Don't Look Up Edit

A cell phone picture of her private parts.

A comet between five to ten kilometers across,

A comet, bigger than the asteroid that destroyed the dinosaurs,

A direct hit of Earth in six months and 14 days.

A man's always got choices, Randall!

A Michigan State professor and his grad students...

A portion of the profits goes to the manatee sanctuaries.

A simple gesture that created so much.

A source also confirmed to me that

A spoonful of Xanax makes the medicine go down, right?

A therapy session with a nearby professional,

A very large comet.

About five to ten kilometers wide.

About that singer Riley Bina and DJ Chello breaking up.

About the approaching comet.

About your past relationship with Kate Dibiasky.

According to the most recent spectrometer readings of Comet Dibiasky,

Actually contains at least $32 trillion of these critical materials.

After all of the information you've received today,

All due respect, Madam President...

All have to pitch in and push out this message.

All of my life's work,

All right, DJ Chello.

All right, well, what Farley says goes.

All right. So, Randall, we're hearing that there is no comet,

All these multitudes of problems

All those proud white folks working hard.

Almost $140 trillion worth of assets.

Alone.

Am I to understand correctly that,

An extinction level event?

An unprecedented comet, nine kilometers wide,

And 23%, they don't think there's a comet at all,

And according to NASA's computers,

And admit that mistakes were made."

And as recently as yesterday...

And cars, um, and clothes and shit

And clicks overall were below basic weather and traffic stories.

And cryo chambers were 58% successful,

And cue the package.

And developed lighter skin so as to not get...

And do you know why they want you to look up?

And Dr. Mindy is a tenured professor of astronomy at Michigan State,

And exploit it for profit. It cannot be done!

And full disclosure. I bought as many shares as I could.

And God and I thank you.

And going out on a limb,

And has been peer reviewed by hundreds of world renowned scientists.

And he almost fell out of his chair.

And he's calling me a crackpot. [chuckles]

And humanity is gonna stride through the Pillars of Boaz and Jachin naked

And I commend that, um,

And I don't know what's going on.

And I feel a connection to you on a level that...

And I feel horrible.

And I hate them, but I found my own way to it.

And I just said, "You know what, I'm gonna smoke whenever I want to."

And I still can't make sense of it.

And I swear to God, he farted right in front of me.

And I think we're all gonna die!

And I'll reach out to more of the scientific community on the down low.

And I'm sure many of the people out there

And if we can't all agree at the bare minimum

And incendiary language relating to Comet Dibiasky and BASH Cellular."

And is this nanotech work peer reviewed?

And it's roughly five to ten kilometers wide.

And just look up into the sky.

And just watching this, it just made me think of it,

And Lisa Inez from Princeton on their team.

And make it so we can all have a home is going to work, right?

And my Vroom Vroom Army have been so amazing.

And none of that matters.

And now approaching Comet Dibiasky and are ready for attachment mode.

And now the Herald has egg on its face.

And now they're actually firing scientists like me

And now, please welcome Sir Peter Isherwell.

And now, uh, there's Riley Bina with her special guest.

And PhD candidate Miss Kate Dibiasky are here.

And sacrifice on display here.

And scan it with nanotechnology

And special thanks should also go to this team of scientists behind me...

And that number is way up.

And that will enable NASA and our great military

And that will give us the distance between the comet and planet Earth.

And that's everything.

And the average astrometric uncertainty of 0.04 arcseconds, we then asked...

And the early word is it's already a classic, Brie.

And the person in charge.

And the president really said to sit tight?

And the reason we know that there is a comet

And the thing is, he actually pulled it off. [chuckles]

And then determined that this comet, hurtling towards us from deep space,

And then Dr. Mindy and Miss Dibiasky,

And then we immediately deploy, don't we?

And think of you.

And thinking about home.

And to support, uh, BASH LiiF, uh, I wanna officially announce...

And unsettling.

And using Gauss's method of orbital determination

And virtue signaling. Just get along.

And we are a go for the BEAD launch.

And we are fully prepared to mobilize

And we have Kate Dibiasky, who the comet is named after,

And we know that there is a comet because we have the data.

And we put our tails between our legs. It is just so boring.

And we thank you for your courage and your service.

And we're all supposed to do whatever they say?

