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Bruno (2009) Bruno (2009) is a satirical comedy film directed by Larry Charles, known for his work on Borat. The movie

Bruno (2009)

Bruno (2009) is a satirical comedy film directed by Larry Charles, known for his work on Borat. The movie features acclaimed British comedian Sacha Baron Cohen, who takes on the role of the flamboyantly gay fashion journalist, Bruno. As Bruno travels from Austria to Los Angeles, he hilariously exposes the absurdities of the fashion industry and challenges societal norms with his outrageous antics.

The cast of Bruno includes Gustaf Hammarsten, as Bruno's devoted assistant Lutz, and a host of cameos from celebrities like Bono, Snoop Dogg, and Paula Abdul. Their appearances add to the comedic brilliance of the film.

If you're interested in experiencing the wacky sounds and laughter-inducing moments of Bruno, you can play and download them here. Just a warning though, the movie pushes boundaries and contains explicit content, so be prepared for a wild ride! But if you appreciate Baron Cohen's fearless approach to satire, Bruno is a must-watch.

A List Celebrity Max Out mit Bruno.
A List Celebrity Max Out mit Bruno.
A little sensitive subject here. How much does she weigh?
A little sensitive subject here. How much does she weigh?
A place for anal bleaching
A place for anal bleaching
About what?
About what?
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Africa is a continent, not a country, baby. Get it right.
Africa is a continent, not a country, baby. Get it right.
Agree to give the pyramids back to the Israelis?
Agree to give the pyramids back to the Israelis?
All right, and then what would you be doing?
All right, and then what would you be doing?
All right, but wait a second. You are the baby's father now.
All right, but wait a second. You are the baby's father now.
All right, God damn it.
All right, God damn it.
All right, picture's next. Last looks, please.
All right, picture's next. Last looks, please.
All right, this is...
All right, this is...
All right, well, you know, there is a finale to this talk show.
All right, well, you know, there is a finale to this talk show.
All right. Do we have another photo, or is that the last one?
All right. Do we have another photo, or is that the last one?
All right. I think, guys, we're finished.
All right. I think, guys, we're finished.
All right. So how did you find your son?
All right. So how did you find your son?
All right. What do you think there? Is that a white trash foetus?
All right. What do you think there? Is that a white trash foetus?
All the most famous stars in the world,
All the most famous stars in the world,
Also, Bruno just needed to find the hottest world tragedy to fix.
Also, Bruno just needed to find the hottest world tragedy to fix.
Also, great. Maybe they can let us out.
Also, great. Maybe they can let us out.
Also, ich headed to my first meeting mit a Hollywood uber agent.
Also, ich headed to my first meeting mit a Hollywood uber agent.
Also, ich hired a top photographer
Also, ich hired a top photographer
Also, so tell me about your humanitarian work.
Also, so tell me about your humanitarian work.
Although he did cost us a MacBook Pro.
Although he did cost us a MacBook Pro.
Although, I did once suffocate a hamster in Mykonos.
Although, I did once suffocate a hamster in Mykonos.
Am I going to be able to meet her before we actually start?
Am I going to be able to meet her before we actually start?
Amateur science?
Amateur science?
Amazing.
Amazing.
And at this time, we're taking the child into protective custody.
And at this time, we're taking the child into protective custody.
And give them a chance to seduce you.
And give them a chance to seduce you.
And he dresses like the policemen, how would you know that's him?
And he dresses like the policemen, how would you know that's him?
And I am on the verge of buying Mr. Magorium's Wunderbar Emporium.
And I am on the verge of buying Mr. Magorium's Wunderbar Emporium.
And I flew back here to America,
And I flew back here to America,
And I have known him personally for most of that time.
And I have known him personally for most of that time.
And I have personally known him for most of that time.
And I have personally known him for most of that time.
And I just feel like that's been my life.
And I just feel like that's been my life.
And I want the best guys in the business to kidnap me. Al Qaeda is so 2001.
And I want the best guys in the business to kidnap me. Al Qaeda is so 2001.
And I'm just trying to run in und kiss you...
And I'm just trying to run in und kiss you...
And I'm pretty, in that sense, pretty ordinary.
And I'm pretty, in that sense, pretty ordinary.
And it's very important what scores you give it,
And it's very important what scores you give it,
And just make love forever
And just make love forever
And lifting weights and building your muscles
And lifting weights and building your muscles
And make all nations calmer
And make all nations calmer
And play the clarinet with everything inside of you.
And play the clarinet with everything inside of you.
And put me in touch with one of his chums.
And put me in touch with one of his chums.
And quit telling me to look at you in the eye. Okay?
And quit telling me to look at you in the eye. Okay?
And so I was just trying to break it up with some simple horizontal lines.
And so I was just trying to break it up with some simple horizontal lines.
And take your little briefs off before I fucking rip them?
And take your little briefs off before I fucking rip them?
And the ears, like, have not been developed yet.
And the ears, like, have not been developed yet.
And the most exciting and amazing thing in the town,
And the most exciting and amazing thing in the town,
And then come in and break his arm. Take it here, take him out.
And then come in and break his arm. Take it here, take him out.
And then they would broadcast it to the whole world.
And then they would broadcast it to the whole world.
And then when you're facing me, that's called cowgirl.
And then when you're facing me, that's called cowgirl.
And then when you're turned the opposite way, it's reverse cowgirl.
And then when you're turned the opposite way, it's reverse cowgirl.
And then, like, which one now?
And then, like, which one now?
And they never get back to the first point maybe ever.
And they never get back to the first point maybe ever.
And they said they're, like, really, really exhausted after they do her.
And they said they're, like, really, really exhausted after they do her.
And they'll say, "If Bruno can do it, then I can do it.
And they'll say, "If Bruno can do it, then I can do it.
And they'll say, "It's Jesus. He changed me."
And they'll say, "It's Jesus. He changed me."
And they're asking... They've been staying at the hotel for a while
And they're asking... They've been staying at the hotel for a while
And wanted to know if I can get the key for them because they can't get out of bed.
And wanted to know if I can get the key for them because they can't get out of bed.
And we had O.J. back,
And we had O.J. back,
And women often don't stick to the point.
And women often don't stick to the point.
And you chose to dress that baby up in a T shirt that says what?
And you chose to dress that baby up in a T shirt that says what?
Anybody want a sandwich or something?
Anybody want a sandwich or something?
Apart from Germany.
Apart from Germany.
Are there any activities you suggest
Are there any activities you suggest
Are there any new hobbies that I should take up?
Are there any new hobbies that I should take up?
Are there any outdoor activities
Are there any outdoor activities
Are you 100% hetero like me?
Are you 100% hetero like me?
Are you hitting on me?
Are you hitting on me?
Are you ready for some man slamming action?
Are you ready for some man slamming action?
Are you ready to make that change?
Are you ready to make that change?
Around some other men who are not gay.
Around some other men who are not gay.
As for Lutz, we decided to get married in California.
As for Lutz, we decided to get married in California.
As you know, the defendant
As you know, the defendant
As you know, the defendant has served our municipality as city controller
As you know, the defendant has served our municipality as city controller
Aus. Chlamydia.
Aus. Chlamydia.
Austria. And what are your impressions of the American people?
