Turbo (2013) Edit

A little far from home aren't you, garden snail?

A nice, comfy deck chair on the 5.5'. Thea!

A snail in the Indy 500.

Accidental smushes were down 15 percent.

Actually, I've been doing a lot of research,

Adrenalode, not legal in Utah and South Dakota.

Ah. yeah!

All my life, I've defended you, covered for you,

All my life.

All of these people, they believe in me.

All racers to the starting line.

All right, all right, knock it off.

All right, as the kids say, Time to plump your ride.

All right, go, go. so!

All right, good hustle.

All right, I know, I know!

All right, let's chow down!

All right, people, we got a lot of tomatoes to harvest today.

All right, people, you know the drill.

All right, so, you got a new shell.

All right, team meeting. Bring it in.

All right, team.

All right!

All right.

All right. Game over, nut job.

All right. Tout suite, let's go.

All right. You're good to go.

All we have to do is raise the $20,000 registration fee.

Almost everybody.

Am I dead? Is this heaven?

Amazing, right?

Amazing! Unbelievable!

And a nut so taco man who is using you to sell Mexican food?

And by the way, my name is Turbo.

And do what?

And down the front stretch.

And down the homestretch, the crowd goes wild!

And dreamers?

And even if they did, you wouldn't survive one lap.

And for me, it's terrifying, terrifying blazing speed.

And Guy Gagné wins the pole,

And here he comes, folks, le man, le myth, le legend...

And here he comes, folks, le man, le myth, le legend...

And I know some people may say I'm crazy.

And I tell you what, I do lave a good torta.

And I won't be able to save you.

And I'm Burn. Sizzle, sizzle, uh uh.

And it is my mission in life to share your gift with the world.

And it looks like the winner is Turbo!

And it looks like the winner is...

And last, but not least, Sanitation.

And my little brother never gives up.

And next up an our tour is the L.A. River.

And next up an our tour is the L.A. River.

And once again, it's Turbo out front.

And put all that racing nonsense behind you.

And Snail Who Seems To Be Friends With Little Amigo.

And so begins another wonderful work week at the plant.

And so, after careful consideration and...

And so, in preparation for Crow Awareness Week,

And take a ride of a lifetime.

And that is why I, for one,

And the cars are at the starting line.

And the cars are at the starting line.

And the race is an!

And the sooner you accept the dull, miserable reality of your existence,

And there they are, folks. Some of the biggest names in motorsport.

And there's Claudio Cruz, a.k.a. The Brazilian Butcher.

And there's Claudio Cruz, a.k.a. The Brazilian Butcher.

And there's nothing in the rules that says a snail can't enter the race.

And Turbo wins it by a shell!

And we'd all be happy to see you come an down to the Starlight Plaza.

And we're back at the final stretch of the Indianapolis 500.

And we're back with more from Indianapolis.

And welcome to this year's running of the Indianapolis 500.

And when the checkered flag drops, they'll be watching me win.

And would you look at those t shirts?

And you don't want to play with these marbles, kids.

And, hey, if we did better because of that billboard,

Angelo, please.

Angelo...

Any day now.

Any day now.

Are you a boy, or a girl?

Are you a car?

Are you crazy?

Are you even listening to yourself, Tito?

Are you insane?

Are you kidding me?

Are you radioactive, homie?

Are you ready, big man?

As soon as we get home, we're gonna get you fixed.

Aye aye, Captain!

Bad idea. Bad idea.

Banzai!

Barbeque sauce!

Because I'm so fast, all you see is my shadow.

Because if that's your plan, then whoopty skippy do, sign me up!

Because if you want one for yourself, you may have a long wait.

Because of you, the whole world will be watching this race.

Believe that if the Indy 500 isn't going to put a limit on speed,

Big day, indeed.

Big Red!

Big Red.

Boo? What does that even mean?

Boom!

Boom! Check out my well designed endorsement poster.

Breathe.

Brenda, that daisy really brings out your foot!

Bring it on.

Burn. Let's get this party started.

But can yours do this? Hit it, Burn!

But how is that supposed to help us sell tacos?

