Hot Fuzz (2007) Edit

A bloody busybody!

A dateless bargain to engrossing death.

A large area of land on the outskirts of Sandford,

A love struck Romeo sings a streetsus serenade.

A Mr. Blower left you tickets for Romeo and Juliet tonight.

A retail park.

Absolute tosh, wasn't it?

Academically excelled in theoretical course work and final year examinations.

Achieved the highest arrest record for any officer in the Met.

Actually, he was arrested for selling drugs to students.

Actually, I did notice some minor graffiti on the fountain.

Actually, I just wanted to ask, "What's your perfect Sunday?"

Actually, I wasn't talking about him.

Actually, Nicholas, you might as well take a break.

Actually, there's something I need to tell you.

After an article Tim Messenger wrote in the Sandford Citizen.

After which, nothing will stand in our way.

Again let me extend my sincere apologies for earlier.

All right, in the meantime, why don't you check out a few of Martin Blower's clients?

All right, pipe down, big one.

All right.

All right.

All too many have defected to the big Megamart in Buford Abbey.

Also, because talking to them is an uphill struggle, isn't it, Dad?

Am I going completely mad?

Amanda Paver, headmistress of Sandford Primary.

Amazing bit in Point Break where they jump over fences.

And advanced cycling.

And annoyingly, the understudies are actually professional actors.

And anyway, what makes you think I could dislodge part of the church roof?

And are they as big as he is?

And assumed you had time on your hands.

And discovered that I should be in the pub.

And he had one thing you haven't got.

And he's firing his gun up in the air, he's like...

And help us bring an end to this absurd story.

And I can assure you it is not in the least bit amusing.

And I have the good grace to know which is which.

And I think with a little deliberation we can figure out what links these deaths.

And I thought I might take them up on it.

And I'm afraid you're gonna have to come with me.

And if you still feel the same in the morning, I give you my word, I'll get right on to it.

And incinerated an old man in his own house.

And isn't it true that two of your own employees

And it didn't occur to you to mention this before?

And it's driven you round the bend.

And it's only now that I'm starting to realize how unridiculous it all is.

And killed anyone who's threatened to change that.

And lives up Summer Street with his mum and his sister.

And made good your escape utilizing your impressive skills as a fun runner.

And not think to apply the brakes?

And of Eve D****r and Martin Blower on April 28th.

And potential disloyalty from fickle customers,

And righteous and for the good of humankind.

And Sergeant Popwell was an exceptional officer, truly exceptional.

And Sheree played a cadaver in Prime Suspect.

And Sheree portrayed a cadaver in Prime Suspect.

And so Eve deserved to die too?

And tells me this land's very valuable.

And that is Saxon.

And that's what the "team" is gonna make of this.

And the christening will be a week on Saturday and we're all invited.

And the kiss was the only convincing moment in it.

And the next name is...

And then I said, "Playtime's over," and I hit him with the Peace Lily.

And then that reporter, God rest him, finds out about the route

And then we get forensics in to do a thorough sweep of the house.

And there's no reason we can't be civil with each other.

And there's no reason we can't be civil with each other.

And this is one Doris Thatcher.

And this is where it all happens.

And until you find a person you care about more than your job, you never will.

And what about Tim Messenger? What was his crime?

And what can I get you that isn't a cranberry juice?

And what's more, I know who did it.

And what's upstairs?

And whatever the cost, we would make Sandford great again.

And why the move, if you don't mind me asking?

And yet we respond by not taking a single punitive measure?

And you won't be an amazing police officer until you understand that.

Andy!

Andy!

Angel!

Annette, that Sergeant Angel's back. Check out his horse.

Annette, that Sergeant Angel's coming into your shop.

Annoying.

Another beautiful day in God's country.

Any questions?

Anything to energize my workforce.

Apart from the summer of 1979 when I wanted to be Kermit the Frog.

Apparently, they want to build a big shopping center or something.

Are you saying this is all about winning the Best Village Award?

Are you? He isn't even from round here.

Arresting kids twice my size for littering and spitting.

As it is about fighting crime.

Ask yourself, why has he got his hat pulled down like that?

At least consider interviewing the widow.

At the scene of the Blower D****r death, on the outskirts of Sandford,

Attended Hendon College of Police Training.

Awful.

Back off! Back off!

Bang!

Bang! Bang!

Became heavily involved in a number of extra vocational activities.

Because "accident" implies there's nobody to blame.

Because he was knocking off Eve D****r from the council, God rest her,

Before he becomes just another crime statistic.

Before you could say, "Gypsy scum," we were knee deep in dog muck,

Before you go jumping the Kalashnikov.

Being a woman has nothing to do with it.

Ben Fletcher fell on his pitchfork the other week.

Besides, we have to do a considerable amount of paperwork.

Besides, you were the one who suggested we take a break.

Birds.

Brainwashed into naivety by an old man with a murderous obsession.

But also inferred that Eve's connections at the council

But I never forgot the clear sense of right and wrong

But if they're in here, it stops them getting into trouble out there.

But it seemed she was set on moving away.

But it won't be just me, will it?

But it's been impounded as evidence.

But the fact is, you've been making us all look bad.

But this isn't London. Oh, yes, please, Danny.

But you can't go around chopping down other people's hedges without permission.

But you've always been here.

But you've been rather letting the side down.

But, sir, I'm certain.

But, sir, I'm certain.

By the power of Grey Skull.

By the power of Grey Skull.

Bye bye.

Can I get a quick shot for the Sandford Citizen?

Can I get cell four open, please?

Can you handle this, Sergeant Fisher? We're gonna go after the big boss.

Catch me later!

Certainly.

Chief, we've had a report of some hippy types

Churchyard. 3:00.

Civilian liaison with the Neighborhood Watch Alliance.

Close down the road until the ambulance crew arrives,

Cocks.

Come back to London.

Come on, boys. Leave Sergeant Angel alone, he's working.

Come on, let's have a mosey around.

Come on, Nicholas. You haven't got it in you.

Come on, Sergeant, you've gotta accept it was just another nasty accident.

Complete mess.

Congratulations to you and to Mrs. Blower.

Constable Butterman, this is not the time for personal errands.

Consumed with concern for your business

Could you tell the Inspector I've arrived, please?

Couldn't see his face, could I? I'm not made of eyes.

Cousin Leslie was a terrible shame.

Crusty jugglers.

Crusty jugglers.

Crusty jugglers. Crusty jugglers.

Dad just said it was his special club, he...

Dad.

Danny, believe me, it's not something you ever get used to.

Danny, can you open four?

Danny, I think I'm on to something.

Danny, no.

