Camerahead.
Hey, Joey. Need some help?
Hey, look at this. Look what I'm doing.
Hey, Mikey. You're gonna be a big brother, doll!
Hey, Mollie. Do you want some chicken?
Hey, Mollie. See you later.
Hey, Pop!
Hey, punk! Get your own toy. All right, that's it.
Hey, Stuart? Nice jacket.
Hey, that's mine!
Hey, this is fun.
Hey, what's going on out there? Am I hearing things?
Hey, where's Mommy?
Hey, you look a lot better from the outside.
Hey, you! You little pisser! I'm talking to you!
Hey! My friend's back.
Hi, babe.
Hi, honey.
Hi, honey.
Hi, honey. How's your head?
Hi, Julie. Welcome to the outside. I'm your big brother, Mikey.
Hi.
Hi. What a surprise. Mollie never said she had a brother.
Him or you?
Holy cow!
Honey, everything's good.
Honey, look, I'll call Freddie tomorrow, okay?
Honey, you walked! You walked!
Hot mama!
How about a little squirt in the nostril?
How about him?
How do you do that?
How dull! You have to have some fun in life.
How you doing? You're back! This is my brother. This is James.
How'd it go?
I am going to baby gym. I don't see why you care anyway.
I am his mother.
I ate at a five star restaurant last week. And they gave me frozen sushi.
I can even put up with his Fascist views.
I can feel them in there, but maybe it's working.
I can see that! What is he doing here? This is not a nursery!
I can't believe this! What a big boy! Good boy.
I can't watch this part.
I carried the kid for nine months.
I chased him down here. We were going down some fire escape.
I chased him down. I jumped on the guy and I sucker punched him.
I did it!
I did! I said, "File a schedule C."
I do have to pee, and I better go somewhere.
I do. It deals with my favourite things, numbers and people.
I don't care anymore if I'm right or wrong.
I don't care. I ain't pooping in that thing. I got my standards.
I don't care. We should be out having fun.
I don't get it.
I don't get it. Am I losing it?
I don't get to make all the decisions because I'm the man!
I don't have to pee.
I don't know how you put up with her.
I don't know where Uncle Stuart is, but we gotta get out.
I don't know. The American Foundation of Crybabies or some shit.
I don't know. You'll find out.
I don't mind that every job interview he goes up on, he gets upset.
I don't remember it having batteries, but I'm sure that it's fine.
I don't want to go anyplace!
I get up for this job interview today. Everything's great.
I got a lot of work to do here. Let's see. I'll just try this one.
I got a spouse who wants to contribute into an IRA account.
I got clearance and I'm leaving, so go.
I got him to go to sleep. We never get to do it anymore. Please?
I got the time if you got the diapers.
I got upset. I didn't think you appreciated me getting that job.
I got you something for coming into the world.
I got you! Attack! It's coming through!
I got you! I got you!
I gotta be honest with myself here.
I gotta go.
I guess I'll learn some day.
I guess not.
I guess this is the end.
I guess you never messed with anybody's big brother before.
I guess you're my only friend, Herbie.
I guessed.
I had to pinch that one back.
I hate the way James is always telling me how to take care of Mikey.
I hate these Orientals! They're buying up this country. You know why?
I have always been really nice to your mother.
I have never, ever brought up money before!
I have to talk to Jimmy. This is crazy.
I haven't felt this good since he was born.
I heard life is short, but this is ridiculous.
I hope they don't stick me today.
I know it sounds disgusting, but you gotta trust me on this, okay?
I know that ice cream doesn't make up for me not being home.
I know what I'm doing. I should be lord and emperor of that child.
I know what's wrong.
I know you know I know.
I know. Let's play her a little song, Mom.
I love flying a Lear jet. It's just this beeper lifestyle.
I love you so much. I'll never let anybody hurt you.
I love you too.
I made it up.
I made it! I walked!
I may be big, but I am not stupid! So you just get out of here!
I mean, it's lonely in the front seat.
I mean...
I might make it if I could just get these doggone pants down.
I might make it. Don't come out.
I miss you kids so much.
I miss you so much.
I need a Cobra Hammerhead!
I need some cover.
I peeked in and the place was wrecked.
I said to this guy, "What are you, some kind of idiot?"
I see my tired baby sitting there, and I know he's got to get up early.
I shouldn't have said anything.
I think I'm gonna have a heart attack.
I think if he was in a loving environment, like my house...
