Secret Life of Pets 2 Edit

A poor, defenseless animal needs saving.

Absolutely not. Never gonna happen.

Advanced spelling. She'll ace it, though.

After the plane landed, I saw Hu again.

Again.

Ah, come on, old man, don't do this.

Ah, come on.

Ah, very good.

Ah...

All hail Queen Gidget.

All hail the queen.

All right, all right, all right, all right.

All right, all right.

All right, doggy.

All right, just don't panic.

All right, let's get this show on the tracks.

All right, let's hide him in the...

All right, we're here.

All right, well, I got to go.

All right.

ALL: Huzzah!

Am I a hero?

And and it explains a lot,

And eventually, he started crawling.

And from this point on, nothing is gonna be the same.

And happy! (laughs)

And henceforth will be known as...

And I feel like a good dog,

And I get out, and I've gone nowhere.

And I want him to see the world.

And I want you to know I have got this.

And I will chase it because my brain

And I'll come back and check on you in a bit, okay?

And I'm gonna help Liam be brave.

And I'm never gonna let anything bad happen to him.

And if you don't, that one...

And Liam, he's just thinking ahead.

And loving...

And maybe you'll learn something.

And on fire! (screams)

And suddenly, my own home wasn't safe anymore.

And tail in the face.

And thank you!

And the good news...

And the next, you get to go in a car!

And then there's this one.

And they just gonna give up. (grunts)

And we were going through our owners' stuff.

And we're in a relationship and this is our baby. (chuckles)

And who let this super cool cowboy in the car?

And why do we hide them?

And you have two choices:

ANNOUNCER (on TV): La Pasión de la Pasión.

Anybody comes in here looking for trouble,

Anybody hungry?

Anyway, I heard Katie say we're leaving tomorrow, and...

Are my babies hungry?

Are they clean or dirty?

Are you crying?

Are you finished?

Are you okay?

Are you scared?

As I was saying...

As one of those pee pee kids.

As soon as he left the building. Over.

At first, he slept all the time.

At the door until you come back!

Attention.

Aw.

Awesome! Wow!

Ba Back inside.

Bad dog. Bad cat dog.

Because he's my kid,

Because I don't want to... Ow!

Being in this weird place.

Body blow.

Boo Boo.

Book, book, book.

BOTH: Boom.

BOTH: Mm...

BOTH: We start fires.

Bring it.

Buckle up, everyone.

But but every pet knows, if you pee on it, you own it.

But get this I'm going on a trip.

But I don't have a behavioral disorder.

But I got to say, keeping Liam safe is a full time job.

But I I think Liam wants me near him.

But I like to protect Liam from... everything.

But I never chewed a cord again.

But I saved that tiger anyway.

But it it's a... it's a dangerous world.

But my leg is stuck.

But nice meeting you, uh... What was it again?

But then, one day,

But we don't have anywhere else to take him.

But what if, deep down, I'm a bad dog?

But you know what? Liam is smart, too.

But, uh, Liam just left.

Bye bye, Mama and Dada.

Bye, Rooster!

Bye, Snowball. Bye, Mr. Bear.

Can you do that?

Can't control his bladder?

Captain Snowball is on the ca... (yelps)

Captain Snowball, you're in charge while I'm gone.

Cats don't care about fetching. Fetching is for dopes.

Cats eat birds. It's nature.

CATS: Hail the queen!

Chloe, I'm going on a trip, and I Oh.

CHLOE: Okay, tail.

Chloe?

Chloe.

Chloe...

Chuck is really he's a good guy.

CHUCK: Let's get this guy inside.

Circus wolves?

Coffee on computer.

Come on, jump!

Come on, kid. Deeper. Deep from your gut.

Come on, let's go.

Come on, Max. Let's go explore.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on.

Come with me.

Commander Horsey, please read the minutes

Concentrated circus evil.

Cool. Now turn me into a chinchilla.

Copy that.

Correct a rooney.

Cotton, where are you?

COTTON: Ow! Whoa!

Cotton's close. (grunts)

DAISY: And then I heard a noise.

DAISY: He was being brought to his new owner.

DAISY: Our humans were safely stowed

Daisy! Hu!

Death blow!

Did you poop in a shoe?

Dinner's on!

Do any of you know Captain Snowball?

Do I look like a chicken to you?

Do not let tiger out of your sight.

Do you want to join me?

Dog's got two things in this life:

Don't worry, I'm I'm fine.

Don't you worry.

Don't you... don't you ignore me.

Dreaming about, you know,

Duh. That's what I've been talking about wolves.

