Romy and Michele's High School Reunion (1997) Edit

A 60 foot yacht, an eight seat Windstar...

A Bell Jet Ranger, a Bentley, a personal trainer, a full time chef...

A fun, frisky use of colour.

A live in masseuse and a staff of 24...

Across a moonlit night

Actually, Christie, they've got nice lines...

Actually, I think they're semi interesting.

Ahh ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh Staying alive, staying alive

Ahh ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh Staying alive, staying alive

Ahh ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh Staying alive, staying alive

Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh Staying alive, staying alive

Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh Staying alive, staying alive

Ahh! It's Ramon!

All I ever wanted was for people to think...

All I've had to eat for the past six days are Gummi Bears, jelly beans, and candy corns.

All in all, I'd have to say they're really not bad.

All pretty and petite

All right!

All right. Now, just remember, from this point on...

All the kids just getting out of school

Almost left behind

Almost left behind

Although in my dream, I did know the formula for glue.

Always something there to remind me

Always something there to remind me

And all of the sudden we're out of paper clips!

And all we really need is maybe some, like, better jobs and boyfriends. Right?

And and he's, like, really into it, and the rest is history!

And And in some cultures, maybe cuter.

And And we weren't friends.

And And you know this new kid? Don't even know if he's mine.

And having everybody laugh at you.

And I mean, he was in a wheelchair, but still, it's like it's coming true or something!

And I'll be up there in five minutes.

And I'm a cashier and you're unemployed?

And I'm sick of it, you know?

And it blows up in my face.

And it turns out, I was right.

And just have fun like we always do.

And look at the way we live. I mean, just our lifestyle.

And now that he knows that you like him, he doesn't want to pretend with me any more.

And phoney glasses, and carrying briefcases.

And she always, like, devalues me.

And the current is going, like, you know, some... other miles...

And the whole time you were making my life hell...

And then after it cools you mix in a, um, epoxide.

And then we said, Okay, Danny. If you want to be between us...

And think of you

And Travis McKinney is in his fifth year...

And until you told me that our lives weren't good enough...

And we could get on with the world

And we don't give a flying fuck what you think.

And we have, like, this big, like, presentation...

And we need to show up in a really cool car.

And what are you picking on us for anyway?

And when the box arrived, little Jake looks up at me and says...

And would very much like to speak with her.

And you also get a five percent employee discount...

And you know what, it doesn't even matter...

And you're a successful real estate developer.

And, how long does it take him to get to town?

And, uh, please don't tell me to fuck off...

And, uh, to me, fashion is just, it's like...

And, um, Romy is already inside.

And, yeah.

And...

Another kiss is what it takes

Anything you see here we can do, by the way. Get ready to have some fun, okay?

Are you a big TV news anchorwoman now?

As a fashion editor for Vogue magazine.

As a member of the Dallas Cowboys football team.

As of Tucson, we're finished.

As they are about those hideous clothes.

Aww, poor thing. Look! They won't let her shop.

Because I think it would make a really interesting article for the Roundup.

Because it really hurts my feelings.

Because she's selfish...

Because unlike a certain ball busting, dried up career woman I might mention...

Besides, Billy always wanted a big family.

Billy Christianson and Christie Masters!

Billy, honey...

Billy?

Billy. Damn it. Damn it!

Billy's in real estate development.

Blood and roses Blood and roses

Boy, I must have, like, every single issue of Vogue...

Boy, there's a lot of questions to answer. Why do we have to fill these out?

Brain dead redneck asshole!

But but nobody really knows who invented it.

But come here.

But how in the world did you think of Post lts?

But I mean, like, we were, like, really, really old.

But I really think that we should lose some weight.

But I was so miserable in high school...

But if we're not married by the time we're 30, ask me again.

But it is actually kind of sad.

But no matter how much I accumulate...

But then I thought maybe just maybe you could raise the viscosity...

But there's something in the air

But they're walking in time

But you can't read

But you know what I finally realized?

But you know what? We weren't really in the B group, either.

But you really picked a good one.

But you're married.

But you're so dreamy.

But, okay. If those things were so easy to get, wouldn't we already have them?

By adding a complex glucose derivative during the emulsification process.

By the way, that blouse Hi. That blouse looks great on you.

Can I ask you something?

Can I borrow your car?

Can I tell you the truth?

Can't get enough You know you're going to have to face it

Caught up in circles

Christie Masters stuck magnets on your back.

Christie Masters, Kelly Possenger...

Christie, in the yearbook you said that you wanted Jane Pauley's job.

Come on, Michele, let's just go dance with ourselves.

Come on, Ramon. Quit jerking off and bring the car around.

Confusion is nothing new

Confusion is nothing new

Could believe, do, and share in what was true, Oh, I said

Despite that surly demeanour, I think we've just given her a big gift.

Did you hear her report in Miss Weigatt's class?

Discover me, Ramon! Just discover me.

Discover me, Ramon! Just discover me.

Don't forget, you have detention after school today.

Don't get me wrong

Don't get me wrong

Don't get me wrong

Don't get me wrong

Don't we, girls?

Don't you think I know exactly where I stand

Duh.

During this century, boys.

Each and every appendage from your body, starting with your dick, capisce?

Eeewww!

Ever hear of Lady Fair cigarettes? I invented the quick burning paper.