Austria. And what are your impressions of the American people?
Beat his fucking ass!
Beat his fucking ass!
Because das ist A List Celebrity Max Out.
Because das ist A List Celebrity Max Out.
Because if the show scores over an 85%,,
Because if the show scores over an 85%,,
Because she's got the Elle Style Awards.
Because she's got the Elle Style Awards.
Because some of them don't even dress no different than myself or you.
Because some of them don't even dress no different than myself or you.
Because that would harm my body. That would hurt...
Because that would harm my body. That would hurt...
Boom. As I roll across.
Boom. As I roll across.
Bradolf Pittler?
Bradolf Pittler?
Bringing up a child without another parent. Am I right?
Bringing up a child without another parent. Am I right?
Bruno had backstage access for the hottest show of the week, de la Prada.
Bruno had backstage access for the hottest show of the week, de la Prada.
Bruno has known true love twice in his life.
Bruno has known true love twice in his life.
Bruno wants peace.
Bruno wants peace.
Bruno was aus.
Bruno was aus.
Bruno!
Bruno!
Bruno.
Bruno.
But because of the law, we had to be a bit inventive.
But because of the law, we had to be a bit inventive.
But Bruno had a new plan.
But Bruno had a new plan.
But can I assure you, the toilet is absolutely spotless.
But can I assure you, the toilet is absolutely spotless.
But do you have something, maybe a double...
But do you have something, maybe a double...
But even though marriage was a nicht nicht,
But even though marriage was a nicht nicht,
But for the last 9 years, ich have been head uber heels in love
But for the last 9 years, ich have been head uber heels in love
But he did get me a starring role in a top TV show as an extra.
But he did get me a starring role in a top TV show as an extra.
But is gonna really make a difference, you know, really put me into the A list.
But is gonna really make a difference, you know, really put me into the A list.
But it's the hardest job in the world, isn't it?
But it's the hardest job in the world, isn't it?
But the message is not ordinary.
But the message is not ordinary.
But the team that do it were booked up for the next 4 days
But the team that do it were booked up for the next 4 days
But this is the girl's position.
But this is the girl's position.
But which one?
But which one?
But you're being really nasty.
But you're being really nasty.
But you're being really nasty.
But you're being really nasty.
By the way, where's your uniform? Go get your uniform on.
By the way, where's your uniform? Go get your uniform on.
Bye, baby, I love you.
Bye, baby, I love you.
Can anybody give me one sentence?
Can anybody give me one sentence?
Can I ask him if he has any advice for me?
Can I ask him if he has any advice for me?
Can I give you guys a word of advice?
Can I give you guys a word of advice?
Can I still play the clarinet?
Can I still play the clarinet?
Can I tell you about the person that changed my life?
Can I tell you about the person that changed my life?
Can Olivia lose 10 pounds in the next week?
Can Olivia lose 10 pounds in the next week?
Can you be quiet?
Can you be quiet?
Can you look into this camera and just say,
Can you look into this camera and just say,
Can you look? The key, I think, is over there, just...
Can you look? The key, I think, is over there, just...
Can you switch off the television? Because I made a fart,
Can you switch off the television? Because I made a fart,
Candidate, what are you doing?
Candidate, what are you doing?
Charity was a great way to become famous.
Charity was a great way to become famous.
Clean water, food and teaching
Clean water, food and teaching
Come and sit on our great furniture.
Come and sit on our great furniture.
Come back, please. Can you please come back?
Come back, please. Can you please come back?
Come on, it will be fun.
Come on, it will be fun.
Come on, Jack, look me in the eyes.
Come on, Jack, look me in the eyes.
Come on! Back!
Come on! Back!
Come on. What's the big deal? It's just a couple of guys.
Come on. What's the big deal? It's just a couple of guys.
Compelled him to accept hundreds of thousands of dollars in bribes.
Compelled him to accept hundreds of thousands of dollars in bribes.
Could you hold the sheet over there?
Could you hold the sheet over there?
Could you take your finger out of my Arschenholer?
Could you take your finger out of my Arschenholer?
Creating love is my mission
Creating love is my mission
Cut. Sorry, I'm not feeling this one. Could we go again?
Cut. Sorry, I'm not feeling this one. Could we go again?
Definitely the hands look way too big,
Definitely the hands look way too big,
Depending on his range. Boom. Then to his face. Boom.
Depending on his range. Boom. Then to his face. Boom.
Despite having an eyeful of Schpunken.
Despite having an eyeful of Schpunken.
Didn't see anything.
Didn't see anything.
Diesel, I love you. Diesel.
Diesel, I love you. Diesel.
Difficult issue on the phone.
Difficult issue on the phone.
Do any of you guys want to make some more money?
Do any of you guys want to make some more money?
Do as I say. Take that fucking shit off now!
Do as I say. Take that fucking shit off now!
Do it!
Do it!
Do we all share one tent or what's more sensible?
Do we all share one tent or what's more sensible?
Do you have an attitude, candidate? Do we detect an attitude?
Do you have an attitude, candidate? Do we detect an attitude?
Do you think this kid is retarded?
Do you think this kid is retarded?
Do you want some strawberries
Do you want some strawberries
Does she always have to be in a car seat, or can she just, like, freestyle it?
Does she always have to be in a car seat, or can she just, like, freestyle it?
Dolce und Gabbana. Hello?
Dolce und Gabbana. Hello?
Don't call me gay!
Don't call me gay!
Don't fuck around!
Don't fuck around!
Don't fuck around!
Don't fuck around!
Don't kill each other
Don't kill each other
Du bist Bruno, dove of peace
Du bist Bruno, dove of peace
Dude.
Dude.
Either we gonna have peace, or we gonna have motherfucking war.
Either we gonna have peace, or we gonna have motherfucking war.
Even though my baby's black. So it's pretty cool, no?
Even though my baby's black. So it's pretty cool, no?
Everything.
Everything.
Excellent. Does he like it?
Excellent. Does he like it?
Excuse me, can you unlock us? Please. Hello? Can you unlock us?
Excuse me, can you unlock us? Please. Hello? Can you unlock us?
Fine. Yeah, I don't mind her being up on a crucifix.
Fine. Yeah, I don't mind her being up on a crucifix.
For more than 12 years,
For more than 12 years,
For the host of the brand new TV show, Straight Dave's Man Slammin' Maxout.
For the host of the brand new TV show, Straight Dave's Man Slammin' Maxout.
For the second time in a century,
For the second time in a century,
From the fashion streets of Milan, only for the German girls, my great hairs.
From the fashion streets of Milan, only for the German girls, my great hairs.
From the pop dance group Milli und Vanilli.
From the pop dance group Milli und Vanilli.
Fuck him up!
Fuck him up!
Fuck that shit! Fuck that shit!
Fuck that shit! Fuck that shit!
Fuck that shit! Fuck that shit!
Fuck that shit! Fuck that shit!
Fuck, yeah.
Fuck, yeah.
Fucking fag!
Fucking fag!
Fucking fag!
Fucking fag!
Full of them.
Full of them.
Funkyzeit is uber influential.
Funkyzeit is uber influential.
Gayby.
Gayby.
George is comfortable with everything. He's fine.
George is comfortable with everything. He's fine.
Get him, motherfucker!
