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Chappelle's Show - Season 3 Chappelle's Show was a groundbreaking comedy sketch show that aired on Comedy Central from 2003

Chappelle's Show - Season 3

Chappelle's Show was a groundbreaking comedy sketch show that aired on Comedy Central from 2003 to 2006. Created by and starring the incredibly talented Dave Chappelle, the show pushed the boundaries of humor, race, and social commentary.

Unfortunately, there is no Season 3 of Chappelle's Show, as the show came to an unexpected and abrupt end after the completion of its second season. Dave Chappelle, one of the most beloved and influential comedians of our time, made the decision to walk away from the show due to artistic and personal reasons. While fans eagerly awaited a third season, it unfortunately never came to fruition.

Chappelle's Show became a cultural phenomenon during its short run. The show featured a mix of hilarious sketches, poignant social commentary, and memorable characters. Dave Chappelle's writing and performance were nothing short of exceptional, and he was surrounded by a talented supporting cast that helped bring his sketches to life.

Some of the recurring characters and sketches that became fan favorites included:

1. Clayton Bigsby - A black white supremacist who was completely unaware of his own race.
2. Tyrone Biggums - A crack-addicted character who appeared in various skits throughout the show.
3. Rick James - A portrayal of the famous musician, played by Chappelle himself, that became a pop culture phenomenon with the catchphrase "I'm Rick James, b***h!"
4. The Players Haters Ball - A satirical awards show for haters, where a panel of characters hilariously insulted each other.
5. Charlie Murphy's True Hollywood Stories - Charlie Murphy, an older brother of Eddie Murphy, recounted wild stories involving encounters with famous celebrities, with re-enactments starring both Chappelle and Murphy.

The show also featured a wide range of musical guest performances, adding another layer of entertainment value. Some memorable musical moments included performances by artists such as Ludacris, Kanye West, Erykah Badu, and Common. The music acts on Chappelle's Show elevated the comedic sketches and added a musical dimension that was appreciated by fans.

Although Season 3 of Chappelle's Show never materialized, the impact and legacy of the first two seasons cannot be understated. Dave Chappelle tackled sensitive and controversial topics with humor and intelligence, and his ability to use comedy as a vehicle for social commentary was unparalleled.

While fans may not be able to enjoy a Season 3, the first two seasons of Chappelle's Show are available for viewing and can be appreciated for their wit, sharp writing, and iconic characters. The show's influence on the comedy landscape is still felt today, and its sketches continue to be quoted and remembered by fans around the world.

If you want to relive the magic of Chappelle's Show, the sounds and music from the show are available for playing and downloading here. Whether it's the unforgettable catchphrases, the hilarious skits, or the talented musical performances, Chappelle's Show will forever be remembered as a trailblazing comedy series that left an indelible mark on television history.

A baller?
A baller?
A little time out for Gary.
A little time out for Gary.
A lot of things have happened.
A lot of things have happened.
A sandwich.
A sandwich.
A staten island man is listed in stable condition tonight
A staten island man is listed in stable condition tonight
About America's premiere casting agent.
About America's premiere casting agent.
About not wearing no pants around the house?
About not wearing no pants around the house?
About the negative/positive comments.
About the negative/positive comments.
About what happened between us.
About what happened between us.
About what that girl said before
About what that girl said before
Actually, I was talking about mummies.
Actually, I was talking about mummies.
Africa Africa?
Africa Africa?
Africa.
Africa.
After a brutal assault by rapper method man
After a brutal assault by rapper method man
After these messages.
After these messages.
After these messages.
After these messages.
Ah ah.
Ah ah.
Ah, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Ah, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Ah, you people are always late.
Ah, you people are always late.
Ah...
Ah...
Ah...
Ah...
Ahh!
Ahh!
Ain't this a bitch.
Ain't this a bitch.
All hip hop ain't exactly newsworthy in my opinion.
All hip hop ain't exactly newsworthy in my opinion.
All right, come on y'all, let's get out of here.
All right, come on y'all, let's get out of here.
All right, here it comes.
All right, here it comes.
All right, I didn't say nothing,
All right, I didn't say nothing,
All right, I need a minute, girl.
All right, I need a minute, girl.
All right, man, let me get my checkbook
All right, man, let me get my checkbook
All right, open 'em!
All right, open 'em!
All right, what's your comment?
All right, what's your comment?
All right, you all set.
All right, you all set.
All right.
All right.
All right. But for $11,000...
All right. But for $11,000...
All the sketches were funny.
All the sketches were funny.
All these years I walked around with that weight
All these years I walked around with that weight
And besides, I am a sagittarius.
And besides, I am a sagittarius.
And black and white observations!
And black and white observations!
And both of us had our own "ka chung!" Moment.
And both of us had our own "ka chung!" Moment.
And Dave had to find out a real crazy way
And Dave had to find out a real crazy way
And even if it is being a responsible comedy show,
And even if it is being a responsible comedy show,
And fried chicken is bad.
And fried chicken is bad.
And he thought he saw the pixie again.
And he thought he saw the pixie again.
And he's legit now.
And he's legit now.
And hear you guys, you know,
And hear you guys, you know,
And his greasy granny has holes in her panties!
And his greasy granny has holes in her panties!
And I always knew from the bottom of my heart
And I always knew from the bottom of my heart
And I happen to have both of 'em.
And I happen to have both of 'em.
And I might say, "flip over."
And I might say, "flip over."
And I really don't like doing that anymore.
And I really don't like doing that anymore.
And I support the president.
And I support the president.
And I think I'm about to get that promotion.
And I think I'm about to get that promotion.
And I want you to know that I'm really sorry
And I want you to know that I'm really sorry
And I wish you wouldn't bring it up.
And I wish you wouldn't bring it up.
And I'll throw in the Jesus air freshener for free.
And I'll throw in the Jesus air freshener for free.
And I'm gonna be like this, "byah!"
And I'm gonna be like this, "byah!"
And I'm gonna chop that motherfucking desk in half!
And I'm gonna chop that motherfucking desk in half!
And I'm here to say a few words
And I'm here to say a few words
And I'm quoting her, "it."