Danny, you'll do as you're told.

Danny!

Danny!

Danny!

Danny?

Danny. Danny, just stay here, okay? And watch him, and call your dad.

Dear Lord!

Despite the fact you live and work in the center of the village.

Did he mean me or that?

Did you go to his house? Did you read his articles?

Did you shoot anybody?

Did you want us to go through the whole phone book?

Displayed great aptitude in field exercises.

Do feel free to spool through.

Do forgive me. I'm something of a Wild West nut.

Do you really think this is murder?

Do yourself a favor. Sleep on it.

Doctor Hatcher reported no misadventure and Mrs. Blower has four alibis.

Does Bob look like the kind of person I'd go out with?

Doesn't it seem a little strange that Martin Blower would lose control of his car

Don't expect me to believe you'd let it end the same way.

Don't get up.

Don't go being a twat now.

Drop in and see me sometime. My discounts are criminal.

Drop them.

Drop your weapons!

Editor and journalist at The Sandford Citizen.

Eve works in the local council, Sergeant. Quite the lady in the know.

Everybody and their mums is packing round here.

Everything's gonna be fine.

Everything's gonna be fine.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Fair enough.

Fancied himself as a property developer.

Far from all the sorts of noise of the city.

Fascist!

Feeling lucky, Sergeant?

Fifty three.

Fifty three.

Fire to destroy all you've done.

For the first time in my life, you know, I'm glad.

For the last 20 years, the village has been controlled by Frank and the NWA.

Forty.

Frank, this shit just got real.

Frank, this whole thing started because you lost somebody you loved.

Freeze!

From that moment on, I swore that I would do her proud.

From this command center I can see what the whole village is up to.

Fruit attack!

Fuck are you on about?

Geographical location shouldn't factor in the application of the law.

Get a look at his arse.

Get out of my village!

Get out.

Get the CSI down here.

Get us back to the station, now!

Go back to London. There's nothing you can do.

God rest the lot of them, had been talking to.

Good work, everyone.

Good. Proceed to the castle.

Graduated Canterbury University in 1993 with a double first in politics and sociology.

Graduated with distinction into the Metropolitan Police Service.

Greg over there was an extra in Straw Dogs

Gun fights. Car chases. Proper action and shit.

Gypsy scum. Travelers.

Hag!

Hang about, hang about.

Hang on, I don't remember telling you that.

Hanging around. Loitering. Sitting.

Happily some poison doth yet hang on them.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you.

Has it? Like what?

Have a nice time.

Have you ever fired your gun up in the air and gone...

Have you ever wondered why the crime rate in Sandford is so low?

Have you listened to anything that I've said?

Have you seen a lot of action, Sergeant Angel?

Having slipped and tragically broken his neck.

He bought me a police pedal car when I was five.

He can't be cold. Why the extra layer? Maybe he's trying to hide something.

He does for this one.

He hasn't.

He says, "He reckons you got something there."

He shot a crack head with a Kalashnikov.

He sounds like a good bloke.

He thinks you're talking a load of shit. Swings and roundabouts, isn't it?

He will tell you exactly the same thing as I have.

He's appointed himself judge, jury and executioner.

He's my dad. Take my car.

He's not gonna get back up again?

He's not in yet.

Hello there, Nicholas, Frank Butterman here, your new Inspector.

Hello, Miss Tiller.

Hello, Nicholas.

Hello, there.

Hello, there.

Hello. Hello.

Her horticultural expertise helped put Sandford on the map.

Here, maybe it was our old friend, the cactus thief.

Here, what else you got, Crockett and Tubby?

Here's to my love.

Hey, big one, playtime's over.

Hey, come on, silly bollocks, get them in.

Hey, give me that!

Hey, great. I've got something to show you.

Hey, that weren't me.

Hey, that weren't me.

Hey, we did get a little drunk. Did you get it?

Hey, why can't we say "accident" again?

Hey. Hey, what's happening? What's going on?

Hi hi.

Hi, hi, Tim Messenger.

His...

Hold on, Danny, just hold on.

Hold on, it's gonna be fine. It's gonna be fine.

Hopefully we won't see too much of each other over the coming months.

How about another beer?

How about you put the teacher in handcuffs?

How can this be for the greater good?

How can this be for the greater good?

How could I possibly be in several places at once?

How could I possibly be in several places at once?

How do you do, Sergeant?

How's Janine?

However, there was a loose end.

I admire your enthusiasm and far be it from me to stifle your flair,

I am sure that all of you will have noticed the return of a blight to our streets.

I beg your pardon?

I beg your pardon?

I bet you can't wait to jump into Sergeant Popwell's grave.

I brought you into this world, I think it's rather fitting

I can come back, and I can bring the blue fury

I can come back.

I can never find my scissors.

I can show you how.

I chased a suspect from the scene. Innocent people don't run!

I could've given you the tour. I've been round the station a few times.

I couldn't help but recall your comments at the theater on the previous evening.

I did miss a few dinners. You know, parties, a birthday or two.

I didn't know we had a mounted division.

I don't know how many times. It'll be good for you.

I don't know nothing about no skelingtons.

I don't know. Dad does it.

I don't think I know how.

I don't think that gives off the right signals.

I don't think that's a good idea. Do you?

I expect you're wondering why we call them the Andes.

I feel like I should say something smart.

I got beaten up a lot when I was young but it didn't stop me.

I had to prove to myself that the law could be proper

I haven't really got that much family round here, save for Cousin Sissy.

I hear you're quite the marksman.

I hope you're not planning on driving that.

I just can't believe Leslie's dead. How did it happen?

I just can't believe Leslie's dead. How did it happen?

I just don't think we should rule it out, that's all.

I kind of like it here.

I know, I'm outside.

I know. Bob told me.

I know. I'm at work.

I may not be a man of God, Reverend, but I know right, and I know wrong,

I mean it!

I mean, what made you wanna be a policeman?

I might need to refer to it later.

I must go to the little boys' room.

I must say I was rather admiring your handiwork last night.

I myself host a life drawing class at the Village Hall.

I need to talk to you about George Merchant. Alone.

I personally relish the competition of another store.

I prefer to think my office is out on the street.

I reckon he's got something there.

I refer, of course, to the extremely irritating Living Statue.

I say we go in through the front entrance, take the place aisle by aisle.

I see.

I see.

I should be the one to take you out of it.

I simply wanted to say how lovely it is to see you supporting your local store.

I think after my mum died, it's what he wanted, you know, keep me close by.

I think our Mr. Merchant tried to have a little fry up and left the gas on.

I think she'd probably kill herself all over again.

I think you would've made a great muppet.