Everything. It's

Exactly how obscene

Explosions! The earth is moving!

Fall in line Just watching all the feet

Fell like a net

Fine.

Fine. I don't care.

Fine. Okay, just forget it.

Fine. You know, you really shouldn't let people fill out applications...

First you need to thermoset your resin...

Flashback to warm nights

Flashback Warm nights

Footloose, footloose Kick off your Sunday shoes

For a business thing. You know.

For a car?

For almost ten years now.

For any simple, oxygenated adhesive, right?

For us to have our picture taken together?

From high school, to get us in the mood.

From Sagebrush High in Tucson?

Get me another daiquiri.

Give me a chance, I know I could, like, sell the shit out of the stuff.

Go ahead and take your time Boy you got to feel secure

Go for it Groove ahead

Go!

God, Billy looks cute in his tux.

God, I feel like I've been, like...

God, I wish I had your discipline.

God, remember the prom? You got so thin by then.

God, that was so rude. I mean, you couldn't help it if you had scoliosis.

God, they really look like executives, don't they?

God, this underwear is totally riding up my butt crack.

God, this underwear is totally riding up my butt crack.

God, what a bitch.

God, you guys are easy to talk to.

God! You want to be honest?

God. I hope some cute guys get here tonight. They were cute last night.

Hang around till quarter after twelve

Have a Romy and Michele day.

Have you been terribly unhappy with me all these years?

Have, like, known us since elementary school.

He could barely contain his erection every time she was around.

He dissects crayfish, but he has a really good personality.

He invented some kind of special rubber or something.

He's the kind of man that I desire

Heather Mooney?

Heather Mooney? Oh, my God, you're exactly the same.

Heather, um, has anyone ever told you that smoking can kill you?

Heather! Can't you be a little bit more sensitive?

Heather? Oh, I'm off duty.

Here you go. You are so bad.

Hey

Hey, everybody, Sandy Frink just landed in a helicopter!

Hey, hey, there's a woman in the world that you can't use

Hey, how you guys doing tonight?

Hey, how you guys doing?

Hey, if anybody needs to make a call...

Hey, look what else I got us, little lady.

Hey, remember that time I barfed from bad Mexican food? It was so gross.

Hey, that's okay. It was better this way anyway.

Hey, uh Explosions. The earth is moving.

Hi, Billy.

Hi, everybody.

Hi, Michele. Gee, Michele, you're looking really lovely today.

Hi, Romy. How are you?

Hi.

Hi. Hey, um, great suit. Is that an Armani?

Hi. My name is Romy, and I'm an alcoholic.

Honey, go on up there and get your medal.

Honey, that is beautiful.

How about that room?

How weird. I didn't even know we were voting.

Huh? I don't believe it.

I am sorry that I blew your big lie for you.

I am, like, really familiar with the entire Versace line, and if you would just...

I bet he would. I mean, it's senior prom.

I can't believe it. There are absolutely no guys here tonight.

I can't believe we never thought of what to say we did for a living.

I can't compete with that. You made Sandy crazy.

I can't do the little things I hold so dear

I can't hear what you've said

I can't stand that we're mad at each other.

I cannot believe he's with Christie Masters.

I cannot believe how busy we've been.

I couldn't figure it out. Okay.

I did not have a thing. I did not have a thing. I did not have a thing.

I don't care if you like us 'cause we don't like you.

I don't have you, Michele.

I don't know. He is sick!

I don't think I can.

I don't think I spoke more than two words the entire time.

I don't think we have anything for you. You're obviously in the wrong place.

I fall behind

I fall behind

I got a bad case of loving you

I got to get something.

I guess I am successful.

I guess I deserve that. I was a jerk.

I have been asked to formally welcome you all...

I have boxes of Kleenex in my limo.

I have to go now.

I hear the clock tick and think of you

I hope your babies look like monkeys.

I I'd like to go away.

I invented Post Its.

I invented Post Its.

I invented Post Its.

I invented the quick burning paper.

I just couldn't breathe there, you know?

I just haven't had time, you know, what with running my own business and all.

I just think that you're more believable as a designer...

I just thought maybe she'd be married to Sandy by now.

I just wish everybody inside the reunion would come out and see us lift off.

I know I'm supposed to wait in that line, but listen.

I know!

I know! And then we turned the sprinklers on him!

I know. And what a bitch, taking your hamburger. I mean, what was that?

I know. Hey, maybe we can pay back Sandy this week.

I know. None.

I know. She is, like, so transparent.

I know. Why don't we say that we own our own company?

I let you have the ideas!

I love The Music Man.

I mean, how am I going to impress anyone by selling Ban Lon smocks at Bargain Mart?

I mean, I try, for once, to be honest with you...

I mean, I'm sure Michele would have told me if she got one.

I mean, it just sounds like you invented Post lts all by yourself, you know.

I mean, l I never would have recognized you in a million years.

I mean, Michele and I just fell out of touch about two hours ago.

I mean, there are at least 12 other major markets that would put me on the air tomorrow.

I mean, we always had so much fun together.

I mean, we never really had a good enough reason, like going to a reunion, to motivate us.

I mean, who's going to know? They're in Tucson, we're here.

I mean, yeah, okay, so Michele and I did make up some lame story.

