Disenchantment (2018) - Season 2 Edit

A beloved king and father was gravely wounded,

A big, fat smirk on my face

A bigfoot and yeti?

A bullet.

A coin? Ow!

A confusing prank I pulled once.

A curse reversal, you say?

A gallant guzzler who never met a table he couldn't drink someone under.

A key piece of information about the Curse.

A king!

A little gold sea star.

A new village was built around these steam holes to harness this power,

A powerful Oona is more help to Bean in the future.

A real place, sir. Not some sojourn of your drunken dreams.

A shooting star! Did it work?

A sister was accused of being a witch and a brother burned her at the stake.

A toast to Prince Merkimer

A veritable sandwich of danger

A village called Dead Monksburg.

A what what what?

A whistle tells you when to eat?

A yo yo trick gone awry severed her head,

About me, in particular?

About the greatest thing that ever maybe didn't happen to me.

About the people in the streets who are dying of starvation?

Actually, I'm good

Actually, pretending to care about your feelings was exhausting

After killing one son and pig ifying the other?

After she died in The Battle of Falling Water,

Again, sire?

Ah, Beanie…

Ah, I've married worse.

Ah, jeez! Why'd I drink a gallon of water before I got in the coffin?

Ah, no such thing

Ah, nuts, my cigar went out. I didn't pack enough for the whole hour

Ah, okay, fine.

Ah, they're still here

Ah, yes, like sea turtle.

Ah, you're just jealous, old cat.

Ah!

Ah! At last. Come, have a drink, Tia.

Ah! Cut it out! Ouch!

Ah! The Crown. My favorite show.

Ahem. Princess Tiabeanie brings a proclamation from King Zøg.

All 37 minutes, sir?

All hail our only king here forever!

All I had to do was put a ring on it.

All I really know is that I need to focus on things that I can fix.

All right, but don't try any of that funny Ow!

All right, drop your knives.

All right, eager beaver

All right, I'll talk to you later

All right, jeez.

All right, knock off the self pity.

All right, let's go

All right, Luci, your turn.

All right, rummies.

All right, smart guy, I'm standing right here

All right, thank you

All right, uh, listen up. I expect to live in a manner

All right, you simple country folks.

All right, Zøg has stopped…

All right. Come on, we can go get some crackers?

All right. Shut up, everyone, quiet.

All rise!

All that dummy does is tell stale, wooden jokes that hurt people's feelings.

All the way down. To your destiny.

All these things ever see is a problem

All these things ever see is a problem.

All these years of living with a grunting, emotionally remote dad has paid off.

All washed up! Now to dry!

All we believe is that you just spewed a bunch of nonsense.

All we got left is this me flavored beer

All you gotta do is find the queen.

Also, happy birthday, Trudy in Blimpworks.

Also, I didn't say anything

Also, one of the ogres destroyed your painting. It wasn't me

Also, the drugs are in Missy's tacklebox.

Also, where are the drugs?

Although I'm your ruler and that makes me all superior or whatever,

Alva Gunderson?

Alva!

Am I the hero?

Amazingly, I've had the same dream myself, Merkimer

An alliance is what I'm offering, between magic and science.

An elf for my shelf.

An excellent spectacle, Your Majesty. You were a model of regal barbarism

And a pudding maker. I make wonderful pudding

And a side of green beans? [groans]

And all his horse porn.

And all of fair Bentwood, listen up

And all over the place and I figured it all out

And also with you, Prime Minister Odval. What can I do for you today?

And another for when to stop daydreaming.

And another for when to work, and another for when to take breaks,

And are lucky you did not inherit red, bushy hair from your father

And as for her two friends, throw them in the lava pit. Deep end

And as your queen, I'm ordering you to go.

And at a quarter a pop, you're very affordable.

And badass Bean is the Bean I wanna see right now

And be sure not to grab someone else's clothes on the way out, okay?

And Bean, you, too.

And beauty and love and risk and passion.

And Bunty only cleans on Tuesdays. Being king can drive you mad.

And by club rules, I demand you produce proof of your exploits.

And by we, I mean, mostly you,

And calls him The Incredible Shrinking Man.

And coming up next is our underground Fungus Forest.

And definitely don't look behind you.

And don't judge me. I don't have any walrus accompaniment, so…

And Elfo fell for a gal who was just a head

And even if I did, I couldn't say, only hint.

And everything to do with Dreamland's secret resources.

And finally, I promise never to use a fly swatter, even in anger,

And focus on what's most important, the reunion of mother and child

And for the first time ever, she's outta my league

And for this gift, we owe a tremendous debt of gratitude

And free thinkers and masturbators. Ugh

And here he comes now. My dad, your king, King Zøg

And I came back because I'll never learn

And I forgot to mention that they want to take my dad out now, too!

And I intend to prove it to you

And I long for those days

And I need you. Here! You can do this, Beanie

And I spend most of my days starin' at Elfo!

And I still have a sweet, pint sized stalker who I love, sure.

And I taught kindergarten in Hell for 9,000 years

And I thought he was our friend. Ow!

And I toss him a sausage every ten miles if he runs fast enough.

And I want my knife back

And I was wondering if, um, you wanted to go with me, and

And I will get them.

And I, you

And I, you.

And I'll be right by your side

And I'm gonna die alone

And I'm gonna find out who.

And I'm not letting you go this time

And I'm overdosin'!

And I'm pointing this big knife at what I think is your face.

And I'm still thirsty!

And if he tries to leave,

And if I do, will he still be able to run the kingdom?

And if you forget, you get your head chopped off!

And if you get a chance, can you bring me my blue hairbrush?

And if you've got any colonies or territories

And in this spirit, I would also like to pardon the following.

And is afraid it says his family is cursed

And its name is mental illness and the stigma that accompanies it.

And last but not least or she'd kill me,

And laugh and laugh.

And loneliness.

And makes everything from blimps to buses to banjos

And maybe a sandwich at the deli can be named after Elfo and Luci

And maybe some cannons, arrows, plus shields and swords.

And maybe some tater tots?

And murder with no consequences?

And my crown doesn't even fit.

And my heart. And now, those are empty

And my low self esteem

And my water nozzle's not broken, you just haven't refilled the bottle!

And never eat at the strip clubs.

And New Mommy and New Daddy "need a break" from me

And no invading my dreams this time

And no longer smelled like weird porridge.

And no matter what people say, sire, I know you're a good man

And none of his good ones.

And not have you panic, because it's really bad news…

And now that we are finally reunited as queen and princess,

And now to achieve our ultimate goal,

And now you're wearing your crown backwards,

And now, feast your eyes on the comely Mora,

And now, I have to kill you.

And now, I just wanna lie down.

And now, it's time for the final shaddup.

And now, Sagatha, your vows

And now, that nutjob is…

And now, the velvet curtain parts to reveal Edith,

And Old Daddy, you're back home.

And outside this castle who want my dad dead,

And painful

And Porky.

And remember, Derek,

And saviors save people from things like scary robots!

And she came here to tell you that herself.

And she has a super annoying voice. Wait, so do I. Oh, my God

And she tried to shoot me! And she did shoot Turbish.

And some, like… [smacks lips] baba ghanoush

And someday, a mermaid will set fins on the Moon.

And that bright pulsing dot right in the middle?

And that is?

And that woman I'm looking for?

And the Archdruidess? And my crown? Something's goin' on

And the Archdruidess? How does she figure in all this?

And the kingdom is totally unprotected.

And the next thing you know, they're walking around, no harm, no foul

And the old man had a candy cane!

And the queen can no longer associate with those who are beneath her.

And the Secret Society is responsible for killing my Uncle Yøg.

And the way Zøg was tortured,

And then another gallon while I was in the coffin?

And then back to the bottom.

And then happier. And then sadder

And then I chopped it into tiny, little pieces and I burned it.

And then I forgot it.

And then I realized it was just your mama's face.

And then that, right there, is a constellation called the Big Flipper.

And then there's the sweet kittycats.

And then went straight to the top.

And then you'll be all alone, with only me behind you

And then, it all ends in rejection and agony

And there I was, minding my own business,

And there, in the middle of the jungle,

And these days, there is a modern way to get to the truth

And they never end well.

And they'll have to be named "Gordon" as well

And this is my first day on the job.

And this is where I hide

And this one time, Elfo got super weird when we were high

And those aren't tunneling thighs, dear

And to believe in you just like you believe in me.

And to make those tiny umbrellas you put in fancy drinks.

And together, we can reinvent the world!

And tragedy and heartbreak.

And we all talk about it, and it's never gonna happen.

And we will split up and follow them. But remember

And we… Why are you all nervous?

And we'll figure out how to bust this conspiracy

And we'll never unsee it.

And we're both screwed up royal kids, searching for ourselves.

And we're on a diplomatic mission of great secrecy and importance.

And what if I find my other boot?

And what shall be your first words

And what're those ball chain y things called?

And when a friend might want to break some unfortunate news to you,

And when it's time to do the goddamn dishes!

And when you meet this gal, don't let her go.

And when you pushed me into battle, I went

And who can resist the sweet allure of poisoned cake?

And why is everyone so casual about the fact

And why should we trust you? Dude, you tried to kill us multiple times.

And without every necessary element, our plan is doomed.

And yet, somehow, gave her incredible powers of prognostication

And you know me, I love zydeco.

And you oughta see this guy's fantasies!

And you see those dots? They're actually big dots.

And you went into a drunken rage and you gouged my eyeball out?

And you're taller than I imagined

And your ass hanging out is a definite deal breaker

And, like, I maybe, kinda, maybe kissed him.

And, like, kissed, and like… And, like, touched stuff,

And, like, moved around, and, like, talked.

And, Porky, I expect better behavior from you next time.

And, uh, show me the way up?

And… [shudders]

Another cave!

Another coin. Ow!

Another time, he got mad at me for making him stand in the garden

Any operating instructions or ominous warnings?

Anyone here?

Anyone still wanna hear it?

Anyone who falls in love with me meets a horrible fate.

Anything for a fellow LGS member, what what

Anything for our saviors!

Anything is possible

Anyway, apparently, I'm not film friendly or… friendly.

Anyway, check this out.

Anyway, I guess it's better to be respected

Anyway, I thought you should know

Anyway, I've got to talk to my dad.

Anyway, okay, listen. I know things look pretty bad right now.

Approve what?

Archdruidess, we have a problem

Archdruidess, we have a problem.

Are not allowed at these council meetings.

Are the new members ready to carry out the task?

Are we even listening to the same door?

Are we on the right path?

Are you all right? Or are?

Are you chazzin' me? Seriously, are you freakin' chazzin' me?

Are you finished?

Are you finished? Because we're due to be slaughtered.

Are you gonna wipe your drool and help me or not?

Are you kidding? I'm so out of his league!

Are you okay, Elfo?

Are you okay? You look so much sadder than your poster.

Are you ready? You ready? Okay. You signed your will, right? Good. Go.

Are you sure you can climb down the ladder with your fins and such?

Are you sure you're okay?

Aren't boots supposed to bend at the knee? This is never gonna work!

Aren't you gonna show me in?

Argh! Don't sneak up on me like that. What do you got to report?

As long as the boy doesn't start asking impertinent questions

As Queen Tiabeanie the First, Ruler of the Glorious Dreamland Empire?

As the palace wizard,

As you may know, I'm something of a swine vivant

As your new royal assassin,

As your queen, I command you

Ask Pendergast

At least Elfo is out there having fun.

At least I have this one card to remember you by

At least I know how to complete something, unlike my daughter,

At least I'm in a coffin, God damn it

At least we found the gun

At least you have a fist. I don't have a body at all.

At least, I think that that's hair

At least, not that I know of

At midnight, I must go to the basement and enter the screen door.

At midnight, you'll come below the castle for a special surprise.

At my face, Bean. I'm Alva. This is the real me.

At the sound of the maracas, let the orgy begin.

Attendance is mandatory,

Aw

Aw, come here, you fat ass lunatic.

Aw, come on! What's goin' on?

Aw, he spelled it "yer."

Aw, I'm done razzin' ya, ya bucktoothed gin junkie

Aw, it's just a tender little mouse

Aw!

Aw! Bean reserved a seat for me.

Aw. Thanks for not saying "brave little guy."

Aw. You sound just like my friends back home.

Bad news is this is very bad news.

Bang it down tight. I'm only gonna be in here like an hour

Be a good queenie, Beanie.

Be careful! Our lunch break's almost over.

Be warned, he's not one of the cute ones.

Bean and Dad are just really emotionally draining.

Bean gaining the crown

Bean is a witch.

Bean is alive, too…

Bean is going to be queen.

Bean, at least give me my crown. It really doesn't suit you

Bean, come back. Please, I'm paying a lot for this ad.

Bean, come back. Please, I'm paying a lot for this ad.

Bean, death is not good option. I had to move on with my life.

Bean, don't do this to me

Bean, don't do this. I have a family. My people need me.

Bean, don't toot

Bean, I love your new look

Bean, I take care of crazy Zøggy. You take care of crazy kingdom.

Bean, I tried to get help, but nobody wanted to.

Bean, I wanted to meet you so much.

Bean, I'm speaking to you now through Boat a Vision,

Bean, I've had a lot of time to think since our adventure in Cremorrah,

Bean, I've missed you so much

Bean, I've never met anyone as bold or clever as you,

Bean, look out!

Bean, meet Mora. Mora, Bean

Bean, who have you pissed off this time?

Bean, you have to be careful. We know what this woman's capable of

Bean, you're the one in charge.

Bean!

Bean? Oona?

Bean's an idiot?

Bean's dead. Daddy's gonna die.

Bean's still alive! I got somethin' to live for!

Beanie, you're back! How was the health spa?

Beat it, peewee. The kiddie rides are that way.

Beatin' your comrades with a bar of soap in a sock,

Beats me. We're in a cave.

Because he died serving your father

Because he is losing his mind.

Because I'm "extremely grating."

Because I'm your savior. That's it.

Because that's just not in the cards for you."

Because you didn't specifically mention me.

Because, holy cow, being in charge is stressful.

Before anyone, even other elves, find out

Before the curse is finally lifted

Before Zøg, I was in love with Yøg.

Behold the glorious beauty of mining pit number three.

Being on the throne's a huge, horrible responsibility.

Believe it or not,

Believe it or not, that's the bridegroom!

Believe me, I know, 'cause I've been to Hell and back.

Besides Bentwood. Or Dankmire. Or Steamland.

Besides, it's mandatory, right? She'll have to be there.

Betty, send in the Archdruidess immediately.

Between Tiabeanie's ancestors and their foes

Biding my time until the moment I could deploy the art you've best schooled me in.

Big Jo? I thought he was dead. He looks like a cadaver.

Big Jo.

Big savings ahead!

Bill?

Bill? Bill?

Boat? You mean…

Boing.

Both of us failed. Then they locked me in here

Bow chicka wow wow!

Bow lower.

Boy, this went a completely different way in my head.

Boys, this is serious.

Braids hurt my brain.

Bravo, Bean

Bullfrogs are green, tree frogs are green, pond frogs are green. [chuckles]

Bup, bup, bup. Members only. Sorry, madam.

But because I knew you'd be right there fighting behind me

But deep down, you feel lonesome and inadequate

But didn't touch these succulent pigs?

But do it, 'cause all the other major religions do it,

But don't get too close, Derek. Death is contagious

But down at the pub, she was stealin' mugs.

But gender is a construct. You guys have to listen.

But guess what? We never even got back together,

But he is a bigger target

But I actually have one that was sent to destroy my life.

But I also discovered the most important thing in life.

But I also lost five jerks, so it balanced out.

But I always had you to look up to

But I am the one spinning the flail.

But I can get us out of this.

But I can protect you. All of you.

But I can't do this without you!

But I can't seem to remember how to find the stairs

But I can't shake the feeling that life is meaningless

But I definitely turned you into one.

But I did enjoy the show. You handled yourself well.

But I don't like you, darling

But I got my hands full with your sister.

But I know that you can get better

But I must get back to the queen before she suspects something.

But I need you and Luci to raise an army immediately.

But I now realize she couldn't have without the gun

But I only like gratification when it's instant.

But I refuse to believe he would do this to us.

But I should have poisoned you instead, because all you do is mess things up

But I think it's best if you think of me as your slutty grandma.

But I'll toast to you not trying to screw that crown on my head

But I've never ever ever not had you before.

But if I'm gonna do this, I gotta do it right.

But if you could just keep trying, I know you can get better.

But if you want saving,

But is the word "pretty" okay?

But it is real. And I've really been there.

But it just… [yells] makes me more annoying!

But it sure ain't the Luci Special.

But it was actually a spoon that you threw so hard, at such a velocity,

But it's been a lonely dream

But it's exactly how I feel inside, so it makes sense

But it's not the most fulfilling.

But it's so dreadfully gloomy down here

But listen, there are people inside

But maybe I stick around until you are better?

But miraculously recovered.

But my dad has had kind of a rough few years.

But now all my dreams are dead

But now I think it means something.

But now is the time to put the future aside and make up for the past

But now they're alive and completely raw and ungrilled

But now, honestly, I don't care

But now, I can't even hold a spoon. I'm afraid of 'em now

But obviously there's nothing wrong with that.

But Odval here thinks he's about to die on his own

But often, the craziest thoughts are the most true, ya nutloaf!

But right now, he can't even change himself.

But right now, I gotta get you outta here fast

But science, or "stience," as you call it,

But she's happy to be here

But tempting fate like this? It's risky.

But that was once.

But that's kinda what I thought about you anyway,

But that's not something I can do.

But the absolute most insane thing of all?

But the Orb also gives life to Zandoro, my elf companion

But then I got all mixed up. I think she's onto me

But then one day, splash! It was over.

But then they could set up a socialist utopia

But they're super easy to tip over. And Steamland also has one of my boots.

But this is impossible

But this is impossible. You were transposed into a pig.

But we ain't got no barrel. We traded it for these crates

But we might not have a future if you leave now.

But we must do something about the king

But we shall see.

But what about your glass slippers, ma'am?

But what if I helped you find out?

But where are King Lorenzo and Queen Bunny?

But who will take care of the kingdom?

But who'd want to attack Dreamland?

But you are king. I beg of you on behalf of all the deviants of Dreamland

But you escaped with the greatest treasure of all.

But you know what? I'm still a good friend 'cause I went to Hell for him and got him!

But you know your way around. You could help me find her.

But you took that away from me.

But you're the monster now… I mean, the queen.

But you've come back to Mermaid Island to resume the role you were born to play.

But, like, a couple years back, I fell deeply in love.

But, like, I'm not in love with. There's a difference, you know?

But, uh, I just wanted to say, I never knew my father

By order of my dad, Dreamland must prepare for an attack.

By the way, you were right about the mayonnaise.

Bye, I'm on break

Bye, Mora

Bye, Pendergast

Calling all alkies! Join the Dreamland army.

Calling me a worm offends my eel heritage

Calm down, Princess. Royalty is meaningless in Steamland.

Can harness that magic into a force for good

Can I hold your hand?

Can we just kiss?

Can you read it?

Care for a bowl of cereal?

Careful, Bean. What Dreamland need right now is steady hand.

Careful. You've gone from non believer to fate junkie.

Caresso, stop panting

Causes paralysis so you can tell people off before their demise

Cave juice

Ceremony's over

Chalk one up for ignorance!

Chums, I've had the journey of a lifetime.

Classic Oona

Closer

Closer, then

Cloyd and Becky told me Zøg was evil and had to be stopped

Come back here, kitty, and take a cat nap with me

Come back here, you cowards! They're our allies!

Come on in. Water's nice and warm.

Come on, "Dinner Date."

Come on, Bean

Come on, Bean! This is gold!

Come on, Bean. I want to show you an amazing place you haven't been before.

Come on, Beanie, over here!

Come on, boy, giddy up. Thanks, Malfus!

Come on, deal the cards.

Come on, guys, we gotta find that gun fast.

Come on, let's go slit their fat, dumb necks right now

Come on, what's wrong? Talk to me.

Come on!

Come on! No more beating around bush!

Come right in, Your Majesty, and feast your eyes.

Come to the throne room immediately and arrest the princess and her boy toys.

Come, let us walk among our adoring subjects

Congratulations. Just in time for the morning shift

Consecrating our desires without fear of reprisal or castigation

Consider me schooled

Continuing…

Cool.

Cool. Where's the Moon now?

Could it be? [exclaims]

Could Tiabeanie actually be a witch?

Crazy girl!

Curse you! And you, too! A knuckle sandwich to all of you!

Dad saw it all. We drove him crazy

Dad, are you gonna be okay? I gotta go now.

Dad, are you okay?

Dad, come on, say something

Dad, I brought you a little midnight snack.

Dad, I can't… I can't do it on my own

Dad, it's 3:00 a.m. and you're not in your bed.

Dad, this ain't good.

Dad, what are you talking about?

Dad, what'd you do with Freckles?

Dad, what's wrong with you?

Dad, you're talking again! Let's go home and celebrate!

Dad? Dad, where are you?

Dag? Dagmar, is that you?

Dagmar and I are a teeny, kinda, sorta similar.

Dagmar? What are you doing in Hell? And other Dagmar, same question

Damn it! Dad!

Damn! You are not mellowing with age

Dankmire, Heaven, Mermaid Island, yeah, even the Lost City of Cremorrah.

Darling, nothing's keeping you

Dearly beloved and the accursed, we are gathered here today to celebrate

Decapitation isn't about me. It's about you. Those were your cards

Deception, Deliciousness, Distress…"

Depending upon who looks best in it

Derek and Oona. I'm gonna miss her.