I think you're talking a load of old shit.

I thought I made it clear to you how I feel about firearms.

I thought it was about rapping people on the knuckles

I thought you was a goner.

I thought you were my husband.

I told him several times, you shouldn't eat late at night.

I too have reason to believe she favors the older gent.

I want to ask you, would you read a homily at Sunday Service?

I wanted to be like Uncle Derek.

I was buying Constable Butterman a Japanese Peace Lily for his birthday.

I was extremely shocked when I looked at my watch

I was just about to pop off, actually.

I was thinking of a different shop.

I was wondering, do you have any Japanese Peace Lilies?

I would not wanna be him in the morning.

I wouldn't give you the satisfaction.

I'd come to know Martin and Eve very well of late.

I'd like to talk to the Inspector.

I'd need something conclusive.

I'd need something conclusive.

I'd quite like to keep it that way.

I'll deal with the press, Sergeant.

I'll make sure everyone gets their just deserts.

I'll make sure everyone gets their just deserts.

I'll tell them you'll ring them back.

I'll tell you how this is gonna end!

I'm a slasher and I must be stopped.

I'm all right.

I'm also arresting you on suspicion of the murder of Tim Messenger on May 1st,

I'm arresting you under suspicion of conspiracy to commit murder.

I'm going to need some ice cream.

I'm Joyce Cooper. I trust you had a pleasant trip. Fascist.

I'm just calling with details of your accommodation.

I'm just saying, things aren't always as simple as they look.

I'm not jumping into anyone's grave.

I'm not taking orders from you anymore.

I'm not talking about that, I'm talking about the others.

I'm playing the eponymous hero, you see.

I'm simply suggesting that, you know, Peter be given a second chance

I'm sorry, sir, I don't follow.

I'm sorry, sir?

I'm sorry.

I'm sure he's going to learn a valuable lesson.

I'm sure if we bashed your head in, all sorts of secrets would come tumbling out.

I've experienced my fair share, yes.

If I do indeed now own the land belonging to...

If she could see what you've become,

If there were no skid marks it follows

If there's anything you need, just let us know.

If we can't have her, no one can.

If we don't come down hard on these clowns,

If we don't come down hard on these clowns...

If we let you carry on running round town,

If we let you carry on running round town,

If you had paid attention to me in school,

If you wanna wade through every copy of the Sandford bloody Citizen, be our guest.

In 2001 began active duty with the renowned SO 19 armed response unit.

In a lovely little place that I think has won Village of the Year

In the city maybe. Nobody's gonna stab you in here, Sergeant.

In the execution of unquestionable moral authority.

In the name of the law!

Indeed, you do.

Is anything I've told you in the last two weeks

Is it?

Is that everything? Sir?

Is there now? Twenty nine.

Is this what you really, really want?

Isn't that right, Danny?

Isn't there a Sergeant's position here in London?

It all started with my Uncle Derek. He was a Sergeant in the Met.

It can get awfully hairy out there.

It oxygenates the room, helps you think, relieves stress.

It was exactly the same thing.

It was from that moment, I was destined to be a police officer.

It was more about me being obsessed with the job.

It was the single most painful experience of my life.

It was very enjoyable.

It wasn't actually my choice.

It would appear a number of your patrons are under age.

It would appear the heavens have opened.

It's a bit of a blind spot, I'm afraid.

It's a pity you didn't do the same to those bloody hoodies.

It's a well known fact that the church roof is in dire need of repair.

It's about two foot tall.

It's all about the greater good.

It's all right, Andy. It's just Bolognese!

It's all right, it's all right. There's nothing to see.

It's been a long time since I last set eyes.

It's Dave.

It's Frank.

It's hardly in keeping with the village's rustic esthetic, is it?

It's high time you realized that. You and your monkey.

It's made all the more disturbing as the Village of the Year contest looms.

It's not ours, love.

It's not ready.

It's not that long ago we were talking about getting married.

It's over, Danny.

It's over.

It's the raffle with a very special guest presenter.

It's your job, isn't it? Detect!

It's...

Its needs are simple.

Janet Barker has just given birth to twins.

Janine used to say I love my Lily more than I loved her.

Janine, I've been transferred. I'm moving away for a while.

Jesus Christ!

Jog on.

Joyce will discover the Sergeant lying on the wet floor of his bathroom,

Just hang on, hang on!

Just kidding. I'm Simon Skinner. I run the local supermarché.

Just stop writing, will you?

Just walk in and arrest the whole village?

Kenneth!

Knew where the new bypass road is going

Last night's incident will require something rather more serious.

Leslie Tiller was fucking murdered!

Let us stop this mindless violence.

Let's just say that we won't be short of Chunky Monkey for the next month.

Let's just wait till Doctor Hatcher comes back with something,

Like in the films.

Like the biscuits, isn't it?

Little Brian Libby found them, out on his paper round.

Locker room.

Longer we wait, more time they've got to mobilize.

Look forward to meeting you anon. Cheerio.

Look, I appreciate your position, Mr. Webley,

Look, I can assure you it wasn't my intention to upset the apple cart.

Look, I'm merely trying to explain why I might have exceeded the speed limit.

Look, Mr. Treacher's got his big coat on again.

Look, you're right, I apologize.

Made a fortune in kitchen goods. Built that monstrosity on Norris Avenue.

Manager's office. Sergeant Angel.

Many people hold down several jobs.

Marcus Carter's big brother said he'd fingered her up the duck pond.

Martin Blower represents damn near most of the village.

Martin Blower was clearly having an affair with Eve D****r.

Martin was less concerned with the reputation of the village

May their heads be struck from their shoulders for such disloyalty.

Maybe it's time to give it up, sir.

Maybe they were all accidents. People have accidents every day.

Maybe you are.

Maybe you did it.

Messing with the recycling bins at the supermarket.

Michael, will you escort the Sergeant off the premises when he's quite finished?

Michael?

Michael? Are you there?

Michael? Is everything okay?

Might make her privy to important information.

More in keeping with the village's rustic esthetic.

Morning, Sergeant.

Morning, Sergeant.

Morning, Sergeant.

Morning, Sergeant.

Morning, Sergeant.

Morning.

Most importantly, it is about procedural correctness

Most likely lost control, left the road there and then ended up here.

Most recently in December when wounded by a man dressed as Father Christmas.

Most times they are.

Move.

Mr. Messenger, a statement will be issued shortly.

Mr. Porter, what's your wine selection?

Mr. Skinner to the Manager's office. Manager's office. Mr. Skinner.

Mr. Skinner, a baby's sicked up in aisle six.

