Gigantic Edit

A cab?

A car.

A Chinese baby for that matter.

A couple of years... could be earlier.

A kid from China.

A little pressure.

A little...

A meditation cushion.

A new child, a new life, a new family...

A pheasant with a death wish?

A pinata of a famous dictator,

A salesman with a shiner. I'm gonna believe him.

A toast, Brian?

A warranty package built into the price,

About the size of a squash ball, maybe bigger.

Absolutely. You wanna use the...

Advertising executives in front of a bunch of kids.

After cab.

After they've made it as far as we've made it...

Again with meditation.

Alright,

Alright, beautiful.

Alright, get up.

Alright, if you feel like you must.

Alright, let's have a little look at the little Samurai.

Alright, see you there. Bye...

Alright.

Alright.

Am I a virgin...

Am I incorrect? Please tell me if I'm being incorrect.

American? It's a lot of money for a goddamn bed.

And a free salt salad...

And Brian...

And don't fucking lie to me either.

And have them cook us a proper meal.

And he's got a brother who plays canasta

And here, and initial here.

And here's to many many happy birthdays to come

And how's the adoption going? Brian's in the middle of adopting

And I left my phone in my purse and...

And I sort of love him.

And I will come with you so it won't get too weird.

And I'll be at every one of them! Salud!

And I'll make you soup.

And I'll...

And I'm not well versed in that detail.

And I've seen you since you were a little...

And if you can aspire...

And it costs $249.

And love... love love love.

And M. Weathersby...

And never had a boyfriend.

And see If I look like a massive wall of Grey.

And she wants a horsie or he wants a Countach.

And taking a little break?

And talked to someone about a bed.

And tediousness its limbs and outward flourishes.

And tell him I need to talk to him?

And then you'll be returning here to New York with the baby.

And then...

And they didn't update the website...

And this is...

And we're just doing what we do.

And what does less light mean?

And what you kids do all day. Playing those Tetris games pretending to work.

And why more today than yesterday.

And you get the kid, what's the long term finance structure?

And you need to get healthy.

And you're good.

And you've got 15 years on both of ya.

And, we have an international sister agency,

And?

And... for delivery...

Another bottle of Merlot please.

Antidepressants.

Any news from China?

Anytime...

Anyway...

Anyways I was with him and I...

Anyways, can I just ask you this thing?

Are done in a matter of minutes, even seconds.

Are liars, thieves, and a categorical waste of time and resources.

Are you adopting a dog?

Are you alright?

Are you gonna raise this kid?

Are you having a party?

Are you not planning on sticking around, or is it an ammunition issue?

Are you open at night?

Are you trying to free these things?

As I suspected gents he didn't go for the black market idea.

Asian studies.

Asshole.

Attagirl. Straight.

Attributed to middle aged men today. I'm not going down that road.

Back disorders, duodenal ulcers, the most misdiagnosed conditions

Bang it home?

Bang it home.

Be nice to have some new life in this family.

Be right back.

Be safe.

Because frankly, Barbara don't get your nose outta the joint,

Because your diploma

Been my pleasure. And don't forget to come back soon.

Behind some **** named Nasser.

Being thrown into the snakepit?

Believe it or not, I understand how commission works.

Best bed on the market.

Bet you wish you had a some of these out there. Get all your buddies together.

Better be for that kinda money.

Black dude? White dude?

Black hair ain't easy to deal with you know.

Black trumpets south side of Temper lower elevations than last year.

Blazed through 5 in 5 years.

Bobby...

Body's tighted.

Bonjour mes amis.

Boyfriend?

Brian sold my father a mattress.

Brian, am I correct?

Brian, by the way.

Brian, I wanted to talk to you a little bit more.

Brian, let's go celebrate.

Brian, there's a deuce loose in the caboose

Brian, this is Ducky Settinstall. Ducky, meet Brian.

Brian, Tu viens me Donner un coup de main.

Brian, you heard it. OK.

Brian?

Bring it back here.

Bunch of homos on Fire Island piling on top of each other. It's disgusting.

But can you keep me on the email list and for alternative list as well?

But congratulations!

But he never had the family the other kids did.

But I admire it.

But I'll call you later and...

But I've got work to do here.

But it seems Mr. 7 is always a little bit of a quitter.

But nothing's normal.

But now, I'm gonna...

But that's the extent of my Asian language.

But then Melanie was kinda like in my ear the whole day

But whatever you need, I'll support you.

