Wrong Turn 6: Last Resort Edit

A little self control, boys! That's all I ask!

A one shot kill.

A place this old surely has a book in it.

Actually, we're kissing cousins on our Quaker brother's sister's side.

Afraid this is all we have right now.

Agnes Fields, you hear of her?

Agnes Fields.

Ah!

Ah!

Ah! (GRUNTS)

Ah! What the fuck?!

Ahh!

Aim for the upper shoulder.

Ain't no doubt all of this is a little bit weird.

Ain't nothing we haven't heard before. Just let it roll off my back nowadays.

All right, it's OK. I can do it.

All right. I'll bring them to you, and you catalogue them. OK?

All you boys react that way.

ALL: Whoa!

And being smarter than the animal.

And don't look back.

And fun is just the kind of therapy we all need.

And got 4,000 hits in one day.

And I can already feel that baby coming deep inside.

And it beats inside every one of us.

And it has! Even Sally noticed the difference

And our blood,

And that ritual preserved our blood lines, it cleansed it even.

And that's why my brother and those guys are right behind us.

And that's why they paid us the big bucks.

And they bring temptation to stray.

And tor those that don't watch Antique Roadshow...

And we go back, we'll send someone in for a real appraisal.

And with your mind, your schooling, your strength,

And you don't belong here. So just go before you get hurt!

And you messed with the little bitty real nice.

And your old camera posted my naked ass all over the internet last trip!

Anything on this land belongs to us.

Anything that they've told you?

Are we all here?

Are we going down there?

As I said, we weren't expecting so many.

Aw...

Bait your area.

Be still.

Because it looks like you rolled around in blood.

Beer has arrived.

Before it all... happened.

Besides, come on, it's fun.

Better leave a trail of breadcrumbs.

Better.

Boy, are they to die for.

Brother.

Bryan and Jillian, they did.

Bryan with his subprimes, and Jillian playing the Manhattan socialite bitch.

BRYAN: No, we're staying up at Hobb Springs.

BRYAN: No...

Bryan? We used to work together,

But I know this.

But I'm so close, that I can touch him.

But I've seen people live with a lot worse.

But if you've aimed just right, it'll be pure reflex.

But the only person I don't feel like I know is you!

But we had birthright.

But what we have here is classic mountain breeding.

But you gotta come alone.

By some maniac banging on the fucking door!

Cabinet's full of them. I...

Can I interest you in an herbal essence?

Can you imagine what they decided to hide?

Charlie, what did you do to this weed?

CHARLIE: Ahh!

CHARLIE: Go, go!

Check out those cupboards.

Check the front desk.

Come check this out.

Come on, boys, we've got more important work to do, huh?

Come on, Jill! Give us the old Girls Gone Wild.

Come on, they're probably just a normal couple.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on. Let's go. Let's go.

Considering you haven't even tried it once.

Couple coats of paint, and it could be...

Danny, no.

Danny, you and me.

Danny, you're used to Central Park West

DANNY: Creepy.

DANNY: Hey, guys, how are you? Find the place OK?

DANNY: It actually smells sweet.

DANNY: Looks like they took off with a few parting gifts.

DANNY: No!

DANNY: on, my God, Sally.

DANNY: Uh, no, no, it's fine. Really.

DANNY: Who are you?

DANNY: Why the hell are they all covered up?

Danny!

Danny!

Danny!

Danny! What the hell happened to you?

Danny?

Danny.

Danny... are these scratches?

Dark red, you probably hit the liver.

Definitely not my clients.

Deliver another shot.

Did you actually kill something?

Did you get all that?

Did you look at the guy? It's like night and day.

Do I make myself clear? Do you understand me?

Do you even know anything about... about running a hotel, or a spa?

Do you even know? You don't even know, Danny!

Do you guys smell that?

Do you have any idea how much these are worth?

Does it hurt? Oh!

Don't go disappearing on us now, OK? (LAUGHS)

Don't worry, baby, I'm gonna make this real quick.

Don't worry.

Don't you get that?! I think he knows what's been going on!

Don't you judge me.

Don't.

Enjoy your stay.

Enough excitement for two weeks at least.

Enough! Enough.

Even some of the women do.

Ever been bow hunting, Danny?