Mr. Skinner, do you mind telling me

Mr. Skinner, what you do with your land is of no concern of mine,

Mr. Staker. Yeah, Mr. Peter Ian Staker.

Mr. Treacher?

Must have hit the sign at some speed. Took the whole top off.

My dad, or a loony London police officer.

My suspicions were first aroused when you appeared

My teenage years studying ballet are well known.

My, he is tenacious, isn't he?

My, my. Here come the fuzz.

Namely a Sergeant Knickerless Asswipe and a Constable Fanny Batterbum.

Narp!

Nasty way to go.

Nasty way to go.

Nasty way to go.

Needless to say I never went near it again. I just let it rust.

Never mind. Hey, watch this.

Nevertheless had uncovered important information about...

Nevertheless, you could have utilized the vehicle removal truck for your own ends.

Nicholas, Danny, you know what to do.

Nicholas, Frank again. One other thing about your cottage.

Nicholas, hello. Reverend Shooter.

Nicholas, this is Tom Weaver.

Nicholas, we're offering you a smashing position with a delightful cottage,

Nicholas, you're an exceptional officer. But I've seen this before.

Nicholas! Nicholas!

Nicholas. Glad I caught you.

No caffeine after midday.

No luck catching them killers, then?

No luck catching them killers, then?

No luck catching them...

No, I have not ever fired my gun up in the air and gone...

No, I have not!

No, I used this.

No, I... I meant here.

No, I'm sorry. I'm gonna have to...

No, I'm... I'm...

No, it's just a lot of junk.

No, listen. Wait, wait, wait, Michael, wait, listen to me. Listen, listen.

No, Nicholas, I'm afraid it is you

No, sorry, you were talking about the offer?

No, the gateau is for misplacing his helmet the other week.

No, you're right, you do have that rubber plant.

No!

No!

No.

No.

No.

No.

No.

Nobody tells me nothing.

Not exactly.

Not exactly.

Not least those heathens at Buford Abbey.

Not to mention persistent errors.

Not when we had two semi professionals waiting in the wings.

Notably, urban pacification and riot control.

Now, come on, Sergeant, it's not your job to investigate this incident, is it?

Now, despite my comments about "beheading" customers,

Now, how about a trip to the Andes?

Now, I know what you're going to say,

Now, let me get this straight.

Now, my perfect Sunday is a lovely long lie in...

Now, my perfect Sunday would begin with...

Now, Officer, I am a respected solicitor so there's no need to...

Now, quick announcement before we begin.

Now, quick announcement before we begin.

Now, since it's your first day and it's 11:30, I'd say that's lunch.

Now, you wouldn't, by any chance, be the new policeman?

Now, you'll all be delighted to hear

Now.

Now.

Now...

Of course we all appreciate your efforts,

Of course.

Of course. Cheers.

Of course. I simply spied you loitering in organic produce

Of the Sandford bloody Citizen, be our guest.

Officer Walker, stay here with Saxon and hold everything down.

Officer.

Officers, arrest that man.

Officers, let's go.

Official vocab guidelines state that "force" is too aggressive.

Oh, and how did you establish that?

Oh, bless you.

Oh, but I am, "Cousin Sissy."

Oh, can I have your autograph, please?

Oh, come on, Doctor Sherlock, they were accidents.

Oh, come, come, Sergeant.

Oh, dear.

Oh, dirty bastard!

Oh, fuck off, Grasshopper.

Oh, God, no!

Oh, God.

Oh, good grief.

Oh, he'll be having nightmares for a while.

Oh, he'll be in bits tomorrow.

Oh, he's got shorts on.

Oh, I beg to differ, Mr. Weaver.

Oh, I don't know. Comes in handy every so often.

Oh, I wouldn't say that.

Oh, maybe we should go home.

Oh, murder, murder, murder. Change the fucking record.

Oh, my God. What happened to your Peace Lily?

Oh, no!

Oh, Officers.

Oh, oh, Sergeant Angel?

Oh, please, please, come with me, will you?

Oh, right, right, wasn't your choice to come down here and tell me how to do my job.

Oh, Sergeant Angel? Someone from London called for you.

Oh, she was ever so good.

Oh, this is not my wife. This is Miss D****r. My leading lady.

Oh, we got red or white.

Oh, yeah, he was a prickly customer, weren't he?

Oh, you're an atheist?

Okay, we get a proper cordon up, we let the fire crews finish their stuff,

Okay, what's his story?

Okay? It's Nicholas, by the way.

Okay.

Okay. They're in.

Okay. What about this guy?

Old Arthur Webley's been clipping hedgerows that don't belong to him.

On the eve of the adjudicator's arrival, some travelers moved into Callahan Park.

Operate the vehicle removal service for the council?

Or I swear to God, you'll be explaining how Danny tripped over

Or you can be real police officers,

Our friend, The Living Statue, was here on Saturday.

Our jobs.

Our once great paper had become riddled with tabloid journalism.

Out.

P.I. Staker. Right. Piss taker. Come on!

Pain in the arse.

PC Bob Walker.

PC Walker?

Perhaps a wound you sustained on a piece of broken glass this very evening.

Perhaps hoping you might discover the route of the proposed Sandford Bypass.

Perhaps you might like to join us for a shoot one day.

Pint of lager, please, Roy.

Please excuse me. Michael!

Please, don't be childish.

Poison? I'll kiss thy lips.

Police Constable Nicholas Angel. Born and schooled in London.

Police officer, yes. I'm Nicholas Angel.

Police work is as much about preventing crime

Police work is not about proper action or shit.

Probably bought the pedal car with the proceeds.

Proceeded to improve skill base with courses in advanced driving

Quickly established an effectiveness and popularity within the community.

Quite appalling.

Quite right.

Real name, Michael Armstrong.

Really? How so?

Received a bravery award for efforts in the resolution of Operation Crackdown.

Received the Baton of Honor.

Right you are, my love.

Right.

Right.

Right.

Right. And where has the swan escaped from exactly?

Right. I'm taking you to the station.

Riot room.

Robin Hatcher, our resident sawbones.

Roger that!

Roger that.

Romeo not Juliet.

Romeo, Romeo, a pint of bitter for Romeo?

Roy!

Said it was by way of an apology.

Same person.

Sandford is a lie, Doris.

Sandford's hardly a fitting place for such an exceptional officer.

Satisfactory conclusion to the whole operation.

Sea mine.

See. It's only ever about the job.

Seems like Mr. Merchant tried to have a little fry up and left the gas on.

Seen any murderings, Nicholarse?

Sergeant Angel, at last. Frank Butterman.

Sergeant Angel, hi hi. A quick word?

