Spider-Man: No Way Home Edit

A 17 year old high school delinquent...

A blizzard blasted through.

A boy was entrusted to you,

A brilliant scientist.

A disturbance near a military research facility

A monster flying through the air.

A place that represents second chances.

A scientist that turned into a tree.

A second chance.

A torture rack.

About last week's attack in London.

About May.

About which we know frighteningly little.

About you and your friends not getting into college,

About your purple alien that loves stones.

Actually, that was Sasha so...

After everything we've been through,

After he tried to kill me.

After you left, I detected an otherworldly presence.

Agents wanna know exactly what was taken...

Ah, hey, here he is.

Ah, I got no time for Peter Parker stuff, you know?

Ah, so we go along or die. Not much of a choice, is it?

Ah, you've outdone yourself, Peter.

Aka Peter Parker,

Aka the web headed war criminal

ALARM: Alarm system deactivated.

All right, guys, focus up. You feel that?

All right, MJ, heads up!

All right, tell me again. I'm sorry, I'm an idiot.

All this time, people looked up to this boy

All we gotta do is focus, trust your tingle

All we have to do is figure out how to get there.

Although I do need to show this letter to my parents.

An anonymous source provided this video.

An ID with me, you know?

An interdimensional warrior

And a couple of years later, you, Doc Ock,

And act like I ain't butt ass naked?

And all that power back there...

And as his legal guardian, essentially his mother,

And called him a hero.

And coordinate our attacks.

And don't call me "sir."

And helped him get to space.

And I don't mean just in the cosmos. I mean in his mind.

And I don't... Doesn't make sense.

And I get these tinglings in my hands...

And I know you're on your way to the airport.

And I respect it.

And I thought he could help me.

And I'll explain everything.

And I'll pull the plug. All right, let's go!

And I'm gonna talk to them about you.

And I'm still broke.

And I'm the dumbest person because I let them help me,

And if that spell gets loose, they're all coming here.

And if the school sees me fighting these crazy monsters...

And if those people are watching...

And if you keep your noses clean,

And it was perfect.

And it'll be like none of this ever happened. Okay?

And it's all my fault.

And it's very difficult and dangerous

And matter displacement.

And once I finish the proper ritual,

And protestors.

And send these guys back to their universes.

And so it begins.

And some frozen burritos in a microwave?

And tell us who he really is,

And that is a lizard, and we should go!

And the longer you do that, the more dangerous it becomes.

And then send them home.

And then what? We perish?

And then, uh...

And then... Oh, shit.

And there he goes.

And they shot an episode of The Equalizer here in the '80s.

And they've done nothing wrong.

And try and fix some of this damage

And try to kill you.

And we can confirm at least one person has been killed...

And we, the innocents,

And we're gonna get through it together.

And when we get into MIT,

And where is "here," exactly?

And who will, no doubt, go down in history

And with great power,

And witnesses say that they saw

And yet here we are, outside.

And you don't know me, but you...

And you might not die fighting Spider Man.

And you wonder, "Is all that gone too?"

And you're willing to commute to another universe...

And, um, honestly, right now we're all he really has left.

And...

Any more than you could change who they are.

Any more while I'm casting it.

Are left to pick up the pieces.

Are they all like this?

Are you excited for MIT?

Are you getting the tingle thing?

Are you gonna go into battle dressed as a cool youth pastor,

Are you okay?

Are you okay?

Are you okay?

Are you seriously still talking about college?

Are you Spider Man's girlfriend?

As of now, you have detected zero multiversal trespassers,

As the greatest superhero of all time.

As we bring you up close and personal coverage

Ask him. He can explain everything.

ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: And we're out.

At any given moment, but I didn't.

At least they used a good picture.

At Oscorp when I worked there.

At the Midtown School of Science...

Attaboy.

Back to being a nobody.

Back up. Back up. Back up!

Back where they came from.

Badass.

Basically everyone that knew

Basically, what I'm trying to...

Be a fresh start. And we'll all be together.