But I say, when a snail crawls into your life at 200 miles an hour,

But if you'd just let me explain...

But most importantly, we got to be...

But that doesn't mean it's ever gonna happen.

But this, Tito? This is in a category all by itself.

But what really separates the racers from the champions...

But what's this?

But you're amazing, Little Amigo. Amazing!

Bye.

Bye. Come again. I do weddings, bar mitzvahs.

Can I help you, monsieur?

Can't get no better.

Can't tuck. I can't tuck!

Check it out.

Check it out. We're on TV.

Chet, will you calm down? There is no reason to panic.

Chet!

Chet!

Chet!

Chet! Chet!

Chet?

Chet?

Chet. I'm so sorry.

Chug! Chug! Chug!

Come back to me, TV!

Come for the snail racing, stay for the chimichangas.

Come on, boys. It's time to take out the trash.

Come on, Chet. Just hear me out.

Come on, come on!

Come on, come on!

Come on, come on. Now, hurry up.

Come on, garden snail. Get your head in the game!

Come on, get up.

Come on, just hold in there a little longer.

Come on, phony glasses, do your thing.

Come on, Turbo. Come on, Turbo.

Come on! Come on!

Come on! Stop it!

Come on! This is me!

Come on! We're supposed to be a team, here!

Come on.

Coming through!

Coming through!

Coming through!

Coming to getcha! I'm coming to getcha!

Crawl home, garden snail,

Crazy awesome.

Crows? Are you kidding me?

Despite a rocky start, it looks like Turbo is gaining some ground.

Detailing.

Did anybody bring earplugs?

Did he really just kiss you goodnight?

Did I say something humorous?

Did you ever dream that you'd be standing here today?

Did you hear that, Chet? This guy believes in me.

Did you see that?

Did you see that? She cut me off!

Do not exceed more than two cans of Adrenalode in a 24 hour period.

Do not expose Adrenalode to flame, or to water, or to sand.

Do you see that sign? What does it say?

Does he ever stop to think, Maybe I've caught enough gazelles.

Don't even think about it.

Don't want any accidents.

Don't worry, Little Amigo. We'll get that entrance fee somehow.

Don't you worry your chubby little face about that.

Dos Bros Tacos and Company.

Dos Bros Tacos and Monkey Petting Zoo. That was crazy.

Dos Bros Tacos and Sushi. That was crazy.

Dos Bros, Tito. Not UnoBro.

Dragged down with you on your sinking ship.

Drive around in circles for hours on end?

Driving his trademark number one overripe tomato.

Easy now, fellas. You really don't wanna do this.

Easy to the peasy, baby.

Enough talk. it's time for action.

Espresso?

Everybody in! it's go time!

Everyone, off the track, please.

Everything's gonna be fine, okay? We can do this, right?

Everything's gonna be just fine.

Fall behind, or push ahead.

Famous for its appearance in such movies as...

Famous for its appearance...

Farewell, little snail.

Fastest open wheel, single seat machine on the planet.

Finally.

Finish this!

Flea markets. No, farmers' markets. No, supermarkets.

Followed by Claudio Cruz, Shelby Stone and Takao Noguchi.

Foot massage.

For once, one of your crazy schemes worked.

Forget about it. This will blow over by noon.

Free tacos for everybody!

Fresh air, baby.

Gagné is in the marbles!

Gagné rolls into the lead around the first turn

Gagné with a commanding lead now.

Gagné, just five laps a way from victory.

Gagné.

Gagné's in the top pole position,

Gentlemen, start your engines.

Gentlemen, start your engines.

Get back here! No, wait!

Get in that truck and go sell some tacos.

Get off the track!

Get off!

Get on the floor.

Get set.

Get your head out of the clouds, Tito. It's enough with your crazy schemes.

Get yourself set...

Get! Get out!

Give the kid some space.

Give the people what they want.

Go, go, go!

Go, go, go! Left turn! Left turn!

Go, T boogie, go!

Go, Turbo!

Go!

Go!

Go!

Go! Come on.

Go.

Good afternoon and welcome

Good afternoon, race fans,

Good hustle, everybody!