And I'm quoting her, "it."
And I'm really just trying to focus on what my life is now.
And I'm really just trying to focus on what my life is now.
And I'm, like I like comedy.
And I'm, like I like comedy.
And I've always appreciated that about this show.
And I've always appreciated that about this show.
And immediately identify the solution.
And immediately identify the solution.
And it gets people talking and laughing.
And it gets people talking and laughing.
And it's funny to hear Dave chappelle do it,
And it's funny to hear Dave chappelle do it,
And laugh at each other like that.
And laugh at each other like that.
And left it for, like, 40 minutes
And left it for, like, 40 minutes
And left it for, like, 40 minutes.
And left it for, like, 40 minutes.
And look, look
And look, look
And most of all, thanks for helping us all
And most of all, thanks for helping us all
And nobody can find toilet paper?
And nobody can find toilet paper?
And north Dakota and new Mexico!
And north Dakota and new Mexico!
And not just black people always feeling like
And not just black people always feeling like
And not only is his daughter a lesbian,
And not only is his daughter a lesbian,
And now I feel like you lifted it.
And now I feel like you lifted it.
And now it's like he's in the room
And now it's like he's in the room
And now, a hip hop newsbreak with Chuck Taylor.
And now, a hip hop newsbreak with Chuck Taylor.
And of course, the method man.
And of course, the method man.
And Oregon and Washington and Michigan!
And Oregon and Washington and Michigan!
And put him in a headlock and say, "bah!"
And put him in a headlock and say, "bah!"
And see how people communicate,
And see how people communicate,
And see how y'all felt about that.
And see how y'all felt about that.
And she be like, "how'd melle Mel get in the bed?"
And she be like, "how'd melle Mel get in the bed?"
And she's a racist.
And she's a racist.
And shit just gets weird.
And shit just gets weird.
And so as long as we're thinking about it, it's a good thing.
And so as long as we're thinking about it, it's a good thing.
And special interests.
And special interests.
And talk about it and make it funny.
And talk about it and make it funny.
And that was a white guy too.
And that was a white guy too.
And that, you know, they listen to rock music,
And that, you know, they listen to rock music,
And that's not baller to me.
And that's not baller to me.
And that's really preachy, I feel,
And that's really preachy, I feel,
And the fact is, worldwide, white people are the
And the fact is, worldwide, white people are the
And the funny thing, like, before Dave had all this money,
And the funny thing, like, before Dave had all this money,
And the line starts all the way at the bottom.
And the line starts all the way at the bottom.
And then
And then
And then he banged them shits with a spiked bat, like "bow!"
And then he banged them shits with a spiked bat, like "bow!"
And then he stuck it in his ass real slow.
And then he stuck it in his ass real slow.
And then I'm coming all the way to Washington, D.C.
And then I'm coming all the way to Washington, D.C.
And then I'm gonna grab the secret service like this
And then I'm gonna grab the secret service like this
And then I'm gonna wash up. I'm gonna wash up.
And then I'm gonna wash up. I'm gonna wash up.
And then we're going straight into my bedroom,
And then we're going straight into my bedroom,
And then we're going to Washington, D.C.
And then we're going to Washington, D.C.
And then, he sewed my asshole shut.
And then, he sewed my asshole shut.
And they call you minority
And they call you minority
And they fell off the back of a truck.
And they fell off the back of a truck.
And they're like, "Connecticut,"
And they're like, "Connecticut,"
And two, makes my dookie twinkle, man.
And two, makes my dookie twinkle, man.
And watermelon is a delicious fruit.
And watermelon is a delicious fruit.
And we like shuckin' and jive."
And we like shuckin' and jive."
And we work something out, all right?
And we work something out, all right?
And we're going to California and Texas and New York!
And we're going to California and Texas and New York!
And we're going to South Dakota
And we're going to South Dakota
And we're like, "byah!"
And we're like, "byah!"
And what's the what's the other big word they like to use?
And what's the what's the other big word they like to use?
And when they do talk about us, what word do they use?
And when they do talk about us, what word do they use?
And whenever there's a bill to be split up,
And whenever there's a bill to be split up,
And why don't you see these nuts?
And why don't you see these nuts?
And you figured the reason why they ain't like you
And you figured the reason why they ain't like you
And you, you fuckin' gauze wrapped, stanky ass,
And you, you fuckin' gauze wrapped, stanky ass,
And your hyundai's all set.
And your hyundai's all set.
And, I mean, I'm *******, and whenever I go out,
And, I mean, I'm *******, and whenever I go out,
And, like, everybody should just be easy.
And, like, everybody should just be easy.
And, like, I understand it.
And, like, I understand it.
And, like, sometimes I feel like they say certain things
And, like, sometimes I feel like they say certain things
And, remember, no matter how big his dick is,
And, remember, no matter how big his dick is,
And, you know, a white person turns around says,
And, you know, a white person turns around says,
Another big scandal was the Gary Coleman scandal.
Another big scandal was the Gary Coleman scandal.
Are black or brown.
Are black or brown.
Argh!
Argh!
As a hispanic person, I don't think it's any different
As a hispanic person, I don't think it's any different
As black men, we have to stick together.
As black men, we have to stick together.
As we all know, money changes everything, right?
As we all know, money changes everything, right?
As you may or may not have heard,
As you may or may not have heard,
Ashy Larry?
Ashy Larry?
At least I can button my lip.
At least I can button my lip.
At least you run the God damn world.
At least you run the God damn world.
At one point during the altercation,
At one point during the altercation,
At this point, method man is still at large,
At this point, method man is still at large,
Aw, c'mon dog.
Aw, c'mon dog.
Aw, come on, man, the sign say $28.
Aw, come on, man, the sign say $28.
Aw, man, I'm about to be late again!
Aw, man, I'm about to be late again!
Aw, never gon' make it, man.
Aw, never gon' make it, man.
Aw, shut up, slave.
Aw, shut up, slave.
Ay, c'mon, man, you scratching your balls over my breakfast!
Ay, c'mon, man, you scratching your balls over my breakfast!
B.E.T.'S top ten live.