Be careful what you wish for, Parker.

Because I blipped for five years.

Because I need to talk to someone.

Because I'm Peter Parker? So cast a new spell.

Because my nana says that we have it in our family,

Because Norman Osborn died years ago.

Because only a coward conceals his identity.

Because someone forgot to cast a monthly maintenance spell

Because that's not who he is.

Because that's what they do. All right?

Because the answer can incriminate me...

Because then everyone that was in my life

Because you remember what they stood for

Been thinking about it a long time.

Before he fell into... a pool of electric eels.

Before you asked me to brainwash the entire world?

Before you do anything, Mister...

Believe me, the world is watching.

Believe me. I'm so sorry

BETTY [BROADCASTING]: We're covering the first day of senior year

Between known and unknown reality.

Between supporters of Spider Man

BOSS: Jones, what are you doing? Get back to work.

BOTH: Don't say anything without a lawyer.

BOTH: Thank you.

BOTH: Whoa.

Brace yourselves. You might wanna sit down.

Brainstorm ideas.

Brilliant scientist. Military research.

Bring them here while I figure out

BRITISH REPORTER: Authorities just a short while ago confirmed

But at least this way, you get to go home and have a chance.

But at some point, I just... I stopped pulling my punches.

But don't ever do that again.

But even if I wanted to...

But he was greedy, misguided.

But he's not gonna send anyone home

But I can't do this if you're in danger.

But I carried on, tried to, um...

But I don't think I'm gonna make it off this bridge.

But I never meant for any of this to happen.

But I was wondering if...

But I'll let you live.

But I'm gonna need help.

But I've been trying to find your friend

But if I didn't, millions would've died,

But if they rejected you and you tried

But if this goes sideways...

But if we match up our backup schools,

But if you look here... the chip is fried.

But if you stay here,

But if you were involved...

But it'll be okay.

But keep an eye on the lights. When they're all green,

But my Aunt May should really know.

But now everybody knows and...

But now you die.

But that's not all, folks.

But the fact remains, Spider Man is a menace.

But the others...

But then yesterday, I was...

But things will get much worse.

But this has to end. Now.

But this isn't your universe.

But this time, make everyone forget who Peter Parker is.

But what if that doesn't work? What if that doesn't work?

But what if we could? What if we could change their fate?

But you actually encouraged it.

But you can't take the chair out of the guy.

But you gotta understand, that would mean that everyone

But you have to go home now.

But you're not him.

But, ma'am, this isn't about me.

But, you know, not doing it this way.

By getting involved with a vigilante like Peter Parker?

Bye.

Can I tell you something, though?

Can we just stay up here all day?

Can we rewind it back to the "I'm lame" part?

Can we talk about this in the kitchen?

Can you imagine if we both got in? And Ned?

Can you not throw the bread again?

Can you please explain to me what is going on?

Can't you just cast the spell again?

Catch.

CHANCELLOR: Peter! Help!

Chaos and calamity ensue?

Check it out.

Child endangerment's a nasty rap.

College admissions.

Come hell or high water.

Come on, come on, come on. Okay, I'm so sorry.

Come on, isn't that worth trying?

Come on, kid, let me see your face.

Come on, pick up, pick up.

Come on, Strange, have a heart.

Come on, Wong.

Come on, you can still make your flight.

Come on! Come on, this way. Quick, quick, quick!

Come on.

Comes great responsibility.

Connors?

Continue to contend that the vile vigilante is a hero.

Could you just stop talking?

Crawl around.

Created by living organisms, and then, uh...

Cure that ass.

Cure. Cure some ass.

Damn.

Dead. They both died,

Deal.

Department of Damage Control.

Devastating attack in London have emerged.

Did you get a makeover?

Did you guys see that?

Did you just open a portal?

Did you not hear me say, "Don't lose him?"

Did you really think that I'd let that happen?

Did you see that?

Did you send in your applications yet?

Different Peter. Weird.

DILLON: Another universe?

DILLON: I got my body back.

