Eight Crazy Nights (2002) Edit

A fuzzy screen was all that we could see

A little help, fellas?

A little help, please.

A technical foul

A technical foul

A technical foul

A technical foul

After all, Chanukkah is the festival of lights.

After all, it is the holidays.

Ain't a better time of year.

Alcohol in our house? This is never going to work.

All right, baby. But let's make this quick.

All right, brother. Let's go win this thing.

All right, davey!

All right, fuzzy wuzzy.

All right, i'm going to get going now.

All right, simmer down, whitey. Don't travel. Don't double dribble.

All that song was saying was the patch means the world to whitey.

All you people can bite my germfree booty!

And a happy first night of Chanukkah to you.

And ask about your mother's operation

And blowing a beef your way

And Chanukkah's eight nights too long

And don't forget the orange chicken at panda express.

And even though i don't recall scoring a point during my four seasons of play...

And get out of my car right now!

And his sister was freaky

And i am the real kristi yamaguchi.

And i guess i'll patch you later.

And i won't eat no potato latkes

And i'll charley horse your leg for laughs

And i'm guessing 99% of you have either laughed in whitey's face

And if i hear that you break one law...

And ignored the burning smell

And make sure every snowman dies

And my trailer's caught on fire

And on christmas eve and the last night of Chanukkah

And secondly, if you don't turn around...

And seeing other people enjoy the festivities...

And the 27th!

And the 33rd!

And the 34th!

And the woods we used to roam

And to me, the mall is the best place to do that.

And tonight, i got this.

And when the lightning struck him

And won't let down his guard

And you're bald!

Anything else i can do for you guys?

Anyways, the mayor seems to think there's a chance...

Appreciate it.

Are those tears in his eyes?

Are you finally dead, old man?

Are you ready to join me, big guy?

Are you the kid who stole my wig?

Aren't you a boy?

As a joke i told him to meet me at the prom

At least she was looking at me. That felt all right.

At least then they'd have a reason not to acknowledge me.

At least this one make me look pretty.

At one time, davey was a super student, super athlete...

At the annual all star banquet?

Attention all officers. Davey stone is on the loose.

Bam! Got a piece of my ass.

Be careful!

Because i'll do it all night long.

Because if a midget and a drunk can beat us, i'd eat my own jockstrap.

Before my warm heart turned to ice

Benjamin!

Benjamin.

Boo!

Boy

Breaking and entering.

Business or pleasure?

But he never quit on me

But i bet whitey wishes they showed up earlier...

But i guess my friend davey is. Why don't you tell him what else you got.

But i'd like to see it anyway

But i've been so busy at the hardware store this year...

But if you're short of cash like little old me...

But in order to do so, you're going to have to learn...

But it was only retainer

But it's closed.

But mr. Stone, what whitey says goes.

But next screwup, it's slammer time.

But please don't touch me with your alien hands

But possibly a homicide

But that patch thing ain't ever gonna happen for you...

But that shouldn't be too hard for him. Even loners need company sometimes.

But that was back when he was nice

But that was long ago

But that was long ago

But that was long ago

But the first time he really needed us

But the next time you'd see him, he'd go out of his way to smile and wave at you

But then i started drinking beer

But there is one thing he knows.

But there's some things you just aren't meant to get away from.

But this is tom's.

But we just turned up the volume

But you know what?

Can i sleep past 3?

Can i walk around with my morning erection?

Can we just go? I'm cold.

Can you blame him?

Can you imagine?

Can you take me home now?

Cheer up, eleanore. Let's just get ready for the banquet.

Christmas is right around the corner...

Come and help me clean the muffin trays.

Come back here, you jerk!

Come back here, you jerk!

Coming through!

Coming through.

Consider it done. Nice doing business with you.

Crunchy and delicious.

Cursing and acting like a jerk may be your idea of fun, but it won't be his.

Davey was wondering where his parents were.