And we're not gonna tell the press about it ahead of time

And we're supposed to trust you? The comet's got your name.

And what do you suggest we do? An online petition, huh?

And when these treasures from heaven are claimed,

And when these... Thank you.

And who knows? Maybe, just maybe, one of our scientists...

And with that,

And wrongly convicted murderer, Michelle Weems,

And yes, you can tell from my smile...

And you and I will review the NASA plans.

And you know, now all those years of work have come to fruition with BASH LiiF,

And you might find that your questions are answered.

And you put one foot in front of the other,

And you're not approaching this mission like a businessman.

And, get this.

And, uh, for America's sexiest scientist, a bottle of goddamn Cialis!

And, uh, South Korea has expressed...

And, uh, was this professor the one who first made the observations?

And, um...

And, um...

And... And no, PhD candidate Kate Dibiasky found it.

Anyway, I am Dr. Mindy. This is...

Apparently for asking too many questions about this mission here.

Approximately 36 hours ago,

Are fast becoming those that are deployed

Are just gonna become relics of the past

Are sociopaths and fascists!

Are we really about to tell the president of the United States

Are you at all concerned about the sync on the BEAD explosions?

Are you being serious?

Are you Dr. Randall Mindy?

Are you sure the video of the puppy on the rooster

Aren't even gonna listen to what I just said

As always.

As such, you need to attend an emergency Cabinet meeting

As, uh... As some of you may know,

Astronomer Dr. Randall Mindy

At 62 miles due west off the coast of Chile.

Attach themselves to the comet

BASH got Orlean to pay the Chilean government, if I'm correct,

BASH News just sent me eight push notifications.

BEADs have approached optimal escape velocity

Because China has her big panda paw firmly on almost all the mines

Because I think, as a country, we need to stop arguing

Because that way it will have the appearance

Because they are looking down their noses at you.

Because, you know, photographs of me smoking

Benedict Drask reporting for duty.

Both kinds.

Brie and Jack have legendary chemistry.

Brie, I've got something for you today. Listen to this.

Brie, your wife, your call.

Business?

But 30 smaller meteoroids, we can handle.

But anyway, that doesn't matter.

But don't blame her.

But I also wanna give a prayer for stuff.

But I can assure you, our best and our brightest, they're on the job.

But I didn't want... I mean, you told me that he was clean.

But I don't see any articles about our thing.

But I got away from it by getting three masters degrees.

But I haven't seen a pin like that.

But I... assure you,

But I'm not gonna lie to you.

But if there is one thing,

But it isn't potentially going to happen.

But it's all math.

But it's not even close to 70%.

But much more importantly than that, I know what you are. I know who you are.

But not the ones that check you in and they're not the masseuses,

But sure, in the vastness of space, why not?

But then they cut me for time.

But there's a New York Herald story that's just come out that talks about...

But they never called us in. I couldn't believe it.

But they walk you down the corridor.

But they've got Gary Talcamont from Stanford

But this is all quite credible.

But this is obviously much bigger than my misgivings.

But we are seeing some awfully strange orbital numbers

But we didn't do it. I don't know why we didn't do it.

But we're gonna need a hero.

But what's emerging now is a scandal...

But would you want to spend more time together?

But you have to understand, this is now beyond our control.

But you just run towards pleasure and away from pain.

But, look, it's always been you.

But, uh, first,

But, uh... approximately 40 minutes ago,

But, um, maybe we should say "amen"? Should we do that?

But, unfortunately, there was an immediate backlash

Bye, Peter.

Call Diogo, he'll freak out. Will you say hi to my friend?

Call it 70% and let's just move on.

Can come back anytime, but the yelling lady, not so much.

Can I ask you one thing before we go any further? I have to know this.

Can I get a photo of you for my portfolio?

Can I sit down with your mom to have lunch in, like, seven months?

Can I touch your hair in a non sexual way?

Can it destroy someone's house? Is that possible?

Can we just call it a potentially significant event?

Can we make that happen?

Can you not say "why not"? It makes me feel like you don't want it.

Can't stand Orlean, either.

Can't...

Chell.

Citizens of planet Earth,

Citizens of planet Earth. Now...

Citizens of the United States and peoples of the world,

Clean sweep for President Orlean in these midterm elections.

