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The World According to Garp "The World According to Garp" is not a movie, television show, or song, but rather a novel

The World According to Garp

"The World According to Garp" is not a movie, television show, or song, but rather a novel written by John Irving. Published in 1978, it quickly became a literary sensation, capturing hearts and minds with its unique blend of comedy, tragedy, and exploration of complex themes. While there have been adaptations of the book into film and the stage, the original subject at hand is the novel itself.

Set against the backdrop of the mid-20th century, "The World According to Garp" revolves around the life and experiences of T.S. Garp, a struggling writer and aspiring novelist. Garp's life is marked by countless absurd and often tragic events, which shape his writing and the world around him. The novel delves into various themes, such as the complexity of human relationships, the changing norms of society, and the role and tension of gender roles.

Garp is portrayed as a larger-than-life character, with Robin Williams famously bringing his energy and charisma to the role in the 1982 film adaptation. Unfortunately, as this belongs to a different medium, there is no cast list or band members to mention. However, the film cast also included Glenn Close, Mary Beth Hurt, and John Lithgow, among others. Directed by George Roy Hill, the film captured the essence of the novel and garnered several award nominations.

John Irving's novel resonated with readers due to its blend of humor, sheer originality, and the exploration of complex themes. It addresses topics such as sexuality, feminism, non-conformity, and the fragility of life in a refreshingly honest and thought-provoking way. Garp himself is a character who defies stereotypes and societal expectations, challenging the status quo both in his personal life and through his writing.

"The World According to Garp" is hailed as a work of literary genius due to Irving's masterful storytelling and the memorable characters that populate the book. Alongside Garp, there is Jenny Fields, his fiercely independent and unconventional mother, who becomes a feminist icon through her autobiography detailing how she became pregnant without having sex. Throughout the novel, these characters encounter various eccentric individuals, adding depth and quirks to the narrative.

One of the novel's most memorable subplots revolves around the fictional novel within the novel, "The World According to Bensenhaver." This imaginary work is written by Garp's childhood friend, Roberta Muldoon, who later undergoes a sex-change operation. Through this subplot, Irving examines the fluidity of identity and the complex nature of personal transformations.

Furthermore, "The World According to Garp" explores the universal human desire for love, connection, and understanding. Garp's relationships with his wife, Helen, and their children are at the core of the story, beautifully capturing the inherent messiness and complexity of family life. The novel depicts the highs and lows of these relationships, highlighting the bonds that endure through hardship and tragedy.

While it may not be a movie, television show, or song, "The World According to Garp" has had a profound impact on popular culture. Its influence can be felt in subsequent works of fiction, with other authors drawing inspiration from Irving's unique writing style and fearless exploration of controversial themes. The novel has also become a staple in university literature courses, further solidifying its place as a timeless classic.

In conclusion, "The World According to Garp" is a literary gem that continues to captivate readers around the world. Through its rich characters, multifaceted themes, and wit, the novel leaves a lasting impression on those who delve into its pages. Whether in print or on the big screen, the story of T.S. Garp and his unpredictable world will forever hold a special place in the realm of contemporary literature.

A bit thin.
A bit thin.
A flag for the Fourth of July.
A flag for the Fourth of July.
A little bit more over. There we are. I've got you. I'm not gonna let go.
A little bit more over. There we are. I've got you. I'm not gonna let go.
A man killed her. They're very upset.
A man killed her. They're very upset.
A real baby.
A real baby.
A splinter of steel had lodged in his brain...
A splinter of steel had lodged in his brain...
About what?
About what?
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
All of our lives.
All of our lives.
All real writers imagine.
All real writers imagine.
All right, Duncan. This is Technical Sergeant Garp.
All right, Duncan. This is Technical Sergeant Garp.
All right, first thing is...
All right, first thing is...
All right, kids, fun's over.
All right, kids, fun's over.
All right, same thing. Bottom man down. Same man down.
All right, same thing. Bottom man down. Same man down.
All right? I'm not gonna let go. You're going to be all right.
All right? I'm not gonna let go. You're going to be all right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right. Fine.
All right. Fine.
And all he could say was his name, "Garp."
And all he could say was his name, "Garp."
And being a family man.
And being a family man.
And close to the supermarket where I'll be shopping.
And close to the supermarket where I'll be shopping.
And fling his vile blade.
And fling his vile blade.
And help her heal herself, before it's too late for both of you.
And help her heal herself, before it's too late for both of you.
And I am gone, gone, gone. Love, Ruth."
And I am gone, gone, gone. Love, Ruth."
And I bet...
And I bet...
And I do.
And I do.
And I've been talking to Helen.
And I've been talking to Helen.
And if you're very lucky, you'll have many, many friends...
And if you're very lucky, you'll have many, many friends...
And many, many memories.
And many, many memories.
And mine is one!
And mine is one!
And Mom's publisher said that he'll publish my first novel too.
And Mom's publisher said that he'll publish my first novel too.
And most of the falls.
And most of the falls.
And my firm will even finance the mortgage.
And my firm will even finance the mortgage.
And my husband putters around the house.
And my husband putters around the house.
And never even notice that this is as beautiful as life gets.
And never even notice that this is as beautiful as life gets.
And now we are homeless.
And now we are homeless.
And only if it's clean.
And only if it's clean.
And reminds me why I'm doing this. So you can keep it up.
And reminds me why I'm doing this. So you can keep it up.
And see the arc of your life. It's all connected.
And see the arc of your life. It's all connected.
And she's only running for governor. Goodbye, darling.
And she's only running for governor. Goodbye, darling.
And short stories.
And short stories.
And since I miss her terribly, I want to be around...
And since I miss her terribly, I want to be around...
And some coffee.
And some coffee.
And stand in front of a mirror and look at myself for hours.
And stand in front of a mirror and look at myself for hours.
And stop getting other women to hurt themselves.
And stop getting other women to hurt themselves.
And the same nobodies are gonna line up not to buy that one too.
And the same nobodies are gonna line up not to buy that one too.
And the scum of the earth.
And the scum of the earth.
And the wounded and maimed were all asleep, I went to him.
And the wounded and maimed were all asleep, I went to him.
And then he died.
And then he died.
And then there's snow falling in my eye.
And then there's snow falling in my eye.
And therefore...
And therefore...
And they aren't going to allow any men.
And they aren't going to allow any men.
And they won't let me adopt.
And they won't let me adopt.
And we now can speak for ourselves...
And we now can speak for ourselves...
And we're also out of syrup.
And we're also out of syrup.
And you can think about them.
And you can think about them.
And you just keep pouring salt on the wounds.
And you just keep pouring salt on the wounds.
And you tell that wimp...
And you tell that wimp...
And you write too. Isn't that nice?
And you write too. Isn't that nice?
And your mother tries to nurse them back to health.
And your mother tries to nurse them back to health.
And, uh...
And, uh...
Anonymity promotes honesty. Thank you.
Anonymity promotes honesty. Thank you.
Anybody can say "Mama," Duncan. Come on, quit torturing me.
Anybody can say "Mama," Duncan. Come on, quit torturing me.
Anyway, the war was on.
Anyway, the war was on.
Anyway...
Anyway...
Apache, Helen. Not even Shakespeare or Dickens...
Apache, Helen. Not even Shakespeare or Dickens...
Are you gonna go to sleep or you gonna stay up and think your weird thoughts?
Are you gonna go to sleep or you gonna stay up and think your weird thoughts?
Are you okay?
Are you okay?
Are you really 18?
Are you really 18?
Arp!
Arp!
As many people as possible who feel the same way as I do.
As many people as possible who feel the same way as I do.
As soon as possible.
As soon as possible.
At least he's better off than...
At least he's better off than...
At least the dog's got good taste, doesn't he?
At least the dog's got good taste, doesn't he?
Be a man, Michael.
Be a man, Michael.
Be careful of the undertow!
Be careful of the undertow!
Because he comes down the chimney.
Because he comes down the chimney.
Because of a pot roast. Isn't that a pity?
Because of a pot roast. Isn't that a pity?
Because of what happened to a little girl named Ellen James.
Because of what happened to a little girl named Ellen James.
Because she taught us how.
Because she taught us how.
Because they're guys.
Because they're guys.
Because they're ugly.
Because they're ugly.
Because we all loved her.
Because we all loved her.
Because you're too young. I've looked into them all.
Because you're too young. I've looked into them all.
Behind him, Marcus.
Behind him, Marcus.
Being a father.
Being a father.
Being a husband and a father. Oh, I really adore it.
Being a husband and a father. Oh, I really adore it.
Black Snow.
Black Snow.
Bonkers, give me that paper, you hairy son of a bitch!
Bonkers, give me that paper, you hairy son of a bitch!
Bonkers, you chickenshit! If I were a dog, you'd be dead!
Bonkers, you chickenshit! If I were a dog, you'd be dead!
Bonkers.
Bonkers.
Bonkie, come on, now. Give me the paper.
Bonkie, come on, now. Give me the paper.
Bonkie! Are you all right, big boy?
Bonkie! Are you all right, big boy?
Bosworth.
Bosworth.
Bosworth. A word of warning, you filth monger.
Bosworth. A word of warning, you filth monger.
Boy, they take advantage of her.
Boy, they take advantage of her.
Boy, you are something, Walt.
Boy, you are something, Walt.
Bring him down.
Bring him down.
Bring him into the infirmary.
Bring him into the infirmary.
Bring that along, will you? We can return it.
Bring that along, will you? We can return it.
But God or nature or whatever... Well, you know, you need a man.
But God or nature or whatever... Well, you know, you need a man.
But God, this is self mutilation. Suppose, next time there's a ****...
But God, this is self mutilation. Suppose, next time there's a ****...
But has to feel responsible for women whacking their tongues off in her name.
But has to feel responsible for women whacking their tongues off in her name.
But he can't feel them. He yearns to feel.
But he can't feel them. He yearns to feel.
But he finally feels life as he's flying into the arms of death.
But he finally feels life as he's flying into the arms of death.
But he's a daddy, and she's a mommy.
But he's a daddy, and she's a mommy.
But her words have been passed on to each one of us.
But her words have been passed on to each one of us.
But I really feel the need to look at them.
But I really feel the need to look at them.
But I thought she was a fine woman.
But I thought she was a fine woman.
But I'm a natural at only two things:
But I'm a natural at only two things:
But I'm afraid you can't go.
But I'm afraid you can't go.
But it is not fiction. It's a long, merciless attack.
But it is not fiction. It's a long, merciless attack.
But now that voice...
But now that voice...
But right now, I want to share it with as many people as I can.
But right now, I want to share it with as many people as I can.
But she can't come along with us. No. Absolutely not.
But she can't come along with us. No. Absolutely not.
But since I can't have that...
But since I can't have that...
But then you've got to go.
But then you've got to go.
But to have it bitten off...
But to have it bitten off...
But you're all I've got. I broke up with Marge.
But you're all I've got. I broke up with Marge.
But your mother has written a political manifesto.
But your mother has written a political manifesto.
By a madman's bullet.
By a madman's bullet.
Bye bye.
Bye bye.
Bye, darlings.
Bye, darlings.
Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad.
Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad.
Bye, Uncle John.
Bye, Uncle John.
Can I go in?
Can I go in?
Can I go swimming?
Can I go swimming?
Can I help you?
Can I help you?
Can you speak?
Can you speak?
Catches you.
Catches you.
Coaching.
Coaching.
Come down, Stephen.
Come down, Stephen.
Come down.
Come down.
Come here.
Come here.
Come home.
Come home.
Come in.
Come in.
Come on in here.
Come on in here.
Come on in. I'll take you up to your room.
Come on in. I'll take you up to your room.
Come on upstairs. I'll show you your rooms.
Come on upstairs. I'll show you your rooms.
Come on, Dad! Let's go!
Come on, Dad! Let's go!
Come on, Danny, we got them.
Come on, Danny, we got them.
Come on, Duncan. Say "Dada."
Come on, Duncan. Say "Dada."
Come on, Elmer.
Come on, Elmer.
Come on, family man.
Come on, family man.
Come on, Garp.
Come on, Garp.
Come on, Martin. Ride him! Ride!
Come on, Martin. Ride him! Ride!
Come on, Pooh. Time for lunch.
Come on, Pooh. Time for lunch.
Come on! Come on!
Come on! Come on!
Come on.
Come on.
Come on. Don't moan if you want to eat dinner.
Come on. Don't moan if you want to eat dinner.
Come on. Good reversal there. Get off your back.
Come on. Good reversal there. Get off your back.
Come on. Let's go. Weak side.
Come on. Let's go. Weak side.
Crazy dyke blindsided me.
Crazy dyke blindsided me.
Cushie.
Cushie.
Cushie. Cushie!
Cushie. Cushie!
Cushion his fall!
Cushion his fall!
Cute little bugger, isn't he?
Cute little bugger, isn't he?
Dada's dead. He got killed.
Dada's dead. He got killed.
Damn it.
Damn it.
Damn you, Duncan. Leave him alone.
Damn you, Duncan. Leave him alone.
Death's like that.
Death's like that.
Defend our board, come on.
Defend our board, come on.
Did he take out the stitches?
Did he take out the stitches?
Did you know he had a beautiful tenor voice?
Did you know he had a beautiful tenor voice?
Did you seduce that babysitter?
Did you seduce that babysitter?
Did you see the doctor?
Did you see the doctor?
Dirty 30?
Dirty 30?
Dirty 30.
Dirty 30.