Duke, what did I do? What did I do?

DUKE: Hey, Max.

DUKE: Maybe a break from the city is just what you need.

Ears up.

Ears.

Engaging plan B.

Enjoying what looks to be a cookie shaped like a moose.

Everything is great...

Everything's cool.

Fetch.

Find a way to get back up here, or is there...?

First mission in the bag.

First of all, I want to welcome White Thunder back

For shame!

From our last meeting.

From the washing machine,

Get away! Get off me!

Get back in there! Come on.

Get back in your pen, Cotton.

Get me out of here. I'm stuck.

Get that tiger out of here before he does any more damage.

Gidget, are you home?

Gidget, no. That's...

Gidget, what have you done?

Gidget, you look so much like a cat, it's crazy.

Gidget, you're as close to a cat as a dog can get.

GIDGET: Mm.

Gidget?

Gidget.

Go ahead, Princess.

Go away! (yells)

Go get Cotton.

Gonna try and find my inner Rooster.

Good bye, now. So long.

Good doggy.

Good morning, New York City!

Good morning, Snowball.

Good to be home.

Grateful I'm not being piled on by a horde of children.

Guard white tiger.

Guys, I found treats!

Guys, what's your location?

Ha ha!

Ha!

Ha! Flawless victory.

Ha! Take that!

Ha! Tiny Dog, you so naive.

Had to worry about any of that, but then one day...

Hallelujah.

Hang on, Max.

He can really tell a story.

He doesn't need preschool.

He he likes to run.

He learns not to do it again.

He specializes in behavioral disorders.

He was a scared, adorable tiger cub named Hu.

He, uh... he got the jump on me.

He'll, you know... (grunts)

He's perfect.

Heck yeah!

Heck yes, it does. Always keep 'em guessing.

Hello, citizens.

Help!

Here we go. I'm gonna get you. (grunts)

Hey, big fella.

Hey, cow. Moo.

Hey, guys, we're here.

Hey, hey, hey. We don't have time for this.

Hey, kid. Good job today.

Hey, look. That big guy got out.

Hey, man, what is going on?

Hey, man.

Hey, Maxie.

Hey, mister.

Hey, Pops.

Hey, quick question: Is he still peeing everywhere?

Hey, Tiny Dog.

Hey, what's that kid doing in the cage?

Hey!

Hey! Get me out of here!

Hey.

Hey.

Hey. Step away from the tiger.

Hey. What's going on?

Hip, hip, hip,

His name's Liam.

His water bowl and his dignity.

Hmm?

Hmm. Say, who is that?

Hold on. It's gonna take more

Holy cheese and crackers! What is that?

How you been?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh? (roars)

Huh? Snowball?

Hurry up, Hu.

Hurry up!

Hurry up!

Hurry.

Hyah!

I am a hero. I need you to respect that.

I am not a fan of the farm.

I am not. I'm I'm... Tell him, Duke.

I can do this.

I can handle it.

I couldn't see him because of the cone.

I don't see him. Over.

I give wolves one job.

I got it. I got it.

I got to be honest with you.

I got to get it back, but to do that...

I got to get the dude to get the stuff to do the things.

I got to make a poop.

I got to... Bye bye.

I had eyes on the package

I have never smelled before.

I hear one of you needs my help.

I I I can't do that.

I I I mean... I I mean, I worry a little, sure,

I I... I can think of, um...

I know a guy whose owner is never home.

I know. He wasn't cool at all.

I know. It's my favorite toy in the whole world.

I landed on my feet.

I lost Busy Bee.

I love the car!

I love you, Max.

I mean, as long as we pointing fingers.

I mean, mostly.

I mean, you know, I I bring her a dead bird, she throws it out.

I meant... (yells) That's cool.

I pooped in a boot.

I run, and I run, and I run, and I run,

I swear, I... (gasps)

I think he moved a little.

I think he'll be okay.

I think we should check on Liam.

I walked backwards for a week,

I was scared.

I was teaching Tiny how not to be anyone's sucker.

I was wondering if you'd...

I was wondering, could you watch my Busy Bee

I will defend Busy Bee with my life.

I wonder what other sounds I could make.

I, uh... I I didn't know this was your bowl.

I'll be right back.

I'll trade you two socks for a pair of workout shorts.

I'm a go get back to my pizza rolls,

I'm calling this meeting

I'm Captain Snowball.

I'm doing superhero stuff.

I'm fine.

I'm good either way.

I'm good.

I'm I'm... I'm having a moment.

I'm just telling you what happened.