DILLON: It's just a tree, man. Just a tree.

DISPATCHER: Four three Edward, do you need an EMS assist?

Do it.

Do you remember the full moon party at Kamar Taj?

Do you think there are other Ned Leedses?

Doc?

Doc?

Doc?

Doctor Strange, sir, Peter's plan is working.

Doctor...?

Does any part of you feel relieved about all of this?

Does it just come out of your wrists,

Don't make me a murderer, Peter.

Don't mention it.

Don't wanna be killed,

Don't worry, ma'am! I'm coming!

Don't, because he will just make me clean it.

Don't.

Door's... Hey!

Doughnut for my fellow Engineer.

Dr. Connors?

Dr. Curt Connors. He was a scientist

Dr. Octavius, no.

Dr. Otto Octavius.

Drowned in the river with your machine.

Dude, half my guys are guys in the chair.

Dude, I'm so sorry about that.

Dude, what? I'm busy.

Dude!

Dude!

Dude!

Dude!

Easy, buddy.

EDITH: Are you sure you want to commence the drone attack?

Either of you.

ELECTRO: Sad to tell you, Sandman,

ELECTRO: What's up, Peter?

Empire State.

Enough attitude. Just do it.

Especially by a guy dressed like Dungeons & Dragons,

Especially by a teenager using scraps

Even after she was hurt,

Ever since I got bit by that spider...

Ever since I got here.

Everybody get off the bridge!

Everyone in the world's gonna forget you're Spider Man

Everyone that she helped...

Everything Spider Man touches comes to ruin.

Exactly. Unless...

Exactly. You would know.

Except your girlfriend.

Excited to see you tomorrow.

Existential crisis stuff.

Expect disappointment and you will never get disappointed.

Facial recognition unavailable.

Fascinating.

Federal agents? You stay here.

Feel free to walk or swing through the hallway.

Feel like I'm gonna puke.

Felt like this.

Fighting Spider Man.

Find Peter Parker!

Find Peter Parker.

Find Peter Parker.

Fine.

Fine.

First one's here!

Five years?

Fix? You mean like a dog?

FLASH: ♪ No sleep till ♪

Flint, we're trying to help you!

FLINT: I can't hold him much longer.

For a month.

For five years.

For me, it was the top of the Chrysler Building.

For Midtown High's most famous student,

For more, we go now to Joint Intelligence headquarters.

For the brutal murder of Mysterio,

For them? Or for yourself?

Fresh from his rampage in Queens.

Fresh start.

Fresh water it is.

Fresh water or salt?

From a bachelor's junk drawer.

From Daily Bugle Supplements.

From every universe into this one.

From none other than the fugitive known as Spider Man,

Gave his room to May so he's sleeping down here.

Get away from everything?

Get in here, guys. Let's go.

Get it off of me.

Get off, get off, get off me.

Get out of the car now! Move!

Give me that back.

Glasses and a comb over.

Go get them, tiger.

Go to the right! Right! Right! He means right.

GOBLIN: Can the Spider Man come out to play?

GOBLIN: Coward. We have a new world to conquer.

GOBLIN: It didn't work.

GOBLIN: She was there because of you.

Goddamn eels.

Gods don't have to choose.

Good luck.

Good night, and God help us all.

Good.

Got it! Close it.

Gotta be careful where you fall.

Gotta cure all of them. Right?

Governments around the world launch investigations

Great, it's just some random guy.

Green Goblin, impaled by the glider you flew around on.

Gross!

Guys, comm check. Hello?

Guys, I'm at the top.

Ha ha, you are the one that killed her.

HAPPY: I should probably leave.

HAPPY: If you wanna go over it again. I mean... What's that sound?

HAPPY: Wrap it up.

Hasn't he been through enough?

Have you been listening this whole time?

He died in my arms...

He does.

He got it from you, that pathetic sickness.

He had a tin suit and he could fly, right?

He has an army of drones, Stark technology.

He hit me. Spider Man hit me!

He just wandered in.