Sergeant Angel, hi hi. Quick word for the Sandford Citizen.

Sergeant Angel, you came?

Sergeant Angel?

Sergeant Angel. And to what do I owe this pleasure?

Sergeant Angel. Or is it Angle?

Sergeant Angel's been taken care of?

Sergeant Angel's having a spot of bother.

Sergeant Butterman, little hand says it's time to rock and roll.

Sergeant Nicholas Angel.

Sergeant Nicholas Angel. Sandford Police Service.

Sergeant Popwell thought much the same as you.

Sergeant, I kind of like it here.

Sergeant, I wanted you to know that

Sergeant, this is beginning to get embarrassing.

Sergeant, this is the 21st Century.

Sergeant.

Service.

Shame Mr. Skinner doesn't want to press charges.

Shame.

Shark!

She clearly has a thing for older men.

She drove her Datsun Cherry into Sandford Gorge.

She tripped and fell on her own shears.

She tripped and fell on her own shears.

She tripped and fell on her own shears.

She was head of the Women's Institute, chair of the floral committee.

She was in my year at school. Always had a thing for her.

She worked round the clock. I've never seen such dedication.

Shit!

Shouldn't that be "drink to their memories"?

Silence, Danny!

Simon Skinner, I'm arresting you on suspicion of the murder of Leslie Tiller.

Sir, I don't think driving under the influence can be called a "little indiscretion."

Skinner just sent someone to kill me, and, now, now he's gone somewhere.

Skip.

So he sends round his legal fella, Martin Blower, God rest him,

So I thought I might take them up on the offer and move to Buford Abbey.

So jog on.

So thrilled you accepted my invitation.

So, congratulations to her.

So, what do we reckon?

So, what do we reckon? Angel?

So, what made you choose Sandford then, Sergeant Angel?

So, with them having passed on, I decided to sell it on myself

So...

Somebody call the police!

Someone's in for a surprise at 3:00, ladies and gentlemen.

Something like, something out of Backdraft.

Something that placed you at the scene of the crime.

Sorry, Chief, won't waste any more police time.

Sorry, I am completely lost.

Sorry, I... I just... I just feel like I'm missing out sometimes.

Sorry?

Speaking of which, that was a fair few outlaws you rounded up last night.

Spends his whole life devoted to the refrigerator

Splat the rat.

Splat the rat.

Splat the rat.

Staging the murders as accidents.

Stand back, stand back! There's been a terrible accident.

Start interviewing everyone who was at the fete.

Statistically, Sandford is the safest village in the country.

Stay back!

Stay back! Or the ginger nut gets it!

Still feel like you're missing out?

Stop!

Stop! Stop this, please!

Such a loss.

Suit yourself.

Swan!

Ta da!

Ta da.

Take our minds off of it.

Take out all the little people, you get to waltz off with the cuddly monkey.

Ten times what George Merchant and Martin Blower, God rest them, offered me.

Testing. Testing.

Than a careful and considered approach.

Than he was with his sordid affair with Eve D****r.

Thank you very much for coming, George. Excuse us.

Thank you, Andrews.

Thank you, Andy.

Thank you, Danny.

Thank you, sir.

Thank you.

Thank you. Could I borrow your newspaper?

Thanks for the monkey.

Thanks.

That amount of carnage and mayhem and not incur a considerable amount of paperwork.

That for 300 yards both driver and passenger did nothing to prevent their fate.

That has committed a blatant offense.

That I felt at the wheel of that pedal car.

That if you shoot it, it will blow up?

That is nothing, man.

That is Sergeant Tony Fisher.

That is until the night Mrs. Butterman was taken from me.

That Leslie Tiller tripped and fell on her own shears?

That might be a little hypocritical of me, Reverend.

That the tenacious Sergeant Angel has been taken care of.

That was amazing.

That was brilliant.

That's good though, right?

That's just grossly inappropriate.

That's me after a couple of pints.

That's quite all right, Mr. Blower. Drive safe.

That's right, deactivated!

That's the Fridge Magnate. His name's George Merchant.

That's the whole problem, Danny.

That's what I'm talking about.

The "M" word, Nicholas.

The adjudicators arrive tomorrow. We had to get everything ready.

The Black Forest gateau is on Danny. As punishment for his little indiscretion.

The Dramatic Society is an important feather in our cap.

The figures have gone a little squiffy in your absence, it has to be said.

The first name is Simon Skinner.

The greater good.

The greater good.

The greater good.

The true value of her land.

The truth is far less complex.

Their kiss was the only convincing moment in it.

Then gets killed by an oven.

There hasn't been a recorded murder in Sandford for 20 years.

There were no skid marks at the scene.

There you go.

There you go. It was the swan all along.

There's a reason we accommodate a few of the younglings at the pub.

There's a reason we accommodate a few of the younglings at the pub.

There's a village green.

There's always something going on, Danny.

These accusations are quite meaningless, Sergeant,

These people died for no reason. No reason whatsoever!

They'll make it disappear. Who are they gonna believe?

They're nippers, Tom. They'll come round.

They've lulled everyone into thinking this is a perfect village

Thieving kids and crusty jugglers.

Thirty.

This ain't the city, Mr. Angel. Not everyone's a murdering psychopath.

This is about to go off.

This is James Reaper, who owns Brannigan Farm.

This is Leslie Tiller,

This is something I have to do myself.

This is the best village, Nicholas. You've seen the people.

This is the most important piece of equipment you will ever own.

This notebook has saved my skin more times than I care to mention.

This really hurts.

This shit just got real.

This very evening.

Thought you might wanna do something.

Three cans wins you the squeaky bunny, five cans gets you the floppy lion.

Three people have died in a week.

Through people's gardens, and he goes to shoot Swayze but he can't,

Tim Messenger.

Tim Messenger's tenure as editor of the Sandford Citizen has been unbearable.

Tina here is a table dancer at Flappers.

To some folks from the city that Martin, George and Eve,

To this day holds the Met record for the 100 meter dash.

To us.

To William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet and I'm a little late for the dress rehearsal.

Too cheesy pie. Okay. Gotcha.

Too much of Joyce's lemonade, perhaps.

Trouble in the high street.

Twenty nine.

Twenty seven.

Unless there's anything you're unclear about?

Unless you can back them up with hard evidence.

Unless you gotta water your Peace Lily.

Unless you wanna come in for a cup of coffee?

Up to the... To the castle, I think. I'm gonna... I'm gonna go after him.

Upon discovering she was about to sell up to the developers,

Use your brain.

Very entertaining. But I rather think you've been watching too many films.

Very good. What he said.

Very good. What he said.

Very well.

Wanna do something useful?