Good luck with that snail of yours.

Good night, Jim! Night, Sally!

Goodnight, Tito.

Granted, yes,

Great. Then first thing in the morning,

Guy Gagné believes in me.

Guy Gagné is gaining an the pack.

Guy Gagné!

Guy, how do you do it, shattering your own records year after year?

Guy, what are you doing?

Guy, when you were just a rookie starting out in the Indy Lights,

Has he passed the rookie test?

Has the world lost its mind?

Have a nice flight, Chet.

He actually was a butcher before he got into race car driving.

He actually was a butcher before he got into race car driving.

He ain't slow no more.

He did. Jealous?

He is determined to hold onto his lead.

He is hot on Gagné's heels!

He passed another one!

He won't be last

He's gaining on the pack.

He's getting killed out there.

He's ready to make a dash

He's still going.

Head in the game. Head in the game.

Heads up! Shell crusher, two o' clock!

Heard that before.

Heard what? I didn't hear anything.

Heck, no!

Hello, Angela. Let's get cooking.

Hello!

Help!

Help! Let me out. Let me out!

Help! The world is moving!

Here one second, gone the next.

Here we go.

Here we go.

Here you go, little snail. Now you've got the best seat in the house.

Here you go, Paz. Nice and warm.

Here, I made up your bed.

Hey, Angela. We did it!

Hey, Angelo! We got customers.

Hey, come here. Let's cut to the chase, okay?

Hey, don't go crazy on me.

Hey, everybody! My brother won the Indy 5,000!

Hey, Gagné! Why don't you pick on someone your own size?

Hey, hey, hey! Get out of here!

Hey, how'd you do that?

Hey, I think we got a crier here.

Hey, I'm not paying you guys to sit around and look pretty.

Hey, Juice Box, nice tricycle!

Hey, let go. Come on, man, let go!

Hey, little snail. Are you lost?

Hey, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Hey, snail! He's gradually gaining on you!

Hey, T.

Hey, tell everyone I'm bringing it.

Hey, there he goes again.

Hey!

Hey!

Hey! Don't test me, crow.

Hey! No touching!

Hey! Where are you going?

Hey.

Hey. hey, you a robot?

Hi, Chet.

His engine's roaring, he's flooring He won't run out of gas

Hit the brakes, people.

Home.

How could anyone not see the appeal of watching a bunch of cars,

How could they not make fun of you?

How did he do that?

How's it going, Sally?

Huh?

Hula.It's Tito.

I admit that there's been a wee bit of damage to inventory, here,

I almost forgot. I got you something.

I am like the cheetah. I never give up.

I can see it already.

I can still see you.

I can tuck. I can tuck.

I can't believe you're doing this.

I can't get out.

I can't help it.

I can't see him. I can't see him.

I can't tuck. I can't tuck!

I can't watch this.

I can't.

I daresay we've had a breakthrough, here.

I did it! I tucked! I tucked!

I don't believe it! Turbo just went under a car!

I don't get it.

I don't get it. That poster was awesome.

I don't know how to...

I don't know what crazy lab you escaped from

I don't know. All I know is, the other night,

I give you the next Indy 500 champion!

I got a beverage for you. And a beverage for you.

I got a shot here, Chet. I can do this. You'll see.

I got it! pasty!

I got it. We can have our very own telenovela!

I got this one! Oh, I got this one!

I gotta get out of here.

I gotta hand it to you, Tito.

I have a driver that I'd like to enter into the race.

I have a life?

I have to admit,

I know, but this little guy is something special.

I know, I know! isn't it great?

I know!

I love a man in uniform. For real!

I love it. Is it weird that I love it?

I love you, Guy!

I mean, come on, he's not even looking this way.

I mean, look at you.

I mean, yet.

I meant what I said.

I pictured it cleaner.

I promise that this will never, ever...

I step on you! Do you like that?

I think he could be our little shooting star.

I think I'm gonna be sick.

I thought I could get there.

I to the N to the Dizzy to the Wizzah. You dig?

I wanna enter him in the Indy 500.

I was kind of hoping the taco volution would've started by now.