Come on, man. What the hell? This is real world.

Come on, motherfuckers, let's light this fucking firecracker, huh?

Come on.

Come on.

Commander Drask, this is your president speaking.

Commence simultaneous explosive separation stage now.

Correct, Scott?

Critical to technology.

Dearest Father and Almighty Creator...

Details of your call may be shared with other subsidiaries

Developed by Nobel Prize winning scientist,

Didn't break eye contact and didn't even say "excuse me."

Divest from BASH when?

Do we keep having a wonderful time or does he go back with you to Wisconsin?

Do you have an issue with my mom? Is that what this is all about?

Do you know how many, uh, "the world is ending" meetings

Do you know why?

Do you really wanna know what's going on?

Do you think you know me, Doctor?

Do you understand? I'm talking about...

Do you wanna say something too?

Do you want more wine?

Doc, you can see it.

Does anyone know what the fuck just happened?

Don't be shy. Come on. You're gonna be a god in the sky.

Don't forget to like and subscribe.

Don't listen to that dumbfuck.

Dr. Gary Talcamont.

Dr. Inez, would you like to explain what's happening?

Dr. Inez's micro targeted, quantum fission, uh, explosives.

Dr. Jocelyn Calder, the head of NASA,

Dr. Mindy, can I be vulnerable in your car?

Dr. Mindy, I hear you.

Dr. Mindy, the president's plan to save Earth

Dr. Oglethorpe.

Dr. Ov... Ogilvy. Yeah.

Dr. Randall, how are you, sir?

Dr. Randall, you are now the Chief Science Advisor to the White House.

Dr. Randall, you sure you're okay? You want a glass of water...

Drask's ship is definitely turning around.

Dude, he's obsessed with you. We love you. We don't like...

Economic collapse, loose nukes, car exhaust killing the atmosphere.

Eight and 27 are lost due to lateral control malfunction.

Especially the honorable members of my own party.

Especially you, Dr. Mindy, because you poll so much higher

Estimated time of arrival is approximately five months from now.

Evan, Marshall, June, this is Dr. Oglethorpe.

Every single man, woman and child on this planet is going to die.

Every time you have coffee, you have to grind your beans?

Everybody.

Everyone should be panicking right now, okay?

Everyone, I have just received

Everything is fine.

Everything is theoretically impossible

Exactly. 99.78% to be exact.

Exactly. They have an excellent astronomy department.

Excuse me, does the president know why we're here?

Exploding stars, like, stars actually explode.

FBI! Freeze! Get on your knees right now! Get on your knees!

Fine. Give it to me. I don't give a shit anymore.

First move is to get the school field trip out here to DC.

First thing in the morning before the article comes out.

Five, four...

For an emergency message from the president of the United States.

For him and all his executives.

For speaking out, for opposing them.

From a wedding proposal to a little science experiment.

From Kennedy Space Center.

From the New York Herald who will talk to us.

From the... from the Oort cloud.

Fuck it. We're all gonna die.

Fuck off, please.

Fuck you for putting this hood on me.

Fuck! You're driving me fucking crazy, Kate. [chuckles nervously]

Fuck. Do you wanna come?

Fucking lied to us.

Funny you should say that, I'm working on that now.

General Themes. I'm the Pentagon's eyes on, uh,

Gentlemen, you can come in.

Get a little air into it, you lard ass...

Get on it. Still waiting for a full status report.

Getting to know you part of relationships, so...

Go outside into your yard, onto a roof, onto your sidewalk,

God bless you.

God, I can't...

Gonna be three, four hours, tops.

Goodbye. Goodbye, Randall.

Goodness.

Got you some crackers, some waters.

Grow up here, okay?

Guess my boyfriend just broke up with me.

Guess what happened?

Guidance system could've malfunctioned, uh, nuke destabilized, myriad of things.

Guys, please just look up, okay? Screw the manatees and just look up.

Guys, this comet is seriously stressing me out.

Had a feeling something was going on and just...

Has any of this been peer reviewed?

Has completely lost their fucking mind!

Has now been identified as appearing in a softcore porn cable show

He charged us for the snacks, but they're free.

He got it from an astronomer friend of his in Mexico.

He leads me beside the quiet waters. He restores my soul.