Every man lives by his own set of rules.

Families really tamed this land, they made it into something.

Figure we could have a grand reopening by next summer.

Finding out you actually had some family out there.

Fine.

Finish him off.

First you gotta scout, then stretch.

Flatware. Silver.

Flesh is life.

Fried outlets.

Fuck that. I'm home.

FUCK you!

Fuck you! I'd like to see you guys do Boys Gone Wild.

Fucking Alzheimer's, dude. It's a fucking killer.

Fucking asshole!

Fucking brilliant.

Fucking family.

Geez.

Geez. This is one kinky spa.

Get the idea?

Get the... Fuck!

Get Toni out of here right now!

Get up, Charlie! Go!

Give it here, give it here.

Give that.

Go now!

Go on in.

Go on, sit down.

Go on.

God forbid they ever achieve anything in life by actually working for it.

God, you're gonna get infected. You should lay down.

Good shot, Danny.

Gotta love therapy.

Guys, I've never seen him this fucked up.

H9)'

Have you guys seen Danny?

Haven't you guys felt different since you got here?

He doesn't know what you are. I do.

He knows.

He may have some kick left in him.

He stays with me.

He was just messing around. Weren't you, Vic?

He's adopted, you know that.

Hello?

Hello? We're the new owner's best friends. So you can do better.

Hello?! Oh...

Help herself, obviously.

Her and her brother/husband/cousin/whatever.

Here. Toni, stay back.

Hey, guys, if we're gonna do this, we're gonna do this in style.

Hey, guys. This place just got a whole lot better.

Hey, how are you? You enjoying our all protein buffet?

Hey, we don't have to make a decision right away. It's fine.

Hobb Springs, established 1926 by families unknown.

How are you ladies? Hi.

How best to deal with you.

How could I not know any of these people?

How did this one get in here to begin with?

How do you keep it pure?

How long have you been doing this?

How much?

How the fuck should I know?

How?

How'd you like my place now, Bryan?

Hum?

I always did the heavy lifting, and look what that cost me.

I brought her here, and she's my responsibility.

I can make you feel better than that stuck up bitch you brought.

I can't get this hot spot to work.

I can't go another winter.

I can't think what could have happened to her.

I cannot believe that you are finally here.

I could be inheriting a Motel 6.

I could tell by your eyes.

I couldn't.

I didn't think anyone would notice.

I do make it myself.

I do.

I don't even know why we're still friends with the guy!

I don't get up there much myself anymore, but I expect I will be.

I don't know how to break this to you, man,

I don't know these people or this place.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know. Maybe.

I don't know. You should know, huh? ♪ Da, da... ♪

I don't need this right now, Rod. OK?

I found this on a family camping trip when I was a kid.

I got a letter saying that I belonged to something.

I got pretty messed up, hon.

I guess that's when you find out who your real friends are.

I had a bad feeling about this.

I kinda like it.

I knew you would.

I knew you'd come around.

I know I Will.

I know it's hard to wait.

I know what you're gonna say.

I lost a lot of people's money.

I mean, I gave 'em a chance to get in on the ground floor.

I need a moment alone with my boyfriend.

I need this.

I see, no problem. We have plenty of vacancies coming up.

I should go tend to him.

I suppose this will have to do.

I think I know.

I think it's better if we show you.

I think we should put one of these in Danny's room.

I think you like me rubbing up against you.

I told you to leave!

I told you to leave.

I tried to stop 'em.

I used to be on Wall Street. Had a bit of a meltdown.

I wanna meet these people and find out what I'm all about.

I would like to keep it that way.

I'd be happy to show you around.

I'd like to thank the Academy for this prestigious award.

I'd say you're strong enough.

I'll do it.

I'll go, but you go get your boyfriend. This was all his idea.

I'll say, we almost killed you, man!

I'm a Hillicker now. You don't need her too.

I'm afraid I can't do that, Danny. She knows an awful lot.

I'm blaming Vic for that too.

I'm gonna need some more paper.

I'm gonna tell Danny everything about you.

I'm Jackson. We're the caretakers here.

I'm just happy.

I'm just saying, it's the Appalachians.

I'm just the investigative type.

I'm really sorry.

I'm so sorry, that was so rude of us.