Do you get any physical enjoyment from it?
Do you get any physical enjoyment from it?
Do you miss writing?
Do you miss writing?
Do you realize how good he is?
Do you realize how good he is?
Do you think you're playing doctor's office with Cushie?
Do you think you're playing doctor's office with Cushie?
Do you understand? It's a small town.
Do you understand? It's a small town.
Do you want her like you want Helen? Is it the same kind of want?
Do you want her like you want Helen? Is it the same kind of want?
Do you want her?
Do you want her?
Does it degrade you to have my son want you in that way?
Does it degrade you to have my son want you in that way?
Don't know.
Don't know.
Don't say that.
Don't say that.
Don't touch me! Don't touch me!
Don't touch me! Don't touch me!
Don't you dare say "sperm" in this house.
Don't you dare say "sperm" in this house.
Down. Set. Hut, hut, hut.
Down. Set. Hut, hut, hut.
Duncan and Walt are crazy about you.
Duncan and Walt are crazy about you.
Duncan did the eyebrows...
Duncan did the eyebrows...
Duncan, a kiss for Grandma?
Duncan, a kiss for Grandma?
Duncan.
Duncan.
Eighteen?
Eighteen?
Eighteen.
Eighteen.
Eighteen.
Eighteen.
Ellen James wrote them a letter begging them to disband...
Ellen James wrote them a letter begging them to disband...
Ernie, congratulations. You beat us on the takedowns.
Ernie, congratulations. You beat us on the takedowns.
Even when they're healthy, they're sick with lust.
Even when they're healthy, they're sick with lust.
Ever since I began running for governor of New Hampshire...
Ever since I began running for governor of New Hampshire...
Every bookstore in the U.S.
Every bookstore in the U.S.
Every time we come here, there are more people.
Every time we come here, there are more people.
Everybody knows that one... Hey!
Everybody knows that one... Hey!
Everybody thought he died, but he didn't die.
Everybody thought he died, but he didn't die.
Everyone here has something missing or some wound that won't heal.
Everyone here has something missing or some wound that won't heal.
Everyone, please sit down. Please.
Everyone, please sit down. Please.
Everything is fine. Barbara, it's all right.
Everything is fine. Barbara, it's all right.
Everything will be fine.
Everything will be fine.
Everything, Helen.
Everything, Helen.
Except death.
Except death.
Find out if that's the son of a bitch's first or last name.
Find out if that's the son of a bitch's first or last name.
Fine. Well, good night, then, Bosworth.
Fine. Well, good night, then, Bosworth.
Five seconds! Behind him.
Five seconds! Behind him.
Five. Four. Three. Two.
Five. Four. Three. Two.
For any occasion.
For any occasion.
For both of us to look at them.
For both of us to look at them.
For Christmas, I want a glass eye like one of those crystal balls...
For Christmas, I want a glass eye like one of those crystal balls...
For medical reasons I couldn't understand...
For medical reasons I couldn't understand...
Forty three, 29. Forty three, 29.
Forty three, 29. Forty three, 29.
Garp just frightened Alice for a bit, but she's fine.
Garp just frightened Alice for a bit, but she's fine.
Garp wants to take over.
Garp wants to take over.
Garp wasn't really concentrating in the first period.
Garp wasn't really concentrating in the first period.
Garp, are you up there? Jenny Fields, are you up there?
Garp, are you up there? Jenny Fields, are you up there?
Garp, I'm here.
Garp, I'm here.
Garp, what are you doing in here?
Garp, what are you doing in here?
Garp!
Garp!
Garp! Garp.
Garp! Garp.
Garp! Garp. How lovely to see you.
Garp! Garp. How lovely to see you.
Garp! You've no right to write this!
Garp! You've no right to write this!
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp?
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp.
Garp. Careful of the undertow.
Garp. Careful of the undertow.
Garp. Garp!
Garp. Garp!
Get a doctor! Get an ambulance!
Get a doctor! Get an ambulance!
Get him, Bosworth.
Get him, Bosworth.
Get him, Garp!
Get him, Garp!
Get him, Helen. Stay tight with him.
Get him, Helen. Stay tight with him.
Get him! Come on! Go!
Get him! Come on! Go!
Get in the goddamn back.
Get in the goddamn back.
Get in there!
Get in there!
Get off me! What are you doing?
Get off me! What are you doing?
Get off your back, Virgil.
Get off your back, Virgil.
Get someone! Quickly!
Get someone! Quickly!
Get the mattresses close together next to the building so he can fall on them.
Get the mattresses close together next to the building so he can fall on them.
Get your mattresses! Put your mattresses under!
Get your mattresses! Put your mattresses under!
Give and go, guys. Move it up.
Give and go, guys. Move it up.
Give me the keys.
Give me the keys.
Give me your car keys, and I'll get in the car for a minute.
Give me your car keys, and I'll get in the car for a minute.
Go away.
Go away.
Go back to what you were doing before.
Go back to what you were doing before.
Go to your mother. She's a nurse. She can take care of it.
Go to your mother. She's a nurse. She can take care of it.
Go, Martin. Come on!
Go, Martin. Come on!
Go!
Go!
God, you're one of them. Listen.
God, you're one of them. Listen.
Good night, Garp!
Good night, Garp!
Good night.
Good night.
Good night.
Good night.
Good night. Thank you so much.
Good night. Thank you so much.
Goodbye, Duncan.
Goodbye, Duncan.
Goodbye, sweetheart.
Goodbye, sweetheart.
Got you.
Got you.
Gradual school?
Gradual school?
Has been silenced...
Has been silenced...
Has been translated into Apache.
Has been translated into Apache.
Have a heartbreak in Manhattan.
Have a heartbreak in Manhattan.
Have at last found one in Jenny Fields!
Have at last found one in Jenny Fields!
Having a life.
Having a life.
Having some trouble?
Having some trouble?
He also had a constant erection.
He also had a constant erection.
He beat you on your feet. He got all the takedowns.
He beat you on your feet. He got all the takedowns.
He can do wonders when he's wearing his magic gloves.
He can do wonders when he's wearing his magic gloves.
He can even hold off death with his magic gloves, but he can't feel life.
He can even hold off death with his magic gloves, but he can't feel life.
He deteriorated steadily.
He deteriorated steadily.
He did die.
He did die.
He didn't even know we were married.
He didn't even know we were married.
He ejaculated, and as a result, I've got a wonderful baby.
He ejaculated, and as a result, I've got a wonderful baby.
He never made any money. He worked as a clerk to support his family.
He never made any money. He worked as a clerk to support his family.
He said, "Good."
He said, "Good."
He sure did. Dead and gone.
He sure did. Dead and gone.
He touched me. He touched me.
He touched me. He touched me.
He was 21 when he entered the Feis Ceoil in Dublin.
He was 21 when he entered the Feis Ceoil in Dublin.
He was asleep. But his erection was there, as always.
He was asleep. But his erection was there, as always.
He was dying. I wanted a child.
He was dying. I wanted a child.
He was flat on his back in a hospital.
He was flat on his back in a hospital.
He was runner up in the tenor category.
He was runner up in the tenor category.
He woke up then.
He woke up then.
He's bright enough, he's just...
He's bright enough, he's just...
He's dead already.
He's dead already.
He's just...
He's just...
He's one of my gradual students.
He's one of my gradual students.
He's under the house, and he won't come out!
He's under the house, and he won't come out!
He's young, he's handsome.
He's young, he's handsome.
Heal yourself, damn it.
Heal yourself, damn it.
Hel...
Hel...
Helen Holm.
Helen Holm.
Helen, do you know that this is going to be published in The Review?
Helen, do you know that this is going to be published in The Review?
Helen!
Helen!
Helen!
Helen!
Helen!
Helen!
Helen! Helen!
Helen! Helen!
Helen! We haven't got much time.
Helen! We haven't got much time.
Helen?
Helen?
Helen.
Helen.
Helen. My short story!
Helen. My short story!
Hello again.
Hello again.
Hello, Duncan.
Hello, Duncan.
Hello, Garp?
Hello, Garp?
Hello, how nice to see you again.
Hello, how nice to see you again.
Hello?
Hello?
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello. Look, this is a residential neighborhood.
Hello. Look, this is a residential neighborhood.
Help me get her in the car.
Help me get her in the car.
Help, help, help.
Help, help, help.
Help! Help!
Help! Help!
Here.
Here.
Here. Take mine.
Here. Take mine.
Hey, everybody inside. Get the mattresses.
Hey, everybody inside. Get the mattresses.
Hey, Garp, how are you doing?
Hey, Garp, how are you doing?
Hey, look, it's all right with me if your mother wants to buy me for you.
Hey, look, it's all right with me if your mother wants to buy me for you.
Hey, you! Wait! Wait!
Hey, you! Wait! Wait!
Hey, you. Dildo.
Hey, you. Dildo.
Hey!
Hey!
Hey! Hey, you, stop!
Hey! Hey, you, stop!
Hi, Jenny.
Hi, Jenny.
Hi, my name's T.S. Garp.
Hi, my name's T.S. Garp.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
His erections continued, however, quite unabated.
His erections continued, however, quite unabated.
His novel was just published, Procrastination by T.S. Garp.
His novel was just published, Procrastination by T.S. Garp.
His writing is nowhere near as good as yours.
His writing is nowhere near as good as yours.
Hiya, teacher.
Hiya, teacher.
Hold him down. Ride him. Good!
Hold him down. Ride him. Good!
Home? What home? We're going to go to a movie.
Home? What home? We're going to go to a movie.
Honey, the chances of another plane hitting this house are astronomical.
Honey, the chances of another plane hitting this house are astronomical.
Hope I'm not disturbing you, running up and down here.
Hope I'm not disturbing you, running up and down here.
How about a hug for Grandma?
How about a hug for Grandma?
How about that?
How about that?
How are they?
How are they?
How do you feel to be wanted in that way?
How do you feel to be wanted in that way?
How old are you, Granny?
How old are you, Granny?
How old are you?
How old are you?
How we met. All that.
How we met. All that.
How you got from there to here.
How you got from there to here.
How young? Seventeen?
How young? Seventeen?
How's the basketball team, coach?
How's the basketball team, coach?
How's your fellow in New York working out?
How's your fellow in New York working out?
I always wanted a child.
I always wanted a child.
I am Jenny Fields and...
I am Jenny Fields and...
I am known as the bastard son of Jenny Fields.
I am known as the bastard son of Jenny Fields.
I came as soon as I could after your letter.
I came as soon as I could after your letter.
I can live in the present and think about the past.
I can live in the present and think about the past.
I can see that.
I can see that.
I can spot it a mile away. He's lusting after your daughter.
I can spot it a mile away. He's lusting after your daughter.
I can talk to you because you're past that.
I can talk to you because you're past that.
I can't. I just can't.
I can't. I just can't.
I could have blocked the shot. I would have done it.
I could have blocked the shot. I would have done it.
I cut off my prick and wear it around my neck.
I cut off my prick and wear it around my neck.
I did a fine thing, son, having you.
I did a fine thing, son, having you.
I did.
I did.
I didn't know I loved them so much until I became a woman.
I didn't know I loved them so much until I became a woman.
I didn't wanna marry. I wanted a baby.
I didn't wanna marry. I wanted a baby.
I do too.
I do too.
I do. I really, really do.
I do. I really, really do.
I don't know about Jenny, but I'm getting hate mail for publishing it.
I don't know about Jenny, but I'm getting hate mail for publishing it.
I don't know where she is.
I don't know where she is.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know. From what I saw of her...
I don't know. From what I saw of her...
I don't know. I never saw him standing up.
I don't know. I never saw him standing up.
I don't know. It's probably nothing.
I don't know. It's probably nothing.
I don't know. Who do you think she's talking to?
I don't know. Who do you think she's talking to?
I don't mean just her sex parts.
I don't mean just her sex parts.
I don't suppose you bothered to get married.
I don't suppose you bothered to get married.
I don't think I can drive the fucking car.
I don't think I can drive the fucking car.
I don't want them anymore.
I don't want them anymore.
I don't want your names on these.
I don't want your names on these.
I don't. I really don't.
I don't. I really don't.
I even died and lived to tell about it.
I even died and lived to tell about it.
I feel horrible without all of you here.
I feel horrible without all of you here.
I got a good idea too. Why not cut off your tits?
I got a good idea too. Why not cut off your tits?
I got on top of him, and he squirted it in me.
I got on top of him, and he squirted it in me.
I got you, I got you, I got you.
I got you, I got you, I got you.
I gotta cook. I gotta clean. Gotta cry.
I gotta cook. I gotta clean. Gotta cry.
I grieve because I loved her.
I grieve because I loved her.
I grieve...
I grieve...
I guess I'd better give you something to write about, huh?
I guess I'd better give you something to write about, huh?
I guess Randy needs me.
I guess Randy needs me.
I hate to use a corny line like this, but haven't I seen you before?
I hate to use a corny line like this, but haven't I seen you before?
I hated crowds.
I hated crowds.
I have a headache. Oh, my head. I have a headache. Not tonight.
I have a headache. Oh, my head. I have a headache. Not tonight.
I have just read in TIME magazine...
I have just read in TIME magazine...
I have this terrible headache.
I have this terrible headache.
I have to get home now. You've been very kind.
I have to get home now. You've been very kind.
I invited him over to meet you.
I invited him over to meet you.
I just can't see you right now...
I just can't see you right now...
I just did.
I just did.
I just feel happy that I noticed. I had a beautiful life today.