B.E.T.'S top ten live.
Back in the game, baby!
Back in the game, baby!
Bah!
Bah!
Bah!
Bah!
Bah!
Bah!
Baller!
Baller!
Banning you from the club was the biggest mistake
Banning you from the club was the biggest mistake
Be strong.
Be strong.
Because I've been wanting to apologize to you for years.
Because I've been wanting to apologize to you for years.
Because of the hard work I put in,
Because of the hard work I put in,
Because our stereotypes are more absurd, some people feel.
Because our stereotypes are more absurd, some people feel.
Because we all think about it,
Because we all think about it,
Because you were afraid of the way, you know,
Because you were afraid of the way, you know,
Because, you know, fried chicken, it's all light,
Because, you know, fried chicken, it's all light,
Before it gets you fucked up?
Before it gets you fucked up?
Bitch. What...
Bitch. What...
Boing!
Boing!
Boing!
Boing!
Both of you...
Both of you...
Brown musicians!
Brown musicians!
But don't take my word for it.
But don't take my word for it.
But his mom's a lesbian, and his sister's a lesbian,
But his mom's a lesbian, and his sister's a lesbian,
But I don't really want to come to the office
But I don't really want to come to the office
But I hold in my hand an advertisement
But I hold in my hand an advertisement
But I just want you to know that I'm sorry...
But I just want you to know that I'm sorry...
But I think the problems lies in the ignorant people at home
But I think the problems lies in the ignorant people at home
But I want y'all to know somethin'.
But I want y'all to know somethin'.
But I'm about to get promoted anyway.
But I'm about to get promoted anyway.
But if you watch Dave chappelle, you see this sketch,
But if you watch Dave chappelle, you see this sketch,
But it plays on the good stereotypes of white people.
But it plays on the good stereotypes of white people.
But one of the shows I hate on tv the most,
But one of the shows I hate on tv the most,
But some of the issues
But some of the issues
But that's not bad.
But that's not bad.
But the chicken's quite good.
But the chicken's quite good.
But the fact is, in this state,
But the fact is, in this state,
But the only problem is, yeah, you included everybody,
But the only problem is, yeah, you included everybody,
But the white race is seen as more of like the generic race,
But the white race is seen as more of like the generic race,
But then you see a sketch like this,
But then you see a sketch like this,
But to play on the "we like chicken,
But to play on the "we like chicken,
But you on tv, son. Fuck it, man.
But you on tv, son. Fuck it, man.
But your greed did this to me, Dave.
But your greed did this to me, Dave.
But, see, I like to cut the middleman.
But, see, I like to cut the middleman.
But, you know, he kind of makes it comfortable to talk about it.
But, you know, he kind of makes it comfortable to talk about it.
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah!
Byah! Byah!
Byah! Byah!
Byah! Got you all a check
Byah! Got you all a check
Byah! I love lesbians! Byah!
Byah! I love lesbians! Byah!
Bye. Thank you.
Bye. Thank you.
C'mon, dog, listen, this is the first date I had
C'mon, dog, listen, this is the first date I had
Can I be honest with you for a second, papa?
Can I be honest with you for a second, papa?
Can we interest you in anything else today
Can we interest you in anything else today
Carr her rara.
Carr her rara.
Carr her rara.
Carr her rara.
Chappelle's show after commercial.
Chappelle's show after commercial.
Charles barkley?
Charles barkley?
Charlie Murphy is not mad at Dave chappelle.
Charlie Murphy is not mad at Dave chappelle.
Charo!
Charo!
Check her pockets.
Check her pockets.
Check it out.
Check it out.
Check it out.
Check it out.
Check it out.
Check it out.
Check it out.
Check it out.
Check this out.
Check this out.
Check this out.
Check this out.
Check this out.
Check this out.
Check this out.
Check this out.
Check this shit out.
Check this shit out.
Check this shit out.
Check this shit out.
Check this shit out.
Check this shit out.
Chicken!
Chicken!
Come in y'all household every fucking week.
Come in y'all household every fucking week.
Come on in, you broke motherfuckers.
Come on in, you broke motherfuckers.
Come on, get to cuttin'.
Come on, get to cuttin'.
Come on, girl. Push.
Come on, girl. Push.
Come on, homes, it's fucking leopard, man.
Come on, homes, it's fucking leopard, man.
Come on, let's get it over with.
Come on, let's get it over with.
Come on, motherfuckers. Keep up.
Come on, motherfuckers. Keep up.
Come on, talk to me!
Come on, talk to me!
Come with me.
Come with me.
Congratulations on all your success.
Congratulations on all your success.
Congratulations on two good seasons.
Congratulations on two good seasons.
Congratulations to Dave chappelle!
Congratulations to Dave chappelle!
Cribs?
Cribs?
Crunking with his bitch's emotions this July 11th.
Crunking with his bitch's emotions this July 11th.
Damn fool
Damn fool
Damn it.
Damn it.
Damn slave!
Damn slave!
Damn this b.E.T.
Damn this b.E.T.
Damn, that shit stinks.
Damn, that shit stinks.
Damn.
Damn.
Dave chappelle cereal!
Dave chappelle cereal!
Dave chappelle left the show.
Dave chappelle left the show.
Dave chappelle, going once...
Dave chappelle, going once...
Dave chappelle, going twice...
Dave chappelle, going twice...
Dave chappelle.
Dave chappelle.
Dave chappelle.
Dave chappelle.
Dave said he has some problems with the pixie sketch.
Dave said he has some problems with the pixie sketch.
Dave, I don't know what to say.
Dave, I don't know what to say.
Dave, I'm running out of ideas here.
Dave, I'm running out of ideas here.
Dave?
Dave?
David.
David.
Do me a favor, squirt, run get your mom.
Do me a favor, squirt, run get your mom.
Do you know what you'd like for your in flight meal?
Do you know what you'd like for your in flight meal?
Do you love me?
Do you love me?
Do you think about it like, "I wasn't being an asshole.
Do you think about it like, "I wasn't being an asshole.
Do you want a sandwich?
Do you want a sandwich?
Do you?
Do you?
Do you?
Do you?
