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Zoolander "Zoolander" is a hilarious satire film that takes an amusing look at the world of male modeling. Released in

Zoolander

"Zoolander" is a hilarious satire film that takes an amusing look at the world of male modeling. Released in 2001, this comedy masterpiece was directed by Ben Stiller, who also stars as the titular character, Derek Zoolander. Joined by an incredible ensemble cast including Owen Wilson as the rival model Hansel, Will Ferrell as the villainous designer Mugatu, and Christine Taylor as journalist Matilda Jeffries, they bring the fashion industry to life with their impeccable comedic timing. This iconic film is a must-watch for anyone looking for a good laugh. If you're interested in immersing yourself in the sounds of the film, you can play and download them right here.

A center for ants?
A center for ants?
A finger jockey. We don't think the same as the face and body boys.
A finger jockey. We don't think the same as the face and body boys.
A little massage, some aromatherapy.
A little massage, some aromatherapy.
A shallow, dumb, vacuous moron.
A shallow, dumb, vacuous moron.
A week? What, are you having a whack attack?
A week? What, are you having a whack attack?
A what?
A what?
Abe Lincoln wanted to abolish slavery, right?
Abe Lincoln wanted to abolish slavery, right?
Actually, I can't, Steve, because it's not yet perfected.
Actually, I can't, Steve, because it's not yet perfected.
After Frankie gave him the heave ho, he held a series of odd jobs until...
After Frankie gave him the heave ho, he held a series of odd jobs until...
Age before beauty, goat cheese.
Age before beauty, goat cheese.
Ah, there he is.
Ah, there he is.
All right, forget it.
All right, forget it.
All right, guys. Last one to the helicopter's a rotten egg. Let's go!
All right, guys. Last one to the helicopter's a rotten egg. Let's go!
All right, who's gonna call this sucker?
All right, who's gonna call this sucker?
All the Zoolander men together again, like when we were kids.
All the Zoolander men together again, like when we were kids.
Already considered a living saint...
Already considered a living saint...
Am I gonna find someone that beef headed?
Am I gonna find someone that beef headed?
Am I gonna find someone that beef headed?
Am I gonna find someone that beef headed?
And "incredibly chiseled features..."
And "incredibly chiseled features..."
And a head full of bad memories.
And a head full of bad memories.
And a professional human being.
And a professional human being.
And all he had to do was turn left.
And all he had to do was turn left.
And an attitude that says, "Wiho cares? It's only fashion..."
And an attitude that says, "Wiho cares? It's only fashion..."
And behind every hit, a card carrying male model.
And behind every hit, a card carrying male model.
And breathe deeply.
And breathe deeply.
And couldn't some of this, maybe, be in your mind??'
And couldn't some of this, maybe, be in your mind??'
And cut!
And cut!
And end child labor once and for all...
And end child labor once and for all...
And five syllables...
And five syllables...
And former model agent Maury Ballstein.
And former model agent Maury Ballstein.
And I felt like when you told me to "dere lick" my balls...
And I felt like when you told me to "dere lick" my balls...
And I felt like, "This guy's really hurting me"...
And I felt like, "This guy's really hurting me"...
And I hear Magnum is gonna blow us all away.
And I hear Magnum is gonna blow us all away.
And I just...
And I just...
And I plan on finding out what that is. Thank you.
And I plan on finding out what that is. Thank you.
And I trust you would like to live to see your spring line as well?
And I trust you would like to live to see your spring line as well?
And I try to think about that every time I get in front of a camera...
And I try to think about that every time I get in front of a camera...
And I want you to know I understand where you're coming from.
And I want you to know I understand where you're coming from.
And I want you, Derek, to be the face...
And I want you, Derek, to be the face...
And I will be a monkey's uncle if I have you ruin this for me!
And I will be a monkey's uncle if I have you ruin this for me!
And I'll heat it up in the microwave when I get home.
And I'll heat it up in the microwave when I get home.
And I'm not your bra.
And I'm not your bra.
And I'm very complimented but not interested.
And I'm very complimented but not interested.
And if it indeed is what day you claim it is...
And if it indeed is what day you claim it is...
And incredibly self centered.
And incredibly self centered.
And it breaks my heart.
And it breaks my heart.
And it hurt.
And it hurt.
And it's funny how it switches like that.
And it's funny how it switches like that.
And left them clawing their faces for more...
And left them clawing their faces for more...
And mine's kind ofwinding down or whatever.