Davey, i'm so sorry. I don't know what to say.

Did i just see two persian cats on your ass?

Did you prepare that or did you rhyme that many times in a row by accident?

Did you read about a deformed referee who spends 35 years...

Doesn't it make you feel good...

Don't be sad, mom. I can be your date.

Don't be scared.

Don't encourage him, benjamin. He's upset because he can't play no more.

Don't ever change

Don't let him push your buttons, whitey.

Don't tell me it's bavarian cream filled.

Don't think you can intimidate me just because of my size.

Don't worry, eleanore. I promise you'll have a good time.

Don't worry, folks. Whitey's okay.

Don't you wish i hadn't been so busy at the hardware store...

Down by the creek i would show

Easy, seizure boy!

Easy.

Eat that nut strap, bitch!

Eleanore duvall? Is that you?

Eleanore, could you just give me a second to say a few words in private?

Eleanore, that was 45 years ago.

Eleanore, that's davey stone, my new partner.

Eleanore's bra is a trainer

Ever wiped his ass with the wrong hand

Everyone in this room has been associated with whitey

Everyone in town will be looking their best

Excuse me! Can i just say something?

Fascinating.

Fatty's team loses because i want to see him cry again.

Finally.

Fine, i'll just ref in my socks.

Fire?!

Fireflies to that girl

First night, i got a basketball and some dreidels.

First position. Second position.

First to five wins. We're shirts.

For service to the league and this community, i proudly present to you...

For those of you celebrating christmas tomorrow, merry christmas.

For those of you celebrating the eighth night of Chanukkah...

Foul on this kid for eating everything in sight.

Four scorpion bowl in five minute? That's got to be a restaurant record.

Four. Five. Six.

Fourteen hours to be exact.

Fourteen.

Freedom.

Funny, i don't remember denise or janice ringing up a purchase for you.

Game on.

Getting himself arrested, mayor duhy. He broke into the mall.

Giving me those nasty eyes.

Glad we could work that out.

Go ahead and let it out and have yourself a cry

Go ahead, mr. Stone. Let's hear your parting words of wisdom.

Go ahead. I'll be on the first bus out. I ain't spending 10 years in prison.

Going to the big apple, son?

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I'm mayor stuey duhy.

Good evening, mayor stuey duhy. Out for some late night shopping?

Good job, fellas.

Good luck, chump.

Good luck, old man.

Good night, mayor! And the answer to your question is spencer's gifts.

Good to see you still got circus feet.

Good, your house sucks!

Got a piece!

Got any sand or rock salt in there?

Happy Chanukkah to our wonderful son

Happy Chanukkah, stone.

Happy Chanukkah.

Happy Chanukkah. Now, leave me alone.

Happy holidays, your excellence.

Happy holidays.

Has there been talk about who the lucky patch recipient may be this year or...?

Have a holly, jolly one, guys.

He could've at least given me a push or something.

He didn't know how to handle it.

He dine and dash me! He chew and screw me! He sip and skip me!

He just a no goodnik.

He let out a wicked loud yell

He may be big, but he's ugly, benny.

He should've gotten a big thank you

He thought he got some tongue

He walked right through that door and into foster home after foster home...

He was in a coma for three months.

He was just kidding, fellas. Whole lot of jibber jabber.

He'll be all right. How'd you get so good on the ice, anyways?

He's just having some fun.

He's right. Look for your opening and take it.

He's so behind the times, he thinks viagra's a big waterfall.

Hello, sharper lmage. Thanks for the combination pogo sticklclock radio.

Here with wigs mcgee and the furry elf

Here's to you guys for letting me crash over.

Hey, benny!

Hey, fellas.

Hey, jennifer, you still coming over to watch dukes of hazzard after the game?

Hey, look what i still got.

Hey, why are we stopped now? What are you doing? What's going on?

Hey, you two, just doing circles.

Hey!

Hey. What are you do...? No!