I think maybe he just gets frustrated, you know?
I think my daddy likes these toys more than I do.
I think The Star.
I think they're a little young, don't you?
I think you are a big, stupid slob!
I think you're being lazy.
I think you're big and stupid!
I thought that if you did something you loved, you'd be happier.
I told him he could watch a video.
I told you not to read this. Now get up. Get up, honey.
I told you to take 48th. You should have taken 48th!
I try and teach her to crawl, she's bouncing like a spaniel.
I want a bowl of Kraft caramel pieces.
I was starting to think I could really love Brad.
I was taking her for a walk. I thought she'd have a good time.
I went through labour and the pain.
I went to put the key in the door and I saw it was a little open.
I wish James could get a job like that.
I won't kick him out. And I hate you for asking me to do this.
I wonder if he'll do the flying turd gag now.
I wonder if I'll have a set like his.
I'll be in charge of you for the next few years.
I'll find out what it's all about, and I won't promise you anything.
I'll get my troops together. We'll be back.
I'll have a talk with my pee pee.
I'll just push this. That doesn't work.
I'll make up the couch! Yes!
I'll rip your lungs out! Give it to me! What are you smiling at?
I'll take care of you. I don't know where that bonehead Uncle Stuart is.
I'll take her now.
I'll take that Gumby and I'll knock him from here to kingdom come.
I'll take the stairs.
I'm a failure as a big brother. Look at her.
I'm checking out the Faster Pussycats.
I'm fine. It's...
I'm getting ready to go to the potty, so don't come out.
I'm getting there. Yes!
I'm gonna be a big brother.
I'm gonna be a big brother.
I'm gonna take extra special care of you.
I'm just the right kid for the job.
I'm not done.
I'm not one of the kids. I can do things for myself.
I'm not taking him to the park anymore!
I'm only 1, and I know that's not funny.
I'm running pretty good now. I'm gonna jump.
I'm sorry, Julie.
I'm sorry.
I'm sure that there's a... Oh, oh.
I'm too scared to go to my apartment. I was robbed.
I'm walking.
I'm way ahead of you. We already asked.
I'm wearing the training pants, man.
I'm worried about you barbecuing all the time.
I've never had so much fun in my life!
I've told you, we fly around the weather.
Ick. Male bonding makes me sick.
If I drink out of a Styrofoam cup, you give me a two hour lecture.
If I said, "What do you want to do?", there'd be this face.
If I say Mikey can do something and you say he can't...
If you have a preference, act now. Those sex organs are forming soon.
If your mother doesn't stop bossing me around, I'll never be a good dad.
Imagine using your hand and turning it into a duck.
In observation.
In the same token, when you take a dump...
Intellectually it takes at least three dates to know somebody.
Is it in the tub, maybe? Did she break it off?
Is it me or is this guy weird?
Is she really okay?
Is somebody there?
Is this an appropriate subject for a musical?
Is this and this!
Is your diaphragm in?
Isn't it great, sweetie? Your brother went pee pee.
It depends on how it turns out.
It doesn't really bother me that he takes my clothes.
It doesn't!
It had a quixotic quality.
It looks like I got my work cut out for me.
It means that it's your money so I'm not supposed to care.
It was a great idea. It was gonna have sushi, steak tartar...
It was an emergency. I see what you're up to.
It was Popeye. Yeah, he was the one.
It was scary.
It won't be because you're crying.
It's a Lear 24, just like your dad flies.
It's better than money. It's better than aeroplanes.
It's better than sex!
It's better to be up in the air pouring...
It's especially not good for kids.
It's for boys. Jeez.
It's for this liberal organization.
It's getting a little tougher now.
It's like Mommy. Mommy is a girl, so I don't have a penis.
It's my job to love you. We gotta stick together.
It's nice meeting you.
It's not loaded.
It's not loaded.
It's not your fault, and it's not your fault.
It's okay, honey. Mommy's here.
It's okay.
It's only been a couple days.
It's sacrifice. If you wanted something easy...
It's Saturday at 10:00, and we're here with our 10 40s.
It's tax season!
It's wall to wall storms. Didn't you listen to the news?
James has to call Freddie. Tell him how many hours, what planes.
James! Julie...
Jeez, I'm all cramped. And this thing!
Jeez, life sucks!
Jeez! For crying out loud!
Jeez.
Jeez.
**** and Italians dance in circles.
Jimmy called. He'll pick up the kids.