But you're OK now.

But...

But...

But...

Bye Larry.

Bye.

Bye.

C'mon, not gonna touch you.

Call her.

Came in looking for some beds for his new mansion.

Can I get either of you somethin' to drink?

Can I lie here for awhile?

Can we have sex over there?

Can you come?

Can you hold on one second?

Can you please connect me to Kenyatta Folds this is Brian Weathersby.

Can you see up my skirt?

Can...

Can't exercise her own honor, I'm sure she would want you to be

Can't remember the exact number. It's a lot more.

Can't.

Cause I just remembered I have a doctor's appointment.

Champagne,

Charged a fortune but I've got his number.

Check them golden oysters!

Christ to a cracker!

Chrome mongoose.

City's laid out in a perfect grid, I can see how that can happen, 62nd street...

Cocktails,

Collectively we can't make buttered toast.

Colonel Muammar Al Gaddafi.

Combination **** whistle, pepper spray mini brass knuckle key chain.

Come down and see you.

Come on everyone. We must drink up,

Come on, I'll show you.

Come on. I'm starving.

Come over here.

Come up and see me.

Commit myself fully to this?

Congratulations big guy.

Congratulations! I'm super psyched for you.

Crock. It's not.

Dad, I can't.

Dad, just ring the buzzer and I'll buzz you up.

Dad, you need some help?

Dad.

Dad. They don't do that.

Dad...

Damn.

Definitely white.

Delivery, when do you want it?

Depression, sleep deprivation, test, the usual.

Did he hurt you?

Did you eat from a deli?

Did you know I had brain cancer once?

Did you pick that?

Diligent about this and he's a rare case.

Do as you will.

Do I have to get dressed up?

Do you ever incorporate things into your dreams?

Do you have any interest in having sex with me?

Do you know women are 20 times more likely to be depressed than men?

Do you play squash, Brian?

Do you wanna come upstairs?

Do you want me to go ask the security guard?

Do you want me to hold on to them?

Does he usually?

Does it? Or does it sound awesome?!

Don't be sorry.

Don't give the phone company all of our money.

Don't have to be shy in front of me, I know how you spend your weekends.

Don't lose it, I got it in Corsica.

Don't.

Douchebag, Nagata.

Douchebag.

Down.

Drinks...

Drop by her place.

Ducky.

Effectively combines three of my great fears.

Enough, enough...

Every year banks give out bonuses, big bonuses a couple of mil.

Everyone thought that we were his grandparents.

Evidemment, I get carried away sometimes.

Excuse me, shaman.

Expound.

Family Initiative.

Fantastic.

Fill it with bitter honey.

First, I wanna tell you that...

For acting out and I'm sorry for being so weird and I wanted to tell you...

For his 8th birthday, I got him a bike.

For men.

For that guy with the fag friend.

For the kids when they were born I would make...

For your benefit, I want you to know that...

Freaking car...

Fuck it, money gotta spin man.

Fuck you, round eyed drouchebag.

Fuck!

Fucking guy's 28.

Get him home.

Get that kid to do it.

God bless capitalism.

Goddamn, if you don't try to squeeze an "R" in every word.

Good bye. You're crazy.

Good enough quack.

Good for you.

Good guess. It's nice to meet you Happy.

Good job.

Good luck.

Good one. Try it out, Gary.

Good.

Good.

Good... I'll take that bait.

Goodnight Brian.

Got it.

Gotta love this fucking bed. You got laid recently didn't you?

Great job.

Great.

Great.

Great.

Great.

Great. Nothing for me, thanks.

Great. What does he do?

Gynaecologist?

Had a white stepfather had to deal with my sister's Afro coiffures.

Had Pol Pot.

Happy!

Happy?

Happy?

Harriet?

Harriet.

Harriet.

Has to do with musculature and ligaments.

Have a disgusting orgy.

Have a great time.

Have a seat on the couch, make yourself comfortable.

Hawaiian broad.

He brings a gun.

He buy that bed?

He cackled, squealed like a pig.

He came in here with another guy.

He did?

He did?

He doesn't ride in cabs.

He doesn't use the gun.

He is.

He laid there for a couple of minutes.

He might be able to help you.

He owns an airline company, tobacco interests...

He ran to his room crying, said he wanted a baby,

He thinks he can get a Chinese baby on the black market for like 45000 $.

He throws up.

He told his teacher once that...

He told me he loved me.

He was an old perv.

He was confused I guess.