Get him, motherfucker!
Get off me. That is my baby.
Get off me. That is my baby.
Get on your fucking knees and suck my spike here, bitch.
Get on your fucking knees and suck my spike here, bitch.
Get out of my TAC Alley.
Get out of my TAC Alley.
Get out. Get out now.
Get out. Get out now.
Get that out of my face.
Get that out of my face.
Give him back! Give me my baby back!
Give him back! Give me my baby back!
Give it away, let a friend hold it until you know in your mind
Give it away, let a friend hold it until you know in your mind
Give it up for Straight Dave!
Give it up for Straight Dave!
Give me my baby back!
Give me my baby back!
Give me my baby! Give him back!
Give me my baby! Give him back!
Give me my baby! O.J.!
Give me my baby! O.J.!
Go get them!
Go get them!
Great! Das is all maximum Santzgaut!
Great! Das is all maximum Santzgaut!
Great.
Great.
Great. Fantastisch news.
Great. Fantastisch news.
Great. You must be hungry. Let's bring in some food.
Great. You must be hungry. Let's bring in some food.
Has anyone ever told you you look like Enrique Iglesias?
Has anyone ever told you you look like Enrique Iglesias?
Has served our municipality for more than 12 years as city controller.
Has served our municipality for more than 12 years as city controller.
Has served this municipality as city controller for more than 12 years,
Has served this municipality as city controller for more than 12 years,
He can't do nothing from there.
He can't do nothing from there.
He had created the food and then got lots of followers.
He had created the food and then got lots of followers.
He is the white Obama
He is the white Obama
He never leaves us. He never forsakes us. He's here.
He never leaves us. He never forsakes us. He's here.
He pauses for an inordinate period of time.
He pauses for an inordinate period of time.
He put a hit on me. He took his clothes off.
He put a hit on me. He took his clothes off.
He says he's in a place with green trees and flowers.
He says he's in a place with green trees and flowers.
He says there's some sort of thing that you will set up, like a foundation or something,
He says there's some sort of thing that you will set up, like a foundation or something,
He's also mein stylist.
He's also mein stylist.
He's also mein stylist.
He's also mein stylist.
He's also my nutritionist.
He's also my nutritionist.
He's come to heal the world
He's come to heal the world
Head and eyes straight forward. Stand still, candidate.
Head and eyes straight forward. Stand still, candidate.
Hello, hello. Hey, can you come in?
Hello, hello. Hey, can you come in?
Hello, I apologise for the state of the room.
Hello, I apologise for the state of the room.
Hello?
Hello?
Hello? Engineering.
Hello? Engineering.
Helping other people is so vital to my life.
Helping other people is so vital to my life.
Her mixing the pots of acid and that type...
Her mixing the pots of acid and that type...
Here, you know.
Here, you know.
Hey, hey, he gay, he gay
Hey, hey, he gay, he gay
Hey, listen, you. What's your name? Hi. What's your name?
Hey, listen, you. What's your name? Hi. What's your name?
Hi. Hi. Great.
Hi. Hi. Great.
Hi. How are you?
Hi. How are you?
His personal debts compelled him to accept bribes.
His personal debts compelled him to accept bribes.
Hold on. Hold on. What's that?
Hold on. Hold on. What's that?
How did you get into it?
How did you get into it?
How do you defend yourself against the man with 2 dildos?
How do you defend yourself against the man with 2 dildos?
How do you protect yourself from a dildo?
How do you protect yourself from a dildo?
How do you spot the homosexual?
How do you spot the homosexual?
How important is it for you to help other people?
How important is it for you to help other people?
How would I become weltfamous?
How would I become weltfamous?
Hummus has nothing to do with Hamas. It's a food. Okay? We eat it. They eat it.
Hummus has nothing to do with Hamas. It's a food. Okay? We eat it. They eat it.
I actually got an interview mit Harrison Ford.
I actually got an interview mit Harrison Ford.
I ain't any one of them. I'm Donny.
I ain't any one of them. I'm Donny.
I am going to say something that is gonna get you so angry
I am going to say something that is gonna get you so angry
I am repulsed by the idea of making the sex with a woman.
I am repulsed by the idea of making the sex with a woman.
I am so straight that when I bought my house,
I am so straight that when I bought my house,
I am so straight that when I bought my house,
I am so straight that when I bought my house,
I am the Austrian Jesus
I am the Austrian Jesus
I am the host of Funkyzeit,
I am the host of Funkyzeit,
I can't wait to do this to a woman.
I can't wait to do this to a woman.
I couldn't even schtupp RuPaul.
I couldn't even schtupp RuPaul.
I did not press it.
I did not press it.
I did. I got you clean.
I did. I got you clean.
I didn't come here for no fucking queer shit. Okay?
I didn't come here for no fucking queer shit. Okay?
I don't care where you put them. Give them back.
I don't care where you put them. Give them back.
I don't even know why I'm asking that question.
I don't even know why I'm asking that question.
I don't know. What do you think?
I don't know. What do you think?
I don't like this little shit.
I don't like this little shit.
I don't like.
I don't like.
I don't need a beard.
I don't need a beard.
I don't need this motherfucker touching me on the back,
I don't need this motherfucker touching me on the back,
I don't want to be in your alley.
I don't want to be in your alley.
I don't want you to do something that you'll regret.
I don't want you to do something that you'll regret.
I feel a bit vulnerable.
I feel a bit vulnerable.
I feel this is the biggest step you'll ever make in your lifetime.
I feel this is the biggest step you'll ever make in your lifetime.
I go, and I sit down with your father, we talk about this.
I go, and I sit down with your father, we talk about this.
I gotta be honest. He's a real dick magnet.
I gotta be honest. He's a real dick magnet.
I gotta say, I love American people, and I love African American people.
I gotta say, I love American people, and I love African American people.
I guess to demonstrate how much you love the child.
I guess to demonstrate how much you love the child.
I have a dream for the Third World
I have a dream for the Third World
I have a second assistant, but ich can't remember its name.
I have a second assistant, but ich can't remember its name.
I hope not.
I hope not.
I just got off the phone with the network. They've agreed to do a screening.
I just got off the phone with the network. They've agreed to do a screening.
I live in Austria's coolest city, Vienna. No big deal. Whatever.
I live in Austria's coolest city, Vienna. No big deal. Whatever.
I love a woman with a vagina.
I love a woman with a vagina.
I love music.
I love music.
I mean, isn't pita bread the real enemy?
I mean, isn't pita bread the real enemy?
I said, get down! Do push ups.
I said, get down! Do push ups.
I see what the fuck you're doing, dude.
I see what the fuck you're doing, dude.
I should be chained to a 6'4" Norwegian with a PhD in sucking dick.
I should be chained to a 6'4" Norwegian with a PhD in sucking dick.
I swapped him.
I swapped him.
I think he was about, I don't know, 6 or...
I think he was about, I don't know, 6 or...
I think maybe because he's a black baby that might be your cue,
I think maybe because he's a black baby that might be your cue,
I think you're using him as an accessory.
I think you're using him as an accessory.
I wanna be a star.
I wanna be a star.