I'm sorry, I... I don't know who you are.

I'm sorry. I'm just very proud of my heritage.

I'm still wrapping my head around that.

If it'll help, I did some digging.

Including Bryan's, Toni's, my own.

Is that the big, strong man I rang for?

Is this enough?

It belongs together.

It may take some time.

It was all so embarrassing.

It wasn't a buck.

It won't be long, and you can all have at 'em as much as you like.

It's a family formula.

It's about patience.

It's dark red blood. Besides, he'll be dead soon.

It's family.

It's gonna get dark soon, and I don't like him alone with these people.

It's impressive. Really.

It's more like a health spa, really.

It's not coming! It's too twisted!

It's not so easy for me to just pack it all in, you know.

It's not that.

It's not... where's the peroxide?

It's OK. Sh, sh...

It's pretty cool, huh?

It's the way we do things.

It's time to decide.

It's warm.

It's your kill.

Jackson brought Danny to me to tend to.

JACKSON: Come to welcome you home, Danny.

JACKSON: He may try to bolt.

JACKSON: It's a place for our folk to gather from far and wide.

JACKSON: Our families tamed this land.

JACKSON: Pink blood with air bubbles means you've hit the heart or the lung.

JACKSON: Sally!

JACKSON: Sally?

JACKSON: See, like this brew, Hobb Springs is a testament to family.

JACKSON: Someplace the deer feels safe.

JACKSON: Very good, Danny.

JACKSON: Watery blood with bile, you may have to track the deer,

JACKSON: We do have the internet out here.

JACKSON: Whatever you wish. We work for you now.

JACKSON: You don't wanna go after your prey.

Jesus, Toni.

Jesus!

Jillian, it's two weeks, OK?

JILLIAN: Tell me how it's fair that we have to pay for groceries.

JILLIAN: Yeah, but where do they lead?

Jillian?

Just a minute, guys.

Just be careful.

Just fucking leave!

Just here. I didn't wanna look alone.

Just let Sally take care of you.

Just such a small aspect of who we really are.

Just what is a lovely couple like you doing settling in Hobb Springs?

Just when I hit the lowest I've ever hit,

Just you wait until you've experienced our hot springs.

Keep that shit away from me too.

Kinky, right?

L do!

Leave Danny alone. Even if it means giving his friends a pass.

Leave him alone, Mom, he's enjoying himself.

Let's get naked. (LAUGHS)

Like Bryan and Jillian, Danny?! Hurt?! They're not hurt!

Like Vic?!

Like your friends came with you.

Like, you're carrying them around everywhere.

Long life.

Look, I don't know what to expect.

Look, it's OK. It's OK.

Lord knows I can't.

Lure, entice the deer over your ways.

Make it fucking quick!

Man, that's tight.

MAN: How are we even gonna find our way around in there?

MAN: So you had no idea?

MAN: Whoo!

Maybe it's Danny or Vic.

Maybe it's just what we needed.

Maybe we get lucky and her face will ring a bell with somebody.

Maybe your side of the family moved.

Maybe yours.

Me, Bryan. We could be talking about my history.

Mold.

Most of it's not mine anyway. Ah!

Mr. Jackson?

My God! I am really trying hard to be supportive right now,

My grandfather. I just can't believe I...

Never been hunting, period.

NICK: Daria! Ah!

Nick?

No one will believe her. She knows that.

No, it's not. I'm not impressed.

No, no, it's OK.

No, not them.

No!

No! No!

No! No! No! No!

No! We go and come back for help!

No.

No.

No. Danny would never do that, Rod! Danny would never do that!

No. Like I said, we just got here, so...

No. You only think you do.

No...

Not everybody, though. Look.

Not my company.

Not one had a complaint!

Not without you.

Nothing. Give that to me.

Now I thought I made myself clear!

Now quit!

Now that's what you want.

Now to get you out of those bloody things.

Now we check the blood trail.

Now you disrespect this room?

Now you keep doing what you're doing you're gonna ruin this for all of us!

Now, don't you be that way. I patched up all my brothers one time or another.

Now, go find your rooms, OK?

Now, you boys had your fun with those bikers.

Now. Go, go, chug!

Of course. They're hot springs, you goof.

Oh, and they look to be in perfect condition.