I just feel happy that I noticed. I had a beautiful life today.
I just want them to stop what they do. Ellen wants that too.
I just want them to stop what they do. Ellen wants that too.
I just want to know why you've selected...
I just want to know why you've selected...
I just want to talk to you. Wait...
I just want to talk to you. Wait...
I keep buying them, and my husband keeps burning them.
I keep buying them, and my husband keeps burning them.
I kept warning her to stay away from crowds.
I kept warning her to stay away from crowds.
I kept warning her. I did.
I kept warning her. I did.
I knew it, I knew it. A goddamn soldier.
I knew it, I knew it. A goddamn soldier.
I know all about it.
I know all about it.
I know what I want.
I know what I want.
I know what sort of creeps hang around here.
I know what sort of creeps hang around here.
I know what we can do later on.
I know what we can do later on.
I know, that's my book. I really don't...
I know, that's my book. I really don't...
I know. He just can't talk.
I know. He just can't talk.
I know. I just want to sit and talk with you.
I know. I just want to sit and talk with you.
I left the number of the theater by the phone in case you have any trouble.
I left the number of the theater by the phone in case you have any trouble.
I like it.
I like it.
I like that kid.
I like that kid.
I like that. If that's what it means, I like it.
I like that. If that's what it means, I like it.
I like you calling me "teacher."
I like you calling me "teacher."
I love dreadful films.
I love dreadful films.
I love it.
I love it.
I mean, I had mine removed surgically...
I mean, I had mine removed surgically...
I mean, I have talent as a writer...
I mean, I have talent as a writer...
I mean, in a dress.
I mean, in a dress.
I mean, is there something else that's satisfying?
I mean, is there something else that's satisfying?
I mean, there's nuclear power plants nearby.
I mean, there's nuclear power plants nearby.
I might want to write about myself.
I might want to write about myself.
I miss Walt.
I miss Walt.
I miss you too.
I miss you too.
I miss you.
I miss you.
I missed you all, and I couldn't wait to get back.
I missed you all, and I couldn't wait to get back.
I nearly fell asleep in his class today.
I nearly fell asleep in his class today.
I never get to.
I never get to.
I never needed a father!
I never needed a father!
I only wish that...
I only wish that...
I really miss you.
I really miss you.
I really wish I'd known you when you were 5.
I really wish I'd known you when you were 5.
I remember flying.
I remember flying.
I remember flying. I went flying with Daddy last week.
I remember flying. I went flying with Daddy last week.
I removed my undergarments and climbed on top of him.
I removed my undergarments and climbed on top of him.
I saved her boy's life.
I saved her boy's life.
I saw them go to school. I saw you go to work.
I saw them go to school. I saw you go to work.
I see a man with one arm.
I see a man with one arm.
I see a man with one leg.
I see a man with one leg.
I see.
I see.
I see. Bonkie bit Garp.
I see. Bonkie bit Garp.
I spend a lot of time imagining things. Part of my training as a writer.
I spend a lot of time imagining things. Part of my training as a writer.
I think I'm developing female intuition.
I think I'm developing female intuition.
I think it's a hideous thing that you've done.
I think it's a hideous thing that you've done.
I think so. Don't you?
I think so. Don't you?
I think we're still having fun.
I think we're still having fun.
I think you've been behaving very badly.
I think you've been behaving very badly.
I thought so.
I thought so.
I thought we were going to a movie.
I thought we were going to a movie.
I thought writing is supposed to be the writing.
I thought writing is supposed to be the writing.
I threw you up and down.
I threw you up and down.
I tip my head back like this and then like this...
I tip my head back like this and then like this...
I told you, he was a tail gunner in a plane.
I told you, he was a tail gunner in a plane.
I told you, the minute anyone found out about this, it was over.
I told you, the minute anyone found out about this, it was over.
I tried to look after her. I did.
I tried to look after her. I did.
I understand you'll be starting classes next semester.
I understand you'll be starting classes next semester.
I used to be Terribly Shy, but I changed.
I used to be Terribly Shy, but I changed.
I wanna be an artist, and I wanna know what you thought of it.
I wanna be an artist, and I wanna know what you thought of it.
I wanna get the hell out of here. I wanna go to New York...
I wanna get the hell out of here. I wanna go to New York...
I wanna take him and give him a shot.
I wanna take him and give him a shot.
I want another child, Garp.
I want another child, Garp.
I want it published.
I want it published.
I want my mother alive again.
I want my mother alive again.
I want to finish reading this story.
I want to finish reading this story.
I want to reverse that...
I want to reverse that...
I wanted a baby, but I didn't want to share my life in order to have one.
I wanted a baby, but I didn't want to share my life in order to have one.
I wanted a job, and I wanted to live alone.
I wanted a job, and I wanted to live alone.
I wanted to be a father myself.
I wanted to be a father myself.
I wanted to be here to deliver the baby.
I wanted to be here to deliver the baby.
I wanted to express an inner longing...
I wanted to express an inner longing...
I warn you, you'll be sorry you wrote this.
I warn you, you'll be sorry you wrote this.
I warned you about your book, Garp. The Ellen Jamesians are sending...
I warned you about your book, Garp. The Ellen Jamesians are sending...
I was a nurse.
I was a nurse.
I was a tight end with the Philadelphia Eagles.
I was a tight end with the Philadelphia Eagles.
I will never, ever write anything that lovely.
I will never, ever write anything that lovely.
I will not have her watching us. I am still a Catholic, believe it or not.
I will not have her watching us. I am still a Catholic, believe it or not.
I wish I had friends who wrote dreadful novels, novellas...
I wish I had friends who wrote dreadful novels, novellas...
I wish I had known you when you were 15.
I wish I had known you when you were 15.
I wish I was a girl. If I was a girl, I'd take off my clothes...
I wish I was a girl. If I was a girl, I'd take off my clothes...
I wish we grew up together as kids.
I wish we grew up together as kids.
I wish you wouldn't do this.
I wish you wouldn't do this.
I wish you'd reconsider.
I wish you'd reconsider.
I wouldn't worry about that. Helen can take care of herself.
I wouldn't worry about that. Helen can take care of herself.
I wrote about my life. You're a part of it.
I wrote about my life. You're a part of it.
I... I didn't know you knew.
I... I didn't know you knew.
I'd help her if I knew how, or even where she is, but I can't find out.
I'd help her if I knew how, or even where she is, but I can't find out.
I'll be able to say later on:
I'll be able to say later on:
I'll be glad to pay you.
I'll be glad to pay you.
I'll be right back.
I'll be right back.
I'll check out this class for you next week.
I'll check out this class for you next week.
I'll get you for this, Pritchard.
I'll get you for this, Pritchard.
I'll have to sit in on that one and let you know.
I'll have to sit in on that one and let you know.
I'll inoculate your jockstrap with bubonic plague.
I'll inoculate your jockstrap with bubonic plague.
I'll let him publish my book.
I'll let him publish my book.
I'll read it.
I'll read it.
I'll see you later.
I'll see you later.
I'll send you the book when I finish.
I'll send you the book when I finish.
I'll stay up and think weird thoughts for a while.
I'll stay up and think weird thoughts for a while.
I'll take that chance. You just publish it. Come on, Duncan.
I'll take that chance. You just publish it. Come on, Duncan.
I'll tell you honestly, son.
I'll tell you honestly, son.
I'm 30.
I'm 30.
I'm a hopeless romantic in a male chauvinist world.
I'm a hopeless romantic in a male chauvinist world.
I'm a nurse. I know. He died.
I'm a nurse. I know. He died.
I'm a nurse. It's about time I got back to it.
I'm a nurse. It's about time I got back to it.
I'm a trained nurse, and I plan to continue my work.
I'm a trained nurse, and I plan to continue my work.
I'm also a friend.
I'm also a friend.
I'm flying, Helen.
I'm flying, Helen.
I'm flying.
I'm flying.
I'm gaining on you, Helen.
I'm gaining on you, Helen.
I'm Garp.
I'm Garp.
I'm glad you're here.
I'm glad you're here.
I'm going on a cruise next Friday.
I'm going on a cruise next Friday.
I'm going to come up and get you. Stay very still.
I'm going to come up and get you. Stay very still.
I'm going to mourn her death alone for the rest of my life.
I'm going to mourn her death alone for the rest of my life.
I'm gonna die too. So will you.
I'm gonna die too. So will you.
I'm gonna start teaching again.
I'm gonna start teaching again.
I'm gonna take up hang gliding.
I'm gonna take up hang gliding.
I'm kind of glad you did too, Mom.
I'm kind of glad you did too, Mom.
I'm leaving. I'm going to New York to become a real writer.
I'm leaving. I'm going to New York to become a real writer.
I'm not sure I understand it.
I'm not sure I understand it.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm off to Florida.
I'm off to Florida.
I'm proud to publish it.
I'm proud to publish it.
I'm so sad.
I'm so sad.
I'm so, so sorry.
I'm so, so sorry.
I'm stuck at this all girls school. I thought I'd visit here...
I'm stuck at this all girls school. I thought I'd visit here...
I'm stunned myself. It upsets people.
I'm stunned myself. It upsets people.
I'm sure you'll do splendidly.
I'm sure you'll do splendidly.
I'm telling you now, either tie him up, make him behave...
I'm telling you now, either tie him up, make him behave...
I'm the one who's supposed to be crying.
I'm the one who's supposed to be crying.
I'm upset. She's my mother.
I'm upset. She's my mother.
I'm very, very proud of Mom.
I'm very, very proud of Mom.
I've always wanted you to.
I've always wanted you to.
I've been Jenny long enough.
I've been Jenny long enough.
I've been the one who gets introduced at these rallies.
I've been the one who gets introduced at these rallies.
I've been thinking we ought to leave myself.
I've been thinking we ought to leave myself.
I've been watching you...
I've been watching you...
I've delayed the campaign long enough.
I've delayed the campaign long enough.
I've got a right to stay!
I've got a right to stay!
I've got to do everything around here.
I've got to do everything around here.
I've got to go. It's late. Goodbye, darlings.
I've got to go. It's late. Goodbye, darlings.
I've got to kiss our baby.
I've got to kiss our baby.
I've got to see you one more time. I'm coming over. I'll be right there.
I've got to see you one more time. I'm coming over. I'll be right there.
I've got you, son, I've got you!
I've got you, son, I've got you!
I've heard quite enough. Thank you so much for your time.
I've heard quite enough. Thank you so much for your time.
I've never heard anything... Good night.
I've never heard anything... Good night.
If all the kids had trench mouth, would you want that too?
If all the kids had trench mouth, would you want that too?
If anyone finds out about this, it's over.
If anyone finds out about this, it's over.
If Daddy had Mommy, but he was a basketball player...
If Daddy had Mommy, but he was a basketball player...
If he was in a plane, he was a flier.
If he was in a plane, he was a flier.
If his children are crying, he just touches them, and they smile.
If his children are crying, he just touches them, and they smile.
If his wife is sad, he just touches her with his gloves, and she's happy.
If his wife is sad, he just touches her with his gloves, and she's happy.
If I could write, I'd feel better.
If I could write, I'd feel better.
If I could've had one by myself, I would have.
If I could've had one by myself, I would have.
If I do it, will you leave then?
If I do it, will you leave then?
If I ever meet the son of a bitch, I'll kill him.
If I ever meet the son of a bitch, I'll kill him.
If I marry anybody, it'll be a writer. But I doubt I'll marry anybody.
If I marry anybody, it'll be a writer. But I doubt I'll marry anybody.
If I'd known, I would've had some while I was still a man.
If I'd known, I would've had some while I was still a man.
If I'd only seen him a second, just a split second sooner...
If I'd only seen him a second, just a split second sooner...
If I'd seen the man with the gun...
If I'd seen the man with the gun...
If it's a girl...
If it's a girl...
If we could have just one more time...
If we could have just one more time...
If you don't smile, you'll never get a husband.
If you don't smile, you'll never get a husband.
If you expose my baby one more time to cheap shots like this...
If you expose my baby one more time to cheap shots like this...
If you're going to write about me and my personal life, wait till I'm dead.
If you're going to write about me and my personal life, wait till I'm dead.
In one way or another, we have all been suspect...
In one way or another, we have all been suspect...
In the land.
In the land.
In writing, it is writing. In publishing, it's timing.
In writing, it is writing. In publishing, it's timing.
Is Daddy writing again?
Is Daddy writing again?
Is it a home?
Is it a home?
Is that really true?
Is that really true?
Is that what you think?
Is that what you think?
Is that what you want?
Is that what you want?
Is there any word in the English language as sexy as that?
Is there any word in the English language as sexy as that?
Is this where you're keeping my Laurel?
Is this where you're keeping my Laurel?
Is your apartment clean?
Is your apartment clean?
Is your natural ability to piss people off.
Is your natural ability to piss people off.
Isn't this nice? Isn't this a beautiful street?
Isn't this nice? Isn't this a beautiful street?
It can be a real adventure...
It can be a real adventure...
It didn't take long, and that once was all that was needed.
It didn't take long, and that once was all that was needed.
It doesn't mean we have to give in to them.
It doesn't mean we have to give in to them.
It isn't. He says I make him feel sexually ambiguous.
It isn't. He says I make him feel sexually ambiguous.
It just plain...
It just plain...
It really has been an adventure.
It really has been an adventure.
It seems that most of you know who I am.
It seems that most of you know who I am.
It sounds like a flavor in a gay ice cream parlor.
