A Sonny Chiba triple feature.
A Vietnam movie?
Actually, I don't like The Partridge Family.
Ain't she the sweetest goddamn thing you ever saw in your whole life?
Alabama is moving on to some greener pastures.
Alabama, where's our coke? And where's Clarence?
ALABAMA: all of your money problems are gonna be over.
ALABAMA: Amid the chaos of that day...
ALABAMA: Can I peek?
ALABAMA: Have you gotten your mail yet? Well, no, my roommate Floyd...
ALABAMA: Hello?
ALABAMA: Hello? Hi.
ALABAMA: Hi, I'm Alabama. DICK: Clarence, you look good!
ALABAMA: Hi. FLOYD: Yes.
ALABAMA: I should.
ALABAMA: Is he supposed to be a good guy?
ALABAMA: It's a helicopter.
ALABAMA: Oh, God!
ALABAMA: Oh, wow!
ALABAMA: Sure, why not?
ALABAMA: Sweetie!
ALABAMA: Sweetie!
ALABAMA: The bottom of the ninth, Mr. Worley.
ALABAMA: The Oriental?
ALABAMA: Uh uh.
ALABAMA: Whoo! Woo!
ALABAMA: Yeah, just a little bit, I'm not much of a wine gal.
ALABAMA: You have got popcorn all over you.
All I got is fucking Floyd.
All right, all right. It's all right. Elliot knows me.
All right, he's kind of paranoid, I didn't tell you nothing.
All right, I am turning the lights on. Okay, open them.
All right, I'm Marty.
All right, peep this.
All right, so what did you tell him?
All right, this is my friend Dick Richie's number and address...
All right! Here we go!
All right?
All right? I mean, I'm not putting him down, here.
All right? If I had time for a courtship, Lee, I would.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right. No more Mr. Fucking Nice Guy.
All those assholes make are unwatchable movies from unreadable books.
All you're going to find is this right here.
Almost four years.
Along with his pimping and other affairs...
Always have, always will.
Always have.
Always will.
Am I correct?
Am I lying?
And a million bucks! Small bills! And fast!
And all day long I'm seeing and hearing people doing exactly...
And all it says is, Dear Clarence, because I couldn't write any more.
And besides, Floyd smoked the second page of the letter. Okay?
And by the way, I ain't gonna be alone. I'm bringing my lovely wife.
And Clarence, he can do whatever he wants with it.
And Coming Home in a Body Bag, that was a fucking movie.
And guys you don't know. And more importantly, they don't know you.
And he knows it.
And he snagged this coke, but he's a good cop with a wife and a kid.
And he wants a sample bag.
And he'd say:
And he'll talk to you. If after talking to you he likes you...
And hop onto that waterbed. And watch X rated movies...
And I can't believe I didn't look under the fucking bed.
And I don't want anybody else.
And I feel really goofy saying this...
And I know where you live.
And I need you and your abilities to distribute it.
And I never thought to ask.
And I really wish somebody would just come to my rescue and everything will be all right.
And I think you make a real cute couple.
And I would make a million dollar bet that Alabama is at the same address.
And if you don't believe me, you can look it up.
And it won't ever get that good again.
And just tell him what's what. And if he tells you...
And later on in the story, he gets in this fight with this Nazi bastard.
And maybe one day, when I start being a successful actor...
And on that TV over there, since you've been in the room...
And once you leave town, I wouldn't even worry about it.
And she had a half ****** kid. Now...
And sometimes Clarence asks me what would I have done if he had died.
And that envelope right there, it's some pay off money.
And that things would be much like they are now.
And that's the last I saw of him...
And the Kraut, he grabs hold of the chain.
And then you go, and you keep driving and you keep driving.
And to do that, we've gotta show in court, beyond any reasonable doubt...
And we know something is rotten in Denmark, because this guy...
And when it comes to relationships...
And when's he coming back?
And you got access to all kinds of money and shit like that.
And you guys just settle this by yourselves.
And you're not going to fucking believe what he's got to say.
And you've already given up your shit.
And your great, great, great...
And, Floyd, why don't you get out of my beer and get a fucking job?
And, Lee, you're no idiot.
Answer me!
Anything else?
Anything happens, we'll be there like fucking gangbusters, okay?
Apparently, I'm not as dumb as you fucking think I am, am I?
Are you speaking of my beautiful, charming, sexy wife, Mrs. Alabama Worley?
As if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response.
As long as you're not at the scene of the crime...
As the sun sets slowly in the west we bid you a fine farewell.
Ask me that one a little bit later.
At the Beverly Ambassador.
Babalu, you were perfect.
Baby!
Bama, I gotta ask you a question. Who and what is a Drexl?
Bama, you really got that playing basketball?
Bama.
Basically, Clarence, guys I don't know.
Because I'm your son.
Because you could have been a real dick.
Because you looked like a nice guy.
Because you...
Being that's what you have.
Boris, be nice. Make everybody some coffee. Okay?
Boris, get me another cup of coffee, will you?
Boris, get me another cup of coffee, will you?
Boris, please. I'm meeting people right now, okay?
Boris, shut the fuck up! We're all going to die here, these are cops.
Boris, we got all kinds of sandwich shit back there...
BORIS: I need an ambulance!
BORIS: Lee. What?
BORIS: So, they're cops. Who gives a shit!
BORIS: We could kill all of you and you fucking know it.
Both of you put the fucking guns on the floor now!
Bring the whole fucking cast, all right?
But don't expect me and my friends to hang around forever...
But every once in a while it goes the other way too.
But he works as an assistant to a very big movie producer named Lee Donowitz.
But I always do.
But I know exactly where your white ass is coming from.
But I think I love you.
But I'm fairly confident you're just here to do business, so look.
But I'm not in that position.
But if I did eat some pussy...
But knowing you and me, we can jump on any one of those planes out there...
But slow it down, man.
But the boss, he's a pretty nice guy. He lets you borrow money...
But the dream was real...
But what I have to offer you, that's as good as it's gonna get.
But what makes you think that I would do that?
But you're telling me everything.
But you're the last person in the world that I expected to see this morning.
But your son, fuckhead that he is...
But, until that day, I ain't got nothing. All right?
But, well...
By the way, have you seen your lovely little wife today?
Bye, Daddy!
Bye, Daddy. Hope to see you again soon.
Bye,bye.
Call girls have pimps.
Can't breathe?
Cancun, why Cancun?
Cancun.
Choose a fucking lane!
Clarence and Alabama Go To Cancun. Don't you think?
Clarence says we got to go.
Clarence Worley?
Clarence, do you have any idea how difficult that is going to be?
Clarence, he didn't do anything, what the fuck are you ?
Clarence, it's great to hear from you, what's going on?
Clarence, what the fuck did you bring that for?
Clarence, you are without a doubt
Clarence, you are, without a doubt, the dumbest motherfucker...
CLARENCE: all of his money problems are gonna be over.
CLARENCE: Anything stronger?
CLARENCE: Dick, this is Alabama. Alabama, this is Dick.
CLARENCE: Did I ever tell you how much I hate airports?
CLARENCE: Elliot wasn't supposed to tell you anything.
CLARENCE: Hang on a second.
CLARENCE: Holy shit, look at this. Do you believe this?
CLARENCE: How long have you been living here?
CLARENCE: I can't see.
CLARENCE: I just want to make sure we got everything. Here I go.
CLARENCE: I mean, in that movie he couldn't give a fuck about nothing...
CLARENCE: I said get on your fucking knees! DICK: Clarence, what the fuck?
CLARENCE: I was only playing around, I just had to be sure.
CLARENCE: Is that what these are? Dailies?
CLARENCE: It'll get you high. What?
CLARENCE: Just great stories, great characters, beautiful artwork.
CLARENCE: Me too, Boris.
CLARENCE: Mr. Donowitz?
CLARENCE: Tell him as of tomorrow ALABAMA: As of tomorrow
CLARENCE: Thanks. Thanks a lot.
CLARENCE: Top of the morning to you, Mrs. Worley.
CLARENCE: Uh, tomorrow.
CLARENCE: Well, Lee, it's like this.
CLARENCE: What's this one called, anyway?
CLARENCE: Yeah, that is a great issue.
CLARENCE: Yeah, the one in black.
CLARENCE: You had a pimp?
CLARENCE: You know, Lee, most of these movies that win a lot of Oscars...
Clarence.
Clarence. He's sick, man.
Clarence...
Clarence's purple Cadillac, parked in front of your trailer yesterday.
Clean clothes.
CLIFFORD: Clarence...