Hi, whitey. I got another Chanukkah present tonight.

His beautiful Chanukkah card

His home just went up in flames. So i invited him to stay with us for a while.

His mom had to do a double shift so i'm watching him till she can get here.

Hold it now. Hold it now.

Holy shit, did the mall just say something?

Hope you're not planning on driving tonight, stone.

Hopefully that young man's getting a weed whacker for christmas.

How could they let that guy work with kids?

How do you like your java?

How futuristic.

How'd he end up this way? Let's save that for later...

How's he doing that?

How's that peanut brittle?

How's that, fellas?!

Hubba bubba!

I ain't living with you buffoons.

I bet you wish you could take it back

I call that the top of the key eat the jockstrap shot.

I came to apologize, whitey.

I can handle myself, eleanore. Trust me.

I can whup any of those clowns out there even with you as my partner.

I can't believe i haven't killed myself

I carved our names upon that tree

I couldn't believe something that horrible...

I didn't do it for you. I did it for the ladies.

I didn't steal this. It's a card my parents gave me.

I don't know when you were goofier, then or now.

I don't know. Hopefully, out getting me an atari.

I don't see any skin, monkey man.

I don't think that's true. Do you, mr. Mayor?

I got no right to growl

I guess i'll have to deal with your demands

I guess that means i stole it.

I hate folks who think reindeer are cute

I hate love

I hate love

I hate love

I hate me

I hate me

I hate you

I haven't done that in a while.

I hope you all like your jockstraps extra sweaty.

I knew you'd screw up eventually, stone.

I know i am.

I know you hippies don't wear watches, but it should be fixed in 30 minutes.

I know you people don't like me or care about my opinion, but here goes.

I know. I was watching you.

I love it! Your ass busted!

I love you, car.

I loved him and he loved me

I may be dirty and smelly, but in the dark, i'm just smelly.

I mean, me too.

I mean, the body shop, the tie rack...

I need to get some traction.

I need to go apologize to someone before i leave.

I needed the rest anyway.

I remember the look in their eyes

I see. You're one of them hippie dippy fellas.

I should stick you on a twig and roast you.

I think i'm going to barf.

I think you all know which dream came true.

I thought you could use a refresher course on b ball rules and regulations.

I want a good, clean game and no back talk.

I want to hear what happens next. It's like a fairy tale.

I want to talk to you in my office.

I was being nice to her kid.

I was such a shithead

I went to high school with whitey

I wouldn't show that picture to anyone...

I'd hit a 3 pointer, but i'd have to drop my pants...

I'd like to see that right now.

I'd like to see that.

I'd like to welcome you to the 35th annual...

I'll be over to feed the cats in the morning...

I'll play. But if we win, you got to eat that guy's jockstrap.

I'll pour you down the sink

I'm acting like the town buffoon

I'm getting exhausted trying to cut around it.

I'm just here to say i'm sorry to the little guy. I swear.

I'm letting this one go, stone.

I'm not *******.

I'm not nervous. I'm excited.

I'm not very good.

I'm not. I'm running from two crybabies...

I'm out of here. I don't need this sympathy crap.

I'm scared.

I'm so sorry they hurt you, whitey.

I'm sorry.

I'm still shaking from it.

I'm surprised you have enough brain cells left to remember.

I'm the kind of guy who can't stand a holiday

I've been doing my part for 35 years.

I've been tossing and turning.

I've been waiting 35 years for this night.

I've been waiting to see your sister for many years.

I've seen some pretty rowdy kids turn into perfect gentlemen...

I've sent you to reform school, the drunk tank, the local psychiatric ward.

If i decide to wash my ass with your monogrammed towel?

If i don't spray lysol after moving a bowel?

If i give myself a wedgie will you believe me then?

If i make fun of your crazy feeties

If my parents fall asleep early, i'll show you my basement.

If that happened with stone, it would be a miracle.