Jimmy, have you given any more thought to what we talked about?
Jimmy, I love you.
Jimmy, if a little unloaded gun makes him feel better...
Jimmy, what does it matter? A jet's a jet.
Julie, don't worry. I'll take care of you.
Just a regular old toilet, huh?
Just as I thought.
Just go.
Just jump. Jump up and down.
Just rip my whole face off.
Let go! Just, just... Hey! Everybody in the circle.
Let me get the chicken. This ain't over. This ain't over.
Let me in, baby. Let me in.
Let me show you something.
Let me tell you something. Accountancy is filled with hardship.
Let's get this bladder.
Let's see if you can fly now.
Let's see, two arms, two legs and two mouths?
Let's take her to the zoo and leave her there.
Let's take my sister for a walk.
Let's take stock here.
Let's take the Play Doh.
Like becoming a pilot when you fly two hours a week?
Like chili dogs.
Like earthquakes or flash floods or mud slides.
Listen, I've had it with you! You'd better give me that pee pee.
Listen. You know, hot stuff can be very bad for you.
Little boys have penises, but girls don't because they don't need them.
Look at that. Interesting.
Look out! Missed him.
Look, don't take the job. I don't care.
Look, if I promise him something, don't make me look like an asshole.
Ma, you are forever on his case.
Makes him feel better?
Man, I have never been more insulted.
Maybe climbing a tower and shooting students would make him feel better.
Maybe Eddie was right.
Maybe I better show her about toys right away...
Maybe I ought to try this potty thing.
Maybe I should get under the covers now.
Maybe I should try what Eddie said.
Maybe it will. Maybe it won't.
Maybe it's not.
Me? You're the bad one.
Mike, here. Remember your obnoxious routine, okay?
Mike, this is a potty, okay? When you want to take a piss you do it...
Mike, what do you say we see a movie?
Mikey, okay. You got me out of the hot stuff.
Mikey, this is your sister, Julie.
Mikey, this stuff is scary!
Mikey, time to go to bed.
Mikey, watch Julie, okay?
Mikey...
Mollie said some wonderful things about you.
Mollie, come on.
Mollie, I don't want that maniac around the kids.
Mom tells them to be good, they poke you in the eye.
Mom?
Mommy is so funny. She's always doing something so inventive.
Mommy! Daddy!
Mommy! Daddy!
Mommy! Daddy!
Monsters!
Monsters! Monsters!
Most people have them in their nightstands.
Mouths I understand. But eyebrows?
Mr. Toilet Man eating your pee pee?
Mr. Toilet Man eats your doo doo and your pee pee.
Mr. Wonderful, my brother.
My brother is 27 pounds of stupid.
My girl likes to potty all the time
My mom and dad were trying to help so they talked to their friends.
My parents are okay separately but as a couple, they stink.
My wife would never let me drive with the top down.
Night, baby.
No, don't read your accounting magazines.
No, dude. Don't say that.
No, he's probably getting laid.
No, I would never ask for special consideration.
No, no. Don't go.
No, please. They're okay. They're clean.
No, you shouldn't be here. It's too dangerous.
No! My neck! My neck! Hey, you with the scissors!
No.
No. Ma, you know, if James had a job that he really loved...
No. The first thing I said was:
No. When we have a girl, I will explain it to her.
Not in the nose! Okay, bottoms up.
Now Daddy has an account with Corporate Pilots.
Now I remember.
Now keep your hands in, Julie. Don't touch anything.
Now look, you guys, you know I'll be home soon.
Now the guy next door, he's got one of these.
Now, as a flight instructor you earned...
Now, Eddie, run this potty thing by me once more.
Now, let's discuss this bad business loan.
Now, wait a minute. My little sister is in my juice cup?
Of course you can. What happened?
Of course you do. It's a big boy toy.
Oh, boy, was that stupid or what? It was very stupid.
Oh, brother! All right. Here goes.
Oh, come on, Mollie!
Oh, come on!
Oh, great!
Oh, hi.
Oh, honey. I'm sorry.
Oh, I got wings and I'm flying!
Oh, I'm having a stroke! Oh, boy!
Oh, man, Julie, if we're gonna get your daddy back...
Oh, man!
Oh, man!
Oh, my friend!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my poor, sweet baby.
Oh, my tush hurts.
Oh, my tush hurts.
Oh, no, really? You're great. Thanks.
Oh, no!
Oh, no! It's the tadpole squad.