CLIFFORD: I can, but I don't.
CLIFFORD: Your ancestors are ******s.
Coca leaves.
Cody, on three.
Cody!
Come again?
Come back with something that tells me where that asshole went.
Come here! I look fucking ridiculous! Get up! Laugh it up!
Come on, Alabama. We're taking off. Kiss Pops goodbye.
Come on, Clarence. Don't insult me, just call me Lee.
Come on, come on! Come on!
Come on, Dick.
Come on, eat something, you'll feel better.
Come on, everybody, don't be shy. Come on in. Come on in.
Come on, I'm starving. Let's go get something to eat. Who's this?
Come on, laugh it up!
Come on, please just write it down.
Come on, Rommel. Come on, boy, come on, come on.
Come on, what the fuck is waiting for us up there, huh?
Come on.
Come on.
Come on. Come on, I'll give you one shot because I like you.
Coming Home in a Body Bag is my favorite movie of all time.
Convince him.
Could I have one of those Chesterfields now?
Could you just find out if they know anything about us?
Dick is my He's my friend. He's in my acting class.
Dick Richie! Dick Richie!
Dick, if you were just a fucking actor, you never would have got in the room.
DICK: Did you tell him I was an actor?
DICK: Floyd.
DICK: I'm out, Floyd, I'm out. Are you here? No, he's not here.
DICK: Nice to meet you!
DICK: Quit playing around.
DICK: This is Floyd. CLARENCE: Floyd, all right.
DICK: What did he say?
DICK: You all right? You all right?
DICK: You can't help me out every now and then?
DICK: You've got a hell of a lot of cocaine here, man.
Did you put it under the bed?
DIMES: All right, let's be nice, guys, come on.
DIMES: Just talk regular, Elliot. ELLIOT: I'm sorry.
DIMES: Of course you'll only want to fuck her in the ass...
DIMES: You're going to be okay.
Dirty cops, well, we got to get Internal Affairs on this.
Do you have a fella?
Do you know what time it is?
Do you know who I am, Mr. Worley?
Do you like to get pie after you see a good movie?
Do you love him?
Do you realize how much fucking coke you have here?
Do you want a bite of my pie?
DON: What you motherfuckers talking about?
Don't condescend me, man. I'll fucking kill you, man.
Don't fucking move!
Don't worry about nothing, all right? It's all going to work out for us.
Don't worry, Daddy. I'm going to keep this fellow on a short leash.
Don't worry, I'll desire.
Don't you die on me.
Don't you know that my films have grossed more than 2.8 billion, Clarence?
Don't you want to count your money?
Don't you? Huh? Oh, yeah.
Dr. Zhivago is a pretty big movie, you know.
Drexl had an association with a fellow named Blue Lou Boyle.
Drexl, any ****** says he don't eat pussy's lying his ass off.
DREXL: Shit, man, you done fucked up again.
Drexl? What's a Drexl?
Drug related? Why drug related?
E99!E99!E99!
Easy,easy,easy.
Elliot Blitzer.
Elliot looks a little green.
Elliot tells me that you're fronting for a dirty cop.
Elliot what?
Elliot, chill out, chill out.
Elliot, do I look like a beautiful blond with big tits and an ass...
Elliot, don't call me here anymore, especially not on Sunday, all right?
Elliot, here. Call Joe...
Elliot, I love this kid. Monty, get the money.
Elliot, I swear to God, somebody is stealing from me.
Elliot, it's Sunday. Can you tell me why I'm talking to you on Sunday?
Elliot, look at me. Look at me. You comfortable?
Elliot, stop fucking around.
Elliot, we've done this a thousand times.
Elliot, your motivation is to stay out ofjail.
Elliot.
Elliot. He wants to talk to you.
Elvis looked good.
Elvis' voice, kung fu, pie.
Enough about the King. How about you?
Especially things about history.
Everybody, this is Monty.
Everybody's here. Elliot. Who's who?
Exactly roommates.
Exactly. If I'm with you, then I'm with you.
Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son...
Except rocking and rolling, living fast, dying young...
Excuse me.
Excuse me. Do you think you could turn down the heat just a teeny bit?
Fat cats, big shots. Guys who can afford $200,000.
Fear and desire, huh, Clarence?
First one is tough. No fucking fooling.
Fix this fucked up family for good.
Floyd say he don't be eating pussy.
Floyd, can't you answer the door, at least, for me?
FLOYD: Hey, get some beer...
FLOYD: Oh, man, I didn't even hear it.
FLOYD: Sure. Clarence Worley from Detroit?
FLOYD: That's cool, way to go!
For a captive audience.
For the very first time in my life. Know what that's like?
Forget it, don't worry about it. No problem, I'm gone, all right?
Frankie, tell Luca to go outside and do you know what.
From growing up with him, I learned the pantomime.
Fuck me...
FUCK you!
FUCK you!
FUCK you!
FUCK you!
Fuck you! All you pigs, put your guns on the floor and back away!
Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!
Fuck you! I want a car. Take me to the airport! And I want it full of gas!
Fuck you! I'll blow this bitch's brains to kingdom come!
Fuck you! You piece of shit!
Fuck you.
Fuck! Fuck!
Fuck! Fuck! Come on. Fuck.
Fuck! Motherfucker! Bama, we gotta go! Jesus Christ!
Fucking A. Great fucking movie.
Fucks you all up. You get the pain shooting through your brain...
Gangster, drug dealer. Somebody who you don't want on your ass.
Get a Get a six pack of something imported.
Get a bag and put Alabama's things in it!
Get ahold of yourself, you fucking sissy!
Get down on the floor!
Get on your feet, sweetie. You ain't hurt that bad.
Get out of my face, motherfucker!
Get ready to be happy.
Get the fuck out of here. Clarence, you got married?
Getting away with it every day.
Give it to her.
Give me a coffee, will you?
Give the man a prize! All right, now, about a year and a half ago...
Go look in your house. There's a note on your TV.
Go on in there. Come on.
Go to this comedian's son's apartment.
Go! Come on!
Good morning, Daddy.
Good point, detective. Right? Fucking faggot!
Guys who can use a whole fucking suitcase full of cocaine.
Hang in there, Elliot, goddamn it!
Hard to tell you what to get, because different places have different things.
Have a seat, boy.
Have you seen your son?
He asked for some quick cash...
He did that movie, Coming Home in a Bodybag.
He said that if I didn't get you on the phone, that he would leave...
He shows up yesterday...
He thinks he is. He said his mama was an Apache, but I suspect he's lying.
He wanted me to act like I just showed up.
He wants to talk to you.
He was my Pimp
He'd been sitting on the shit for a year and a half.
He's a friend of Dick's, remember?
He's a wild man, this kid, Clarence. I like him.
He's bluffing you, Elliot. He's bluffing you, can't you see that?
He's going to be everybody's best friend.
He's going to shoot him.
He's got a couple of guys, he's been dealing with them for years.
He's just at practice.
He's not a dirty cop, he's a good cop. He just, you know...
He's not going to search you, you didn't do anything. Now just put it in your bra!
He's not going to shoot him.
He's traveling with a real pretty girl named Alabama?
He's your friend? You got problems.
Hello, hello, hello.
Hello, Lee, it's Clarence. At last, we speak.
Hello? Hello?
Hello? What money problems?
Here comes the train.
Here we are.
Here we go.
Here you go, Mad Dog.
Here's a fact, I don't know whether you know or not.
Hey, Clarence!
Hey, come here! Rommel! Rommel!
Hey, Floyd. Watch yourself. Be careful.
Hey, hey! What kind of daughterly smackeroo is that?
Hey, hey. I didn't tell you guys yet?
Hey, I ain't no fag. But Elvis was prettier than most women.
Hey, Lee, something I never told you about me. I hate fucking cops!
Hey, listen, we found him. We just want the fucking collar.
Hey, look, dickhead. It's your bad luck that we caught you speeding...
Hey, Marty! What the fuck are you doing?
Hey, Rommel. Long time no see, huh?
Hey, Roxanne!
Hey, you got caught.
Hey, you guys. This is what's going to happen.
Hey, you want to watch some TV or something? They might be back here.
Hey!
Hey!
Hey! Rommel!
Hey.
Hey. Hi, Catherine, I was just walking out
Hi, how you doing, Alabama Worley?
Hi!
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi. Clarence told me all about you. He said you were his best friend.
Hi. Come on in. Lee's in the can, he'll be out in a quick.
Hightailed it out of there. Would have got away with it.
Hold on a second. Big D., you saying you eat pussy?