Oh, Bryan! These are Hepplewhite!

Oh, come on, stop. She was just trying to help.

Oh, fuck this!

Oh, fuck. (BREATHING HEAVILY)

Oh, I'm not up for seeing my sister naked, but thank you, though.

Oh, is there a reward?

Oh, my God! Is that real gold?

Oh, my God! You just don't know when to shut up!

Oh, my God.

Oh, shit.

Oh, we're just the first wave.

Oh, well, our friend inherited it.

Oh, yeah, big time. Big man. Big man hunter.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Remember the little gaggle of old ladies?

Oh, yeah. The Daughters of the Revolution?

Oh, you know. Just feeling some love tonight.

Oh!

OK, Mom.

OK.

OK. Fine.

On that bus or not.

On the plus side, it's how we found you.

On, my God. (SOBBING)

One, two, three!

Only if Wednesday Adams is on a break.

Ooh...

Or a Hollywood scandal, who'd give a shit?

Or not. Here, pull from that end. Pull from that. Slow, slow, slow!

Or the brain.

Or... a meth empire.

Others tried to chisel in on what we'd earned,

Our blood is still true.

Our devotion was strong and rewarded, but when it was weak...

Our little place in the country.

Out hunting.

Over here! Ah!

Please tell me you got a camera for this.

Please. Give it a feel.

Poor puppy!

Purity...

Ready? On three.

Really, Rod? Me fixing a tire is so amazing?

Reaped its rewards, the coal, the timber.

Restoring Hobb Springs. Top to bottom.

Rod? You said that we'd all make a great web series.

SALLY: Don't worry, they'll be checking out today and then we'll have the place

SALLY: Don't you fret, lover.

SALLY: I'm sure this is already so overwhelming for you.

SALLY: Stop!

SALLY: Ya'll come on in.

Same thing around these parts.

See, how do you preserve family strength?

See, only true blood will keep this family alive.

See, what was tradition became ritual.

Seeing how much of an inheritance this really is.

She and Bry were always going on about selling things off.

She's just being protective. They all are.

Shhh...

Shit!

Shit!

Shit!

Show me.

Sick. You're sick.

Sister, he won't be able to resist you.

So he didn't have to do any work.

So I heard a buck, your first time shooting.

So it's been for generations.

So secret passages really do exist.

So you really are brother and sister?

So you think you know all of our secrets now?

So, like, what's the plan with the cameras, dude?

Something that I gave up on years ago.

Sorry if it stings, sweetie.

Spas don't come with their own outhouse, Bryan.

Speaking of which, time to introduce you to the hunt.

Stick to our own...

Still kind of cool, though, right?

Sure thing, officer.

Take a look at this picture and tell me if I should be.

Take him to the kitchen.

Teddy Roosevelt, Calvin Coolidge, and Jefferson Davis.

Tell me what you wanna do, honey.

Tell you what.

Thanks, Toni, having only known him since freshman year.

Thanks, Vic.

That guy with the fancy car and girl to match.

That we really know nothing about! How do you not get that?

That'd be them. Poor things can't remember if this woman got back

That's for the lady. That's for you.

That's hardly a proper view, miss,

That's more like it.

That's not like them, though.

That's pretty cool, actually.

That's right, Danny. Family. Uncle, cousin.

That's very good.

That's why he's staying.

The buck may hang in there, but they will die soon enough.

The charm of this place?

The Craytons, the Boggles and the Hillickers.

The fact they stopped at all is a small miracle.

The first sanitarium in America outside Battle Creek.

The neck.

The ones that do, they don't survive.

The rest of it is just simple business sense

The whole history of this hotel's up here.

Then why are you gonna make me say it?

There was dancing.

There we go, there we go.

There were three families back in those days.

There's members of the family that have been aching to meet you.

There's no sense waiting.

There's nothing to fear, sweetie. There's nothing to fear.

There's room for everybody!

There's so many things we need to explain, we're just not sure how.

There's something about this place.

These pictures only go up to the '70s.

These... are perfect.

They ain't gonna like it.

They call this a spa?

They keep priceless antiques out in the open.

They're cousins. No, brother and sister.

They're dead!

They're kind of good looking for hillbillies.