Oh, no. Not baby gym.
Oh, now I'll never get that tune out of my head.
Oh, sweetheart.
Oh, well, I guess I really don't believe that.
Oh, what a dilemma. Do I stay or do I pee?
Oh, yeah? Chase my daddy away, I'll show you.
Okay now, this might sound like a stupid question...
Okay, don't come out. Don't come out.
Okay, fine, fine. Let's work.
Okay, here we are.
Okay, here we go. I think we're safe.
Okay, I can do it holding on.
Okay, I give up. I surrender. I surrender.
Okay, let's see if I can make it.
Okay, Mike, I'm coming.
Okay, now let me see if I got this straight.
Okay, so what do you need? Paprika, vegetables?
Okay, stay calm. Just get Uncle Stuart.
Okay, thank you very much.
Okay, that feels pretty good.
Okay, that's 47 Poppa. You can cancel our flight plan.
Okay, you little brat, let go of her head.
Okay. All right, give me a kiss.
One day I'll take you to the airport. You can sit with me.
One minute.
Or just chaos and horror, people dying in the streets.
Or my being selfish and you wanting me out?
Or was it the other way around? I gotta listen more.
Or, "How'd you like that movie?" It's just this face that says:
Other than that, how did you like it?
Over there, behind that bean bag thing.
Papers with numbers on them! Debits and credits!
Pee pee in the potty
Pee pee in the potty Pee pee in the potty
Pee pee.
People say that when they accidentally kill someone.
People thought it was an X rated movie house.
Played... Where?
Please don't be mad at me whatever she says, okay?
Please get up, honey.
Poo poo.
Poor Daddy, hanging out with buttholes all day long.
Pop.
Popcorn, popcorn!
Popcorn! Popcorn!
Potty all the time
Pull over. I can walk faster than this.
Put the bag down.
Quick, while the moms aren't looking.
Really? Hey, that's pretty good.
Remember, this has nothing to do with you guys, all right?
Remember, you're gonna be her big brother.
Roger, 47 Poppa.
Rona, how do you like living with Stuart?
Rona, this is my brother, Stuart.
Rona! Stuart! Mikey went pee pee in the potty!
Rona! You want some chicken?
Santa Claus is real, but ghosts aren't real.
Say no more. You're tired after all that travelling.
Scissors.
See a man about a horse? Drain the snake? What do I say?
She needs to be changed.
She rips my face off and you punch me.
She told me that diapers are for babies.
She won't like the lions.
She'd say it causes skin cancer.
She'll be knocked out from the shot...
She's fine.
She's heading right for my toys.
She's mobile. She's moving.
She's okay. She's coming right out.
She's the greatest. She's so clever.
Shit.
Since I married, I haven't flown. I'll never work for an airline.
Sir, my kid left her shoe inside. Can we get it?
Six dollar. Yeah. Seven?
Slow. Nobody's gonna get hurt. Come on.
Smacking you around, getting you in shape, teaching you things.
Smarts, does it? Hurts just a little?
So he deducts 1/24 of his residence as work space.
So how did you arrive at this figure for your tips?
So I guess this time your feeling was right, huh?
So I say, give it to him.
So just allow the fucking deduction!
So you try to jump up and down a little more.
Somebody's loud and opinionated. Boy!
Sometimes they do, sometimes they don't.
Sorry for aiming this at you.
Sorry. She didn't mean to throw that on you.
Sponge. Get that.
Stewball?
Still feel them. Maybe they're listening to me.
Stop that guy!
Stop!
Stop. You're killing me.
Stuart, I've gotta go get James.
Stuart, put the gun down.
Stuart! Oh, no. What are you, nuts?
Stuart! You walked!
Sure, sure, laugh now.
Tail, don't fail me now.
Take a quick left. We'll shoot over to 46th.
Teddy bear, teething rings, P.J. Sparkles.
Thank God they left me with a responsible adult.
Thank you very much, Stuart!
Thanks, Bill.
That is it. I have had it with this park!
That isn't true! You said it was okay.
That long trip down the birth canal.
That means we can't plan vacations. What about the kids?
That stuff really sneaks up on you.
That'll be fun for you.
That's for sure. That's why we have to stick together.
That's giving him a lot of credit.
That's good! He understands. What's this?
That's it.
That's it. It's time to blow this pop stand.
That's okay. No one was killed.
That's right!
That's right.
That's right. You and me. We're the kids!