Holy Mary, mother of God. This shit can't be real.
Holy shit.
Honey, hold this.
Honey, it's too early in the morning. It's only 9:00.
Honey, sit down. Relax, relax.
Honey, you have blood in your eye. Come on.
Honey, you're alive!
How about me what?
How about me what?
How about you go to the movies with me tonight?
How do you know that? I mean, have you been over there?
How do you really think I'm doing with Lee?
How does Dick know this guy?
Huh?
Huh? Is that what you want?
Hundreds and hundreds of years ago, you see...
Hurry back now.
I ain't looking at the movie because I already seen it seven years ago.
I bet you green money that first little black dot he took a bead on...
I bullshitted him.
I buy their little movies and I accomplish what I want to accomplish...
I can imagine how painful this must be for you. But Clarence...
I can take that, and I can sell it a little bit at a time...
I can't be sure of how much he told you. In the chance you're in the dark...
I can't believe it. You put it under the fucking bed.
I can't believe what you're telling me.
I can't believe you put it under the fucking bed.
I can't take this, I'm sorry, but I just can't!
I can't tell you how relieved I was, when you took off your dress...
I certainly hope so.
I didn't just happen to be at that theater. I was paid to be there.
I didn't look under the fucking bed.
I do want to kill him, but I don't want to spend...
I don't believe this. Elliot, why the hell are you talking to me...
I don't believe you.
I don't blame you.
I don't fucking believe it.
I don't give a shit as long as me and Todd, we get credit for the bust.
I don't give a shit if you're fucking Wyatt Earp or Jack the Ripper.
I don't give a shit who you bring in, captain.
I don't have a pot to piss in, or a window to throw it out.
I don't know about you, but they give me the creeps.
I don't know, but it's a fucking lot!
I don't know, Clarence.
I don't know, Clarence.
I don't know, he just appeared like magic.
I don't know, he just appeared like magic.
I don't know, what the hell do you want me to say?
I don't see enough of you all week, I gotta talk to you on Sunday, too?
I don't think so.
I don't think they know shit. But I don't want to think, I want to know for sure.
I don't want to be a wise guy or nothing.
I don't want to be late.
I eat every motherfucking thing.
I felt like helping him.
I find that shit fascinating.
I give up. Who are you?
I got a 7:00 call.
I got a select few distributors I deal with.
I got some money I could give you.
I got this in Las Vegas, Nevada.
I grow it on my windowsill. See, the light is really good up there.
I guess the big question is, do you have a fella?
I guess the same thing that compelled you guys...
I had this really, really good audition for T.J. Hooker the other day.
I have a son of my own, about your boy's age.
I have something I got to tell you.
I have to hand it to you, Clarence, this is not nose garbage.
I haven't been exactly doing a lot of entertaining...
I haven't heard from you in three years.
I hear you were once a cop, so I can assume you have heard of us before.
I heard that.
I implore you not to go down that road with them.
I just did you the biggest fucking favor of your life!
I just gotta tell you, I really am a big fan.
I just want to be able to announce this deal at Cannes.
I just... I really need your help.
I kept asking Clarence why our world seemed to be collapsing...
I killed him.
I knew it was you!
I know that, Richard, but one thing this last week has taught me...
I know you know where they are. So tell me...
I like her.
I like you, Clarence.
I love this guy, he bullshitted him, you believe this kid? I love him.
I love this guy.
I love you.
I love you. There is a God.
I mean, after Apocalypse Now, I think it's the best Vietnam movie ever made.
I mean, at the price he's paying...
I mean, Christ, he is not worth one of your tears.
I mean, he gets paid by people to fuck guys up. You know.
I mean, he is rockabilly.
I mean, he really was, this rabbit will do anything not to do any time.
I mean, I didn't know what was bullshit and what wasn't.
I mean, I never had as much fun with a girl as I had with you, my whole life.
I mean, if you want some, it will be here. All right?
I mean, if you want to say no, then fine.
I mean, she a four alarm fire, or what?
I mean, we're talking a lot of film, here.
I mean, you are so much like your mother, I can't believe it.
I mean, you are used to dealing with professionals...
I mean, you can do that. Right?
I mean, you just said you loved me.
I mean, your guy is interested because with that much shit at his fingertips...
I need an ambulance!
I need an ambulance!
I need to do this.
I need to get a quick signature, it would be great.
I need you to write down your former address.
I read a lot.
I really wish somebody would just come and take me away! Just take me away!
I said to come out from behind the couch. Okay? Capisce?
I said to come out from behind the couch. Okay? Capisce?
I said, come out from behind the couch, you fucking guinea. Now!
I said, do I look like a beautiful blond with big tits and an ass...
I said, do you fucking love him? Huh?
I said, open your fucking eyes!
I suppose you've got to get up early, huh?
I tell him of how I would want to die.
I think I'll keep lover boy here entertained.
I think you're too scared to be eating.
I threw up on the first one, you believe that?
I treated you like a son! You fucking stabbed me in the heart!
I want to hear all about it, okay? Come on.
I want to hear you say it, I want to hear you say:
I want you to know that I am not damaged goods.
I want you to know that you can count on me to protect you.
I want you to know that...
I was a call girl.
I was just trying to lend a girl a helping hand.
I was selfish. I know I was selfish. I was, but...
I watch that hillbilly and I want to be him so bad.
I wish somebody would just come and get me because I don't like this anymore!
I wouldn't go so far as to say that. He treated me pretty decent.
I'd be ashamed as a motherfucker, man.
I'd like to see Dr. Zhivago.
I'd take you out, I'd hold your hand, I'd kiss your cheek at the door.
I'll fucking have you killed!
I'll get the check. Where to next?
I'll send you a postcard from Hollywood, all right?
I'll tell you something, Clarence. When veterans in that bullshit war...
I'll tell you. Okay? But you have to promise me you'll keep it quiet.
I'm 100 percent monogamous.
I'm a married man, buddy.
I'm a movie producer, you know?
I'm a really good person.
I'm driving. Okay.
I'm friends with Elliot.
I'm getting angry asking the same question a second time.
I'm getting fucking old.
I'm glad. Hopefully that will clear up the how full of shit am I?...
I'm going to ask you a fucking question. And you give me the right fucking answer!
I'm going to go grab us something to eat.
I'm going to go jump in the tub and get all wet, and slippery, and soapy.
I'm going to talk to you tomorrow. All right.
I'm her husband.
I'm his father.
I'm in big fucking trouble.
I'm losing a fucking fortune over here.
I'm not a drug dealer. I'm not saying that you're a drug dealer...
I'm not a theater checker. I'm a call girl.
I'm not eating because I'm not hungry.
I'm not lying to you. And I swear from this moment forth...
I'm not saying nothing. I'm just saying what I'd do.
I'm not scared of you, I just don't like you.
I'm not sitting because I'm not staying.
I'm not wearing one.
I'm not what they call in Florida white trash!
I'm on this earth to make good movies, nothing more...
I'm Sicilian.
I'm so proud of you. Did I do my part okay?
I'm sorry if I seem a little tense.
I'm sorry, all right?
I'm sorry, I think you have the wrong room.
I'm sorry, man. I didn't mean to scare you.
I'm sorry. Fuck.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Friends?
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sure you've got better things to do with your time...
I'm talking about a massacre. They snatched my narcotics.
I'm telling you, he'd roll over on his Mommy, his Daddy...
I'm telling you, it's going to be fine. I'll be in and out of there.
I'm up high enough off the street so, you know, you can't see it. It works perfectly.
I'm very impressed. You're a very fine actor.
I'm with that party that you wanted me to get together with, Lee.
I've always wanted to see what TV in other countries looks like.
I've been a call girl for exactly four days, and you are my third customer.
I've been in America all my life.
I've got more taste in my penis.
I've heard of Blue Lou Boyle.
I've never had a hamburger taste this good.
I've seen him.
If anything out of the ordinary goes down, I swear to God...
If Dick hadn't ensured me you're good people...
If he doesn't matter, which he doesn't...
If he doesn't, he'll say fuck you, and he'll walk out of the room.
If he don't bite, we haven't got shit, except possession.
If I ever did eat some pussy I would never eat any pussy, right?
If that bullet had been two inches more to the left.
If they pat you down, they're not going to search your balls.
If you do you're fucking stupid. You know that?
If you gave me a million years to ponder...
If you want me to help you sell a little bit at a time, that's all I can do.
If you want my movie, Lee, you're going to have to come to terms...
If you want, I'll take my gun, and I'll lay it on the table. It's up to you.