I never knew that we weren't that great in high school.

I owe this one to Romy.

I said to go fuck themselves, for making my teen years a living hell?

I see neon lights

I shouldn't have said that you weren't smart enough to invent Post lts.

I think maybe we were more like loners.

I think she heard me.

I think we should go back out there as ourselves...

I think you are, like, the funnest person I know.

I thought everything since high school was a blast.

I thought high school was a blast.

I was very much in love with him.

I was wondering if you could sign my yearbook.

I wonder why we didn't get an invitation.

I wonder, if I had gotten my brace off sooner, if somebody would have invited me.

I wouldn't even be here if this weren't, like, a dating emergency.

I'd like a million of you all to myself

I'm Christie Masters Christianson.

I'm exposed and it's no big surprise

I'm flattered.

I'm going as fast as I can, Ms Mooney. Heather.

I'm just a girl in the world

I'm only off to wander

I'm sick of this. I'm going to go weigh myself.

I'm sick of this. I'm going to go weigh myself.

I'm sorry too.

I'm the You're a pasty hag on a deathbed.

I'm the Mary and you're the Rhoda.

I'm the Mary!

I'm the Mary.

I'm the Mary. Everybody knows.

I've been looking all over for you.

I've got a phone.

I've just been lonely with no one to talk to.

If I'm looking kind of dazzled

If there ain't no love then there ain't no use

If you can make us the clothes...

If you don't want them to actually try to get a job here.

If you fall I will catch you

If you fall, I will catch you I'll be waiting

If you fall, I will catch you I'll be waiting

If you fuck with me in any way, I will rip...

If you're lost you can look and you will find me

If you're lost, you can look and you will find me

If you're lost, you can look and you will find me

If you're lost, you can look and you will find me

If, to you, success means having a house in Aspen...

In a freakish, off putting sort of way. Never mind.

In our entire graduating class.

In the service department hand jobs.

Is that an earthquake? No, it's Ramon!

It might just be fantastic

It was like, who cares? Who wants to go to town with a guy who drives a rowboat?

It was long ago

It was so cute.

It wasn't even a whole chip.

It's a tie. It's a tie.

It's beautiful. Is that real wood?

It's ironic, isn't it? I really thought you guys had it made in high school.

It's like, boo hoo. Uhh.

It's me, Michele. Sandy.

It's time to announce the king and queen of the prom.

It's unbelievable. They're as deluded about their lives...

It's very expensive.

It's, like, common knowledge, Romy. Everybody thinks so.

Just because now I know how you really feel about me.

Just forget it. I'm not going.

Keep telling yourself that.

Kids got the beat Yeah, kids got the beat

Let me have the tag, please.

Let me make it up to you.

Let me take care of this.

Let's do it.

Like I give a shit. I look like an asshole.

Like, I thought of them, but you thought of making them yellow.

Like, there's a guy in a rowboat going X miles...

Lisa Luder and Cheryl Quick.

Lisa, give me the bag.

Look, I got money to spend in here.

Look, I j just w wanted to talk.

Looking at your medal from the reunion again, dear?

Lying in my bed

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick

Mama, I ain't that kind of guy

Man stallion, fill me with your giant love wand!

May I take that for you, sir?

Me? Me? Me be more sensitive?

Michele and I have this high school reunion to go to...

Michele made them.

Michele, I think maybe we should leave.

Michele, since this is the last night of school and all...

Michele, you do have magnets on your back!

Michele!

Michele! Oh, Michele. Over here!

Michele? Christie Masters is coming over here.

Michele.

Michele.

Michele. You will never guess who I just ran into.

Michele...

Might as well face it You're addicted to love

Mm.

Mm. It's good.

Mm. Never mind.

Mommy, is that the baby?

My God, you you look fantastic.

My life was perfect and you've ruined it.

My My My driver didn't see you.

My present to myself was a new face.

Nah. It's no fun unless you really love the person.

No pill's going to cure my ill

No wonder you couldn't find us boyfriends, Romy.

No, Billy. Wait. I want to have some fun.

No, no, no. You leave me alone.

No, not at all.

No, not you. No. I was trying to scare your little boy.

No, Romy.

No, thanks.

No, this is so weird. I didn't know you were living in L.A.

No, we're just being honest.

No, you can stay.

No.

No. All the guys with good jobs must be going to some other club.

No. I'm a weather girl.

No. No one. Thank you.

No. No.

No. Uh uh. Why should I be pissed at you?

No. Um

Nobody's going to say no to anyone tonight.

Not at all. I feel very fulfilled.

Not my rival

Not until you admit...

Now we are going to enjoy ourselves whether you like it or not.

Now, you laugh at me. Come on, do it.

Of exactly how you concocted this miracle glue, would you?

Of telling people that they look really good, even though I'm just, like, you know

Oh I've had it up to here

Oh, am I making myself clear

Oh, Billy, gosh, you're so slimy.

Oh, Billy, honey, is your mommy home?

Oh, don't let them see you get upset. That's what they want.

Oh, everybody!

Oh, excuse me, excuse me. You you can't go in without a name tag.

Oh, forget it. I'm not going to have sex with you just to borrow your stupid car!

Oh, God, don't look now. It's Heather Mooney.

Oh, God, you are so weird.

Oh, God! Are you all right?