I wanna speak to Milli
I wanna speak to Milli
I want a charity that doesn't involve too much effort,
I want a charity that doesn't involve too much effort,
I want a charity that doesn't involve too much effort,
I want a charity that doesn't involve too much effort,
I want him to have fun with me.
I want him to have fun with me.
I want to hear the audio back. I want you to hear...
I want to hear the audio back. I want you to hear...
I want you to hear what this fool is saying.
I want you to hear what this fool is saying.
I wanted to poke my eyes out with hot needles.
I wanted to poke my eyes out with hot needles.
I was about to give up on my dream of celebrity,
I was about to give up on my dream of celebrity,
I was going to go to the salon that maintains Salma Hayek's inner thighs,
I was going to go to the salon that maintains Salma Hayek's inner thighs,
I was in the Middle East, like, solving the crisis there.
I was in the Middle East, like, solving the crisis there.
I would not become famous.
I would not become famous.
I... I don't marry 2 men or 2 women.
I... I don't marry 2 men or 2 women.
I'd be humping you like that.
I'd be humping you like that.
I'm 19 years old. And, of course, you'll know me as the host of Funkyzeit.
I'm 19 years old. And, of course, you'll know me as the host of Funkyzeit.
I'm afraid it gives me no pleasure at all to speak to you this afternoon.
I'm afraid it gives me no pleasure at all to speak to you this afternoon.
I'm from Austria.
I'm from Austria.
I'm gonna be the straightest man who's ever lived.
I'm gonna be the straightest man who's ever lived.
I'm gonna become straight. I'm gonna become uber straight.
I'm gonna become straight. I'm gonna become uber straight.
I'm gonna light some candles if it's okay.
I'm gonna light some candles if it's okay.
I'm here with Congressman Ron Paul,
I'm here with Congressman Ron Paul,
I'm hoping that I don't grow old alone. Am I right?
I'm hoping that I don't grow old alone. Am I right?
I'm hoping that I find Mr. Right. Am I right?
I'm hoping that I find Mr. Right. Am I right?
I'm like Bono, except much younger
I'm like Bono, except much younger
I'm not holding anything.
I'm not holding anything.
I'm pretty freaking flipping right now.
I'm pretty freaking flipping right now.
I'm so sorry. Gosh. What is he, about 2?
I'm so sorry. Gosh. What is he, about 2?
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. This is really not good.
I'm sorry. This is really not good.
I'm totally irresistible to gay guys. They see me und they want to schtupp me.
I'm totally irresistible to gay guys. They see me und they want to schtupp me.
I've got an idea. Let's play a little bit of dress up here.
I've got an idea. Let's play a little bit of dress up here.
I've never been out of the city before.
I've never been out of the city before.
I've written a song
I've written a song
I've written a song
I've written a song
I've written a song that I think is gonna help us make peace.
I've written a song that I think is gonna help us make peace.
Ich arrived in LA
Ich arrived in LA
Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace
Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace
Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace
Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace
Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace
Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace
Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace
Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace
Ich decided to seek advice from the wisest guy I'd ever known.
Ich decided to seek advice from the wisest guy I'd ever known.
Ich just needed to find a cock aholics anonymous.
Ich just needed to find a cock aholics anonymous.
Ich was at a low point. Bruno had hit rock Arsch.
Ich was at a low point. Bruno had hit rock Arsch.
Ich was encouraged to leave the Middle East.
Ich was encouraged to leave the Middle East.
Ich was going to be the biggest Austrian superstar since Hitler.
Ich was going to be the biggest Austrian superstar since Hitler.
Ich was going to become famous by solving a world problem.
Ich was going to become famous by solving a world problem.
Ich was out of options.
Ich was out of options.
Ich was ready to give up when I suddenly remembered something
Ich was ready to give up when I suddenly remembered something
Ich would become famous by getting kidnapped.
Ich would become famous by getting kidnapped.
If a terrorist has infiltrated a police department
If a terrorist has infiltrated a police department
If I did not get these queens to sign a peace deal soon,
If I did not get these queens to sign a peace deal soon,
If I'm having fun, I want little O.J. to come with me.
If I'm having fun, I want little O.J. to come with me.
If it does remind you of that, then I say put it down,
If it does remind you of that, then I say put it down,
If it doesn't remind you about some of the behaviour
If it doesn't remind you about some of the behaviour
If it doesn't remind you of that, then I say go for it
If it doesn't remind you of that, then I say go for it
If it looks better without the car seat...
If it looks better without the car seat...
If she's a man, then how did it give birth to our son?
If she's a man, then how did it give birth to our son?
If there's a problem losing the weight,
If there's a problem losing the weight,
If they get close to you, hit them and leave the situation.
If they get close to you, hit them and leave the situation.
If you don't want pussy, if you don't want fucking...
If you don't want pussy, if you don't want fucking...
If you sit on that one.
If you sit on that one.
If you was a woman, I would be humping you.
If you was a woman, I would be humping you.
In 2 days. I got them to pay for a focus group for the show.
In 2 days. I got them to pay for a focus group for the show.
In every village and every town
In every village and every town
In fact, Austrian fashionistas live their lives according to my "In or Out" list.
In fact, Austrian fashionistas live their lives according to my "In or Out" list.
In fact, I know it will.
In fact, I know it will.
In order for everyone... It's just a beneficial thing to be involved with now.
In order for everyone... It's just a beneficial thing to be involved with now.
In September 2008, I left for Milan Fashion Week
In September 2008, I left for Milan Fashion Week
In the last few years, people were kidnapped,
In the last few years, people were kidnapped,
In the next week, 7 days.
In the next week, 7 days.
Into an oven?
Into an oven?
Is he comfortable with dead or dying animals?
Is he comfortable with dead or dying animals?
Is he in heaven? And if so, is he in the VIP section there?
Is he in heaven? And if so, is he in the VIP section there?
Is it harder to defend against a black dildo?
Is it harder to defend against a black dildo?
Is only moments away. But first, some more dancing mit Bruno.
Is only moments away. But first, some more dancing mit Bruno.
Is she okay with extremely rapid acceleration?
Is she okay with extremely rapid acceleration?
Is that in, like, Iraqi or something like that?
Is that in, like, Iraqi or something like that?
Is that your boy? He's pretty.
Is that your boy? He's pretty.
Is there any music that I shouldn't listen to? Any bands?
Is there any music that I shouldn't listen to? Any bands?
Is there any way we can get something together enough to put it on?
Is there any way we can get something together enough to put it on?
Is there anywhere in the world that no celebrity has tried to fix?
Is there anywhere in the world that no celebrity has tried to fix?
Is there something that you, like, that you believe in?
Is there something that you, like, that you believe in?
Is this the dancing of a talentless idiot?
Is this the dancing of a talentless idiot?
Is what the guy just said on the phone.
Is what the guy just said on the phone.
Is your baby comfortable with bees, wasps and hornets?
Is your baby comfortable with bees, wasps and hornets?
Is your baby fine with antiquated heavy machinery?
Is your baby fine with antiquated heavy machinery?
It gives me no pleasure at all to speak to you this afternoon.
It gives me no pleasure at all to speak to you this afternoon.
It involved stopping off in Africa
It involved stopping off in Africa
It is, like, really difficult, you know,
It is, like, really difficult, you know,
It is. I was looking at it, and can I have one?