I will not lose to a snail!

I will not stand by and watch the only brother I've got

I wish I could rename myself.

I wish I was tiny, so I can give you a hug.

I wish I was...

I wish...

I, like this passionate gentleman here, came from humble beginnings.

I'd just like to say...

I'd say an appropriate welcome, given the situation.

I'll be fine.

I'm detecting a refreshing note of disapproval.

I'm fast, like a shadow!

I'm going to hand things over to Chet, now,

I'm gonna call you boo.

I'm happy to poli see you all here today.

I'm here with five time Indy champ, the legendary Guy Gagné!

I'm just so happy.

I'm moving so fast, the whole world's going in slow motion, baby.

I'm okay.

I'm on it, Carl.

I'm out of here! Bye!

I'm really sorry.

I'm sitting on a crow, for crying out loud!

I'm sorry, Little Amigo. it's over.

I'm sorry, Theo.

I'm standing above the 101, and all of a sudden...

I'm talking commercials, talk shows, county fairs.

I'm telling you, Angelo,

I'm telling you, this snail crawled into our lives for a reason.

I'm Whiplash. And this here is my crew.

I'm worried. And you should be, too.

I've decided that I simply cannot permit a snail to enter...

I've decided...

I've never talked to a snail before. So small, so amusing.

If snails had to pay bills, that is.

If you think that's something, check this out.

If you'd just quit it with the speed stuff...

In all my years of racing, I've never seen a driver with this much raw talent.

In his debut here at the Motor Speedway.

In the high lane! At the stripe!

In the words of my dear father,

Indy. baby!

Instant replay. Again, in super slo mo.

Is it contagious?

Is it? Or is it that your unpaid bills are overdue?

Is that a snail?

Is that Chet?

Is this really necessary?

Is this your mother?

It doesn't make sense.

It is a lot of money.

It is amazing what you can do an your printer at home.

It is in you. it's always been in you.

It reeks in here.

It says, Dos Bros Tacos.

It takes hours to come down after a big race like this.

It was a rhetorical question!

It'll be 32 giant, fire breathing cars!

It's a little concept that I came up with. When you combine the words...

It's a miracle of nature!

It's a photo finish!

It's a snail. There's not that much to do.

It's Big Red all over again.

It's complete gridlock down there.

It's Gardener Day.

It's good enough.

It's in me.

It's like a minefield out here.

It's like an earthquake!

It's like I always said, Little Amigo, you are amazing!

It's like wearing a hat made out of feet.

It's like you're almost forcing them.

It's okay, it's okay, Theo. Just hang in there.

It's simple. First one to the top of that shooting star

Jack tivate.

Join your crew?

Just imagine what the Indy 500 could do.

Just keep your eyes closed until I say so, okay?

Just me.

Just north of the 707 in Van Nays, California.

Just step away from the grass and get back to work.

Killing?

Kim Ly Nail Salon!

Kim Ly Nail Salon. Where we put the nail in snail.

Kind of slow ish.

Ladies and gentlemen, and snail,

Later!

Laugh it up, garden snail.

Le if I could choose anybody in the world to be my best friend it would be...

Left turn! Left turn! Left turn!

Left turn! What do I do here? Oh, no, wait a minute. Left turn!

Let go of me! I'm just an old lady!

Let him race!

Let him race!

Let him race!

Let him race! Let him race! Let him race!

Let him race! Let him race! Let him race!

Let me get my calendar so I can time you.

Let's do this!

Let's do this.

Let's do this.

Let's finish this.

Let's go, people! Pick it up!

Let's go.

Let's just say, eventually, they have to wake up.

Light her up, Turbo. Do your thing, baby.

Like I said, your skills have truly paid the bills.

Listen, garden snail, you clearly got the skills to pay the bills.

Little Amigo!

Look at her.

Look at him go!

Look at him go.

Look at this place.

Look out!

Look. He dead.

Looks like the party is over for the motoring mollusk.

Mama, you look good!

Man, wait until people see this!

Maybe I should just settle down, try the vegan thing.

Maybe you've heard of her?

Millions of people watch that race.

