Horrible Bosses 2 (2014) Edit

A hundred percent untraceable.

A lot of guys wear pink.

A week later, once the smoke clears, we'll

Absolutely. So smart.

After a bit, the shampoo's gonna automatically

After Kurt's little performance, there's no way he's gonna call the cops.

After we had a few beers, we came up with the, uh, Shower Buddy.

Agreed on both points. How about the deal?

Ah, fuck.

Ah, fuck. Fucking idiots.

Ah, Shit.

Ah! Ah, ha, ha! Yes.

Ah! You had us.

Ah. I like it.

Ah. Ugh.

Ah. Well, okay. I do have a very big problem.

All good. How are things out there, Nick?

All I'm asking you to do is finish your own plan but for double the money.

All right, it's ringing.

All right, let's not chitchat now. The man does have a gun.

All right, let's talk dress code.

All right, maybe I did.

All right, Nick. Look, my word is still good.

All right, we're back in 20 seconds.

All right, we're on our way to you. Chickens have left the pot. My God, my God.

All right? So if any of them cavalry follow you down in the garage...

All right.

All time shittiest idea you guys ever had. Can't believe you talked me into this.

Also sexual harassment.

And at night, when I close my eyes...

And don't think we don't know you got the law with you. That's something we do know.

And easy, and nothing sexual is even happening here.

And I admire the way he bent you three idiots

And I will let you know if I see Swiper.

And I'm not talking about throwing yourself off a building or some sleeping pills shit.

And if you do, you will find your son returned home lickety splickety.

And if you're on the 405 freeway, you're probably already late for work.

And in such a scenario, you'd rather me have the cash than him.

And Nick and Dale disappear with the cash.

And one day, you will pass on...

And sees us, we're in prison right now.

And take it.

And the pictures of us from when we used to be friends?

And then I found my way up here and I found this phone.

And then I need you to proceed north onto Figueroa and await further instructions.

And then when you, uh, set me free...

And then, you assaulted me.

And there's the last name.

And things didn't shake out too well for you boys.

And through risk and hard work, I made my own American dream come true.

And today we have three modern day...

And we have it. You don't.

And we tell him if anyone follows him in, his son's a fucking corpse.

And we wait for that money train to roll in.

And we're back in five, four...

And we're out. Very good, guys. We're back in 90 seconds.

And you bring the amount that we agreed upon and you come alone.

And you guys do distribution.

And you keep that bitch sedated until Daddy pays up.

And your loan officer has assured me no extension will be granted.

And, uh, we started meeting together to talk about the invention...

And, well, we got some talking to do and...

And...?

Any requests? Landing strip? Dinner roll?

Anyway, as an added bonus, I will also own your patent...

Anyway, I want you guys to have this.

Anyway, so, what's even going on?

Appreciate it.

Are we happy with these numbers?

Are we talking about him or Predator? I'm terrible with metaphors.

Are you gonna leave this mess in the bottom of my sink?

Are you kidding me? Turn it the other way.

Are you kidding? It's great.

Are you out of your mind, Mrs. Miyagi? Get over here.

Are you serious? Yeah.

Aren't we dressed as bellhops when we escape with the money?

As soon as Bert's car is underground, heh, the police lose...

At first I was just gonna take all the money and throw you guys under the bus.

At one point of the night, you'd better make sure that, that one is in this one.

At that moment, your company will go into foreclosure...

Aw, that looks bad. That looks bad.

Bad example.

Be fucking serious. Come on. This is not helpful. Think seriously.

Be sitting poolside, splitting up the cash.

Be triggered out of the showerhead...

Because of the hue of my skin I know where to get date **** drugs?

Because you're not a jungle cat, and it's stupid as shit.

Because...

Before we get to the product, can you tell us...

Bert has Kurt's phone with our contact information on it.

Bert's car goes underground, right?

Bet y'all loving this fence now.

Better than having some strange dude with you.

Better?

Big mouth. Nothing behind it.

Boring.

Bought the company is keeping us on to run it.

Boy, he shined a light on that, didn't he? That's true. You're absolutely right.

Boy, I'd love it if you'd stop saying my name.

Boy, it sounds awesome, but there's no way to get it done.

Boys, I hate to break it to you, but the American dream, it's made in China.

Boys, we are doing this. The adventure begins. Who's fired up?

Bride Again Magazine?

But Boulder Stream needs to be your exclusive retailer.