It is. I was looking at it, and can I have one?
It will be erotisch.
It will be erotisch.
It's called Future Kinder. People who are pregnant,
It's called Future Kinder. People who are pregnant,
It's full of Africans. It's full of people of African descent.
It's full of Africans. It's full of people of African descent.
It's great not to have any fags here.
It's great not to have any fags here.
It's great to have an evening with straight people.
It's great to have an evening with straight people.
It's ironic that you should have amazing blow job lips.
It's ironic that you should have amazing blow job lips.
It's kind of like terrorists.
It's kind of like terrorists.
It's like the air that I breathe and the water that I drink.
It's like the air that I breathe and the water that I drink.
It's my favourite.
It's my favourite.
It's my one on one, exclusive interview mit Harrison Ford.
It's my one on one, exclusive interview mit Harrison Ford.
It's time for this war to end
It's time for this war to end
It's vegetarian. It's healthy. It's beans.
It's vegetarian. It's healthy. It's beans.
Jamie Lynn Spears. I mean, is she a celebrity?
Jamie Lynn Spears. I mean, is she a celebrity?
**** and Hindus, you be friends
**** and Hindus, you be friends
Just because he was brave enough to try something new.
Just because he was brave enough to try something new.
Kick his ass!
Kick his ass!
Know each other? What?
Know each other? What?
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
Let him in.
Let him in.
Let me have a look at those.
Let me have a look at those.
Let me hear you say straight pride.
Let me hear you say straight pride.
Let me hear you say that.
Let me hear you say that.
Let me introduce you to somebody. Captain Miles.
Let me introduce you to somebody. Captain Miles.
Let me stop for 2 minutes. Let me stop you right there.
Let me stop for 2 minutes. Let me stop you right there.
Let's maybe we get to know each other a little.
Let's maybe we get to know each other a little.
Let's say the homosexual has got you on the ground.
Let's say the homosexual has got you on the ground.
Let's see the next picture.
Let's see the next picture.
Let's try and get a solution, right?
Let's try and get a solution, right?
Like how some people walk in the park with dogs to pick up girls,
Like how some people walk in the park with dogs to pick up girls,
Like that. You know?
Like that. You know?
Like, after us, in order to help for our future.
Like, after us, in order to help for our future.
Like, I'm sitting here, and...
Like, I'm sitting here, and...
Listen, I don't see how you can even walk out of here with that baby in your hands
Listen, I don't see how you can even walk out of here with that baby in your hands
Lloyd, hi. How are you?
Lloyd, hi. How are you?
Lloyd, we need to distract him
Lloyd, we need to distract him
Look at the 4 of us. We are so like the Sex and the City girls.
Look at the 4 of us. We are so like the Sex and the City girls.
Look like a straight guy, how's that?
Look like a straight guy, how's that?
Look me in the eye. You can do this.
Look me in the eye. You can do this.
Looks like a kind of dirty wizard or a homeless Santa.
Looks like a kind of dirty wizard or a homeless Santa.
Lose the beards, because your King Osama
Lose the beards, because your King Osama
Luckily, there was still one shithole left to fix,
Luckily, there was still one shithole left to fix,
Lutz had gone, und ich had only 9 Freunds left on MeinSpace.
Lutz had gone, und ich had only 9 Freunds left on MeinSpace.
Lutz!
Lutz!
Lutz! Lutz!
Lutz! Lutz!
Lutz! Lutz! Start the car!
Lutz! Lutz! Start the car!
Lutz.
Lutz.
Make some noise, everybody. Put your hands together. Make some noise
Make some noise, everybody. Put your hands together. Make some noise
Make the bed!
Make the bed!
Make this bed. Hurry up. Make the bed.
Make this bed. Hurry up. Make the bed.
Makes you think of all the hot guys in the world.
Makes you think of all the hot guys in the world.
Man, there's nothing like just working out
Man, there's nothing like just working out
Maximum Santzgaut!
Maximum Santzgaut!
Maybe show a bit of skin or something like that.
Maybe show a bit of skin or something like that.
Me und Lloyd, we haven't actually spoke since the other day
Me und Lloyd, we haven't actually spoke since the other day
Me, either, definitely.
Me, either, definitely.
Mein little afrikanischer Freund was going to get me
Mein little afrikanischer Freund was going to get me
Mein Plan was to get both sides to sign a peace deal in front of the world's press,
Mein Plan was to get both sides to sign a peace deal in front of the world's press,
Minimum Santzgaut.
Minimum Santzgaut.
Mit a pygmy flight attendant called Diesel.
Mit a pygmy flight attendant called Diesel.
Mit everyone in the Euro fashion world.
Mit everyone in the Euro fashion world.
Modelling, a lot of people think it's easy.
Modelling, a lot of people think it's easy.
Most likely.
Most likely.
Move that out of my... No, Lutz.
Move that out of my... No, Lutz.
My favourite.
My favourite.
My song hadn't worked, und I didn't have enough ecstasy for everyone.
My song hadn't worked, und I didn't have enough ecstasy for everyone.
My stinker is slightly burning. Is that normal?
My stinker is slightly burning. Is that normal?
Newsflash, you're in a C lister's womb. Am I right?
Newsflash, you're in a C lister's womb. Am I right?
No big deal. Whatever.
No big deal. Whatever.
No logical person would consider a show like this
No logical person would consider a show like this
No photos, please. Do you want another Diana on your hands?
No photos, please. Do you want another Diana on your hands?
No, actually, his name is Jesus. Jesus is in this room right now.
No, actually, his name is Jesus. Jesus is in this room right now.
No, but I refuse to pay for Mr. Magorium's Wunderbar Emporium.
No, but I refuse to pay for Mr. Magorium's Wunderbar Emporium.
No, fool.
No, fool.
No, I can't do this.
No, I can't do this.
No, I'm afraid we are not gonna be doing that.
No, I'm afraid we are not gonna be doing that.
No, I'm not.
No, I'm not.
No, it's just a beard.
No, it's just a beard.
No, let's do this the right way.
No, let's do this the right way.
No, lotion.
No, lotion.
No, no, no.
No, no, no.
No, they were made for something else, but you're just not using it for them.
No, they were made for something else, but you're just not using it for them.
No, they're called African Americans, girlfriend.
No, they're called African Americans, girlfriend.
No, we aren't, either.
No, we aren't, either.
No.
No.
No. African Americans are here.
No. African Americans are here.
No. No.
No. No.
No. That's a racist thing to call them. African Americans is the right word.
No. That's a racist thing to call them. African Americans is the right word.
No. This is not what was supposed to be going on in here.
No. This is not what was supposed to be going on in here.
Not just any iPod.
Not just any iPod.
Not yet.
Not yet.
Now, can you just look under that shelf...
Now, can you just look under that shelf...
Now, I think that would be... That's something to get involved now,
Now, I think that would be... That's something to get involved now,
Now, our next guest is a single parent. Please welcome Bruno.
Now, our next guest is a single parent. Please welcome Bruno.
Nowhere in the script does it say
Nowhere in the script does it say
O.J.
O.J.
O.J., you're going to be on television.
O.J., you're going to be on television.
O.J.!
O.J.!
O.J.! Give me my baby back!
O.J.! Give me my baby back!