If you were paid to be there, what are you? A theater checker?
In a theater full of empty seats, why did you sit by me?
In Jailhouse Rock, he was everything rockabilly is about.
In my movie, darling, you get top billing.
In that movie, he couldn't give a fuck about nothing.
In that whole fucking time you were a drunk, did I ever get mad...
In this scene, you're both in a oar, and Bill Shatner's hanging on the hood.
Is he any good? Is he talented, or...? Really?
Is he big league?
Is he nice?
Is that it? Huh? Is that what you want? I mean do you love him?
Is this a joke?
Isn't that cool?
It ain't white boy day, is it?
It looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.
It sounds almost like a ****** name.
It was the only movie at the time that won a lot of Oscars with balls...
It was. You know, I knew something must be rotten in Denmark.
It's a big game, now, Elliot.
It's a fact. Yeah. You see...
It's a sequel to Body Bag.
It's about 12.
It's about Alabama.
It's all fun and fucking games, until you get caught, but now we got you.
It's all right.
It's difficult because you're selling to a particular group...
It's got a nice ring to it. Sounds like a movie.
It's gotta be the whole enchilada in one shot and that's the way it's got to be.
It's his money, let him do whatever the hell he wants.
It's just after I see a movie, I like to go get a piece of pie...
It's just that being a distributor is not what I'm all about.
It's nice to meet people with common interests, ain't it?
It's not any kind of fun.
It's true. You like Elvis. You like Janis...
It's written, it's a fact. It's written.
Jesus.
Journey's end, baby. Snow at the end of the rainbow.
Just let me hear who it is.
Just shut up and stay the fuck put, Elliot!
Killing is the hard part. Getting away with it, that's easy.
Krinkle, this is it, and it's all ours. I mean, talk about falling into something...
Lance.
Lee Donowitz could afford...
Lee is not into taking risks, okay?
Lee, I'm not satisfied until the spoon stands straight up.
Lee, my uncle Roger and my uncle Jerry, both of whom were in Nam...
Lee, that's all practically uncut. If you so desire...
Lee, that's all practically uncut. If you so desire...
Lee, we are talking Dr. Zhivago, here.
Lee, when you see this, you're going to shit, I'm telling you.
LEE: I better. Bingo.
LEE: Ooh. That's imaginative.
LEE: You like them? CLARENCE: Yeah, they're great.
LEE: You're nuts!
Let me handle this, all right?
Let me see that.
Let me see those eyes.
Let me talk to Elliot.
Let's g0!
Like my dailies, there, Clar?
Like Nick Curry used to say, if I'm wrong, I swear to God, I'll fucking apologize, all right?
Listen to this. You'll get out in a few years, you'll meet some old lady.
Listen, Clarence, I'm not Joe Cocaine, okay?
Listen, do you mind filling me in on what I missed?
Listen. Every pimp in the world could get shot.
Look at this! Making fun of my motherfucking peeps?
Look here, Charlie.
Look what we got here.
Look, Bama, I know this scares the shit out of you...
Look, Carla... Kandi...
Look, Clarence, Lee Donowitz is not a pimp.
Look, he's haunting me, you know.
Look, I'd like to help you if I could, but I haven't seen Clarence.
Look, I'd like to help you if I could, but I haven't seen Clarence.
Look, I've been trying to keep this whole thing in perspective.
Look, this is the whole ball game, the fucking game, this is it!
Look, we don't know what's going to be coming next.
Look. I mean, goddamn, I've never asked you for a goddamn thing.
Look. See, it tries to pin down...
Love airports now.
Lover, why don't you be a sport and go get us some beer?
Mad Max, that's a movie...
Make sure they're not ripping the place off?
MAN [ON RADIO]: Morning, everybody. It's 6:22 here in L.A. I'm David Perry at KBLU.
MAN 1 [ON FILM]: Come on! Ready?
MAN 1 [ON FILM]: My heart beats and there is time.
MAN 1: An oxygen...
MAN 1: Put them down now!
MAN 1: You mean you're scared?
MAN 2: Come.
MAN 2: Don't move, Tojo.
MAN 2: Drop your guns and back away!
MAN 2: Hey, laundromat clothes!
MAN 2: Larry, where are we going?
Married man. You want to say hello to my better half?
Marty, take the car, go get her. Bring her dumb ass back here.
Marty, you know what we got here? A motherfucking Charlie Bronson.
MARTY: He was asking about Alabama.
MARTY: I can't find my jacket! DREXL: Go look in the fucking hamper.
MARTY: Roxanne, where's my jacket?
Max Julian, Carol Speed and Richard Pryor.
Maybe this fool is such a bad motherfucker...
Maybe you can help me, I'm looking for a friend of mine.
Meeting Captain Kirk, that would be cool.
MENTOR: Are you kidding, man? He loves you.
MENTOR: I gotta hand it to you, Clarence.
MENTOR: I said can you live with it? Live with what?
MENTOR: No, that's why it's not ass kissing.
MENTOR: Well, can you live with it? CLARENCE: What?
Mickey Rourke, a man who can appreciate the finer things in life, like sugar.
Moment of truth.
Monty! Monty! What are you, fucking nuts?
Morning.
Motherfucker, don't touch him! Motherfucker!
Motherfucker, don't touch him! Motherfucker!
Motherfucker!
Mr. Worley.
My father was the world heavyweight champion of Sicilian liars.
My friend I'm calling you my friend, I just met you.
My name is Elliot, and I'm with the Cub Scouts of America.
My name is Sadie.
My name is Vincent Coccotti. I work as counsel for Mr. Blue Lou Boyle.
My peace of mind is worth that much. Not one penny more.
Nice and slow!
Nice? Daddy, nice ain't the word. I mean, this girl, she's a peach.
Nicholson, what's the fucking difference? So, we go to work on the guy, right?
NICHOLSON: I'm going to get some coffee.
NICHOLSON: Motherfucker.
NICHOLSON: Put the fucking guns down.
NICHOLSON: Put your jacket on. Put your jacket on.
NICHOLSON: Shit. Oh, Joe...
No joke.
No, Drexl is dead, you see. It's Clarence's coke.
No, he's not here right now.
No, I don't think that's necessary.
No, I'm a call girl, and there's a difference, you know.
No, keep it. Keep it.
No, man, it ain't white boy day.
No, man, that's what I was trying to tell you before.
No, no, no. I'm not saying I'm not interested, Clarence.
No, no, not particularly, how come?
No, no, thank you. Thank you, though.
No, no.
No, not for me, no.
No, not you, just some idiot who Don't give me the finger!
No, tell me.
No, thanks.
No, that's all right, she can count it, I'm going to go to the bathroom.
No, they were here, and they said they were going to go there.
No, wait. I gotta talk.
No, you don't know me. Not when it comes to shit like this.
No,no,no. None of that little bit at a time shit.
No? Don't you fucking lie to me, you motherfucker!
No.
No.
No. He's not big league. Okay?
No. I hadn't.
No. It's okay. When you stand up, it'll be okay.
No. Okay, then why are you telling me all this bullshit, huh?
No. Until they hear something better...
No. Yeah, go down Beach
No. You still have friends on the force?
Nobody's but yours. Well, what's the rush here?
None of this bullshit is necessary. I don't got no hold over Alabama.
Not really my cup of tea.
Nothing, nothing. You're a girl after my own heart. That's all.
Now I do it just to watch their fucking expression change.
Now I got to tell you something else.
Now look, Clarence, the more I hear about this Drexl fucker...
Now look, I just need help, and you can fucking help me. All right?
Now put your gun down, you son of a bitch!
Now, don't get me wrong. I love you, I'm glad to see you.
Now, don't peek. Keep your eyes shut. All right?
Now, first of all, Lee, I want to tell you I'm a real big fan of yours.
Now, first of all, Lee, I want to tell you I'm a real big fan of yours.
Now, Floyd, you sure that's how you get to the Beverly Ambassador?
Now, how did he know you were gonna be at that theater?
Now, I can't get a million for it, but you can, all right?
Now, I know I'm pretty. But I ain't as pretty as a couple of titties.
Now, I'm basically a pretty resourceful guy. If I didn't really need it, I wouldn't ask.
Now, if I say I love you, and just throw caution to the wind...
Now, see, Elliot, that's the best place for it, okay?
Now, see...
Now, the first time you kill somebody, that's the hardest.
Now, there should be... There should be a 7UP in there.
Now, this...
Now, what compelled you to bring that along?
Now, what happened, what's going on, what are you talking about?
Now, where's my coke?
Now, where's our coke'? Where's Clarence?