Oh, God! I've been killing myself for eight days and I gained a pound.

Oh, God.

Oh, good.

Oh, I know. I was so lucky, getting mono. That was, like, the best diet ever.

Oh, I thought they looked familiar.

Oh, I'm just a girl

Oh, I'm just a girl living in captivity

Oh, I'm sorry. No.

Oh, it's the back brace girl.

Oh, my God, do you remember what a big controversy it was...

Oh, my God, I knew this would happen.

Oh, my God, listen to that sad, sad music as she leaves.

Oh, my God, somebody's puking in the bushes.

Oh, my God! I'm so glad you didn't bring your big notebook with you.

Oh, my God! I've got it! Post lts!

Oh, my God! It is perfect!

Oh, my God! Oh!

Oh, my God! You did it!

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Are my lips that big?

Oh, my God. Didn't he die?

Oh, my God. Heather Mooney is here?

Oh, my God. I'm talking cuteness wise, Romy, okay?

Oh, my God. Is that Heather?

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, no, I don't even watch TV any more.

Oh, no, no, I'm I'm Billy Junior.

Oh, no. No, Sandy.

Oh, proof? You want proof? Okay, fine.

Oh, the Wells Fargo wagon Is a coming down the street

Oh, they're around here someplace.

Oh, this is going to be so much fun.

Oh, uh Heather, you said you weren't coming.

Oh, uh, no.

Oh, we're really here.

Oh, well, I was, but I haven't been for a really long time.

Oh, yeah, right!

Oh, yeah, well...

Oh, yeah? Well, let's just see. Let's split up and see what happens.

Oh, you know where Dana met her new boyfriend? He's a William Morris agent.

Oh, you know who they say has made a ton of money? Sandy Frink.

Oh, you know, Sandy Frink invented something too.

Oh!

Oh! Come on!

Oh! God, she was so weird.

Oh! Heather! I want to take another picture of you and Sandy for the yearbook and

Oh! Hey, Romy, remember Mrs Chivas' class?

Oh! I want to interview you too...

Oh! Showbiz! Good job! Where?

Oh.

Oh. Okay.

Oh. Unh.

Oh. Which one of these guys...

Oh. You're kidding me.

Ohh, Ramon! Ohh, Ramon!

Ohh, Toby! Fuck off.

Ohh!

Ohh! Oh, staff.

Ohh! Oh, yes.

Ohh! Ohh!

Ohh! Ohh! Ohh, Ramon!

Okay, cowboy, I don't know what your trip is...

Okay, good! Let's be honest!

Okay, guys, let's jump.

Okay, I didn't understand with your big accent.

Okay, I don't even know what you're talking about because of those words...

Okay, I mean, to give someone...

Okay, I say I say Okay

Okay, I'm not just saying this...

Okay, I'm sorry I said all those things.

Okay, Romy.

Okay, smile! Great! Thanks a lot!

Okay, so who always gets asked to dance first when we go to clubs, huh?

Okay, Toby. Fuck off.

Okay, we're we're working in this advertising agency after college.

Okay, well, come on. I'll help you go find him.

Okay, well, it was very nice talking with you.

Okay, well, what street would that be on?

Okay, you know, so we could say that...

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. But can I take a picture of you first?

Okay. Can I have the rest of this?

Okay. Good.

Okay. I don't think that, like, one chip makes a difference.

Okay. I have the yuckiest taste in my mouth from those taquitos.

Okay. See you in Biology.

Okay. So we're just going to have to make ourselves more impressive, that's all.

Okay. Who can name the capitals of all the 50 states?

On the highest rated 5:00 news in Tucson.

One in Acapulco, a penthouse in New York, a mansion in Malibu...

Only if Romy can dance with us.

Only she's, like, a big giant girl...

Ooh, baby, do you know what that's worth

Ooh, better walk on by Better walk on through

Ooh, better walk on by Better walk on through

Ooh, excuse me.

Ooh, good. Like what?

Ooh, heaven is a place on earth

Ooh, heaven is a place on earth

Ooh, heaven is a place on earth

Ooh, if there ain't no love then there ain't no use

Ooh! Casey Degan!

Our cutoff is 25. Try VH 1.

Our lives don't seem as impressive as I thought.

Our ten year high school reunion in Tucson?

Over and above our everyday low prices.

Oww. Oww. Oww.

Pass this car. This kid is so obnoxious.

Perfect. Okay, Romy, you look so good with blonde hair and black roots.

Please leave.

Plus, I had this really bad stutter.

Post lts must be really lucrative.

Rather than as an inventor, you know?

Right, with extra cherries. Don't move. I'll be right back.

Right. Okay.

Romy and Michele claimed...

Romy and Michele.

Romy White and Michele Weinberger.

Romy White.

Romy! You will not believe what just happened!

Romy?

Sandy Frink has a helicopter?

Sandy, hi.

Saw you standing in the rain

See you!

See, I told you it would pay off...

Seemingly, for no reason they just pass on the street

Seems like yesterday

Service. Number 243.

Sets the summer sun on fire

Settle down. Hi.

She actually thinks she's going to be a TV anchorwoman. What a deludanoid.

She She's on her deathbed.

She was.

She's got it

She's one of our regulars.

So

So I can look at you from inside as well

So I told Prescott...