It sounds like a flavor in a gay ice cream parlor.
It underlines the difference in our ages...
It underlines the difference in our ages...
It used to be Terribly Sexy, but I changed.
It used to be Terribly Sexy, but I changed.
It was cut off.
It was cut off.
It was fine.
It was fine.
It was just one of those days, Helen. I saw the kids get up.
It was just one of those days, Helen. I saw the kids get up.
It was then that I knew that he wouldn't last much longer.
It was then that I knew that he wouldn't last much longer.
It'll do such a job on you, you'll have nothing left to even scratch.
It'll do such a job on you, you'll have nothing left to even scratch.
It'll ruin your eyes, though.
It'll ruin your eyes, though.
It's a "she." And she's all right.
It's a "she." And she's all right.
It's a big lesbian scene.
It's a big lesbian scene.
It's a combination.
It's a combination.
It's a Gaelic musical competition.
It's a Gaelic musical competition.
It's a lovely place. Lovely.
It's a lovely place. Lovely.
It's a lower decker pecker checker.
It's a lower decker pecker checker.
It's a nightmare.
It's a nightmare.
It's a very nasty bump.
It's a very nasty bump.
It's about this little lame girl who runs across a beached blue whale...
It's about this little lame girl who runs across a beached blue whale...
It's all right, everyone.
It's all right, everyone.
It's all right, it's all right. Hold on. I'm going to put something on it.
It's all right, it's all right. Hold on. I'm going to put something on it.
It's an over the shoulder boulder holder.
It's an over the shoulder boulder holder.
It's awfully sad.
It's awfully sad.
It's been pre disastered. We're gonna be safe here.
It's been pre disastered. We're gonna be safe here.
It's close to the college where I'll be teaching.
It's close to the college where I'll be teaching.
It's dangerous stuff, and dangerous stuff sells.
It's dangerous stuff, and dangerous stuff sells.
It's distracting, isn't it?
It's distracting, isn't it?
It's easy. Dada.
It's easy. Dada.
It's for Frank, my husband.
It's for Frank, my husband.
It's going to be held at 5:00 tomorrow in New York.
It's going to be held at 5:00 tomorrow in New York.
It's gonna be called A Child's Christmas With A Whale.
It's gonna be called A Child's Christmas With A Whale.
It's gonna be hard to avoid being touched, isn't it?
It's gonna be hard to avoid being touched, isn't it?
It's hard to protect her in a crowd.
It's hard to protect her in a crowd.
It's her body. Why shouldn't she use it the way she wants to?
It's her body. Why shouldn't she use it the way she wants to?
It's just for women.
It's just for women.
It's just one of those raging hormonal attacks.
It's just one of those raging hormonal attacks.
It's kind of nice, actually.
It's kind of nice, actually.
It's like a dream.
It's like a dream.
It's like being underwater.
It's like being underwater.
It's like listening to a plant describe the motives of a mammal.
It's like listening to a plant describe the motives of a mammal.
It's lust.
It's lust.
It's my first short story. I wrote it for you.
It's my first short story. I wrote it for you.
It's my mother you want.
It's my mother you want.
It's nice in there. I know.
It's nice in there. I know.
It's not as exciting, but...
It's not as exciting, but...
It's not bad being old.
It's not bad being old.
It's not that small a town.
It's not that small a town.
It's our baby.
It's our baby.
It's really nice, you know? To look back...
It's really nice, you know? To look back...
It's sickening. Every bookstore in New York looks like this.
It's sickening. Every bookstore in New York looks like this.
It's stuck.
It's stuck.
It's the saddest story I have ever read.
It's the saddest story I have ever read.
It's their right to do what they want.
It's their right to do what they want.
It's time to die, Sir Scum. I'm going to revenge my uncle's death.
It's time to die, Sir Scum. I'm going to revenge my uncle's death.
It's...
It's...
It's...
It's...
Jeffrey.
Jeffrey.
Jenny Fields!"
Jenny Fields!"
Jenny!
Jenny!
Jenny! In the war, which side was he on?
Jenny! In the war, which side was he on?
Jenny! Jenny! Jenny!
Jenny! Jenny! Jenny!
Jenny's doing all she can. We're taking the case to court.
Jenny's doing all she can. We're taking the case to court.
Jenny's voice has been silenced.
Jenny's voice has been silenced.
Jump! Jump! Go ahead and jump!
Jump! Jump! Go ahead and jump!
Just don't "Rachel" me.
Just don't "Rachel" me.
Just don't go in over your knees.
Just don't go in over your knees.
Just Ellen, and that's it.
Just Ellen, and that's it.
Just Garp. That's the whole thing.
Just Garp. That's the whole thing.
Just lay off me.
Just lay off me.
Just like our house. I work...
Just like our house. I work...
Just one of my gradual students.
Just one of my gradual students.
Just plain caught him.
Just plain caught him.
Just the ticket for young marrieds.
Just the ticket for young marrieds.
Keep an eye on your daughter, coach.
Keep an eye on your daughter, coach.
Kill them. Kill them.
Kill them. Kill them.
Know what really gets my goat? That she wrote about me.
Know what really gets my goat? That she wrote about me.
Laurel!
Laurel!
Laurel!
Laurel!
Laurel!
Laurel!
Laurel! You in there, you bitch?
Laurel! You in there, you bitch?
Laurel's here, but we're not exactly keeping her.
Laurel's here, but we're not exactly keeping her.
Let go. Let...
Let go. Let...
Let's get him, Garp.
Let's get him, Garp.
Let's go look at the kids.
Let's go look at the kids.
Let's go look at the kids.
Let's go look at the kids.
Let's go, boys. Everybody back inside.
Let's go, boys. Everybody back inside.
Let's go, Chris. Set up on the base line, the base line.
Let's go, Chris. Set up on the base line, the base line.
Let's go, set up number four. Okay, number four.
Let's go, set up number four. Okay, number four.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Let's go. Ready?
Let's go. Ready?
Listen, goddamn it! If you don't get Laurel's ass out here, I'm gonna...
Listen, goddamn it! If you don't get Laurel's ass out here, I'm gonna...
Listen.
Listen.
Long Ranger died.
Long Ranger died.
Look around you!
Look around you!
Loved it.
Loved it.
Make it easy on yourself. Don't be a baby, Duncan. Say "Dada."
Make it easy on yourself. Don't be a baby, Duncan. Say "Dada."
Make it fly, Dad. Come on. We want to fly.
Make it fly, Dad. Come on. We want to fly.
Make something up, then.
Make something up, then.
Mama.
Mama.
Mama. Say "Mama."
Mama. Say "Mama."
Married? She never even met the son of a bitch.
Married? She never even met the son of a bitch.
Maybe he didn't die.
Maybe he didn't die.
Maybe I could write there too.
Maybe I could write there too.
Maybe my father didn't really die either.
Maybe my father didn't really die either.
Maybe things will change.
Maybe things will change.
Maybe, but you also want to get at the Ellen Jamesians.
Maybe, but you also want to get at the Ellen Jamesians.
Maybe.
Maybe.
Me too.
Me too.
Me too.
Me too.
Men die young in my family, Helen.
Men die young in my family, Helen.
Michael Milton.
Michael Milton.
Michael.
Michael.
Miss Fields.
Miss Fields.
Miss Fields.
Miss Fields.
Mm hm.
Mm hm.
Mm hm.
Mm hm.
Mm, 30.
Mm, 30.
Mom, I don't want to hear about this shit!
Mom, I don't want to hear about this shit!
Mom, it's very simple.
Mom, it's very simple.
Mom, you didn't write about me, did you?
Mom, you didn't write about me, did you?
Mom!
Mom!
Mom!
Mom!
Mom!
Mom!
Mom! Mom!
Mom! Mom!
Mom?
Mom?
Mom.
Mom.
Mom. Mom.
Mom. Mom.
Monkey in the middle.
Monkey in the middle.
Move in, Joey. Come on.
Move in, Joey. Come on.
Mr. Holm, you have a daughter. I have a son.
Mr. Holm, you have a daughter. I have a son.
Mr. Holm?
Mr. Holm?
My daughter got knocked up by a Garp.
My daughter got knocked up by a Garp.
My father was a flier.
My father was a flier.
My father wore a helmet. He was a flier.
My father wore a helmet. He was a flier.
My husband doesn't putter. He's a writer.
My husband doesn't putter. He's a writer.
My life, once I've experienced enough.
My life, once I've experienced enough.
My mother's paying for it. She's become a firm these days.
My mother's paying for it. She's become a firm these days.
My name is T.S. Garp.
My name is T.S. Garp.
My parents died. Your father died. Everybody dies.
My parents died. Your father died. Everybody dies.
My teeth fall out and my hair turn gray.
My teeth fall out and my hair turn gray.
Nineteen?
Nineteen?
No glove, no love.
No glove, no love.
No last fucks for the road. On the phone!
No last fucks for the road. On the phone!
No point taking Donaldson's class. That's a real bore.
No point taking Donaldson's class. That's a real bore.
No sense making things any worse than they are.
No sense making things any worse than they are.
No, because they dribble before they shoot.
No, because they dribble before they shoot.
No, I didn't.
No, I didn't.
No, I mean they don't have any tongues.
No, I mean they don't have any tongues.
No, I wanna ask her about something.
No, I wanna ask her about something.
No, I'm retiring.
No, I'm retiring.
No, I'm sorry.
No, I'm sorry.
No, it wasn't. It was a bore.
No, it wasn't. It was a bore.
No, let go. Give this to me.
No, let go. Give this to me.
No, Mom, I've got a lot of sympathy for a girl who gets ****d.
No, Mom, I've got a lot of sympathy for a girl who gets ****d.
No, Mom. What? She's taken a vow of frowns or something?
No, Mom. What? She's taken a vow of frowns or something?
No, not 17.
No, not 17.
No, this is the last year that I'll be coaching.
No, this is the last year that I'll be coaching.
No, you don't. That Cushie could use a good sport herself.
No, you don't. That Cushie could use a good sport herself.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No. No, I don't. I'll tell you what I want.
No. No, I don't. I'll tell you what I want.
No. Not at all. If I do, I'll start again.
No. Not at all. If I do, I'll start again.
Nobody is buying my novel. I'm starting my second...
Nobody is buying my novel. I'm starting my second...
None of your business.
None of your business.
Nope.
Nope.
Not as well as you.
Not as well as you.
Not because I'm afraid...
Not because I'm afraid...
Not here.
Not here.
Not really.
Not really.
Not the bastard son of Jenny Fields? Oh, I loved your mother's book!
Not the bastard son of Jenny Fields? Oh, I loved your mother's book!
Not to me, it's not.
Not to me, it's not.
Not when I'm working. Oh, sometimes.
Not when I'm working. Oh, sometimes.
Now all we need is some butter, some milk...
Now all we need is some butter, some milk...
Now you don't have a father either.
Now you don't have a father either.
Now, carefully, give me your foot.
Now, carefully, give me your foot.
Now, hold on to it.
Now, hold on to it.
Now, you're supposed to attack me and pull my clothes off.
Now, you're supposed to attack me and pull my clothes off.
Number 90? Robert Muldoon?
Number 90? Robert Muldoon?
Of course I do.
Of course I do.
Of course you can tell me what happened.
Of course you can tell me what happened.
Of course you can, darling.
Of course you can, darling.
Of course, I can't.
Of course, I can't.
Of course, yeah.
Of course, yeah.
Off the face, off the face.
Off the face, off the face.
Oh, boy, did they.
Oh, boy, did they.
Oh, boy!
Oh, boy!
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
Oh, don't cry.
Oh, don't cry.
Oh, Duncan!
Oh, Duncan!
Oh, fuck!
Oh, fuck!
Oh, Garp.
Oh, Garp.
Oh, God, please!
Oh, God, please!
Oh, God!
Oh, God!
Oh, God!
Oh, God!
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, good for her!
Oh, good for her!
Oh, Helen...
Oh, Helen...
Oh, I can't hear a damn... Where'd she go?
Oh, I can't hear a damn... Where'd she go?
Oh, I don't know.
Oh, I don't know.
Oh, I just finished reading your novel. I think it's wonderful. I adored it.
Oh, I just finished reading your novel. I think it's wonderful. I adored it.
Oh, I know who you are.
Oh, I know who you are.
Oh, Jesus Christ. That really...
Oh, Jesus Christ. That really...
Oh, listen. I know...
Oh, listen. I know...
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, that's great. I mean, thank you.
Oh, that's great. I mean, thank you.
Oh, Ulysses.
Oh, Ulysses.
Oh, Walt, isn't this lovely? Look at him.
Oh, Walt, isn't this lovely? Look at him.
Oh, what the hell.
Oh, what the hell.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yes.
Oh, yes.
Oh, you're an Ellen Jamesian. Thank...
Oh, you're an Ellen Jamesian. Thank...
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Gradual school is where you gradually find out...
Oh. Gradual school is where you gradually find out...
Oh. Oh.
Oh. Oh.
Oh. Oh.
Oh. Oh.
Oh. You mean rubbers.
Oh. You mean rubbers.
Okay, call you when we get home.
Okay, call you when we get home.
Okay, Duncan. Come on. Come on.
Okay, Duncan. Come on. Come on.
Okay, gentlemen, that's it. Hit the showers.
Okay, gentlemen, that's it. Hit the showers.
Okay, let's get back on defense!
Okay, let's get back on defense!
Okay, we've got a big meet tomorrow, so no beating the meat tonight.