Now, you don't want to go to jail, right? Do you want to go to jail?
Now, you got to remember something.
Now, you see what you get...
Now, you're going to have to excuse the place.
Now.
Now. The part you will be reading for is one of the bad guys.
Officer Dimes.
Officer Dimes. Officer Dimes.
Oh, baby, come on, Clarence. I just want to disappear from there.
Oh, baby, you're bleeding.
Oh, fuck, I should have my goddamn head examined for driving like this.
Oh, fuck!
Oh, Jesus, I am the clumsiest person in the world.
Oh, look what happened!
Oh, man, I like this Clarence kid, this fucking guy is crazy.
Oh, yeah, man, I know them. They've been by here.
Oh, yeah, we got this puppy. This was a good idea.
Oh, you got it all worked out.
Oh! Slipped in the other one there.
Oh! Slipped in the other one there.
Oh. Go down Beechwood...
Oh. Hi.
Okay
Okay
Okay
Okay, all right.
Okay, ask me again, one by one.
Okay, Clarence. Listen.
Okay, here it goes. You know the place you took me to last night?
Okay, just hold on for a second. Shut up for a second.
Okay, Mr. Elliot fucking actor, you just made the big time.
Okay, now, the cop's got this weirdo...
Okay, okay.
Okay, Wednesday at the hotel. Three o'clock.
Okay? So what you got to do is that you got to get him...
Okay. Hi. How are you?
Okay. So, I'm just going to leave.
Okay. We'll get him on the phone and we'll arrange a meeting...
Okay. You think they might see this, perhaps?
On their honeymoon.
One less thing I gotta fucking worry about.
One. Two. Three!
Ooh ee! This child be fierce.
Open your eyes.
Or a supporting actor.
Patrol car pulls a guy over for speeding, right? Suspect is covered with coke...
Perfect merchandise. The only trouble is...
Perhaps.
Persians.
Peter Breck has already been cast in the part of Brian.
Phil Specter. Girl group stuff like He's a Rebel.
Please shut up! I'm trying to come clean, okay?
Please, please, he's almost here! Just fucking put it in your pants!
Pretend it's that fine, centerfold bitch.
Probably not. Beer. You can drink beer, can't you?
Put them down motherfucker! Put them down!
Put them down!
Put those guns down, motherfuckers!
Put your fucking guns down! Put them down!
Put your guns down!
Put your jacket on. One sleeve at a time.
Qkay, Lee?
Quit fucking around.
RAUGHS]
RAUGHS]
Read the letter.
Really frustrating living next to an airport when you don't got shit.
Really?
Really.
Remember that guy in Texas? The guy up in that fucking tower, killed all them people?
Remember, Elliot, we're going to be right down the hall...
Repeating themselves like a broken record.
Riddle me this, Batman. I mean, if you're all...
Rommel, where are you? Come on, get in here. Get in here now.
Said you didn't get out much, and it was your birthday and all.
Saw Coming Horne in a Body Bag.
Say it, goddamn it, I want to hear you say it!
Say something.
See this, that guy up there? It's Sonny Chiba.
See, I used to live by one back in Dearborne, you know.
See, if I ask if you want some dinner...
See, that is probably the single best piece I've read on Elvis Presley...
See, you're getting the bargain of a lifetime because...
See?
Seems a cop from some department, we don't know which one, he stole...
She seems very nice.
Shh! Listen.
Shit, it's all found money to me anyway, you know?
Shit, ******, you smoke enough sherm...
Shit! Fucking cunt!
Shit! The guy hit me.
Shit! The guy hit me.
Shit! You motherfucker! Your ass fucking crazy!
Shoot him in the face. Put him down like a dog.
Shut up, all right? I'm going to blow this motherfucker away.
Sicilians were spawned by ******s.
Sit down. Shut up.
Sit. Sit, sit, sit.
Slapped her around a little bit. Kicked her in the stomach.
So he held on to it for about a year and a half...
So I can wipe this egg off my face.
So I had to dump my popcorn all over you.
So I just said, Alabama, come clean.
So I wrote him out a check. We went to breakfast in the morning.
So I'll sell it to you for $200,000. You go make a million with it.
So I'm handling the sales part, he's my silent partner...
So you got my letter? You lined up a buyer for me?
So, bottom line is I'm not Paramount.
So, I guess that makes you my best friend too.
So, our guy, Elliot Blitzer, he's making a deal between them and his boss...
So, the cops, they don't think... They're not after us.
So, we'd both fuck Elvis.
So, you got...
So, you have $500,000 worth of cola...
So, you'll be reading for the role of Marty.
Somethings amiss, I can feel it.
Son of a bitch shot me.
Son of a bitch was right. She tastes like a peach.
Son of a bitch.
Son...
Sorry, nothing personal.
Starting new lives, leaving Detroit, vacations, business trips...
Stick it in me, baby. Come on, stick it in Daddy.
Stick it in me. Go ahead.
Stop being so fucking calm about all this!
Sure.
Sweetie!
Sweetie!
Take care of that one for me.
Tell him I love him and tell him as of tomorrow
Tell him we got to go.
Tell him we got to go. Tell him, read the letter.
Tell me, or I'm going to pump two in your face right here, right now.
Tell me, what is the biggest, fattest hamburger you guys got?
Thank God. I could eat a horse, if you slap enough ketchup on it.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you. Thanks.
Thanks, thanks a lot, Daddy. You really came through for me.
That ain't the same thing as kissing his ass.
That is fucking real.
That is why blond hair, blue eyes...
That smarts, doesn't it? To get slammed in the nose.
That son of a bitch walking around breathing the same air as you.
That they changed the whole blood line forever.
That three words went through my mind endlessly.
That was beautiful.
That was one of the best times leverhad.
That was part of the act.
That whore your boy hangs around with...
That would be Steve's Double Chili Cheeseburger.
That's a long time.
That's a very nice outfit.
That's about all I ever eat.
That's all right. Accidents happen.
That's all, that's all. I'm sure now, okay?
That's great, all right, come on, let's go.
That's him. He called the place where I work.
That's it, fellas, let's get these sons of bitches.
That's it, fellas, let's get these sons of bitches.
That's it. End of story.
That's me, I'm me.
That's no problem. Now... Shit.
That's okay. Thanks.
That's perfect. That's great. That's wonderful.
That's the best goddamn fucking hamburger...
That's the way it goes. But don't forget...
That's the way romance is.
That's what we're doing here. Okay? You're gonna be okay, you're not gonna get hurt.
That's why I want to open Dr. Zhivago in L.A.
The Antichrist. You got me in a vendetta kind of mood.
The best in the world.
The biggest. The biggest movie you've ever dealt with, Lee.
The cops are gonna be here any fucking second!
The fuck don't deserve to live.
The guy is a Wop.
The guy was like a mad dog.
The honeymoon suite.
The man your son stole from.
The place you work.
The police department?
The second one, the second one ain't no fucking Mardi Gras either...
The Streetfighter, Return of the Streetfighter. ..
The third one is easy, you level right off.
The Virgin is back!
Then me and Bama here, we're gonna jump on a jet plane...
Then the Moors moved in there...
Then the third one.
Then they went.
Then, there's the fanatics. Right?
There are 17 different things a guy can do when he lies...
There he is.
There he is.
There is a party store down 54th Street.
There is a story behind all that. I'll tell you when I see you.
There's no way you could like me that much.
There's one guy that I know...
These aren't my clothes.
They all had blond hair and blue eyes.
They better fucking be great, they cost me enough.
They did so much fucking, with Sicilian women, huh?
They didn't tell me. Now, you just wait a minute and listen to me.
They grew up together.
They never thought to tell me where they were going.
They said to me, Clarence, that's the most accurate Vietnam film...
They're reliable, they're dependable, and they're safe.
This guy is packing.
This guy is really fucking funny.
This guy is too fucking rattled to be lying.
This guy was not just some wild flake.
This has nothing to do with me anymore, right?
This is a great place, this is nice.
This is Drexl's coke?
This is for Cody.
This is fucking real, Clarence.
This is it, baby.
This is quality stuff.
This isn't a good idea.
This will be packing them in for a year and a half.
This?
Three kung fu movies.
Three o'clock, Beverly Ambassador, he wants to see everybody. Okay?
To this, I always smile.
Tu rn offs?
Turn around. Turn around!
Two chili fries. And two large diet cokes.
Two in the back of the fucking head. Cops would throw a party, man.
Two years. That's two years you're not going to have to deal...
Uh huh.
Uh, Clarence...