If they have an award for the freakiest looking fraternal twins...

If you clean out the crappers, i'll give you a buck.

If you do, you'll get a t

If you don't shut the door

If you haven't heard by now...

If you switch the radio to some modern music show

If you touch the thermostat

If you want an automatic ejection

If you're coming from the street with dirty shoes on your feet

In fact, i've been kind of kidding myself...

In fact, the head honcho of holiday humbug...

In the '50s i reffed youth hockey for a couple of seasons.

In the '50s i reffed youth hockey for a couple of seasons.

In this house we say bullspit

Instead he got a port a potty ride

Is because i was the worst offender

Is he break dancing?

Is it just me, or did you notice when he said, it could be you...

It doesn't hurt to smell nice. Does it, fellas?

It is bavarian cream filled!

It was great patching with you.

It will. We just need to set some rules so davey knows how we do things here.

It'll be a nice snack for february.

It's a home invasion robbery!

It's about the kids and teaching them responsibility and teamwork.

It's about time you got here.

It's all good, whitey.

It's all you, buddy.

It's crooked, shorty. Move it to the right.

It's gonna be a good night. Let's get to it.

It's like a sanctuary.

It's okay, sweetheart. Talk to whitey.

It's only the most prestigious award given out at the all star banquet.

It's the holidays. Things like that have been known to happen this time of year.

It's the kind of a night when your feet match

It's your last year of reffing the youth league basketball.

It's your moment, whitey

It's your moment, whitey

It's your moment, whitey

Jennifer!

Joke's on you, tough guy. I can't read.

Just don't get your hopes up too high about the patch.

Just get back in my car. You'll stay with me and my sister for a while.

Just keep playing.

Just kidding.

Just let me put my teeth in.

Just makes you feel tingly all over.

Just pass me the ball.

Keep dreaming.

Knock, knock.

Last bus to new york city now boarding.

Last spring, her husband of 13 years ups and leaves her...

Learning to make a lay up with my left hand and becoming a multi billionaire.

Let it out, davey

Let me get this straight. You expect me to change my lifestyle in one night...

Let the guy talk!

Let's bring it home.

Let's go get some coffee.

Let's go, benjamin.

Let's just get off of this.

Let's just get some snacks and chat. Okay?

Let's try it black instead.

Let's try the red wig. And please, don't crap on my carpet.

Let's win!

Like the bavarian cream filled donut

Listen, sweetheart. I have to leave you here alone tonight...

Listen. We got rules in this house...

Look at davey, inches from a clean getaway.

Look who finally showed up. We've been waiting for you all night.

Look! He already stole something. He's hiding it in his jacket.

Look. You gotta understand it's just been me and eleanore for 67 years...

Looks like i better do a lot more than apologize. See you in 10 years, fellas.

Looks like you better start showing the spaz some respect.

Make some long distance calls?

Maybe i'll just take you in myself.

Maybe it's some kind of sign.

Maybe it's time you stop running from your emotions.

Maybe the night guard forgot to lock the door again.

Maybe you are a leprechaun.

Men's 11 right foot, children's 9 left foot...

Merry christmas, whitey.

Mom, i didn't get that one.

Mr. And mrs. Stone tragically couldn't get out of the way in time.

Mr. Duvall, the 35th all star patch is now where it belongs.

Muffin boy, what's your real name?

Must be game time.

My bad.

My buddy, mr. Foot locker, will warm your feet.

My darling wife was once a he

My finger's in your mouth, kitty...

My fraternal twin sister's a diabetic...

My hiney is germfree and i love it.

My interjection pertains to the case currently under adjudication.

My sister's wig once had lice

Nice driving skills, pal.

Nice game against saint catherine's today. How many buckets you score?

Nighty night.

No 'tis the season feeling kind of guy

No, hockey players get up too early.

No, it was me.

No, let me do it right now.

No, mr. Chang. It's me, whitey duvall.