So I'm going to go out and bag us some boyfriends, while you can look for a cool new job.

So many reasons for me to run and hide

So you must be, like, the most successful person...

So you won't feel so bad that I'm cuter.

So, any boyfriends yet?

So, are we friends again?

So, God! You're driving a new Jaguar?

So, how about you? Any kids?

So, like, it it would just if I laid it on top of that other paper it would just stay...

So, Romy, what group were we in?

So, that means, if we want to burn 4,000 calories...

So, uh, what are you up to?

So, weren't you guys, like, totally in love with me in high school?

So, what are all of you up to?

So, what do you think?

So, what group would you say we were in?

So, what have you been doing since high school?

So, where's the rest of the A group?

So, who would you say was in the B group?

So...

Somewhere where we can talk?

Sorry, ma'am. He is such an asshole.

Suddenly thundershowers everywhere

Sure.

Swear to God. Sometimes I wish I were a lesbian.

Take this pink ribbon off my eyes

Tell your mommy that Michele Weinberger Frink...

Thank you so much for coming.

Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you.

Thanks for not waking me up, Romy.

Thanks for stealing my boyfriend.

Thanks, anyway.

Thanks.

Thanks.

That hurt. But it looked really good.

That maybe he would dance with me?

That we told, like, what, four people some dumb lie.

That we were better than we were in high school.

That we're still single, and we've been living together for ten years...

That, like, has, like, a like a like a paper company or a paper mill...

That's all that you'll let me be

That's crazy! You have absolutely no proof that you're cuter!

That's impossible! Did you deduct 16 pounds for your shoes?

That's ridiculous. You're the Rhoda. You're the ******* one.

That's right, Christie.

That's right. He came over and we're like, Danny, it was a joke.

That's true.

That's what I do. I invented Post lts.

That's when we fall in line

The A group was making your life hell; I didn't know.

The Frink a zoid and Michele, I am sure.

The hell with everyone else.

The hot summer night

The moment that I step outside

The Most Changed for the Better Since High School are...

The rejects; you know, like Sandy Frink and Heather Mooney.

The reunion's less than a week away. I mean, I just can't believe you turned down a job.

The second hand unwinds

Then you say Go slow

Then you say Go slow

Then, yeah...

There was, like, always a word problem.

There's a difference.

There's a difference.

There's still one thing I just don't have.

They don't know where everyone can go

They invented Post lts.

They made them in Home Ec from their own patterns.

They say in heaven love comes first

They say in heaven love comes first

They want to know what we've been doing for the past ten years.

They're ba ack.

They're the little yellow things with the stickum on the back, right?

This dress exacerbates the genetic betrayal that is my legacy.

This is so great.

This is turning out to be one of the very best nights of my entire life.

This ought to be so good.

Those aren't the actual executives, Michele. Those are models.

Those weirdos are staring at us again.

Time after Sometimes you picture me

Time after time

Time after time

Time after time

Time after time

Time after time

Time after time

Time after time

Time after time

Time after time

To make to, like, a client.

To Sagebrush High's ten year reunion.

Tonight I got to cut loose

Tonight.

Tremendous! That's tremendous!

Turning Japanese I think I'm turning Japanese I really think so

Turning Japanese I think I'm turning Japanese I really think so

Two people meet

Two, four, three.

Two, four, three.

Uh E Uh You

Uh huh. And you're not. Bye.

Uh, he's not here. I already asked Toby Dumbfuck. Obviously, I've interrupted.

Uh, it's the moment we've all been waiting for.

Uh, let me just say that, um...

Uh, Michele Weinberger.

Uh...

Um, I think we're about, like, two years away from that.

Um, oh, here it is. Here is your name tag.

Um, okay, so your last job was as a salesgirl?

Um, w

Um... well...

Very much in love, and there's a difference.

W What do you mean, split up?

Wait, I can't find my top.

Walking on your legs, flipping your hair.

Want me to get your huge notebook for you?

Way to go, honey.

We are going to go back there and blow them away.

We are not the ones who got fat.

We are sophisticated, educated, successful career women.

We can go to the reunion, and just pretend to be successful!

We can't get jobs and boyfriends, and lose weight, in two weeks.

We could just show up looking like businesswomen.

We could've really changed her life.

We don't have anything like that.

We got the beat

We had this big falling out over Post lts.

We have come a long way in the past ten years.

We have come all this way.

We have to burn twice as many calories as we eat.

We just waited and waited.

We only did it because we wanted you to treat us like human beings.

We only have to run 20 miles a day!

We studied it in business school.

We want to So just give us a chance

We were still totally cutting edge.

We'll make heaven a place on earth

We're all happily married.

We're just discussing our class success stories. So, what are you up to?

We're pregnant, you half wit.

Well Uh.

Well don't let me out of your sight

Well, at least we looked fantastic, and that is the most important thing.

Well, believe it or not...

Well, do you think you can stop being such a baby?

Well, drive fast!

Well, duh.

Well, duh.

Well, I guess that depends on how you define success.

Well, I just sewed them. We both designed them.

Well, I mean, maybe I'm not.

Well, I mean, we never really tried before.

Well, I've made a lot of money.

Well, it's been really terrific seeing all of you.

Well, no, but it's like most of these people...

Well, nobody invited me either.

Well, not super impressive.