Does that change anything now that you see we did
Does that change anything now that you see we did
Don't clap too soon.
Don't clap too soon.
Don't freak her!
Don't freak her!
Don't hire her 'cause she sucks ass,
Don't hire her 'cause she sucks ass,
Don't let that scare you.
Don't let that scare you.
Don't you worry. Must've drank a 40 ounce.
Don't you worry. Must've drank a 40 ounce.
Donnell rawlings and Charlie Murphy!
Donnell rawlings and Charlie Murphy!
Down to... Byah!
Down to... Byah!
Each of these bitches is 4 million years old apiece, son.
Each of these bitches is 4 million years old apiece, son.
Eddie Murphy's brother.
Eddie Murphy's brother.
Eight years ago at an audition,
Eight years ago at an audition,
End up in the chair?
End up in the chair?
Enough said, man.
Enough said, man.
Entrepreneurship here in America, and few
Entrepreneurship here in America, and few
Especially being a black man, is the news.
Especially being a black man, is the news.
Even if, like, your friend called you on the phone
Even if, like, your friend called you on the phone
Every now and then, I would notice that Dave had
Every now and then, I would notice that Dave had
Every time I try to show you, it's as if...
Every time I try to show you, it's as if...
Everybody got they dunks and they jords
Everybody got they dunks and they jords
Everybody has an inner racism.
Everybody has an inner racism.
Everybody likes chicken,
Everybody likes chicken,
Everyone gets nervous the first time they meet show business.
Everyone gets nervous the first time they meet show business.
Everything's all right in candyland.
Everything's all right in candyland.
Exactly, because, again, the white race is the generic race,
Exactly, because, again, the white race is the generic race,
Except p. Diddy.
Except p. Diddy.
Exclusive, here's that new Tupac.
Exclusive, here's that new Tupac.
Excuse me, gentlemen. I'm sorry. I'm a little on edge.
Excuse me, gentlemen. I'm sorry. I'm a little on edge.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Fags.
Fags.
Fast songs, slow songs.
Fast songs, slow songs.
Fire one shot.
Fire one shot.
Firing one shot.
Firing one shot.
First he put my nuts on the dresser.
First he put my nuts on the dresser.
Five, six, seven seconds!
Five, six, seven seconds!
Following an argument.
Following an argument.
For breaking one measly chimney.
For breaking one measly chimney.
For donnell rawlings and Charlie Murphy!
For donnell rawlings and Charlie Murphy!
For donnell rawlings and Charlie Murphy!
For donnell rawlings and Charlie Murphy!
For Jerry Jacobs casting.
For Jerry Jacobs casting.
For other people to look at other races
For other people to look at other races
For you banning me.
For you banning me.
For your car, sir?
For your car, sir?
Frank, Frank, you gotta relax.
Frank, Frank, you gotta relax.
Frank, I don't want to beat around the bush.
Frank, I don't want to beat around the bush.
Frank, the man whose arm you tore off
Frank, the man whose arm you tore off
Frank...
Frank...
Freeze!
Freeze!
Freeze!
Freeze!
Freeze!
Freeze!
Fried chicken. I need some music for this.
Fried chicken. I need some music for this.
From everybody involved with chappelle's show.
From everybody involved with chappelle's show.
From when we make jokes about ourselves.
From when we make jokes about ourselves.
From your co workers.
From your co workers.
Fuck all that scientology shit.
Fuck all that scientology shit.
Fuck it.
Fuck it.
Fuck no, ****a...
Fuck no, ****a...
Fuck shoe closet;
Fuck shoe closet;
Fuck that shit.
Fuck that shit.
Fuck this shit, man.
Fuck this shit, man.
Fuckin' racists!
Fuckin' racists!
Funny thing Dave was watching an episode of mtv cribs.
Funny thing Dave was watching an episode of mtv cribs.
Gary Coleman was a security guard.
Gary Coleman was a security guard.
Gary Coleman?
Gary Coleman?
Get buck naked.
Get buck naked.
Get off the trampoline! Stop playing with it.
Get off the trampoline! Stop playing with it.
Get out.
Get out.
Get revenge on somebody you had a grudge against?
Get revenge on somebody you had a grudge against?
Get that coat some peanuts.
Get that coat some peanuts.
Girl, I didn't get no divorce we're happy as hell!
Girl, I didn't get no divorce we're happy as hell!
Girl, you're gonna have to change the station, for real.
Girl, you're gonna have to change the station, for real.
Give him a round of applause!
Give him a round of applause!
Give it a week.
Give it a week.
Give me a hug. Give me a hug.
Give me a hug. Give me a hug.
Give me some.
Give me some.
Give you a hug and give him some rub.
Give you a hug and give him some rub.
Go ahead, pull your pistol out,
Go ahead, pull your pistol out,
Go ahead.
Go ahead.
Go back to your husband.
Go back to your husband.
Go on, do what you gon' do! Impress your white friends!
Go on, do what you gon' do! Impress your white friends!
Go on, order you a big bucket, ****a, and take a bite!
Go on, order you a big bucket, ****a, and take a bite!
Go out to lunch.
Go out to lunch.
God damn!
God damn!
Goddamn, that shit smells wild.
Goddamn, that shit smells wild.
Goddamn!
Goddamn!
Goddamn!
Goddamn!
Goddamn.
Goddamn.
Goin' from Washington down to Vermont
Goin' from Washington down to Vermont
Good evening, I'm Chuck Taylor.
Good evening, I'm Chuck Taylor.
Good God! Whoo eee, that smell wild!
Good God! Whoo eee, that smell wild!
Good night!
Good night!
Good night!
Good night!
Good night.
Good night.
Got a meeting with my boss today,
Got a meeting with my boss today,
Got a question for y'all.
Got a question for y'all.
Got some bad news for you.
Got some bad news for you.
Great work!
Great work!
Great. Thanks, man.
Great. Thanks, man.
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelu hallelu hallelujah!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelu hallelu hallelujah!
Have a seat.
Have a seat.
Have cold grits or somethin' to eat.
Have cold grits or somethin' to eat.
He did two?
He did two?
He mixed up everything!