No, no, go on. Whitey, i'm mesmerized.

No, no, no.

No, officer. I'm just going to say good night to my car...

No. He made me see how great whitey is and how neglectful we've all been.

Nobody does care about me.

Nobody in this town even knows you exist!

Nobody needs a uni brow.

Not again!

Not one of those places has made you change an ounce for the better.

Not today.

Nothing a little metal plate couldn't fix.

Now he's just a loner and a liar

Now i can understand wrapping the cornmeal around the hot dog...

Now say what i told you to say.

Now set yourself and shoot.

Now you go to jail and marry big, smelly man.

Now, behave yourself, and don't stay up too late.

Now, both of you cop a squat next to me and let's observe.

Now, go live happily ever after or i'll dropkick the teeth out of your mouth.

Now, he's just a 33 year old, crazy ******* guy...

Now, i assume you've done your pre game stretching.

Now, i'd like to make this work out.

Numb nuts is here.

Of all

Of course whitey wouldn't understand what getting flipped off means.

Oh, boy.

Oh, boy.

Oh, boy. Let's just soak our feet, brother.

Oh, feel my hiney?

Oh, god.

Oh, mama!

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god.

Oh, my god. Slow down. Come on. I'm scared.

Oh, my.

Oh, my. You poor, poor boy. What in heaven's name did you do?

Oh, no.

Oh, no. You're going to make me walk 10 feet? That's where i live, idiot!

Oh, really? Because i thought that was high sticking.

Oh, shut up!

Okay, but i'm making an inventory...

Okay, he's useless.

Okay, let's give the little guy some support.

Okay, mrs. Triple nipple... i mean, mrs. Selman.

Okay, that's it. Game over. Nobody wants to see an old man die.

Okay, well, let's keep looking.

Okay?

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. That's good, but don't forget your hammies.

Okay. Well, i'll use it here.

One davey stone around here is enough.

One more basket and it's chow time, boys.

One more thing.

One more thing.

One thumbtack popped all eight of my back tires.

One. Two.

One. Two. Three.

Oops.

Or give sugar cookies to miss diabetes

Or it's a technical foul

Or it's a technical foul

Or ruthlessly made fun of his feet or voice or sister or shortness

Or various odd jobs he does around town for free or at most a dollar

Orangutan, you're playing, not reffing.

Peanuts for me?

Please let there be a miracle.

Please, just let me speak for one second.

Pukesberry.

Put it up, ben.

Put it up, benny.

Put it up.

Put me down! Put me down!

Roger on that. Over.

Run, hippie! Run!

Saint ignatius is number one!

See you later, smell.

See, i told you.

See, that wasn't a charge. It was actually blocking.

Shaving the chest.

She had the courage to move back a month ago to try and raise her boy alone.

She's going through a tough time now.

She's right. And then we'll send him up the river.

Shut up!

Smell you later, poopsicle.

Smile! Your mom wants to take a picture.

So i wanted to return this to you.

So i was kind of thinking...

So i was thinking...

So now we'll bring in the big gun

So old whitey's up early every day, searching the town for odd jobs...

So she's available?

So sweet.

So why don't you go stay with them?

So, davey, did you play the hockey when you were a child?

Somebody stop that guy!

Something that should have happened 20 years ago.

Sorry, i'm not up on modern technology.

Sorry! That one caught me by surprise.

Sorry.

Sound to me like you are all on crack

Sounds good to me.

Special delivery for whitey duvall, sugar free doughnuts.

Stone, what the heck are we going to do with you?

Stone, you screwed up for the last time.

Take as much time as you need, whitey.

Take it, davey. It might have money in it. Over.

Take it! Take it!

Take that back.

Technical foul! Technical foul!

Thank god.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you.

Thanks for the ride, patchy.

Thanks, honey.

Thanks, whitey. And i'll pretend i never heard you say that.

That 10 year sentence i promised you starts tonight.