And mine's kind ofwinding down or whatever.
And most important of all, models don't think for themselves.
And most important of all, models don't think for themselves.
And not the otherway around.
And not the otherway around.
And now that you're retired, I can't have you.
And now that you're retired, I can't have you.
And sell it to Queen Elizabeth as earrings.
And sell it to Queen Elizabeth as earrings.
And so do I. Let me show you mine.
And so do I. Let me show you mine.
And South America too...
And South America too...
And starring in that show, veteran supermodel Derek Zoolander...
And starring in that show, veteran supermodel Derek Zoolander...
And stunning features...
And stunning features...
And that's when I found out I was in line to assassinate Jimmy Carter.
And that's when I found out I was in line to assassinate Jimmy Carter.
And that's who Derek Zoolander is defending his title against tonight...
And that's who Derek Zoolander is defending his title against tonight...
And then there's Ferrari and Le Tigre.
And then there's Ferrari and Le Tigre.
And then you sort of laid low for a while...
And then you sort of laid low for a while...
And tutoring underprivileged retards or some shit.
And tutoring underprivileged retards or some shit.
And we need a place to hide until we figure this whole thing out.
And we need a place to hide until we figure this whole thing out.
And wear their hair in interesting ways.
And wear their hair in interesting ways.
And wetness is the essence of beauty...
And wetness is the essence of beauty...
And when he's finished, we'll dispose of him.
And when he's finished, we'll dispose of him.
And when I say brother, I don't mean like an actual brother...
And when I say brother, I don't mean like an actual brother...
And who couldn't turn left to save his ass.
And who couldn't turn left to save his ass.
And Who Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too...
And Who Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too...
And you're a super hot ninja machine!
And you're a super hot ninja machine!
And your "do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives"...
And your "do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives"...
And?
And?
And?
And?
Any comment on Prime Minister Hassan's wage increases...
Any comment on Prime Minister Hassan's wage increases...
Anyway...
Anyway...
Apparently, the guy was the original guitar synth player...
Apparently, the guy was the original guitar synth player...
Are you a ghost?
Are you a ghost?
Are you challenging me to a walk off...
Are you challenging me to a walk off...
Are you guys insane? Do you understand? It's a disease.
Are you guys insane? Do you understand? It's a disease.
Are you kidding? I shouldn't even be talking about it.
Are you kidding? I shouldn't even be talking about it.
Are you not aware that I get farty and bloated with a foamy latte?
Are you not aware that I get farty and bloated with a foamy latte?
Are you serious? I just... I just told you that a moment ago.
Are you serious? I just... I just told you that a moment ago.
Are you worried about Hansel?
Are you worried about Hansel?
As someone who gets his picture taken for a living?
As someone who gets his picture taken for a living?
As the newly elected prime minister has given this nation hope...
As the newly elected prime minister has given this nation hope...
Because if you can't get the job done, then I will!
Because if you can't get the job done, then I will!
Because it gave people a chance to see a side of my versatility...
Because it gave people a chance to see a side of my versatility...
Because Mugatu's making you an offer you won 't believe...
Because Mugatu's making you an offer you won 't believe...
Before Derek assassinates a world leader.
Before Derek assassinates a world leader.
Before Derek kills the Malaysian prime minister.
Before Derek kills the Malaysian prime minister.
Big rush...
Big rush...
Blue Steel, Ferrari, Le Tigre?
Blue Steel, Ferrari, Le Tigre?
Boo lander?
Boo lander?
Breathe deeply.
Breathe deeply.
Bulimic.
Bulimic.
But first, me and him gotta straighten some shit out.
But first, me and him gotta straighten some shit out.
But he won't budge.
But he won't budge.
But he's tougher to get to than the president.
But he's tougher to get to than the president.
But how do you feel about male models?
But how do you feel about male models?
But I can tell you that it's called Magnum and...
But I can tell you that it's called Magnum and...
But I got a news flash for you, Walter Cronkite.
But I got a news flash for you, Walter Cronkite.
But I mean it like the way black people use it...
But I mean it like the way black people use it...
But I think I'm doing okay.
But I think I'm doing okay.
But I won't do it. I won't kill anybody.
But I won't do it. I won't kill anybody.
But I'd really like to continue talking about this conversation.
But I'd really like to continue talking about this conversation.
But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot...
But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot...
But if this has been going on for so long, Mugatu...
But if this has been going on for so long, Mugatu...
But if this has been going on for so long, Mugatu...