He mixed up everything!
He sets policy for this administration,
He sets policy for this administration,
He was really a security guard.
He was really a security guard.
He works at the doughnut shop
He works at the doughnut shop
He's black.
He's black.
He's done his research.
He's done his research.
He's in a wheelchair too, man.
He's in a wheelchair too, man.
He's rakin' it in on the new season of the chappelle show,
He's rakin' it in on the new season of the chappelle show,
Hello, David.
Hello, David.
Hello, gorgeous.
Hello, gorgeous.
Hello, Mr. chappelle.
Hello, Mr. chappelle.
Hello, police?
Hello, police?
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Help us. Robot, help us.
Help us. Robot, help us.
Her? It's over between us.
Her? It's over between us.
Here you go, sir.
Here you go, sir.
Herro, rara.
Herro, rara.
Herro, rara.
Herro, rara.
Herro, rara. Herro, rara.
Herro, rara. Herro, rara.
Hey, Dave, it's me, alf.
Hey, Dave, it's me, alf.
Hey, have you ever been in a situation
Hey, have you ever been in a situation
Hey, help us, robot. Help us.
Hey, help us, robot. Help us.
Hey, help us, robot. Help us. Help us.
Hey, help us, robot. Help us. Help us.
Hey, hey! What the fuck, man?
Hey, hey! What the fuck, man?
Hey, I'm Dave chappelle,
Hey, I'm Dave chappelle,
Hey, little fella, is your, uh, is your dad around?
Hey, little fella, is your, uh, is your dad around?
Hey, little fella.
Hey, little fella.
Hey, look, y'all, y'all got to stay where you at
Hey, look, y'all, y'all got to stay where you at
Hey, look.
Hey, look.
Hey, mom, what's for breakfast?
Hey, mom, what's for breakfast?
Hey, red eagle, this is Gary.
Hey, red eagle, this is Gary.
Hey, shonda,
Hey, shonda,
Hey, wolfie, what'd I tell you
Hey, wolfie, what'd I tell you
Hey, y'all remember when, when Chuck d said
Hey, y'all remember when, when Chuck d said
Hey, yo.
Hey, yo.
Hey!
Hey!
Hey! Hey! Get off the trampoline!
Hey! Hey! Get off the trampoline!
Hi, Charlie.
Hi, Charlie.
Hi, thank you.
Hi, thank you.
Hi, thank you.
Hi, thank you.
Hi, yoshi.
Hi, yoshi.
Hispanic people, don't get it twisted.
Hispanic people, don't get it twisted.
Hold me down!
Hold me down!
Hold on, hold on. Look at that squirrel skin coat.
Hold on, hold on. Look at that squirrel skin coat.
Holy shit, it's Dave chappelle!
Holy shit, it's Dave chappelle!
Honk! Honk!
Honk! Honk!
Hope I'm not interrupting.
Hope I'm not interrupting.
How can you resist?
How can you resist?
How is it prepared?
How is it prepared?
How many squirrels must die for you to look fly?
How many squirrels must die for you to look fly?
How much Dave really was worth or how much he had
How much Dave really was worth or how much he had
How much I owe you, man?
How much I owe you, man?
How much I owe you?
How much I owe you?
How would you like to be on mtv cribs?
How would you like to be on mtv cribs?
How you gonna get $25 million out of me
How you gonna get $25 million out of me
How'd the white man get two pixies?
How'd the white man get two pixies?
How's that sandwich coming?
How's that sandwich coming?
Howard Dean was running for president?
Howard Dean was running for president?
Huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Huh? Hah?
Huh? Hah?
Hulk hogan choked one out for me in China for my birthday.
Hulk hogan choked one out for me in China for my birthday.
I agree with him, but only partially, 'cause, see,
I agree with him, but only partially, 'cause, see,
I ain't playin' this shit today.
I ain't playin' this shit today.
I ain't want to be up here doing this.
I ain't want to be up here doing this.
I always overpay just so nobody brings up the stereotype.
I always overpay just so nobody brings up the stereotype.
I am the great and powerful show business.
I am the great and powerful show business.
I aporogize!
I aporogize!
I better hurry up.
I better hurry up.
I came here to get revenge on you, man.
I came here to get revenge on you, man.
I come from an interracial family,
I come from an interracial family,
I do all right, but nothin' to write home about.
I do all right, but nothin' to write home about.
I don't I feel like so when get out,
I don't I feel like so when get out,
I don't believe this, man.
I don't believe this, man.
I don't believe this, man.
I don't believe this, man.
I don't even know anymore.
I don't even know anymore.
I don't even know anymore.
I don't even know anymore.
I don't know about that show, man.
I don't know about that show, man.
I don't know about you, but I want some doughnuts.
I don't know about you, but I want some doughnuts.
I don't know about you; I'm getting mine.
I don't know about you; I'm getting mine.
I don't know how you saw me.
I don't know how you saw me.
I don't know, man.
I don't know, man.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't really fuck with Africa,
I don't really fuck with Africa,
I don't really want to put myself
I don't really want to put myself
I don't think he's coming.
I don't think he's coming.
I don't think he's coming.
I don't think he's coming.
I don't think he's coming.
I don't think he's coming.
I don't think it's the responsibility of the show
I don't think it's the responsibility of the show
I don't think that's gonna be good for 90 minutes.
I don't think that's gonna be good for 90 minutes.
I don't think this is gonna be enough for everybody.
I don't think this is gonna be enough for everybody.
I ever made.
I ever made.
I feel like it's derogatory to black and Spanish people,
I feel like it's derogatory to black and Spanish people,
I forgot I did that.
I forgot I did that.
I get out with my co workers,
I get out with my co workers,
I got a tax policy that'll break your neck
I got a tax policy that'll break your neck
I got an inner racism in me.
I got an inner racism in me.
I got into a bad car accident a few years ago
I got into a bad car accident a few years ago
I got my own sweatshop, ****a.
I got my own sweatshop, ****a.
I got these bitches working 16 hours straight.
I got these bitches working 16 hours straight.
I got this, baby.
I got this, baby.