That burns!

That fool's in the china dragon...

That kind of shooting makes me want to do the robot dance.

That place always makes me feel better.

That won't be necessary.

That's a big 10 4, davey.

That's a game boy, you idiot.

That's a good look for you. But for health reasons, i should spray you off.

That's a lady, and you will not speak about her that way!

That's a technical foul

That's a technical foul

That's a technical foul

That's a technical foul

That's all right, just keep your elbow in. Now stick it, kid.

That's all right. Just try to stay confident, and if i say shoot it, shoot it.

That's it. I'm calling the judge.

That's my man.

That's my man.

That's my problem.

That's not a lobster bib, eleanore. That's a germ protector for your tushy.

That's the reaction i thought i'd get.

That's the saddest story i've ever heard.

That's the strangest thing i've ever seen.

That's up to who the town votes for. Could be you or me or anybody.

That's what happens when you hit the bottle.

That's why i'm here, whitey. I'm here to fix a big mistake.

The award for most impressive growth goes to a kid who began at 4 foot 2.

The bad news is we stand no chance of winning this game.

The criminal?! Did he force you to bring him here so he could molest you?

The first time i kissed her

The good news is it's Chanukkah, so you'll all get presents tonight anyway.

The jcc was down by 24 points.

The mayor is very funny.

The mayor? Was it about the ruffians who stole my liz taylor wig?

The only time i had sex was on the phone

The only way that'll happen is if you take all the shots.

The reason i bring this up to you

The saga continues.

The schoolyard's where we were

The short man who's kind and the donkey's behind.

The voting has begun for the highest honor anyone in town could receive.

The way you are

The whistle, she's on the prowl

The worst has happened. I'm covered in human feces.

Then a tiny, little man rushed to my side

There are certain rules which apply in one's life

There are some buffoons out there who actually can't stand the holiday season.

There it is!

There's a surprise in there you'll like.

There's nothing to say. My parents are dead.

These are desperate times.

These babies make my taste buds do double daffies, for gosh sakes.

They definitely have furry underwear.

They died.

They make a nice couple.

They said you weren't there, but to try back later.

They should have locked him up for good.

They tickle.

They took my wig

They'll laugh and they'll dance and they'll pee in their pants

They're scratching up my floor. Here comes a seizure.

They're soaking the carpet.

This guy's sport always was and always will be basketball.

This here stuff just numbs the pain it don't make it go away

This is embarrassing.

This is going to scare her silly.

This is the happiest seizure of my life.

This is the most beautiful place i've ever seen.

Three.

Through basketball or the mall

Till i told him he was useless

Time to cry, davey. Over.

To me they're just something to shoot

To show that we care

Tom, come up here and get this sucker.

Tommy, nothing personal, but whitey should have won the patch tonight.

Tonight whitey was counting on this town

Turns out they were on their way to the ball game...

Twelve year old

Twenty years of drinking destroyed the basketball lobe of his brain.

Twenty years?

Unfortunately, this fairy tale doesn't have a happy ending.

Until a wrist shot caught him in the back of the skull.

Wake up, kids. Our hot and sour friend is here.

Want this to end

Was that jennifer friedman?

Watch the ice, eleanore. Don't slip.

We all heard what happened at the skating rink today

We got no beef with you guys.

We love you, tommy!

We love you, whitey!

We should all rot in hell

We should go to the mall.

We weren't there

We'll see. Your ball.

We'll take that.

We're coming!

We're here to right our wrong

Well, all right. Look at all that beautiful, white stuff come down.

Well, i'll never spin a dreidel, but i'll always throw an egg

Well, i'm a snowmobile stealing

Well, if he didn't, we can at least sit in front of it.

Well, if you guys don't mind...

Well, maybe they're onto something that you should give a try

Well, over there's my family home

Well, right now i'm going to go for another restaurant record: Longest burp.