He was just trying to

He'll pay you

He's a marvelous Korean!!

He's asleep?

He's been sweet his whole life.

He's been talkin' bout it his whole life.

He's got 5 bedrooms.

He's got these kind of connections. He's an oil man.

He's living in squalor.

He's started sleeping with my daughter.

Heights,

Hell yeah.

Hell, no.

Hello?

Hello...

Here here, gimme that baby. Come on...

Here I am with you fish face perverts.

Here we are, walking together in the woods.

Here you go.

Here's what you do.

Hey Brian.

Hey dad, this is Octavio, he was just getting going.

Hey Kevin, lunch.

Hey look, got some mini burgers a whole bunch if you want some.

Hey you...

Hey, Kennyata, it's Brian Weathersby.

Hi Brian, nice to meet you.

Hi, I'm Brian.

Hi.

His daughter.

His real parents had died in a car crash and his grandparents took him on.

Hold on.

Hold this for one sec cause I just...

Holy shit!

Honey, you probably got a microbial virus or some...

Hope you get the kid.

How about the bedroom area?

How about Thursday the 23rd?

How are you dear?

How are you doing?

How are you?

How come you've never had a wife? Never a family.

How did you make out with the Wall Street guy?

How do you guys know each other?

How do you shut this off?

How do you support a kid on a meager salary?

How long was I asleep?

How much do you make in the job?

How old are you going to be?

How old was he when he had you?

How was the doctor, dad?

How was your dinner?

How's the mattress business?

How's your soup?

Huge tumour on the recesses in my temporal lobe.

I actually just called to ask you something.

I admire the hell out of it.

I am shit.

I am...

I appreciate the effort though.

I asked him how his bonus season went.

I asked him some questions about his job,

I assume you make peanuts at the mattress factory.

I barely have a job, so do you wanna see this?

I bet you wish you could come.

I called my mother the other day.

I came here to buy a bed and I don't have time to chase you down

I can't drive in New York City.

I care for you.

I could come with you, this place is dead.

I could put them in an envelope for you or somethin'?

I didn't just fall off the turnip truck, son.

I do.

I do.

I don't blame him.

I don't drink beer.

I don't have a real job

I don't have all day for speeches I want a bed.

I don't have the baby yet.

I don't know what you could possibly ask me.

I don't know.

I don't know. Depends on how serious this little meeting we're having is.

I feel like shit.

I fell asleep on your bed.

I generally sell 5 beds a month, and I get 5%

I got a leg cramp.

I got a problem.

I got him up on that Scona, made him take off his shoes, got him a cup of tea.

I got it in France when I was 18.

I got no news man, they met on Wednesday but...

I got really nervous and I...

I got the baby.

I gotta go.

I gotta jack.

I guess I had to know one way or the other.

I guess I'll waive the fee because I told your dad or...

I guess we'll just eat less food.

I guess...

I had sex with this girl

I had this fucked up dream...

I have the 9th fastest serve in the world.

I haven't been in an office in 20 years.

I haven't the foggiest idea, to be truthful...

I hope it happens.

I just have so much I wanna tell you.

I just signed up online.

I just wanna say, congratu fuckin lations man, you did it.

I just went to the bathroom and I threw up everywhere.

I just wondered if...

I know, it's crazy.

I know.

I know.

I like it.

I look like a mannequin in this thing.

I looked them up, that shit's expensive.

I made the list.

I mapped the pathology of the cancer with my mind.

I meant the baby.

I meant your dad?

I need to schedule another appointment.

I need you to drive me.

I owe you all for the due diligence. This round's on me.

I pushed it down to the fatty tissue of my temporal lobe...

I really appreciate you doing this, taking time off from work and all.

I really do.

I really need your support right now.

I really wanna hear this, can you just

I really wanted to come to the dinner.

I see.

I should check with work, though.

I should get there.

I signed up for a cooking school on the internet...

I speak a little Mandarin, pretty fluent Thai

I speak French so... I guess...

I still get these alumni newsletters from Graaten.

I think I sold him 5 beds.

I think I'll have the clams.

I think I'll have the lamb...

I think I'm gonna walk with Brian.

I think our work here is done.

I think so too.

I think we both know that's not the case.

I think you understand me...

I think you'd be great at it.

I think you've done the right thing.

I thought I'd come by and get the power converter.

I thought it says Naples, Florida, 809?

I thought so.

I thought you had to go to China.

I thought you were going off to become a chef.