Uh, no. Yeah. See, in the beginning of the movie he was hired to get this guy.
Uh, that's Dick on the end there.
Um, thanks.
Unloading. That's a hell of a way to describe the bargain of a lifetime.
Very difficult. That's very difficult, do you understand? Listen to me.
VINCENZO: That's of minor importance.
VIRGIL: What do you think of that?!
Wait a second.
Wait, can I speak to Clarence, please?
Wait, save the gorillas.
Wait, wait, wait. Can I speak to Clarence, please?
Wait! Wait!
Wand Sister Streetfighter.
Want a Chesterfield?
Want a hamburger or something? I'm fucking starving to death.
We deserve it.
We got lean pastrami, nice rye, anybody want anything?
We got married.
We got to go.
We got to put your boss in jail, okay?
We know what we're doing. Okay? We're the best at... Now, listen. No fucking around.
We now return to Bu/Iitt already in progress.
We park our cars in the same garage.
We should go somewhere where we can start from scratch.
We talked to your neighbors. They saw a Cadillac.
We'll let you know.
We're both here, we might as well enjoy the ride. All right?
We're going in for another one! Hang on, Elliot! Whoo!
We're going to have a little Q and A.
We're not negotiating, I don't like to barter.
We're selling uncut cocaine to get to the jamboree.
We're sitting down here, ready to negotiate.
We've known each other since childhood.
Well, apparently Drexl had his big toe stuck in that shit.
Well, because I'm standing with the guy, and he insists on talking to you.
Well, Daddy...
Well, don't just sit there, shoot him!
Well, enough about the King. How about you?
Well, for starters, what do you do?
Well, he ain't so much a good guy as he's just a bad motherfucker.
Well, he is, bar none, the finest actor working in martial arts movies today.
Well, I go to the movies every year on my birthday.
Well, I mean, I've been pretty scared about this whole thing.
Well, I want to talk to Drexl.
Well, if you don't hang around his circle, no reason it should.
Well, now, son.
Well, so I can go over there and pick up your stuff, that's why.
Well, tell me about yourself.
Well, that makes us practically related.
Well, that's all right. I'm his wife, Alabama Worley. Pleased to meet you.
Well, that's okay, Daddy, I tend to have that effect on people.
Well, the ring goes overboard.
Well, there ain't going to be a need to search me, daredevil.
Well, they do. All right? They do.
Well, they found nothing. In fact, they think it's drug related.
Well, we grew up together, that's why.
Well, well, well.
Well, what the fuck you want to talk to him about?
Well, where?
Well, you don't get to meet him in the audition...
What a face.
What a wonderful philosophy. Thanks for being such a sweetheart.
What are we gonna see?
What are you doing in L.A. anyway, huh?
What are you talking about?
What are your turn ons, your turn offs?
What are your turn ons?
What Clarence wants to do is to sell it.
What did he do to Arlene?
What did you do to end up with a son of a bitch like that?
What do you need from me? You need money?
What do you think about that, baby? What do you think about that?
What do you think, eight ball?
What do you want from me? Stop acting like an infant!
What do you want to know?
What is it? You're crying? What did I do? Did I do something?
What is of major fucking importance is that I believe you.
What kind of music do you like?
What kind of music do you like?
What the fuck is with this guy?
What the fuck you are talking about?
What the fuck you crying for, huh?
What the fuck's going on? What the fuck's going on, Joe?
What the fuck's waiting for us?
What you want to do is get him off.
What you're doing is genuine.
What, are you out of your fucking mind?
What, do you like a little coffee with your sugar, or what?
What, do you want to fuck me?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What's in the envelope right there is for my peace of mind.
What's the matter, baby, huh?
What's this acting class guy's name?
Whatever Bonnie wants.
When you said last night was one of the best times you ever had...
When's he coming back?
Where are you from? What's your favorite color?
Where did they go?
Where did they go?
Where do you think we should go, my little turtle dove?
Where is there a liquor store around here?
Where the fuck did he come from?!
Where you going?
Who are these guys?
Who the fuck are you?
Who the fuck do you think you...?
Who the fuck is Dick?
Who the fuck is Dick?
Who's Sonny Chiba?
Who's your favorite movie star?
Why does he trust you?
Why the fuck did he know your name?
Why, are there any others, Mr. Worley?
Why?
Why? Who is he?
Woman has got 20. Guy has got 17. But...
WOMAN: I had to come all the way from the highways and byways...
Would the both of you idiots shut up. I can't understand shit.
Would you like to go get some pie with me?
Would you rather it have been me?
Wow, what a swell place to work!
Wow. Thank you very much, Clarence.
Yeah, he trusts me, we were in 4 H together.
Yeah, I know, but it's not so bad. I mean, I'm pretty friendly...
Yeah, I love to get pie after a movie.
Yeah, I mean, I saw Coming Home in a Body Bag, I loved it, I'm not lying to the guy.
Yeah, it is pretty cool. I got the keys...
Yeah, man, I'm positive.
Yeah, motherfucker, I eat the pussy, I eat the bud.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, Sicilian.
Yeah, well, let me just tell you, if we get lost that's your ass.
Yeah, well, you stay out of trouble. Hm?
Yeah, yeah, you could say that.
Yeah, yeah. But I'm talking about the whole night.
Yeah, you're not kidding. We got lots to start over.
Yeah!
Yeah? Well, what happens if somebody does something that you can't hear...
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yes, I got an elbow right in the eye. Then, as if that's not enough...
Yes, I still have friends on the force.
Yes, I told him.
Yes, I would. A little one.
Yes.
Yo, Catherine, thank you, thank you.
Yo, man, fuck you guys, man. You guys are fucked up, all right?
You ain't even bothered to look.
You ain't even sat down yet.
You are an actor, I mean, I hear these Hollywood guys...
You are completely out of his reach. He poses absolutely no threat to you.
You are unbelievably cute.
You are your fucking mother, through and through.
You bet.
You better get used to that.
You can ask him because he'll be home in a minute. He plays football.
You can bring in the state militia, the L.A. Thunderbirds...
You can forget about acting for the next 20 years!
You can get in touch with me through him. All right.
You can tell I'm in love with her, can't you?
You can tell the angels in heaven...
You don't know him.
You don't think I'm kissing his ass or anything, do you?
You get paid a lot?
You get paid to check up on the box office girls?
You give me a fucking headache.
You go...
You got a lot of heart, kid, you know that?
You got a match? No, wait. No, no, don't bother, I got one.
You got a... You got a wife to think about now.
You gotten to the story on Elvis yet?
You just been clocking me.
You know what he'll do? He'll wear a wire.
You know what I'd like to do right now?
You know what I'm saying?
You know who I'm talking about?
You know why? I think because we got the same interests.
You know, I always said, if I had to fuck a guy. I mean, had to...
You know, I don't believe you.
You know, it's absolutely amazing to me...
You know, it's better.
You know? He can sell it, he can snort it...
You know? Most women.
You know...
You know...
You little cocksucker!
You little piece of shit!
You look a little like a blond Frankenstein.
You mind if I smoke?
You must have thought it was white boy day.
You see that?
You see that?
You see, way back then...
You show up all of a sudden, at 8:00 in the morning...
You stay with one guy?
You talking to me, you fucking wop, you?
You think a cop gives a fuck about a pimp?
You think I'm pretty fucking stupid, don't you? Don't you?
You think your boyfriend would go through this shit?
You thought it was pretty fucking funny. Didn't you?
You told him I'm an actor?
You took a cab to see three kung fu movies?
You wanna fuck with me?
You want a Goober?
You want me to suck his dick?
You want some beer?
You want something?
You want to get fucking shot?
You want to get un haunted?
You want to play with Daddy?
You want to play?
You want to see what Spiderman number one looks like?
You want to take me to a kung fu movie?
You were in hysterics a minute ago, so laugh!
You worked here a long time?
You!
You'd be up in there sucking ******s' dicks!
You'd do that?
You'll be unconscious soon through lack of oxygen.
You'll get married and you'll be so understanding to your wife's needs...
You'll get married and you'll be so understanding to your wife's needs...
You're a cantaloupe.
You're a fucking star. You're a fucking star...
You're a fucking star. You're a fucking star...
You're a very pretty girl, Alabama. But you ain't going to be very pretty for very long.
You're a whore?
You're an actor. Act, motherfucker.
You're not mad?
You're out here because you want me to help you in some way.
You're really in love, aren't you?
You're Sicilian, huh?
You're sick, you know what? I'm out of here.
You're so cool.
You're sort of roommates?