That's Sheila. We played doctor.
That's the trouble. He works his ass off for nothing.
That's what grownups are for.
That's what I want.
That's your baby sister, Julie, in there. She's kicking.
The biggest problem I got is squinting my eyes all day.
The Cobra Hammerhead'll sink those Joes!
The kids are gonna be so excited.
The Margolis account, huh?
The same toys that...
The way I see it, there's us and there's them.
The whole idea of sushi is that it's fresh.
The worst thing's the mess! Everything was thrown around.
Then I had this flash of having kids and the kids making that face.
Then I noticed this face he made. Kind of like...
There it goes, right back on. He didn't even see me.
There we go. There's something. I think I broke it.
There you go, Mike.
There you go.
There you go.
There you go. Take that.
There's monsters in my room!
There's no monsters. See? Do you see any monsters?
There's something I saw earlier that I'd like to build and if you...
These are all toys, right? Some are mine, some are yours.
They don't do anything bad. You're such a nudge.
They earn between 30 and 50,000 dollars a year.
They got all my costume jewellery. And some was really expensive.
They got my grandfather's gold watch, that pocket watch?
They got my telephone, my stereo, my camera.
They'd kill each other.
This is a joke, right?
This is for you. It is a...
This is Mollie Ubriacco. Can I speak to my husband?
This is New York. Women carry guns in their purses.
This is the first time I've done this. It was an emergency.
This is too much hot stuff.
This isn't about what aeroplanes they have to fly. What is it?
This voice inside me says you can't spend the next 60 years with him.
This was always good for me.
This'll teach me to accessorize.
To potty
To potty
Too bad. Don't bring him to work.
Tough call.
Tough call. They're both really built. They both talk funny.
TriStar Pictures, where anything can happen.
Tune her out. Tune her out.
Two dollars. Here you go.
Uncle Stuart! Uncle Stuart! Uncle Stuart!
Unlike your son, Stuart, who's got a plethora of opportunities.
Wait a minute, hold it.
Wait a minute!
Wait till I tell Eddie about this.
Wait! Hold it!
Wait. My kid must have pushed the button!
Wait'll they take that big sharp thing and stick you with it.
Want some cookie? It's a little moist but take a bite.
Want to think about getting toys in here?
Watch out, Mikey, it's a flying turd!
We got sophisticated instruments that tell me exactly where I can go.
We gotta boom a boom, a boom boom.
We have to, because the Toilet Man says so.
We just got one of these brand new outdoor electric stoves.
We were just finishing up the Margolis account here.
We're getting ready to go out! I'm so ex cited!
We're in. We're making it. We're doing it!
We're really lucky.
Well, at least I've achieved most of my goals.
Well, here I am. All conceived and nowhere to go.
Well, I don't know about that, but...
Well, I sort of like being right.
Well, I think I better just turn the light on just to make sure.
Well, I think we got everything.
Well, it's hospital garbage. They make crack pipes out of these.
Well, it's never stopped us before.
Well, look at us!
Well, the way it's going...
Well, yeah.
Well, you don't love flying, so it wouldn't matter to you.
What a rush! Oh, man! My wife would have hated that.
What a snail! Hey, let's go get some pork.
What about Stuart? It's about you, Mollie and your income tax.
What did I tell you? Look at this mess you got us into.
What did you do that for? I had him whipped.
What do you say we go out and get some Carvel?
What do you say you carry me around for once?
What happened to my quality time?
What happened?
What have I done to deserve this?
What I'm saying is your parents forget about you.
What if Eddie said was true?
What is wrong?
What kind of equipment do they fly?
What training thing?
What would Arnold say?
What? You mean my being a big stupid slob?
What're you doing here?
What're you looking at?
What's going on in here?
What's that?
What's that?
What's up, my man?
What's with him? He acts like I don't even exist.
When I had a bleeding ulcer and I came out of the anaesthetic...
When I have this new baby girl, I'm gonna need your help, okay?
When you have to pee, you jump up and down.
When you want to take a pee pee, you do it in here.
When you want to take a whiz, you do...
Where'd everybody go?
Where's Jimmy?
Where's that pee pee? We're talking about pee pee!
Which one?
Which part? Blaming me for turbulence spilling wine on them...
Who else? Pee wee? No.
Who is it? Damn it. It must be some kind of nut!
Who is it? Who is it? What do you want? Go away!
Who left the kids with Stuart? That was a pretty bonehead idea, huh?