I thought you'd already gone.

I understand.

I was at work and...

I was attacked by a homeless man.

I was close once.

I was finishing my residency when I was his age.

I was half a geezer, when I had that boy.

I was in a cave and my hair was made out of marijuana and then...

I was in the neighborhood.

I was out of it.

I was talking to the big guy, Kanagae...

I was the no 2 at Yale.

I will.

I will.

I work for my sister.

I work with ****, they Jew me all day long so I can say it.

I would love to.

I.e. being dumped into a pool...

I'd love to help.

I'll give you $1000.

I'll give you whatever you need.

I'll go along with it but I'm not fucking stressed.

I'll have some.

I'll just come in tomorrow and...

I'll leave you two lovebirds alone.

I'll pay for everything.

I'll probably have you come in and take care of some financial stuffs,

I'll see you tomorrow. Tell your papa I said Happy 80th.

I'll send my girl by this afternoon take a look, work out the financing.

I'll take a bourbon.

I'll talk to you tomorrow?

I'll tell you that.

I'm a little cramped.

I'm asking the tough questions. Go!

I'm going to be 29.

I'm going to China,

I'm going to cooking school.

I'm going to the back doctor today.

I'm gonna figure this thing out.

I'm gonna get you a receipt,

I'm gonna go to chef school. Next week, in France.

I'm gonna go.

I'm gonna help Jacques

I'm happy to help, I'll be right over here.

I'm Happy.

I'm having dinner with my dad if you wanna come?

I'm here to see Harriet Lolly?

I'm hungover.

I'm hungry, I'm gonna grab something to eat. Brian you want something?

I'm in the wrong industry.

I'm just afraid that I fucked everything up beyond repair.

I'm just here with some of my lady friends and we're just...

I'm just so fucked up.

I'm late for work.

I'm lying on the kitchen floor.

I'm not an ideal candidate.

I'm not saying that doesn't make sense, I don't know what "smackdown" is.

I'm not... I'm not ill.

I'm okay.

I'm seeing this guy and he's about to...

I'm so happy for you, Brian.

I'm so sorry I just run over there are all these things I have to do.

I'm sorry about dinner.

I'm sorry again.

I'm sorry, but chef school...

I'm sorry, can you repeat the name?

I'm sorry, homosexual.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sure she got tied up with something important.

I'm totally serious when I say she may have gotten lost leaving the apartment.

I'm trying to quantify how helpless this one feels

I'm with my Japanese guys doing business. Does my breath stink?

I've an international power converter thing in my apartment if you need it.

I've been waiting...

I've got your receipt here and all the paperwork for the bed,

I've kinda a weird question for you.

I've never seen you do anything but pour cereal.

I've played some squash.

I've played, not much.

If she had any idea how many times a day I masturbated thinking about her.

In France.

In the back of her father' station wagon the other day.

In the nude, I presume?

In the process of adopting a baby from China.

Interviews and there are a few categories where

Is it a sting when you pee kinda problem?

Is it because she works for you? You think it might be a conflict of interest

Is it?

Is Paul the new...

Is that a lie?

Is that purple vodka?

Is that right?

Is there a bathroom I could use really quickly?

Is there someone here?

Is this a rueful act or a mistake?

Is this the one he wants?

Is your artwork?

It doesn't exist because it dissolved in 2004

It makes sense.

It sounds kinda shady.

It sounds totally preposterous somebody your age adopting a baby.

It takes mushrooms...

It was nice to meet you.

It was...

It wasn't disloyal, he was...

It'll be some cost cutting measures like that, less food,

It's a commission based thing so, the more I sell the more I make.

It's a cushion?

It's a Lamborghini.

It's a nice name.

It's a pretty standard 25 year non prorated deal.

It's a shit covered bed that's what it is.

It's a swift change.

It's an article about a Tibetan who plays basketball

It's been too long, dear.

It's called the Bobcat...

It's damn good too.

It's disappointing.

It's for my...

It's hard to say... I mean nobody knows to what degree the rat feels helpless.

It's Harriet.

It's just a figure of speech, I'm half Jew myself

It's just a lot.

It's just been the one time in your car,

It's just the way I see it.

It's kinda Frenchy.

It's mostly just a pillow that...

It's nice.

It's nothing really.

It's OK to not be married.

It's okay dear.

It's okay.

It's on 62nd Street,

It's only 9:30.

It's right over there.

It's the delivery.

It's too much.