Was I going a tad fast, Officer?

We begged him in vain to make his residence

We couldn't have her sharing her green fingers with anybody else.

We don't want any more bloodshed.

We haven't got long.

We just catch the very edge of the explosion.

We just sat through three hours of so called acting, Constable,

We like to let them think they run the place.

We lost the title and Irene lost her mind.

We no longer refer to these incidents as "accidents," they're now "collisions."

We should strike now, while we've got the element of surprise.

We will now be able to concentrate on the eradication of our hoodie infestation.

We... We... We have been trying to reach you for days.

We're actually supposed to call it "the service" now.

We're just hoping to talk to the last people to see Mr. Merchant alive.

We're no longer together, sir.

We're not big fans of the local fish wrapper, are we, Mare?

We're on it, Sergeant.

We've got you a lovely little cottage on Spencer Hill.

Welcome to Sandford.

Well, a few of them may be a month or two south of proper.

Well, a spot of bother up at Ellroy Farm.

Well, actually, I could probably make my own way up. Hag.

Well, all that remains is to welcome you

Well, George Merchant, God rest him, wanted to buy this land,

Well, George Merchant, God rest him, wanted to buy this land,

Well, good job we've got the manpower, Andy?

Well, however you spin this, there's one thing you haven't taken into account.

Well, I have something important to tell you and I didn't wanna do it over the phone.

Well, I have.

Well, I haven't held a firearm for over two years, Mr. Reaper.

Well, I mean, maybe Dad will still let me water it, eh?

Well, I remembered something else you said and all.

Well, I see you've already arrested the whole village.

Well, I shall see you in the morning.

Well, I wanted to tell you in person.

Well, I won't argue that it was a no holds barred,

Well, I'm happy to disappoint you, sir.

Well, if you wanna wade through every copy

Well, it turns out that Martin Blower, God rest him,

Well, it's a swan.

Well, look sharp.

Well, maybe I'm not the one you should be keeping an eye on.

Well, Mr. Webley, this is an extremely dangerous collection.

Well, now, you see, we are staging a homage

Well, official vocab guidelines state that we say "staffing," not "manpower,"

Well, our Inspector requested we attend. So...

Well, she did have a very annoying laugh.

Well, sir, Mr. Skinner feels it would be better not to prosecute an individual

Well, that's as may be, but the law's the law and they'll have to go.

Well, that's quite all right.

Well, that's that.

Well, that's the way the cookie crumbles.

Well, then, you're packed already.

Well, this is me.

Well, we can't accept gifts from somebody we've officially rebuked. So...

Well, well, well, I see we have visitors.

Well, well, well, I see we have visitors.

Well, you know, I mean, maybe we should do something to celebrate.

Well, you've always wanted to transfer to the country.

Well, you've got me there.

Well, you've got me there.

What a cunt.

What about you? What made you wanna become a police officer?

What am I going to do with you?

What are you suggesting?

What did he say?

What did you think of that?

What do you mean by "this one"?

What do you mean, he doesn't wanna press charges?

What do you mean?

What do you reckon?

What do you say, Nicholas?

What do you think he wants?

What happened, Danny?

What he said.

What he told Leslie Tiller that very afternoon.

What made you wanna be a policeman officer?

What say we drink to their demise?

What shop were you thinking of?

What the fuck is he on about?

What was the second most painful?

What you gonna do?

What, what about Leslie Tiller? One of your own?

What, with Martin Blower? No way!

What?

What?

What's it like being stabbed?

What's the matter, Danny? You never taken a shortcut before.

What's the situation?

When they started the Village of the Year contest,

When you not only indicated an awareness of the couple's affair

When's your birthday?

Where George Merchant secured permission

Where is it?

Where on earth did you get these?

Where'd he get that?

Whereupon we should open a single lane of traffic and ease congestion.

Which is why it's high time that such skills were put to better use.

Which one do you think I'll prefer?

Which reminds me,

Who could do something like this?

Who is it?

Whose horticultural expertise has helped put Sandford on the map.

Why has he got that big coat on?

Why were you there?

Why would I kill Leslie? You clearly aren't aware that we're related.

Why?

With respect, sir,

Wondered if you wouldn't mind representing us at the am drams tonight.

Would you like a card with this?

Yarp.

Yarp.

Yarp.

Yarp.

Yeah, 'cause we all sell apples round here, don't we?

Yeah, accidents happen all the time. What makes you think it was murder?

Yeah, he's Auntie Jackie's sister's brother's boy.

Yeah, or put a call into Aaron A. Aaronson, shall we?

Yeah, seeing as how you're such a big fan of murder.

Yeah, the way we see it, it's all for the greater good.

Yeah, we can't accept gifts from someone we've officially rebuked so...

Yeah, well, don't worry. There's plenty of ice cream at the station.

Yeah, well, maybe it still is.

Yeah, well, the thing is, sir.

Yeah, you do your job and we'll do ours, eh?

Yeah, you wanna be a big cop in a small town, fuck off up the model village.

Yeah! Hey, come on, it might be fun.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Haven't you got a church fete to look after?

Yeah. I think you're right.

Yeah. I've been tending my Peace Lily for about three years now.

Yeah. If you didn't see anything suspicious, then who did?

Yeah. Maybe we should go on the bouncy castle.

Yeah. They're lovely.

Yes, but you were already married to the force, weren't you?

Yes, I know!

Yes, Mr. Staker. We'll do everything we can. Can you describe it to me?

Yes, sir, what can I get you?

Yes, sir.

Yes, sir.

Yes, sirs, what can I get you?

Yes, thank you.

Yes, we were just discussing the accident.

Yes, well, guilty people often make the first move.

Yes, you did. You said,

Yes, you were, Mr. Blower.

Yes! Sir.

Yes.

Yes.

You ain't seen Bad Boys II?

You and your interfering little friend.

You are all gonna have to come with me.

You are pulling my leg?

You brutally murdered her with her own shears.

You can speak to the Inspector, but I can promise you

You can throw us in prison and go back to being blind, submissive slaves.

You can't be the Sheriff of London.

You cheeky fucker!

You deal with the store. I'll deal with the trolley boy.

You do know there are more guns in the country than there are in the city?

You do realize that window was broken from the inside?

You don't have to be a detective to work that out!

You don't have to say anything at all.

You don't know how to switch off!

You don't mind a bit of manpower do you, Doris?

You even spoke of "bashing her head in."

You ever fired a gun whilst in a high speed pursuit?

You ever fired one gun whilst jumping through the air?

You have to look closer, all right? What about this guy?

You incompetent flatfoots!

You killed the competition in cold blood.