Well, now that you know, will we be getting together a lot?

Well, okay, l l think it should be like something that that everybody has heard about...

Well, say something nice about my penis!

Well, so what? You can't even get a job!

Well, thank you. Unfortunately, we don't have any openings here right now.

Well, the air conditioning is working in the service office.

Well, then I'm sure you wouldn't mind giving us a detailed account...

Well, then why don't you just give us, um, two burgers and fries and Diet Cokes...

Well, then, what's the point of going if we're not going to impress people?

Well, we still think they're ridiculous.

Well, what about this?

Well, when I made my first million...

Well, while you were doing that, I taped all the nostalgic songs...

Well, yeah, but

Well, yeah.

Well, yeah.

Well, you know what? There are worse things than telling some dumb story...

Well, you know, I'm not sure that we were really in any group.

Well! I guess I won't be seeing you at the reunion.

What a waste.

What do I get?

What do you want?

What is your name?

What kind of business you in?

What the hell is your problem, Christie?

What the hell.

What vote?

What? No, I'm sorry. I don't think so.

What? Nuh uh. You look totally cute.

What? Oh, no. Michele, come on. I mean, that was like, all the honour students and like...

What? Yeah, right, Michele. Just the thought of having sex with another woman creeps me out.

When we get to Tucson, we're going our own separate ways.

Where are you?

Where do you even get outfits that hideous?

Which is really just a fancy schmancy name...

Who cares?

Who smokes and says shit a lot.

Whoa ohh ohh

Whoa ohh ohh

Whoa! Oh. Oww.

Why are you always such a nasty bitch?

Why did I even come back here?

Why do you think he always carried that huge notebook?

Why don't you call her?

Why don't you go and get that room?

Why don't you just go back to ignoring me like you did in high school?

Why don't you just let them think for themselves for once?

Will I have sex with at the reunion?

Will you dance with me?

With your cousin Barry. I wouldn't brag about it.

With your long hair and your long legs...

Woke up this morning happy as can be

Won't they know we're not really businesswomen?

Would you care to dance with me once?

Wouldn't it be great if there was, like, this, like, stickum on the back of this paper...

Wow, three kids.

Wow!

Wow! Don't you think?

Wow! Wh Good job!

Wow. Billy Christianson?

Wow. God, the top female executives are all so pretty.

Wow. God, the top female executives are all so pretty.

Wow. Isn't it weird when you're not friends with your friends any more?

Wow. So you did it? You're an anchorwoman?

Yeah, baby she's got it

Yeah, but, uh, she can't come to the phone right now.

Yeah, I did. All right, let's get going.

Yeah, l Well, who did then?

Yeah, like those salesgirls in Beverly Hills aren't bigger whores than she is.

Yeah, Ramon. That'll happen.

Yeah, well, Danny Weller, like, lodged the complaint, and, you know

Yeah, well, my first choice was to work at a boutique on Rodeo Drive, but this would be okay.

Yeah, you should. It'll be fun.

Yeah!

Yeah?

Yeah. Apparently he's worth, like, millions.

Yeah. Enjoy your fashions.

Yeah. For me though, it's like...

Yeah. Hello. Um, we need something to go.

Yeah. I invented Post lts.

Yeah. That's because I'm sweating like a pig in here.

Yes, cara mia?

You are a jerk off!

You are Columbus, and I am America.

You are looking hot today.

You are so much cuter than you were in high school.

You can come to Michele's house on Friday night, and we'll be waiting.

You can either pay me the 150 or I am out of here. Bye bye.

You could make curtains for the motorhome with this.

You know what I want.

You know what, Michele? You're right.

You know what? I bet in high school everybody made somebody's life hell.

You know what? I bet that's not true. You were really unpleasant.

You know, even though I had to wear that stupid back brace, and you were kind of fat...

You know, even though we've watched Pretty Woman like 36 times...

You know, for old times' sake.

You know, I mean, we live in L.A, and they are still stuck in Tucson.

You know? I mean, I had the worst dream, Romy.

You might want to come by and, uh, cool off later?

You miss her, don't you?

You must be the most successful person in our graduating class.

You wait here. I'll prep my chopper.

You want to be my lover Want to be my lover

You want to try and have sex sometime? Just to see if we are?

You were right. I was a brain dead, redneck asshole.

You were, like, the designer.

You're a bad person with an ugly heart...

You're addicted to love You see the signs

You're as cute as me. You are.

You're in deep

You're just jealous...

You're kidding me.

You're kidding me. It's been ten years since high school?

You're obviously pissed at me.

You're running at a different speed

You're so bossy and domineering.

You're the chubby girl.

Your fantasy is going to come true...

Your heart beats in double time

Your own business?

Your own country?

'cause we're in a hurry. Mm. We're due in Tucson later.

A one track mind, you can't be saved Do you want to dance?

Aaah! Come on! Now, we're running out of time.

After all these years, you still take my breath away. Thanks.

Ah! We're having so much fun already. Oh, I know!

Ahh ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh Two four three.

Ahh! And the winners are...

Albuquerque. You can't sleep

And so we meet again. Oh, hi.

and we know that we're not being conceited? Oh, I know.

and we know that we're not being conceited? Oh, I know.

And you'll be mine Hi.