Okay, we've got a big meet tomorrow, so no beating the meat tonight.
Old as the hills.
Old as the hills.
Old man Walt.
Old man Walt.
On the whale, but I did the rest.
On the whale, but I did the rest.
Once they take the stitches out of his tongue and unwire his jaw.
Once they take the stitches out of his tongue and unwire his jaw.
One day, they brought in a tail gunner...
One day, they brought in a tail gunner...
One night, when he had one of his usual erections...
One night, when he had one of his usual erections...
One of my students brought you up in class today.
One of my students brought you up in class today.
One of them even called it a novella instead of a short story.
One of them even called it a novella instead of a short story.
Only in your apartment.
Only in your apartment.
Or fast on your way to becoming one or the other."
Or fast on your way to becoming one or the other."
Or I'll make him dead as a doornail.
Or I'll make him dead as a doornail.
Or somebody's whore...
Or somebody's whore...
Our new wrestling coach is named Holm. What a hard ass.
Our new wrestling coach is named Holm. What a hard ass.
Our youth is gone, isn't it?
Our youth is gone, isn't it?
Pardon me.
Pardon me.
Pardon me. My name is Jenny Fields. Are you a prostitute?
Pardon me. My name is Jenny Fields. Are you a prostitute?
People used her. They took her life away.
People used her. They took her life away.
Period!
Period!
Please?
Please?
Please?
Please?
Please. Silence, please!
Please. Silence, please!
Pleased to meet you. One fifty eight. On my way to 147.
Pleased to meet you. One fifty eight. On my way to 147.
Pooh, would you smile, damn it?
Pooh, would you smile, damn it?
Pooh?
Pooh?
Pooh.
Pooh.
Poor Garp.
Poor Garp.
Poor kid. She not only has to hide...
Poor kid. She not only has to hide...
Practically a whole window to yourself. How about that?
Practically a whole window to yourself. How about that?
Pretending to be his dead father.
Pretending to be his dead father.
Pretty clean.
Pretty clean.
Pritchard, give me that!
Pritchard, give me that!
Promise.
Promise.
Randy!
Randy!
Really?
Really?
Really? What will you be going out for?
Really? What will you be going out for?
Really? What's he like?
Really? What's he like?
Remember Chicago? Do you?
Remember Chicago? Do you?
Remember these, Rachel? Do you?
Remember these, Rachel? Do you?
Remember.
Remember.
Reverse him! Roll him!
Reverse him! Roll him!
Reviewers took her to pieces. They said wonderful things about yours.
Reviewers took her to pieces. They said wonderful things about yours.
Right? Right?
Right? Right?
Said the only word other than his name that I ever heard him utter.
Said the only word other than his name that I ever heard him utter.
Same man, the bottom.
Same man, the bottom.
Say "Dada." Say it, say it.
Say "Dada." Say it, say it.
Say "Duncan."
Say "Duncan."
Say hi to your baby sister.
Say hi to your baby sister.
See you, Garp.
See you, Garp.
Seemed like a good way to have one without the bother of a husband...
Seemed like a good way to have one without the bother of a husband...
She can't bear to have a man's hand touching her.
She can't bear to have a man's hand touching her.
She doesn't want anyone to know what she looks like now or where she is.
She doesn't want anyone to know what she looks like now or where she is.
She has no tongue.
She has no tongue.
She is going to be very, very rich and very, very famous.
She is going to be very, very rich and very, very famous.
She never felt it. Not even once.
She never felt it. Not even once.
She scared the hell out of me once...
She scared the hell out of me once...
She seemed to have a pretty good head on her shoulders.
She seemed to have a pretty good head on her shoulders.
She sent me a picture of herself.
She sent me a picture of herself.
She struck a chord women wanted to hear.
She struck a chord women wanted to hear.
She teaches kids that go to gradual school.
She teaches kids that go to gradual school.
She wants to name her Jenny.
She wants to name her Jenny.
She was our home...
She was our home...
She was our mother.
She was our mother.
She's a wonderful person.
She's a wonderful person.
She's got the hiccups.
She's got the hiccups.
She's hurt, and you're hurt.
She's hurt, and you're hurt.
She's in Dirckson's Drama Through the Ages.
She's in Dirckson's Drama Through the Ages.
She's just a quiet little girl.
She's just a quiet little girl.
She's not the type to appreciate literature.
She's not the type to appreciate literature.
She's timely.
She's timely.
Should be here in about seven and a half months.
Should be here in about seven and a half months.
Sick.
Sick.
Silence in the house!
Silence in the house!
Sir Scum manages to crawl forth...
Sir Scum manages to crawl forth...
Sleep well.
Sleep well.
Slowly take your foot out of the gutter.
Slowly take your foot out of the gutter.
Smile, Cushie. That's right. Now, come on, Pooh, smile.
Smile, Cushie. That's right. Now, come on, Pooh, smile.
So he takes off the gloves, and he dies.
So he takes off the gloves, and he dies.
So how do you know you're going to be a writer?
So how do you know you're going to be a writer?
So I'm trying to clean it up a bit.
So I'm trying to clean it up a bit.
So it's up to us to look out for them.
So it's up to us to look out for them.
So sad.
So sad.
So sad.
So sad.
So smile and look merry.
So smile and look merry.
So that win or lose...
So that win or lose...
Some authority she is.
Some authority she is.
Some defect in our femininity with our brains.
Some defect in our femininity with our brains.
Some of these women formed a society in her honor.
Some of these women formed a society in her honor.
Something to cushion the fall!
Something to cushion the fall!
Son of a bitch!
Son of a bitch!
Son of a bitch! He bit your earlobe off.
Son of a bitch! He bit your earlobe off.
Sorry about that.
Sorry about that.
Sorry about that. We have to end the war...
Sorry about that. We have to end the war...
Sorry.
Sorry.
Sound the charge.
Sound the charge.
Sounds like a fish.
Sounds like a fish.
Stay off your back. Ten seconds. Hold him.
Stay off your back. Ten seconds. Hold him.
Stay, Bonkie, stay. That's a good dog.
Stay, Bonkie, stay. That's a good dog.
Stephen! Stephen!
Stephen! Stephen!
Strangers can come between us.
Strangers can come between us.
Strangers.
Strangers.
Strawberry Swirl, Chock full of Chocolate...
Strawberry Swirl, Chock full of Chocolate...
T.S. Garp?
T.S. Garp?
Take care.
Take care.
Take him down!
Take him down!
Take over what?
Take over what?
Ten seconds!
Ten seconds!
Ten seconds!
Ten seconds!
Terribly Sad.
Terribly Sad.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thanks a lot.
Thanks a lot.
Thanks.
Thanks.
That also made me a sexual suspect.
That also made me a sexual suspect.
That guy has been terrorizing this neighborhood for years.
That guy has been terrorizing this neighborhood for years.
That made me a sexual suspect.
That made me a sexual suspect.
That means they do have kids, right?
That means they do have kids, right?
That must be the babysitter. I'll get it.
That must be the babysitter. I'll get it.
That my mother's book has been translated into Apache.
That my mother's book has been translated into Apache.
That really gets me.
That really gets me.
That son of a bitch ran the same stop sign.
That son of a bitch ran the same stop sign.
That was a dreadful film.
That was a dreadful film.
That wasn't fair. You said I couldn't write about you.
That wasn't fair. You said I couldn't write about you.
That way your armor will fit!
That way your armor will fit!
That way, I could see you flat chested and watch you as your breasts grew.
That way, I could see you flat chested and watch you as your breasts grew.
That we won't be able to continue.
That we won't be able to continue.
That you don't want to go to school anymore.
That you don't want to go to school anymore.
That's a babysitter?
That's a babysitter?
That's a beautiful name.
That's a beautiful name.
That's a good boy. Take it out.
That's a good boy. Take it out.
That's all right, I can drive. You just never let me.
That's all right, I can drive. You just never let me.
That's all you men understand, is violence.
That's all you men understand, is violence.
That's catchy.
That's catchy.
That's how small this town is.
That's how small this town is.
That's it.
That's it.
That's it. Good move.
That's it. Good move.
That's it. I will see you Tuesday.
That's it. I will see you Tuesday.
That's my baby's name.
That's my baby's name.
That's no way for the son of a nurse to behave.
That's no way for the son of a nurse to behave.
That's not fair. I showed you mine. You should show me yours.
That's not fair. I showed you mine. You should show me yours.
That's right.
That's right.
That's right. Garp.
That's right. Garp.
That's silly.
That's silly.
That's two, two there!
That's two, two there!
That's two!
That's two!
That's two!
That's two!
That's wonderful. Oh, I'm so happy.
That's wonderful. Oh, I'm so happy.
The all American bod.
The all American bod.
The cruise was a disaster, anyway.
The cruise was a disaster, anyway.
The doctor says he'll be fine...
The doctor says he'll be fine...
The men of America will soon find out what that means.
The men of America will soon find out what that means.
The more the wind blows, the more you can let out.
The more the wind blows, the more you can let out.
The only thing you've inherited from your mother...
The only thing you've inherited from your mother...
The residents are mostly kids who can't look out for themselves.
The residents are mostly kids who can't look out for themselves.
The terrible, the ugly...
The terrible, the ugly...
The text is dull, and Stewart Percy is even duller.
The text is dull, and Stewart Percy is even duller.
The thing is to have a life before we die.
The thing is to have a life before we die.
The thing that's really hard is that I'd love to have kids.
The thing that's really hard is that I'd love to have kids.
The undertow! Be careful of the undertow!
The undertow! Be careful of the undertow!
The woman I'm supporting would make a damn fine president...
The woman I'm supporting would make a damn fine president...
The women in the society have their tongues cut off...
The women in the society have their tongues cut off...
The women of America, hungry for a heroine...
The women of America, hungry for a heroine...
The word "home" keeps coming up, but it doesn't sound the same anymore.
The word "home" keeps coming up, but it doesn't sound the same anymore.
Then get in the car with me.
Then get in the car with me.
Then the kids and I played this great game with Roberta.
Then the kids and I played this great game with Roberta.
Then we talked about the fact that I have never written a Christmas story.
Then we talked about the fact that I have never written a Christmas story.
There are a lot of sick people out there.
There are a lot of sick people out there.
There could've been kids playing there. A pregnant woman.
There could've been kids playing there. A pregnant woman.
There still are men who would hurt her.
There still are men who would hurt her.
There was a stop sign there, right?
There was a stop sign there, right?
There was a voice...
There was a voice...
There. I've had two glasses of champagne.
There. I've had two glasses of champagne.
There's another kid I'm sure you're gonna like too.
There's another kid I'm sure you're gonna like too.
There's been enough violence.
There's been enough violence.
There's blood on the porch. Blood everywhere.
There's blood on the porch. Blood everywhere.
There's crazy drivers everywhere.
There's crazy drivers everywhere.
They cut off her tongue so she wouldn't tell...
They cut off her tongue so she wouldn't tell...
They had a crisis.
They had a crisis.
They loved it.
They loved it.
They started talking about Magic Gloves.
They started talking about Magic Gloves.
They took a vote and decided to continue.
They took a vote and decided to continue.
They're coming!
They're coming!
They're furious at you. I know these women.
They're furious at you. I know these women.
They're gonna have an Ellen James Society, and Ellen James is against it?
They're gonna have an Ellen James Society, and Ellen James is against it?
They've done lovely things here with the lawn.
They've done lovely things here with the lawn.
Thinking about everything.
Thinking about everything.
Thirty.
Thirty.
This Ellen James Society doesn't speak, as if they had no tongues?
This Ellen James Society doesn't speak, as if they had no tongues?
This house is full of them!
This house is full of them!
This is going to be a real family project.
This is going to be a real family project.
This is good enough for me.
This is good enough for me.
This is one course you won't be taking.
This is one course you won't be taking.
This is some date.
This is some date.
This is what happens when you become rich and famous. That's why I avoided it.
This is what happens when you become rich and famous. That's why I avoided it.
This is what you had in mind all along.
This is what you had in mind all along.
This means that we have to follow the speed limit.
This means that we have to follow the speed limit.
This one hopes that I'll get gangbanged by the Oakland Raiders.
This one hopes that I'll get gangbanged by the Oakland Raiders.
This particular literature course.
This particular literature course.
This picture is going to all our friends this year.
This picture is going to all our friends this year.
This sure is fun, Dad.
This sure is fun, Dad.
Tie him up underneath. That's it, that's it.
Tie him up underneath. That's it, that's it.
Time out. Time out. Just five.
Time out. Time out. Just five.
To hell with that.
To hell with that.
To protest what happened to Ellen James.
To protest what happened to Ellen James.
To tell you the truth, I've never given the matter much thought, but...
To tell you the truth, I've never given the matter much thought, but...
Toad? What toad?
Toad? What toad?
Two men ****d her when she was 11 years old.
Two men ****d her when she was 11 years old.
Two weeks, to Club Med.
Two weeks, to Club Med.
Two! Two there.
Two! Two there.
Uh huh.
Uh huh.
Uh...
Uh...
Under general anesthesia.
Under general anesthesia.
Undertoad!
Undertoad!
Unless it's a wrestler who's also a writer.
Unless it's a wrestler who's also a writer.
Until one day, all he could say was part of his name, "Arp."
Until one day, all he could say was part of his name, "Arp."
Very bright, but young.
Very bright, but young.
Wait! Wait!
Wait! Wait!
Walt gets to do the illustrations.
Walt gets to do the illustrations.
Walt had a cold this morning. He should be home.