But if this has been going on for so long, Mugatu...
But my new fall line is almost due.
But my new fall line is almost due.
But now the forbidden fruit must be tasted.
But now the forbidden fruit must be tasted.
But the fact that he's making it, I respect that...
But the fact that he's making it, I respect that...
But they won't be looking for not us.
But they won't be looking for not us.
But this is Mugatu, Derek.
But this is Mugatu, Derek.
But today, the age old right of children to work is under attack...
But today, the age old right of children to work is under attack...
But who do you think made the powdered wigs and leg stockings...
But who do you think made the powdered wigs and leg stockings...
But why male models?
But why male models?
But you can help these children, Derek...
But you can help these children, Derek...
But you've represented every male model in each of his campaigns.
But you've represented every male model in each of his campaigns.
By killing the prime minister ofMalaysia...
By killing the prime minister ofMalaysia...
Can I come with?
Can I come with?
Can't you even pretend to be happy to see me, Pop?
Can't you even pretend to be happy to see me, Pop?
Celebrities...
Celebrities...
Come on, man! Come on!
Come on, man! Come on!
Come on!
Come on!
Come on. There's gotta be...
Come on. There's gotta be...
Come, let's get you loosened up.
Come, let's get you loosened up.
Concentrate, Derelicte...
Concentrate, Derelicte...
Cool story, Hansel.
Cool story, Hansel.
Cool.
Cool.
Cool.
Cool.
Creating a tension which clogs the pores.
Creating a tension which clogs the pores.
Damn it, Derek, I'm a coal miner, not a professional television actor.
Damn it, Derek, I'm a coal miner, not a professional television actor.
Damn it, you're right.
Damn it, you're right.
Dance, monkey, in your little spangly shoes!
Dance, monkey, in your little spangly shoes!
Dance, monkey, in your little spangly shoes!
Dance, monkey, in your little spangly shoes!
Day. D A I Y E. Okay?
Day. D A I Y E. Okay?
Dear God.
Dear God.
Der ek Zoo lan der...
Der ek Zoo lan der...
Derek and Matilda are hiding 'cause some dudes brainwashed Derek...
Derek and Matilda are hiding 'cause some dudes brainwashed Derek...
Derek has been brainwashed...
Derek has been brainwashed...
Derek is dead unless we get that evidence. Do you guys...
Derek is dead unless we get that evidence. Do you guys...
Derek said this would be the last place anyone would look for him.
Derek said this would be the last place anyone would look for him.
Derek Zoolander just tried to kill the prime minister of Malaysia.
Derek Zoolander just tried to kill the prime minister of Malaysia.
Derek Zoolander will be dead, and you'll be fine.
Derek Zoolander will be dead, and you'll be fine.
Derek Zoolander...
Derek Zoolander...
Derek, back on top, man.
Derek, back on top, man.
Derek, get a grip!
Derek, get a grip!
Derek, get down!
Derek, get down!
Derek, I don't know what you're talking...
Derek, I don't know what you're talking...
Derek, I don't think you're cut out for that kind of thing.
Derek, I don't think you're cut out for that kind of thing.
Derek, I just have a few more questions, if that's okay.
Derek, I just have a few more questions, if that's okay.
Derek, I'd like you to meet Katinka Ingabogovinana.
Derek, I'd like you to meet Katinka Ingabogovinana.
Derek, I'm...
Derek, I'm...
Derek, my editor put that headline on it, okay?
Derek, my editor put that headline on it, okay?
Derek, that's not true.
Derek, that's not true.
Derek, that's nothing to be ashamed of.
Derek, that's nothing to be ashamed of.
Derek, you know Natani and Chloe.
Derek, you know Natani and Chloe.
Derek, you're the laughing stock of the entire fashion world.
Derek, you're the laughing stock of the entire fashion world.
Derelicte!
Derelicte!
Did my pin get in the way of your ass?
Did my pin get in the way of your ass?
Did you ever think that maybe there's more to life...
Did you ever think that maybe there's more to life...
Did you press that apple thing?
Did you press that apple thing?
Didn't you hear me, Maury? I just retired.
Didn't you hear me, Maury? I just retired.
Die, you wage hiking scum!
Die, you wage hiking scum!
Disqualified.
Disqualified.
Do as you've been trained to do and kill the Malaysian prime minister!
Do as you've been trained to do and kill the Malaysian prime minister!
Do I know what I'm doing today? No...
Do I know what I'm doing today? No...
Do I know what product I'm selling? No...