You're telling him what he wants to hear.
You're telling me that is going to be difficult?
Your fucking career is over! Take your fucking SAG card and burn it!
4900160th Street...
And, yeah, Alabama in the middle. LEE: Hello.
Apparently, I'm not as dumb DICK: Clarence, he didn't do nothing!
Are they staying here? No, they're staying at the...
Are you Dick Ritchie? No.
Are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine.
Ask him if he got the letter. Did you get the letter?
Asshole. After all I did for you, you fucking whore!
Be careful. I will.
Can we go? CLARENCE: We're out the door. We're gone.
Cigarette? No.
Clarence on the end. Lee, this guy is...
Clarence? You got it!
Come here. Hi, Dick. This is Alabama Worley.
Come inside. Okay.
Dick? Dick Richie? No.
Did you tell him I was a...? Shut up for a second.
Do me a favor. Turn around for me. Okay.
Do you know a Clarence Worley? Yes.
Do you know where we can find him? Yes, I do.
Elliot, you look like shit. Oh, I'm sorry.
Elliot. Yeah?
Elliot. Yeah?
Elliot. Elliot. What?
Fuck you, I'm bleeding! I'll call you a hearse.
Fuck you, this is your last chance! Boris.
Fuck! What?
Fucking put this in your purse. I'm not going to put that shit in my purse.
Get ahold of yourself. Okay.
Get him! Thank you, Mr. Richie.
Get on your knees. Oh, no.
Give me your hand. Okay.
Has he looked through it? Have you looked through it?
He'll wear a wire? He'll wear a wire, we talked to him.
Hello, Elliot. Monty.
Hello? Fuck.
Hello. Hello, baby!
Here, that should cover it, okey dokey? Okey dokey, doggy daddy.
Heroes for Sale? You got a boss, right?
Hey. Hi. Hi.
Hi, Lee. Elliot, where do you know this guy from?
Hi. Smells like hamburgers in here.
Honey, where you going? Bathroom.
How are you doing? Oh, pretty good.
I didn't get any letter. Has he gotten his mail yet?
I didn't get you any chicken. Well, how come?
I got the part. Wow!
I guess it's about that time. Yeah.
I love you. I love you too.
I need an ambulance! DIMES: Shut up.
I said, it'll get you high. ALABAMA: Hey, we got cable.
I think What you did... What?!
I was cool? Man, you were cooler than cool.
I'll take that. Well, you're going to have to.
If I thought I'd get away with it... Get away with it?
In case. In case of what?
Is there a problem? No,no.
It was scary. This motherfucker sounds beautiful.
Just do what they say! Man, this is your last fucking chance!
Just put it in your pants! No.
Kandi, you've got to help me. What can I do?
Knock on wood. You get to meet Captain Kirk?
Lee. Lee.
Lee. LEE: Boris, shut the fuck up!
Let's be nice. We don't wanna die. LEE: No, I certainly don't wanna die.
Like a ninja? Like a ninja.
Motherfuck! He's going to shoot him.
Nah. Shut the fuck up.
Name mean anything to you? No.
No problem on all counts. Great.
No. I don't want to go to jail. Then, what do we got to do?
No.No. Yes, yes.
Not a tiny little vial. A fucking baggy.
Nothing. Forget it. All right, come on.
Now get down on the fucking floor! LEE: Boris! Boris!
Now, Bama Bama. Yes, sir?
Officer Dimes! What?
Officer Dimes. What?!
Oh, God, I am so sorry. That's okay.
Oh, my God, I forgot my fucking vest. Stupid.
Oh, who the fuck is Dick? Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Well, I'd kill him.
Okay, okay. This is going to be fun.
Okay, one handed. One hand.
Okay, one handed. One hand.
Ready? Yeah.
Ready? Yeah.
Really? Well, when he was alive, not now.
Really? LEE: We don't have a title yet, but...
Right in my face. You should be careful.
Roller coaster. Roller coasters.
Safari Motel. Uh huh.
Safari Motel. Yes.
Say it! Dumb fucker.
She said that? What did she say? Come on, okay?
Shh! CLARENCE: Huh?
So, do you believe him? I believe he believes him.
Suspect's words. ...who's a front for him.
Take this. Take this. Hold this. What are you? High? No.
Tell him to go look through it. Go and look through it.
That he's buying this coke. Okay, champ?
That hurts, don't it? Uh huh.
That would be amazing. It would be cool, it would really be...
The letter I sent. The letter he sent.
There's Brian and Marty. Who?
Turn offs. Mm hm.
Uh huh. Now, no further, you understand.
Wait, wait, wait! CLARENCE: Come on, Dick!
Well, give me two of them bad boys. Uh huh.
Well, hello, Mrs. Worley. How do you do, Mr. Worley.
Well, who's your favorite movie star? Burt Reynolds.
What department? What department?
What did that day cost me? $357,000.
What do you do? I don't remember.
What do you mean? With you? No, with my friend Arlene.
What do you want from me? What?
What letter? What letter?
What makes you think that I could do that? Because you were a cop.
What the fuck are you laughing at? You look ridiculous!
What, did you beat her, or something? No, no, she got that playing basketball.
What's going on, Joe? Elliot's too far away.
What's the guy's name? Donowitz.
What's the matter with you? I'm sorry.
What's your favorite color? I don't know. Black?
What's your part in this again? I'm his wife.
Where are you from? I don't know.
Where did you get it? Where did I get it?
Where does it come from? Yeah.
Where the fuck is that bitch? She's with me.
Where? Where should we meet?
Where's that? Well...
Why are you here? I'm an actor.
Yeah, hello. Hi, Lee.
Yeah, yeah, I see what you mean. I mean, look at her.
Yeah, you Drexl? No, man, I'm Marty.
Yeah? Yeah, Safari Motel.
Yeah. Good fucking movie.
Yeah. Okay, what's his name?
You all right? It's good. Mm hm.
You call for a date? Huh?
You didn't do nothing. What is it?
You didn't hear nothing. I didn't hear nothing.
You got any aspirin? Yeah, sure. Get him that.
You got it. Fucking A.
You like it? Mm hm.
You like that, don't you? Fuck you!
You live here? Yes, I do.
You take care, I might be back. Yeah, man. Okay, be cool.
You told him I was good? Yeah, I lied.
You want to talk to Elliot? Let me talk to Elliot.
You're no longer an extra. NICHOLSON: Or a bit player.
You're the one who wanted to drive fast. Read my lips. No.
You're wild, I love it. Hey, Lee.
You've seen them? Mm hm.
...what does Joe like? Uh, Body Bags Two.
It's a pleasure to meet you. Nice to meet you, too.
It's okay, come on. You all right? No.
...$500,000 worth of cola...
...a care in the world. And who knows? Maybe he don't.
...about a movie like that.
...about some of this, let me shed some light.
...after only knowing you one night, and me being a call girl and all...
...and all I could smell was the violence in the air...
...and can use, $200,000 worth of coke.
...and didn't stop, until they were pretty sure everybody was dead.
...and drive a while, and then you gotta turn right, okay?
...and everything seemed so shitty.
...and go anywhere we want. Gives me a whole new outlook.
...and he knows, if I get fucked up, I won't drop dime on him.
...and I'm not a professional, I'm a rank amateur.
...and leaving a good looking corpse.
...and leaving a good looking corpse. You know?
...and let the chips fall where they may...
...and nothing, well, maybe less, sometimes.
...and point my finger at you? No! I never did. Everybody else did, but I didn't.
...and putting it in his own pocket.
...and some...
...and spend the rest of our lives spending.
...and talk about it. It's sort of a little tradition I have.
...and tell that cocksucker that the production manager reports...
...and that bitch whore girlfriend of his, brought this all on themselves.
...and very easy, and very little risk, Clarence.
...and was to change our lives forever.
...and you grab an egg roll and start to chow down...
...and you're gonna be playing your one man show...
...and you're lying to me, I'm gonna fucking die.
...Apartment 48.
...as you did in the face of the man who killed you.
...became black hair and dark skin.
...because that pussy won't be tight enough for you anymore.
...because you still feel the same thing, except it's more diluted.
...because you'll know what it feels like to be a woman.
...because your son, the cowboy, and his flame, came into the room blazing...
...big time fucking movie producer named Lee Donowitz.
...bullshit, read comic books.
...but I am not scared of that motherfucker.
...but if I get the part, hope, hope...
...but it's better than the first one...
...but you're a fucking movie producer, you know.
...did I ever ask you for anything? No. I didn't.
...did I ever get in your shit about it?