He sounds jolly. Start with him.

He used to work with Tony Stark, but then he was...

He was like a flying green elf.

He will. He's very good at forgetting things.

He'll tell you. And then he caused an overload.

He's a conspiracy theorist.

He's about to destroy another national landmark.

He's gonna kill us all.

He's my best friend

He's saying he's gonna be the new Iron Man. No one else.

He's standing right there. He's not...

He's the wizard I told you about.

He's with his aunt and some guy.

Heh heh, that's a good question.

Heh, you okay?

Hello, Peter.

Hello.

Here we go.

Here. Get out of the way. Let me get that man.

Here's the real blockbuster.

Hey, ask him if this is,

Hey, I told you, I don't need fixing.

Hey, Max, I missed you, man. Ho!

Hey, Strange.

Hey, um...

Hey, wait, wait! Whoa!

Hey, you can't just...

Hey, you okay?

Hey!

Hey! Who the hell are these two?

Hey! You! I see you. Come here!

Hey.

Hey.

Hey.

Hey. He trusts you. So do I.

Hey. Hey, hey, hey.

Hey. Hey!

Hey. Uh, I think this is it.

Hey. What are, like, some of the craziest villains

Hi, my name is Peter Parker,

Hi?

Hi? Do we...? Do I know you?

Hi.

Hi. Heh.

Hi. Hi.

Hi. My name is Peter Parker. You don't know me, but I, uh...

Hi. Um, my name is Peter Parker, and I...

Hiding from who you truly are.

Hiding in the shadows.

Hm.

Hmm.

How are you?

How can I help?

How did you do that?

How did you just do that?

How do we stop him?

How do we...? How do we...?

How to get them back before

How you like the new new?

How'd you end up like that anyway?

How'd you know her?

I accessed my doorbell camera.

I accidentally brought those dangerous people here.

I also didn't know that you could talk.

I am a glass half full kind of gal.

I am going to talk to them about your friends and you.

I am so sorry...

I am the most famous person in the entire world.

I called Damage Control. They're on their way.

I can explain everything. Trust me.

I can feel it. That weird energy.

I can help you. You know, I'm something of a scientist myself.

I can still hear her voice in my head.

I can't believe I'm in the Sanctum Sanctorum.

I can't promise you guys anything,

I could be so much more.

I could do that?

I could say under advisement of counsel,

I could've been more fun.

I couldn't do any of this without you, so thank you.

I couldn't save her.

I did.

I didn't kill Quentin Beck. The drones did, okay?

I didn't know where else to go.

I don't believe any of the charges

I don't care anymore.

I don't have the Time Stone anymore.

I don't know how many visitors we've got...

I don't know how to say this.

I don't know how to work as a team.

I don't know if this would actually work,

I don't know what you're talking about. What machine?

I don't know, it kind of feels different

I don't know.

I don't know. I just feel like, if you don't...

I don't know. Looks like he's charging.

I don't like this. Just web him.

I don't need fixing.

I don't need your help. I got it just fine.

I don't think I could go through that again.

I don't think we should skinny dip.

I don't trust anyone.

I don't trust you. I don't know you.

I don't wanna brag, but I will.

I fell into a vat of electric eels.

I generally don't go around advertising it.

I genuinely don't know how you do this without throwing up.

I got bitter.

I got eyes on him.

I got it, I got it!

I got it. I did it. Uh, will you send him up?

I got rageful.

I got some understanding of what it is you're...

I got their letter. I assumed that was...

I got what I wanted.

I gotta go. Where am I going?

I guess it's just not in the cards for guys like us.

I guess you keep doing it until we find the real one.

I had him by the throat, and then I...

I hate the woods.

I have a daughter, and I want to see her.

I have a weird question. Um...

I have it all under control.

I have the tingle thing, just not for bread.

I hope you have time to check it out.

I hope you understand...

I hunted down the man who I thought did it.

I I knew way before MJ did.

I just came through this, uh...

I just don't want you

I just feel so dumb. I didn't realize you were miserable.