O.J.! Give me my baby! Give me my...
O.J.! Give me my baby! Give me my...
Obvious is a person that's being extremely nice to them to start with.
Obvious is a person that's being extremely nice to them to start with.
Of all nights for us to swing, the first time was for our honeymoon.
Of all nights for us to swing, the first time was for our honeymoon.
Of course not. You're much cuter.
Of course not. You're much cuter.
Of course, the Village People.
Of course, the Village People.
Of course. Of course.
Of course. Of course.
Of course. Of course.
Of course. Of course.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Okay, but... Okay. Okay.
Okay, but... Okay. Okay.
Okay, good, 'cause I just... That was, like, really hot, that whole speech.
Okay, good, 'cause I just... That was, like, really hot, that whole speech.
Okay, great.
Okay, great.
Okay, let's see what she's got in her stomach.
Okay, let's see what she's got in her stomach.
Okay, so this is the part of the show,
Okay, so this is the part of the show,
Okay, that's a great idea, 'cause if I do that, then I'll definitely become world famous.
Okay, that's a great idea, 'cause if I do that, then I'll definitely become world famous.
Okay, well, listen, one other thing.
Okay, well, listen, one other thing.
Okay? Kick around, boom.
Okay? Kick around, boom.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay. Help!
Okay. Help!
Okay. Thank you very much. Fantastisch.
Okay. Thank you very much. Fantastisch.
Okay. Well, I understand that you took a look at a side
Okay. Well, I understand that you took a look at a side
On the cover of every magazine.
On the cover of every magazine.
On the way home for a little bit of shopping.
On the way home for a little bit of shopping.
Once again, "Can you take my finger, your finger out of my ass,"
Once again, "Can you take my finger, your finger out of my ass,"
Once you put the...
Once you put the...
Once, for 7 minutes with Milli from Milli und Vanilli. No big deal. Whatever.
Once, for 7 minutes with Milli from Milli und Vanilli. No big deal. Whatever.
One is just as easy as the other to defend against.
One is just as easy as the other to defend against.
One of the balls?
One of the balls?
One that was, like, limited edition, red. A U2 iPod. Heard of it?
One that was, like, limited edition, red. A U2 iPod. Heard of it?
Play it back. Talking about what? His asshole.
Play it back. Talking about what? His asshole.
Please welcome Shatonya Miggins from the State Child Services Department.
Please welcome Shatonya Miggins from the State Child Services Department.
Please, can you unlock us?
Please, can you unlock us?
Please, this is my career. I put all my money into this.
Please, this is my career. I put all my money into this.
Please, where you going?
Please, where you going?
Please. My assistant's about to shit on my balls.
Please. My assistant's about to shit on my balls.
Pretty cool, right?
Pretty cool, right?
Puffy Vater?
Puffy Vater?
Pushing a wheelbarrow with another baby as a Jew in it into an oven.
Pushing a wheelbarrow with another baby as a Jew in it into an oven.
Put down your guns and bombs
Put down your guns and bombs
Put your shoulders back. This is a fashion show, not a slave auction.
Put your shoulders back. This is a fashion show, not a slave auction.
Put your shoulders back. This is a fashion show, not a slave auction.
Put your shoulders back. This is a fashion show, not a slave auction.
Really loosens you up.
Really loosens you up.
Really wonderful things.
Really wonderful things.
Reese Witterspinzel?
Reese Witterspinzel?
Reverend BJ found me too much of a handful
Reverend BJ found me too much of a handful
Right leg again, and then, like, the left one. And then sometimes you even have to turn.
Right leg again, and then, like, the left one. And then sometimes you even have to turn.
Robert.
Robert.
Save Dafar?
Save Dafar?
Saving some kind of extinct animal. What's going extinct right now?
Saving some kind of extinct animal. What's going extinct right now?
Set.
Set.
Sharing stories and saying how much we enjoy them.
Sharing stories and saying how much we enjoy them.
She must have a lot of hair.
She must have a lot of hair.
She's about 30 pounds.
She's about 30 pounds.
She's got her arms up like she's a A lister.
She's got her arms up like she's a A lister.
She's just washing my Arschwitz.
She's just washing my Arschwitz.
Shoot a Christian
Shoot a Christian
Should have 2 parents.
Should have 2 parents.
Show me. I'll pretend to be the woman.
Show me. I'll pretend to be the woman.
Since I was, you know, 4 years old.
Since I was, you know, 4 years old.
Sinead O'Connor. The Indigo Girls.
Sinead O'Connor. The Indigo Girls.
Sir Officer Candidate, did you just call me "she"?
Sir Officer Candidate, did you just call me "she"?
Sir Officer Candidate, you deserve a medal for exceptional skin.
Sir Officer Candidate, you deserve a medal for exceptional skin.
Sit the fuck down. Don't fuck around!
Sit the fuck down. Don't fuck around!
Sit the fuck down. Take it off!
Sit the fuck down. Take it off!
So I decided to think outside the Geschwindigkeitsbegrenzung.
So I decided to think outside the Geschwindigkeitsbegrenzung.
So I was pained to learn that his debts
So I was pained to learn that his debts
So I was very pained to learn that
So I was very pained to learn that
So I wore the jewel of mein wardrobe, a suit made entirely out of Velcro.
So I wore the jewel of mein wardrobe, a suit made entirely out of Velcro.
So if someone approaches you in the street und is being very, very nice to you,
So if someone approaches you in the street und is being very, very nice to you,
So if you could describe this show in one sentence...
So if you could describe this show in one sentence...
So let's say I'm trying...
So let's say I'm trying...
So my name's Bruno. I was born in Klagenfurt.
So my name's Bruno. I was born in Klagenfurt.
So tell me, who are you wearing?
So tell me, who are you wearing?
So was the founder of Hamas a chef?
So was the founder of Hamas a chef?
So we're making progress.
So we're making progress.
So what, the whole world gets to see
So what, the whole world gets to see
So what? You're travelling fast. You're not gonna kill it.
So what? You're travelling fast. You're not gonna kill it.
So what's doggy style like?
So what's doggy style like?
So what's the baby's name?
So what's the baby's name?
So you don't put any woodwind instruments up your Arschwitz.
So you don't put any woodwind instruments up your Arschwitz.
So you have to make sure your walk is good. And, yeah.
So you have to make sure your walk is good. And, yeah.
So you were never gay?
So you were never gay?
So, again, if I am a homosexual,
So, again, if I am a homosexual,
So, we can just help ease the...
So, we can just help ease the...
So, you probably already know, today we're going to be looking at a new TV show,
So, you probably already know, today we're going to be looking at a new TV show,
So. We're looking for 2 thieves to be on the crucifixes next to my baby.
So. We're looking for 2 thieves to be on the crucifixes next to my baby.
Somewhat, that you find tolerable or interesting
Somewhat, that you find tolerable or interesting
Sorry.
Sorry.
Stand at the position of attention, candidate.
Stand at the position of attention, candidate.
Stand up, please.
Stand up, please.
Stevie Wunderbar?
Stevie Wunderbar?
Sting's got the Amazon, and Bono's got AIDS.
Sting's got the Amazon, and Bono's got AIDS.
Stop fighting, North and South Korea
Stop fighting, North and South Korea
Stop! Stop!