But if we do come up with something really inspired...

But it just water.

But then when Dad called the cops and proved he doesn't give a fuck about me...

But there was once, though. There was once...

But there's one little problem, Dale.

But we got you.

But when he gets there...

But when he gets there...

But you guys, your employees, for God's sake.

But, hey, here's an idea. My friend Kurt here loves to plow.

But, hey, speaking of bosses, after the break...

But, I don't know, I think running your own company into the ground...

But, uh, purchasing a store requires...

But, you know, let's just give the guy a job.

By the time the cops know they've been had...

By the way, what the hell were you doing back

Bye bye.

Bye.

Cake and balloons. Don't think that's overdoing it?

Call coming in. Roar by Katy Perry.

Call me Motherfucker.

Call your phone. If he's talking, he's not gonna look through it.

Can be very proud to be in business with.

Can I have one minute? Just love to talk to my partners.

Can I talk to you outside, please?

Can we get some help here?

Can you explain what's happening?

Can you imagine if someone stole one of them?

Can't we just come up with some kind of plan, though?

Catch.

Cheaper than I could have gotten them from the Chinese.

Cogs are good.

Cogs. Guh.

Coma boner? What?

Come here, you. Happy birthday.

Come on, Dale, this pussy isn't gonna eat itself.

Come on, man.

Come on, this guy's a master business prick.

Come on.

Come on. Hurry it up. Hurry it up. Come on.

Come on. It's just material things. Can't take it with you.

Come on. Let's go.

Come on. Let's not argue, okay? We came up with an awesome plan.

Cops will stay with the money, wait for the kidnappers to receive the drop.

Cuff this crazy asshole. And beat the shit out of him while you're at it.

Dad, is that you? Please. They're crazy.

Dad, what are you talking about? We never make this kind of deal.

Dad!

Dad.

Dale, I'm gonna need that ball back. Good luck building something in America.

Dale, let's put this down. What was the plan here, buddy?

Dale, uh, had just gotten back from one of those self service car washes...

Dale, we had a lot of laughs.

Dale, you know, I just wanna know, where did the idea come from...

Dale?

Dale.

Dale's gonna help out. Thank you, buddy.

Damn right you did because you are awesomely gay.

Did it just graze me, or...?

Did you guys wear those tight little onesies?

Did you have a plan if he responded?

Did you know that when men are in a coma they can still get an erection?

Did you suck that cock like a Bomb Pop down to the blue?

Didn't wanna just use our phones?

Discover that you killed my poor father...

Do it. Do it.

Do me a favor. Hurry up.

Do you golf with the other hand...?

Do you like Predator?

Do you mean aluminum?

Do you see this? This is Jimi Hendrix's actual guitar.

Doctors are gonna let you out.

Does anybody have a visual?

Does that zip all the way down?

Doesn't matter what you do, girl

Don't call my kids potatoes.

Don't go to Dale.

Don't need it. Your eyes speak. You seem honest.

Don't say my name, Kurt.

Don't start laughing. What is funny about this?

Don't wanna be like, Or the grown man dies.

Don't whistle.

Don't worry. I took a parkour class at the community center.

Don't worry. We're gonna get you fixed up.

Don't you throw it at me. You slide it. Do it again.

Drive out and await the location of the drop.

Dude, get your fucking head out of my crotch.

Dude. Oh, my God.

Easy, Julia. Blanston, would you like to share with us what's led you into recovery?

Either this ends right now, or it ends with bullets in your skulls.

Either way.

Empty shriveled sacs. They're shriveled. I should know that just looking at you.

Enjoy the rest of the day off, everyone. You've earned it.

Enjoy.

Even if you had the money to fight him in the courts...

Every... This guy.

Everybody seems very happy. This was a great idea.

Excellent news.

Excuse me, Dr. Harris. Was someone in the office last night?

Fail to open up the front door so we can get the fuck out of here.

Fifty fifty chance it's gonna be open.

Fifty fifty, yeah.

Find My iPhone.

Find out whatever his beverage of choice is before he goes to bed.

First of all, if anyone, I'm the smart one. I'm Lily Tomlin.

First we're gonna tie up Rex... Fuck off, everyone.

Five million dollars is nothing to him.

Following us is already a part of their plan.

For a guy not into code names...

For real? Swear to God.

Found this gentleman loitering out in your hall.