I'm just... That sounds great,

I'm looking for crime, Tiny Dog.

I'm not even sure what glutes are, but...

I'm not so nervous around the farm or you or...

I'm not... don't know what you're ta...

I'm skin and bones. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no...

I'm talking about Paw and Order.

I'm talking about this kid.

I'm telling you, once the humans bring a kid home,

I'm the little dog right there,

I'm too afraid.

I'm wagging my tail like an idiot.

I've had enough.

In fact, I heard Katie say

In record time, too, thanks to the Bunnymobile.

In the overhead compartment,

In the tristate area is scratching at my door.

Is acting like you're not afraid.

Is he's staying with you.

Is nothing I do good enough for you, Mother?!

Is the size of a rat turd.

It changes you.

It is great, Gidget.

It it's just, Max trusted me

It it's too high, and and I'm I'm...

It opens a cat lady's window.

It shocked me.

It sounds like you bragging.

It was easy.

It's a reindeer.

It's exactly like that. Exactly.

It's got my name on the side.

It's it's like we're his parents.

It's just until we can get

It's like a humming sound. (purrs)

It's like you're the dad and I'm the mom

It's like... it's like a tiny... like a tiny motor.

It's me, Daisy, from the plane.

It's my human that's nuts.

It's not... Okay, yes.

It's okay, Hu.

It's Snow time, baby.

It's, uh, no big deal no need to overreact

Just jump.

KATIE: Come on, buddy.

KATIE: Hey, Duke.

KATIE: No, I'll do the dishes.

KATIE: No. No, no, no.

KATIE: Thanks.

Keep it together, boy.

Kid seems fine to me.

Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty!

L L Let's talk about this like rational... (grunts)

Let me know when you finish tooting your horn,

Let me tell you something.

Let me tell you something.

Let's go!

Let's go. (sighs)

Let's hide Hu on the roof.

Liam did something I never expected.

LIAM: And this one is a jumper.

LIAM: Bubbles!

LIAM: Wha...? Ooh.

Like the clumsy oafs they are.

Like, as in the sound is coming from inside of me?

Like, multiple cords?

Like, what can I say? The the kid's a fan.

Listen, I heard Chuck tell Liam that we're going on a trip.

Look at that thing I'm not scared of right there.

Look at this place.

MAN (on TV): Maria, your face,

MAN (on TV): Take that, evildoer.

Man, you know, life is funny.

MAX (chuckling): Yeah, we have fun.

Max is coming down to save you.

Max, come on. Try to catch a firefly.

Max, did you see that?

Max, here's a trick.

Max, you go, have a great time,

MAX: Ah, kids.

MAX: Always.

MAX: And by the way, I'm still not a kid person.

MAX: And look at that

MAX: And we help him out whenever we can.

MAX: Because everything changes.

MAX: But I'm gonna be brave.

MAX: Duke and I, we became like role models to him.

MAX: He had his place...

MAX: Katie and Chuck had a kid of their own.

MAX: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. (screams)

MAX: Nothing stays the same for long.

MAX: Now, I thought I never

MAX: Oh, I miss New York.

MAX: Oh, man.

MAX: Okay, so things got back to normal.

MAX: Snowball.

MAX: The minute you're used to something,

MAX: Until he started talking.

MAX: We try to be a good influence.

MAX: You know what they say:

MAX: You never know what life is gonna throw at you.

Max?

Max.

Max.

Max. Max. You're never gonna believe it.

Maxie, come on, boy.

Maybe I should make juggling monkey

Maybe it was.

Me and Tiny Dog need backup.

Meanwhile, cats land on their feet.

Mind your business, turkey.

Mine are gonna be shredded.

Mm hmm. That was weird.

Mm, okay.

Mm. Oh, hi, Max.

Mm...

Mm...

MOLLY'S DAD: Come on, Molly, time to go.

Morning, Snowball.

Move it!

Move. Hyah!

Mwah.

Mwah.

My doggies.

My God!

My name is Daisy, and I really got to talk to him.

My name's Tiny.

My nose is so confused.

My owner always says, "You're such a good dog,"

My owner might have given me a little bit of catnip.

Myron has hidden socks all over the room.

Myron, horn!

Nah, man, it ain't fun.

Name's not Chicken.

Never mind.

New dog, tell me your story.

No offense. Or do take offense.

No one asked anything.

No one got eaten. The end.

No, he wasn't.

No, I mean I literally don't believe a word of it.

No, I'm not even trying to brag.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No, no, no. No, no, look, look. It's okay.

No, no, please, you don't want to eat me.