Stop! Stop!
Sure.
Sure.
Sure.
Sure.
Sure. Thank you.
Sure. Thank you.
Swapped the baby for what?
Swapped the baby for what?
Take it off! Now!
Take it off! Now!
Take the baby.
Take the baby.
Telephone.
Telephone.
Tell him we don't have no faggots here in Arkansas. Take that shit somewhere else.
Tell him we don't have no faggots here in Arkansas. Take that shit somewhere else.
Telling me to look him in the fucking eye. Right?
Telling me to look him in the fucking eye. Right?
Thank you.
Thank you.
That guy is queerer than the blazes. He took his clothes off. Let's get going.
That guy is queerer than the blazes. He took his clothes off. Let's get going.
That I hope is gonna bring the world together
That I hope is gonna bring the world together
That I hope is gonna bring you two together
That I hope is gonna bring you two together
That I should do if I want to become straight?
That I should do if I want to become straight?
That I wanted you to think about from the Jerry Maguire show.
That I wanted you to think about from the Jerry Maguire show.
That I was able to record mein very own charity video.
That I was able to record mein very own charity video.
That I'm torn in my Arschenholer.
That I'm torn in my Arschenholer.
That if you've got a gun on you, you're gonna pull it out
That if you've got a gun on you, you're gonna pull it out
That is not part of the uniform, candidate. You need to take that off.
That is not part of the uniform, candidate. You need to take that off.
That is such a Samantha thing to say.
That is such a Samantha thing to say.
That is why I was very pained to learn...
That is why I was very pained to learn...
That is, like, it's my own thing.
That is, like, it's my own thing.
That might be your cue to get maybe a down low brother.
That might be your cue to get maybe a down low brother.
That the Jude had said.
That the Jude had said.
That they complain so much.
That they complain so much.
That was great.
That was great.
That was my boy. He got taken away today.
That was my boy. He got taken away today.
That would be missionary or reverse cowgirl.
That would be missionary or reverse cowgirl.
That you engaged in when you put your lips around it.
That you engaged in when you put your lips around it.
That, at first glance, are annoying and irritating.
That, at first glance, are annoying and irritating.
That... I wouldn't do that either because it would remind you of the former lifestyle.
That... I wouldn't do that either because it would remind you of the former lifestyle.
That's actually mine.
That's actually mine.
That's cool. It's kind of like that Madonna video.
That's cool. It's kind of like that Madonna video.
That's exactly right. He's amazing.
That's exactly right. He's amazing.
That's just totally different than what I've ever tried to, you know, work with.
That's just totally different than what I've ever tried to, you know, work with.
That's not a salute.
That's not a salute.
That's not gonna really work though, because you need the...
That's not gonna really work though, because you need the...
That's not my concern.
That's not my concern.
That's not the baby's name, is it?
That's not the baby's name, is it?
That's right. It's the time you've all been waiting for.
That's right. It's the time you've all been waiting for.
That's so bad. Never mind. I was gonna say make bracelets out of a...
That's so bad. Never mind. I was gonna say make bracelets out of a...
That's some mess.
That's some mess.
That's the first shot.
That's the first shot.
That's unfortunate.
That's unfortunate.
The biggest gay movie star since Schwarzenegger.
The biggest gay movie star since Schwarzenegger.
The defendant, as you know,
The defendant, as you know,
The end bit was Lloyd's idea.
The end bit was Lloyd's idea.
The first thing I did was brick up the back door.
The first thing I did was brick up the back door.
The footage went everywhere, und Bruno became uber famous.
The footage went everywhere, und Bruno became uber famous.
The important thing is to be around women,
The important thing is to be around women,
The last bit was? Lloyd's?
The last bit was? Lloyd's?
The Middle earth.
The Middle earth.
The network's obviously gonna be very interested. So take a look.
The network's obviously gonna be very interested. So take a look.
The OC guide states that I will not use profanity while I'm at OCS.
The OC guide states that I will not use profanity while I'm at OCS.
The women, eh? Do you prefer the vagina or the mammary glands?
The women, eh? Do you prefer the vagina or the mammary glands?
The world had turned on Austria's greatest man
The world had turned on Austria's greatest man
Then, yeah, we'd have to do that.
Then, yeah, we'd have to do that.
There is a relation between Hamas and hummus?
There is a relation between Hamas and hummus?
There we go.
There we go.
There you go. Now there's wax in there.
There you go. Now there's wax in there.
There's missionary, doggy style.
There's missionary, doggy style.
There's no ice bucket, but I know a good place to put it.
There's no ice bucket, but I know a good place to put it.
There's so many stars in the sky.
There's so many stars in the sky.
There's something that he could do that could make me incredibly happy.
There's something that he could do that could make me incredibly happy.
These are our Mexican chair people.
These are our Mexican chair people.
They probably would attack from behind.
They probably would attack from behind.
They say that after a waxing, there's enough to stuff a mattress.
They say that after a waxing, there's enough to stuff a mattress.
They were all straight.
They were all straight.
They're exhausted after they wax Salma Hayek?
They're exhausted after they wax Salma Hayek?
They're good even though
They're good even though
They're often talking about one thing and then another and then another,
They're often talking about one thing and then another and then another,
Things have got to change. I want to become straight.
Things have got to change. I want to become straight.
This child is here illegally.
This child is here illegally.
This is a fucking swingers party. Right, guys?
This is a fucking swingers party. Right, guys?
This is a prototype. It's a Velcro suit made by Frederic Worms.
This is a prototype. It's a Velcro suit made by Frederic Worms.
This is about gaining something for your own people
This is about gaining something for your own people
This is cowgirl.
This is cowgirl.
This is in Egypt. Not in Palestine.
This is in Egypt. Not in Palestine.
This is TAC Alley. TAC Officer's...
This is TAC Alley. TAC Officer's...
This is the Middle East
This is the Middle East
This line right here is a line that you don't cross.
This line right here is a line that you don't cross.
This one here is cowgirl or reverse cowgirl?
This one here is cowgirl or reverse cowgirl?
This outfit is too matchy matchy as it is,
This outfit is too matchy matchy as it is,
This way.
This way.
Through Funkyzeit, ich have done interviews
Through Funkyzeit, ich have done interviews
To become famous, I would have to quit guys.
To become famous, I would have to quit guys.
To get your baby from? Is your baby from Australia?
To get your baby from? Is your baby from Australia?
To put your right leg forward and then put your left leg forward
To put your right leg forward and then put your left leg forward
To shoot a new season of Funkyzeit.
To shoot a new season of Funkyzeit.
Tom Cruise, John Travolta, Kevin Spacey, they all had one thing in common.
Tom Cruise, John Travolta, Kevin Spacey, they all had one thing in common.
Trap it, work the knees. Work the elbows.
Trap it, work the knees. Work the elbows.
True that. True that.
True that. True that.
Und cunningly avoided being snapped by the waiting paparazzi.
Und cunningly avoided being snapped by the waiting paparazzi.
Und disarm the dildo?
Und disarm the dildo?
Und held a casting for the hottest baby photo shoot ever.
Und held a casting for the hottest baby photo shoot ever.
Und now, my exclusive interview mit Harrison Ford
Und now, my exclusive interview mit Harrison Ford
Und the homosexual, you know, has got you down here.