Mm hmm, dead meat.

Mom!

Mom.

Moving into fourth position... third... Now, second!

Mr. Lopez, haw do you feel about getting to compete in the Indy 500.7

Mr. Lopez, while I appreciate your enthusiasm, my decision is...

My ears are burning. I hope you're not talking about me.

My jaw is locking up.

My name is Turbo.

My point is, we got a chance to change our lives for the better.

Nature. Mother Nature.

Need to believe that one day, maybe they could achieve the impossible, too.

Next question.

Next stop is the Starlight Plaza.

Next to him is that feisty young upstart, Turbo.

Nice choice, young man.

Nice curves.

Nice moves back there, boo.

Night, Steve! I don't know your name.

No dream is too big, and no dreamer

No dream is too big, and no dreamer, too small.

No dream is too big.

No twitching. Voila'!

No way.

No wonder they want to see you race, eh?

No, honey, soonest available three months from now, 6:00 AM.

No, I won't.

No, I'm not kidding! Tuck and roll!

No, it's not.

No, man. But it's fun.

No, no, no, Tito, that doesn't sound crazy.

No, no, no!

No, no, no!

No, no, no! Come on! Faster!

No, no, no. Theo, what are you doing? Don't give up.

No, no!

No, you didn't!

No, you got the wrong number. Yeah, okay.

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No! He keeps running as long as his legs will carry him.

No! Little snail!

No! No! No! No! No!

No! You're a taco genius, Angelo.

No.

No. It is not in you.

No. That would be ridiculous.

Not dead! Not dead!

Not every dream is meant to come true.

Not racing snails.

Not this time.

Not this time. Come on!

Nothing out of order, did you, Theo?

Nothing wrong with you? Well, you're...

Now check this. Right about now,

Now get out there. Snail up, baby!

Now, come on.

Now, de lax those vibes!

Now, I did not just face every fear known to snail kind

Now, I know some people may say $20,000 sounds like a lot of money.

Now, I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear what I clearly just heard.

Now, I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear what I clearly just heard.

Now, in case you're still not convinced...

Now, it might get a little chilly tonight.

Now, now. Order.

Now, that's more like it.

Now, that's more like it.

Now, this is how it's done. Air jack.

Of course I do.

Of course I do.

Oh, man.

Oh, my gosh. That's me, that's me.

Oh, no!

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no. I've got tetanus. I've got tetanus.

Oh, no. Nope. This isn't happening.

Oh, Theo. Be careful out there.

Oh, yes, you can.

Oh, yes. We're going to Indianapolis, Chet!

Oh.

Oh. yeah!

Okay, baby, here we go.

Okay, enough with the crazy talk, Theo.

Okay, everybody. Back on the bus.

Okay, I'm gonna wake up any minute now.

Okay, let me know if you need anything.

Okay, listen up. Let's have a nice, safe race out there today.

Okay, okay, I'm going! Good luck out there, Turbo!

Okay, that was...

Okay, time to go. You ready?

Okay, wait.

Okay, what's happening to me?

Okay.

Okay. I would like to begin with some very exciting news.

Okay. So, what's your plan?

Okay. you ready?

On three. One, two...

On your mark.

On your mark...

One breakfast burrito, please.

One second, please.

One second, please.

Only moments until the green flag drops, and history is made here at Indianapolis.

Only this time, instead of one lawn mower,

Otherwise, we'd be able to pay the bills. Remember?

Oué pasa, my friend?

Oué pasa, my friend?

Out of nowhere, a dark horse is challenging Gagné.

Overripe!

Overripe!

Overripe!

Overripe!

Own it, brother.

Paid in full, son.

Pam!

Patience, bro. Taco volutions don't happen in a day.

Pedal to the metal, Turbo.

Planning a taco volution!

Please tell me those phony glasses are not your plan.

Please, say no. Please, say no.

Please, sir, give my snail a shot, and I swear, you won't regret it.

Prepare to be White Shadowed!

Push ahead!

Quiet, quiet!

Quinceañers, confirmations, graduations.

Quitting time!

Ready...

Really? To our faces?