Anyway, are you going? I'd rather put this out in my ass.

Are you ready? Ready.

Are you serious? Mm.

Are you sure you want to do this? Oh, yeah, Michele, I am so sure.

Billy Christianson? Mm hmm.

But I'll tell everyone you said hi. Why don't you tell everyone...

but if this is some kind of a sick game What? No.

Can I take your picture? Oh, please. Hello, girls.

Christie. Uh. Come on, I'm hungry.

Chubbo? The name is Romy.

Clarence. I like your hat, Clarence.

Come on, Michele. Oh, okay, bye.

Come on, Michele. Okay.

Come on! Vote? What vote?

Dance hall days Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

Dance hall, dance hall days Okay, everyone.

Did you lose weight? Actually, I have been trying this new fat free diet I invented.

Did you lose weight? Actually, I have been trying this new fat free diet I invented.

Diddy bum diddy bum pow Here it is

Dig way down in your heart Down in your art

Do you live with Michele Weinberger? Yeah.

Doctor, Doctor, give me the news You look so rich.

Duh. Oh, it's me!

Ecch. She blinded me with Science

Eeew, look at them. We were definitely not in that group.

Eeew. I hope I don't get indigestion.

Everybody cut, everybody cut Everybody cut, everybody cut

Everybody cut, everybody cut Everybody cut, everybody cut

Everybody knows what Post lts are! Yeah!

Everybody, everybody cut footloose Footloose

Fifty fifty. Wow. Yeah.

Fine! Fine.

Footloose Whoo!

God, can you believe we're going home in a helicopter? I know. It's so cool.

God, I cannot believe it's already been ten years. I know.

God, I was such an idiot. But wait till he sees you now.

God! Can you believe he just got married?

God. Now he's going to see what it feels like to wait.

God. Where have I been? I'm stumped. Where?

Good! And so, okay So then l, l, like

Here. Help yourself, Michele. Thanks.

Hey, isn't that Sandy over there now? What did Sandy invent?

Hey, Michele! Romy! We'll take two Diet Cokes?

Hey, Michele? Yeah? What does this remind you of?

Hey, Romy White. Hey.

Hi, Romy! Hey.

Hi. Hi. Hi, Christie.

Hmm! So so so we're, like, brainstorming...

How much is this, Lori? It's very expensive.

Huh! Oh, my God, Michele, that's it!

I can't hear what you've said Okay. Okay.

I can't wait till we move to L.A. Me too!

I carry you, Michele! Without me, you'd be lost! That is such a lie!

I could care less. I am not here with Romy. You're kidding me.

I do love those outfits. Yeah, sure do.

I don't believe it. What?

I got a bad case of loving you I mean, great.

I got this tie for a dollar. You paid a whole dollar for that?

I guess I'm cuter. Yeah!

I hurt your feelings? Yeah, all the time.

I know. Me too. Well then, can't we just, like, think of something?

I love it when it's hamburger day. Uh huh.

I never get tired of making fun of it. Oh, I know.

I think so. Yeah.

I want candy Michele. Billy Christianson.

I want candy Oh, my God.

I want to live, but I don't belong Thank you! Thank you, I really appreciate that...

I want your love But it comes out wrong Thank you.

I'll be waiting I will be waiting

I'll dance with you, Romy. You're calling to me

I'm a suit salesman. Oh, uh oh

I'm in a hurry. Well

I'm in a rush. Ring it up if you must. Okay.

If you fall, I will catch you I'll be waiting I will be waiting

Is Sandy Frink here? Uh, no.

It's about time. Mm. Romy!

It's closer to the truth Could you wait here?

It's like, not even funny. I have to say...

Kick off my Sunday shoes Kick off my Sunday knees?

Let's go. We got to get in there. Okay.

Let's see it, come on! Let's see the outfit. How divine!

Like, how desperate is she? I know, it's like: Hi. This is my husband.

Like, what if we invented something? Like what?

Living with someone? Should I say you?

Loose your blues Watch out, Tucson, here we come! Everybody cut footloose

Me neither. Whoo! Jack, get back

Michele Weinberger? Mm hmm.

Michele? Huh? I was kidding.

Might as well face it Hey, Christie.

Might as well face it W W W What should I do?

Nice outfits. I'm your fire

Nope. Engaged? No.

Now that I'm looking at this... Uh huh?

Oblivion is all you crave I mean, it's just 'cause...

Oh, God. Good evening, sir.

Oh, great. Thanks.

Oh, he's so cute. He is cute. Really cute.

Oh, man! Ohh! Ohh!

Oh, my God! There we are! Yeah, and alone. Look.

Oh, my God. It's a flip phone! Uh huh.

Oh, my God. Michele. Look at the A group. Mm hmm.

Oh, okay. Okay.

Oh, Romy. Oh, please, go away. Just leave me alone.

Oh, they were cute. Really cute! Oh!

Oh, we won't, Mr Lish. Yeah, we're really looking forward to it.

Oh! Okay. Here we go.

Oh. I wish.

Oh. So...

Oh. You know... There she is.

Okay, just get in. Okay.

Okay, thanks. Get off me now. Aw, come on, wh

Okay. All right.

Okay. Dance hall days

Okay. Do you have some sort of businesswoman's special?

Okay. Find us. Oh. Okay.