Do I know what product I'm selling? No...
Do it then.
Do it then.
Do it, Hansel.
Do it, Hansel.
Do it, Hansel.
Do it, Hansel.
Do me a favor and lose five pounds immediately...
Do me a favor and lose five pounds immediately...
Do me a favor. If anything happens to me, give this to Matilda.
Do me a favor. If anything happens to me, give this to Matilda.
Do not be distracted by the beautiful celebrities...
Do not be distracted by the beautiful celebrities...
Do not be distracted by the beautiful celebrities...
Do not be distracted by the beautiful celebrities...
Do us all a favor and get out of here.
Do us all a favor and get out of here.
Do what you've been trained to do, and kill the prime minister!
Do what you've been trained to do, and kill the prime minister!
Do you mind?
Do you mind?
Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you...
Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you...
Doesn't anyone notice this? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!
Doesn't anyone notice this? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!
Don't ask questions.
Don't ask questions.
Don't do this, Derek.
Don't do this, Derek.
Don't you know I'm loco?
Don't you know I'm loco?
Don't you mean "good bye"?
Don't you mean "good bye"?
Done it in a while, yeah.
Done it in a while, yeah.
Down with Mugatu!
Down with Mugatu!
Down!
Down!
Dude, I wasn't gonna say anything...
Dude, I wasn't gonna say anything...
Earth to Brint. I'm not so sure you did...
Earth to Brint. I'm not so sure you did...
Earth to Matilda. I was at a day spa.
Earth to Matilda. I was at a day spa.
Earth to Meekus. Duh, okay? I knew that.
Earth to Meekus. Duh, okay? I knew that.
Easy.
Easy.
Enough already, Ballstein!
Enough already, Ballstein!
Enough! My head hurts!
Enough! My head hurts!
Even if I did, why would I talk to you?
Even if I did, why would I talk to you?
Every day after school, I would come home and...
Every day after school, I would come home and...
Every major political assassination over the last 200 years.
Every major political assassination over the last 200 years.
Everything they need to know to learn to be a professional model...
Everything they need to know to learn to be a professional model...
Evian.
Evian.
Excuse me, Hansel. I don't think there's an easy way to put this...
Excuse me, Hansel. I don't think there's an easy way to put this...
Excuse me, Mr. Mugatu. Mr. Mugatu, Matilda Jeffries.
Excuse me, Mr. Mugatu. Mr. Mugatu, Matilda Jeffries.
Figure out who I am. See you around, Maury.
Figure out who I am. See you around, Maury.
Fine.
Fine.
First model walks, second model duplicates, then elaborates.
First model walks, second model duplicates, then elaborates.
First obstacle.
First obstacle.
For a thriving future in the new millennium...
For a thriving future in the new millennium...
For a thriving future in the new millennium...
For a thriving future in the new millennium...
For ages and ages. You've been around for a long time.
For ages and ages. You've been around for a long time.
For Christ's sake, Derek, you've been down there one day.
For Christ's sake, Derek, you've been down there one day.
For Christ's sake, it's a casserole, Sheila! It'll stay!
For Christ's sake, it's a casserole, Sheila! It'll stay!
For Malaysian garment workers? No, he has no comment.
For Malaysian garment workers? No, he has no comment.
For serious.
For serious.
For that band Frankie Goes to Hollywood, but he got kicked out...
For that band Frankie Goes to Hollywood, but he got kicked out...
Four years in a row couldn't happen.
Four years in a row couldn't happen.
Fourteen days? That's Fashion Week. It's impossible! I have a show!
Fourteen days? That's Fashion Week. It's impossible! I have a show!
From textile factories to iron smelts...
From textile factories to iron smelts...
From that article that I read, it seems like...
From that article that I read, it seems like...
From the Philippines to Bangladesh, in China and India...
From the Philippines to Bangladesh, in China and India...
Get closer, Jaco.
Get closer, Jaco.
Get out!
Get out!
Get this... he invented...
Get this... he invented...
Give me a chance.
Give me a chance.
Give me a little pee pee. Come on, a couple of drops.
Give me a little pee pee. Come on, a couple of drops.
Give them a little lesson in base jumping.
Give them a little lesson in base jumping.
Glad you could join us, Kmart.
Glad you could join us, Kmart.
Go back home? You're overreacting...
Go back home? You're overreacting...
Go!
Go!
Good boy.
Good boy.
Good luck to you, Derek. I've always been a fan of Blue Steel.