I got to say, this lady here has meant so much to me, man,
I got to say, this lady here has meant so much to me, man,
I got you. Come on. Oh, yeah, come on.
I got you. Come on. Oh, yeah, come on.
I gotta go see my probation officer.
I gotta go see my probation officer.
I have a confession to make.
I have a confession to make.
I have one word for you... Are you listening?
I have one word for you... Are you listening?
I have to agree.
I have to agree.
I heard that on the radio on the way up here.
I heard that on the radio on the way up here.
I just realized, we are all out of the fish.
I just realized, we are all out of the fish.
I just want to say, I think everybody is
I just want to say, I think everybody is
I just wish I had...
I just wish I had...
I know that ad time on the super bowl is expensive,
I know that ad time on the super bowl is expensive,
I know that's wrong, but I was just so mad all these years
I know that's wrong, but I was just so mad all these years
I know this doesn't mean anything to you,
I know this doesn't mean anything to you,
I know... I already know that.
I know... I already know that.
I laughed.
I laughed.
I like this show because it's kind of a relaxed way
I like this show because it's kind of a relaxed way
I love that!
I love that!
I love you.
I love you.
I mean, everybody does it.
I mean, everybody does it.
I mean, for Pete's sake, David, we were all just kids.
I mean, for Pete's sake, David, we were all just kids.
I mean, how were you gonna know
I mean, how were you gonna know
I mean, it's not.
I mean, it's not.
I mean, you know, they'll throw a little "son" in there,
I mean, you know, they'll throw a little "son" in there,
I need a taxi.
I need a taxi.
I need a taxi. That's what I need.
I need a taxi. That's what I need.
I need all the camera time I can get, ****a!
I need all the camera time I can get, ****a!
I need you to know the depth of my feelings for you.
I need you to know the depth of my feelings for you.
I never said that.
I never said that.
I pay you $4,000 a week to hold me down, ****a.
I pay you $4,000 a week to hold me down, ****a.
I said, "I said, 'flip over.'"
I said, "I said, 'flip over.'"
I saw Tupac on 42nd street
I saw Tupac on 42nd street
I see soft place to die.
I see soft place to die.
I should bite the shit out of this motherfucker!
I should bite the shit out of this motherfucker!
I sprinkle diamonds on everything I eat.
I sprinkle diamonds on everything I eat.
I swear to
I swear to
I tell you something else too.
I tell you something else too.
I think he did an exceptional job.
I think he did an exceptional job.
I think I have just the thing.
I think I have just the thing.
I think maybe we're moving too fast.
I think maybe we're moving too fast.
I think people need to stop being so sensitive.
I think people need to stop being so sensitive.
I think that Dave has always did a good job
I think that Dave has always did a good job
I think that's the joy.
I think that's the joy.
I think the mission is done.
I think the mission is done.
I thought it was a lot like the racial draft,
I thought it was a lot like the racial draft,
I thought it was funny, 'cause, you know
I thought it was funny, 'cause, you know
I thought it was funny. I thought it was intelligent.
I thought it was funny. I thought it was intelligent.
I thought the sketch was cool,
I thought the sketch was cool,
I want to eat something fun.
I want to eat something fun.
I want you to close your eyes, I got a surprise for you.
I want you to close your eyes, I got a surprise for you.
I want you to know that...
I want you to know that...
I want you to marry me.
I want you to marry me.
I was a little uncomfortable about it too; I'm not gonna lie.
I was a little uncomfortable about it too; I'm not gonna lie.
I was gonna burn your club down.
I was gonna burn your club down.
I was just thinking that maybe, you know,
I was just thinking that maybe, you know,
I was standing right
I was standing right
I was talking about you with Jay rizzo.
I was talking about you with Jay rizzo.
I was thinking maybe I'd stay true to myself,
I was thinking maybe I'd stay true to myself,
I watched the l word on showtime!
I watched the l word on showtime!
I would die for you.
I would die for you.
I'd like to propose a toast...
I'd like to propose a toast...
I'll have the fish. Thank you very much.
I'll have the fish. Thank you very much.
I'll have the fried chicken. Thank you.
I'll have the fried chicken. Thank you.
I'll send a jet for you to bring you to my home.
I'll send a jet for you to bring you to my home.
I'm a little nervous.
I'm a little nervous.
I'm a pixie.
I'm a pixie.
I'm afraid I have to let you go.
I'm afraid I have to let you go.
I'm afraid of them.
I'm afraid of them.
I'm broke, bitch!
I'm broke, bitch!
I'm cashing that shit at a liquor store
I'm cashing that shit at a liquor store
I'm charging you with shoplifting, miss.
I'm charging you with shoplifting, miss.
I'm Chuck Taylor.
I'm Chuck Taylor.
I'm dead.
I'm dead.
I'm getting ready to become office manager.
I'm getting ready to become office manager.
I'm getting the hell out of here myself.
I'm getting the hell out of here myself.
I'm goin' ass to the glass!
I'm goin' ass to the glass!
I'm going all over the world,
I'm going all over the world,
I'm going platinum for the chappelle's show, bitch."
I'm going platinum for the chappelle's show, bitch."
I'm gonna get one more of these eggs.
I'm gonna get one more of these eggs.
I'm gonna grab my wife like this,
I'm gonna grab my wife like this,
I'm gonna have to take a little time out.
I'm gonna have to take a little time out.
I'm gonna have to turn the station.
I'm gonna have to turn the station.
I'm gonna kick open the door of the oval office,
I'm gonna kick open the door of the oval office,
I'm gonna take a look at your tax return.
I'm gonna take a look at your tax return.
I'm just joking!
I'm just joking!
I'm just saying!
I'm just saying!
I'm just saying! I'm just saying!
I'm just saying! I'm just saying!
I'm like, "you know what I'm talking about."
I'm like, "you know what I'm talking about."
I'm nervous. I got a big date today.
I'm nervous. I got a big date today.
I'm really glad you came here today
I'm really glad you came here today
I'm rich, bi atch!
I'm rich, bi atch!
I'm rich, bi atch!
I'm rich, bi atch!
I'm rich, bi atch!
I'm rich, bi atch!
I'm rich, biatch!