Und the homosexual, you know, has got you down here.
Und then I'll be famous. You'll see. You'll see.
Und then I'll be famous. You'll see. You'll see.
Und what about if I put a flute up my stinker?
Und what about if I put a flute up my stinker?
Und what is your favourite position?
Und what is your favourite position?
Und what other positions are there?
Und what other positions are there?
Unless they had some sort of a mental or moral defect.
Unless they had some sort of a mental or moral defect.
Vaginas. The woman's vagina.
Vaginas. The woman's vagina.
Very good. You've got great hair actually.
Very good. You've got great hair actually.
Very hard to do.
Very hard to do.
Wait. Get me out of this. Get me out of this.
Wait. Get me out of this. Get me out of this.
War's just based on hate and fear
War's just based on hate and fear
Was it Karl Lagerfeld?
Was it Karl Lagerfeld?
We both agree that hummus is very healthy.
We both agree that hummus is very healthy.
We have chosen your baby to be dressed as a Nazi officer
We have chosen your baby to be dressed as a Nazi officer
We need many of the things
We need many of the things
We need to rid the world of hunger
We need to rid the world of hunger
We were happy. We had each other.
We were happy. We had each other.
We were just talking about vaginas.
We were just talking about vaginas.
We weren't gonna let it get us down.
We weren't gonna let it get us down.
We won't go there, please.
We won't go there, please.
We, actually, our first time was on our...
We, actually, our first time was on our...
We'll get out, but don't push me.
We'll get out, but don't push me.
We're going to put them up on this screen.
We're going to put them up on this screen.
We're gonna do like this religious theme
We're gonna do like this religious theme
We're just like an ordinary couple, you know, boring, stay at home types.
We're just like an ordinary couple, you know, boring, stay at home types.
We're leaving.
We're leaving.
We've managed to get the ultrasound photos.
We've managed to get the ultrasound photos.
Welcome back to Today with Richard Bey.
Welcome back to Today with Richard Bey.
Well, do you both agree on that?
Well, do you both agree on that?
Well, honey, you need to get it together. Sugar, you're lost and confused.
Well, honey, you need to get it together. Sugar, you're lost and confused.
Well, I don't even know because it's pretty conventional.
Well, I don't even know because it's pretty conventional.
Well, I'm really into issues.
Well, I'm really into issues.
Well, it is full of African Americans.
Well, it is full of African Americans.
Well, no, it's 2 guys handcuffed together on a bed.
Well, no, it's 2 guys handcuffed together on a bed.
Well, off and on throughout the years. This last year, a tremendous amount.
Well, off and on throughout the years. This last year, a tremendous amount.
Well, that would... That would be bad.
Well, that would... That would be bad.
Well, there's always 2. There's always 2.
Well, there's always 2. There's always 2.
Well, these lips were made to praise Jesus.
Well, these lips were made to praise Jesus.
Well...
Well...
What are obvious things that we can look for?
What are obvious things that we can look for?
What are you talking... What are you trying to say, candidate?
What are you talking... What are you trying to say, candidate?
What do you mean by that?
What do you mean by that?
What do you mean by that?
What do you mean by that?
What does it look like, Paul Blart?
What does it look like, Paul Blart?
What is that?
What is that?
What is this? You gonna dress me like a man?
What is this? You gonna dress me like a man?
What sick human being came up with something like this?
What sick human being came up with something like this?
What type belt is that, candidate?
What type belt is that, candidate?
What would be the opinion, the legal opinion of the state,
What would be the opinion, the legal opinion of the state,
What?
What?
What? I'm not coming.
What? I'm not coming.
What's going on here?
What's going on here?
What's reverse cowgirl?
What's reverse cowgirl?
What's that?
What's that?
What's this shit? Let's take this off.
What's this shit? Let's take this off.
What's up with the scarf?
What's up with the scarf?
What's up, Arkansas? How's everybody doing?
What's up, Arkansas? How's everybody doing?
What's up? I'm Bruno.
What's up? I'm Bruno.
When did you have the baby?
When did you have the baby?
When I become straight, you know, a Kuntmeister,
When I become straight, you know, a Kuntmeister,
When I was getting my anus bleached.
When I was getting my anus bleached.
Where are you from?
Where are you from?
Where I'll be surrounded just by straight guys?
Where I'll be surrounded just by straight guys?
Where my baby is gonna be on a crucifix playing Jesus
Where my baby is gonna be on a crucifix playing Jesus
Where there will be other people involved that will benefit.
Where there will be other people involved that will benefit.
Which is empowered to look after children and their welfare?
Which is empowered to look after children and their welfare?
Which one are you, Donny?
Which one are you, Donny?
Who called me a faggot?
Who called me a faggot?
Who called Straight Dave a faggot? Come up here.
Who called Straight Dave a faggot? Come up here.
Who want to come out of the homosexual lifestyle and make a change in their lives.
Who want to come out of the homosexual lifestyle and make a change in their lives.
Who wants me to beat this...
Who wants me to beat this...
Who wants to see me beat this fag's ass?
Who wants to see me beat this fag's ass?
Who was the 2008 presidential candidate.
Who was the 2008 presidential candidate.
Who's got the audio?
Who's got the audio?
Who's ready for an old fashioned heterofest?
Who's ready for an old fashioned heterofest?
Who's ready to max out with loads of celebrities? I am.
Who's ready to max out with loads of celebrities? I am.
Whoever called me a faggot come up here, and I'll beat your Arsch.
Whoever called me a faggot come up here, and I'll beat your Arsch.
Why are you so anti hummus?
Why are you so anti hummus?
Why is autism so cool at the moment?
Why is autism so cool at the moment?
Why not? Come on. Whatever.
Why not? Come on. Whatever.
Why would he look you in the eyes when he's looking at a pussy?
Why would he look you in the eyes when he's looking at a pussy?
Wilhelm Schmidt?
Wilhelm Schmidt?
Without someone stopping you and taking that baby out of your possession.
Without someone stopping you and taking that baby out of your possession.
Women are good for us.
Women are good for us.
Worse. I think, like, D.
Worse. I think, like, D.
Would she be fine to operate them?
Would she be fine to operate them?
Would you be ready for your baby to be strung up on a crucifix next to mine?
Would you be ready for your baby to be strung up on a crucifix next to mine?
Would you be ready to have Olivia undergo liposuction?
Would you be ready to have Olivia undergo liposuction?
Would you quit being a little bitch here
Would you quit being a little bitch here
Yeah, a bit more than that.
Yeah, a bit more than that.
Yeah, and so, if I'm the woman... Don't worry. Yeah, so what?
Yeah, and so, if I'm the woman... Don't worry. Yeah, so what?
Yeah, Brian, I need you up here on 20 immediately.
Yeah, Brian, I need you up here on 20 immediately.
Yeah, if you sit here.
Yeah, if you sit here.
Yeah, it's really edgy. You know, we're turning it on its head.
Yeah, it's really edgy. You know, we're turning it on its head.
Yeah, it's really hard, 'cause you've gotta remember, like,
Yeah, it's really hard, 'cause you've gotta remember, like,
Yeah, she's fine. She's been around that.
Yeah, she's fine. She's been around that.

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