Good luck to you, Derek. I've always been a fan of Blue Steel.
Good luck, Derek! Kick Hansel's ass!
Good luck, Derek! Kick Hansel's ass!
Good point.
Good point.
Good, because I'm a hot little potato right now.
Good, because I'm a hot little potato right now.
Good. I deserve to die if I can't beat Han suck ass in a walk off.
Good. I deserve to die if I can't beat Han suck ass in a walk off.
Got that right. How are you doing, Steven?
Got that right. How are you doing, Steven?
Guess what. He made his first look today.
Guess what. He made his first look today.
Guys, what's happening? Did you find the files?
Guys, what's happening? Did you find the files?
Ha! I'm taking you out!
Ha! I'm taking you out!
Han sell out is about to have his Han sell ass...
Han sell out is about to have his Han sell ass...
Han Solo
Han Solo
Handed to him on a platter with french fried potatoes.
Handed to him on a platter with french fried potatoes.
Hansel calling Matil. We have entry. Repeat.
Hansel calling Matil. We have entry. Repeat.
Hansel.
Hansel.
Hansel. He's so hot right now.
Hansel. He's so hot right now.
Hansel...
Hansel...
Happy, happy...
Happy, happy...
Has extended the olive branch to Malaysian Prime Minister Hassan...
Has extended the olive branch to Malaysian Prime Minister Hassan...
Have a bad habit of dying young in freak accidents.
Have a bad habit of dying young in freak accidents.
Haven't you heard? I'm the new face of Mugatu's Derelicte campaign.
Haven't you heard? I'm the new face of Mugatu's Derelicte campaign.
He called, Derek.
He called, Derek.
He can take a crap, wrap it in tin foil...
He can take a crap, wrap it in tin foil...
He changed his name when he went into the fashion business.
He changed his name when he went into the fashion business.
He has become this small country's greatest hope...
He has become this small country's greatest hope...
He is a fashion icon.
He is a fashion icon.
He just went running out of here. I couldn't stop him.
He just went running out of here. I couldn't stop him.
He knew his career was over, and he couldn't face it.
He knew his career was over, and he couldn't face it.
He recorded everything in case they ever turned on him.
He recorded everything in case they ever turned on him.
He tried to brainwash Derek to kill the Claymation dude.
He tried to brainwash Derek to kill the Claymation dude.
He went home... He's talking about going offto ponder...
He went home... He's talking about going offto ponder...
He's a cool dude. He's trying to help you out.
He's a cool dude. He's trying to help you out.
He's a sweet simpleton who never hurt a fly.
He's a sweet simpleton who never hurt a fly.
He's almost too good looking.
He's almost too good looking.
He's feeling pressure from Pressman...
He's feeling pressure from Pressman...
He's going for it.
He's going for it.
He's got him wide open in the middle ofthe field...
He's got him wide open in the middle ofthe field...
He's got to be extremely dim witted.
He's got to be extremely dim witted.
He's just a punk ass errand boy...
He's just a punk ass errand boy...
He's looking for his all American John De Rosa, the wide receiver...
He's looking for his all American John De Rosa, the wide receiver...
He's not here yet,Jacobim.
He's not here yet,Jacobim.
He's perfect, and you know it. Now make it happen.
He's perfect, and you know it. Now make it happen.
He's ready.
He's ready.
He's so hot right now!
He's so hot right now!
Hello? Derek,you hearing me?
Hello? Derek,you hearing me?
Hello.
Hello.
Here are the nominees for Male Model of the Year...
Here are the nominees for Male Model of the Year...
Here in Malaysia, there is an almost overwhelming sense of euphoria...
Here in Malaysia, there is an almost overwhelming sense of euphoria...
Here, at the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good...
Here, at the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good...
Hey there, Derek... My name is Lil' Kleatus...
Hey there, Derek... My name is Lil' Kleatus...
Hey, bra.
Hey, bra.
Hey, Derek. You rule.
Hey, Derek. You rule.
Hey, everybody! Listen up for a second.
Hey, everybody! Listen up for a second.
Hey, guys, that show is in three hours.
Hey, guys, that show is in three hours.
Hey, Hansel, I'm sorry you didn't get Mugatu's Derelicte campaign.
Hey, Hansel, I'm sorry you didn't get Mugatu's Derelicte campaign.
Hey, I don't want to sleep with you!
Hey, I don't want to sleep with you!
Hey, I got a wacky idea.
Hey, I got a wacky idea.