I just finished my MIT one.

I just have this sense that...

I just thought you was gonna be Black.

I just wanna kill you myself.

I just wanna talk to you about your relationship, okay?

I just wanna... I want you to... I wanna tell you that...

I just wish we could see him.

I just wish we could see him.

I just wish we could see Peter.

I keep yelling at you, Peter 2!

I kind of expect disappointment.

I kind of like who I am here.

I knew it.

I know a couple of magic words myself,

I know about those.

I know it.

I know that's what you think. Calm down.

I know this is my mess, and I swear to you I'll fix it,

I know what you did.

I know you will.

I know, I get it, but we can't just send them home to die.

I know, I know, I know. I, uh... Um... Uh...

I know, I know. We suck.

I know.

I know.

I like it.

I literally helped him find the Vulture.

I lost a good friend a while back.

I lost Gwen, my, um...

I lost...

I love people. I love them so much.

I love you guys.

I love you.

I love your relentless optimism.

I made mistakes, and people were hurt.

I may have struck the blow, but you...

I mean, I could have killed you...

I mean, I'm happy to rehash it if you want to.

I mean, like the dumber version of me

I mean, this is really hurting a lot of people.

I mean, this is so not fair. I didn't do anything wrong.

I mean, you can take the guy out of the chair,

I mean, you don't have to come.

I meant the universe, sir.

I need a lawyer because I'm...? I thought he was...

I need the cure!

I need you to capture them,

I promise I'll fix this.

I promise, I won't turn into a supervillain

I promise, I've got this all under control.

I pursued it into the sewers, where I found that...

I really hate magic.

I really like how you're a people person.

I refuse to answer the question respectfully

I refuse.

I saw another one on the bridge.

I saw how she trapped you, fighting her holy moral mission.

I saw Spider Man in an ad for this place.

I should have let Strange send them back.

I should see what that is.

I think I broke my ribs.

I think I can help you guys.

I think I can make an anti serum for Dr. Osborn.

I think that I can repair the devices for Dillon and Marko,

I think the Mets are gonna

I thought it was the MIT lady you saved.

I thought that was the tanning bed Happy broke.

I thought you guys were such a handsome couple.

I thought you were in love, May.

I told you I never wanted to do this ever again!

I told you there'd be consequences.

I trapped your corrupted spell inside,

I underestimated you.

I understand your loyalty to Mr. Stark and his legacy,

I wanna kill him.

I wanna see Peter right now.

I wanna tear him apart.

I want a taste of that new energy I just felt.

I want incriminating footage of Spider Man.

I wanted him dead.

I was about to turn into pure energy, and then...

I was in the Avengers.

I was just here.

I was Spider Man before should still know!

I was Spider Man's "guy in the chair."

I was stuck in the grid, absorbing data.

I was swinging through the city, and then I went through

I would like to have my words stricken from the record.

I wouldn't change a thing I did.

I, uh...

I... I wish I could tell you, but it's, like, I don't do it.

I... I've seen you two...

I'd almost forgotten.

I'd rather not talk about this.

I'll come find you, okay?

I'll come pick you up when it's done.

I'll explain, but first, can you help me?

I'll make you remember me.

I'll save myself.

I'll see you around.

I'll see you inside, okay?

I'll see you later.

I'll tell you what I call him, public enemy number one!

I'll, uh, see you around.

I'm a really good lawyer.

I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm coming.

I'm done.

I'm gonna come back in a second to check,

I'm gonna fry you from the inside out.

I'm gonna lead him inside the statue.

I'm gonna press it.

I'm gonna talk to Admissions about your friends.

I'm grateful, dear boy. Truly.

I'm in control, buddy,

I'm lame compared... I fought a Russian guy

I'm never gonna be able to forgive myself for that.

I'm not giving you the... Whoa!

I'm not here to talk about Westview.

I'm not really sure why I'm explaining electricity to you.

I'm not supposed to say anything to you.

I'm okay.

I'm Peter Parker's best friend.