Derek has found a special book

Derek loves being confined in his room. He even locks himself in

Derek, honey, you have some special visitors.

Derek, I didn't see you there

Derek, we're gonna teach you the ways of the world.

Derek? What have you got there?

Derek. Oh! And new angry fairy girl I like.

Did I ever tell you about the big skillet?

Did that book I ordered come in?

Did we just get dumped?

Did you get chazzed? I did. [babbles]

Did you really bury her father alive and shoot at her?

Dirty dogs always runnin' around lookin' for action,

Disputes will be resolved by pancake eating contests

Do not bring Turbish.

Do they have a crown for best friends?

Do what you will to Porky, but he will never talk.

Do what? Dad, no, please don't ask me this

Do you know how hard it is to pleasure oneself with hooves?

Do you know what this means?

Do you like travel, exercise, fascism,

Do you make things up as you go along? Because that's what it felt like.

Do you think my eyes and bowels will stop spinning eventually?

Do you think she knows about the royal curse?

Don't be afraid

Don't be drama queen. That is my job. Flourish.

Don't be mad.

Don't bother, Bean

Don't celebrate yet. We have a problem

Don't die in there, Bean. I'm not stable enough for grief right now

Don't do it!

Don't do that.

Don't even think about it.

Don't ever walk barefoot around here.

Don't get too close. Yeah, I totally got it down! [exclaims]

Don't make me look at your eye no more.

Don't make me talk to Elfo. [continues muttering]

Don't matter to me which what way you are

Don't open the doors which have bloodshot eyes staring back at you

Don't play coy with me. You know what that alliance was about.

Don't push those buttons. It won't do any good.

Don't say, "Wink, wink." Just wink.

Don't spoil it, Craig.

Don't take this the wrong way, but shut up, Elfo.

Don't talk to Porky that way. He's sensitive.

Don't we just look absolutely bewitching in our dress?

Don't worry, you won't remember a thing

Don't you have a mob to join?

Don't you know you can't trust anyone but yourself?

Don't you see? He talks through me. But it ain't free.

Doubtful. She's usually in too much of an alcoholic haze to really notice

Down to the bone, sir. Impressive. You are a true warrior

Down, down, down.

Drag her away.

Dreamland is the long lost home of the elves!

Dreamland needs a large amount of money, right away,

Dreamland!

Dreamland.

Drugs.

Duck? Where? [grunts]

Dummy. Dummy. [honks]

Dying, I'm gonna go with it.

Each of us has a specialty.

Edith

Edith

Edith. [chuckles]

Eh, potato, potahto. We forage 'em both.

Elevator Boy.

Elfo and Luci are all I have, and that is not a deep bench.

Elfo not there. And that no Fun Maze

Elfo scared off all the new recruits last night

Elfo went to Heaven, but I ended up going to Hell to rescue him.

Elfo, don't wander off. We're outta here in 30 seconds.

Elfo, don't!

Elfo, flick him another one.

Elfo, is that true?

Elfo, Luci, stop!

Elfo, never say "loneliness" in a freak show

Elfo, no!

Elfo, punch his kidneys. Elfo! Spit out that frosting and get over here.

Elfo, quit clowning around

Elfo, scoot away.

Elfo, what are you doing? Pay attention!

Elfo, where are you?

Elfo, you start on the top floor. Luci, you start on the bottom.

Elfo!

Elfo! Before you go, I've never had ladder sex before.

Elfo! Slow down!

Elfo? Are you okay down there?

Elfo's in some kind of mood.

Elfo's lost his mind.

Elfo's more of a mother to me than you!

Elfwood.

End of the pier and keep walkin'.

Enter the circle.

Escalator Girl misses you. She asked if you were coming.

Even demons think you're a dick.

Even lower.

Even more important than a good defense is a good offense.

Even you know I'm already gone, Beanie

Every goddamn time!

Every last one

Every single time, it's cake with you. It's not even good cake.

Every tattoo tells a tale

Every time I jab him, he squeals.

Every time I said, "Hi, I'm Elfo," I was crying on the inside.

Every time Zøg honks,

Everybody, all together now. "Hi, I'm Elfo

Everything in sight with those teeth

Evil eyes, holier than thou attitude, always scheming.

Ew, g****.

Ew, no, thank you.

Except for Elfo.

Except for the one time it solved all that stuff.

Except for… [clears throat]

Excuse me while I dispose of this trash.

Excuse me, but is anyone else bothered by the rules of this world?

Exorcising other people's demons, but never my own.

Extra slowly. Wait [gasps]

Face it, Bean, neither one of us is destined to lead.

Face it. You're the one running the kingdom.

Fairies, castles, demons, the works

False bottom in the bathtub where Bean makes her bathtub gin

False bottom in the sofa where Bean makes her sofa gin

Fantastic. We're going to live, everyone.

Faster, before he gives it all away!

Father, I brought you your favorite meal, food!

Fellow Dreamlanders, our difficult period has passed.

Fifth, if you count Elfo's xylophone recital

Finally. Someone gets it

Find Princess Tiabeanie and bring her back, alive

Find the queen, win the dough. Where she stops, nobody knows

Fine, I crown thee Queen of Lies

First name, "Sam." Last name, "Buca."

First rain, now someone's a knockin'?

Foes? Who were they? And what of Bean? Is she mentioned?

Follow the tunnel to Zøg's bedchamber

Fooling foolish fools is so satisfying

For a dying man, he's making a lot of noise

For an incoming cloud of green smoke and we have a question

For bored rich people, aren't you?

For clues to the true meaning of the Curse.

For free?

For God's sake, enough chitter chatter.

For me. And for me.

For who I am, not what I am, right?

For your own safety, keep your arms and legs inside the wagon at all times.

Forget it.

Former Queen of Dreamland, now Pirate Queen of the Seventeen Seas,

Four, only date someone who actually likes ya.

Freak

Freak

Free beer at the pub, for as long as my allowance lasts.

Free drinks in the courtyard, ya boozebags!

Freight elevator. It's one of my favorite tricks.

Friends, enemies, friends with benefits,

From a Squalid Squirrel cartoon.

From now on, call me Freckles.

From the moment you hosed me off, I have been watching you.

From the safety of my secret royal hideaway

From what I've heard, I'm both obnoxious and amazing

Full disclosure, I am standing on two stools

Full disclosure, it did get pretty hot, though.

Full moon.

Fun fact, people thought it was a fork you threw,

Fun times

Furthermore, my father said, and I quote…

Gah! I kneel before thee, my ghost king!

Gee, Bean, you must really like mermaids

Get away from me. I told you I was the real Dagmar.

Get lost, you deadbeat! See you in church!

Get outta here

Get outta here, ya smug little bastards

Get outta here!

Get outta here.

Get people to do something they don't wanna do?

Get the hell in there. Safe and sound

Get the hell outta here!

Get the nets, idiots!

Get your disgusting paws off me

Giddy up, horsey!

Girls, girls, girls, this is a classy affair.

Give me a week or two

Give me that

Give me that.

Give us Elfo and we leave rest of you alone

Give us the one you call Elfo.

Go ahead. I don't need you. I don't need nobody.

Go and prepare the escape wagon!

Go home, and no one tries to kill you

Go on, little buddy

Go sit in a corner.

Go wait in your churchy throne like a good little ruler

Go walk with Yugo. I gotta figure this out

Go!

Go!

God damn it

God, I feel so naive.

God, why is Mom so obsessed with me?

Good night

Good night, Dad.

Good night, dear. Yugo will get you ready for bed

Good show.

Good thing you brought a stronger friend

Good thing, 'cause we didn't either

Good to know the kingdom is still in safe hands

Good, good.

Good, I'm not really in the mood for Laughing Horse

Good.

Good.

Good. Let me remind all of you

Goodbye, Beanie. Goodbye, Derek

Goodbye, Bentwood. Goodbye forever.

Goodbye, crazy girl.

Goodbye, Derek. I love you. Don't follow me.

Goodbye, Dreamland. Sorry I was so loud

Goodbye, Edith

Goodbye, Elfo

Goodbye, Vip…

Googly eyed clamshell? Edge of the World Fudge? Gum?

Gordy

Gordy Stewson was simply my cover to meet you.

Gordy Stewson, happy worker.

Gordy, I'm not some innocent girl from a farmy place

Gordy?

Gordy?

Got it

Got it. Okay. Glad we cleared that up

Granted

Great

Great idea. We'll start with Bunty

Great sandwiches, by the way.

Great speech

Great! Where is your secret royal hideaway?

Greetings, Darrell. Blessings on your hat and the head that fills it.

Greetings! I have something important to say.

Guards who live in this tube,

Guards, let us out this instant.

Guess you ain't king of the crates no more, huh?

Guys, I don't know what Scruffles the Cat is up to here,

Guys. Guys! Pull me up.

Ha!

Ha! That's what you get for believing in love.

Halt! Why goes there?

Hand signal, eh?

Harder.

Has been solved.

Has thrown a Turbish sized monkey wrench into the works.

Have a guy with a thing.

Have you ever sold a cup?

Haven't you ever seen an enchanted broom before?

He abandoned me, like everyone eventually does.

He can't handle what I got. It's incurable.

He comes with a lily pad arse glove

He does seem remorseful. Maybe he's telling the truth.

He just meant, it'd be better if we had a man to lead us.

He knows everything

He looks like someone who just came of age, he does.

He looks so different with his head sliced off

He must be restrained and put away somewhere.

He shot him and then he chopped his head off!

He should be dead ten times over

He slapped me on the bum bum.

He switched your pig son Merkimer back into his human body Merkimer

He takes one step closer to total insanity.

He was a talking squirrel. He got run over by a wheelbarrow

He was buried alive and he didn't take it too well.

He was buried alive in a pine box. That's torture!

He was told his loving daughter was burnt at the stake.

He went thataway.

He's a biter

He's a very naughty boy, but he's my favorite.

He's been known to eat whole cushions in his sleep.

He's either fast asleep or sitting very still in a quiet rage.

He's going off scroll!

He's just gone from nuts to screwy

He's not a child laborer.

He's not a man, either

He's practically my son, you know,

He's remarkably speedy for such a beachball of a boy.

He's right here

He's the last member left in the family lineage

Hell is so fast!

Hell yes.

Hello, Bean.

Hello, Bean. Did you miss me?

Hello, darlings!

Hello, Henry. I am Odval

Hello, it is I, Zandoro

Hello, there! You sound like someone I know.

Hello?

Help, help, help.

Help! Tell that moon to stop followin' me!

Hennessy, Watkins, Yonji, get in here!

Her heart.

Her thorax

Here

Here

Here are the edicts, Your Majesty. Remember to use your outside voice.

Here we are, my boy. Go in, that's right

Here, drink this coffee. It's been boiling for hours.

Here, I have something for you

Here, I'll turn down the volume.

Here.

Here. Stole 'em from Odval.

Here's a halberd

Here's the one I had them use to get the music box back into your bedroom

Here's the one that goes straight to Dad's room

Here's the plan, Big Jo.

Here's to hoping you aren't a psycho, too.

Here's your usual.

Herman, you're leaning out the window again.

Hey, ain't you a king or somethin'?

Hey, Bean, can I ask you a serious question?

Hey, Bean!

Hey, Bug Eyes, how you like this moon?

Hey, couldn't you take a less bumpy road?

Hey, Derek, down here.

Hey, Detective Dumbass, have you checked his locker?

Hey, do you guys think I should wean my dad off his emotional support dummy?

Hey, don't I know you?

Hey, don't talk to her like that, you big, fat phony!

Hey, Elfo, get up here. Mora's gonna swim us back to Dreamland.

Hey, everybody stop worrying.

Hey, girl.

Hey, guys! Did you see my dad?

Hey, hey! Psst, psst. Down here. Cons are all about confidence

Hey, how's it goin'? [chuckles]

Hey, I'm makin' sandwiches here!

Hey, it's the guy who always loses.

Hey, look. This thing is hollow.

Hey, Mertz, did we forget something?

Hey, mister, your hat is ugly!

Hey, Mora

Hey, Oona, hey!

Hey, Oona, who do you think I should punch first?

Hey, Pendergast, it's gettin' stuffy in here.

Hey, pipe down, will ya?

Hey, Rulo, find anything neat?

Hey, Snarla? Can I ask you somethin'?

Hey, sorry for how things turned out. But thanks for saving me.

Hey, Stan, you seen Pendergast's head lately?

Hey, there

Hey, they said this was don't chazz, don't tell!

Hey, what happened?

Hey, what is wrong with your father? I ask because

Hey, what, you tryin' to make a jerk out of me?

Hey, what's Derek doin' down there with Odval, huh?

Hey, what's that light ahead?

Hey, what's this?

Hey, where's my kitty cat? Have you seen him?

Hey, yeah, uh, human here

Hey, yeah! I'll just put on the ol' pathetic, single princess act.

Hey, you did do those voices for the Squalid Squirrel cartoons.

Hey!

Hey!

Hey! [blabbers]

Hey! I am proud.

Hey! I don't hear any coins droppin'

Hey! I've been to Hell

Hey! Wedding's cancelled.

Hey. They left before I could finish.

Hi

Hi, Dad, I brought you some dinner.

Hi, Dad. Please don't run away.

Hi, Edith.

Hi, I'm Corporal Elfo.

Hi, I'm the head of Pendergast.

Hi, I'm Trixy

Hi, Pendergast

Hi, there, Trixy. The name's O. Elf o

Hi, you're under arrest.

Hide under my bed.

Him stab eyeball. Hurt feelings.

Hiya, Bean!

Hiya, Princess!

Hmm

Hmm

Hmm

Hmm

Hmm, how many of those snack treats you got?

Hmm, there's only one way to find out who's really in control.

Hmm!

Hmm?

Hmm? Huh?

Hmm.

Hmm. These are getting pretty arbitrary. Maybe Merkimer was right

Hmm…

Hmm…

Hmm…

Hold on a moment. What's that sound?

Hold on, the guy you were talking about before was my uncle?

Hold your breath. You don't wanna be breathing in spores.

How 'bout a little song to lighten the mood? Any requests?

How about a hand here, Bean? Bean?

How can we be sure?

How come you never told me you're a princess, too?

How dare you? Also, I have no idea what you're even talking about

How did she know? [groans]

How did you get down here?

How did you get the gun?

How different can a ship ship be from an airship ship?

How do you wanna die? Slowly or extra slowly?

How is it that nobody can hear me?

How ya doin'?

How you like that?

How'd you like a very fast elf?

How's a flimsy piece of wood gonna hold back the ogres?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh? That's enough

Huh? What's that?

Huh? Who said that? Who wanna know how I'm feelin'?

Huh. So that's what happened to Voop.

Hurry up and get into bed

Hurry, Elfo. Get through the icing.

Hurry, we must re stack these skulls

Huzzah!

I ain't goin' back through there! Oh!

I ain't no ghost, Pendergast. I ain't even dyin' no more

I ain't talkin' to you. I'm talkin' to the head

I also kept the accessories.

I always thought you'd be dead in a ditch by now.

I always wanted to get lost in a labyrinth.

I am a royal suck up, damn it!

I am now, fatso. Call me, uh… Scruffles.

I am pretty good with a deep fryer, but it's not worth it.

I am so confused right now

I am, sir!

I and my fellow scallywags find it increasingly hard

I beg you, do not respond

I believe anything and I'm not an idiot.

I believed that?

I better not finish reading it or I'll get too frightened

I bring good old fashioned psychological torture to the party, okay?

I brought something to help you escape. It's inside the cake, ding dong.

I call her "Missy" for short.

I called you here so you could help us out.

I came to apologize.

I can arrange for Elfo to fall down a flight of stairs

I can even soliloquize, Princess Tiabeanie.

I can hear someone eating. Yeah

I can play the harmonica, if you hold it up to my mouth and move it

I can pretend I'm in a barrel

I can see colors and hear sounds!

I can swim home… once I… catch my breath

I can't barely honk no more

I can't believe I killed my big sister

I can't believe I'm forced to sit in the back

I can't blame 'em.

I can't hear you. I have a hammer in my hand. [grunts]

I can't tell what's broken.

I collect them when I have the chance.

I could fetch some of me children.

I defeated your Portal of Many Rotations

I did mean that

I did not ask you to leave a trail of death and destruction.

I didn't

I didn't even know what the word "friend" meant before I met you two.

I didn't even want a child

I didn't get an answer on that best friend crown.

I didn't know if you wanted to go with me.

I didn't see it.

I didn't… I tried to help him.

I do not have fleas, you red haired son of a bitch

I don't belong in the castle. I don't belong with the common folk

I don't deserve your praise

I don't even know if Dad is alive and kicking or dead and buried

I don't feel anything.

I don't have a door! Get out of my room! I wanna go live with Mom!

I don't have all night!

I don't have time for muttering. Hand me a murder stick

I don't know

I don't know how much longer I can take this. I'm gonna die.

I don't know how this can get any more degrading

I don't know how to handle it

I don't know if Odval or Purple Mommy would approve

I don't know what you're trying to pull, but I've been humiliated enough.

I don't know where it all went wrong, but from the moment you were born,

I don't know where the gun is.

I don't know who to disobey

I don't know why you always bring out the good half in me, Bean.

I don't know, he still looks kinda evil to me.

I don't know, I love this boot. We've been through a lot together.

I don't know. Look in the back

I don't like that sound no more. I used to but now I don't

I don't like you, either. You're lucky you're even in show business.

I don't see how. We don't even know if Dad recovered from his bullet wound

I don't think so

I don't think so. I ain't never been tossed in a drunk tank.

I don't think they get lots of elves around here

I don't think they get lots of giant mouse teeth, either

I don't wanna mess it up by opening my big mouth.

I don't want to, but okay.

I dreamed of this moment for so long, but I'm more worried than validated

I drew blood from the visiting elf

I drop down for stepmother crazy daughter talk, okay?

I feel like I know each and every one of you

I feel like we should workshop this before making any firm decisions.

I feel really optimistic about the oncoming bloodbath.

I feel so stupid. I was swimming around, being like,

I felt even more naked than I was.

I flunked out because I was so overworked.

I forgive you

I found a giant piece of soggy driftwood, dragged it up onto the beach.

I gave her a hard time, but she was the light of my life

I gave you my heart and you stomped on it!

I gave you my number, but you never called

I get it, you have perfect teeth

I get it, you're scared. I'm scared, too.

I get so much of that from my friend, Bean.

I give you a place to sleep. I give you unlimited cold hot dogs.

I give you legitimacy.

I got a lot of cat questions.

I got a lot of experience with relationships coming to a grinding halt

I got a nice thing going.

I got no reason to live

I got over my love by getting under your dad.

I got Pendergast to look after me. Maybe we'll go bowling.

I gotta drop down quietly.

I gotta figure out how to escape on my own

I guess Elfo's always gonna be my little man of mystery.

I guess it's time to finally let you go.

I had a love filled fantasy hallucination with a mermaid

I had a whole passionate speech ready to go.

I had no idea Bean would be so unforgiving.

I had one here a minute ago

I had the Archdruidess lure you here. I even gave her an expense account,

I had to tell poor Zøggy you were somewhere safe

I had to test you to see what you were like.

I hate you, Dad

I have a council meeting. Did you finish those budgetary amendments?

I have a machete.

I have a severe allergy to hay, and manure,

I have a thing with a guy.

I have an idea.

I have been looking after him for weeks, and now it's your turn

I have done, like, so much with so many people,

I have ever had the misfortune of layin' eyes on,

I have it right here. How to Hypnotize Your Boss.

I have it. This is the real question. Here we go.

I have kissed a bunch of people and animals.

I have little cat feet.

I have no army. Dreamland is screwed!

I have no idea what I'm looking at.

I have such a yearning for opposable thumbs.

I have to start believing in myself because I'm a savior

I haven't done any of those things.

I hear you, I do.

I heard that.

I hope that don't mean bubonic plague! [babbles]

I hope you're proud of yourself.

I intend to.

I just figured out this was a bad idea

I just had you to fulfill a prophecy, and now I'm a jealous,

I just heard about the coup.

I just lost everything in a card game except my pants

I just need time to forget

I just need you, my loyal subjects, to trust me as your queen.

I just saved you, dear

I just thought he liked sweets

I just thought since the three of us are kind of an item,

I just wanna squeeze and stab and subjugate people.

I know a lot of psychos.

I know a place we can keep Zøg that's completely soundproof.

I know how we can get out of here. Follow me.

I know is hard to believe, but I was once in love. Real love.

I know it's creepy

I know it's hard to see, but try to hit my neck

I know that blue kid. He lives in my building.

I know what it feels like to be burned alive by a mob of idiots.

I know what would be fun

I know what you mean.

I know you can do this. I watched you march right into Hell

I know you can't say "freak," and I know you can't say "home,"

I know you didn't mean for me to overhear that

I know you don't trust me, but whatever you do, do not trust him.

I know you're lying, but I hope one day you'll mean that

I know you're not Bean, just a demon that's been sent to torture me,

I know you're up there! I can hear you tiptoein' around!

I know, but calm down. We can do this together.

I know. It's in the middle again

I learnt there's an enemy lurkin' among us.

I left because I didn't want to get hurt again,

I let the sun dry it out, and then I whittled it into a life size copy of her.

I lied! [babbling]

I like this. Let's see

I like what I'm seeing, but I gotta go

I like you better than that other cat. He questioned my sanity.

I like your little jig. We'll add it to the act

I look to you as the world's foremost authority.