Who said the highway was safe?
Who the hell is that?
Who?
Who's gonna go thirsty?
Who's this asshole?
Whoa, Wilbur! Here I go!
Why are you and your brother accountants?
Why do you have a gun in my house? There are kids here!
Why do you put him ahead of me?
Why does everything have to be your way?
Why don't you just put me in a fucking dress, okay?
Why? Is she gonna do something besides slobber?
Why'd they do that? He was just working his plate.
Will this pain ever go away?!
Worse... Try and stay with me when I'm talking to you.
Wrestling Buddies by Tonka? I want one of those!
WWF Wrestling Buddies, the rough and ready wrestlers from Tonka!
Yeah, "ball" being the operative word.
Yeah, a year and a half.
Yeah, big ones don't make any sense.
Yeah, bite my teething ring.
Yeah, he says we're too young.
Yeah, I would.
Yeah, I'm doing it. I'm doing it!
Yeah, I'm fine. I just wish James would get here, so I can go to work.
Yeah, right and shutting down.
Yeah, the kids knocked over the popcorn in the theatre.
Yeah, well, I do hate you a lot of the time.
Yeah, well, it's a good start.
Yeah, yeah. I know all about computers. Scoot over, girls.
Yeah!
Yeah.
Yeah. I think I did.
Yeah. It's all right.
Yes, but they still wanted to eat there.
Yes, I'll kiss you.
Yes, like that. Fine.
Yes, you are my prisoner!
Yes!
Yes! Yes!
Yes! Yes!
Yo, thanks, babe.
You afraid you'll get recognized?
You and James have been together forever.
You and me?
You and me.
You are deranged. You know that, don't you?
You behave.
You can do that. You just go up and down.
You can't ask me to choose between you and my family!
You can't bully me. You can't get through this diaphragm!
You can't fly around it.
You can't have it. You think you can jump into a toy like this?
You can't wait for this schmendrick to get his act together.
You creep!
You dearly love being accountants?
You didn't take the left!
You do it. I told him about the potty bit.
You do too, you liar.
You dog!
You drive me crazy, you bug me...
You earn more money so you can make the decisions...
You feed the kids their dinner.
You got a sister?
You got to fight for your right
You got to fight for your right
You gotta say, "Hey, yo, pee pee, I know you're in there.
You gotta take control of the situation.
You guys make me laugh. You're really funny.
You have a son and you're pregnant, so you get special consideration.
You hit me. You hit me.
You hungry?
You hurt my friend.
You just got a couple of creeps.
You kept track for a period of time and did a projected estimate.
You know what he did? He picked up a crack pipe.
You know what her idea of living dangerously is?
You know what I'm talking about.
You know what you have to do? You have to take control of the situation.
You know what, Rona?
You know what? If you want a boy, you eat more sodium rich food.
You know, these things take hours, believe me.
You like this house? It's a very good house.
You liked it! I knew you would.
You made it up?
You mess with my mother, you mess with me.
You missed. Go wide!
You need to do a separate and a joint return.
You never know what big ones are gonna do.
You okay?
You see, at this age people have the tendency to have a heart attack.
You seen my sunglasses?
You should have seen my brother as a kid. He was so cute and sweet!
You stock up your cabinets with bottled water and flashlights.
You want me to take a dump outside my diaper?
You want to be a criminal? Good.
You want to feel it? Here.
You want to know what it is? It's your mother, okay?
You would, huh?
You wouldn't have any fun doing it while I'm sleeping.
You'd lose a $2000 deduction.
You're a hot mama!
You're gonna send Margolis a spreadsheet with pictures?
You're lucky the fire didn't spread.
You're not gonna pull...
You're nuts.
You're on call anytime.
You're so naive when it comes to frozen sushi.
You're so scared! You're gonna bring him up to be a real crybaby.
You're supposed to give me pee pee!
You're the man so you make the decisions?
You're too little!
47 Poppa, due to adverse weather we're cancelling all flights.
48th is just as bad.
177 dollars a week.
An aeroplane! Oh, man.
And you know why? Tell me.
Are you okay? I think I'm just going into labour.
Are you with me, kid? Yeah, let's dress up for Daddy!
Bitchin' wheels. Ex cept I gotta ride beside her.
Bladder retractor. Educational.
But Daddy is a big? Penis.
But they still wanted to eat there. Everybody was offended.
Buzz off. Get your finger out of my eye.
