Celebrity Jeopardy: Stewart, Reynolds and Connery | Saturday Night Live Edit

A combination of three and five.

A letter V.

A one, or a two...or a three. Or how 'bout a four?

And finally, back again, Burt Reynolds in a commanding lead with $14.

And finally, Mr. Connery, the category was Numbers, and you wrote...

And the category is you know what?

And you wagered... Texas with a dollar sign in front of it.

Any number. Any number, and you win.

Changed his name to Turd Ferguson.

For $400.

French Stewart in 2nd place, with negative $17,000.

From 3rd Rock From the Sun,

Good night, my would you get that off me!?!?

I remember, he had a pal, Scrappy Doo.

I'm speechless.

It's not funny.

It's that simple. I know you can do this.

Jeopardy round, I'd like to ask our contestants once again,

Let's just go to "Animal Sounds" for $600.

Let's see what you wagered.

Mr. Renyolds, unfortunately, you're in the lead, so we'll start with you.

Mr. Reynolds, it's still your board.

Mr. Reynolds, what are you doing?

Mustard is made from mustard seeds.

Okay, let's just move on to Final Jeopardy.

Please refrain from using ethnic slurs.

Sean Connery has set a new Jeopardy record with negative $230,000.

Simply stunning.

So despite your best efforts, you answered correctly.

Solved mysteries.

Thank you very much. I'll take Animal Sounds for $800.

That said, let's take a look at the scores.

The answer was mustard.

Think you've got the right answer?

This condiment is made from mustard seeds.

Turd Ferguson. It's a funny name.

Well, I tell you what, my friend, V is a Roman numeral,

What with your Diego mustache, and your greasy hair.

Yeah well, why don't you give me, uh, why don't you give me Ape Tit for $200.

Yeah, I found this backstage, an over sized hat. It's funny.

You know, a normal hat.

You look pretty sure of yourself.

[Alex] Burt Reynolds.

[Alex] French Stewart, the sound a dog makes.

[Alex] Look, what did I just say about ethnic slurs?

[Alex] No.

[Alex] We'll accept any number. Any number at all.

Come on, that's way out of line.

Good work, all right.

Great. Let's take a look at the final board.

Ha ha!

Ha ha!

Hey, uh, I speak a little French. You're an assbite, pardon my French.

I hate my job.

It's A Petit never mind.

Moo.

Mr. Reynolds has apparently

My name's French!

No I didn't.

No, I did not get the answer from anyone else,

No, it's not!

No! Good Lord! We would've accepted "bow wow", or "ruff"!

No.

No.

Oh, ruff. Just the way your mother likes it, Trebek!

Okay, that's not necessary.

Okay...Turd Ferguson.

Sure it is. It's funny. It's funny 'cause it's ah, bigger than, ah

Take a look at that!

That is incorrect.

That was a funny dog, Scooby Doo, He drove around in a van, and uh,

That's "Condiments".

That's all the time we have.

That's beautiful.

That's not my name.

That's not the right answer.

The answer, of course, is onions.

Um...who is John Caffney and the Beaver Brown Band,

Welcome back to "Celebrity Jeopardy". Before we begin the Double

Well, all you had to do was write down a number. And you wrote...

Well, that's the sound your mother made last night.

What's going on?

Who is, ah...Scooby Doo?

Yeah, don't bother, I didn't write anything.

Yeah, I see it. Go back to your podium.

Yeah, I'll take the condom thing for, uh, eight thousand.

Yeah, that's right.

Yeah, well, that's your opinion.

Yeah, what do ya want?

Yes, I'm pretty sure of it, Alex.

You buzzed in!

You think you're pretty smart, don't you, Trebek?

"A Petit Déjeuner"; that category is about French phrases,

"Animal Sounds"; "Condiments"; and finally,

"Sharp Things"; "Movies That Start with the Word Jaws";

"Suck it Trebek".

"Your Ass, Or a Hole In the Ground".

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[Sean laughing]

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♪ [band music] ♪

♪ [Final Jeopardy music] ♪

♪ [SNL theme music] ♪