I lost ten good men to the frozen north,

I love you both

I made noises no human earholes should ever hear.

I made something for you.

I may not be destined to lead

I mean in Steamland.

I mean, Bean.

I mean, first Saphyria, now Mora

I mean, go to Hell for people. What else has gone to Hell?

I mean, he's our king.

I mean, I actually think yours is more free

I mean, I myself was shot with a flaming arrow

I mean, I will. Whatever!

I mean, if it really happened.

I mean, my queen, is up there fighting for me

I mean, people get turned to stone or burned alive,

I mean, she tried to poison your dad

I mean, this kingdom has rules, and to change them willy nilly

I mean, we're all at odds, but…

I mean, yeah. No… I'm… Or no, I haven't.

I mean, yes, Your Highness

I meant butt cleavage.

I meant our battle plan, but good to know.

I meant, mentally.

I miss my island so much. But I had big dreams.

I missed you, ma'am

I need to go to bed now

I never ask you for little favors,

I never had a true friend before.

I never loved you

I offer you my humble but fabulous magical services,

I pretty much just remember what Trixy told me. [shudders]

I promise.

I realize who I am and what's happening to me.

I really shouldn't swim with this head wound

I remember you used to eat

I rescued you for a reason. And it has everything to do with what's in here

I return your son to you, asking nothing in return

I rode around all day on a metal horse with a lady that talks in riddles.

I said don't look behind you!

I said, I hope it doesn't happen again.

I saw it. How did you

I saw one of your cartoons yesterday!

I say that to all my customers, but this time I mean it

I say we get together and make this prince a man.

I say we murder Zøg now,

I seen better pull ups on a baby!

I sent my brother Skybert to Dreamland, but I never heard back from him.

I should know. Some of my best friends are pine boxes.

I should torment you for the rest of your life,

I should've been holding my breath! [laughs] Spores make you so forgetful.

I should've made Elfo do it. He's played Dagmar before

I should've mentioned that. I don't like to open my mouth underwater

I still don't like you or your eyeball, but you have valuable experience.

I suppose so.

I suppose you're right.

I swallowed a lot of sea water.

I swear I'm gonna kill every last one of you!

I swear, Bean, I meant him no permanent harm,

I tailed Odval up and down

I think he's getting worse.

I think the insulting dummy really appeals to him

I think there is no finer place to call my new home

I think we're getting away with it.

I thought the dismal end of Zøg

I thought we were done with this charade when he went off and became a pig.

I thought we were past that. It's catchy, but you gotta cut it out

I thought you had to press the button.

I thought you said this was gonna help me escape.

I thought your buck teeth would've caught it.

I totally get why you went insane.

I use the term "blood" loosely. It's really more of a sauce

I used to come here when I wanted to get away and forget everything.

I wanna be your friend.

I want now. Uh, let's do now

I want to address all my subjects,

I want to switch bodies with you again

I want you both to know I'm gonna miss you.

I wanted to be a big star, but they said I didn't have what it takes.

I warn you, the ride may get a little bumpy.

I was conceived in this bed.

I was devastated. So you know what I did?

I was disappointed both times. Disappointment's a form of caring.

I was hoping you'd at least keep that look for the party, Dagmar…

I was just, uh…

I was so happy. It was pure bliss.

I will never find that boot again. [groaning]

I will wipe all traces of the ogre nation from the land!

I wish all you gals came with a diagram.

I wish I may, I wish I might, eat the dish I fish tonight

I wish you had more horsepower, Smokey

I wish you the best with that mole skank, Craig!

I withdraw my challenge and salute your various exploits.

I woke up and she was gone.

I won't say that doesn't hurt.

I wonder if he's recovering

I wonder if she'll miss her road map.

I wonder what "the walls have eyes" means.

I wonder what happened to this poor bastard.

I would be honored.

I, Prince Merkimer of Bentwood, welcome you all to my return.

I'd be a quivering mass of boneheaded jelly

I'd be with my psycho dad. Or my psycho mom.

I'd know my fine, dimpled ass anywhere.

I'd like to help you if I could understand you, Pig Merkimer

I'd rescue him anywhere. We gotta get the band back,

I'd throw this can right at your face.

I'll allow it.

I'll be back tomorrow for the 5:00 a.m. hose down

I'll be fine.

I'll be in touch.

I'll be your donkey cart driver and tour guide for the next 23 hours.

I'll do it if you come crawling and beg me.

I'll find you, Elfo! I'll get you back!

I'll get the catapult ready. We can toss him over right now.

I'll just be over here, pressing this guy for information.

I'll just put it here by your bed. I love you, Father

I'll never fall for one of your tricks again

I'll never give up Elfo! We can give you a jester?

I'll order your usual fanfare immediately. [claps twice]

I'll punch holes in it so you can see where we're going.

I'll scamper off and get help

I'll show them

I'll show Zøg and that stupid cat. Nobody messes with my evil plans.

I'll smash your face in. And Luci will bite your ankles!

I'll tell Denise you said

I'll tell you exactly what's happening.

I'm a princess from a magical land far away

I'm addicted to stealing wallets now

I'm afraid not

I'm also sorry you broke the screen. That was an expensive prototype.

I'm an elf, I bounce.

I'm Bean.

I'm bettin' on, like, the fat guy.

I'm cold, and I hate everything, and this gravel really hurts,

I'm dead. I'm dead and I'm in Hell

I'm descending into madness, madness,

I'm feelin' great!

I'm feeling things down below and I don't even have a down below.

I'm flattered, sire

I'm glad those awards ain't around to see this

I'm glad we ran them over.

I'm glad you didn't bash in my head

I'm gonna be honest

I'm gonna break all your toys. Oh!

I'm gonna die for real

I'm gonna go eat some chow. I'm hungry

I'm gonna go get a snack. Hey, do I look fat?

I'm gonna ride the hell out of those rides and eat a pile of deep fried batter dogs.

I'm gonna tell your mumsy and daddy about this

I'm good

I'm guessing she works in Human Resources. She looks like this.

I'm having that dream with them pickled babies again

I'm here to free you, but if I smash your face in, I'm not apologizing

I'm in no mood, Pierre. I'm assuming your name is Pierre.

I'm just a flabby husk of a man

I'm kiddin'. You look like you can take a joke.

I'm listening hard, but I need you to listen back.

I'm never riding a horse again! This is the height of luxury.

I'm no decision maker, I'm an action taker

I'm not a monster. They're the monsters.

I'm not at all.

I'm not getting out of here without you

I'm not going anywhere.

I'm not gonna ask where you pulled that from.

I'm not gonna hit you, I promise!

I'm not in there now

I'm not kneeling, I'm dying.

I'm not sure

I'm not sure what that word means, but look at this.

I'm not throwing valuable servants over the wall

I'm not tired

I'm not trying to help

I'm not your friend. I'm your queen.

I'm not. You're crying.

I'm not… I'm standing still

I'm queen for a day, and I ruin everything.

I'm ready for my evening massage, Caresso

I'm right here.

I'm right in front of you, stupid! Ow!

I'm so sorry I got you guys into this.

I'm so sorry!

I'm so very, very, very, very, very…

I'm so vulnerable and you're so mean.

I'm sorry, Bean. She threatened to shoot me

I'm sorry, but we're not taking refugees today.

I'm sorry, Elfo.

I'm sorry, I'm not following.

I'm stuck with the sad, empty feeling of heartbreak

I'm sure she's exhausted from the long swim

I'm sure they'll skin me, roast me, and eat me quickly

I'm sure to find evidence of witchcraft in the princess' bedroom.

I'm sure you recognize these floor plans from your heist. My baby's first felony

I'm talking about roistering and rutting!

I'm the loudest guy in Dreamland

I'm thinking the lady next door who has that little chihuahua

I'm too young to be buried in a coffin and too old to get out of it on my own

I'm waiting

I'm who goes there?

I'm your knight in rusty armor.

I'm… Tia.

I've always wanted teeny tiny grandchildren!

I've been fakin' it so you wouldn't kill me off,

I've been hanging off a blimp for, like, a while.

I've been through a lot. I evaded two loveless weddings,

I've got a lot to do now

I've got so much love and nobody to give it to.

I've gotta go undercover as her loving daughter

I've gotten high in your drug dens and I passed out in your barrels

I've had a lot of people leave me in my life,

I've heard every man's home is his castle, but this place is a dump.

I've imprisoned everyone who laughed at me, belittled me,

I've never dated anyone.

I've seen things no human eyeballs should ever see.

I've shopped at your stores and peed in your fountains

I've thought about you every single day since you've been gone,

I… I…

If any of you has reason why these two should not be married, clam up.

If anything, I got bedbugs from you. I'm only doing this for Bean

If he's okay, tell him I'm alive

If I believed a word of this,

If I can't trust you, how can I trust you to tell me who to trust?

If I do not go now, I cannot return when least expect.

If I don't go away now, I may never be able to come back

If I need a mug, I'll go and use it at the bar.

If I wanted to be annoyed, I'd be home with my family! Shush!

If I weren't the real Dagmar, would I say this?

If looks could kill, you'd be arrested for double murder.

If only! You know that's been banned

If someone else is plotting without us, I will be really miffed

If something happens to you, the kingdom would be without a ruler

If Trøgs have been to the surface, how come we've never seen you?

If we both stay calm, and nobody makes any sudden moves,

If we can round up enough exotic animals, yes.

If we don't make it out of this together,

If we find the gun, we've got the murderer.

If we go up to the surface and do something evil up there

If we survive, we should really consider playing more team sports.

If we're gonna catch up to the Archdruidess,

If you have any questions, feel free to ask the happy miners.

If you hold my hand, you can breathe underwater.

If you like raw eggs

If you'd married our spoiled, ungrateful son in the first place.

If you're cheering and clapping while I'm talking,

Impressive. For a human

Impressive. Imprisoning a king in his room like a common criminal

In a comical yet suspicious manner. Ow!

In a way, you're kind of lucky you've never had a real romance.

In case things take a turn for the worse

In due time, Bean. In due time

In fact, all of you weirdos ought to thank me.

In that battle over the canal we don't use anymore

In the alphabet, there's no letter after "Z

In those brief moments between sleep and wakefulness,

In three, two, one.

In ways that don't involve honking or punching

In which case, the witch…

Including me, including you…

Indeed. But I fear Zøg is not as easy a target as Yøg

Indeed. Fortunately, I may have discovered

Indeed. The time to act is now. Wink, wink.

Inquisition starts in five, four, three, two…

Insert coin

Intellect is king. Isn't that right, sugarlobes?

Is good realization.

Is hiding a brilliant strategy?

Is it another beach?

Is it still true love if your wallet is missing?

Is no murder cult, Bean. Just depressing sex club.

Is no shame. You have nice butt cheeks.

Is that Merkimer? [groans]

Is the new throne to your liking, Your Majesty?

Is there a stable Elfo that I haven't met yet?

Is true. Zøg reminded me of Yøg.

Is your life so awful you have to keep wrecking mine?

Isn't it weird the monster ate everything in sight,

It begins and ends at our meeting at the next full moon.

It can't be any worse than the talks I've had inside my own head.

It is inconvenient that Zøg is still alive.

It rampaged through my pantry and befouled everything.

It should be on the nightstand, but Bunty might have moved it

It stole my butter.

It tossed Granny into the next kingdom.

It trampled my corn with its humongous feet.

It was I.

It was so hot that I didn't even care about the sand, if you know what I mean.

It was the big lady with the white hair. The one who looks like her

It would take a lot of love making with me to change my mind

It would take a wizard of great competence to produce such a spell

It'll be an honor breaking them both.

It'll be paradise,

It'll either cure him or kill him.

It's "doesn't talk no more."

It's a freak show from where I am, too

It's a heavenly mermaid, such as yours truly.

It's a long story, but seeing as you'll never get out, pull up a seat

It's a way out… of this idiotic conversation.

It's about loneliness and uncertainty

It's almost midnight and I'm gettin' hungry.

It's an unmarked castle about 20 miles from here. You can't miss it

It's as educational as it is moisturizing.

It's as if the killer planned it that way, you know?

It's called a gift bladder for carrying small tokens and stuff.

It's frustratingly vague,

It's gotta be! Next card.

It's great that you got some rest, 'cause I need your help.

It's green smoke.

It's hard being a wizard and a golf caddy at the same time.

It's her! Right in front of us!

It's hideous.

It's in the middle

It's in there, isn't it?

It's kind of like a farm, with less milking and more stabbing.

It's like a puzzle you solve with your feet.

It's no use. We're stuck.

It's no wonder he don't talk no more, yeah?

It's not a monster, okay? It's Prince Merkimer.

It's not drugs, silly. It's pure, uncut love.

It's not good.

It's Odval! Odval killed Pendergast.

It's okay, Bean! I've learned how to roll.

It's okay, Bean.

It's okay, Dad. I'm here for you

It's Pendergast!

It's pitch black in there, anyway

It's pretty good.

It's probably those smartass teenagers getting high in the woods again.

It's quiet. Maybe they're making up

It's right here

It's right in front of you.

It's settled. She is the real Dagmar. Seize the impostor

It's that when you're stuck in a cave with your psycho mom,

It's the end of an era. Bean's real royalty now

It's the first time I've hugged you since you tried to kill me

It's the full moon, silly.

It's the least I could do after killing you.

It's the worst word you can say, apart from "freak" and "show."

It's time to go home. [whistles]

It's time to go, Dad.

It's time to shed skin and leave, Bean.

It's Tuesday night. You know what begins in 20 minutes

It's where we put that zydeco band.

It's you! You saved me!

Jenkins, work on your issues.

Jump in!

Just a fat, greasy pig

Just a sec. [retches]

Just be careful. Don't let her mess with your head

Just forget it.

Just go home to Denise. I'm sure you guys can, you know…

Just like old times, eh, Merk?

Just like your grandmother made.

Just promise you'll think about giving me another chance

Just so you could have more poor people to tax.

Just sound any alarm!

Just take the ding dang horse.

Just throw servants over the wall

Just what a resurrected witch would say.

Just, you come here

Just… [sighs] Just be there at midnight.

Justice!

Keep dreamin', 'cause I'm the only king here forever

Keepers of the secret, what is the greatest sin?

Kept alive by the miracle of science,

Kiddo, I would love to have you as one of my exes,

King Rulo to you. Who wants to know?

King Zøg is a danger to himself and, more important, to me.

Kitty cat, I'm going crazy. [whimpers]

Lackeys, lickspittles, flunkies, flatterers, ass kissers

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, hags and geezers,

Ladies, let's give Mora some space

Last time I saw him, he was in the corner trying to mount his own shadow.

Laughing Horse, you're just encouraging him

Lava? Who just keeps lava lying around?

League of Gallivanting Scrutinators, of course

Leaning the body right up against the door like that.

Leave me alone, okay?

Leave me be. I'm crestfallen and I can't get up.

Leaves everything with the dream of seeing her name in lights.

Leavo, as in, dread pirate Leavo! He beat me up, remember?

Leg of lamb is there, too, yes. Ah, big leg. Of lamb

Leg of lamb?

Less to carry, thank you

Lest it destroy the kingdom

Let her go. You're free to leave anytime you want

Let me move these levers out of the way

Let the ceremony begin

Let us celebrate her return and jubilantly proclaim…

Let us in right now or I'll have you transferred to an early grave.

Let us toast. To us.

Let's give a big Trøgtown welcome to our I can still hear it!

Let's give a big Trøgtown welcome to our guest of honor,

Let's go home. The kingdom needs you. I need you. I mostly need you to talk

Let's go, already!

Let's murder everyone in that stupid Secret Society right this second.

Let's not say anything to anger El Porko Loco

Life sucks

Like a manic little beaver girl!

Like any two numbers, this don't add up

Like go to my room and cry in the fetal position

Like sand crab?

Like she's some kind of voluptuous goddess

Like This Whapsee? Well, how do you play?

Like us!

Like when people say they'll be in touch.

Like when we're antiquing. Wink, wink.

Like, "Hey, Bean, why are you so lonely?"

Like, how bad I smell.

Like, leave my kingdom and head out for adventure.

Like, okay, I don't share this often,

Like, scram, nose job. He's my chump now.

Listen, buddy, you gotta sneak back in that castle

Listen, I need to talk to you.

Listen, you can hear it right now

Listen. You're the only guy I trust, except that elf on the rope

Lock up the sangria, Mora's back!

Loitering outside of designated work zones is grounds for dismissal

Look at it! It left an imprint!

Look at me, Trixy. Hiding. Like a wimp

Look at that glowering old fool. It's clear he's unfit to lead

Look into my eye, Your Majesty.

Look what I found!

Look, a hole in his armor.

Look, Bean, I know things are awful between us

Look, boys

Look, Edith, the card said so!

Look, I've gotten you this far, okay?

Look, that ceiling panel's opening up.

Look, the symbol.

Look, there it goes!

Look! They're going around in circles! We can't miss!

Lorenzo always gets what he wants.

Lots of people have access to your room, Bean

Love is risky! That's what makes it so great.

Lower the drawbridge.

Lower the drawbridge.

Lower the goddamn drawbridge, will ya, huh?

Luci, I need you to stay here and take care of my dad.

Luci, stair! Stair, stair, stair!

Luci, sweetness, you haven't finished your rat bones

Luci, you wouldn't leave me, would you?

Luci! Stop making that racket. I will shank you.

Luci! Ugh.

Luci?

Lucky I brought a figurin' out cigar

Mad

Madness, madness, madness, madness,

Madness, madness, madness, madness, madness, madness.

Make us some money while we're away!

Making Dreamland into a rigid theocracy with a rich, full, spiritual life.

Man, after work drinks taste so much better than instead of work drinks.

Man, Dreamland is in trouble. We've gotta do something.

Man, I feel sorry for whoever they're talkin' about

Man, I sound like a nutjob

Man, I wish the automat could give me what I really want.

Man, she's got that abandoning you thing down.

Man, these Trøgs are spooky, but this cold, hard sleep nook seems cozy enough.

Man, what is this, like, the fourth time we've been imprisoned against our will?

Manipulative mess because you won't do what I say! Ow!

Maybe I will drown you.

Maybe if your disposition were a little sunnier…

Maybe it's a kosher monster?

Maybe that's just your head wound speaking

Maybe that's my purpose.

Maybe the mean lady will be at the amusement park.

Maybe the scary woods will accept me?

Maybe you should, uh, like, kill him?

Maybe you weren't a monster when I found you,

Me and Bean both had our hearts broken

Me got him. Let's go

Me.

Me.

Meanwhile, my friend, ugh…

Meet Inky Winky

Meet my son, Petey

Merkimer, did you see a monster around here?

Merkimer, do something.

Merkimer, I've come to a decision. I want to be a pig again

Merkimer, say something.

Merkimer, shut up. You're not helping

Merkimer.

Mermaid scientists believe that in the future,

Mermaids navigate by the night sky. Sailors stole that from us.

Mind if I squeeze in?

Miss Adventure. The name is right there on her ass.

Missy and I are just having a little lovers' spat.

Misunderstood. Rejected. Pushed aside and forgotten.

Mmm hmm

Mmm hmm

Mmm hmm. Remind you of anyone, Elfo?

Mmm, is it time for pork rump? [exclaims]

Mmm, those crazy runes tell of a battle fought in Dreamland long ago,

Mmm, with an emphasis on rich, baby. Hallelujah, amen and ka ching!

Mmm, yum

Mmm! [chomping]

Mmm.

Mmm… [mumbles]

Modesty.

Mom, what's the deal with the crazy music?

Mom! I'm alive.

Mom! Mom!

Mom? I'm talking to you

Mom? Wait… How did you…

Mommy, wait! My needs outweigh your scorn!

Mop Girl, fetch me my royal stompers.

Mora swam to Steamland to make it in the moving pictures.

Mora!

Mora!

More beer? Six pack for the princess.

More cleavage.

More, please.

Morning, Tia.

Most of all… I wish I was a better king

Mother was a homely woman.

Move it, you dirty maggots and Mertz's mom!

Moving along now, the latest in my menagerie of marvelocity,

Murbish, Tertz, we're looking for Pendergast

My beautiful daughter, Princess Tiabeanie!

My branch of the society has been desperate

My dad needs to go away for a while.

My eldest daughter has come home.

My greatest desire is to put that all aside

My hand? Wha…

My hat is drooping and my shoes are uncurling

My kingdom's outta control, my closest allies are now my mortal enemies,

My latest invention, to beg you not to leave.

My life isn't so great

My mom's not just messing with heads, she's eating them

My name's Derek

My one regret is that I didn't start taking drugs at younger age.

My pillow's not gonna sob into itself

My poor Bean. Tricked by a pig

My teeth are prominent, but they don't stick out sideways.

My whole life has been a lie. The mother I trusted is evil.

My, what a squirmer

Naked Bean and Oona were the crowning touch

Name a place, any place, that you have been that I have not.

Name's Sagatha

Nature is full of green.

Nay, comrades, I must remain, continuing my secret mission, underground,

Never ever, ever, ever burn me alive at the stake again.

Never forget that.

Never mind all that.

New edict! "From now on, all weirdos get to do whatever they want!"

Next time just bring the sour part

Next time, keep your mouth closed.

Nice dress. Let's get this circus underway.

Nine months later, I was godmother to young Fleebor

No amount of drugs in the world could explain them.

No can do, P.T

No foolin' now, this is a serious situation

No more honking.

No one hurt him any more than he already is.

No way, you greedy bastard.

No wonder I couldn't find her. She shrank herself.