I'm rich, biatch!
I'm rich, bitch!
I'm rich, bitch!
I'm rich, biyatch!
I'm rich, biyatch!
I'm sorry to hear that, man.
I'm sorry to hear that, man.
I'm sorry, sir, we don't serve your kind here.
I'm sorry, sir, we don't serve your kind here.
I'm talking about a situation where, you know,
I'm talking about a situation where, you know,
I'm tired of tiptoeing around this office
I'm tired of tiptoeing around this office
I'm tryin' to blow up.
I'm tryin' to blow up.
I'ma pose a question to the audience right now.
I'ma pose a question to the audience right now.
I've actually met Dave, and the impression I got
I've actually met Dave, and the impression I got
I've been getting a lot of complaints about you
I've been getting a lot of complaints about you
I've been waiting for you.
I've been waiting for you.
I've eaten over the years from baller ass restaurants.
I've eaten over the years from baller ass restaurants.
I've got good news for all three of you.
I've got good news for all three of you.
I've loved you the entire time I've been away from you.
I've loved you the entire time I've been away from you.
If Elvis is live, Tupac is alive!
If Elvis is live, Tupac is alive!
If he touches you to the point to where you think about it,
If he touches you to the point to where you think about it,
If I got the ****a from green mile
If I got the ****a from green mile
If I see an Asian person, if I say, "where you from?"
If I see an Asian person, if I say, "where you from?"
If I was a white man, I'd be taking his job.
If I was a white man, I'd be taking his job.
If you can see me.
If you can see me.
If you mysteriously had $50 million
If you mysteriously had $50 million
If you promise to start wearing pants.
If you promise to start wearing pants.
If you're gonna come, I'll be there waitin'.
If you're gonna come, I'll be there waitin'.
In fact, just the other day,
In fact, just the other day,
In fueling the fire of my career,
In fueling the fire of my career,
In the background, Eddie Griffin is on television.
In the background, Eddie Griffin is on television.
In the same situation as you sometimes.
In the same situation as you sometimes.
In this month's cameltoe magazine.
In this month's cameltoe magazine.
Is because they was a racist?
Is because they was a racist?
Is everything okay over here?
Is everything okay over here?
Is that I got pretty hair, and I'm tired of that shit!
Is that I got pretty hair, and I'm tired of that shit!
Is willing to settle out of court.
Is willing to settle out of court.
It burns!
It burns!
It is not catfish, ****a.
It is not catfish, ****a.
It plays on that they're educated
It plays on that they're educated
It shows that you have a clear disdain for me and the system.
It shows that you have a clear disdain for me and the system.
It stinks.
It stinks.
It was crazy just my nuts.
It was crazy just my nuts.
It was funny as hell, and just ride with it.
It was funny as hell, and just ride with it.
It was just I'm sorry, man.
It was just I'm sorry, man.
It was torture. Straight torture, son.
It was torture. Straight torture, son.
It was uncomfortable, and I think that's the point of it.
It was uncomfortable, and I think that's the point of it.
It wasn't hard enough for you.
It wasn't hard enough for you.
It'll be painless, and you'll be rich.
It'll be painless, and you'll be rich.
It's he's living!
It's he's living!
It's $2 million.
It's $2 million.
It's a comedy show.
It's a comedy show.
It's a little painful for me, some tough times in my life,
It's a little painful for me, some tough times in my life,
It's all right, man.
It's all right, man.
It's all taken care of?
It's all taken care of?
It's almost like Eddie Griffin is in the room with them
It's almost like Eddie Griffin is in the room with them
It's as if you don't hear me.
It's as if you don't hear me.
It's been a very busy day in the news.
It's been a very busy day in the news.
It's done, baby.
It's done, baby.
It's funny that we can come together
It's funny that we can come together
It's got all the treats that you love from my show.
It's got all the treats that you love from my show.
It's happening in my home.
It's happening in my home.
It's leopard! Illegal leopard!
It's leopard! Illegal leopard!
It's light and crispy, yes.
It's light and crispy, yes.
It's like the "angry black guy."
It's like the "angry black guy."
It's lookin' that way.
It's lookin' that way.
It's made out of expensive chicken dinners
It's made out of expensive chicken dinners
It's not a bad stereotype.
It's not a bad stereotype.
It's not over yet. White people, you're not safe.
It's not over yet. White people, you're not safe.
It's not the black white thing, is it?
It's not the black white thing, is it?
It's over.
It's over.
It's powerful stuff.
It's powerful stuff.
It's pulpy.
It's pulpy.
It's reversible.
It's reversible.
It's supposed to draw attention to peoples' stereotypes
It's supposed to draw attention to peoples' stereotypes
It's those guys.
It's those guys.
Jerry had the nerve to tell me that I didn't have,
Jerry had the nerve to tell me that I didn't have,
Jerry Jacobs, casting agent extraordinaire.
Jerry Jacobs, casting agent extraordinaire.
Jew tang clan!
Jew tang clan!
Jingling and jangling.
Jingling and jangling.
Just be real with it, son.
Just be real with it, son.
Just be relaxed, easy.
Just be relaxed, easy.
Just do what I say.
Just do what I say.
Just exactly what happened with that $50 million check.
Just exactly what happened with that $50 million check.
Just get the fuck outta here! I'm eatin' soup!
Just get the fuck outta here! I'm eatin' soup!
Just got these leopard skin seat covers in.
Just got these leopard skin seat covers in.
Just hit her with the twist.
Just hit her with the twist.
Just I'm olu. I'm me.
Just I'm olu. I'm me.
Keep 'em closed.
Keep 'em closed.
Keep it real!
Keep it real!
Keep talkin', ****a, whatever!
Keep talkin', ****a, whatever!
Keep twisting, Phil, for God's sakes.
Keep twisting, Phil, for God's sakes.
Kept feeding me and feeding me and feeding me!
Kept feeding me and feeding me and feeding me!
Kiss my black ass, Jerry.
Kiss my black ass, Jerry.
Knock, knock.