Fourth Street Bridge, he's gonna have him drop it over the side.

From a legal standpoint...

Fuck out of here, Jane Fonda.

Fuck you! I love Sandra Bullock! I'm running hot.

Fucking McDonald's.

Fucking what?

Gah, gah, gah. You know? You know what I'm talking about.

Genius. Dale, uh...

Get in there. Get him.

Get that chair ready. I'm gonna take a tinkle.

Get the loose rope. I don't want him to...

Get the money.

Get up, get up, get up, and get out

Get your goddamn kids out of the fantasy.

Get your mouths off his dick, okay?

Getting together with the guys.

Girls. I have three girls, dude.

Give me the marker, I'll get a better idea.

Give me the watch back.

Give us one second.

Give us the $500,000..

Go ahead. Call them. We never kidnapped you.

Go to the bench on the 4th Street Bridge to make the drop.

God, grant us...

God, I tell you what.

Goddamn it.

Goddamn it. It's those idiots.

Good call. How about this? Butt, face, puss.

Good for him.

Good luck out there, boys.

Good, well, we were just trying to be funny.

Gotta make it last

Grab it!

Great. That's great news.

Guess who's got the gun now.

Guys, I completely underestimated you.

Guys, that was great.

Guys. Guys, how's this anything but great news?

Ha, ha! Hey, nice job...

Ha, ha! Look at you. I got you again.

Ha, ha! There we go. That's our guy.

Ha, ha. Dale, come on. You think I'd give you a loaded gun?

Ha, ha. Pretty sweet. All right, so I'm guessing we saved the business.

Ha! There they are. There are my shower buddies.

Ha. All right?

Hands up. Relax. Please, put your guns down.

Hang on a second. Hey, freeze.

Hang on. Three million dollars? We'll take that.

Hanson approaching. ETA, two minutes.

Hanson made the drop, stay on the money.

Hanson.

Happened a long time ago.

He called the police anyway.

He found it.

He had one cock at 14 and it hasn't made its way to his mouth yet.

He just has to look good from a distance.

He kidnapped himself. He'll sneak in any second.

He killed his father.

He married his maid?

He only cried, like, a little bit.

He thinks he's in an AA meeting.

He thought, Why don't they make one of these for your body?

He was supposed to be tied up to that chair.

He's a billionaire. He's not gonna risk my life over $5 million.

He's at the top of his game. We need to figure out...

He's forcing us to kidnap him, and I'm crowding him?

He's gonna be way too heavy. Let's move.

He's gonna get away with this.

He's gonna help? Okay, I got a notepad. I got a notepad.

He's gonna putt. He's just gonna putt.

He's got gloves in his golf bag.

He's got good taste.

He's just a really, really, really likable guy. I like him a lot.

He's not. We're trying to stay out of prison.

He's spinning out.

He's walking away from me. He might have been a bad hire.

Heh, yeah. The one he did the fire and fingers

Heh. What, are you cheating on me, Dale?

Heh. What, are you cheating on me, Dale?

Hello, Nick...

Hello?

Hello. Get your thumb off the butt...

Hello. Howdy do.

Help me help you get revenge on my asshole dad...

Help me help you get revenge on my asshole...

Help me out.

Her affliction?

Here we go.

Here we go. Here we go.

Here, I'll let them know. Hold on.

Hey

Hey, fellas, thanks for coming.

Hey, freeze. Freeze.

Hey, guys.

Hey, hey. If you're coming in for the morning grind...

Hey, homey. Let me speak to Mr. Bert Hanson.

Hey, I think that's exciting.

Hey, if you want hope, listen to him.

Hey, Kim, seriously, though. Can we keep a dry sink from here on in?

Hey, my man. There's trouble.

Hey, Obama. I'm breaking into my old office.

Hey, Rex? It's off, pal.

Hey, that's awesome.

Hey, there she is. Boys.

Hey, uh, Dale Arb... Uh...

Hey, what's that? Who's calling you?

Hey, whoa, Dale.

Hey, whoa. Guys, you can't just park right in front of the guy's house.

Hey!

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey. Hey, that's my phone. He has my phone.

Hey. Hey. Talk to me. How was it?

Hey. Hold up. The Blade's got a visual. He's here. He's here.

Hey. We're back. We'll stay here...

Hi, Blanston. Hi.

Hi. It's going, uh...

His dad sold him out for... It was probably nothing to him.