...did you mean, physically?
...Elvis.
...except rocking and rolling, living fast, dying young...
...for his sweetheart and he wears it around his neck on a chain.
...from a diddle eyed Joe to damned if I know.
...from time to time, if you need it.
...fun, fun, fun. You all right? Mm hm.
...great grandmother fucked a ******.
...half a million dollars worth of coke from the property cage.
...he can play Santa Claus with it as far as I'm concerned.
...he could play Joe fucking Hollywood until the wheels come off.
...he don't got to worry about nothing. He just sit down...
...he saw his chance and he took it, that's all.
...he works for me in a courier capacity. Well, apparently...
...he's going to be able to afford to just throw it around.
...her pimp is an associate of mine.
...his two pantied granny, and the fucking king of Siam...
...I am 100 percent...
...I can't stand them. They're all safe, geriatric coffee table dog shit, you know?
...I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.
...I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.
...I ever had in my entire life.
...I got hurled the ball right when I'm not looking. Wham!
...I have ever seen on the face of the planet.
...I hope everything works out with you and Alabama.
...I look back and am amazed...
...I love you.
...I mean, since Deer Hunter.
...I say to myself, This motherfucker, he's carrying on like he ain't got...
...I sure as hell wouldn't tell no goddamn body about it.
...I was carrying your child, babe.
...I will never lie to you again.
...I would never have guessed that true romance and Detroit would go together.
...I'd fuck Elvis.
...I'd just tell you, none of your fucking business.
...I'll be like one of those guys.
...I'm not guaranteeing you anything.
...if he had any on him. I mean, this guy was a sissy.
...if my life depended on it...
...if that is a fact, tell me:
...if you don't know shit, then why does he think that you can sell it?
...if you know them, like you know your own face...
...in Hollywood. That's where we're going to be.
...in my entire life. Look at this.
...is a little game of show and tell. And you don't want to show me nothing.
...is also dealing cocaine. We've got to prove it in court, and you've got to do it.
...is fucking stupid, and he's got a big bag of coke and it's uncut.
...it goes the other way too.
...it's because it's a lie.
...it's better to have a gun and not need it...
...left his driver's license in the dead guy's hand.
...like pulls out a gun, and puts it to my fucking eye?
...like the stars at dawn.
...make something for somebody, all right?
...make your answers genuine.
...monitoring you the whole time.
...nightly for the next two fucking years!
...of company as of late.
...of Tallahassee, Florida...
...on my phone about that?
...people who grew up with him, people who love his music.
...question you've been asking yourself.
...Rio Bravo, that's a movie.
...Safari Motor Motel Inn. Safari Motel.
...say that about my project, it makes the whole thing worthwhile. Here's to you.
...Sicilians are great liars.
...Sicilians have black blood pumping through their hearts.
...Sicilians were like wops from northern Italy.
...since 1984.
...so help me God.
...so I just come in, you know, read comics, play music.
...so much in love with each other, what the hell are you doing here?
...so they bring the suspect to me and Nicholson, and we go to work on him.
...so we can get through all this getting to know you stuff, all right?
...still carry that ****** gene.
...than hang around upside down on a roller coaster all day.
...than to need a gun and not have it.
...that could help you out, Clarence, but...
...that dirty little whore found out we were going to do some business...
...that he's taking 30 cents of every dollar...
...that my thoughts were so clear and true.
...that Sicilians...
...that tastes like French vanilla ice cream?
...that tastes like French vanilla ice cream?
...that this man, a very respectable man in the Hollywood community...
...that was the bitch of the bunch.
...that you are unloading for $200,000.
...that you're unloading for $200,000.
...the ghost of Steve fucking McQueen, ten fucking Roman gladiators.
...The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, that's a movie...
...the Moors conquered Sicily. And the Moors are ******s.
...the more I think you did the right thing.
...the rest of my life in jail. Hey, man, I don't blame you.
...then go back to Drexl and fuck yourself.
...then it just seems silly you lose all your things now, that's all.
...there's a woman with her breasts just hanging out.
...they changed the whole country.
...they get it delivered to the set all the time.
...they would beat lie detectors all to hell. Now, what we got here...
...they'd ever seen.
...this friend of mine got access to the evidence room.
...to admit On tape, all right? Uh huh.
...to bring the heavy artillery to a business meeting.
...to give himself away. A guy has got 17 pantomimes.
...to go back to Drexl and fuck yourself...
...to go on a honeymoon. He asked me if he could borrow $500.
...to Motor City, Detroit to find my true love.
...to think to this day, hundreds of years later...
...until he found a guy he could trust. And he trusts you?
...until you get your ass back into my loving arms.
...waiting for you guys to grow some guts, all right?
...wants to deal with you, he'll deal with you.
...was so romantic.
...watch my motherfucking TV.
...what I want to be doing, but couldn't. What?
...what my birthday movie was gonna be.
...what the attraction is after all these years.
...when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots...
...when you fuck with me, white boy!
...whenever I'm offered a deal that's too good to be true...
...with a smoking gun in your hand...
...with a young girl saying that he got married.
...with anybody else's movie but mine, all right?
...with most of the customers. So I just hang out, you know...
...with your fear and desire.
...you are fucking killing me. Wait, wait. There, wait. Shh!
...you are going to be the first one shot.
...you are part eggplant.
...you can cut that a hell of a lot more.
...you didn't have a dick.
...you like kung fu movies. You like The Partridge Family...
...you never seen evil so singularly personified...
...you understand what I'm talking about?
...you walk in here like a goddamned bulldozer.
...you'll get away with it. Clarence, I like you.
...your dumb ass will do a lot of motherfucking things.
...your eyes fill up with water.
[AEROSMITH'S THE OTHER SIDE PLAYS ON RADIO]
[ALABAMA LAUGHING]
[ALABAMA LAUGHS]
[ALABAMA LAUGHS]
[ALABAMA SOBBING]
[ALARM RINGING]
[AUTOMATIC GUNFIRE]
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
[BOTH LAUGH]
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[CAR HORN HONKS]
[CHARLIE SEXTON'S GRACELAND PLAYS OVER SPEAKERS]
[CHATTERING]
[CHATTERING]
[CRYING]
[CRYING]
[DREXL LAUGHS]
[GASPING]
[GRUNTING]
[GRUNTS]
[GUNSHOTS]
[GUNSHOTS]
[HIP HOP MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]
[HUMMING]
[IMITATING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
[IN ENGLISH] Hey, boss.
[IN ITALIAN]
[IN ITALIAN]
[JERRY DELMONICO'S ALL THE WAY PLAYS OVER SPEAKERS]
[JERRY DELMONICO'S EVERYBODY LOVES SOMEBODY PLAYS ON OAR STEREO]
[KNOCKING]
[KNOCKING]
[LAUGHING]
[LAUGHING]
[LUCA SPEAKING IN ITALIAN]
[LUCA SPEAKS IN ITALIAN]
[MAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ON TV]
[MEN YELLING INDISTINCTLY]
[MENTOR SINGING HEARTBREAK HOTEL]
[MUSIC PLAYS ON TV]
[MUSIC PLAYS ON TV]
[NYMPHOMANIA'S I WANT YOUR BODY PLAYS OVER SPEAKERS]
[PHONE RINGS]
[PHONE RINGS]
[RINGS]
[ROBERT PALMER'S (LOVE IS) THE TENDER TRAP PLAYS ON CAR STEREO]
[SCREAMING ON TV]
[SCREAMING]
[SCREAMS]
[SHELBY LYNNE'S I NEED A HEART TO COME HOME TO PLAYS ON STEREO]
[SINGING HEARTBREAK HOTEL]
[SINGING LITTLE BITTY TEAR]
[SIREN WAILING]
[SIREN WAILING]
[SIRENS WAILING]
[SIRENS WAILING]
[SOBBING]
[SOUNDGARDEN'S OUTSHINED PLAYS ON STEREO]
[SPEAKING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
[SPEAKING IN ITALIAN]
[SPEAKING IN ITALIAN]
[SPEAKS IN ITALIAN]
[SPEAKS IN ITALIAN]
[THE SHIRELLES' WILL YOU LOVE ME TOMORROW PLAYS OVER SPEAKERS]
[THUNDER RUMBLING ON FILM]
[VINCENZO LAUGHING]
[VIRGIL SCREAMING]
[VOMITS]
[WOMAN SCREAMING]
[WOMEN SCREAMING]
[YELLING IN ITALIAN]
[YELLING]
[YELLS]
$200,000. It means the world to us.
211? Yeah, 211.