Okay. Mary Pat, Mary Kate, Mary Frances, Tovah.

Okay. Plus, I hate to say it...

Okay. Tell me can you feel the

Okay. Yeah.

Okay. You know, you're going to have to face it You're addicted to love

Okay. Well, the reunion is still like two weeks away, right? Right.

Okay. Why not? Yeah. So, um, what musical are they doing?

on an XJS convertible and that you're fixing it up. Yeah?

Ooh, college! Good one! Yeah.

Oowhee, Louise I have no idea what the rest of the lyrics are.

Ow! God, that has been bugging me.

Post lts? It's a long story.

Romy White! You're shitting me.

Romy. Oh, dear.

Roses, roses There should be a cigarette you could smoke all the way through between classes.

Sandy Frink? Uh huh.

Sandy Frink? Yes, Sandy Frink.

See you later. Ugh Okay.

See you. W W

She still is. Why was she, like, always going behind that building?

Shit! Aww.

Shit! Aww.

So say you're a freelance fashion consultant. Ooh! Clever.

So, what'd you have to do to get it? I had to give all the guys...

Some kind of rubber. Romy here invented Post lts. You did not.

Some more of that? Yeah.

Somebody to tell you Somebody better tell you

Stay away from my bikini area. Um, okay.

Suitcase of memories You know, maybe he's, like, passed out in the bathroom.

Sure. Why not? Oh, my God!

Thank you. Pick up the pace.

Thanks a lot, Romy. What?

That life ain't passing you by You have one hell of an eye

That was a good one. Thanks.

That you're immune to this stuff Y Y Sure. Why not?

That's okay, you're welcome. I don't think we'll be requiring any new staff.

That's such a good one. Ladies.

The Frink a zoid? Yeah.

The Music Man. You're kidding!

Then I heard you say Got a light?

They don't? Well, do you think it's impressive...

They're obsessed with us. Look at what they're wearing.

This is so cool! Oh, I know.

To Christie. Yeah, but you've got children...

To say you can't get enough I l I'll be right back. Okay.

To whip it, Whip it good Wow. She is really P.O.'d.

Try the bar. Thanks, man.

Uh huh. How's my hair?

Uh huh. Okay.

Uh huh. You're my lover

Uh huh. God, I had the hugest crush on Casey. 'Member? Oh, yeah.

Uh oh. Don't look now. Here come the Frink a zoid. Oh, God! He is such a geek!

Uh, what do you want? Ohh, Romy...

Unemployed. No. Don't write that.

Us? Yes, you.

Watch out, Tucson, here we come! Come on before we crack

We got the beat 'Round and 'round and 'round

We got the beat We got the beat

We got the beat, We got the beat We got the beat

We were cool on craze Oh, gee. Nice outfits. Really.

Well, yeah, but what? I don't know.

What are you doing? Look.

What are you talking about? Billy just broke up with me.

What do you do? Ever hear of Lady Fair cigarettes?

What do you think? I am so sorry.

What? Come on. Get real, Michele. We're idiots.

What? Hello, Romy.

What? She stuck

What? Yeah, I let you have the ideas...

What? You actually think I would do something like that?

What? What? She is out of control.

Where's Michele? I don't know.

Who lost their virginity first? Oh, big wow!

Whoa, you like to think Yeah. I mean

Whoo! We got the beat

Why are you tormenting me? You like to think you're immune to the stuff

Why don't you go fuck a sheep or your sister or yourself? Oh, yeah

Why don't you just leave her alone? Michele.

Wow, we have a whole class full of inventors. Meaning?

Wow. She never comes over. Okay, just act cool.

Yeah, I did. You did not.

Yeah? It's Romy!

Yeah? Todd told me that he gave you a really great deal...

Yeah. From L.A. And you know some places have, like, a lunch special.

Yeah. Let's fold scarves! Okay.

Yes! Ahh!

Yes. Yes, it is. I thought so. So, what do you do?

You are not cuter, Michele. I am so cuter.

You aren't taking on any what? Staff. Employees.

You betcha. Ah!

You can't eat Albany.

You going to the reunion? What reunion?

You got me turning up and turning down Okay, I give up. What are you doing?

You know what, Michele? Huh?

You know what? Huh?

You know, the yellow things with the stickum on the back? Yes, I know what they are.

You know, the yellow things with the stickum on the back? Yes, I know what they are.

You know? Yeah.

You picture me He's not in the bathroom, Michele.

You think? Oh, yeah. God.

You want me to go check? Time after, Sometimes

You wanted it to be believable. Aww.

You You want to talk to me? Yeah.

You're addicted to love That Romy girl just asked me to dance with her.

You're kidding! You must've made a fortune!

You're playing so cool Whoo! Whoo!

You're yearning, burning You're flurning, burning, earning

I mean, what did I do? Well, it was your grandfather or uncle.

Oh, I know. This town is like so unhip. Ecch.

Uh, you can't go in without a name tag. Fuck off!

'Cause I'm just a girl I'd rather not be

'Cause I'm just a girl Well, little old me

'Cause it's all those little things that I fear

'Cause there's a party over here So grab yourself a beer

'Cause they all sit and stare with their eyes

'Cause they won't let me drive late at night

'Cause we got the beat We got the beat

'Cause, alphabetically, he's supposed to be between us.