Hmm? Right. You can't even tell at that age.

Hmm.

Hmm. That's great. That makes total sense.

Hmm. Well, uh, first time on the slopes, so I'm gonna stay off the black diamond.

Hola, Lupe.

Hold on, pal.

Hold on. He knows what we sound like. We gotta use an accent.

Hold the line

Holy shit. Boulder Stream loves the Shower Buddy.

Holy shit. He's Fight Clubbing himself. We got a Fight Clubber.

Honey, no one's head's going in my lap. It's

Hopefully he's hearing a voice like that when he reads.

How about if we just put our heads together? We brainstorm a little.

How are you? In the flesh.

How do I know you really have my boy?

How do you kidnap somebody without them knowing...

How long was I out?

How'd that come up?

How's it going?

However the fuck you spell it. You know what

I am Blanston.

I am in...

I bet that tears you up something fierce.

I call lookout.

I can just drive right home.

I can make sure Dad pays up.

I can motorboat her boobies and then smack on her butt.

I can't believe she's fucking doing that. She's not going in deep enough.

I can't believe you're buying that acting. I mean, it's good, but...

I can't take you to the next scene any better than that. I can't.

I can't think.

I cannot go in the puss. That'll make me the most guilty.

I could pump it manually.

I did put it on there.

I did say handsome fee, right?

I did. And I was very amused by it.

I didn't wanna say anything, but way better than murder.

I do not need that sass mouth. What I need

I don't know what's going on here, and I don't give a shit.

I don't know where I'm going. I don't know where you find pay phones.

I don't know. Do you really own anything in this lifetime?

I don't know. I could use the money for Stacy and the girls.

I don't really give a shit about that.

I don't want you to thank me. Just go home and enjoy your family.

I fell asleep at the office, and...

I figured those guys have been bumping tacos.

I get that. But maybe it's not just about the money.

I got a lot of holes going in.

I got extra supplies. I think we gotta be more careful this time.

I got it. Yeah?

I got it. I got it. I got it.

I got you something.

I gotta call you back.

I gotta fire them all now? We just hired them.

I gotta get going. Gotta wait to be saved at the warehouse by the cops. See you.

I gotta get that phone back. So many dick pics.

I guess it's him. Stay with him.

I had a dream for a long time to get my own business.

I had the thing where you go on the zip line to the trampoline to the skateboard.

I hate to break up the car party, but, Rex,

I have an idea. Why don't you try a suicide pact?

I have not laughed like that in a long time.

I have the same ringtone. It's an inspiring ringtone.

I have to agree with Nick.

I have to. The only way to get this train going.

I heard Jack Leibowitz. Is that an attorney?

I hope this doesn't sound cocky. I think we're really good at this.

I just can't say it.

I just realized. You actually thought you were bringing me good news.

I just wanna hear you say it.

I just... I don't know. Pretty normal.

I knew I never said anything about kidnapping.

I knew you did. Get into business with me, you're gonna have fucking loads of it.

I know Bert Hanson. I like the cut of his jib.

I know both of your numbers. 323...

I know what the fuck 9 to 5 is. It's about the white bitch with the big titties.

I know. Are you kidding me? Poor, poor guy.

I like Predator a great deal.

I love pussy.

I love that. I like that.

I make new enemies every day. It's called business.

I mean also, not the sequel.

I mean, all of that sexual energy...

I mean, come on. Duh.

I mean, I don't know if it's about should, but...

I mean, I wake up, I find you three in my closet...

I mean, she's so free. She's so eloquent with her body.

I mean, these guys make loads of money selling stuff...

I mean, why would you do that?

I need a half a million dollars. I don't need shit ideas and a bunch of hot air.

I need you to go underground into parking. I need you to get to Spot 4421.

I pick up your dry cleaning.

I really appreciate it. I mean, you made me smile.

I really couldn’t... Your fucking face.

I respect you gentlemen for wanting to roll up your sleeves and build something...

I said let me see it.

I said puss will make me the most guilty. You're not helping me! Shut up!

I said, Dale starts the gas.

I still have the cash and I'm heading to the drop.

I tell you what. If a couple tiny things went our way, we could've pulled that off.

I think he said no.

I think he's gonna be flipping out to see us out on his course.

I think I'll take it from here, okay?

I think Julia's headed into the building.

I think she has an amazing fucking body...

I think she said she's gonna fuck my wife.