No worries. From the sound of it, he'll soon be as dead as his daughter

No, don't shoot.

No, Elfo, I can't. I'm cursed.

No, he too hacky, even for us.

No, he's not a jockey.

No, I can't leave. And I believe it's pronounced "skedaddle."

No, I couldn't sleep with all that sobbing

No, I meant figuratively.

No, I screwed up royally.

No, I'm alive. I hid big skillet under tunic

No, I'm not giving them Elfo.

No, I'm not going to apologize anymore.

No, I'm not. I love it!

No, is effect of drugs.

No, it's not

No, let me out of the coffin. I'll be good.

No, look at me

No, no, no, don't take the stairs!

No, no, no. No, no, no. No!

No, no, no. No!

No, no, not that one.

No, no!

No, not here, there

No, not the raccoon alarm

No, of course not. But I don't know what broadcasting is

No, Oona, not like sea turtle.

No, please do not tell her anything about me

No, really, I have. I got burned at the stake and stuff

No, Slappo's still alive, and those sweet, snarling dogs, too

No, thanks. That's just gonna make me sadder

No, that's not it. All right, take two

No, that's not what I said.

No, they're just testing our product.

No, they're not. We're barely people ourselves

No, this is not a vendetta.

No, too scary. This way

No, wait, wait, wait. That's not it. That's not it.

No, we don't.

No, well… Try that out, yes

No, you are! That's who

No, you saved us, Merkimer.

No, you. Just put the spork down

No, you're doing something to make Ow!

No, your other foot.

No, your other there

No, Zøggy, I am married to ocean now.

No! …happening again!

No! Violence never solves anything.

No! Who goes there, goes there. And now they're gone

No?

No. I mean, I…

No. Is not best tactic.

No. No, Luci!

No. There's no way I'm giving my best friend to those monsters.

No. Till death do us part, Beanie baby

Nobody cared either time I came back to life.

Noice

Noice! I don't want to miss this

None shall rise!

Nonsense. Why, look, Pendergast is right here.

Nope.

Nostrils. Weird little hats.

Not "why," you idiot. "Who." Besides, you know who it is. It's Bean

Not a chance

Not even a honk, for old time's sake?

Not in that thing, you ain't.

Not just the snooty ones with scepters up their butts

Not just your tiny fan club.

Not me. Hospitals give me the willies.

Not my fault. Maybe a little bit. Whatever.

Not necessary. That hot trash is with me.

Not on this Up A Go Down Wheel, that would be a living hell

Not one beholden to superstition and magic.

Not really.

Not since he told us to meet up with him to help Zøg

Not so fast! Caught you!

Not the little door!

Not there, over there.

Nothing. Nothing at all. [chuckles]

Now called Steamland.

Now come along. They stop serving breakfast cocktails in five minutes

Now get your beauty sleep

Now go up there, but don't get bamboozled by the cards

Now how's about givin' mama a little of what she wants, huh?

Now I don't know what's real and what's a dream.

Now I'm trying to find my little buddy, Elfo

Now it'll be even easier to run away together.

Now let's see our future.

Now swim for it, before the crabs swarm over you

Now that's the way a queen threatens her enemies

Now they're dancing?

Now tiptoe in and put the roast poodle close enough to smell, but not too close.

Now we really mad

Now what?

Now who's with me?

Now with bubbles! 14 cents!

Now you're not talking at all?

Now, all you have to tell those sweet boys… [groans]

Now, as you scream,

Now, down on your bellies, you worthless worms!

Now, everyone bow their heads in prayer

Now, I've drawn in the Trøgs' secret tunnels

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'd like to enjoy this butter I stole.

Now, let the celebration of all things Merkimer begin.

Now, maybe can we talk about the money and weapons we came here for?

Now, nothing stands in the way of our grand secret scheme

Now, now. We mustn't risk our immortal souls by killing him

Now, Sorcerio. Fling open the green door.

Now, start cheerin'!

Now, to blend invisibly into the crowd

Now, we have all waited a long time for this.

Now, where were we? Oh, yes, right here.

Now, would you like me to answer those other questions

Now, you listen up and you listen good.

Obviously, we're not fixated on traditional body norms

Odval never had the nerve.

Odval would have my job. I hate that it's a man's world.

Odval! Sassy cat needs a bath!

Of all the jerks in this jerk kingdom, I think the worst is Merkimer

Of course, no. Yeah.

Of course! I don't know how to get to the amusement park on my own.

Of Pirate Queen Oona and Princess Tiabeanie,

Of Princess Tiabeanie!

Of rampaging naked across the countryside.

Ogres are attacking, and we're all gonna die.

Oh, a warning sign! "Beware of…" Uh oh

Oh, ah… [smacks lips]

Oh, and… [exclaiming]

Oh, Bean, get over here. You gotta look at this

Oh, Bean, I don't think that's happened yet,

Oh, Bean, who knows what happens in the fog of war?

Oh, Bean, you're alive! I'm sorry for everything.

Oh, Bean, you're right. It's uncanny.

Oh, Bean! I've missed you!

Oh, Beanie, you already are

Oh, Big Jo, I've heard so much about your stoic manner and indomitable spirit.

Oh, books lie all the time

Oh, boy, here we go.

Oh, boy. Thank God this is just a hallucination.

Oh, by suction cups. Listen, I must vamoose for a while.

Oh, cool. I see you kept all my doll furniture.

Oh, dear. The people mustn't see that or they'll restore him to the throne

Oh, Edith

Oh, Elfo, an ear notch? That's cage thinking.

Oh, Elfo, are you seasick?

Oh, Elfo, that could be love or lemon meringue pie

Oh, Elfo, that's crazy

Oh, Elfo. Just one

Oh, God

Oh, God

Oh, God, my ass is stuck.

Oh, God, they're gettin' uglier

Oh, God.

Oh, good idea.

Oh, good, he's honking. That's better than screaming.

Oh, good. He crazy'd himself to sleep

Oh, happy day

Oh, he's not gonna mess with daddy's little girl

Oh, hello, ghost of Elfo!

Oh, hello, pretty pony

Oh, help me. Help me, I need help

Oh, here we go

Oh, hey, deadbeats

Oh, hi, Bean. I'm a man now.

Oh, I am totally gonna go. Look at this!

Oh, I can't part with that one. That's Freckles.

Oh, I don't have that sort of time.

Oh, I don't know

Oh, I get it. It's because we're in a lonely freak show.

Oh, I had nothing to do with that, dear.

Oh, I know that feeling.

Oh, I like that. Hey!

Oh, I love "Foggy Mountain Airship Disaster

Oh, I remember you, you're Zøg's daughter.

Oh, I see this castle already has a dummy

Oh, I think can duble it.

Oh, I thought we lost you.

Oh, I wanted to gloat directly over our victim's corpse

Oh, I'll tell you how I'm feelin'.

Oh, I'm not a majesty anymore. I'm a common idiot just like you fellas

Oh, I'm so sorry I didn't marry a pig

Oh, I've been all over.

Oh, if you touch one hair on his head…

Oh, is this thing on?

Oh, it's no use. I'm trapped

Oh, Lady Bowmore, welcome back!

Oh, look at all these wallets. People are so trusting

Oh, love the homicidal impulse, but no.

Oh, man, I can't get this thing open.

Oh, Merkimer.

Oh, Merkimer. I'm so disappointed in you.

Oh, Mom, you're all I have

Oh, mother! You came!

Oh, Mr. Odval?

Oh, my God

Oh, my God, are you serious? Skedoodle, skedaddle, who cares?

Oh, my God, Bean, I know what happened

Oh, my God, Edith! You have a body!

Oh, my God, enough with the romantic fantasies

Oh, my God, I wanna shower again.

Oh, my God, I'm insulting myself.

Oh, my God, it's the same logo that was on Elfo's pin!

Oh, my God, we form a trio. Just like the Trøgs said.

Oh, my God, you guys. It totally looks like he's talking!

Oh, my God, you're out of your cage

Oh, my God! I need to be a friend to Dreamland.

Oh, my God! Who did this?

Oh, my God. Calm down

Oh, my God. Can you at least show my dad some dignity?

Oh, my God. Did you use the stairs?

Oh, my God. They're not gonna kill my dad, are they?

Oh, my gosh, Bean, look! It's a shooting star.

Oh, my gosh! It's exactly like my bedroom from when I was little

Oh, my, no

Oh, my, the smearing.

Oh, my, you've already become delirious. You'd best get to beddy bye, sire

Oh, my! Finger lightning!

Oh, my! I never thought I'd live to braid a queen's hair.

Oh, my. What fun.

Oh, no

Oh, no

Oh, no, he's at Losers' Leap,

Oh, no, I can't remember what that whistle is for.

Oh, no, I gotta pee.

Oh, no, I'm not falling for that one again. You're going to hit me.

Oh, no, that wrinkled old buffoon always mixes up the pages.

Oh, no, the smoke's gone from the Badlands to the Even Worse Lands!

Oh, no, we'll never get past him.

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

Oh, no! Dad? This is bad.

Oh, no! I hope I die this time!

Oh, no! Run!

Oh, no! The sacred goo!

Oh, no.

Oh, no. Dad!

Oh, no. I am trapped in here with no way out

Oh, no. Not again.

Oh, no. She's hurt.

Oh, Oddie, it's not couples therapy if only one of us is putting in the work.

Oh, okay. Let's stop bragging

Oh, ow! Ow! Ow!

Oh, Pendergast, you were my only hope. Now you're dead and just a Penderghost

Oh, please. Oh, please. Oh, please.

Oh, poor Zøg.

Oh, shut up, Darrell.

Oh, snaps!

Oh, so I guess Bean didn't tell you about her late night earlobe nibbling escapade?

Oh, Sorcerio, am I crazy?

Oh, sorry, Bean. I'm reading a really interesting pictorial

Oh, sorry, there's not a ton of…

Oh, sorry!

Oh, sorry.

Oh, sorry.

Oh, sorry. I forget to take off price tag.

Oh, sure.

Oh, sweet butter, you're the only thing right with the world.

Oh, thank God.

Oh, there you are

Oh, this is torture

Oh, this ought to be good.

Oh, this ruins so many fantasies but opens up so many new ones

Oh, Turbish, how considerate of you.

Oh, Turbish! Turbish, are you dead?

Oh, Turbish? Would you step in here for a minute, please?

Oh, uh… [chuckles]

Oh, wait, he died trying to help me.

Oh, wait, it's upside down.

Oh, wait, yeah, your pathetic love life. Sorry, yes, continue

Oh, we did it, Oddie.

Oh, we know. We live one floor up from Hell

Oh, well, that's the pork sausages.

Oh, who am I foolin', waitin' on those yutzes?

Oh, whoa.

Oh, wow

Oh, wow. I did not expect that.

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah, we all saw it, Elfo.

Oh, yeah? What? Corned beef?

Oh, yeah. I should've reminded you.

Oh, yeah. Pendergast never showed up

Oh, yes

Oh, yes, evil stepmother trope is very problematic.

Oh, yes, he's a screamer.

Oh, yes! Oh, yes!

Oh, you know math isn't my strength, but yes. The newcomers are here

Oh, you promised!

Oh, you're always doing that.

Oh, you're so going to die.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh! A buzzbrighter!

Oh! Act casual, she's looking right at us.

Oh! I guess you'll want to get back to your fairytale life, then

Oh! I love you so much more than New Daddy.

Oh! Is he some sort of an electric man?

Oh! Princess Tiabeanie and an unfinished man.

Oh! You showed up. Okay, showtime.

Oh?

Oh? And what are you going to do about it?

Oh? Which is?

Oh.

Oh.

Oh. [sighs]

Oh. Damn it.

Oh. Did you just smack me on the bum bum?

Oh. Hello, Elfo. Last time I saw you, you were a lot more dead

Oh. Hello, Luci.

Oh. Okay, you know what? Kissy was right

Oh. Right. Hello… Wait

Oh. The hicks throw 'em at my head when I do somersaults.

Oh. This ain't good. I can't leave you here.

Okay, Abner.

Okay, ball. I need answers.

Okay, Elfo

Okay, everybody! Move along. Haven't you seen a honking king before?

Okay, fine, but my arms are really tired.

Okay, I get it. I have a hot mom.

Okay, I got this

Okay, I really must go. It's Mertz's mom's birthday

Okay, I'll stop.

Okay, I'm done.

Okay, it's this one

Okay, jerks. I'll admit it.

Okay, just, please give me a second

Okay, kid, we're gonna work on your gullibility

Okay, Leavo. This is a real jailbreak. Let's skedoodle.

Okay, let's get this coronation over with.

Okay, let's split up.

Okay, make it through tonight and you make it through basic training.

Okay, now lure it over

Okay, okay, three elves walk into a candy bar

Okay, Oona, I stay here. [snoring]

Okay, put it over there

Okay, so, you see that crazy castle over there?

Okay, that's enough

Okay, that's quite enough, Tiabeanie.

Okay, this bedpost unscrews, Bean's drugs are in there

Okay, um, play me in with a little fanfare, Luci.

Okay, until we find out what it is, we're not burning anything

Okay, we're gonna have a talk.

Okay, well, um, this one time in Hell, I thought I saw a demon's butt,

Okay, what is this?

Okay, your turn, Elfo.

Okay, Zøg, get a hold of yourself. You're not gonna die immediately

Okay.

Okie dokie, Your Highness

Old man Malfus! Laughing Horse! Malfus, maybe you can help us

On all subsequent successors to the throne

On bread mold? And you can't have any.

On one side, a ferocious yeti. On the other side, a ferocious bigfoot

On the bright side, I'm gonna see all my dead relatives.

On the bright side, look at this cool trick I just taught the human you.

On the condition that you promise you will never touch again."

On the count of three, just splatter me good

Once again, the rich white girl gets away with it.

Once we know the real one's dead for sure, we can start Phase Two

Once, I lived a wild and carefree bachelor life

One little favor?

One of my freaks is giving me a lot of static.

One of the holiest sites in all of Trøgentology.

One of your many handsome fiancés.

One time, I rescued him from Hell and he thanked me by being pissy for weeks.

One where the guy accidentally got killed.

One, stand up tall and suck your stomach in.

Only a male heir can be crowned, but now this?

Only the king can change the law.

Only thing we must do now is wait for them to come to us.

Only with my ancient glasses.

Ooh, it's gettin' pretty spooky out here.

Ooh, ooh, ooh!

Ooh, the last one I know. 'Cause it's nighttime.

Ooh, the mystery of the missin' mugs

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ooh! I look like a macho flowerpot

Ooh.

Ooh. Gecko style.

Ooh. It's so cool you're in the army now. I love an elf who conforms

Oona, how do we show them?

Oona, no!

Oona, stop hibernating

Oona! You're my queen again.

Oops, I let go.

Oops!

Open any glass door where you see a sandwich

Open it up! Help

Or an invisibility cloak

Or any day.

Or beat me at badminton.

Or behind? I don't know, it's a circle

Or dependencies under your jurisdiction,

Or did you just need to get it out of your system?

Or disgust

Or her fists of lead

Or I'll come up there and strangle the both of you!

Or in the kitchen.

Or scurvy. When does scurvy kick in?

Or shell anything

Or should I say "Bean"?

Or should you say "Alva"?

Or should you say "Gordy"?

Or sociopathic enough to lead.

Or some really fast cows.

Or the ladder or whatever we usually use to get up there

Or the much more inconsequential return of Stryker and Bolt?

Or the Secret Society?

Or those teenagers we ran over a while back.

Otherwise, you'd be one dead witch.

Our new homeland.

Out for a midnight stroll? Why, so was I.

Ow

Ow, my ass

Ow, my nose!

Ow, ow, ow

Ow, ow, ow

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Ow! Damn it!

Ow! Hey! Stop it, bub!

Ow! Hmm.

Ow! I'm cured

Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow. Ow. Ow

P.T. really had that punch comin'.

Pack your cheeseballs. We're going to Bentwood.

Pants down, Elfo! Oh, I'll do it.

Pendergast, stay here and make sure Zøg never leaves this room

Pendergast! Oh, it's funny 'cause it's true

Pendergast! You're alive!

Pendergast?

People discovered his robes were perfectly clean

People no longer expect things from you and you get to stop showering.

People say they have personal demons,

Perhaps it's because I've spent a lifetime

Perhaps new friends?

Perhaps we should say the de crowning touch

Perhaps you should put on some armor first

Perhaps you'd be interested in this eyeless frog dummy?

Phew!

Piracy is very cutthroat business, is not even joke. Or isn't?

Please do. They're awaiting you in the dungeon

Please stop that.

Please, call us what we call ourselves.

Please, don't tell me you're gonna rob and beat me, too?

Please, I've got to know the rest of our destiny.

Please, Tiabeanie, you can trust us.

Plus, I couldn't sell you at the indoor swap meet.

Plus, I like to keep my enemies close.

Plus, I'm not the cute one anymore.

Point out all of Bean's hiding spots so we can stash the gun

Poor, sweet Elmo. He's always been there for us.

Porky has his own grill in the back of the wagon

Porky says he's going to put a scrapbook together,

Porky, get your ass off the floor. We're outta here.

Porky, I thought I told you not to embarrass me with your antics today.

Prayer games are over

Preparations seem to be proceeding beyond our wildest fantasies, sire.

Pretend we planned to meet here so no one yells at me for cutting in line.

Prince Merkimer might have something to say that'll change your minds

Prince Merkimer! Forgive me.

Prince Scruffles, tell us about this crown you lost.

Princess, the king has escaped from the mental ward

Princess, you've returned. What news of Bentwood?

Prison's changed you, Bean.

Probably just an army marching here to kill you all.

Psst! Oona, vake up. I have something to ask you.

Pussy cat's got fleas!

Queen of what? There's no one here.

Queen Tiabeanie, where are you going?

Queen! Queen!

Quick, in there!

Quick! She'll learn about steam before we do.

Quickly now, before he slams the door

Quit ditherin' and start slitherin'!

Quit jabbin' me, I'll dance! I'll dance! [gasps] Oh.

Raise the drawbridge.

Raise the drawbridge.

Raise the drawbridge.

Rats, like, swiped 'em. [chuckles]

Really bad.

Really coulda used that money, though.

Really give it to him

Really?

Really?

Really? Escalator Girl asked about me?

Really? Seems kind of dangerous for a toddler

Recoil at the worst humanity has to offer in The Horrors of Puberty!

Refuse, and we kill all of you and take him, anyway

Release the kegs!

Remember our motto

Remember the Trøgs said we're the saviors?

Remember the wankers!

Remember when I gave myself all them genius awards?

Remember when we had a victory dinner after that battle,

Remember, he cannot handle any sort of surprise whatsoever.

Remember? You executed the guy who invented these? [gasps]

Repeat after me

Rhonda, I don't care what Bean did in the past, okay?

Right above Splatter Beach.

Right eo.

Right now, you're a delicate dandelion puff.

Right, Missy?

Right, on your feet

Righty o! Come along, children. You, too, Bunty Junior

Rising from the dead is witchcraft

Robots are basically tiny suits of armor without anyone inside of them

Roxanne, economics. Karly, linguistics. Snarla, bitterness.

Ruh oh.

Ruler over all

Rummaging through their treasures, when the Trøgs nabbed me

Running from your mother is so last year

Sad.

Sadly, I've had to commit to the moustache ever since.

Sagatha, will you give me your hand in marriage?

Say it, boy!

Say, what's the big idea agreein' with us?

Say, you're starting that island hunting resort

Seal team six, seal the hole!

Searching for the lost kingdom of the elves, which I

Second, I learned more about Odval's conspiracy.

Secret book of kings

See that grocery bag over there?

See who it is

See, Derek, there are two types of men in the world.

See? We're meant to be! And two Ds?

Seeing myself sitting there on the throne

Sergeant Touchy, feel out where we're vulnerable.

Seriously, all you have to do is report to work, do your job,

Set sail!

Settle an argument, Pendergast

Sex bingo!

Shaddup

Shaddup.

She appeared in the sky to illuminate the way to Mermaid Island,

She blindsided me. While I was looking right at her.

She can predict the future of anyone who possesses a mere quarter

She fell in love with a mermaid, but it might've been in her head

She makes me so angry,

She said she really admires how you started from the bottom

She says she's high.

She'll kill us all with her goo goo hoo doo voodoo walla walla

She's a psycho. If I were afraid, I wouldn't be here.

She's alarmingly more on top of things than her father.

She's an archdruidess and she says "shaddup" in the meanest way possible

She's an impostor. I am the real Dagmar

She's clearly a threat. And she might be on to us

She's gone.

She's not a man, she's a manly lady

She's not an ugly, evil bitch. But she is sluttier than I imagined

She's okay, for a drowner.

She's probably the only one brave, or foolish, enough.

She's right, you know?

She's this beautiful mermaid, but she's kinda sassy for a fish

She's trying not to panic herself.

Shh. Tuck him in

Ships will carry us up to space.

Shiyoo yoo!

Shling, shling, shling!

Shooting stars are angels plummeting to Hell

Shouldn't we be spending our time and money on the actual kingdom?

Shouldn't you be burrowing or giving me the space we talked about?

Shush! You're interrupting the most wondrous tale from our newest member.

Shut up and let me think.

Shut up, boys. I gotta warn my nutty dad.

Shut up, Derek. I'm looking for a traitor.

Shut up, Elfo, I'm not done yet.

Shut up, Elfo!

Shut up, Turbish

Shut up, you arrogant bastard.

Shut up, you're both little jerks. Now, look for the gun.