Walt had a cold this morning. He should be home.
Walt thinks there's a big toad under the water.
Walt thinks there's a big toad under the water.
Walt!
Walt!
Walt?
Walt?
Was he real big?
Was he real big?
Watch out for the undertow!
Watch out for the undertow!
Watch out!
Watch out!
We are civilized people, and civilized people obey rules.
We are civilized people, and civilized people obey rules.
We are now orphans.
We are now orphans.
We can't have you parading around like a savage from Borneo.
We can't have you parading around like a savage from Borneo.
We have been suspect as the weaker sex.
We have been suspect as the weaker sex.
We haven't had any strangers, but, I mean...
We haven't had any strangers, but, I mean...
We need you here. There's a lot of healing yet to be done.
We need you here. There's a lot of healing yet to be done.
We should invite her over next weekend.
We should invite her over next weekend.
We should've stayed in Chicago.
We should've stayed in Chicago.
We will continue.
We will continue.
We'll be home later, if we come home at all.
We'll be home later, if we come home at all.
We'll go look at the kids when they're asleep.
We'll go look at the kids when they're asleep.
We'll go someplace where we can get a cup of coffee, get warm and talk.
We'll go someplace where we can get a cup of coffee, get warm and talk.
We'll just have to unzip you.
We'll just have to unzip you.
We're gonna stay here and look at the kids.
We're gonna stay here and look at the kids.
We're neither little nor weak, but a force to be dealt with!
We're neither little nor weak, but a force to be dealt with!
We're on our way now to enter him in a sport.
We're on our way now to enter him in a sport.
We're taking you to a hospital in Boston.
We're taking you to a hospital in Boston.
We've been here long enough.
We've been here long enough.
We've got oranges, fruits and vegetables.
We've got oranges, fruits and vegetables.
Well, come on inside. I'll take you upstairs.
Well, come on inside. I'll take you upstairs.
Well, do you?
Well, do you?
Well, I don't want to be the granny around the house.
Well, I don't want to be the granny around the house.
Well, I zipped it up too fast, and it got caught.
Well, I zipped it up too fast, and it got caught.
Well, I'll call you.
Well, I'll call you.
Well, what was the verdict?
Well, what was the verdict?
Well, you know how I feel about them.
Well, you know how I feel about them.
Well, you're not.
Well, you're not.
Well?
Well?
Well?
Well?
Well...
Well...
Well...
Well...
Were you aware of what was going on out here?
Were you aware of what was going on out here?
What a bod.
What a bod.
What a bod. This, gentlemen, is a bod.
What a bod. This, gentlemen, is a bod.
What a day.
What a day.
What a day.
What a day.
What are you doing awake?
What are you doing awake?
What are you? The man of the house, or the court eunuch?
What are you? The man of the house, or the court eunuch?
What can I do?
What can I do?
What did that bastard son of yours do to my dog?
What did that bastard son of yours do to my dog?
What do you coach?
What do you coach?
What do you mean, I can't go? I'm her son.
What do you mean, I can't go? I'm her son.
What do you think, Helen?
What do you think, Helen?
What does the T.S. stand for?
What does the T.S. stand for?
What going on out here?
What going on out here?
What happened happened.
What happened happened.
What is it?
What is it?
What shall I take?
What shall I take?
What strangers?
What strangers?
What the hell does she know about lust?
What the hell does she know about lust?
What the hell is Global Development Studies?
What the hell is Global Development Studies?
What the hell. Go.
What the hell. Go.
What the hell's the matter with you?
What the hell's the matter with you?
What was he doing up there?
What was he doing up there?
What was that all about?
What was that all about?
What was that all about? New constitution?
What was that all about? New constitution?
What, my love?
What, my love?
What?
What?
What's gradual school?
What's gradual school?
What's the matter, Roberta?
What's the matter, Roberta?
What's the matter, Walt?
What's the matter, Walt?
What's the matter?
What's the matter?
What's the matter?
What's the matter?
When I'm old and gray, I probably won't remember my past.
When I'm old and gray, I probably won't remember my past.
When we showed intelligence, we were suspect of covering up...
When we showed intelligence, we were suspect of covering up...
When we showed strength, we were suspect as not being weak enough.
When we showed strength, we were suspect as not being weak enough.
When you were born, I was so happy...
When you were born, I was so happy...
When?
When?
Where are we going?
Where are we going?
Where did you get this?
Where did you get this?
Where to?
Where to?
While I'm alive, the subject belongs to me.
While I'm alive, the subject belongs to me.
Who had legal rights to my body. So one night when I was on duty...
Who had legal rights to my body. So one night when I was on duty...
Who they were or what they looked like.
Who they were or what they looked like.
Who'd been wounded by antiaircraft in a raid over Germany.
Who'd been wounded by antiaircraft in a raid over Germany.
Who's Mommy talking to?
Who's Mommy talking to?
Who's that?
Who's that?
Whoever made this dreadful film is a friend of mine.
Whoever made this dreadful film is a friend of mine.
Whom.
Whom.
Why can't a basketball player father a child?
Why can't a basketball player father a child?
Why can't basketball players father a child?
Why can't basketball players father a child?
Why can't basketball players have kids?
Why can't basketball players have kids?
Why can't I decide what sport to take?
Why can't I decide what sport to take?
Why couldn't he have kids?
Why couldn't he have kids?
Why dirty?
Why dirty?
Why do you think men like you?
Why do you think men like you?
Will you cut that shit out?!
Will you cut that shit out?!
Will you knock it off?
Will you knock it off?
Will you throw me in the air like you used to?
Will you throw me in the air like you used to?
Winifred.
Winifred.
With him. He's a publisher. He looks like a nice man.
With him. He's a publisher. He looks like a nice man.
With his last dying breath...
With his last dying breath...
With snow inside of them.
With snow inside of them.
With the election day so close...
With the election day so close...
With whom is your appointment, Mother?
With whom is your appointment, Mother?
Would you like that?
Would you like that?
Wrestling...
Wrestling...
Yeah, 5.
Yeah, 5.
Yeah, and you know who lives underwater.
Yeah, and you know who lives underwater.
Yeah, but I don't want reviews. I want an audience. A big audience.
Yeah, but I don't want reviews. I want an audience. A big audience.
Yeah, real. He's very young.
Yeah, real. He's very young.
Yeah, she is.
Yeah, she is.
Yeah?
Yeah?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. Mom says...
Yeah. Mom says...
Yeah. Well, that wasn't death.
Yeah. Well, that wasn't death.
Yes, he did.
Yes, he did.
Yes, he is. I'll get him.
Yes, he is. I'll get him.
Yes, I just imagine what you'd be like without it.
Yes, I just imagine what you'd be like without it.
Yes, it is. That's why she's here. My name's Roberta.
Yes, it is. That's why she's here. My name's Roberta.
Yes, it's about time we had another one.
Yes, it's about time we had another one.
Yes, Milton.
Yes, Milton.
Yes, my love.
Yes, my love.
Yes, my love.
Yes, my love.
Yes, there is.
Yes, there is.
Yes, what is it you want?
Yes, what is it you want?
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes. And you're supposed to say, "Every night you have a headache."
Yes. And you're supposed to say, "Every night you have a headache."
Yes. For Valentine's Day, you can have one with a heart.
Yes. For Valentine's Day, you can have one with a heart.
Yes. T.S. Garp.
Yes. T.S. Garp.
Yes. The society...
Yes. The society...
Yes. Yes, it is.
Yes. Yes, it is.
You asshole.
You asshole.
You broke up with Marge too late.
You broke up with Marge too late.
You call him, and you say, "Goodbye." On the phone.
You call him, and you say, "Goodbye." On the phone.
You call him, Helen.
You call him, Helen.
You can have cake and ice cream and don't have to worry about cavities.
You can have cake and ice cream and don't have to worry about cavities.
You can order a nice glass eye...
You can order a nice glass eye...
You can talk.
You can talk.
You can't! Michael!
You can't! Michael!
You can't. Someone has to rescue the fair maiden.
You can't. Someone has to rescue the fair maiden.
You didn't say it was a joke.
You didn't say it was a joke.
You do that when you're old and gray.
You do that when you're old and gray.
You do what you want to do or what you have to do, I guess.
You do what you want to do or what you have to do, I guess.
You don't have a father. You're a bastard.
You don't have a father. You're a bastard.
You don't usually find homes quite this lovely in this quiet a location.
You don't usually find homes quite this lovely in this quiet a location.
You have a fine reputation as a writer of serious fiction. This is serious stuff.
You have a fine reputation as a writer of serious fiction. This is serious stuff.
You have one hell of a way of making converts to civilization.
You have one hell of a way of making converts to civilization.
You have to leave now.
You have to leave now.
You just seem like the only normal person around the place.
You just seem like the only normal person around the place.
You just want to make trouble.
You just want to make trouble.
You know what I really love, though?
You know what I really love, though?
You know what men are like. Full of lust.
You know what men are like. Full of lust.
You know why Santa Claus can't father a child?
You know why Santa Claus can't father a child?
You know, everybody dies.
You know, everybody dies.
You know, sometimes you can have a whole lifetime in a day...
You know, sometimes you can have a whole lifetime in a day...
You know, undertoad.
You know, undertoad.
You look wonderful. Helen. Hello, dear.
You look wonderful. Helen. Hello, dear.
You mean they actually have their own tongues cut off?
You mean they actually have their own tongues cut off?
You might have seen me.
You might have seen me.
You must be so proud of your mother.
You must be so proud of your mother.
You Neolithic dipshit!
You Neolithic dipshit!
You ****d a dying man.
You ****d a dying man.
You ****d him.
You ****d him.
You really want to have sex with her.
You really want to have sex with her.
You said you'd only marry a real writer.
You said you'd only marry a real writer.
You see, a stranger has come between us.
You see, a stranger has come between us.
You see, it's going to be the first feminist memorial funeral.
You see, it's going to be the first feminist memorial funeral.
You started it, now be a man and leave.
You started it, now be a man and leave.
You sure like trouble, don't you?
You sure like trouble, don't you?
You sure read a lot.
You sure read a lot.
You sure?
You sure?
You think you're the only one around here with a broken heart?
You think you're the only one around here with a broken heart?
You walked right into that fireman's, Garp. Come on!
You walked right into that fireman's, Garp. Come on!
You want that, go to Eighth Avenue.
You want that, go to Eighth Avenue.
You'd better rest.
You'd better rest.
You'll be old too someday.
You'll be old too someday.
You'll get to see my breasts sag...
You'll get to see my breasts sag...
You'll write, and you'll marry Helen, and she'll read.
You'll write, and you'll marry Helen, and she'll read.
You're a disgrace to your tribe.
You're a disgrace to your tribe.
You're a little short on sympathy, son.
You're a little short on sympathy, son.
You're a publisher, John, not a critic. You just publish it.
You're a publisher, John, not a critic. You just publish it.
You're a wonderful writer.
You're a wonderful writer.
You're about to burst.
You're about to burst.
You're done with school.
You're done with school.
You're Ellen James?
You're Ellen James?
You're out of bounds.
You're out of bounds.
You're reading another writer in my bed. That's adultery.
You're reading another writer in my bed. That's adultery.
You're so dumb. It's a joke.
You're so dumb. It's a joke.
You're supposed to come to a full stop. Right?
You're supposed to come to a full stop. Right?
You're supposed to stop.
You're supposed to stop.
You're too big for that now.
You're too big for that now.
You're wounded. As soon as you're wounded, you become a villain.
You're wounded. As soon as you're wounded, you become a villain.
You've been doing your homework, teacher.
You've been doing your homework, teacher.
You've been hammering at me since we got on the plane.
You've been hammering at me since we got on the plane.
You've been sleeping with Marge Tallworth.
You've been sleeping with Marge Tallworth.
You've got a long life ahead.
You've got a long life ahead.
You've got the wrong house, and the wrong guy. My name is Garp.
You've got the wrong house, and the wrong guy. My name is Garp.
You've got to be young when you do it.
You've got to be young when you do it.
Young, maybe.
Young, maybe.
Young.
Young.
Your blaming her isn't going to change that.
Your blaming her isn't going to change that.
Your daddy used to draw.
Your daddy used to draw.
Your mother gets even worse than these.
Your mother gets even worse than these.
Your novel is as good a first novel as I've read.
Your novel is as good a first novel as I've read.
A shot will do that? It will. He'll be dead.
A shot will do that? It will. He'll be dead.
A turkey for Thanksgiving? If you insist.
A turkey for Thanksgiving? If you insist.
About what? I want to ask her about lust!
About what? I want to ask her about lust!
After all, it's only natural. Diseases are natural too.
After all, it's only natural. Diseases are natural too.
Ah! Stop it! Go away, Bonkers!
Ah! Stop it! Go away, Bonkers!
Alice, dear, it's all right, darling. He touched me!
Alice, dear, it's all right, darling. He touched me!
All right, over here, let's go. Get the rebound!
All right, over here, let's go. Get the rebound!
Am I disturbing you? I think you like to disturb me.
Am I disturbing you? I think you like to disturb me.
Am I in it? In a way.
Am I in it? In a way.
An old man. Blind people. Garp! Garp!
An old man. Blind people. Garp! Garp!
and become a real writer. All right.
and become a real writer. All right.
and now the undertoad. Come on, Walt's a fine kid.
and now the undertoad. Come on, Walt's a fine kid.
and see how the boys are doing. So how are you?
and see how the boys are doing. So how are you?