I think we were. Two 14 year old boys at camp...

I thought there was supposed to be some sweet ass...

I told you. Works just as promised, okay?

I tried to tell them to stop, and they started crying.

I wanna dig in on the one time fee because...

I wanna partner up on this thing.

I want you to have it.

I was a little insulted you only asked for

I was on the fence.

I was really clear my life was in danger.

I was thinking there was a chance...

I was trying to hit him.

I was trying to participate. I didn't have anything to...

I was wrong. That idea sucks, the movie sucks and so do you.

I will always be with you

I wish you were there to read it. Sounds scary in that voice.

I wish you'd slow down. You wouldn't make mistakes.

I would marry Ed Helms, fuck Bradley Cooper and kill Zach Galifianakis.

I wouldn't be surprised if he gives us a membership.

I'll have supervised visits at McDonald's.

I'll refer you to my contact at Pacific Shore National.

I'll take care of Stacy and your boys.

I'll take care of them.

I'll take one. Sure.

I'm about to call the cops when I think, Hold up a sec.

I'm afraid I'm gonna have to cancel that order.

I'm booking a spa day for me and Stacy.

I'm fucking you over.

I'm gonna call the police and send you to jail.

I'm gonna cut right to it, gentlemen. a home run.

I'm gonna find Dr. Mike, tell him you're talking.

I'm gonna go freshen up. Why don't you guys suck each other off to get ready?

I'm gonna go with a maid.

I'm gonna think up one real quick and lay it on you.

I'm in trouble.

I'm in. Let's do it.

I'm just saying that maybe you guys might want a little advice.

I'm like, Holy shit. These fuckers were gonna gas me.

I'm not bi.

I'm not gay. Go on, go on. I'll be right out.

I'm not giving him this. This is a Tag Heuer.

I'm not gonna kidnap someone based on 9 to 5.

I'm not in love with her. That's ridiculous.

I'm not really, ugh, good at this kind of thing, you know? Um...

I'm positive I'm not hearing that right.

I'm sorry, sir.

I'm sorry, that name's not official yet.

I'm sorry. I'm running hot. The whole fucking thing's got me upset.

I'm sorry. There's a hole in the back. I'm gonna stick my finger in it.

I'm sorry. This is so fucking embarrassing.

I'm super gay. Never been straight. Know what else I've never been?

I'm sure that we can accommodate you, Mr. Jones.

I'm talking about a way where... That's good.

I'm talking about us.

I'm talking about, you fuck each other to death.

I'm talking about. Kidnapping. Come on.

I'm willing to make love to her, if that's required.

I've been keeping my eye on you since you broke into my office.

I've come around to the whole fence thing.

I've got quite an impressive trophy room filled with cocks.

If he was tied up here the whole time, how could Rex have the same phone?

If somebody took my Pinkberry, I wouldn't take that sitting down.

If the worst thing that happens from this clusterfuck is your domestic problems...

If they see him out walking free, they just might believe your ass. Let's go.

If we bring that down to $300, you've got...

If we don't come up with a ransom plan that you love, we pull the plug.

If we're switching positions, she'll lose track of who's where.

If we've learned one thing about ourselves, it's that we're not murderers.

If you could come back out to the car, we can go home.

If you don't buy, we are ruined.

If you want the truth, I'm your fucking guy, all right? This is bad news.

If you'd get your thumb off the fucking button and...

If you're looking for more than a quick fix...

If your boss gives you a hard time about it, have him come down here and talk to...

In all honesty, it's too many. I'm pretty overwhelmed.

In minutes, the police will be down here and

In these moments, it's more impactful to be still.

Is he telling the truth?

Is that a Sharpie?

Is that bad?

Is that Dale?

Is that his wife?

Is that sack of cash. Now, get it over here.

It doesn't reach. Should it reach?

It is a lot of freight.

It is Bring Your Kids to Work Day, not Put Your Kids to Work Day.

It is smart. It is mad creative.

It looked so good on paper.

It looks like we don't know what we're doing.

It me, Kim Song.

It was a bad idea, it really was.

It was a blow job. It was a blow job, only. Didn't fuck her.

It was a wonderful idea. Didn't work out.

It was like something I've just never encountered.

It won't be in existence. You can have that.

It'll cost 51 percent share of your company.

It's a relief, you know?

It's a wonder your parents didn't smother you...

It's all just material. Electrons, protons.

It's basic math. What's up with you tonight?