He makes me to lie down in green pastures.

He says that,

He seems a step slow.

He will help us destroy our common enemy, Dibiasky.

He would take it back to first principles.

He's a solid four.

He's a three star general. He works at the Pentagon.

He's got a great body too.

He's got a great voice.

He's got this. I know he does.

He's great. Everything he does.

He's the guy that, uh, bought the Gutenberg Bible and lost it.

Head of the Planetary Defense Coordination Office."

Hello, everyone.

Hello, Sammy.

Here, Kate. I don't know why he threw 'em down. Here.

Here's the Zoloft he takes for the crashing depressions.

Hey, baby doll. Hey.

Hey, everyone. I'm Sean from the show.

Hey, gang, obviously everything we talked about in here, super classified, right?

Hey, good afternoon, Adam. What do I owe the pleasure of this call?

Hey, guys, we gotta keep walking, all right?

Hey, how's Evan feeling? Are the new meds working out?

Hey, Kate.

Hey, Madam President, may I have a word with you outside for a moment, please?

Hey, man.

Hey, now.

Hey, peeps, uh, it's not looking like it's gonna happen tonight,

Hey, why don't you go find some, uh...

Hey, why haven't you guys ever teamed up?

Hey.

Hi, I'm Thalia.

Hi, yes. Uh, Dr. Mindy.

Hi.

Hi. Oh, Brie, you look fabulous.

Hit the planet to jack up a cell phone company's stock!

Hmm.

Hmm. And what about our story?

Hmm. I don't... I don't know them.

Hmm. Wow. That's great.

Holy shit.

Holy shit. You're a stone cold legend. Word is bond.

Honestly, I think I'd just rather drink and...

How 'bout if we trim this beard down a little bit and...

How are we gonna do this? I talk about the discovery and you...

How is it criminal if we just tell people,

How many terms do you have to calibrate...

How would we find out the comet's velocity in orbit, Professor Mindy?

However, the Attorney General is willing to not pursue prosecution

Hurtling its way towards planet Earth is not a fucking good thing,

I actually like the junky taste of store bought better than homemade.

I advise you to do the same.

I already got buyers for these shovels on e market.

I also wanna say hello to all the Indians out there.

I am not on one side or the other.

I am so sorry, Dr. Calder,

I believe that's called a Bronteroc.

I bet they'll say freedom and puppies too.

I call this one Primo, the first. [laughing]

I can hear the sounds of some people praying.

I can't even follow this shit anymore!

I can't figure this one out. Not tonight, guys. Sorry.

I can't remember crying that much ever.

I can't remember the details, apart from one thing.

I can't think of another president that I'd ever wanna see in Playboy.

I care about DrinkMo's guarantee of quality service.

I did the orbital calculations.

I didn't vote for you.

I don't feel so good.

I don't know why I have this on.

I don't know, I haven't felt with anyone else,

I don't see what that has to do with anything, do you?

I don't think I wanna know. Yes, I do. I wanna to know.

I don't understand how many more times I need to tell you...

I don't... I don't see the relevancy.

I feel like if God wanted to destroy the Earth, He would destroy the Earth.

I feel like we're skirting around this.

I finally got my, uh, Star Wars poster signed by Mark Hamill.

I find the bird quite threatening.

I found five former students

I give you...

I got a picture of you on my board.

I got it.

I got three scared kids at home. Just tell us something.

I gotta go get high.

I gotta use my voice to get the truth out there, right?

I grind my own beans. Yeah.

I guess I'll just tell your sons

I had no idea that Subaru made telescopes.

I had the exact same reaction.

I had to sneak cigarettes for the whole first month of the campaign

I have a report here from a Dr. Inez.

I have a tattoo of a shooting star on my back.

I have already put together an emergency spending package for Congress...

I have asked

I have just been handed

I have news for you. It's already a complete disaster.

I have no shame in what I did.

I haven't published in a while so you probably haven't heard of me.

I hear you.

I heard there's an asteroid or a comet or something

I hooked up with her too, last year at the Music Globes

I hope she's got us all taken care of, but the truth is,

I hope to God, I hope to God that this president knows what she's doing.

I hope you understand...

I just despise the, you know,

I just don't... I don't understand what could've happened.

I just have more skin pigmentation than you.