They're my old life. This... this is my new one.

They're screwing.

Think she's gonna help Vic take off his clothes too?

This doesn't belong to somebody?

This is huge!

This is not your home.

This is Staffordshire.

This place is alive. It has history, secrets.

This would go a hell of a lot faster if we knew what Danny had in mind.

Time to climb up.

To be a few defects along the way.

To fill me with a baby.

To get me back in the firm?

Toni will be here any second, so...

TONI: Danny?

TONI: Danny. We've been looking all over for you.

TONI: I guess this place just gives me the creeps.

TONI: Thank you.

TONI: Vic, get out of the car.

TONI: We have to get Danny to go.

TONI: What's, uh... (CLEARS THROAT)

TONI: Without asking you?

TONI: You guys, it's gigantic.

Toni! Toni!

Toni?

Took a long time. But it was important we found you.

Turned around.

Two thousand, at least.

Uh, maybe we could get our bags first.

Until we wrinkle.

Upper shoulder, neck or brain. Go.

Us? We were scared out of a sound sleep

VIC: I think we just met your cousins.

VIC: That guy kind of looks like Danny.

VIC: Water damage.

VIC: Where's he going now?

Wait a second. You're doing what?

Wait.

Wait. Are we really gonna do this?

Wanna see something really impressive?

Wanna start the healing process?

Was she trying to take these?

We are his family. That's why we're all here.

We build awareness.

We came hereto help him.

We can make more, if you'd like.

We can't just leave it like this.

We could all use a little guidance out there, please.

We got a flat,

We have more than enough meat back home. Come on.

We have them all meet Danny tonight.

We need keys to some of these places.

We need this.

We play this right,

We should pick up hunting.

We stick to our own.

We were supposed to be going back to the city.

We weren't expecting your friends, but, um...

We'll be right back. I'm gonna wash this off of my hands.

We'll carve him up later.

We'll keep trying and trying.

We'll leave you hereto rest a spell while we figure out

We're your family, Danny. The ones they killed.

We've gotta get out of here! He saw my face.

We've had all sorts stay here, including three presidents:

We've known each other since our clans first set foot in these hills.

We've known them for three years.

Weakened our family, muddied our blood.

Welcome to Hillicker Springs.

Welcome to Hobb Springs.

Well, go on now!

Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt to draw up a business plan.

Well, I guess you never really know anybody, huh?

Well, if you really wanna go back to nature...

Well, most people would approve.

Well, nice for him, huh?

Well, what about the rest of us, dude?

What are you doing?

What are you doing? (LAUGHS)

What better way to film a group of friends restoring a great landmark.

What did you do to him last night?

What do you mean?

What do you mean?

What do you mean?

What do you say, man?

What do you want to do?

What exactly were you doing with that?

What is that?

What the hell is that?

What then, sweetie?

What those boys did to you...

What?

What?

When it comes to money, Bryan's done worse.

When's that gonna be?

Where else have you checked for these?

Where have you been?

Where is Danny?

Where is he, Rod? We have to find him!

Where men can't get to it.

Whether he wants to or not.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Calm down.

Whoa, whoa!

Whoa, you GUYS

Whoo!

Whoo! It's hot!

Why don't you just let me get some sleep, please.

With them came others.

Wouldn't it be easier to use a flashlight?

Yeah, all they've ever been about is the quick and easy.

Yeah, have you? Have you checked into

Yeah, he just wandered through here a minute ago.

Yeah, I think you're forgetting that I don't have anywhere to go.

Yeah, man. Look. Compact and easy to hide.

Yeah, maybe some rooms. It's been a long drive.

Yeah, Vic didn't look so good either.

Yeah, with a bow and arrow.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. I could definitely cut a good sizzle reel together.

Yes!

Yes. Please.

You all see a bunch of little, old ladies be bopping around up there?

You almost lost me back there.

You can have anything you want.

You don't even know me.

You don't know me anymore. I've changed.

You don't say.

You eat people!

You folks just passing through?

You fucking hurt my sister. Huh?!

You fucking...

You going

You have a fantastic day, thank you.

You have a good eye, Danny. It belonged to your grandfather.

You have to be sure about these woods.

You just have some aches that need rubbing out.

You just...

You know what I saw today? Civil War era.