It's tough.

It's your life.

It's...

Jacques, can we speak in English?

Jacques, you fabulous Frenchman!

Jailbreak?

James had Mussolini.

John and James, will be the baby's secondary guardians, is that right?

John Weathersby.

John, had Stalin.

Jonathan?

June 9th.

Just kind of...

Just make sure she's alright.

Just sort of a general question, mom.

Just stay here then.

Just why, if you don't mind us asking.

Just... their brains.

Kenny, would you care to join us?

Kenyatta called.

Kenyatta Folds, please.

Kind of.

Kinda.

Kirby, please.

Knock yourself out.

Knocked out cold.

Larry.

Laters.

Let me get that thing.

Let me show you something.

Let's do this.

Let's get down to some specifics.

Let's go Gary, this place depresses me.

Let's go girls. Come on up...

Let's go up here.

Let's whack him.

Ligamenty.

Like what?

Like what?

Like, just stuffs for the show and some other things.

Like... like your friend.

Listen dudes, I need someone to help me with that Scona delivery.

Listen, my friend Jin Ho,

Listen...

Listen...

Lobsters, lobsters, lobsters...

Look at those beauties.

Look where it got you, getting hand pumped on a Tuesday night.

Looks like a 22.

Looks like a stump.

Looks like a tiny calibre bullet.

Looks like it turned out well for everybody.

Looks like you'll be headed over to Hong Kong, 2 months.

Made in Sweden.

Make everything seem normal, I suppose.

Marvelous! That's fantastic, because we need someone in this family

May I sit on it?

May...

Maybe I should leave.

Maybe more.

Maybe.

Me too.

Me too.

Me, I sleep like the dead anyway but I cannot touch the Swedes.

Me, I'm just having some dinner, drinking some vodka.

Me, my name's Harriet, but everybody calls me Happy.

Merci monsieur, I don't kiss like that.

Mercy, Lord, that's tragic.

Might be some pheasant.

Mom?

Mostly just ads.

Motherfucker!

My dad... he came in here earlier

My family's having a dinner to celebrate tomorrow night.

My father's 80th birthday.

My folks are coming by and my brothers are coming too.

My hand is starting to look a bit like an eagle's claw.

My little contribution, but...

My plane is supposed to leave tomorrow, but...

My swim coach

Name is next to the button, dad.

Near grand'ma.

Never met anyone like you.

Never really been in love.

Nice to meet ya.

No chemo, no radiation.

No disrespect.

No go. I'll call it off.

No heat, et cetera...

No mom, I didn't eat from a deli.

No porter? What do you mean? You mean no one?

No problem.

No way.

No wife, no nothing.

No, absolutely not.

No, but I like it.

No, don't be.

No, I'm alright.

No, it's OK, it's a little weird.

No, no, I've kept him long enough.

No, you're on this ride with me and the poofter here.

No!

No.

No.

No. I just don't drink 3 bottles of wine on my own.

No...

No... you called me. I'm calling you back.

Nobody honors that system.

Nope, I've got it.

Not on my account at all?

Not really.

Not really.

Not really.

Not really... when you think about it heterosexually.

Not serious.

Not this late at night you're not. Get in the car.

Not today dude. Religion.

Nothing, it's Friday, so I thought I'd call.

Nothing. He likes cars and he owns a few ponies.

Nothing...

Nothing's beyond repair.

Nothing's changed.

Now pipe down.

Now that we both know what we're doing, what's next?

Now what?

Now, Happy...

Now?

Obviously you'll be the baby's primary sponsor, Brian.

Of course.

Of no help to you.

Of the pre tax sales.

Oh God, good to hear your voice.

Oh hey, wassup man?

Oh my God!

Oh no... best to let it steep a while.

Oh yeah, kind of sort of uh loud mouth.

Oh, I'm sorry... Hello.

OK, great. Just sign here

OK, I'm still interested in the main adoption list

OK. You know, it's...

On the one hand,

One for me.

One for you.

One for you.

One piping hot goat stew.

Or really he told me.

Or we can do it here.

Or we can make our way back.

Or you never see her for the rest of your life.

Oui c'est ça, c'est ça.

Over here.

Oysters.

****stani.

Parallel paths...

Parts and he's like honking his guts out.

Paul's car show.

Pickup game, caught an elbow.

Please go to the monitor and check

Please?

Prepare your pouches for the poisoning.

Press the button.

Pretty much my whole life.

Probably not.