Shut up! You're dating Elfo?

Sigh

Sigh.

Sire, would you like to do something

Sire, you must revoke your pronouncements posthaste!

Sire? I don't know if you can hear me, and there's a ton of blood in your ears,

Sitting there with a charming little puppet on his lap. [chuckles]

Slip and slide, baby! Slip and slide!

Slowly, I learned to speak, but I held my tongue,

So as not to upset the king's delicate disposition.

So come back, okay?

So could one of you be a dearie

So describe this Elfo fella

So get your butts down there, and don't gimme any

So how'd you end up in a fish tank?

So I ended up doing cartoon voice work, and I'm happy for the gig and all,

So I feel comfortable saying this

So I want you to consider me more like your friend

So I'm gettin' one myself.

So I'm out.

So if we give them Elfo, they won't kill anyone.

So it must mean something

So it's agreed, we don't get caught.

So it's agreed. I'll take possession of the elf immediately.

So long, cruel jerks

So lower the goddamn drawbridge, will ya, huh?

So much gasping

So that's what it feels like.

So we're okay for now.

So you do want me to kill you? Okay, sounds like a plan

So you go get a coffin, drag it up here, and stick me in it

So you wear a fake moustache when you're yourself?

So you're okay by me, demon

So, Bean, I want you to know I love you, and you're pardoned.

So, how do you know about… What's it called? Astrophysics?

So, Leavo, what you in for?

So, may I see my father? I brought him some soup to cheer his soul

So, now that you're gonna be queen, does that mean we all move up a notch?

So, um, just wondering, in terms of our relationship, how are we?

So, you know anything else interesting about the world up there in the dots?

So…

Some crazy threesomes, though.

Some detective you are.

Some kind of evil cloud cover is coming our way.

Some people call them stars, but that's speculative.

Some people say that's why he's named "Porky."

Somebody kick my ass?

Somebody let me out of here!

Someday I will get that boot back. As God as my witness, I will get it back.

Someday, the right man, or woman, or creature will mate with you.

Someone must be getting executed

Someone must have helped those troublemakers escape death,

Sometimes, when I'm angry, I get tired, too

Sorcerio, have you done a head count?

Sorcerio, our fabulous wizard,

Sorcerio?

Sorry about the echo

Sorry I never went out with a human

Sorry I ruined everything.

Sorry, Elfo, I tried jiggling the latch. You live in there now.

Sorry, I don't have 30 seconds.

Sorry, I tend not to notice things that aren't me.

Sorry, I… I just had the craziest dream.

Sorry, I'm a little damp and cranky. Look at my shoes

Sorry, pally, better luck next time

Sorry, sorry!

Souls are meant for damnation, not soup! Oh, whatever, get in there

Souls? [scoffs]

Sound the ogre alarm!

Speaking of, it's almost time for quivering mass

Squirrel face!

Stan, I need to speak with the prisoners alone.

Stealing their eggs by night. I can dance

Steamland, an entire country, is out to get us.

Steamland.

Stience defeated!

Still, that does sound better than sad Elfo.

Stop bein' so agreeable!

Stop doing that!

Stop fretting, we're in the middle of the ocean

Stop harrumphing! We've got far more pressing matters!

Stop looking at me like that!

Stop moustaching yourself!

Stop saying "down."

Stop tempting fate

Stop the wedding! There's a traitor in the church!

Stop trying to start trouble.

Stop, thief!

Stop!

Stop! Stop! Monsters are people, too

Strike everything Princess Tiabeanie just said from the record.

Stubborn, prone to violence. No, no, not ringin' a bell at all.

Sure, I guess

Sure, I guess.

Sweet dreams, worker number 124C41.

Sweetie, you're young and beautiful and sandy.

Ta da!

Take a trip through the past, present and future of steam.

Take her away.

Take it off, Bean.

Take me away

Take my daughter back to the dungeon

Take your assigned position. Masks on, hoods up

Take your mommy issues out on someone else

Talk about being sick and depraved!

Tarot cards, my ass! That fortune don't make no sense

Tee hee hee.

Tell me about who you're after.

Tell me what drugs you're on so I know what to do when you pass out.

Tell them we're not worthy

Terrific.

Than any of those pigs back there are as people.

Than, like, right here.

Thank God we found that Zøg look alike

Thank you all for attending this mandatory midnight supper

Thank you! Thank you very much.

Thank you. Now listen

Thank you. That was a little number I call "Shut Up, Elfo" in E flat. Elfo?

Thanks for all this… Um…

Thanks for being my dad, okay?

Thanks for sticking up for me. You're a brave guy.

Thanks for the help!

Thanks to steam and the great Alva Gunderson,

Thanks to you, Sagatha.

Thanks, but I'm not real into drowning.

Thanks, Gordy.

Thanks, Miss Moonpence.

Thanks, Stan, but once again, not a witch.

Thanks, though.

Thanks!

That all the babies in Dreamland memorized

That always solves everything.

That by the time I finish this sentence, there will be no backing out.

That can still be arranged.

That Dad and I are supposed to be dead?

That doesn't matter, Edith.

That I haven't explored, conquered or shot at.

That it just… [whooshes]

That it's all because we trusted that stupid pig. Ow!

That makes no sense. Stupid ball, erase that answer.

That means I've regained the will to live!

That means you're not listening

That one there, in the middle

That really happened, right? With everybody nude?

That roll around on squeaky wheels and try to kill you.

That salami could be anyone.

That there's this thing headed toward Dreamland.

That was amazing.

That was one of mine

That was you, right?

That we're gonna die?

That won't be necessary

That you have to worry about.

That's 'cause I crept up on my little cat feet

That's a nice feature, isn't it?

That's all he does! Talk about being sick and depraved.

That's disgusting.

That's enough, Rhonda!

That's enough, Yugo. You've gotta feed Dagmar her midnight snack

That's enough. Let's stop now, please.

That's gotta be her! Come on.

That's her head, that's her hair, that's her waist, and that's her tail.

That's her heart. So, do you know what a heart is?

That's her quiver and her arrow.

That's her voice coming out of that horn!

That's just lazy sound design

That's just my appearance. I have resting sinister face.

That's my old toothbrush.

That's my specialty. Elfo, you're doing this, too.

That's no monster. That's Sam Buca, the mug thief.

That's not good. Try another three

That's not Pendergast

That's not possible. I mean, look at me.

That's not what I meant.

That's not why we came here

That's one fine lady I wouldn't leave o. [chuckles]

That's right, Big Jo.

That's right. Stan is talking, of course, of the Old Castle Mental Ward.

That's sweet, Bunty, but there's gotta be another way.

That's the final nail in your coffin, sire

That's the lunchtime whistle.

That's the mini golf course that no one goes to anymore, 'cause…

That's the poet who wrote those mean nursery rhymes about you

That's three Ds. That's gotta mean something!

That's what happens when you ask a bonfire to do an ax's job.

That's what I got

That's what I said.

That's what I told you. Oh, look. There she is now

That's what it's called.

That's what Luci once said, but he was high, so I discounted it.

That's where I'm from.

That's why I bit ya. Next time, I might slit ya. Yeah

That's why I remembered his name.

That's why it belongs on the heaviest fathead around

The ancient language of ancients!

The ancient scribblings

The automat

The beautiful and mysterious fortune teller

The beer holders are nice, but honestly,

The best thing to do is play along

The big disappointment? The one who shot you?

The cards, come on. Give me some of that sweet predestination.

The explorers' club

The foes lost but cast a curse

The gun you shot Dad with?

The hell are you talkin' about? I was thinkin' someone more like Snarla.

The journey of a thousand sausages begins with a single breakfast link.

The key to getting dumped is not knowing how to take a hint.

The king!

The kingdom needs to prepare

The last of the prophets and the fulfillment of the prophecy,

The last thing this kingdom needs is more crazy.

The longer I stay on land, the weaker I appear on sea.

The moment has finally come for all to be revealed.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the Elfo.

The noblest way to abandon your family for long stretches of time!

The only mermaid in captivity

The only way Odval and the Archdruidess will let me outta here is if I'm dead

The owl orgy starts in three minutes

The page torn from The Book Of Øgs. You took it?

The pillow goes under his head, not over it

The potion is ready

The princess has a proclamation from King Zøg.

The queen wants me to press them for information.

The real problem is this notch in my left ear.

The reception's that way. The faster you run, the more beer you get.

The rest of you.

The rubes have you cornered, the tower's on fire,

The second one, the guy turned into a pig. Not my fault. Maybe a bit. Whatever.

The Secret Society is gonna kill Zøg

The stepmother I thought was evil is harmless.

The Up A Go Down Wheel? Sure

The wagon wheels are so spooky on the cobblestone!

The walking, talking, happy little elf, Elfo

The wildest sex of your life will have to wait.

Then again, I don't know who the hell's face I'd be throwing it at.

Then do three more cards. About us. About our future

Then I guess you won't be needin' this crown

Then one day, a lonely monk nobody liked was walking near an outcropping.

Then perhaps you can tell me why, for centuries,

Then those four stars that curve up and then that one there?

Then we'll handle this ourselves!

Then what will?

Then who did?

Then who will rule the kingdom?

Then you approved of what she did? She buried my father alive.

Then you must eat them.

Then, get the hell out fast.

Then, I'd have two friends. Counting myself

There are plenty of other fish in the sea.

There he goes.

There I was, trapped on the mountain peak

There is this giant wall of sandwiches.

There she is!

There was a beheading, too. Don't forget the beheading.

There was a lot of drooping and dangling

There you are. In your face.

There you go, bitch. Suck on it!

There's a lot of amusement park vomit in there.

There's a power in Dreamland beyond anything we have here

There's even a division that makes banjo music for blimps!

There's more, lady

There's no other explanation. Bean possesses powerful magic

There's no way I'll see her in this crowd

There's obviously something deeper they've planned all along.

There's one last thing you gotta do to be ready.

There's only one thing left to do…

There's plenty of other heads we could bash in, sire

There's somebody in here. Bean, do what you do best

There's that pig our son seems so attached to!

These are the things that we will look back on at holidays

These two are Numb and Number

They actually used to get everywhere by following really long strings.

They all abandoned you. Just like you abandoned your father.

They can ride around in your pocket, sire.

They can't get to us. [panting] We can take a breather

They didn't have much in the kitchen, but I got you some giant novelty crackers.

They do whatever she tells them,

They get paid in sandwiches

They killed love of my life? [sobs]

They killed Slappo, you know

They obviously don't care what you or anyone thinks

They say she killed a lot of humans with her fish bow.

They say, "Heavy is the head that wears the crown

They tried to get me to talk, and I tried to get them to blink

They want our magic, but we don't have any magic.

They will pay!

They'll never let me live that down.

They're made from the feet of sixteen actual cats

Things have been going great with Trixy, but, um, can I ask you a question?

Think about key moments in your life and see them in new light.

Think you can get people to enlist?

Thinking of something devilishly evil to do

This ain't no poodle. It tastes like Shih Tzu.

This can't be my fate, can it? Please, Edith, show me a card

This could be my chance to nab her good, and get my face painted like a tiger,

This could ruin everything.

This dummy keeps him calm and allows him to express himself

This feels nice.

This from the woman who invaded your dreams?

This here is my new friend, Derek.

This is a coup.

This is a job for a wizard of exceptional power.

This is a vendetta 'cause you're jealous of Denise.

This is all because Alva's after the magic.

This is an express elevator.

This is because these buffoons are the worst backup ever.

This is for all the kids out there who dream of becomin' a king

This is it. I'm running out of air

This is killing the mood, Elfo

This is the hardest thing I'm ever going to do.

This is the sinister plot that just keeps giving

This is usually such a lonely journey

This isn't gonna get more normal any time soon, is it?

This little piggy's had to wee wee wee all the way home. Stand aside.

This means so much to whoever I am.

This meat woman you seek, she could work anywhere.

This must mean the girl, the elf, and the demon are the saviors.

This place has a lot of moving parts, so stick close

This whole thing feels like a weird dream.

This whole thing will turn out fine.

Those are children!

Those are molemen

Those are the angry sandwich makers

Those were his only words

Those were my legs, lady! You could've used a hand signal!

Those were my pet squirrel's last words before he died

Though I have traveled the whole world,

Though I was next in line to be King of Cats, I knew I had to vamoose.

Though I wouldn't want to nurse that splintery wooden mouth!

Though, I did run into Grindl, an old friend of Sorcerio's.

Three cards shall I play, and your fate revealed

Three more cards.

Three, assume most people are out to get you.

Throw him in the dungeon!

Tia, do you think you might stay here?

Tia, this company is gigantic

Tia, you're funny. Where are you from?

Tiabeanie, you know that…

Tiabeanie, your loyalty is admirable.

Time to face the family

To be honest, I'm glad the execution didn't take.

To carouse in the face of all your new religious edicts

To celebrate a truly bizarre whirlwind romance

To Fleebor!

To make you happy. Trust me, I'm not playing mind games with you

To me. To you. To us.

To none other than…

To pick up the man's world and run with it.

To run for your lives in an orderly fashion,

To which a royal personage such as myself is, like, you know, accustomed.

Today, folks. Come on. Pants down, moons up.

Today, you receive a gift from heaven

Tonight is Company Night at Steamland Amusement Park.

Too late, ma'am. Rufus done set the castle on fire

Too slow

Torture chamber? Isn't that cruel?

Touché, mon amour.

Trøgs, the "o" has a slash through it

Trixy, I have something special I want to show Bean.

Trixy! What are you doing here?

Trøgs climb to the surface for our religion.

Trøgs have been excavating for generations.

Trøgs like to go to the surface and forage.

Trøgs, I know what it's like to be you.

True love only has one speed and that is "breakneck."

Tsk tsk

Turbish, fire!

Turbish, scram! [sighs in exasperation]

Turbish!

Turn him over, boys

Twinkletown Insane Asylum. Your new home.

Two more cards.

Two scoops of melted ice cream for you tonight

Two, speak with authority.

Ugh, and swords don't make a shling sound every time you wave 'em around

Ugh, crazy girl.

Ugh, hideous creature

Ugh, I knew it.

Ugh, screw this.

Ugh, she's so bossy.

Ugh, shouldn't you be wallowing in your own filth?

Ugh!

Ugh!

Ugh!

Ugh! Everything is either trying to kill me or kiss me

Ugh! I swear, these tight, sexy clothes

Ugh! Save it for the battlefield, soldier.

Ugh! She got me again.

Ugh! The royal blob's still alive

Ugh! Trixy. What do you want? Can't you see I'm busy?

Ugh! Who is interrupting my insomnia?

Ugh. Don't ever do that again.

Ugh. He's too far away

Ugh. Heartbreak can make you so crazy.

Ugh. I hate hanging out with work people outside work.

Ugh. I wish I could drown

Ugh. Now what?

Ugh. What a scam. Suckering poor saps who believe in destiny

Uh oh

Uh oh

Uh oh!

Uh, excuse me?

Uh, I don't feel any…

Uh, I don't know Speako

Uh, I think he means we have to be vigilant.

Uh, I'm actually Princess Tiabeanie from the mighty kingdom of Dreamland,

Uh, if you wanted help, you should've found Helpo.

Uh, let me see. White hair, purty face,

Uh, like, I've heard of fashion disasters, but you, sir, are a genocide

Uh, my friend gave me a ride most of the way home on her boat

Uh, no, actually, I won't shush!

Uh, pull ups, sir.

Uh, small issue with the boat, but don't worry,

Uh, smut?

Uh, speakin' of starvation, I'm in the mood for several shish kebabs

Uh, tell me exactly what happened with the monster.

Uh, what the hell is this?

Uh, what?

Uh, will there be an orgy?

Uh, wish I could, but my feet are going this way. Sorry, Bean.

Uh, yeah, but, like, quiet, we were talking about me.

Uh, yes, I seem to have, like, been cur sed to perfection

Uh, you can say that again!

Uh…

Uh… Merkimer, my favorite son since my favorite son died.

Um, a country setting.

Um, her little elf friend can speak for himself

Um, I'll be right back.

Um, what?

Um… Hmm.

Um… "All rocking horses must be built to support the huskiest of boys

Underground, where geothermal chambers boil aquifers to enormous pressures.

Unfortunately, Zøg had all of Yøg's bad qualities

Unless she cast a spell on me to make me believe she's a witch.

Unless you took too much drugs, in which case, you are dying.

Until it's no longer necessary.

Until my mail order garden gnome arrived.

Until the monsters get full from eating them and go home

Until then, you mustn't run from reality. And things like booze will not help.

Until this very second. Let's catch up later, though

Up here.

Us?

Usually, one about getting drunk and waking up with another tattoo

Vanquisher of my enemies

Vap, I'll see you in Hell

Wait a minute. She told us she was our savior.

Wait a minute. Turbish and Mertz know the plan. They'll save me

Wait, I know what you're saying.

Wait, it's you! You're just a head.

Wait, no, I didn't.

Wait, Oona, are you going somewhere?

Wait, she did what? I had no idea.

Wait, sorry

Wait, tortured? How?

Wait, you're an actual talking cat?

Wait! I killed most of them. Oh, no!

Wait. Go back. "Deliciousness." There's hope!

Waiting right here

Wallowing is underrated.

Wanna be even more annoyed? I can fit through the bars.

Wanna play a little game called "Like This Whapsee"?

Wanna try again? Everyone's a winner.

Warning, she appears to be in a bit of a mood

Was to be the grand beginning for our secret society.

Watch his hands, watch his sleeves,

Watch his pockets, and watch your watch while you're at it

Watch the dealer

We are gathered here today

We better stock up on food and beverages

We can dispose of him now

We can't have that moonhole

We can't know what's going on in Merkimer's heart.

We come here when we're struggling with negative thoughts.

We could use your father's never fail tactic

We did it! We got them all!

We died when we fell off the cliff

We do declare Dreamland is now a theocracy!"

We don't even have reggae. But, please, you gotta believe me!

We don't have an ogre alarm, Your Majesty

We don't have time for you to wallow.

We don't know if it's an army or a monster or a storm, or what.

We don't wanna kill ya, we just wanna burn ya some

We don't want that, do we?

We got ourselves a runner!

We gotta cover up those pointy ears, dude

We gotta get outta here. Odval could be back any second.

We gotta go back and get her out of her tank

We gotta leave him somewhere safe

We had, like, a banter! We bonded!

We have another cave we excavated for rock storage.

We have time now. World domination can wait

We have to get back down to the line!

We have to start working together. But I need you to help me help you.

We hope you had a… blast?

We just came to tell you that everyone was waiting for you at the party.

We keep aiming at seagulls and missing.

We must gather again to set our plan in motion

We must inform the Secret Society of Tiabeanie's return.

We must shadow the shadow organization so that we can learn their plan.

We need bravery. We need a brilliant strategy.

We need to close the deal with your parents now.

We need to talk. Does he have to be here?

We only have 12 arrows left.

We should hasten his demise, just as we did with his brother

We should start a gang and kick Elfo out. We can call it "Luci and Friend."

We told you so! We told you so! We told you so!

We use them for structural reinforcement, building insulation,

We were on this beach and, like,

We wouldn't be in this dungeon

We'd never let something happen to our headless friend Pendergast.

We'll keep it up until the whole world is hollow.

We'll need our best horses.

We'll never know

We'll never know

We'll never know

We'll roam the countryside, performing for farmers by day,

We'll see about that!

We'll split up to most efficiently gather the remaining items.

We'll take it in a bag, please

We'll teach you how to be a big, manly marshmallow.

We're all ashamed of some flaw we can't change.

We're being invaded, everyone wants to kill us,

We're fooling him so good

We're headed back to Dreamland. You want a ride?

We're not freaky little molemen. We're beautiful, bug eyed Trøgs

We're one step away from happily ever after.

We're wasting time, and drinks are really expensive in this place.

We're working well together getting the kingdom prepared.

We've barely time to put this affair in motion

We've been driving for hours and you haven't offered me a drink,

We've brought regular gumballs, and suicide gumballs,

We've got arrows!

We've never been attacked by ogres before

Weird. I feel like I've been here before.

Weird. Why is Odval being so friendly?

Welcome to all seekers of the secret and welcome, new members

Welcome to Dirk's Dirks. I'm Henry

Welcome to my one man revolution.

Welcome to Steamland

Welcome to the fanciest freak show on Pier 33!

Welcome, gentlemen

Welcome, stoners. We worship the Moon. They say when it's at its highest

Well, at least I don't have a small waist and long legs! [sighs]

Well, at least they gave us our own room.

Well, come in, come in

Well, comin' right up!

Well, good news is you are clearly over your heartbreak.

Well, I do have the world's deadliest scorpion.

Well, I don't wanna get into it,

Well, I get enlightenment from my weed.

Well, I haven't been.

Well, I simply must be going.

Well, I want this to be a progressive kingdom,

Well, I'm gonna knife you in your throat

Well, I'm not gonna miss you, Mom

Well, it depends on the context.

Well, it had jewels and, you know, cat stuff. [laughs]

Well, it's only my most fondest wish

Well, no makeup could cover up those freckles, darling, so…

Well, no one's ever asked before

Well, not bathe

Well, now that you mention it…

Well, obviously, he's not here. You gotta work on your listening skills.

Well, okay, then, let's have a wedding!

Well, she has to know

Well, she's gone forever.

Well, that sounds like you.

Well, that's no angel. It's a seagull on fire

Well, the bigmouth princess has a soothing influence over him.

Well, then, consider me your number one enemy.

Well, this has been a waste of time

Well, those are mixed messages.