Bye, doll. Bye, Daddy.
Call the fire department. Okay. Come on, baby.
Congratulations! Thanks.
Could I stay here for a while? As long as you want.
Could you reach him on his phone? No.
Crudities. Exactly. You know.
Daddy, don't take my nose! I got your nose.
Did my husband get here yet? We called him. He's coming.
Did you bring the shoebox? What shoebox?
Did you leave it on the plane? No.
Did you like it? Yeah.
Did you want me to let him kill you? What?!
Do you always have to be a putz? Oh, pipe down!
Do you believe? You were lucky with the keys.
Do you have a gun in there? It's not loaded.
Do you know who I hate? Stuart!
Do you want us to reschedule? No, no.
Don't undermine me. You don't undermine me!
Don't you think he's a little young? That hat's never gonna fit me.
Don't. Give Mommy your hands.
Eddie, let's get a apple juice. No, I'm into my training thing.
Elvis! Elvis! Elvis, my man!
Everybody looks like Leon. You think so?
Excuse me. Here we go. Where's the briefcase?
For what? Because I'm taking him to baby gym.
For what? Jimmy, talk to her. Be nice.
Get out of here! Here we go.
Give it up. Stop doing that!
Give me your hand. Oh, in there.
Go to bed. You're crazy.
Good luck with your job interview. It's confusing.
Good night, honey. Good night. I'll tuck myself in.
Goodbye, Mommy's honey bunny. Hi, Mommy.
Grow up, kid. Jeez, he's always so mean to me.
He does not. He tried to shoot me when I came in.
He doesn't have a place. Your mother's.
He doesn't like it. He does too.
He doesn't like it. He likes it.
He doesn't like it. We just have to make it fun for him.
He needs to socialize with kids. Go to the park.
He's on the field. He is? Has he taxied out yet?
He's the accountant for Mitsubishi. Not anymore.
He's their uncle. He sleeps with a gun.
Help! Monsters! I'll do it.
Here's a toy you can play with. I don't like balls!
Hey, buster, what are you doing? Nothing.
Hey, Priscilla. Hi, Elvis.
Hey, showoff. Get out of here. Hey, Mike.
Hey, twist. Twist! Turn, turn.
Hi, Elvis. Hey, Priscilla.
Hi, hon. You mind if I stay the night?
Hold this bladder, please. It's kind of...
Honey! What a good boy! Mike, you did it!
Honey? James, the baby's in trouble.
Hurricane Jonathan spreading damage. I don't eat meat.
I believe that was the salmon. Salmon?
I can't believe you did that. What did I say?
I could fix anything you want. I got a 9:00 flight.
I didn't say that. It's what you think.
I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say.
I don't think I can. As long as one of us do.
I don't think so. I believe so. Cold.
I don't. You do.
I got the fire exting... No, I bought it.
I gotta go. Mollie wants to talk.
I have a gut feeling you shouldn't fly! We don't need your gut feeling.
I have to get that. He'll stop.
I know what you're thinking. What?
I know where to go, stick with me. Yeah, bright idea. Now we're lost.
I know. I know you know.
I need that pee pee! Oh, no! Mr. Toilet Man!
I pay half the rent! I pay all the utilities!
I read it. In the The National Enquirer?
I think it is his fault. I think it's your fault.
I want him out of the house. We're going out!
I was just trying to help. I know you were helping me.
I'll have a talk with him. No, I want him out.
I'll lock up. You bet.
I'm getting a funny feeling. So this is how grownups get so tall.
I'm not gonna tell you again. Move.
I'm not leaving without you. Get out.
I'm not leaving. Get out!
I'm sleeping. I know.
I'm trying to educate you people! We're getting along fine.
If you want a girl, eat more dairy. Really? Who says?
Is that good? Why did I call you in here?
It looks like a kid. It looks like a kid.
It was an emergency. You shouldn't be here.
It'll take until you're 50. For your information, I got a job.
It's a country of showoffs. What's the deal with eyebrows?
It's an emergency. No.
It's just a dream. The Toilet Man.
It's just a physical thing. Just work.
It's not my main job. You spend most of your time doing it.
It's okay, Julie. I'm afraid.
Jimmy, hi. Hey, Rona. You look good.
Just when I was getting organized. Freeze!
Let me see your hands. My hands are okay, Ma.
Let's go where they're going. I been there.
Let's take it outside. Okay.
Mikey, guess what I got you? A Cobra Hammerhead?