It's been a long week.

It's been touch and go, but you're gonna be fine.

It's bent, goddamn it.

It's brilliant. Who came up with that thing about me being a little boy?

It's called her vagina, Nick.

It's for my kitties.

It's gonna cost you 2 percent share of your company.

It's good stuff. Learn something.

It's just like on that morning show. You're always fighting. I love it.

It's just ridic... I can't... It's so upsetting.

It's just the three of us doing this, not us and the NSA.

It's just too goddamn easy.

It's like a weight lifted off your... What is it, shoulders?

It's nice to have fresh blood in the group.

It's not a crazy idea, but it's not worth a Swiss watch.

It's not a spy store. It's a convenience store.

It's not even true, actually. We're not criminals. All right?

It's not some strange dude, as I've said many times. It's your buddy.

It's P H A T B A L L... ...L L Z...

It's the only thing you went in there to buy.

It's true, Dale. Coma boners.

It's up to you, buddy.

It's weird you're hauling around a cat stand.

Jailbroken.

Jesus Christ. Dale, you gotta stop sweating, pal.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Just because your dad called the cops doesn't mean he doesn't love you.

Just been hitting it hard. I've been hitting it hard.

Just do a Southern accent.

Just... Yeah. I don't wanna upset this guy.

Keep your toes. Time to call it off.

Kidnapped?

Kill them.

Kim, you grab my shirts?

Kim? You here?

Kim.

Kimchi.

Kings have Vancouver. Great matchup. Place will be packed.

Knock down the old gray wall

Knock it off. Look, this is no big deal.

Know this.... spends 50 hours a week working.

Know what we can do? We can use my golf gloves in my bag.

Know what's going on? You're holding a grudge right now. Yes, you do that.

Kurt, I think I'm gonna miss you the most.

Kurt, what are you? A 32 waist?

Kurt, you gotta stop hiring hot unqualified women.

Kurt.

Kurt's gonna turn on the shower. You're gonna see the water come out.

L... I don't know. But, I mean, if he is...

Lead the cops to that warehouse before your boy gets there.

Legal standpoint.

Let me ask you a question.

Let me ask you, has your company done business recently with a Mr. Bert Hanson?

Let me see it.

Let the past be the past.

Let them enjoy the pool, let me enjoy the money.

Let's check our fancy new camera system.

Let's do it.

Let's fucking kill them! I want them dead!

Let's go. All right.

Let's head upstairs. Let's talk about this product. Is that corduroy?

Let's just do what we gotta do, do it confidently and, uh, we should be fine.

Let's run it down from the top.

Let's use our phones. They make a record of everything that we say and do.

Listen, bucko. You don't wanna make enemies out of us, okay?

Listen, I hustle, I don't steal.

Listen, relax, okay? He's not even gay.

Listen, you lowlife bottom feeder, I don't have time for this little fuck around.

Listen. He's being so protective.

Little turtleneck? Anteater?

Live TV. What are you gonna do?

Long story. Anyway, your timing could not have been better. Is this a fucking marlin?

Look at that little chubby face.

Look at this. Unknown caller.

Look at those babies. Oh, Dale, they look just like you.

Look how blue his eyes get when he's crying.

Look like the grasshopper found himself...

Look up Boulder Stream. Boulder Stream.

Look, man, if we give up now, I'll be just fine, you know?

Look, Nick's gonna hit them with facts and figures, because he's the brains, right?

Look, uh, this is such a stupid thing, honey.

Looking at you is like looking out over the Grand Canyon of ineptitude.

Lots and lots of coma boners.

Lupe. All right.

Majestic, in position.

Man.

Marry Crackle, fuck Snap, kill Pop. Right?

Maybe from the first movie.

Maybe just accept the fact that we'll always be cogs in the machine.

Me.

Mine was an accident. Yours was on purpose.

Miss Lang, will you come in here a moment?

Mm hm. That's my code name, Nick.

Mm hm. Right up here.

Mm hm. So y'all plan to use the ransom to save your business.

Mm. Let's get you prepped for a fill n drill.

More the merrier. I love this idea. You got a lot of stuff sticking out.

Most things are.

Motherfucker.

Move in. Everybody move in now.

Move.

Mr. Hanson is my father. It's Rex.

Mr. Rex, are you home?

My company will assume all future product development...

My mom died when I was 4, and, um...