You know what, guys? I'm...

You know what? You guys can leave.

You know, getting Danny out in the open air,

You let your prey come to you.

You look gross. (LAUGHS)

You might as well take what you came for.

You OK?

You ready?

You rip the place down, subdivide the land,

You said you were game for writing a book about the history of this place.

You saw when you asked about Vic.

You see one mountain monster man, and you go cold turkey.

You sit right there.

You take one of these up there, do me a favor, show it around.

You think 'cause we're mountain folk, our ways ain't fit for fine society?

You wanna know something? Go ask them yourself.

You wanna see what firewater does to that pretty face?!

You were supposed to wait!

You weren't suited to that nonsense.

You'll be in me, one way or another.

You'll see.

You're gonna get yours now, girl!

You're murderers!

You're saying that they would just have sex here

You're so handsome.

You're supposed to be saving yourself for when the time's right.

You're taking too long, Danny.

You're very important to us.

You've checked yourself six times this morning.

Your girl, she really didn't want you to come.

Your head's hurt real bad.

(BRYAN GROANS, COUGHS) (SALLY MOANING)

(CACKLING) (SCREAMING)

(CACKLING) (SCREAMING)

(CRACKING) (SCREAMING)

(EXHALES DEEPLY) (LAUGHS)

(GIRL LAUGHING) (GROWLING)

(JACKSON YELLS) (SCREAMS)

(LAUGHING) Get the fuck off!

(LAUGHS) What are you doing?

(LAUGHS) Where is Danny?!

(MEN LAUGHING) (CAR DOORS SLAM)

(METAL RATTLING) (PANTING)

(SALLY MOANING) (ALL CACKLING)

(SCOFFS) We're really staying here? Why, what's wrong?

(SCREAMING) (BONES CRACKING)

(SCREAMING) (CACKLING)

(SCREECHES) (THUD)

(SCREECHING) (SCREAMING)

(SHOUTING) (SCREAMING)

(SOFT MUSIC PLAYS) (GIGGLING)

(STEAM HISSING) (SALLY GRUNTING)

(TONI SCREAMS) Ah!

A lot. (LAUGHS) Drinking?

Ahh! (LAUGHING)

all to ourselves. Oh, goody.

And all of you? We're blood.

and Nobu on Friday nights. Yeah. And look what that did to me.

And that's why we need you, Danny. Why?

and then got a little... Baked.

And who are you? JACKSON: This would be Sally.

Are you sure we don't... Sh!

But this place... Was great. And it can be again.

CHARLIE: Why so glum, sugarplum? Get that thing out of my face.

Come here. What are you, a hunter now?

Come on, back me up, Vic. Uh, sure.

Come on, guys. Sorry.

Come on! Don't!

Come on. Let's go find him. Thank you.

Danny has servants now? Hey, how you doing?

DANNY: All right, all right. Listen, we need to leave right now.

DANNY: Jackson? Sally? JACKSON: In here, Danny.

DANNY: Let's go. JACKSON: Come on.

DANNY: So you found me through Google? JACKSON: Yeah.

DANNY: Stop. I'm just saying, there's bound

DANNY: Stop. Seriously. You heard him!

DANNY: Who are all these people? JACKSON: They're all kin,

DANNY: You could say that again. And we're thrilled that you're

Danny! I know him.

Danny! She's from Wisconsin.

Danny. Come on, get off. Come on.

Danny. That's right, yeah.

DARIA: Are you OK? (PANTING)

Did you do all this? No.

Did you do something to him? But he liked it.

Did you fall? No. Someone fucking shot me.

Don't touch. Sorry.

Enough of that shit! They are the only ones

Especially my sister and Danny. Yeah.

Fit OK? I'm getting used to it.

from when I got here. Oh, my God. Sally?

Get! (GROWLS)

Go get some help! I can't leave you!

Go! OK.

Had a barbeque. Oh, yeah, sounds nice. Yeah.

Have you seen them anywhere? No.

He was hell with a bow. The bane of critters everywhere.

He'll be here real soon. I know.

Hey, come on. Come on. Don't! Don't touch me.

Hey, man. Ah!

Hold on. Charlie!

I killed a doe. Even better.

I need to talk to you. And we with you.