No, no. Baby bird is staying put.

No, what are you... Don't get attached.

No! No, I'm not.

No.

No.

No. No, no, no need for that.

No. No, no, no, no, no.

No...!

Nobody cares!

Nope! Thank you, Rooster.

Norman, now!

NORMAN: Homebase, this is Eagle Eye.

NORMAN: No, wait.

NORMAN: You got it, sister.

Not a fan.

Not in any way. No.

Not knowing where one sock is messes with the humans' minds.

Nothing. Why are you hanging out

Now go and do the front. No, no, back.

Now go to the side.

Now it's over.

Now the daily pledge.

Now you're talking.

Now, go fetch the sheep.

Now, go find those socks.

Now, I did my best to keep a safe distance.

Now, I don't speak wild animal...

Now, remember, everyone, crime is out there.

Now, this is training.

Now, what do we do with human socks?

Nowhere!

Of the Superhero Animal Friends to order.

Oh, and and ready?

Oh, are you gonna throw a ball? Oh, please throw a ball.

Oh, boy.

Oh, boy.

Oh, boy.

Oh, dear, sweet Busy Bee.

Oh, dear.

Oh, Dr. Francis is the best veterinarian in the business.

Oh, gonna die, gonna die, gonna die!

Oh, good.

Oh, he went into the woods.

Oh, hello, Snowball.

Oh, hey, I like your cone.

Oh, hey, Max. Were you saying something?

Oh, hey, what, uh...

Oh, I feel like that's very specific to you, but totally.

Oh, I just... I just love him immediately.

Oh, I know this! It's a ball.

Oh, I'll bet you're right.

Oh, I'm a dog.

Oh, it's not that big a deal.

Oh, no, no, no, no!

Oh, no, no, no. Of course not. I'm just freaking her out.

Oh, no, they gonna kill us, Hu.

Oh, no! Oh, no!

Oh, not cool. You tricked me.

Oh, now you've done it.

Oh, Pickles.

Oh, pretty little dog, I like you.

Oh, sister, it's gonna get way weirder.

Oh, Snowball.

Oh, so he got really high up in this hypothetical tree?

Oh, thank goodness.

Oh, that guy. Yeah.

Oh, that is sweet. She...

Oh, that's cool. That's a lot of head.

Oh, they gonna meet my partners.

Oh, this is bad. (sobs)

Oh, this is good.

Oh, uh, fun fact:

Oh, uh... (screams)

Oh, wow. I love him.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, you know what, I really wish I could,

Oh, you know, just because.

Oh, you know, just returning your giant tiger.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh! (screams)

Oh! I got it.

Oh! Looks like her grandma.

Oh.

Oh. Chloe, you're purring.

Oh. Great.

Oh. Hello.

Oh. Oh, it's just this weird little guy.

Oh. Oh, okay.

Oh. There he is!

Oh. Uh, yeah.

Oh. You know where to do that. Find a shoe.

Oh... (groans) Okay.

Okay, come on, Gidget.

Okay, Cotton, listen, we got to... (yells)

Okay, fine. One night.

Okay, Gidget, eat Sweetpea.

Okay, I'm a go check the perimeter.

Okay, moment's over.

Okay, now, Pop's quiz.

Okay, okay, look... Huh?

Okay, okay, okay.

Okay, pig, you asked for this.

Okay, sure.

Okay, there's your cubby. Right over there.

Okay, this is it.

Okay, touch the butt to the cup.

Okay, you don't listen.

Okay? Keeping my reflexes sharp.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. (hums a tune)

Okay. Hey, Pops.

Okay. I I'm Max, and this is...

Okay. Keep Wait a minute.

Okay. Okay.

Okay. Thanks, Norman.

Okay. Well, it all began

Okay. What's next?

Om, nom, nom.

One good look at my glutes... (exhales)

One minute, you're getting fitted for a cone,

One.

Oof. Yeah, we are.

Ooh, I'm gonna be late for school.

Ooh, me, me.

Ooh, my pizza rolls.

Ooh, that's me.

Ooh! (giggles)

Or... (yells)

Or... (yells) There's a candy wrapper on the ground.

Ow, ow, ow! (screams)

Ow, ow!

Pickles is pissed.

Pink Thunder.

Please, can the tiger stay with us?

Please?

Point me in the direction of any animal

POPS (military cadence): ♪ I'm a puppy cute and sweet ♪

POPS: Oh, flap doodle.

Problem solved.

Professor Pops?

Psst. Duke.

Puffy Dog?

PUPPIES: Aw.

Puppy school is in session.