Well, thank you, but he asked first.

Well, then cover the nerd.

Well, there's nothing to apologize for, stone, because you were right.

Well, while whitey and eleanore are getting ready for the banquet...

Well, will you look at that. It's a jackass in the box.

Well, you can help me with my dream.

What 12 year old kid would? He basically shut down.

What a bizarre matchup. Good luck, whitey. You'll need it.

What a crushing blow to whitey

What a shot.

What are you getting at?

What are you getting at?

What can we do you for, bub?

What do you want, stone?

What he do, steal beer for everyone?

What other options do you got, mr. Rockefeller?

What the heck is happening right now?

What the hey?

What, no whistle on that one, ref?

What? Get out of here. I'm leaving.

What's good about it? Everything. You want a pair of socks?

What's good about this place?

What's happening?

What's the matter with the way i live my life? Huh, jennifer?!

What's with the dunkin' munchkin?

When he got there i said, i can't believe you thought i was serious

When he wasn't looking

When i was a kid playing youth league ball for palmer episcopal...

When whitey brought up your sad past you snapped and walked away

When you feel nearly 5 foot 3!

When you have enough lights to make your house look like the vegas strip...

Where am i going, baby? Where am i going? Oh, snap. Oh, snap.

Where are you?! Home reading your baby boy a bedtime story...

Where's it going now?

Which month was that in?

Whipping out my big, white, scary moon

Whitey came over with a hanger

Whitey, if you want to work with this punk, then god bless you.

Whitey, they were giving out lobster bibs in the bathroom.

Whitey, we went over this two months ago.

Who said that?

Who you talking to? Having one of them hippie dippy mushroom flashbacks?

Who's out there? Do we need to call the police?

Who's there?

Whoa, little lverson.

Whoa! Whoa! Hang in there, betsy! We'll make it! Whoa!

Whoa. Don't even think of coming on this floor with those hard soles, pally.

Why are you eating that?

Why are you hiding over there?

Why can't he just be like he used to be?

Why do you want to know?

Why don't you show your feminine side and have yourself a cry

Why not sentence him to be a referee in training for youth basketball?

Why the hell are we at the mall?

Why was she looking at me like that?

Why would we give whitey duvall the patch? So he could use it as a blanket?

Why? You're smaller than me? I didn't notice that.

With a shot of whiskey.

With joy

With pleasure!

With your sister, friends or imaginary wife

Without my wig, i look like an owl hoo! Hoo!

Won't you dance with me

Would you three show whitey and i...

Wow, benjamin, an etch a sketch. Not too shabby.

Wow!

Wow. Just when you started to really like davey, he has a butthole relapse.

Wow. Maybe on night four the Chanukkah monster will take a big crap on your bed.

Y'all can bite my dink

Yeah, good coverage.

Yeah, it is.

Yeah, that was weird, wasn't it?

Yeah!

Yeah.

Yeah. Then i have to figure out how to rebuild our giant menorah and santa.

Yes, i'm eli wolstan...

Yes, so precious.

Yes.

You actually give a crap about winning a patch?

You are right. That was gross.

You ate last week

You ate last week

You beautiful

You can run from whitey, but you ain't gonna run from us.

You don't like that? How about you throw something at me. I dare you.

You fill our lives

You go to sleep in dukesberry, you wake up in pukesberry.

You got a dream? What is it?

You got no school, you can eat like a pig and people give you stuff.

You gotta be kidding me!

You hoodlums better bring my wig back! I know it was you!

You just got to keep your elbows in.

You know, eleanore really does look like an owl.

You know, i don't like me very much either.

You know, i read recently in reader's digest...

You know, my mother doesn't like you very much.

You know, stone, if my imaginary wife and i ever have a son...

You leave me no choice. I'll really have to crack down hard this time.

You like it when i hold you like this?

You need a fancy doodad?

You see, i knew this young man years ago...

You see...

You should let me be your date.