Relaxing vibes.

Risk his life chasing some impossible dream.

Risk it all, Guy!

Run!

Running of the Indianapolis 500.

Safe.

Salt!

Santa Maria!

Say no more. it's your girlfriend.

Says who?

See you in the winner's circle, garden snail.

Set...

She's a cutie.

Shelby Stone, hot off her win in Sao Paulo.

Shut the door.

Simmer down, boo. I'm on duty, here.

Sir, if I may.

Skidmark. You bringing the beverages?

Sleep tight, Little Amigo. We got a big day tomorrow.

Sleep!

Sleep? Are you kidding me?

Slow down? Are you kidding? I'm never going slow again!

Smooth, smooth, smooth.

Snail is fast!

Snail power, baby!

Snail quicker than a lightning flash

Snail style, baby!

Snail up!

Snail up!

Snail up.

Snailed it.

Snails don't have money.

So close!

So, I warmed up your blanket.

So, I'm here to invite you to join our crew.

So, without further ado,

So, you are my little competition, eh?

So, you get out there and you win this...

So, you got a plan, Taco Man?

Son of a gun.

Sorry, Paz. Can you throw that up here?

Sorry, Tito, but I've got work to do.

Sorry! So sorry. We'll have this under control...

Sorry. High beams. Sorry.

Sorry. My bad.

Sponsored by Adrenalade!

Starlight Plaza! Hey!

Start living your life.

Start your engines!

Stay here. I'll be right back.

Stay herein this rundown strip mall?

Stood up for you, apologized for you, and this is what I get in return.

Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!

Stop! stop, stop!

Suited and booted, gooted and looted, dipped and whipped!

Sure beats the view from the garden, huh?

Sure, knock yourself out.

Sure. It never stopped any of you.

Sweet dreams, Little Amigo. I'll see you in the morning.

Ta da!

Taco and revolution. I get it.

Taco Man and his sidekick, the Churro.

Taco Man cried in front of millions of people.

Taco Man found dead snail.

Take a chance and risk it all, or play it safe and suffer defeat.

Take a look at this place.

Talk to your brother, Chet. Or I will.

Televised in aver 200 countries and aired in 3.7 different languages,

Tell us, Guy, do you have any advice for the future racers out there

Tell us, Guy, what inspired you to became a race driver?

Thank you very much, Carl. Good afternoon, everyone.

Thank you, plucky snail.

Thank you. Come back soon.

That being said,

That guy is as crazy as you are.

That one thing is...

That rubber peeling off the tires can be a minefield for these drivers.

That snail is fast That snail is fast

That snail is fast, fast, fast Fast, fast, fast, fast

That snail is fast.

That tastes awesome.

That was close.

That was off the hook crazy!

That's a bad thing.

That's a new one.

That's all any driver can do. Next question.

That's for sure.

That's Gagné's best time yet.

That's it. I'm sorry, honey. Today is the day.

That's it. This pit crew is officially under new management.

That's lunch!

That's my brother, right there. That's the back of his head!

That's nice.

That's our snail!

That's peculiar.

That's the best thing about you.

That's what I'm talking about!

That's what I'm talking about!

That's what I'm talking about!

The babies were cute. The adults were just so mean.

The customers are gonna be lining up around the block.

The dreamers out there, they need them.

The happier you'll be.

The Indy 500? What are you talking about?

The Indy 500.

The joys of racing.

The latest figures are in.

The name is Smoove Move. I set the tone around here, you dig?

The pace car is off and the parade laps are underway.

The snail's not going away, Guy.

The stove talks, bro.

The track is hacked up all the way down the front straight.

The underdog versus the champion.

The world loves the underdogs, you know.

Then I better make the most of today.

Then it shouldn't put a limit on spirit!

Then stop driving like one!

Then you better put your money where your mouth is.

Then you'd have to be crazy not to grab onto that shell,

Theo, a snail cannot race in a competition meant for cars.

Theo, stop.

Theo, tuck and roll!

Theo, what are you doing?

Theo, what happens if you wake up tomorrow, and your powers are gone?

Theo, what were you thinking?

Theo!