You know how it is. News travels fast.

You know that's the bloke we done for speeding earlier.

You know the situation. We've been over this.

You know what you are?

You know, maybe he's... Maybe he's not alone. Maybe there are others.

You little fucker!

You may not be a man of God, but surely you're a man of peace.

You might as well go back and just enjoy the rest of your birthday.

You might as well go back and just enjoy the rest of your birthday.

You mothers.

You murdered him for that?

You really want to process all this lot?

You said I could be an amazing policeman officer.

You see, as much as I enjoyed your wild theories, Sergeant,

You see, the land Merchant was buying had little value in of itself but,

You should be ashamed.

You think this is sufficient reason to travel at 48 in a 30 zone?

You think this is sufficient reason to travel at 48 in a 30 zone?

You two.

You used a vehicle removal truck to stage the Blower D****r death

You want me to bother the Chief Inspector with this?

You want me to get the Chief Inspector to come all the way down here?

You were already suspicious that George Merchant was buying up

You will be popular with the local birds.

You will try and spell his name correctly this time, won't you, Timothy?

You'd understand that it's not all about gun fights and car chases.

You'll continue to be exceptional and we can't have that.

You'll find that we run a very tight ship here.

You'll find that we run a very tight ship here.

You'll put us all out of a job.

You're not seriously gonna believe this man, are you?

You're off the fucking chain!

You're playing the male lead in a homage to William Shakespeare's

You're saying this wasn't an accident?

You've been brainwashed, Tony.

You've come from a city where there's danger round every corner,

You've just gotta learn to switch off that big old melon of yours.

Your arrest record is 400% higher than any other officer.

Your predecessor assumed that rural policing was easy.

11:00, 12:00, 1:00, 2:00.

...decaffeinated? Decaffeinated?

'Cause you did it with a plant? No, no, no.

"Preposterous." Look, just stop writing!

Accident? Just an accident.

Affirmatron. Leading light of the local drama society.

And Eve D****r? Yes!

And George Merchant? Yes!

And how are things at home? I'm sorry, sir?

And Martin Blower? No, actually.

and sending them on their way. There are skeletons back there!

And there's your change. God bless you.

And what is this? Sea mine.

And yet the accident rate, it's so high? No. Yeah. What?

And, and George Merchant? He had an awful house.

Another cranberry juice? I'm fine, thank you.

Any officers near the church? Go ahead, Doris.

Apparently, they can break a man's arm. Or blow up a man's house.

Are you causing trouble? Yes, they are.

Are you going somewhere, Miss Tiller? Yes. I'm moving away.

Are you? Yes.

Bad actor. Undoubtedly.

Bad Boys II? No.

Bad driver. Not necessarily.

Blower's leading lady. Distinctive laugh. True.

Calling yourself a community that cares. Oh, but we do care, Nicholas.

Can I remain here as a PC? No.

Chief Inspector... Keep your seat.

Child vomit. Aisle six. Mop it up. Yarp.

Dad says he's got a child's mind. Okay.

Danny, let's rock. Angel!

Danny, let's roll. What you thinking?

Danny, step away from the Sergeant. No, Dad.

Danny, why didn't you say something? We were working, weren't we?

Did you cook any fools? Excuse me?

Did you find anything? Yeah.

Did you really get me that plant? Yes, I did.

Did you say, "Cool off"? No, I didn't say anything, actually.

Do I have any choice in this? No.

Don't get me wrong. I think it's amazing. Really?

Don't go in on your own. Don't worry, he knows what he's doing.

Dr. Hatcher, no! Shut up, Danny.

Eve's nice, ain't she? She certainly has a distinctive laugh.

Ever been in a high speed pursuit? Yes, I have.

Excuse me? Martin and Eve. Such a tragedy.

Excuse me? Oh, I'm sorry.

Excuse me. What?

Favored older men. Fingered.

For the breakfast. Oh, sorry.

Found them. He found them!

Fuck off! Thank you, Danny.

Fuck's sake, Nick, this is gonna take ages. Yeah, it's gonna take all night.

Give the little blonde kid your hat. I'd rather not.

Good. Do you like ice cream?

Have you been stabbed, Sergeant Fisher? No.

Have you ever seen Point Break? No.

He listed her age as 55. When, actually, I'm 53.

He's a doctor, he can deal with it. I never shot anyone before.

He's fuck ugly. Or he doesn't want you to see his face.

He's gone. Oh, my God. Who's gone?

He's not Judge Judy and executioner. He is!

Head them off? Fuck, yeah.

Hell of a day, huh? Yeah.

Hello, Nicholas. Hello, Sergeant.

Hello, Nicholas. How's the hand? It's still a bit stiff.

Hello, Nicholas. How's the hand? Still a bit stiff.

Hey, now, I need to speak to him. He'll be no use till the morning.

Hi, Danny. All right, Pete?

How's Lurch? He's in the freezer.

How's the hand? Still a bit stiff.

I am not. Nonsense.

I do use mine. Show me.

I don't drink coffee. Tea?

I don't really know what to say. Yes?

I don't really wanna get drunk. You can get a little drunk.

I just wanna be good at what I do. You are good at what you do.

I mean, do you want a lift? No, no, I could do with a walk.

I see you've already met my boy. Yes.

I wanna do what you do. You do, do what I do.

I'll drive. Shotgun! Punch that shit!

I'll have a pint of lager, please. Yeah, Roy.

I'm all right! "Little" being the operative word.

I'm gonna bust this thing wide open. Nicholas, wait.

I'm Roy Porter. This is my wife Mary. Mary.

I'm... I'm not that drunk, sir. Not you. Him.

I've had my top off in this lay by. Tits.

In 20 years or so, yes. Well done, you.

In where, sorry? In Sandford, Gloucestershire.

Is it Bob? No.

Is there a problem, Officer? Yes, there is, Mr. Porter.

Is this for someone special? Yes. Yes, it is.

It's a Japanese Peace Lily. You just can't switch off, Nicholas.

It's all you care about. That's not true.

It's more than one killer. It was Skinner a minute ago.

It's not live. It looks live.

Jesus Christ! Oh, my eye!

Kind of orange and black bill. Anything else?

Leave it with us. Righto.

Let's cut through here. Head him off. Through the gardens?

Listen, mate, I... Her dad's funeral.

Listen, you pair of... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Nicholas.

Long slender neck. Yeah.

More specifically? Department of Planning and Development.

Morning, Angle. Good morning, Angle.

Morning, Angle. Morning, Angle.

Morning, Constable. All right?

Morning, Sergeant. Morning.

Mr. Skinner, is there a problem? No, no, no, no.