Puppy school?

Real quick why is there a lampshade on your head?

Really? (chuckles) That sounds drastic, but...

Really? How do they... (screams)

Really? We're going in the car?

Right in the garbage!

Right?

Right. O Okay, got it.

Rooster, you you know what? Just... just go on without me.

ROOSTER: And then he assumed the old lady's identity.

ROOSTER: Okay, moment's over.

Run from it...

Say good bye, monkey!

Scent's getting stronger.

Scratching again there, buddy.

See, that's the thing about being awesome.

See? It's just a thing I do.

Sergei have new toy.

SERGEI: Pathetic. Let's go!

SERGEI: Puny little coward.

SERGEI: Stop!

SERGEI: We don't have entire night.

She brought the food over to...

She is the Chosen One.

Skipping through the forest with...

Snowball, I'm back.

Snowball, the fuse!

SNOWBALL: ♪ Panda ♪

SNOWBALL: Come on.

SNOWBALL: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Snowball!

Snowball!

Snowball!

So good. (sighs)

So let him run.

So long, suckers!

So then your kid's up a tree. What's the problem?

So there I was, surrounded by nasty wolves.

So you have to do this.

So, are you scared?

So, Grandma had a pet wolf.

So, how did it go? What what happened?

So, uh, did your kid leave for school yet?

Some situations at you, and you're just gonna, you know...

Sorry. Uh, I'm I'm just... I'm... (sighs)

Sounds like a plan.

Stay home with with me, where it's safe.

Stealth mode.

Stop ah!

Stop digging for a second, Boo Boo,

Sub By Black Hawk

Sub By Black Hawk

Subject is safe and sound,

Superbunny powers, activate.

Sure, you can.

Take that, Mr. Wolfy. (blows raspberries)

Tell him, Rooster.

Ten hut!

Th There was a tiny monster taking it over.

Than fake ears and a sock, okay?

Thank you.

Thanks, Gidget. See you later.

That Liam's head circumference is in the 80th percentile.

That sounds really smart.

That story happened, and it gets worse.

That thing is out.

That tiger needs Captain Snowball.

That tree can't support my weight.

That wolf was gonna eat the little girl.

That your owner is just playing superhero, right?

That's a good kitty.

That's a good kitty.

That's great. Um, listen.

That's how confident she is.

That's me, by the way. I'm Max.

That's not for me to say.

That's not how the story goes.

That's, uh... that's fascinating.

The baby bird is leaving the nest, TD.

The big, scary, incredible world.

The first step of not being afraid

The minute you think, "Oh, this is how life is,"

The package has left the building.

The turkey who won't stop following me!

The vet? No! No, no, no, no, no!

The way of the cat.

There something wrong with him? He got the fever?

There we go, buddy.

There you go.

There.

There.

There's a little girl in a red hood,

There's apples in this tree.

There's Uncle Shep.

They ain't clean.

They are in a truck.

They had a great visit. The little girl went home.

They never tell the dog specifics.

They're on a train headed northbound.

Things seemed like they were gonna be fine.

Think of this as a... as a... as a game of fetch.

This beautiful creature is Hu.

This ends here and now.

This is Captain Snowball.

This is important.

This is just you and me.

This is my kid.

This is urgent. Over.

This poor baby kitty was being held against his will.

This scratching thing under control, okay?

This thing ate a flat screen like it was a pita chip.

Thwip, thwip, thwip, thwip, thwip. (laughs)

Tiny Dog, where are you going?

Tiny Dog!

Tiny Dog.

To look after his Busy Bee, and then...

Too easy? Maybe.

Train him before preschool starts.

Training is going to be a lot more fun.

Ugh. Can you believe that?

Uh huh. Okay, well, you do know

Uh oh.

Uh, all right. Yeah, of course.

Uh, Chloe?

Uh, hey, Rooster.

Uh, hey. Uh, hello.

Uh, is he okay?

Uh, Max, Rooster nips at the cows to get 'em to move.

Uh, so you'll watch Busy Bee while I'm gone?

Uh, that was a bad guy, right?

Uh, that's that's Liam.

Uh, we don't... we don't want any trouble.

Uh, what? What are you talking about?

Uh, yeah. Okay. Cool.

Uh, yeah. Yeah, well, there's a few...

Uh...

Uh...

Uh... (chuckles) Thanks.

Uh... are you sure that's my tiger?

Uh... yeah.

Um, I'm sorry, Liam. We can't read.

Um, pardon me. Offense is very much taken.

Wait a minute. Where's Cotton?

Wait out here, buddy.