Well, Trøgs are creatures of habit. They know when it's time to sleep

Well, we got tunnels everywhere. Including the walls of your castle.

Well, what about me? I don't wanna stay in Dreamland.

Well, where is Pendergast now?

Well, wherever you grew up, you sure didn't learn about fear.

Well, yes.

Well, you look rich. Maybe we can work somethin' out

Well, you've still got brain goo on your mouth

Welp, it can't be much worse than this

Were designed to cut off cognitive thinking.

Weren't we supposed to meet someone right about now?

Wha… But I'm sure I saw

Whaddaya doin'?

Whaddaya doin'? You're just gonna leave me in here?

What a lovely couple.

What a sick bastard.

What a surprise!

What about me?

What about my needs?

What about that button over there?

What about the curse? Can you get Merkimer back into his body?

What about you, mister?

What are these frilly dresses doing in my liquor cabinet?

What are we going to do? We have no king to protect us.

What are ya, blind?

What are you doing here, Mom? Why can't you just leave me alone?

What are you doing up on that pole?

What are you looking at? Start walkin'! Come on, move it!

What are you talking about?

What are you, some kinda wizard?

What are you, the rock police? I put 'em up my ass. How's that?

What did I tell you?

What did you just call me?

What did you just do, Bean?

What did you mean by that?

What do we do to prepare for an incoming cloud of green smoke?

What do we do, Detective Tiabeanie?

What do you call those, boy?

What do you mean? The pig or our son?

What do you say we hug it out and head downstairs?

What do you think that sack is filled with?

What do you think?

What else can I go to Hell for?

What happened?

What happened? We burnt them at the stake,

What if we get up high on that wheelie thing?

What is that, a foot bone?

What is that? A large ape and an unfinished man?

What is this stuff?

What just happened?

What kind of weird fog is this?

What say you, Father?

What say you, Princess?

What shall we do, Your Majesty?

What should we do with the sexy impostor?

What sound?

What the hell happened to Prince Derek?

What the hell is that weird green smoke?

What the hell is Trøgs?

What the hell, Merkimer? Now you're kicking pigs?

What the hell?

What the hell? This crown can suck it.

What the… [grunts]

What the… You're not my royal kitty cat!

What the… [gasps]

What took you so long?

What was Pendergast supposed to help my dad do?

What you say has the ring of truth.

What, no hug?

What, they think that I'm gonna go back to my bedroom and cry?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What? I thought that we were buds, you know?

What? No! No way in hell. I'm not doin' it.

What? They can still hear me?

What? Why are you laughing?

What'd you think?

What're you doin' out here?

What're you talkin' about, ya numbnuts?

What's happening? Where is this bookcase taking us?

What's that rushing water sound?

What's wrong, Elfo?

What's your prognosis, Sorcerio?

Whatever did you do?

Whatever you got

Whee!

Wheel me outta town, go get Turbish and Mertz,

When his remains were found,

When I die, do not resuscitate.

When I got your message to come here,

When I opened that locker and Pendergast's body fell forward,

When I say "queen," you say "Bean."

When I wake up, it's even worse.

When I was a scared little boy hiding under my bed…"

When it came to an end, I wanted to die.

When it pays off!

When you buried me in sand and left Porky and me for dead.

When you were little, I tried to poison your father,

When you've delivered Bean's message, pull the rope twice

Where am I?

Where are you going?

Where are you trying to be from? I'm sorry, I can't place that accent

Where did I go?

Where did you get all those coins?

Where did you put the rock you excavated from that cave?

Where is Elfo? We want him now!

Where is the little bastard?

Where you can't breathe or move or scratch

Where you going, Deserto?

Where'd he go? Anyway, here's the plan

Where's Big Boy Merkimer?

Where's Elfo?

Where's the gun?

Which actually is now the Found City of Cremorrah since I was there, I suppose.

Which I never have the opportunity to do back on the farm.

Which I will use if I have to, but I don't want to.

Which she was supposed to keep receipts for.

Which was a step up, by the way.

Which would make her a witch.

While I'm just sitting around with a bunch of spooky weirdos

While some of the plot seems like they're thinking of it on the fly,

Who brings you soup when you're sick, and ice cream when you're lazy,

Who did that?

Who did that?

Who gives you that special tingle.

Who hang on my every word.

Who in the world is making that god awful noise?

Who killed Pendergast?

Who never finished anything in her life other than a pint of beer

Who said that?

Who the hell is Missy?

Who you are is a nobody, and what you are ain't nothin'!

Who's gonna be accused of being a witch next, Daddy?

Who's that lurking in the dark alley?

Who's there to cheer you on, who makes you laugh,

Who's up for some Trøggy style?

Who's up there?

Whoa, again!

Whoa, I'm finally hearing voices outside of my head.

Whoa, I'm seeing my life flash before my eyes. [gasps] Am I dying?

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa! [breathing heavily]

Whoa! I mean… Hi. Odval.

Whoa! This is big. I really need some time to drink about this.

Whoa. There's no slobber in a good lobing, okay?

Whoa. This morning I wanted to die and now, not so much.

Whoa. You two look like you need a drink

Whoo!

Why are they angry?

Why are you still here? The mob went that way.

Why are you trying to kill me? Why is it so dark?

Why are you wearing just one boot?

Why can't I be arbitrary, too? I'm king

Why did we stop?

Why do they have scenes like this that don't move the story along?

Why don't I just swim you guys back to Dreamland?

Why don't you just stop gasping and change the law?

Why don't you make a wish, darling?

Why don't you take Elfo to the Lover's Gravel Pit?

Why is a chunk torn out? "Cursed"? Oh, no.

Why is it that every time you're braiding my hair

Why would they lock you up? You're puny and irritating just like them

Why, hello, sire. How are you feeling?

Why, I introduced them to each other and officiated at their wedding!

Why, I was just gliding about,

Why, I'll have you know, there's not a single corner of this world

Why, that's it!

Why, the effrontery! Sir, I lay you a club challenge.

Why?

Why? What did Elfo ever do to you?

Why'd you come back for me?

Why's everything gettin' dinkier?

Will he scream when he's shot?

Wish I could, but I can't.

With Derek out at sea, no one.

With gravy? [honks]

With his moonlight slappin' on the bum bum.

With the aid of the Secret Society.

With the fops and dandies and the merchant class.

With the stupidity of someone expecting to learn at a carnival.

With your brains and my beauty, what a twosome we could've been.

With your underwater sex fantasies

Without ever getting the fun relationship part!

Without having to kill someone.

Without this gun, Odval won't be able to shoot anybody else.

Woah! As much as I'm annoyed with Bunty,

Woah! Woah! Woah!

Woe is me.

Worse, I'm lovesick.

Would you mind wiping off my drool?

Wow

Wow

Wow

Wow, Mom, I don't know if you mean any of that,

Wow, okay.

Wow, Oona, you're so wise.

Wow, you really have a type, huh?

Wow! Listen to Zøg's laughter

Wow! That's beautiful.

Wow! This malnutrition is really slimming.

Wow. Brutal honesty. That's true friendship.

Wow. I've never been heartbroken like that.

Wow. Whistles control you.

Wow. You made 'em even madder.

Ya got pulled pork?

Yeah, "put on

Yeah, but a few scars and a tattoo of a naked me,

Yeah, finally settling my bar tab.

Yeah, I can see that. So, what we do now?

Yeah, I know what you're saying.

Yeah, I know. Thanks, Bunty.

Yeah, I promised I wasn't gonna hit ya

Yeah, I still don't know what those words mean

Yeah, I wasn't sobbing. I was sniffling.

Yeah, it's your favorite soup. Melted butter.

Yeah, Luci, I'm his chump now. Get outta here!

Yeah, maybe I do. Ciao

Yeah, no, thanks.

Yeah, nothing except your freaky little molemen

Yeah, park it, old timer. You might wanna take some notes.

Yeah, probably, but please stop making eye contact in the meantime.

Yeah, samesies.

Yeah, that was a shocker. You and your dad have such big, fat heads.

Yeah, that's it.

Yeah, the one place that has lights. Steamland.

Yeah, this isn't helping, is it?

Yeah, um, that's kinda what I was going for

Yeah, well, that's how we get mugs.

Yeah, well, the throne room isn't usually such a disaster,

Yeah, well, this one shot Pendergast. With a gun.

Yeah, yeah, shut up about the feet.

Yeah, you should slump

Yeah, you were always good at stickin' to things.

Yeah, you're gonna die soon.

Yeah!

Yeah? Yeah?

Yeah.

Yeah. [slurps]

Yeah. [slurps]

Yeah. And once I sprinkle it with glitter, you'll look like a right badass.

Yeah. Dreams fulfilled.

Yeah. I suppose I don't need it. Huh

Yeesh, I haven't seen him this upset since we burned his birthday clown

Yeesh. I didn't order a king

Yes

Yes

Yes, but I can never have children now.

Yes, corned beef. Lots and lots of corned beef.

Yes, darling.

Yes, I could.

Yes, I do

Yes, I get that a lot.

Yes, I get that a lot.

Yes, I understand subtext.

Yes, Ma, I did wash my taint

Yes, my son. When it's at its highest, we Trøgs gain our special powers.

Yes, of course, Princess. We will treat Zøg with our utmost respect.

Yes, of course.

Yes, please, Luci, go bother Stan in the dungeon or something.

Yes, sire!

Yes, that place creeps even me out.

Yes, yes…

Yes!

Yes!

Yes! Oh.

Yes.

Yes. And I bring lovely wedding gift for new bride.

Yes. I, too, must be going, for I…

Yikes

Yoo hoo! [echoing]

You act angry on the outside,

You add a touch of class to our humble, yokel infested country.

You are dismissed.

You are tied up like giant, sweaty rump roast.

You brought the ogres here.

You call it magic, but really, it's simply natural phenomena we don't yet understand

You can bother me again when I grow a new heart.

You can do what I think you're doing later.

You can forget about those, too!

You can take that with you if you'd like.

You can talk?

You can't be gone, Dad. I need you. Here

You can't be out here in the streets like this… All that riffraff… [mumbling]

You can't be self conscious just because people gawk at you every day.

You can't even keep track of your boots.

You can't just steal mugs from an established place.

You can't make me. Not a chance. [purring]

You clearly are. [shakily] Ow!

You come to me

You compound my sorrow with those nauseating cheeseballs.

You could be my new friend, since my dad is so sick he grew tusks

You dare ask for ball chain y things

You did it. And you got your pants back, too.

You didn't get us into this, Bean.

You didn't say anything about being locked in the dungeon.

You do like it, right? No, you hate it, don't you?

You do not get to talk about my dad.

You do not wanna go in there, unless you're a fan of, like, dying

You do? You surprise me, me

You don't have to die at home, but you can't die here. Now beat it!

You don't need that little pink squealer. You can ask his parents yourself.

You ever get the feeling your life is going nowhere, Darrell?

You ever had a, uh, Scruffles sandwich?

You failed as an actress and as a daughter,

You got a visitor, bub.

You got it, bub.

You gotta be protectin' the castle against that green smoke that's coming

You gotta hide yourself right now, dude.

You gotta make sure people don't go hungry! [grunts]

You gotta play this, pally

You guessed it, Oona!

You guys are terrible neighbors and you cook all that smelly cabbage

You guys really need a swim up bar.

You have a duty to protect the entire kingdom,

You have a toxic personality, so just go your way and I'll go mine

You have an impressive number of enemies for a girl your age.

You have pockets in your fins?

You have the worst luck I've ever seen

You have to come closer 'cause I don't want people to panic.

You heard him. We need weapons.

You heard me correctly. The king is bediapered.

You hug him this time.

You knew this was coming

You know how to keep your mouth shut, don't you?

You know I don't like to wait. But you do know what I like

You know it's just a good excuse to dispose of all the weirdos

You know the story.

You know what really freaks me out?

You know what would be really ever so fun?

You know what, Elfo? I don't like you.

You know what, Mom? I used to love you, but it was all in my head

You know what? Forget it. I just want to get out of here

You know what? I'm gonna call you Beamon.

You know what? It doesn't really matter, Oona, okay?

You know what? That is none of your business.

You know what? You're making me tired

You know, Dad, a lot of people think you're beyond repair

You know, I have seen a lot of freak show romances,

You know, it's a shame it had to end up this way

You know, just that there's some curse on our family

You know, Merkimer? I have dreamed of this day all my life

You know, we'd maybe share the throne? Huh?

You look confused 'cause you grow stuff back all the time,

You look in the mirror every mornin', don't you? [laughs]

You made only one steam whistle, and this is it.

You made sure they're in my handwriting?

You may not have gotten any money, you may not have gotten any weapons.

You mean anyone but Sorcerio

You mean I'm trapped as a useless pig forever?

You mean steal?

You missed the exciting Sabre Dance accident

You must believe me. I'd never approve

You must remember that women, or womanish variants,

You must've been desperate to take a ride from a human.

You nail me into the coffin, you tell everybody I died,

You need to save your saviors so we can save you later!

You pardoned me for that. No backsies.

You realize I'm not a talking cat, right? I'm a talking demon

You realize what this means?

You really wanna know what's important in a siege?

You said your name was Trevor! [grunts]

You say your wish into the spirit rock and then you throw it.

You should crank out a few more before the lunch whistle blows

You shouldn't have come back. I'm queen now.

You tell me I'm going to die?

You think you're better than me? Oh.

You think?

You thought the reflection was a little water girl

You took four times the amount I did, so there is nothing left.

You two do whatever you want, but I'm not abandoning Missy.

You two, this way to the sleep chambers

You unleash one evil queen on a kingdom and that's, like, all you've ever done.

You used to love to stare into the pond

You wanna know the most important thing in preparing for a potential attack?

You want a dozen of our sharpest dirks to murder some people with?

You want we should put him in the bilge with the other kings?

You were a baby, but now you're a man, baby.

You were having a nightmare. A bad one.

You were my greatest gift. You realize, you're all I have

You were right

You, scrivener.

You'd think with all the brains I eat, I wouldn't be so forgetful

You'll be at each other's throats in a week

You'll be my dream geezer.

You'll know what to do. You are more capable than you don't think.

You're a better person as a pig

You're a bloodthirsty bastard

You're a disappointment of a daughter

You're a sociopath

You're afraid to let people in and you hide behind sarcasm.

You're beautiful

You're even more beautiful, and bejeweled, than I imagined

You're fired. Security!

You're just gonna be in this little box for all eternity,

You're late, Trixy. Were you with that possum again?

You're my little spoon

You're next, Turbish!

You're not getting away this time, you trouser taker!

You're not gonna drown me, are you?

You're not gonna say nothin'?

You're not telling me where, are you?

You're not the boss of me [groans]

You're now my closest ally…

You're on, baby

You're right! I am badass! [grunting]

You're so weird

You're the Bean

You're the most pathetic scum

You're too trusting

You're welcome, ma'am.

You're writing that right now.

You're, um, like, petting my eye. Yeesh!

You've been doin' it this whole time

You've had a long day at the stake

You've returned.

Young lady, it had nothing to do with our fabulous wealth,

Young, wide eyed mermaid sets out from home,

Your attention, please! Derek has a mustache now!

Your crimes are forgiven.

Your favorite kid? The drunken one?

Your friend Bean wanted money. Now, she'll drown in it.

Your friends will all leave you in the end

Your giant head holes are relatively tiny

Your kind gets table scraps

Your Majesty, I crave an audience. Put down the dolls

Your Majesty, so nice to have company

Your proof?

Your revolutionary Highnesses.

Your stupid, rude, yelling face was always there.

Your whisky sour, sir

Zippidee, Doo Dah, barrelize him!

Zøg did it.

Zøg is 100%, scientifically, medically bonkers

Zøg was left for dead with a hole in his chest.

Zøg!

Zøg's too crazy to remember anything we did to him.

Zøggy, don't go nowhere. I be back.

Zøggy, I'm so proud our little boy is marrying anything.

13 cents!

"Disruption"? [yells]

"Doom. Despair." And "Death." "Doom. Despair. Death

"Dread. Dismay. Damnation." "Dread. Dismay." And "Damnation

"Sambuca"? No, Sam Buca.

[all exclaim] What?

[all gasp] [monocle splashes]

[all gasping] What?

[all grunt] [snickers]

[all laugh] Learn? From you?

[all] Hi, I'm Elfo

[Alva] …both our kingdoms will prosper… [sighs]

[babbling] Zøggy!

[babbling] Zøggy.

[Bean grunts] [whimpers]

[Bean laughing] Whoa! [man 2] Our journey begins here,

[Bean panting] [Luci gibbers]

[Bean yelps] [Elfo laughs]

[Bean] Dad! Dad! [Oona] Zøggy!

[Bean] Oh, Mom, thank you! You're hugging me

[Bean] That stupid pig is our friend. [Elfo] Ow!

[Bean] You think? [all gasp]

[bell dings] [steam whistle blows]

[bell dings] [steam whistle blows]

[bell tolling] [gasps] It is midnight!

[both exclaim] [water splashing]

[both laughing] [laughs sarcastically]

[both] Ah! [water splashes]

[brakes squealing] [man] Ow

[breathing heavily] Hi. Hey

[bubble pops] Ooh, he's a big one. What's his story?

[buzzes] It's a quarter slot, you rube!

[cat yowls] [Luci grunting]

[chains rattling] [gasps]

[chuckles] You don't got to whisper, my man!

[chuckles] Boing, boing. [door shuts]

[chuckling] Ow!

[clanging] Help! Help us! Somebody, help! Help us!

[clanking continues] [Elfo grunts] Damn it!

[clattering] [Elfo] Ow!

[coffin thuds] [Zøg] Hey!

[continues babbling] Shh.

[crowd cheers] [upbeat harpsichord music playing]

[crowd gasping] [engine turning over]

[crunching] Ow! She bit me!

[Dagmar moaning] [grunting]

[Dagmar] Bean's the worst. Bean's the worst

[Derek] What's "impertinent" mean? [both gasp]

[dings] There you go

[door closes] Hiya, Elfo!

[door opens] [gasps]

[door opens] [Zøg snoring]

[door slams] Huh.

[doorbell ringing] [gasps]

[dramatic music playing] [all grunting]

[dramatic music playing] [ogres grunting]

[Edith] Ooh, that's even worse. Jeez, a lot of Ds.

[electricity crackling] Ow! What the hell, ball?

[Elfo grunts] [water splashes]

[Elfo whispering] Shut up, Trixy. [Luci] Shut up, Elfo!

[Elfo yelps] [Bean laughs]

[Elfo] Cave juice? [seductively] Mmm

[Elfo] Is that true? No.

[Elfo] Um, who is it? It's Bean. Let me in. I need your help!

[engine revving] [crowd exclaiming]

[exclaiming] [wizard exclaims]

[faintly] Seconds from now What?

[faintly] Seconds from now What?

[flesh squelching] That's disgusting.

[gasping] She's lying

[gasps] [baby wailing]

[gasps] [cackling]

[gasps] [Elfo and Luci grunt]

[gasps] [melody playing]

[gasps] [Odval] What happened to all the knives?

[gasps] Mora! Wait, Bean! Who's Mora?

[groaning] [door opens]

[groaning] What? You… [Odval] See? There's his death mutter

[groans] [Mora] Tough luck, kid

[groans] And you two, scoot.

[groans] Uh oh

[growls] [yelps]

[grunting] [dramatic music playing]

[grunts] [Alva] You can't outrun the future, Bean

[grunts] [Craig] Ow!

[grunts] [thud]

[grunts] [yelps]

[grunts] Hold on, let me finish, dumbass!

[grunts] Let me go, bub.

[grunts] Oh, okay

[grunts] See, ain't that nice?

[grunts] What the…

[guards exclaim] Up here!

[gunshot] [laughs mockingly] Missed me!

[gunshot] Ow.

[honking] Quiet! That's enough!

[honks] Oh, no.

[honks] Ugh. I need nap

[honks] You got it!

[in normal voice] Dad? "Dad"?

[in normal voice] Meeting adjourned. [all muttering]

[indistinct chatter] [carnival music playing]

[indistinct chatter] [Luci yelling] Line up, losers!

[indistinct chatter] I don't know yet.

[kisses] [Zøg continues babbling]

[laughs] [Bean groans]

[loud crash] [Bean screams]

[Luci grunts] That's for calling me "tater dude

[Luci] Noice! [all cheering]

[Luci] Ooh

[Luci] Sorry, this seat is taken. [Elfo] Shut up.

[Luci] Uh, Bean? [Bean] Who's with the queen?

[man 1] What's with the garden gnome? [man 2] Hey, lady, your kid's a freak!

[man loudly] Not the stool! [monster screeching]

[man yelps] [people gasp]

[man] Liar! [all gasp]

[man] Put it on! [crowd claps]

[melody playing] [grunts]

[Mertz] We got him. [Turbish] We caught the monster.

[metal clangs] Thank you

[metal clanks] [Elfo] Ow!

[metal globe clanking and banging] [Elfo groaning and moaning]

[monster grunts] [glass shatters]

[Mora gasps] [Bean grunting]

[Mora] Whoo! [all] Whoo!

[mouse shrieks] Hmm. Ah.

[panting] [door opens]

[scoffs] Announcing the unexpected return

[scoffs] Please bring Dad and Bean back

[screaming] You better run!

[screams] [laughs]

[screams] [thud]

[shrieking] [crowd gasping]

[sighs] [Oona] Vello again.

[slaps] I deserve that

[slaps] Ow!

[slaps] Ow!