Mr. Skinner... Is everything all right?

Mr. Treacher? Yeah.

Nice one, Doris. Nothing like a bit of girl on girl.

No luck catching them killers, then? It's just the one killer, actually.

No luck catching them swans then? It's just the one swan, actually.

No, it isn't. No, it isn't.

Officers, arrest these men! Wait, wait!

Oh, did you now? Yeah.

Oh, I see. It's "fascism." Fascism. Wonderful.

Oh, that's Lurch. Go on.

Oh, when did you start? Tomorrow.

Okay, I'll have one. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

Pack it in, Frank, you silly bastard! Now, now.

PC Thatcher? Yes, love?

Pint of lager, please, Mary. Right you are, my love.

Prick. Wanker.

Really? 'Course he fucking was!

Right. Then where are you living? He's staying at the Section House, sir.

Said he had big plans for Sandford. Pissed on the floor in The Crown.

Same again tomorrow? Yeah.

Secure the area. What?

See what I did there? You hypnotized him.

Sergeant Angel, hi hi. Mr. Messenger.

Sergeant Angel. Morning. The swan's escaped.

Sergeant Fisher? What?

Shame. How so?

She's ever so good. Oh, go on.

She's our only policewoman. She's not a policewoman.

Simon Skinner, I believe you've met. Oh, we're already firm friends.

Sir, you have to understand... No, you have to understand.

Sir? Sergeant Popwell.

Skid marks. Now who's being childish?

Someone from London called for you. Tell them I'll call them back.

specifically put in place to save lives. Just, look, this is preposterous.

Stealing biscuits is wrong? Correct.

sunk into that thick skull of yours? Yeah.

Tell him I was right. What are you gonna do?

Terrible speller. Oh, yeah?

Thank you, Danny. I can't believe I shot someone.

That's in the country. Yes, lovely.

That's just extraordinary. You should see the one on the other side.

That's not true. It is!

That's us. Why is this such a big joke to you?

The castle. Oh, yeah? And who might you be?

The greater good? The greater good. Precisely.

The greater good. Shut it!

The inebriate in cell four. I don't know. Nobody tells me nothing.

The swan's escaped? Yeah.

The victims knew each other. Everyone knows everyone round here.

There was something took my eye. Really? What's that?

There's been reports of a fire in the station. What?

They listed her age as 55. When I'm actually 53.

They're both called Andrew? They said you were good.

They're happy, contented. They're living in a dream world.

Think of your mother. Mum is dead, Dad.

This is a rifle range. You'll be really good at it.

This is murder! It's not, it's ketchup.

This is not funny, Detective! Oh, give over, Miss Marples.

This is ridiculous. No, it's not, Dad. It's very unridiculous.

Tom? Thanks, Joyce.

Tom. Thanks, Joyce.

Want anything from the shop? You've just been to the shop.

Wave your hitting stick about. No.

we are gonna be up to our balls in jugglers. We'll get right onto it, Tom.

We should get down there. How?

We're making you Sergeant. I see.

Well, he murdered Bill Shakespeare. What?

Well, how's our guest? Guest?

Well, I... To flout speed limits

Well, just between you and I... Yes?

Well, there's nothing going on, is there? There is always something going on.

What about Dad? He'll come round again.

What about Lethal Weapon? No.

What are you thinking? Foul play? Maybe.

What are you two up to? Nothing.

What are you up to tonight? I have to water my Peace Lily.

What did he say? He said, "An 'edge is an 'edge.

What did you think was happening? Not this!

What do you mean? Well, there's nothing going on, is there?

What exactly did you have in mind? I don't know. Pub?

What exactly were you thinking? Don't know. Pub?

What happened, Danny? Car accident.

What happened, Danny? Traffic collision.

What others? The others the NWA have murdered.

What year? Every year.

What you thinking? Well...

What's that, sir? A great big bushy beard.

What's the matter? You got brain freeze? No, I got brainwave.

What's the situation? Two blokes and a fuckload of cutlery.

What's your name? Aaron A. Aaronson.

When did you move in? About five years ago.

When's your birthday? Eighth of May, 1969.

When's your birthday? Twenty second of February.

Who could do something like this? Maybe it was the swan.

Who else? Farmers's mums.

Who? The mum and the sister.

Why are you dressed like a police officer? Because I am one.

Why do we need the dog? It's not the dog we need.

Why have you got your stab vest on? It's a requirement.

Why on earth would I do that, Sergeant? I'm glad you asked.

With the recruits? Yes, he's living out of cardboard boxes.

Worked at? Council.

Yeah, she is. I've seen her bra. She's a police officer.

Yeah, Sissy Skinner. What a Gaylord.

Yeah, well, I've been kind of busy. We need you back.

Yeah? Yeah.

Yes, I do. Okay.

Yes, sir, of course. And there's a spare for Danny, too.

Yes, sir? That's it.

You are talking about here? Nicholas, what do you want?

You can't just make people disappear. Yes, I can. I'm the Chief Inspector.

You did good, kid. Ta.

You don't switch off, do you? You sound like my ex.

You got a mustache. I know.

You in for the night? Go on, four's free.

You know George Merchant, don't you? Evening, Officer.

You know that fella who blew up? George Merchant.

You know that fella who blew up? George Merchant.

You might need this. Thanks, partner.

You must be Sergeant Angel. Yes, I am.

You want anything from the shop? Cornetto.

You want to take this higher? Yes, yes, I do.

You what? No, apparently it's been deactivated. Over.

You're 37? Yeah.

You're a doctor, deal with it. Yeah, motherfucker.

You're a what? A slasher of prices.

You're an agnostic? I think I have a cream for that.

You're seeing someone else. Yes. How did you...

You've gotta help me take him down. I can't.

You've seen Die Hard, though? No.

Your dad sells apples, Andy. And raspberries.

Yours, isn't it? I won it for you.

'cause "manpower's" a bit sexist.

'cause he loves him so much,

'Cause we sat through three hours of so called acting last night,

"Anything you do say can be given in evidence."

"Drive safe. " Oh, my God.

"Evil old woman considered frightful or ugly. " It's 12 down.

"For never was there a story of more woe. Than this of Juliet and her Romeo."

"He only chopped it down 'cause it spoilt his view.

"I'd love to settle down in the country sometime, Janine."

"if you fail to mention when questioned something you later rely on in court.

"Local Bobby Gives Thumbs Up To Teen Suicide"?

"Meet the cop that can't be stopped."

"Nicholas Angel."

"Stop writing."

"System of Government characterized by extreme dictatorship. " Seven across.

"What's Reaper moaning about?"

"Yes, I suppose."