I just wanna go home more than anything.

I just wanna make sure that the science is sound on this project.

I just... Kate, can I get something from you, please?

I knew I'd like this guy. Didn't I tell? You owe me 50 bucks.

I know what show you're talking about. My wife loves that show.

I know your words are a great comfort to all our viewers, Dr. Randall,

I know. But it's so stressful. I'm trying to, like, listen...

I looked you up after we met.

I love you too. All right. Yeah.

I love your hair.

I mean, for God's sake, we took a fucking picture of it!

I mean, look at that. That's so unnecessary.

I mean, my God, how do... How do we even talk to each other?

I mean, the mission was working, right? Everything was on track.

I mean, this is next generation cutting edge technology.

I mean, we have a purchase, but we don't have payment,

I mean, when you think about it.

I need the person who first had eyes on the comet

I put the moment of impact on a diet app.

I really liked you and I despise most people.

I really thought for a second that was gonna work out.

I speak four languages, and I own two Monets.

I think I probably should go to the [bleep] hospital and see what they...

I think of you and I just... I feel better.

I think that's Photoshop, Kate.

I think they were originally called the Four Kings of Harmony.

I think this is gonna work out quite well. Quite well, indeed.

I think this whole administration

I told you. We're, uh... We're gonna go buy some groceries.

I understand the wealth that they can extract from this comet,

I understand. I wish I could share information, but...

I wanna say hello to all the gays out there.

I wanna take you back.

I wanna talk to this person. You tell me who said the science...

I was hoping we could, um, have a family dinner.

I was in the Navy.

I was so excited I couldn't sleep for two nights,

I wasn't thinking straight. I made a mistake.

I will resign in disgrace first thing tomorrow.

I will, but in all fairness, I actually paid for the house.

I won't tell anybody. [chuckles] I think it's kind of sweet.

I wonder, are those feathers or are they scale...

I worry about my kids and their future.

I, uh... I study trace gasses in dead galaxies.

I... I got these for you.

I... I know when you have colon polyps

I... I'm looking at it right now too. It's unbelievable. It's...

I'd appreciate it if you didn't advertise it, though.

I'd just like to say

I'd like to buy these sunglasses.

I'll be back. All right. Come on.

I'll need a temple rub and a martini later on.

I'm being told that we have DJ Chello live on a Mugg link.

I'm definitely gonna have some more of this apple pie. It's so good.

I'm Dr. Oglethorpe, but you can call me Teddy.

I'm FirePuma142 on Twitch. You game?

I'm going to make a statement,

I'm good, but thank you for the offer. You, uh... You have fun with Jason.

I'm grateful...

I'm in Lansing, Michigan

I'm just gonna go to the restroom for a moment.

I'm just telling you the fucking truth.

I'm looking straight at it.

I'm so glad to hear that. You have no idea.

I'm so sorry, Kate. Really, I am.

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry. You have no idea.

I'm sorry, are we not being clear?

I'm sorry, but not everything needs to sound so goddamn clever

I'm sorry, but we need them.

I'm sorry, I'm just trying to articulate the science.

I'm sorry. Did you say your name...

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry.

I'm sorry. I've got a 20 year old daughter. I've got to go see her.

I'm sorry. Is that why you aborted this entire mission,

I'm sorry. Whoa, uh...

I'm starting to think that all this "end of the world" stuff is bullshit.

I'm taking it very seriously. I'm taking it straight in the heart.

I'm talking about nutritionists.

I'm talking about personal trainers,

I'm thankful for that night I fell asleep out in the backyard.

I'm the fucking Chief of Staff, Boy with the Dragon Tattoo.

I'm the last man on Earth.

I'm trying to articulate it the best I can...

I'm very sorry. I have to be in Okinawa by two o'clock tomorrow.

I'm, uh, going for a walk if you wanna come.

I'm... I'm just so, so thrilled for you, Kate.

I've been head of planetary defense at NASA for 15 years.

I've been noticing a lot of prayers recently for people during this time

I've been running it all day. I keep getting the same result.

I've been scared, but, honestly, I'm not scared anymore.

I've got Kate as well.

I've just realized, we don't really know anything about each other. Do we?

I've never met anyone like you

I've seen the science on this plan and it is sound.