My performance? What about yours? You were so in the moment.

My sex addiction? My sex addiction is, um...

My white whale.

N to the O, brother.

Neat.

Nice.

Nice. Let's go.

Nick, I want you to smile more. You know? Look at those frown lines.

Nick, Kurt, Dale.

Nick. Nick. Come on.

No matter what you do

No one has to die.

No one is busted in a bad sense of the word.

No one is busted in a bad sense of the word.

No one's going to prison.

No police. Aah!

No sweat. I tacked on another zero.

No, actually, your son's life is our number one priority.

No, Dale.

No, fuck that, man.

No, I can't do that. I can't do that.

No, I don't know about that. That's a lot of blood.

No, I don't mind holding. I just barely even called you right now already.

No, I don't think I'd call the cops. I couldn't take that risk.

No, I said there's nothing you can do.

No, I'm not gonna sleep with you.

No, it's like a fire on fire thing.

No, it's not adultery if you're doing it to save your family. Okay?

No, it's totally on. I sent the ransom note to my dad.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No, no.

No, of course not. Oh, my gosh. I'm sure it was just his first reaction.

No, that was a gift.

No, that's a '93 Civic and she's carrying dry cleaning.

No, that's not... Oh, wait.

No, that's the wrong answer. The right answer is because...

No, that's...

No, the water will set it.

No, you don't need to hit yourself anymore. I think we should just make the call.

No, you got hit right in the square of the fucking chest.

No, you're right. They burned us once already. We're not gonna get burned again.

No.

No. I think he's gonna be psyched the order's done three days early.

No. I think I'll hang out here.

No. Uh, no, you're not. Hang on. Hang on. No.

None of this is like I pictured when we were planning it. Everything was cooler.

Not bi?

Not long enough to trace the call.

Now that fancy jacket and that snappy tie.

Now we're talking.

Now what?

Now, how would I get in touch with you guys?

Now, I came to this country with nothing.

Now, I want every inch covered, but everyone holds a safe distance.

Now, I want you to sashay up to the 4th Street Bridge.

Now, listen, I need you to proceed to the Mandrake Hotel.

Now, look, I respect your Naïveté, uh...

Now, Nick, just tell me something.

Now, that is the kind of cool shit you have to look forward to.

Now, you hush. You don't scare us one bit. We got your boy.

Now, you listen. Y'all gonna have to rassle up...

Oftentimes, ending up just face down.

Oh, boy. If this is safe in here, I'd love to shake this out and share it.

Oh, boy. That song. I can't hear that now. Just put it on vibrate.

Oh, but I'm thirsty.

Oh, Dad, that is a hell of a fucking play.

Oh, do you? That's great. That makes me feel a lot better.

Oh, fuck you, Roz. No one likes you anyway.

Oh, God. That is nice.

Oh, great, yeah.

Oh, he got her to go back.

Oh, my God, Dale, stop.

Oh, my God, you guys. Thank you.

Oh, my God, you guys. Thank you.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Do you know what this looks like?

Oh, my God. Goddamn, that was great. Food for the soul.

Oh, my God. I want that.

Oh, my God. The best.

Oh, no, absolutely.

Oh, okay. Well, I appreciate that. I really do. That's sweet, I guess.

Oh, shit.

Oh, shit.

Oh, shit. Are you kidding?

Oh, shit. Cops.

Oh, shit. Good luck talking to the cops. You have your dad's blood all over... Oh!

Oh, shit. It's a cult. It's a fucking cult.

Oh, shit. Nick got busted.

Oh, shit. Oh, shit. She's probably freaking out. I didn't come home last night.

Oh, shit. So, what phone does he have?

Oh, shit. That's my thing. She's doing my thing.

Oh, this is awesome.

Oh, yeah? Better than wrestling camp?

Oh, yes. Absolutely. I got a plan. Okay, here we go. Um, areas.

Oh, yo, yo, yo. I ain't down with no kid fuckers.

Oh, you can do that on me.

Oh! Oh!

Oh.

Oh. I get it. You're bi.

Oh. Please, it's the least I can do to make amends for my bad behavior.

Oh. That was embarrassing.

Oh. Uh, well, it's a...

Oh. Wow. That's not the worst idea I've ever heard.

Oh. Yes. But, doctor, the keypad logged an earlier entrance.

Okay, good. Go get the doctor because I'm feeling a little...

Okay, great, I'll get ahold of you.