And we're lousy on takedowns. Thanks, Tom. We've got some guys...
And we're lousy on takedowns. Thanks, Tom. We've got some guys...
Are you all right? Baby, you found me.
Are you all right? Baby, you found me.
Are you all right? No! Yes.
Are you all right? No! Yes.
Are you gonna come? I think it's a good idea.
Are you gonna come? I think it's a good idea.
Are you visiting somebody here? No, why?
Are you visiting somebody here? No, why?
Arp! Arp! I had more to say...
Arp! Arp! I had more to say...
Ask you a few questions. Will $10 be enough?
Ask you a few questions. Will $10 be enough?
At least change the title. No. I want it Ellen.
At least change the title. No. I want it Ellen.
Back to your basic hospital white, Mom? Yes.
Back to your basic hospital white, Mom? Yes.
Basketball is the best. I'm too short for basketball.
Basketball is the best. I'm too short for basketball.
Basketball. I don't know.
Basketball. I don't know.
Beg your pardon? Lust.
Beg your pardon? Lust.
Bonkers just got a little excited. Fine. I'm a little excited too.
Bonkers just got a little excited. Fine. I'm a little excited too.
Bonkie! Oh!
Bonkie! Oh!
Boy, has she got problems. Yes, she does.
Boy, has she got problems. Yes, she does.
Bullshit, you big dyke. I am not a dyke.
Bullshit, you big dyke. I am not a dyke.
But a wedding ring, dear... I didn't need his ring, Mother.
But a wedding ring, dear... I didn't need his ring, Mother.
But a writer first and foremost? Yeah, a real writer.
But a writer first and foremost? Yeah, a real writer.
But are you all right? Oh, I'm fine.
But are you all right? Oh, I'm fine.
But I never got married. Neither did I.
But I never got married. Neither did I.
but I... Pooh.
but I... Pooh.
But it was that double armed... It was lust.
But it was that double armed... It was lust.
But when I wanted to write about your... My son is also a writer.
But when I wanted to write about your... My son is also a writer.
Bye bye. Bye.
Bye bye. Bye.
Bye, Duncan. Bye bye, sweetheart. Bye, Duncan.
Bye, Duncan. Bye bye, sweetheart. Bye, Duncan.
Can I have it? What?
Can I have it? What?
Can you imagine? I'm sorry.
Can you imagine? I'm sorry.
Can you say "bye, Grandma"? Bye, Grandma.
Can you say "bye, Grandma"? Bye, Grandma.
Can't tell yet. Quiet type?
Can't tell yet. Quiet type?
Can't you stay a couple more days? I've gotta go.
Can't you stay a couple more days? I've gotta go.
Caught him when he fell off the roof. Hm.
Caught him when he fell off the roof. Hm.
Come along! Yes, Mother.
Come along! Yes, Mother.
Come here. First there was the gradual student...
Come here. First there was the gradual student...
Come on, Rachel! Don't "Rachel" me, Stephen.
Come on, Rachel! Don't "Rachel" me, Stephen.
Come on. I don't feel like a movie.
Come on. I don't feel like a movie.
Could you write something in there? Yes.
Could you write something in there? Yes.
Cushie, what happened? Bonkie bit Garp.
Cushie, what happened? Bonkie bit Garp.
Cushie? Garp!
Cushie? Garp!
Dada. Not Dada.
Dada. Not Dada.
Daddy's a guy. But Daddy has Mommy.
Daddy's a guy. But Daddy has Mommy.
Dead men don't eat. Dead men don't bitch, either.
Dead men don't eat. Dead men don't bitch, either.
Did you hear that, Dad? What's that?
Did you hear that, Dad? What's that?
Did you really do them yourself? Yes.
Did you really do them yourself? Yes.
Do you always wear a sweat suit? Don't you like it?
Do you always wear a sweat suit? Don't you like it?
Do you know who the winner was? No.
Do you know who the winner was? No.
Do you promise? Yes.
Do you promise? Yes.
Do you think I'm gonna be a real writer? I do. Oh, I do.
Do you think I'm gonna be a real writer? I do. Oh, I do.
Does he write sad stuff too? Hardly.
Does he write sad stuff too? Hardly.
Does it hurt? Yes. A lot.
Does it hurt? Yes. A lot.
Don't you have ahold of it? No, your glove.
Don't you have ahold of it? No, your glove.
Don't you think I want to? No, I don't think I want to.
Don't you think I want to? No, I don't think I want to.
Down. Set. Hut, hut, hut. One Mississippi, two Mississippi...
Down. Set. Hut, hut, hut. One Mississippi, two Mississippi...
Drive carefully. Goodbye, darling.
Drive carefully. Goodbye, darling.
Easy. Sorry, baby. Sorry.
Easy. Sorry, baby. Sorry.
Garp, what happened? Bonkers bit me!
Garp, what happened? Bonkers bit me!
Garp! I'm afraid.
Garp! I'm afraid.
Garp! Mom, help me!
Garp! Mom, help me!
Garp? Jesus Christ!
Garp? Jesus Christ!
Garp? Yes, Garp.
Garp? Yes, Garp.
Good afternoon, Dean Bodger. Good afternoon, Jenny.
Good afternoon, Dean Bodger. Good afternoon, Jenny.
Good luck to you. Thank you very much.
Good luck to you. Thank you very much.
Good night, son. Good night, Mom.
Good night, son. Good night, Mom.
Goodbye, Helen. Bye, Roberta.
Goodbye, Helen. Bye, Roberta.
Got it? Yeah, I got it. You can let go now.
Got it? Yeah, I got it. You can let go now.
Guess what. What?
Guess what. What?
Have a lovely trip back. We will.
Have a lovely trip back. We will.
Have you talked with her about it? No, I couldn't find her.
Have you talked with her about it? No, I couldn't find her.
He is. He's quoting Granny. I don't care. Come on.
He is. He's quoting Granny. I don't care. Come on.
He's a fine boy. Good wrestler. He's full of lust.
He's a fine boy. Good wrestler. He's full of lust.
He's in there, right? Yeah.
He's in there, right? Yeah.
Hear that, Walt? We're having fun. What's Mom gonna eat...
Hear that, Walt? We're having fun. What's Mom gonna eat...
Hello there, Garp. Hello, dean.
Hello there, Garp. Hello, dean.
Hello? Hello, Helen.
Hello? Hello, Helen.
Help! Mom, help! Dean! Dean Bodger!
Help! Mom, help! Dean! Dean Bodger!
Here. Don't give me money here.
Here. Don't give me money here.
Hey, Garp, you wanna play? Yes, I do.
Hey, Garp, you wanna play? Yes, I do.
Hey, over here, Stuey! I know how to make babies.
Hey, over here, Stuey! I know how to make babies.
Hey! Ah!
Hey! Ah!
Hi, Jenny. What's your name?
Hi, Jenny. What's your name?
Hi, Mrs. Garp. Hi, Jimmy. Come on in.
Hi, Mrs. Garp. Hi, Jimmy. Come on in.
Hi. Hi.
Hi. Hi.
His ear? Part of it.
His ear? Part of it.
Hold tight. It's all right. Mattresses. Get your mattresses!
Hold tight. It's all right. Mattresses. Get your mattresses!
How are you doing? Very well, thank you.
How are you doing? Very well, thank you.
How come we're eating out? Because it's fun.
How come we're eating out? Because it's fun.
How do you do? Hi.
How do you do? Hi.
How do you know? Oh, just a writer's instinct.
How do you know? Oh, just a writer's instinct.
How old are you? Eighteen.
How old are you? Eighteen.
How wonderful! Not so hard.
How wonderful! Not so hard.
How's Helen? She's fine.
How's Helen? She's fine.
Hurry, boys! Hurry. Give me your free foot.
Hurry, boys! Hurry. Give me your free foot.
I am so. Inside, Duncan.
I am so. Inside, Duncan.
I don't know. It depends. I'll give you 20.
I don't know. It depends. I'll give you 20.
I don't see what you see in politics. A mess, that's what. I don't like it.
I don't see what you see in politics. A mess, that's what. I don't like it.
I get the picture. I don't think you do.
I get the picture. I don't think you do.
I had a great pair of hands. Yes, you did.
I had a great pair of hands. Yes, you did.
I have an appointment. With who?
I have an appointment. With who?
I just really love it. What?
I just really love it. What?
I know too. How could you?
I know too. How could you?
I know. I loved her so.
I know. I loved her so.
I love kids. Me too.
I love kids. Me too.
I needed his sperm. No...!
I needed his sperm. No...!
I never found out. She never found out his first name?
I never found out. She never found out his first name?
I remember. You were too young to remember.
I remember. You were too young to remember.
I see. I'll just be going. Not yet. No, not yet.
I see. I'll just be going. Not yet. No, not yet.
I think it was his last name. What was his first name?
I think it was his last name. What was his first name?
I think you'd better write that. Thank you. I will.
I think you'd better write that. Thank you. I will.
I tried that already, but it hurts. It's either that or amputate.
I tried that already, but it hurts. It's either that or amputate.
I wanna do what they do. Animals.
I wanna do what they do. Animals.
I wanna talk with one of them. Come on.
I wanna talk with one of them. Come on.
I want to die too. All right.
I want to die too. All right.
I wanted to fly. I understand. It's all right.
I wanted to fly. I understand. It's all right.
I wonder who they all are. Moochers, hangers on.
I wonder who they all are. Moochers, hangers on.
I'll see you in the morning. If I'm still here.
I'll see you in the morning. If I'm still here.
I'll see you. Take care.
I'll see you. Take care.
I'll send the sitter out. Roger and out.
I'll send the sitter out. Roger and out.
I'll teach you. Monkey in the middle.
I'll teach you. Monkey in the middle.
I'm a nurse. I know. When's what due?
I'm a nurse. I know. When's what due?
I'm a wrestling coach. Changed jobs, eh?
I'm a wrestling coach. Changed jobs, eh?
I'm almost sorry we're going back. Home is home.
I'm almost sorry we're going back. Home is home.
I'm gonna be a reader. Maybe you'll marry a writer.
I'm gonna be a reader. Maybe you'll marry a writer.
I'm Helen Holm. Oh, Holm sweet Holm.
I'm Helen Holm. Oh, Holm sweet Holm.
I'm sorry. All I did was touch her. It's all right.
I'm sorry. All I did was touch her. It's all right.
I'm sorry. All I did was touch her. It's all right.
I'm sorry. All I did was touch her. It's all right.
I'm tired of that answer. I'm tired of your questions.
I'm tired of that answer. I'm tired of your questions.
I've always read a lot. Me too.
I've always read a lot. Me too.
I've got to see you, Helen. You must go. You can't come in.
I've got to see you, Helen. You must go. You can't come in.
I've read everything you've written. Really?
I've read everything you've written. Really?
If a man shows up... A man is showing up.
If a man shows up... A man is showing up.
Is he a teen? I don't know.
Is he a teen? I don't know.
Is it all over? Yes.
Is it all over? Yes.
Is it all right? It's not an "it."
Is it all right? It's not an "it."
Is she expecting you? Fuck you, you douche bag.
Is she expecting you? Fuck you, you douche bag.
Is that the latest fashion? No, Mom, that's the oldest profession.
Is that the latest fashion? No, Mom, that's the oldest profession.
Is that what you want? Maybe.
Is that what you want? Maybe.
Is this your first time? No.
Is this your first time? No.
It hurts! Come on, you run along to your house.
It hurts! Come on, you run along to your house.
It was my idea. It was. Story credit goes to Duncan.
It was my idea. It was. Story credit goes to Duncan.
it's all over. Of course I will.
it's all over. Of course I will.
It's all right. Jesus Christ.
It's all right. Jesus Christ.
It's finished when I say it's finished. Wow, it's real macho time.
It's finished when I say it's finished. Wow, it's real macho time.
It's just something you know. What are you going to write about?
It's just something you know. What are you going to write about?
It's Lone Ranger, not Long. He died.
It's Lone Ranger, not Long. He died.
It's not quantity that counts. Thank God for that.
It's not quantity that counts. Thank God for that.
It's the timing. Timing.
It's the timing. Timing.
Jenny, you must know his first name. Technical Sergeant Garp.
Jenny, you must know his first name. Technical Sergeant Garp.
Jim. The movie should be over by 10:30...
Jim. The movie should be over by 10:30...
John McCormack. Really?
John McCormack. Really?
Just for a minute. We're not going anywhere.
Just for a minute. We're not going anywhere.
Leave it alone for a while. Yes, Miss Fields.
Leave it alone for a while. Yes, Miss Fields.
Let him? Why not?
Let him? Why not?
Let me see yours. No, I've got to go.
Let me see yours. No, I've got to go.
Let's go. The movie's not finished yet.
Let's go. The movie's not finished yet.
Let's make love. I don't think so.
Let's make love. I don't think so.
Like Joyce? Maybe.
Like Joyce? Maybe.
Looks that way. Can I give you a lift someplace?
Looks that way. Can I give you a lift someplace?
Maybe this time it'll work out. Maybe so.
Maybe this time it'll work out. Maybe so.
Me neither. Too bad. Let's go.
Me neither. Too bad. Let's go.
Michael Milton. Is that his name? Yeah.
Michael Milton. Is that his name? Yeah.
Michael, damn it, will you listen? You can't. You just can't.
Michael, damn it, will you listen? You can't. You just can't.
Michael! We wouldn't have to leave the car.
Michael! We wouldn't have to leave the car.
Mocha Madness, Michael Milton. He's not gay.