If anyone tells you any different, they're full of shit.

If BASH's stock is any indicator,

If I feel...

If I get snuffed,

If I'm to be completely honest, which at this moment, why not?

If it isn't deflected, the entire planet dies.

If she wasn't my mother...

If this comet makes impact, it will have the power of a billion Hiroshima bombs.

If we're to proceed...

If you don't have one, get out of line and make room for other customers.

If you will agree to the following:

If you'll excuse me, Madam President. I've got some work to do.

In case we were wrong, and clearly, we were wrong.

In case you didn't notice, the White House just blew us off.

In conjunction with the United States Government

In historic fashion in order to save this planet.

In the CERN particle accelerator

In the manufacture of cell phones and, uh, computers.

Inciting a riot, and destruction of private property

Instantly senses my mood through blood pressure...

Intergalactic existence for the human race.

Interplanetary, interstellar,

Into the Pacific Ocean for reclamation by waiting US Navy ships.

Into the the glory of a golden age...

Introducing BASH LiiF.

Is anyone else seeing this? That's it.

Is because we saw it.

Is because you're trying to mine the comet for rare minerals?

Is creating a new hotline, free of charge, to answer all of your questions.

Is fully integrated into your every feeling and desire

Is he allowed to be in here?

Is headed directly at Earth.

Is now on a direct collision course with our cherished home, planet Earth.

Is optimizing our prepubescent sense memory consumer sector?

Is she always like that?

Is she even an astronomer?

Is that a rock solid ten smokeshow of a president or what?

Is that all of us, all of us...

Is that the idea of sitting tight is an extremely, extremely dangerous...

Is there life out there?

Is this really happening?

Is this what you want in your country as a leader?

Is to lay down one's yoke of pride

Is when Riley Bina asked to take DJ Chello back

Isn't it important that he was in the room with us? I mean, what...

Isn't she the same person who told poor people

Isn't supposed to be fun.

Isn't that from Saving Private Ryan?

It also, seriously, uh, schedules

It can end world hunger.

It got me so excited to know about my own death.

It is going gangbusters.

It is going to happen.

It was a comet.

It would damage the entire planet.

It'll be gridlocked.

It's a fucking fact.

It's a good feeling 'cause that is what I did.

It's a joke. But also...

It's a lot smaller than in the photographs.

It's a party.

It's about soldiers going off to World War II

It's actually store bought, but you really can't tell.

It's all corrupt.

It's definitely happening. I've seen it.

It's definitely turning around.

It's fine. It's fine.

It's for a video game.

It's for everyone. You know? It's a popcorn movie.

It's free.

It's from a 14th century poem I studied in Dartmouth.

It's gonna be all right. If you'll excuse me. [chuckles]

It's gonna be called A Brush With The Devil, and it's, uh...

It's gotta be, look... It's gotta be an Oort cloud comet

It's headed directly at Earth, and it really likely will hit.

It's horrific and it's... And it's beautiful at the same time.

It's in the garage. It's... So, yeah.

It's incredible, isn't it?

It's incredible.

It's insane. Like, completely insane.

It's just the protocol. Please, don't worry.

It's like he knew eventually that I was gonna find out that the snacks were free.

It's like my first child.

It's like the best show. Everyone wants to be on it.

It's not.

It's not. Now we look like idiots.

It's on a plate.

It's pretty standard.

It's real and it's coming.

It's really doubtful she knows.

It's right there, Kate.

It's shitty.

It's something we do around here. We just keep the bad news light.

It's somewhere between six and nine kilometers across.

It's state of the art cryo chambers, and it's set to find

It's still intact.

It's still locked.

Jack and Brie are so excited to have you on the show.

Janie Orlean...

Jason Orlean? You want Jason Orlean in that room? Huh?

Jason, hey.

Jason?

Jesus Christ!

Jesus Christ. I'm gonna put them on speaker.

Jesus.

June, I...

June, what, uh... What are you doing here, sweetie?

Just a different generation. Yeah.

Just based on where you saw it.

Just bought another.

Just came out calling it "more near miss hysteria."

Just how happy we were at BASH

Just look up into the sky.

Just look up!

Just remember, keep it light, fun.

Kate was, um, observing supernovas...

Kate, not this time. Not this time.