Knock, knock.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Ladies and gentlemen,
Ladies and gentlemen,
Ladies and gentlemen,
Ladies and gentlemen,
Ladies and gentlemen,
Ladies and gentlemen, this is a 4 million year old egg.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is a 4 million year old egg.
Ladies and gentlemen...
Ladies and gentlemen...
Lala! Lala, yoshi. Yoshi, lala. Mtv.
Lala! Lala, yoshi. Yoshi, lala. Mtv.
Leopard!
Leopard!
Leopard.
Leopard.
Let me get a picture with you.
Let me get a picture with you.
Let me tell you something.
Let me tell you something.
Let's go to the amusement park.
Let's go to the amusement park.
Let's have a little arms race in the room.
Let's have a little arms race in the room.
Let's just say his lyrics were a little bit before they time.
Let's just say his lyrics were a little bit before they time.
Let's start the show.
Let's start the show.
Let's start the show.
Let's start the show.
Let's start the show.
Let's start the show.
Let's try it out.
Let's try it out.
Life is happening, ladies and gentlemen.
Life is happening, ladies and gentlemen.
Life.
Life.
Like a tiny incision, if you will.
Like a tiny incision, if you will.
Like I accept you, you fuckin' frankenstein,
Like I accept you, you fuckin' frankenstein,
Like, "******, where's the weed?"
Like, "******, where's the weed?"
Like, "sss..."
Like, "sss..."
Like, I have a friend, like, I have my and myself.
Like, I have a friend, like, I have my and myself.
Like, I think that he touched on four different races
Like, I think that he touched on four different races
Like, if I'm in the bedroom with my old lady,
Like, if I'm in the bedroom with my old lady,
Like, if they talk about the big butt jokes,
Like, if they talk about the big butt jokes,
Like, whenever he picks up the phone, like,
Like, whenever he picks up the phone, like,
Like, you know, he keeps it real.
Like, you know, he keeps it real.
Like, you know, you gonna be, like, real professional.
Like, you know, you gonna be, like, real professional.
Lil' jon in love...
Lil' jon in love...
Listen up!
Listen up!
Listen, you've been late every month since you got out.
Listen, you've been late every month since you got out.
Look at all that meat. It's superfluous.
Look at all that meat. It's superfluous.
Look at my chandelier.
Look at my chandelier.
Look, we gonna be right back with some more
Look, we gonna be right back with some more
Makes them feel more comfortable.
Makes them feel more comfortable.
Making people laugh.
Making people laugh.
Making some of these funny, racist jokes,
Making some of these funny, racist jokes,
Man, a lot of people didn't know, like,
Man, a lot of people didn't know, like,
Man, ooh whee.
Man, ooh whee.
Man, was that bitch wrong!
Man, was that bitch wrong!
Marla Gibbs?
Marla Gibbs?
Me and Charlie Murphy, because we've been under a lot of stress
Me and Charlie Murphy, because we've been under a lot of stress
Me voy de aqui!
Me voy de aqui!
Merchandising.
Merchandising.
Messed up his whole campaign with his mouth?
Messed up his whole campaign with his mouth?
Method man put a hanger on the stove
Method man put a hanger on the stove
Method man put a hanger on the stove
Method man put a hanger on the stove
Method man put a hanger on the stove and left it
Method man put a hanger on the stove and left it
Minority entrepreneurship few minorities
Minority entrepreneurship few minorities
Minority.
Minority.
Minority.
Minority.
Miss, I'm sorry, I don't say that anymore,
Miss, I'm sorry, I don't say that anymore,
Miss, please, I'm busy at work right now,
Miss, please, I'm busy at work right now,
Mmm mmm... p.B. And j.!
Mmm mmm... p.B. And j.!
Mmm, you wanna sandwich?
Mmm, you wanna sandwich?
Mmm, you want a sandwich?
Mmm, you want a sandwich?
Mom!
Mom!
Money...
Money...
Morning, fellas.
Morning, fellas.
Mtv puts celebrities in those houses for the day
Mtv puts celebrities in those houses for the day
Mummy, a judge ruled in your favor.
Mummy, a judge ruled in your favor.
My color shouldn't even be an issue.
My color shouldn't even be an issue.
My eyes! My Dickies!
My eyes! My Dickies!
My family's petty too.
My family's petty too.
My fault, sorry.
My fault, sorry.
My God, Phil, don't touch it!
My God, Phil, don't touch it!
My house is small, and it's not that baller.
My house is small, and it's not that baller.
My question is, how much do you have
My question is, how much do you have
My scissors!
My scissors!
My voice don't have quite the authority
My voice don't have quite the authority
N no mummies! I don't trust mummies!
N no mummies! I don't trust mummies!
Nah, man, it's cable.
Nah, man, it's cable.
Never thought I'd say this, but I'm embarrassed.
Never thought I'd say this, but I'm embarrassed.
New beginnings.
New beginnings.
News center two's own Jack championship is there.
News center two's own Jack championship is there.
Nice and flat.
Nice and flat.
Nice shoes.
Nice shoes.
****a, I thought you said your boss was a racist.
****a, I thought you said your boss was a racist.
****a, speak for yourself.
****a, speak for yourself.
****a, that's the sixth time this has happened this week.
****a, that's the sixth time this has happened this week.
****a, you a frankenstein!
****a, you a frankenstein!
******s.
******s.
No cup; It's not necessary.
No cup; It's not necessary.
No matter how good the show is.
No matter how good the show is.
No matter how responsible you are,
No matter how responsible you are,
No matter what I do, what I say...
No matter what I do, what I say...
No matter what method he does or puts out there,
No matter what method he does or puts out there,
No, he's at work.
No, he's at work.
No, I'm just saying, I thought it was funny.
No, I'm just saying, I thought it was funny.
No, like
No, like
No, no, watch me take it to the hole.
No, no, watch me take it to the hole.
No, really, you can tell me.
No, really, you can tell me.
No, thanks, I'm good.
No, thanks, I'm good.
No!
No!
No.
No.
Not a black man!
Not a black man!
Not a mercy.
Not a mercy.
Not as funny as that jacket is.
Not as funny as that jacket is.
Not even like a line.
Not even like a line.
Not long after you left here.
Not long after you left here.

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