Mocha Madness, Michael Milton. He's not gay.
Mom, can we go now? Do you feel anything?
Mom, can we go now? Do you feel anything?
Mom, I'm sorry. I didn't know. He's my son.
Mom, I'm sorry. I didn't know. He's my son.
Mom! I'm all right. I'm all right, darling.
Mom! I'm all right. I'm all right, darling.
Mom! Mom! Mom! Garp?
Mom! Mom! Mom! Garp?
Move it around, guys. Here we go.
Move it around, guys. Here we go.
Mr. Percy said that I tasted good! He did, did he?
Mr. Percy said that I tasted good! He did, did he?
My glove? Look, I don't want babies.
My glove? Look, I don't want babies.
My Laurel's not your type. Perhaps she's not your type, either.
My Laurel's not your type. Perhaps she's not your type, either.
My mother and I were just... Your mother?
My mother and I were just... Your mother?
My son is not dog food, goddamn it! Calm down, Jenny.
My son is not dog food, goddamn it! Calm down, Jenny.
Next! Do it!
Next! Do it!
Nice job, Ernie. Nice yourself.
Nice job, Ernie. Nice yourself.
No tackling. Unnecessary roughness.
No tackling. Unnecessary roughness.
No, Bonkers! No! Cushie!
No, Bonkers! No! Cushie!
No, don't do that. It tickles. No, Bonkers! Stop it, Bonkers!
No, don't do that. It tickles. No, Bonkers! Stop it, Bonkers!
No, I'm so... Oh, no. I'm sorry.
No, I'm so... Oh, no. I'm sorry.
No, Michael, please! I brought some champagne.
No, Michael, please! I brought some champagne.
Nobody's scared of bears. And bears are scared of nobody.
Nobody's scared of bears. And bears are scared of nobody.
Not like this. I said, it's over.
Not like this. I said, it's over.
Not tonight. I have a headache. Every night you have a headache.
Not tonight. I have a headache. Every night you have a headache.
Nothing's happened to me yet, Mom. Well, too bad.
Nothing's happened to me yet, Mom. Well, too bad.
Now it's done. We need a granny around the house.
Now it's done. We need a granny around the house.
Oh, boy. Helen!
Oh, boy. Helen!
Oh, Christ. I'm sorry... It was cut off on purpose...
Oh, Christ. I'm sorry... It was cut off on purpose...
Oh, hey, hey. Look out!
Oh, hey, hey. Look out!
Oh, hi, Jenny. Mr. Holm...
Oh, hi, Jenny. Mr. Holm...
Oh, I did it again. You sure did.
Oh, I did it again. You sure did.
Oh, I don't think so. Really?
Oh, I don't think so. Really?
Oh, Mom. I don't want any more discussion.
Oh, Mom. I don't want any more discussion.
Oh, my God. Stephen! Stephen! Rachel?
Oh, my God. Stephen! Stephen! Rachel?
Oh, no, she wants to talk. What's your regular charge?
Oh, no, she wants to talk. What's your regular charge?
Oh? Can you fly?
Oh? Can you fly?
Okay? Okay.
Okay? Okay.
Or do you think it only degrades him? I don't know.
Or do you think it only degrades him? I don't know.
Pretty nice Halloween party, huh? Death scared me.
Pretty nice Halloween party, huh? Death scared me.
Promise. I promise.
Promise. I promise.
Quickly. Now...
Quickly. Now...
Quiet! Go fuck yourself.
Quiet! Go fuck yourself.
Ready, Sir Walt? Ready, roger and out, Sir Duncan.
Ready, Sir Walt? Ready, roger and out, Sir Duncan.
Really? Really.
Really? Really.
Really? That's right.
Really? That's right.
Really? Yep.
Really? Yep.
Roberta called. To wish us a happy Halloween?
Roberta called. To wish us a happy Halloween?
Say "Grandma." No.
Say "Grandma." No.
See the line, you know? Mm hm.
See the line, you know? Mm hm.
She's a cult, not a writer. Hi.
She's a cult, not a writer. Hi.
She's very nice, Mom, but... What is it about her that you want?
She's very nice, Mom, but... What is it about her that you want?
Short stories. Sexual Suspect?
Short stories. Sexual Suspect?
Sleep well. You too.
Sleep well. You too.
So this is the little girl. She's not little anymore.
So this is the little girl. She's not little anymore.
so we'll be back by 11. Okay.
so we'll be back by 11. Okay.
So, what brings you home? I'm visiting.
So, what brings you home? I'm visiting.
Son, Helen's expecting. No, she's not.
Son, Helen's expecting. No, she's not.
Sorry to hear that. But he really didn't.
Sorry to hear that. But he really didn't.
Sorry. I should hope so.
Sorry. I should hope so.
Stay right here. Okay.
Stay right here. Okay.
still alive, and she helps him. And I get to do the drawings.
still alive, and she helps him. And I get to do the drawings.
Stop quoting Roberta. I'm quoting Granny.
Stop quoting Roberta. I'm quoting Granny.
Stop! Bonkers!
Stop! Bonkers!
Swish! Nice shot. All right, good shot.
Swish! Nice shot. All right, good shot.
Technical sergeant? T.S.
Technical sergeant? T.S.
Ten dollars? What's the usual charge?
Ten dollars? What's the usual charge?
Thank God I caught him. Yes, just in time.
Thank God I caught him. Yes, just in time.
That sounds wonderful. Shh.
That sounds wonderful. Shh.
That was just a costume. It scared me.
That was just a costume. It scared me.
That's not very artistic, though. I'm not an artist.
That's not very artistic, though. I'm not an artist.
That's the rules. I'll become the villain.
That's the rules. I'll become the villain.
The kids love it. It's like flying. It's dangerous and silly.
The kids love it. It's like flying. It's dangerous and silly.
The picture. Why?
The picture. Why?
The what? The Feis Ceoil.
The what? The Feis Ceoil.
There you are. We're gonna go in.
There you are. We're gonna go in.
They're already ruined. Oh.
They're already ruined. Oh.
This whole house is full of... I know, I know.
This whole house is full of... I know, I know.
threatening letters to me. Me too. So what?
threatening letters to me. Me too. So what?
Understand? Yes, Miss Fields.
Understand? Yes, Miss Fields.
Undertoad. There's no toad under the water.
Undertoad. There's no toad under the water.
Walt is scared of death, Mom. No, he's not.
Walt is scared of death, Mom. No, he's not.
Was he on our side, at least? He wasn't on any side.
Was he on our side, at least? He wasn't on any side.
Was that his first name or last name? It was Garp.
Was that his first name or last name? It was Garp.
Watch him! Take the shot, Gary.
Watch him! Take the shot, Gary.
Watch where you're running. Sorry.
Watch where you're running. Sorry.
We beat him, Mom. We did. We killed him.
We beat him, Mom. We did. We killed him.
We call him "Holm sweat Holm." He's my father. I'm his daughter.
We call him "Holm sweat Holm." He's my father. I'm his daughter.
We looked at them last night. I know.
We looked at them last night. I know.
We'll take the house. Garp.
We'll take the house. Garp.
We're the Holm team. Oh.
We're the Holm team. Oh.
We've really got to go. Why, do you like her?
We've really got to go. Why, do you like her?
What are you doing? Writing.
What are you doing? Writing.
What do you mean? I mean she has no tongue.
What do you mean? I mean she has no tongue.
What do you weigh, about 112 or so? One thirteen.
What do you weigh, about 112 or so? One thirteen.
What does that mean? Don't know what an Ellen Jamesian is?
What does that mean? Don't know what an Ellen Jamesian is?
What for? So he won't bite anymore.
What for? So he won't bite anymore.
What happened? Bonkie bit Garp.
What happened? Bonkie bit Garp.
What happened? I had a fight with Helen.
What happened? I had a fight with Helen.
What happened? Oh, it's all right.
What happened? Oh, it's all right.
What the hell did he do? Garp bit Bonkie.
What the hell did he do? Garp bit Bonkie.
What was his name? Michael Milton.
What was his name? Michael Milton.
What? You're not well enough to walk.
What? You're not well enough to walk.
What'd Cushie think of it? Cushie?
What'd Cushie think of it? Cushie?
What's he saying? Boo hoo.
What's he saying? Boo hoo.
What's her problem? She's an Ellen Jamesian.
What's her problem? She's an Ellen Jamesian.
What's it to you? Hello. My name is Garp.
What's it to you? Hello. My name is Garp.
What's she doing? Spare me your modesty.
What's she doing? Spare me your modesty.
What's T.S. stand for? Terribly Sexy.
What's T.S. stand for? Terribly Sexy.
What's that? Some of my hate mail.
What's that? Some of my hate mail.
What's the definition of a bra? I don't know. What?
What's the definition of a bra? I don't know. What?
What's the definition of a girdle? I don't know.
What's the definition of a girdle? I don't know.
What's the matter? Nothing.
What's the matter? Nothing.
What's this? Bonkers' ear.
What's this? Bonkers' ear.
What's wrong? You guys always get to die.
What's wrong? You guys always get to die.
When are you due? How did you know?
When are you due? How did you know?
when she comes home? Shut up and eat.
when she comes home? Shut up and eat.
Where are you going? To get a job.
Where are you going? To get a job.
Where are you? What do you care where we are?
Where are you? What do you care where we are?
Where did you put it? Shh.
Where did you put it? Shh.
Where is Bonkers? What for?
Where is Bonkers? What for?
Where is it? I haven't got it.
Where is it? I haven't got it.
Where was I? He kept having erections.
Where was I? He kept having erections.
Where's your handkerchief? I don't have one.
Where's your handkerchief? I don't have one.
Where's your thing? Where's what?
Where's your thing? Where's what?
Who? My father.
Who? My father.
Who's on the roof? Mom!
Who's on the roof? Mom!
Who's that? Garp?
Who's that? Garp?
Who's that? Somebody Mother introduced me to.
Who's that? Somebody Mother introduced me to.
Whores? Oh, yes.
Whores? Oh, yes.
Why not? Because it's illegal, Mom.
Why not? Because it's illegal, Mom.
Why not? I'll tell you about it someday.
Why not? I'll tell you about it someday.
Why? Because it is, that's why.
Why? Because it is, that's why.
Will I ever fly like Daddy? I don't know.
Will I ever fly like Daddy? I don't know.
With Helen? And Bonkers too.
With Helen? And Bonkers too.
Yeah, yeah. Stop, you son of a bitch!
Yeah, yeah. Stop, you son of a bitch!
Yeah? Thank you so much for everything.
Yeah? Thank you so much for everything.
Yeah. And the landscaping.
Yeah. And the landscaping.
Yes, you see, my mother... I don't go for no kinky stuff.
Yes, you see, my mother... I don't go for no kinky stuff.
Yes? What about Dean Bodger?
Yes? What about Dean Bodger?
You and who else? Me and him.
You and who else? Me and him.
You can't be serious. You bet your fat ass I am!
You can't be serious. You bet your fat ass I am!
You can't live in the past. I'm not.
You can't live in the past. I'm not.
You can't stay? No, I have to go...
You can't stay? No, I have to go...
You certainly won't marry a wrestler. You can be very sure of that.
You certainly won't marry a wrestler. You can be very sure of that.
You coming? In a minute.
You coming? In a minute.
You do? Yes. Don't you?
You do? Yes. Don't you?
You don't really need a father. All the other kids have one.
You don't really need a father. All the other kids have one.
You don't think that's overreacting? Well, he's...
You don't think that's overreacting? Well, he's...
You folks all right down there? Yeah, I'm okay. We're all right.
You folks all right down there? Yeah, I'm okay. We're all right.
You gonna be a writer? No chance.
You gonna be a writer? No chance.
You got it. No fair, no fair.
You got it. No fair, no fair.
You know, I've just been reading this. Really? How do you like it?
You know, I've just been reading this. Really? How do you like it?
You know, maybe we should move. Why?
You know, maybe we should move. Why?
You like football? Oh, yeah, I used to watch it quite a bit.
You like football? Oh, yeah, I used to watch it quite a bit.
You mind if I use your phone? Sure, if you can find it.
You mind if I use your phone? Sure, if you can find it.
You pay for the coffee? Of course.
You pay for the coffee? Of course.
You shouldn't tease him. He didn't!
You shouldn't tease him. He didn't!
You want anything funny... I don't intend to watch.
You want anything funny... I don't intend to watch.
You want to hurt them. No, I don't.
You want to hurt them. No, I don't.
You writing anything? No.
You writing anything? No.
You wrote it for me. Yeah.
You wrote it for me. Yeah.
You're Jenny's son! Yes, I am.
You're Jenny's son! Yes, I am.
You're out of bounds. Concentration.
You're out of bounds. Concentration.
You're using her too. I'm just helping to state her case.
You're using her too. I'm just helping to state her case.
You've got a nice tan. That's all I got.
You've got a nice tan. That's all I got.
You've read him? Uh huh.
You've read him? Uh huh.
Your mother's weird. You could say that.
Your mother's weird. You could say that.
Your thing. My thing?
Your thing. My thing?
"Dear Frank, the kids are in the school, the dog is in the yard...
"Dear Frank, the kids are in the school, the dog is in the yard...
"Garp." Is that right? Garp?
"Garp." Is that right? Garp?
"In this dirty minded world, you are either somebody's wife...
"In this dirty minded world, you are either somebody's wife...
"Mythology."
"Mythology."
"That was the year that I got to introduce...
"That was the year that I got to introduce...

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