Kate, this isn't real, right? This is, uh...

Kate, what are the initial coordinates?

Kate? Kate?

Keep it right there. You're doing good.

Keep it simple.

Know what happened to the last pussy I worked with in combat?

Ladies, gentlemen, I wish you a very pleasant end of times.

Lady Baroque wasn't wearing any panties in the club that night.

Launch your own nuclear deflection mission now and save this planet!

Let me just give you some instructions

Let us not bullshit each other.

Let's call it a night, huh?

Let's not be dramatic here.

Life, without the stress of living.

Like a... Like a field mouse.

Like any kind of power.

Like the public, you know, what we saw, and tell them the truth?

Listen to this part.

Listen, a lot of my colleagues,

Listen, if you don't have enough, we all have enough around here for her.

Listen, just tell us what's going on.

Listen, we got a sighting

Loaded with nuclear explosives.

Look at the arc on that thing. God, it's amazing.

Look at the difference between that and the farm raised stuff.

Look at this, Kate. They have wild salmon.

Look out!

Look, I... I was confused and outraged that they turned this mission around too,

Look, I'm just like all of you.

Look, let's establish, once again,

Looks like it's turning around.

Madam President, I'm Dr. Oglethorpe. I believe Jocelyn briefed you to...

Madam President, this comet is what we call a planet killer.

Madam President?

Madam President. [breathing heavily]

Made by the astrogeologists at BASH Cellular,

Make sure this one gets media training before he hits the shows.

Man, oh, man, did we try.

Margin of error was for two to malfunction.

May Jesus Christ bless every single one of you,

May we face whatever is to come...

Maybe I should have given her that extra Xanax that I had.

Maybe it's supposed to be terrifying.

Me too.

Medal of Freedom recipient and outspoken patriot, Benedict Drask,

Members of my party are currently drawing up a formal censure

Miss Dibiasky, she...

Mission success probability is already increased to 81%.

Mmm hmm.

Mmm hmm.

Mom!

Mom!

Mom?

Mom. Dad.

Months before your doctor does.

Most of all, Lord...

Mr. Isherwell, Paul Debent wanted me to give this to you.

Mr. Pawketty, Congressman, this data has been proven

My algorithms have determined eight fundamental consumer profile types.

My boyfriend, Phillip, says he knows a reporter

My brother has bipolar disorder. So if you ever need anyone to talk...

My friend was just theorizing as to what's going on.

My God.

My grandfather invented the flash freezing process.

My little bumblebee, will you marry me?

My mother, she cut hair out of the kitchen.

My own relationship.

My phone just purchased DJ Chello's latest single.

Nations of the world, defy Orlean and BASH!

Nature calls.

Need a full status report on the explosive devices.

No math.

No matter how offensive I may find you.

No offense, but you're just two people that walked in here with...

No politics. None.

No, I heard that they built an escape ship.

No, I'm not kidding.

No, I've been pretty wrapped up in our... project.

No, it's not. It's a course correction.

No, Please, Brie. Don't cut away. Let me say something.

No.

No. It will be far more catastrophic.

No. What's your purchase?

No. You're free to go.

Nobel and Polonsky prize winning scientist

Nope.

Nope. It's turning around.

Not Bitcoin, RatCoin. RatCoin.

Not gonna lie, but, um, my friends

Not just a house, you know?

Not one single shit.

Not roaming charges.

Not since D Day have we seen such a mass mobilization

Nothing is better than homemade, right?

Now Adul Grelio has come down from his mountaintop for your thing.

Now that we have the comet's orbit, we will check the ephemeris

Now, I'm starting to think you just like riling people up.

Now, Jack was having some fun here.

Now, should I say "noticeably aroused"?

Obviously, one giant comet is a major and existential, uh, threat to our planet,

Of a breaking emergency sort of...

Of an NEO from Subaru telescope.

Of course they didn't call you in. Kate, have you watched any news today?

Of course you've got a ship.

Of course, there's only one story everyone's talking about tonight.

Of course. Jack and Brie love doing science segments.

Of the president,

Of unions and resources for such a noble task.

Offer only available to BASH customers.

Oh, can we just skip past this part, please?

Oh, Doctor. There are always questions and fears, and...

Oh, give me the phones. They're not yours.