Mikey, stop it! All right, I'll do it soft.
Mommy! Mommy! Wait, wait.
Mommy's here. Oh, sweetheart. Mommy. Daddy. Potty.
Monsters! Monsters?
My mother. You calling her a liar? No.
New York Centre, 135.9. 47, Poppa.
Night night, honey. Night night.
No penis. Oh, it's okay.
No, he won't stop. All right.
Not at this age, honey. Just tell him why we're different.
Not yet. Can somebody get him?
Now you hate them. I don't hate them.
Oh, come on. What?
Oh, honey, you okay? Yeah, she's fine.
Oh, I can't. Why?
Oh, my God. What is it?
Oh, yeah? Tell you what.
Pee pee's a wimp word. No, pee pee is easy for him to say.
Remember it? I live for it. Say popcorn.
Rona, let's go get something to eat. Okay, let's go.
Rona! Where is she? She's right through there.
See you later. I gotta bail, dude.
Shut up! Shut up, you!
Six. Six. A dollar.
Stop fighting. Did you look in the closet?
Stuart, you can't do that. It's only 1/24. Who will care?
Thank God I got that extinguisher. I got the fire extinguisher.
Thanks, doll. All right, big boy. I'll see you.
Thanks. Okay, I guess he went for it.
That was close. How did you get down here?
The books. Yeah, books. What do you mean?
The difference is I have great toys. Let me see.
The news always upsets you. Forget the news.
There's a lot of weirdos there? Yeah. You take a cab. Bye.
They like it. Let's help Joey out.
They're controlling your life. They do not control my life.
This one? No penis.
Throw it out. He could get diseases from that!
Want to do that? No.
We don't have any of that! Do not yell at him!
We got a boom, baby, boom... Knock it off!
We just walked. Technically, I was pushed.
We're the guys. We're the winners. I think I can.
What are you doing? I'm sorry.
What are you girls up to? Nothing!
What ramp? You'll have to come in and ask.
What? Tell him about boys and girls.
What?! What's wrong? We're going to do a cesarean.
What'd they get? Everything.
What'd you get for me? This isn't for you.
What's that mean? What do you mean, what's it mean?
What's wrong with him? What? What?
Where am I going? Where're they taking her?
Where are the kids? They're upstairs.
Where's he going? Reno or something like that.
Who does he think he's talking to? Are you hungry?
Who is it? It's me, Rona.
Who's watching them? Stuart.
Why not? It gets you out of the mood.
Will you relax? It's not good for the environment.
Would what? File a schedule C?
Yeah, I'm going. Wait a minute. She's up.
You hate me? You're being mean and selfish.
You have all these stupid, baby toys. Can I see that? I like it.
You know what I hate? What?
You know what it is? Get a load of those eyebrows.
You know why I'm here. Stop that!
You miss me? Yeah.
You realize that that's only... 177.
You shove over. This is my side. Get your arm away.
You tell him. I'm not telling him about it.
You think I could borrow $20? Sure.
You're doing a good job yourself! Keep it down out there, please?
You're inconsiderate and stubborn. Oh, yeah?
You're next. Oh, I hope so.
You're planning on living a long time. You know what I mean.
You're strict. You could get away with it.
You're the guy. Forget it.
Your keys! Toss them.
... and get the hell out of here!
... before she does something drastic to one of my toys.
... but where is Julie's penis?
... kidding myself.
... that he would really straighten out.
... the "Sir, my kid left her shoe inside. Can I go get it?" gag?
... you poke me in the eye, but you're my sister.
...$9212?
...and he could make money, that would be great for us.
...and I'm out of here. I do not!
...and raw vegetables.
...are 1/4 of his six room apartment.
...convinced them that it'd be a great idea to call their restaurant...
...Eat Me Raw.
...Julie is a girl and you are a boy, okay?
...or bawling me out for weak coffee?
...so no operating heavy machinery.
...than it is on a highway in cars.
...then you cut my nuts off. How can I be a good dad?
...think about it.
...we're gonna have to do some serious packaging.
...who'd rather sell their toes than get up and walk a block.
...why didn't you become a dental hygienist or a car rental person?
"Ed, what happened?" "I forgot to breathe."
"I didn't think it was loaded."
"I don't know. What do you want?"
"Turn, open and press."
"What's Jimmy doing? He's out having a ball."
"Where's my adding machine? Where's my calculator?" That's what I said!