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Dufrais Constantinople character from Fonejacker on the phone, showcasing a mix of humor and confusion in a vintage setting.

Dufrais Constantinople - Fonejacker

Dufrais Constantinople is a complaining Jewish man (he is sometimes pictured wearing a yarmulke) who calls an electric fence company to ask if it will stop the kids from next door from kicking the ball into his garden; he also calls a P.I and asks why he is being followed only to enter into argument, and also the Met Office about an incorrect newspaper report of the weather. He gives his name in two of his three calls, by spelling it out using words by saying "D for Donald, U for up, F for Friday, R for raspberry, A for ah, I for is and S for stratosphere", with D once being for 'Derrick'. He always struggles to find a word starting with S, claiming his mind has gone blank. Facejacker / Phonejacker.

But it's all about that. I went blank all of a sudden. It's a pressure you're putting me under with. You are uncomfortable silences.
Bye.
Hello, yes, I'd like to make a complaint please.
Hello.
How big your pardon? I'm extremely intelligent.
I'm a lawyer, well below is a writer. Well, yeah, I'm a lawyer. Well, a lawyer who the writer well do the filmmaker Bob Scriptable data web, sort of descripti kind of filmmaker doesn't match either...
I'm afraid that's none of your business.
I'm sorry I'm not understanding any of this year. You're talking absolute gibberish.
No, you won't.
Now I know that I know I'm onto you.
Now I'm actually ahead of the resident's committee.
Now, why does he?
That's right, yes.
This who's paying you please?
Well you will very ugly.
Well, I'll be taking matters further. Thank you.
Well, it's a very stupid neighbors and did a stupid name for a stupid person who is very ugly.
Well, there you go. Then you you see you admitted it.
Well, you should know that.
What's your name, please?
Yes, give me your manager then please.
Yes, my name is Dufrais.
Yes.
You don't have to tell me twice. You only have to be once.
Your service is an absolute disgrace.