[snaps fingers] [bell tolling]

[sniffs] Hmm. [door closes]

[snoring] [music box creaking and winding]

[snoring] What the hell?

[softly] How was that, Bean? B+

[steam whooshes] [Bean coughs]

[sword swishing] Ugh, there it goes again

[thud] [groan]

[thud] [honks]

[thud] [human Merkimer] Quite sad.

[thud] [Luci] Ow!

[thud] [Turbish] Ow, Odval.

[thuds] [Elfo] Ow! That was too hard.

[thunder cracks] [exclaims] Turbish! You scared me!

[thunder cracks] Oh, God! Oona, you scared me.

[tires screech] [woman] Hop on, hot stuff.

[toddlers laughing] See?

[Trøgs] Welcome, friends

[Trixy moans] Oh.

[Trøgs] Welcome, saviors. [Bean] Saviors?

[Turbish] Hi, friend. Hi, Turbish

[Turbish] Hi, Odval

[unenthusiastic clapping] [man 1] Yay

[upbeat music playing] [indistinct chatter]

[water bubbling] [screams]

[water splashes] [gasps]

[water splashes] Hey!

[wheels screech] [all grunt]

[whispering] Say something

[whispers] And for fun. [whimpers]

[whistles] Comin' through! Where do you put the rocks you excavate?

[yelps] Gotcha!

[yelps] No, no, no

[Zøg grunts] [grunting]

[Zøg honking] [Bean] Uh oh.

[Zøg honking] And listen.

[Zøg] There gonna be meatballs? [Oona] Stop talking about meat.

Ah! Hi, I'm Chazzzzz.

All I have is nightmares now. That's rough, I tells ya.

All right

And here we are. Where are we?

And that is? Someone who works here.

And there's the gun. [Bean] The gun?

And… And two little nobodies

Are you married to Denise? Yeah.

Aw

Away, it seems

Backstabbing. [all gasp]

Bean, help! Odval, stop!

Bean! Elfo!

Bean's the worst. Bean is the worst

Beer? No!

Buca? Yeah.

But perhaps your little elf friend… [chuckles]

But please listen. If we work together… [Bean grunts]

But then why is it not leading to dating? I don't know.

But you can't just stay down here. Sure, he can. Let's go.

But you're the leader of the church. Church, shmurch

Bye, Freckles! Hmm.

Bye. [Turbish] Bye.

Can I order in? You'll have to

Close enough. What a jerk. Big jerk

Closer. Hmm

Closer. Hmm?

Come closer. Okay

Come on, boy, what's your catchphrase? Uh uh

Come on, Dad. Let's go. [groans]

Dad? [honks]

Denise says hi. What?

Destiny denier! Prophecy hag!

Did the mermaid hunters get ya? No.

Did you know that I shot Dad? Everybody knows that

Did you shuffle the deck? Elfo, look.

Do I? Do I?

Do they? A little bit.

Doink

Don't you wanna earn your cracker? Mmm mmm

Drink from mugs? Yeah, that you stole.

Elf diddler! Skull sucker!

Elfo, there's nothing there! I have to see for myself

Elfo, this way! [yelps]

Elfo? Yeah?

Elfo. What? Ow!

Even under pain of torture? Sure, I guess

Ew! Oh, don't play dainty with me.

Excuse me! Pardon me! One side! [exclaiming]

First of all, do you have any more drugs? No, greedy.

Flick

Flick! [gulps]

Flick. [gulps]

Goddamn you. Let's go!

Gordy! Gordy, focus. Sorry.

Green door. Screen door.

Greetings, ragamuffins! May I play? Sure

hack him into little pieces

Have it your way, fat arse

He even laughs at the setups! [sighs heavily]

He's a teeny, little green elf Got it!

He's green Got it!

Help! Help! Where you takin' me? [thunder rumbling]

Hey, Edith? Yeah?

Hey, girlie! Yow!

Hey, Mora! [Mora] Oh, Elfo!

Hey, where's Mora? I don't know.

Hi, Elfo. Hi, Trixy. I mean, what the hell?

Hmm, I'm sensing a pattern here. Ow! Ow!

Hmm. [hollow clunking]

Hmm. Hmm. Cutting from quote,

Hold hands. [Luci grunts]

Hold on… What?

How dare you, Bean! How dare you, Bean!

How do I look? Like a wealthy potbelly stove

How do you do? [Gordy] How do you do?

Huh? She only responds to quarters

I don't care. Make her disappear forever. [both yell]

I don't sound like that. I don't sound like that

I have a poster? Here, stick your foot out.

I hope he's okay. Yeah, I'm sure he is.

I know we've had our differences. We tried to kill each other

I mean, wink. [sighs]

I need some advice. We're your advisors

I really do love you. Then set me free

I really gotta pee. [door closes]

I'm alive

I'm friends with her

I'm not jealous of getting hit. Ow!

I'm not sure how this is helping. They're just being really hurtful

I'm not. I'm angry. [Elfo] Hmm

I'm so alone. [door closes]

I've gotta go. Well, I'm… Yeah, you should go

Is hiding a weapon? No.

Is hiding bravery? No.

It better not be a shell bracelet. [Mora] It isn't

It's a freakin' shling party. Ugh

It's a stupid law. [all gasp]

It's getting dark

It's Leavo. Leavo?

It's me

It's not funny. Just picture it.

It's Zøg! [continues babbling]

Just do it! [scoffs]

Just scoot your You clearly are. Ow!

Leg of chicken? Whole chickens

Like this. Whap! See? Ow

Listen, I dig you [Elfo] Another D.

Lots of chickens… Yes, many chickens

Luci! I'm on it.

Man, I know you know what to do. [moans]

me. [whispering] What?

Merkimer? [grunts]

Miss Moonpence. Yes, Minister?

Mmm. Leg of mutton, huh? Well, all right. Leg of mutton

Moon

My God! Oona, you're relentless. Thank you.

My hunch was right! It's The thing!

Never! He's hiding in the Fun Maze!

No one ever misses me. That's not true.

No way. She's here? Right this way.

No, I want to talk to my father. I wouldn't advise that

No, no, no more honking. [Zøg honks]

No, you're Bean. Who's Bean? I'm Dagmar

No! [steam hisses]

No! [Trøgs grunting]

No. Definitely not

Not a chance in hell

Not… Yeah. Okay, fine. Okay, fine.

Now, all we need is weapons. [coughs]

Now! [exclaims]

Off, that was a long night. Hey

Oh, and a new army. What?

Oh, and you don't? No, I don't.

Oh, Bean

Oh, Boss. What the…

Oh, Elfo. [Elfo] Ow!

Oh, hello, Princess! Bunty!

Oh, here we go. What?

Oh, my God, you're on fire! Okay… [screeching]

Oh, nothing. Just Elfo's a little jerk. You're a little jerk.

Oh, so it's safe? No, there's a lot of cave ins

Oh, still one person. Let's stop. [Turbish clapping]

Oh, that old thing

Oh, that's good. Right there

Oh, think so? Indubitably.

Oh! Duck! Duck!

Oh! Thank you so much. None of it, sir

Oh. Turbish, get over here. Yes, dear

Okay, that's enough. Settle down

Okay! Luci, you can chaperone

Okay. You can leave now. Thanks, guys

Ooh! [honks]

Ooh! [honks]

Ooh! [honks]

Ooh! Whoa!

Ooh! Lookie, a black kitty cat. I told you, I'm not a cat!

Oona? Bean?

Or fit to lead. Ooh! Or equipped to lead.

Ow! [chuckles]

Ow! [laughs and gasps]

Ow! [laughs]

Ow! Have some dignity, man! This won't do!

Ow! I learned that

Ow! Sorry, Craig!

Please understand… [all yelping]

Plus, I've been real busy. Don't spare my feelings

Quiet, mule. Hyah! Ah!

Quite so. [burps]

Really? Really

Ridiculous accent. You're the Bean

Right, you can stop. Aw

Say hello to the nice people, Elfo. Nope

Says he's a prince. No way.

Scoot away. No, I was here first. Ow!

Scram! Ooh!

Shaddup! No!

So my act is still okay? You know what I think's funny?

So, where have you been? Away.

Someone better guard him all night. [Turbish] Turbish will do it

Somewhere inside you… Mmm…

Sorry. Sorry. Sorry

Stay back, Rufus! [groans]

Ta da! [all gasping]

Talent? No, legs.

Tenderloin? Tenderloin, yes. Top sirloin

Thank you, Elfo

That ain't good. Ow!

That imitation is terrible. Oh, you're terrible

That sounds dangerous. No, "inn" as in "hotel

That's painfully accurate! [boys laugh]

That's right, slap that bum bum

The chubby fellow who escorted you? Oh, yes.

The creepy one? Yes.

The kingdom needs You think ignoring me makes me go away,

The one that never stops barking? That's the one, son. That's the one

The very thing! Exactly.

The very, very thing. Shut up!

The whatest what of my what? Let's go.

There'll be pulled pork, yes. Pulled pork is good

There's nothing more satisfying. Or arousing

This is your garbage hole? No, this is our treasury cave.

This way to the cave inn

Tie her up. Yeah, yeah, yeah

Turbish! [Turbish] Sorry.

Ugh! Ooh!

Um, don't you guys eat? Oh, we have our own special diet

Unbelievable

until you do

Wait a minute. [Turbish] Oh!

Wait, all of them? Uh, yeah, sure.

Wait, that's it! Don't hit me.

We can stroll together. [both groan]

We gotta get out of here fast

We'll return him to throne room. All right.

We're safe up here. There's no way out. Phew!

Well, he's a teeny, little guy Got it!

Were you in my bedroom just now? [gasps]

What are they doing? They're thinking.

What exactly are you offering here? Definitely not your job back

What happened to your appetite? I'm allergic to pandering

What is all this stuff? Anchovies with vinegar and mustard

What the [all exclaiming]

What took you so long? [grunts]

What? Are you calling me a liar?

What? Your catchphrase.

What? But I thought… You thought wrong.

What's that noise? Coppers! Skedeedle!

What's the difference? [laughs]

What's your name? Sam Buca.

Who's Turbish? The bane of my existence.

Whoo hoo! Whoa!

Why, you got any money? Well, not anymore

Wink. [sighs]

Wink. [sighs]

Yeah, you don't steal mugs. Look, I

Yeah? Oh, sorry, did I wake you?

Yes? Come closer!

You bring us anything? No.

You could go easier on the mayonnaise. [screams]

You got it. All right, then

You gotta come closer, though. All right

You have, dear. [yelping]

You mean I know what I said.

You promise? Yeah!

You really do? Uh huh

You Tiabeanie? Yeah

You two stay here and guard the body. Yes, ma'am.

You went to wizarding school together? More of a wizarding community college.

You were simply told to lure her here. And I delivered what you wanted.

You'd never understand. Try me.

You're here still

You're kinda slow on the uptake, Bean. Hey, I understand drinks.

You're not? You're not?

You've been so honest with me. Totally honest.

Zip it, Edith. Yeah, Edith.

…along with this food and those chess pieces you ate yesterday,

'Cause down there I realized important stuff I wasn't aware of before.

'Cause I let my friend Elfo die and where do you go when you die?

'Cause you do.

'Course you'll have to wait for your victim's birthday

'Sup, tater dude?

'Tis a monster

'Tis far too much excitement for folk like us.

'Tis well nigh impossible!

"…just like you are probably right now. Love, yer dad."

"A Secret History of the Kings of Dreamland."

"A statue shall be erected in honor of my dear sister Bean,

"Agogg, Dreamland's first king."

"All executed shall endow their clothing to Odval or the Archdruidess,

"All power emanates from this Holy Throne and the ass therein ensconced!"

"And a socialist utopia shall be established that will "

"At midnight, I must go to the basement and enter the green door."

"Bøg the Paranoid." "Died alone, surrounded by enemies."

"But maybe it is!"

"But where does steam come from?" you ask,

"Crøg the Conspicuous." Yow.

"Decapitation"? [chuckles nervously]

"Desire

"Devastation, Danger, Destruction, Darkness, Dummy, Disenchantment,

"Devotion." Ooh. That's a good one.

"Don't call me 'sirree

"Dream

"Elfo, Luci, and last but not least, Old Man Touchy,

"Except Weirdo

"From Agøgg to Zøg."

"He used his opposable thumbs to break the thumbs of those who opposed him."

"Henceforth, there shall be no more immorality of any kind!"

"Hi

"Hi, I'm Elfo

"Hi, I'm…"

"I am so out there! Like, anyone else that sees me is like, 'She's out there

"I can't come, my arm got chopped off by a propeller" crap.

"I don't know, maybe because nobody loves me."

"I don't know, maybe you are."

"I don't know. You know, everyone else has it."

"I don't see you out there

"I really wanna stab that stuck up scrivener in the eye with a fork."

"I shower you in roses."

"I'm afraid of dying alone

"I'm afraid of the dark." "I'm afraid of decapitated bodies

"I'm gonna be so famous and super rich. I'm gonna have a yacht!"

"I'm trying to say one thing and you interpret it…"

"Like, you're not listening

"Maybe 'cause you talk to yourself constantly."

"Maybe you don't deserve to be loved

"Message for Princess Tiabeanie

"No more alcohol!"

"No! You're not listening!"

"Nope, that is not the case for everybody else. No, sirree

"Oh, hello, I'm Elfo."

"Oh, wow. I can't feel my face. Do I still have a face?"

"Panda. Punch. Pain

"Son, someday this book might help you like it helped me

"Speak no more of Leavo, Speako

"That noise he makes really creeps me out

"The Royal Log."

"The walls have eyes"?

"There's an inner monologue goin' all the time

"This crown can suck it."

"Ugh, I am, like, accessible."

"Uh uh

"Us"?

"We told you so."

"What am I, walkin' around, not thinking about anybody?"

"Who doesn't talk to themselves constantly?"

"Whoa, dude, these drugs are really kicking in."

"Yeah, I've thought about that! Duh!"

"You have no idea what I'm really saying

"You know what I feel like doing right now?"

"You know what? This is why I just hate talking to you

"You're not out there at all."

[Abner] No! Not the catapult!

[adventurous music playing]

[adventurous music playing]

[adventurous music playing]

[all chanting] Modesty. Modesty. Modesty.

[all chanting] Slurp, slurp, slurp.

[all cheering]

[all cheering]

[all chuckle]

[all clamoring] Yeah!

[all continue repeating]

[all exclaiming]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasping and muttering]

[all gasping]

[all groaning]

[all grunt]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all honking]

[all laugh]

[all laugh]

[all laugh]

[all laugh]

[all laughing]

[all laughing]

[all laughing]

[all loudly] Hi, I'm Elfo!

[all meowing]

[all murmuring]

[all screaming]

[all screaming]

[all singing] ♪ Come, Tiabean, in my flying machine ♪

[all yelling and laughing]

[all yelling]

[all] Elfo?

[all] Hi, I'm Elfo

[all] Huh?

[all] Huzzah!

[all] Moon!

[all] Ooh!

[all] Our Queen.

[all] Princess Mora!

[all] Save us! Save us! Save us!

[all] The task?

[all] Turn that off!

[all] Your every word.

[Alva] I'm sorry you feel that way.

[Alva] I've got a lot of speakers, but there's only one of you, Bean

[Alva] No!

[Alva] Yes, Bean. Don't toot.

[animals cheering]

[announcer] Now arriving on his cute little pony,

[Apothecary] But if we put Zøg down there, who'll have the guts to talk to him?

[Apothecary] Judging from the blood sample I took,

[Archdruidess cackling]

[Archdruidess cackling]

[Archdruidess chuckles]

[Archdruidess clears throat]

[Archdruidess over speakers] Attention, employees!

[Archdruidess] Raise the drawbridge!

[Archdruidess] Shaddup!

[babbling]

[babbling]

[babbling]

[babbling]

[babbling]

[babbling]

[babbling]

[babbling]

[babbling]

[back cracks]

[barks]

[Bean and Luci yell]

[Bean exclaims]

[Bean gasps] Elfo!

[Bean gasps] Look, just beyond Mount Ominous!

[Bean gasps] That ain't good

[Bean groans]

[Bean groans] Here come the spins, and I'm not even drunk

[Bean grunting]

[Bean grunting]

[Bean grunts]

[Bean panting]

[Bean panting]

[Bean screams] Run!

[Bean sighs in exasperation]

[Bean sighs]

[Bean straining]

[Bean yells]

[Bean yells]

[Bean] Better than Heaven, Elfo

[Bean] But none like her.

[Bean] Come on, come on!

[Bean] Damn it! She took her drugs with her.

[Bean] Done. Gun hidden

[Bean] Elfo, the lamps!

[Bean] Faster, Turbish! Drive. Drive!

[Bean] Finally! Lunch!

[Bean] Gotcha!

[Bean] Huh. Actually not as grand as I thought it'd be.

[Bean] I bet there's a clue in Odval's office.

[Bean] I can't see anything! Elfo, be careful!

[Bean] I thought you were taking us to the coffee shop.

[Bean] If I didn't love Bitsy's Bitterbeer so much,

[Bean] Laughing Horse stands out like a laughing thumb

[Bean] Look, there's Merkimer

[Bean] Not again.

[Bean] Oh, no.

[Bean] Oh, sorry.

[Bean] Ow!

[Bean] Poor Pendergast

[Bean] So now you come crawling back, begging me to talk to my dad, huh?

[Bean] Sweet dreams, Freckles.

[Bean] That big wall is not gonna stop the smoke.

[Bean] Then what's with the scary green smoke?

[Bean] There's that little drug door again.

[Bean] Ugh

[Bean] Ugh, God, where's his bed? It's dark in here.

[Bean] What did you mean by that?

[Bean] What?

[Bean] Whoa!

[Bean] Whoa! [screams]

[Bean] Why did I think Merkimer would ever come through for us?

[Bean] Wow! You can really taste the rage

[Bean] Yikes

[Bean] Your face, sorry, sorry

[beeping]

[bell tolling]

[bell tolling]

[bell tolling]

[blabbering]

[blabbers]

[blabbers]

[blabbers]

[blabbers]

[blows and coughs]

[blows horn]

[blows raspberry and honks]

[blows raspberry] "What?"

[blows trumpet]

[blows]

[blows]

[both cackling]

[both chuckle]

[both chuckle]

[both continue laughing]

[both continue]

[both exclaim]

[both exclaiming]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunting]

[both grunting]

[both laugh]

[both laughing]

[both laughing]

[both laughing]

[both scream]

[both screaming]

[both screaming]

[both snicker]

[both] Hmm.

[both] It's the law.

[both] Shut up, Luci

[both] The Merkimer boys.

[both] Women are not permitted to speak in the council chambers

[boys laugh]

[brakes screeching]

[brakes squeal]

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

[bugs splattering]

[Bunny] Oh, brother husband

[burps]

[buzzing]

[car ride honks]

[carnival music playing]

[Chazzzzz] ♪ All night long ♪

[choking]

[chuckles nervously]

[chuckles softly] Jealous? Ow!

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles] Are you freakin' out, man?

[chuckles] Do you go around broadcasting it?

[chuckles] Girl, you are the wrong type of crazy.

[chuckles] Good one, Your Majesty

[chuckles] Huh?

[chuckles] I mean, every day I obsess about my green skin,

[chuckles] No, Darrell. Today I need something far more nefarious.

[chuckles] Of course not

[chuckles] Oh, that's delightfully craven

[chuckles] Okay. That's great. Please stop clapping.

[chuckles] Ooh, look at you. You're not like the other guys

[chuckles] They always head for the abandoned tower

[chuckles] What catchphrase? Oh, no… [whimpering]

[chuckles] What?

[chuckles] Yeah. I got him right in the eye with my tiny fist.

[chuckles] You are so hilarious, Queen. That was a joke, wasn't it?

[chuckling]

[chuckling] Ah!

[chuckling] Yeah, that's it.

[chuckling] Yeah, you better run.

[clanging]

[clanking and crashing]

[clanking]

[clapping stops]

[clattering]

[clears throat and scats]

[clears throat]

[clears throat]

[clears throat]

[clears throat] "By order of the King, me, Derek, I,

[clears throat] Come along, Your Majesty. It's edict time

[clears throat] I've never gotten such attention from women

[clears throat] Let the ceremony begin.

[clears throat] Please. Come in.

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[closing theme music playing]

[conch shell blowing]

[continues repeating]

[continues screaming]

[continues sobbing] Please!

[continues yelping]

[continues yelping]

[coughing and gagging]

[coughing]

[coughs] Man, that water is nasty.

[crashing]

[creaks]

[creepy melody playing]

[crickets chirping]

[crowd cheering]

[crowd cheering]

[crowd cheering]

[crowd cheers louder]

[crowd cheers]

[crowd clamoring]

[crowd clapping]

[crowd claps]

[crowd exclaims]

[crowd gasping]

[crowd gasping]

[crowd gasping]

[crowd gasping]

[crowd gasps]

[crowd groaning]

[crowd laughing]

[crowd] Aw.

[crows cawing]

[crying]

[crying] Help me! Ow.

[crying] It's the best thing that's ever happened to me.

[cushion whooshes]

[Dagmar echoing] Zøg? Oh, Zøg?

[Dagmar grunting]

[Dagmar moaning]

[Dagmar slurps]

[Dagmar snoring]

[Dagmar] And you'll never find your way out without my help

[Dagmar] Get over here

[Dagmar] I used to bring you down here when you were little

[Dagmar] Ladies and whatevers,

[Dagmar] Let me in, Zøg, and I'll let you out.