I'm Peter, but I'm not your Peter.

I'm ready.

I'm really sorry if I wasted your time.

I'm really sorry that I dragged you into this.

I'm right here. I'm right here.

I'm right here. We're gonna take our time.

I'm risking a lot just talking to you.

I'm so sorry. Are you okay?

I'm so, so, so sorry. I love you.

I'm someone else.

I'm sorry about that, sir. I mean...

I'm sorry, kid.

I'm sorry, Stephen.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. Are you telling me

I'm still, like, that you fought an alien in space.

I'm trying to get Ned and MJ a second chance at getting in.

I'm very aware of your tactics and my rights.

I'm, uh...

I'm...

I've been dangling over the Grand Canyon for 12 hours.

I've done it before, I can do it again.

I've never seen him this powerful.

I've only had one week where my life has felt normal.

I've seen your file.

I've watched you from deep behind Norman's cowardly eyes.

If I can fix what happened to you, then when you go back,

If I don't hear from you, I'm pressing the button.

If I have nothing to hide?

If it's personal, I don't wanna pry, but I think it's cool.

If something bad happens, you just push this,

If they die, if you kill them...

If they die, they die.

If you don't, I'll just figure it out.

If you expect disappointment,

If you wanna read about our inspiring friendship,

In a rhinoceros machine.

In the grand calculus of the multiverse,

In the palm of your hand.

Include the male spider's ability to hypnotize females,

Into missing Stark technology.

Into the murderer known as Spider Man,

Is all this for a holiday party?

Is lure these guys someplace, right?

Is she even gonna be my girlfriend?

Is that him?

Is the tingle happening? Is your tingle tingling?

Is there anything else?

Is you.

It can analyze, design, construct basically anything.

It can't be him.

It didn't make it better.

It doesn't really hurt anymore.

It hurts 'cause they're gone and then it hurts all over again

It is so crazy down there.

It means the electricity in your body's dissipated.

It shows Quentin Beck, aka Mysterio,

It started pulling in everyone

It took me a long time...

It was all over the news.

It was heartbreaking.

It was my fault.

It was the next step in human evolution.

It was your spell that got screwed up,

It worked. That totally worked.

It would appear a few of them squeaked through.

It would be as though you never existed.

It'll reverse the spell

It'll work. Have faith.

It's a fabricator.

It's a hassle compared to what you got.

It's actually my fault that you're here.

It's an ancient relic. The Macchina di Kadavus.

It's an honor to serve you, sir.

It's choking you. Can't you feel it?

It's fine. You'll do it again. We'll keep trying.

It's gone.

It's good to see you.

It's gotta be the guy I saw on the bridge, right?

It's in Goodfellas. What's the thing they say in Goodfellas?

It's isolated, so no one should get hurt.

It's just a standard spell of forgetting.

It's just me and you, okay?

It's just me and you.

It's just that we can't do that,

It's just tons of...

It's kind of stiff from all the swinging, I guess.

It's literally the dungeon of a wizard.

It's me.

It's not about me.

It's not my problem.

It's not my responsibility, May.

It's not.

It's okay, Flint.

It's okay. I'm gonna come and find you,

It's okay. It's a backup school.

It's okay. Uh, these are my new friends.

It's okay. Um...

It's okay. We're okay, right?

It's okay. You guys are good. You're safe. Get out.

It's one of my favorite things about you.

It's the arc reactor.

It's their fate.

It's too dangerous.

It's you trying to live two different lives.

J. Jonah Jameson reporting.

JAMESON: ...place is about to be swarming with cops.

JAMESON: It's been a few weeks since the fiasco

JAMESON: Ladies and gentlemen,

JAMESON: Spider Menace!

JAMESON: The Statue of Liberty? Good God, folks.

JAMESON: There you have it, folks. Conclusive proof

JAMESON: Tragedy.

Jones. I told you to take down the Halloween decorations.

Just answer my questions.

Just have to...

Just know that I really did try to help you.

Just leave me out of this.

Just me.