[Dagmar] Oh, good, you found the dungeon

[Dagmar] Oh, yes. Yeah.

[Dagmar] Remember, darling, if you show your face in Dreamland…

[Dagmar] The bride has arrived.

[Derek exclaiming]

[Derek groans] "Edict number 43

[Derek grunts]

[Derek grunts]

[Derek singing] ♪ Old King Zøg Dumb as a frog ♪

[Derek whimpers]

[Derek] "And, most importantly, no more comedy!"

[Derek] "No more gambling!"

[Derek] "No more unlicensed vending!"

[Derek] "No unlawful cohabitation!"

[Derek] All right, butts down.

[Derek] Hmm.

[Derek] Ow, ow, ow

[Derek] Star light, bar fight, first star I see tonight,

[Derek] Whoa!

[Derek] Yay!

[Derek] Yay! I'm Bedroom Boy!

[distorted] Whoa.

[donkey braying]

[door closes]

[door creaks]

[doorbell rings]

[dramatic music playing]

[dramatic music playing]

[dramatic music playing]

[dramatic music playing]

[dreamy whimsical music playing]

[drums beating]

[echoing]

[echoing]

[Edith] Elfo? Elfo, wake up!

[Edith] Ooh, that's the worst three cards I've ever dealt

[electricity crackles]

[elephant trumpets]

[elevator bell dings]

[elevator music playing]

[elf grunts]

[elf] Is that you, Rulo?

[Elfo and Bean grunting]

[Elfo and Luci chuckling] Ooh, whoa.

[Elfo banging on globe] Hey. It's dark in here.

[Elfo choking]

[Elfo continues exclaiming]

[Elfo continues screaming]

[Elfo exclaims]

[Elfo exclaims]

[Elfo groans]

[Elfo grunts]

[Elfo grunts]

[Elfo gulps]

[Elfo scatting]

[Elfo screams]

[Elfo sobbing]

[Elfo sobbing] Boing.

[Elfo sobbing] I'm sorry!

[Elfo stammering] Bean, your boot!

[Elfo whimpering]

[Elfo whimpering]

[Elfo whimpers]

[Elfo whistles]

[Elfo yelps]

[Elfo] "Elfo, nothing will tear us apart."

[Elfo] Ah. Finally

[Elfo] Bean, how can you be sleepy at a time like this?

[Elfo] Bean! Bean!

[Elfo] Bean? Bean!

[Elfo] Come on. Float.

[Elfo] Ew, green.

[Elfo] Flick.

[Elfo] Flick.

[Elfo] Go after her, Bean!

[Elfo] Good night, Bean.

[Elfo] Hello?

[Elfo] Help! I swallowed $50!

[Elfo] Hi, I'm Elfo's hand!

[Elfo] Hmm.

[Elfo] I hope that doesn't happen again.

[Elfo] No, Missy! No, no, no.

[Elfo] No. Yes. Ow!

[Elfo] Oh, no, Bean, they're getting ideas!

[Elfo] Oh, no, Junior

[Elfo] Oh, wow!

[Elfo] Oh. Yeah, just a minute.

[Elfo] Ow!

[Elfo] Ow!

[Elfo] Ow!

[Elfo] Put me down. I don't like being carried.

[Elfo] Totally fine!

[Elfo] Uh, what's the deal with those freaky mushrooms?

[Elfo] Wait there! We'll be right back!

[Elfo] What?

[Elfo] What?

[Elfo] Yee haw! Battle speed!

[Elfo] You know what really pisses me off?

[Elfo] You've got a pretty voice.

[engine idling]

[engine revs]

[engine revving]

[engine sputtering and dying]

[exclaims]

[exclaims]

[exclaims]

[exclaims]

[exclaims]

[exhales deeply]

[exhales sharply]

[exhales]

[exhales] I'm still recovering from last night's old timer sex party.

[faint laughter]

[fanfare]

[footsteps squeaking]

[Freckles whistles]

[Freckles] Good night, Bean.

[Freckles] Hey, watch it. That ladder's my uncle.

[gagging]

[gasping and grunting]

[gasping, breathing heavily]

[gasping]

[gasping]

[gasps and burps]

[gasps and exclaims]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps] And I no longer have to call you "darling

[gasps] Breaking an old woman's cane.

[gasps] Did you say "big skillet"?

[gasps] Elfo!

[gasps] Elfo!

[gasps] Elfo?

[gasps] I can't believe my various eyes!

[gasps] I don't have any magic!

[gasps] It's like that big bright dot in the constellation.

[gasps] Mom?

[gasps] No, Edith! Where did she go?

[gasps] Oh, it's just Leavo

[gasps] Salty, sour and slimy? It's like the holy trinity of savory!

[gasps] Someone's torn out the pages

[gasps] What the hell? Ogres?

[gasps] You saw that?

[gasps] You're not?

[gibbers]

[gnaws]

[God] Welcome to Heaven, Luci.

[Gordy] That was kind of fun. You can sleep in there tonight.

[groaning]

[groaning]

[groaning]

[groaning]

[groaning]

[groaning] And worst of all, my wonderful, crazy daughter is dead

[groaning] I'm dyin' over here

[groaning] Ow! Ow!

[groaning] You'll rue the day you messed with my daughter…

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans] "I am out there

[groans] Enough with the Trixy

[groans] I knew this day would come

[groans] My wee hooves are good for nothing. I'm useless

[groans] My wound

[groans] So many stairs.

[groans] This is so humiliating

[growling]

[growling]

[grunting and babbling]

[grunting and groaning] Hey!

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunts and coughs]

[grunts and mumbles]

[grunts and screams]

[grunts and screams]

[grunts and yelps]

[grunts softly]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts] And I got itches comin'! Oh, no, they're here

[grunts] Green smoke? [whimpering]

[grunts] How did I get in here?

[grunts] I mean, it's unreal.

[grunts] I'd say it's good to be back,

[grunts] Neither of us are cats!

[grunts] Nothing like being burned at the stake to work up an appetite

[grunts] Odval? Is that you?

[grunts] Oh, it's you, kitty cat.

[grunts] Okay, Missy. Push!

[grunts] Old Man Touchy reporting for duty.

[grunts] Ow!

[grunts] Ow!

[grunts] Stupid cat. I used to be the most annoying guy around here.

[grunts] This is ridiculous!

[grunts] This place looks awful. Who's in charge here?

[grunts] What are you doin', you?

[guard] Man, what a jerk.

[guard] Your Majesty, the torture chamber is ready.

[guards grunt]

[gulps]

[harmonizing melody]

[hawk screeches]

[hawk screeches]

[honking and babbling]

[honking and grunting]

[honking]

[honks faintly] See? I would've loved to be the hero of the story,

[honks]

[honks]

[honks]

[honks]

[honks]

[honks]

[honks] Idiots…

[honks] Who the hell is that guy?

[horn blares]

[horn blares]

[horn blares]

[horn playing]

[howls]

[imitates explosion]

[imitates gobbling sound]

[imitates guitar]

[imitates screaming]

[imitates Zøg's honk]

[imitates Zøg's honking sounds]

[imitating Dagmar] Hello, darlings

[imitating Dagmar] I'm obviously the real Dagmar, you twits!

[imitating Dagmar] Now, where is that little green bugger?

[imitating Dagmar] Show us the way out, darlings

[imitating Dagmar] Thank you, suck up

[imitating Dagmar] Um, did I say "Dad"? I meant "husband

[imitating Zøg] "Once the biggest idiot has spoken, wrap it up."

[imitating Zøg] "Tell them jackasses that I said to do what you say."

[imitating Zøg] "Those idiots are so dumb, they'll believe anything."

[in cutesy voice] "Hi, Bean! I'm Squalid Squirrel!" [laughs]

[in English] That can't be good

[in hypnotist voice] You're getting sleepy.

[in normal voice] And by "you," he means me.

[in normal voice] I couldn't get one normal parent?

[in normal voice] It's working. Maybe I am a lot like my mother

[in normal voice] Uh, I mean, get us out of here.

[in normal voice] We can't leave without Elfo

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[inhales sharply] Oh! It's too hard.

[jingling]

[joints creaking]

[joyful music playing]

[Junior screaming]

[kids scream]

[kisses]

[kisses] Give me a kiss. It's gonna be okay. Okay, bubbeleh?

[knock on door]

[knocking]

[Laughing Horse laughs]

[Laughing Horse laughs]

[laughing]

[laughing]

[laughing]

[laughing] I'm a goddamn genius

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs] I will miss the belly rubs

[laughs] Just listen, okay?

[laughs] Wrap it up

[laughter continues]

[leaves rustling]

[Leavo] The legendary ancient seat of elven power, Candyass

[locks clicking]

[loudly] I said it's your slinky ex wife Oona and troubled daughter Bean!

[loudly] I said, "Seconds from now, take a sharp right turn!"

[loudly] Turbish! I hear you breathing.

[Luci exclaims]

[Luci gibbers]

[Luci groans]

[Luci grunting]

[Luci screams]

[Luci softly] Hey, psst, Bean.

[Luci sputtering]

[Luci] Elfo, whatever you do, keep your mouth shut

[Luci] Help me, not Elfo!

[Luci] Hmm.

[Luci] I would have also accepted stupid, foolish or schmucky.

[Luci] Oh, no

[Luci] Oh, we have these in Hell. They're called crypts.

[Luci] Ruh roh

[Luci] The masses have spoken.

[Luci] Told ya

[Luci] Whoa!

[Luci] Whoops.

[Luci] Yikes.

[Luci] Zøg, buddy, wake up.

[Malfus] It is written on the walls that you must take this horse on your journey.

[Malfus] Wait! You took the wrong box!

[man 1] Oh, no! My precious fluids!

[man 1] Step right up, folks.

[man 2 over speakers] Steam! The warm, damp touch of modern life.

[man 2] Early Sauna Man used this natural resource to relax and maybe take a shvitz.

[man 2] Okay, revolution's postponed for another day

[man 2] Ow!

[man and woman scream]

[man groans]

[man on screen] Princess Diandra, we must return the Orb of Splen dor

[man shouting] Alarm! Alarm! Alarm! Alarm!

[man] Gouge its eyes out, one at a time.

[man] Have a bowl of flavorless mush

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Hey!

[man] Quiet

[man] Wait! We know two more songs!

[maracas continue playing]

[Merkimer chuckles]

[Merkimer] Mother! Father!

[Merkimer] Mumsy and Daddy? I had enough of them

[Merkimer] Sad

[Merkimer] That's the garage.

[Mertz's mom sighs] Not again

[Mertz's mother] Are you sure?

[Mertz's mother] What's that noise?

[Mertz] I was hiding under the throne since Tuesday

[Mertz] It's not just me! It's only Turbish! Ha!

[mimicking echo] I, I, I… What, what, what…

[mimicking echo] Oh, my God, God, God, God, God.

[mimicking echo] Yes, yes, yes!

[Miss Moonpence] Ahem. Sometimes, it takes a woman

[Miss Moonpence] Can I help?

[Miss Moonpence] When I said "help," I meant with a cup of tea or a biscuit.

[Miss Moonpence] Yes, Minister.

[Miss Moonpence] Yes. I sent them down with Sorcerio.

[Miss Moonpence] You better hide. Odval's coming.

[moans]

[monkey screeches]

[monocle splashes]

[monster groans]

[monster grunting]

[monster snorting and breathing heavily]

[Mora gasps]

[Mora groans]

[Mora] "Home" is another word you don't say here.

[Mora] Bean?

[Mora] I said I didn't bring you anything

[mouse gasps]

[mouse imitating siren]

[mouse] Ow!

[mouthing]

[muffled groaning]

[mumbling indistinctly]

[mumbling]

[mumbling]

[music box creaking and winding]

[muttering and laughing]

[muttering]

[Odval] And for the kingdom.

[Odval] And the king lives, too

[Odval] Hmm…

[Odval] Shush. Let's see how he's doing

[Odval] What is that? Some kind of clown car grave?

[ogres grunting and clamoring]

[ogres grunting and clamoring]

[ogres grunting and screaming]

[ogres grunting]

[oinks]

[ominous music playing]

[Oona groaning]

[Oona yelling]

[Oona] I hide you good, Zøggy.

[Oona] Is okay, Roy.

[Oona] Not gecko, newt!

[Oona] Quiet! Don't do that!

[Oona] So, what did you hear?

[Oona] That should be family motto.

[Oona] You are back? Did you get Bentwood moneys and weapons?

[Oona] Zøggy!

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[opening theme music playing]

[owls hooting]

[P.T

[P.T.] That's right, Elfo, don't.

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting] Okay, that's the final freak except you, Elfo. Let's go

[panting] Whoa!

[pants]

[people yelp]

[piano music playing]

[playing jazz]

[playing regal tune]

[playing smooth jazz tune]

[playing tribal music]

[plays note]

[psychedelic music playing]

[radio channels scanning]

[radio plays in Spanish]

[rattling and thudding]

[regal harpsichord music playing]

[regal horn music playing]

[retches]

[rhythmic grunting]

[robot powers down]

[robots whirring]

[robots whirring]

[rope winding up]

[rumbling]

[rumbling]

[sad music playing]

[Sagatha grunts]

[Sagatha] Hey, where's the profit in that?

[Sagatha] Pull up a log and meet the fairies.

[Sagatha] Welcome to Fairyland, where anything goes

[sarcastically] Yay.

[scatting]

[scatting]

[scatting]

[scoffing] I paid him!

[scoffing] Uh, what? That's an elf?

[scoffs] "Just Leavo"? This is Leavo, as in,

[scoffs] "Well, yeah, maybe."

[scoffs] And Bean thought I couldn't take care of myself

[scoffs] Come on! Who talks that way?

[scoffs] I don't know.

[scoffs] I spit on your sunny disposition. To important matters.

[scoffs] Not that much

[scoffs] She doesn't even have a throat

[scoffs] That's rich coming from a guy who puts a toddler in a trench coat

[scoffs] You should see her in a drunken bar fight

[scratching]

[screaming and grunting]

[screaming]

[screaming]

[screaming]

[screaming]

[screaming]

[screaming]

[screaming]

[screaming]

[screaming] Hell no!

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams] Oh, no! Run!

[seagull squawks]

[seagulls squawking]

[seagulls squawking]

[sentimental music playing]

[ship creaks]

[Shocko vocalizing] Ooh!

[shoes continue squelching]

[shoes squelching]

[shouting] A monster comes for us all!

[shouting] No!

[shouting] Okay, shut up!

[shouts] Ah!

[shouts] You're going to have a hard time keeping this quiet!

[shower running]

[shushes]

[shushes] Is not place to discuss. We must not risk waking your father.

[sighs in contentment]

[sighs in relief]

[sighs wearily]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs] At least this side of his head is undamaged

[sighs] Being king is hard

[sighs] Finally, all alone.

[sighs] Give me that!

[sighs] God damn it. Oh, newbies, we're waiting.

[sighs] I miss footwear.

[sighs] I shouldn't have told the other mermaids that.

[sighs] It's been a long day.

[sighs] Now these boots were made for thinking.

[sighs] Okay, they'll never find us in here

[sighs] Thanks, dude.

[singing despondently] 🎵 My cat is fancy 🎵

[singing] ♪ Rock a bye, Zøggy In the treetops ♪

[singing] ♪ Depressing birthday to you Depressing birthday to you ♪

[siren blowing]

[siren wailing in distance]

[slurping]

[slurping]

[slurps and chomps]

[slurps]

[smacking]

[smacks lips and blows]

[Snarla] Hey, Oona, how's it hanging?

[Snarla] Yeah, shut up about the skillet, Derek

[sniffing] Me smell something me sure me not like

[sniffs] Well, they smell amazing.

[snoring]

[snoring]

[snoring]

[snoring]

[snoring]

[snoring]

[snoring]

[snoring] Mmm.

[snorts]

[sobbing]

[softly] Edith

[softly] Elfo, over here

[softly] Quietly announcing the arrival

[soldiers grunt]

[sputtering]

[squawks]

[squeaks]

[squeals]

[squeals]

[stops whistling and yelps]

[struggling]

[struggling] No! No!

[stutters] Oh, yeah? Well, I'm your mother and I have to love you

[sucking]

[suction noises receding]

[suction noises]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[suspenseful violin music playing]

[sword swishing]

[tense music playing]

[tense music playing]

[tense music playing]

[throne creaking]

[thud]

[thud]

[thudding and hissing]

[thudding]

[thuds]

[thunder cracking]

[thunder cracks]

[toddlers singing] ♪ Old King Zøg Dumb as a frog ♪

[Trøg] Anybody remember how we get out of this?

[Trøg] What?

[Trøgs clapping]

[Trøgs gasping]

[Trøgs groaning]

[Trøgs grunting]

[Trøgs slurp]

[Trøgs] Aw…

[Trøgs] Moon

[Trøgs] Welcome back, friends

[train whistle hoots]

[Trixy moans and grunts]

[Trixy] And this is the Pool of Reflection,

[Trixy] Dagmar said to show you the scenic route.

[Trixy] He's stuffed with dried corn. That's what makes him posable.

[Trixy] It's me. Naked.

[Trixy] They're called Trøg logs.

[Trøgs] Shut up, Elfo!

[Trøgs] The symbol!

[trumpets playing regal tune]

[trumpets playing]

[Turbish] Ha ha, the only way up here is the secret door to your immediate left!

[Turbish] Hi, friend

[Turbish] I go bye now. Bye.

[Turbish] It's just Mertz. Only Mertz!

[Turbish] Welcome to Dreamland! Thank you for traveling Turbish Express!

[various alarms and horns go off]

[various bells clanging]

[villagers cheer]

[villagers clamoring]

[villagers clamoring]

[vocalizing]

[Walrus chuckles]

[Walrus grunts]

[waltz music playing]

[water bubbling and splashing]

[water splashing]

[water splashing]

[whimpering and yelping]

[whimpering]

[whimpering]

[whimpers]

[whimpers]

[whispering] Ah! Now, everyone tiptoe out, quiet as dead mouse.

[whispering] Is this the mother you're always talking about?

[whispering] It's going to be okay.

[whispering] No, like Dagmar, you rube!

[whispering] Really? That's the best you got?

[whispering] Remember this insult when the revolution comes

[whispering] She's sleeping. We gotta be quiet

[whispering] Sixteen cat feet

[whispers] He's good.

[whispers] I am looking for an array of stabbing instruments

[whispers] Is it wise to have Zøg untethered like that?

[whispers] Oona

[whispers] See, you gotta watch out for my hand!

[whistle blows]

[whistle hoots poorly]

[whistle hoots]

[whistle hoots]

[whistle hoots]

[whistles hooting]

[whistles]

[whistling to the tune of "Old King Zøg"]

[wind whistling]

[wind whooshing]

[window squeaks]

[woman] Ooh!

[woman] We're sorry for screaming

[yawns] Someday.

[yelling] Here we go!

[yells]

[yells]

[yells]

[yells]

[yells] Edith!

[yells] Have you gone crazy?

[yells] Hi, I'm Elfo!

[yells] No!

[yells] No!

[yells] Whoa! There it is!

[yelping]

[yelping]

[yelps]

[yelps]

[Zøg blabbering]

[Zøg gasps and grunts]

[Zøg groaning]

[Zøg grunting]

[Zøg grunts]

[Zøg laughing hysterically]

[Zøg screams]

[Zøg yelling] Help!

[Zøg yelping and screaming]

[Zøg as Freckles] Hi, Beanie! Over here!

[Zøg babbling and honking]

[Zøg babbling]

[Zøg babbling]

[Zøg continues babbling]

[Zøg exclaiming and babbling]

[Zøg groans]

[Zøg honking]

[Zøg honks three times]

[Zøg mimicking echo and grumbling]

[Zøg snoring]

[Zøg snoring]

[Zøg snoring]

[Zøg] About myself.

[Zøg] Hey, wait a minute.

[Zøg] Lower the goddamn drawbridge right now

[Zøg] Please, no more.

[Zøg] Wait, hold on.

[Zøg] What about yummy little cocktail wieners?

♪ All night long ♪

♪ Boo dee bee dee ♪ [yelps]

♪ But I can keep you floating If you just hold on to me ♪

♪ Honk, honk, honk Honk, honk, honk ♪

♪ Honks go away Bye bye, honking ♪

♪ Just sleep it off I won't call the cops ♪

♪ No more honking ♪

♪ Queen Beanie, chili beanie ♪

♪ Stab, stab, stab Stab, stab, stab ♪

♪ The driver of the cart goes ♪

♪ The driver of the cart Goes stab, stab, stab ♪

♪ The king in the cart goes Honk, honk, honk ♪

♪ The king in the cart goes Honk, honk, honk ♪

♪ Then finally Luci's ruler of all ♪

♪ They say that you're a drowner And we're parted by the sea ♪

♪ When the king breaks The kingdom will fall ♪

…melon scooped my eye right outta there

…they'll kill you

♪ And I am always on your side ♪

♪ And lines are drawn ♪

♪ And someday if there's a war On some not so distant shore ♪

♪ Because I do ♪

♪ Believe it's true ♪

♪ Brains of a monkey Balls of a hog ♪

♪ Brains of a monkey Balls of a hog ♪

♪ Going up she goes Up she goes ♪

♪ I'll keep you safe, I'm on your team And when it feels like just a dream ♪

♪ I'm never gone ♪

♪ Oh, no, the blimp is on fire ♪

♪ This star's your guide ♪

♪ Up, up a little bit higher ♪

♪ We're on fire ♪

🎵 Look at his little crown 🎵