Hey, I just cut up a couple of canta loupe halves...
Hey, I just cut up a couple of canta loupe halves...
Hey, I just E mailed you all those searches...
Hey, I just E mailed you all those searches...
Hey, Mugatu! Screw you and your little dog too!
Hey, Mugatu! Screw you and your little dog too!
Hey, put that Hansel and Gretel line in your article.
Hey, put that Hansel and Gretel line in your article.
Hey, Steve, how are you doing?
Hey, Steve, how are you doing?
Hey, the results are in, amigo!
Hey, the results are in, amigo!
Hey, you want to hear some great news?
Hey, you want to hear some great news?
Hi, I'm former male supermodel Derek Zoolander.
Hi, I'm former male supermodel Derek Zoolander.
His proposed wage increase could ruin all of us.
His proposed wage increase could ruin all of us.
Hits Kevin Conley, the tight end down in there...
Hits Kevin Conley, the tight end down in there...
Holy moly.
Holy moly.
How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read...
How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read...
How could you have written those terrible things about me?
How could you have written those terrible things about me?
How do you feel, Derek?
How do you feel, Derek?
How do you live?
How do you live?
How many "abo digitals" do you see modeling?
How many "abo digitals" do you see modeling?
How'd that affect you with guys? Did they not want to get busy?
How'd that affect you with guys? Did they not want to get busy?
I am Derelicte!
I am Derelicte!
I am really, really dirty...
I am really, really dirty...
I am vile spew...
I am vile spew...
I believe I might be of service.
I believe I might be of service.
I can "dere lick" my own balls, thank you very much.
I can "dere lick" my own balls, thank you very much.
I can do this, Tyson.
I can do this, Tyson.
I can have that evidence here in 20 minutes.
I can have that evidence here in 20 minutes.
I can't get over...
I can't get over...
I can't help you, lady... I don't know nothing about Mugatu...
I can't help you, lady... I don't know nothing about Mugatu...
I can't stand Hansel!
I can't stand Hansel!
I can't turn left.
I can't turn left.
I care desperately about what I do...
I care desperately about what I do...
I caught my reflection in a spoon while I was eating my cereal...
I caught my reflection in a spoon while I was eating my cereal...
I did.
I did.
I dig the bungee... For me, it'sjust the way I live my life...
I dig the bungee... For me, it'sjust the way I live my life...
I do not like snoopy reporter with lack of fashion sense.
I do not like snoopy reporter with lack of fashion sense.
I don't care what it takes. Get him back..
I don't care what it takes. Get him back..
I don't care what the date says.
I don't care what the date says.
I don't care what the traffic is like.
I don't care what the traffic is like.
I don't even know what they... What do they look like?
I don't even know what they... What do they look like?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know. Maybe I felt a little threatened or something...
I don't know. Maybe I felt a little threatened or something...
I don't know. People who need help.
I don't know. People who need help.
I don't plan on starting now.
I don't plan on starting now.
I don't want to be alone tonight.
I don't want to be alone tonight.
I don't want to hang out, okay?
I don't want to hang out, okay?
I freakin' worship you, man.
I freakin' worship you, man.
I got the results on the name check you asked for on Jacobim Mugatu.
I got the results on the name check you asked for on Jacobim Mugatu.
I got two words foryou, sugar... Zip disk.
I got two words foryou, sugar... Zip disk.
I got your back!
I got your back!
I guess I have a lot of things to ponder.
I guess I have a lot of things to ponder.
I guess so.
I guess so.
I hate Hansel! Hansel, Hansel! Everywhere I look! Hansel!
I hate Hansel! Hansel, Hansel! Everywhere I look! Hansel!
I have a pre runway party to attend, if you'll excuse me.
I have a pre runway party to attend, if you'll excuse me.
I have a vision.
I have a vision.
I have an idea.
I have an idea.
I have negotiated my butt off, Giorgio.
I have negotiated my butt off, Giorgio.
I have something really important to talk to you about.
I have something really important to talk to you about.
I hear a lot of words like "beauty"and "handsomeness"...
I hear a lot of words like "beauty"and "handsomeness"...
I hear you,Jaco.
I hear you,Jaco.
I heard some mad stories about this kid. He's too limber.
I heard some mad stories about this kid. He's too limber.
I hope you're finished touching your roots...
I hope you're finished touching your roots...
I invented it!
I invented it!
I invented the piano key necktie!
I invented the piano key necktie!
I just can't tell you how much this means to me...
I just can't tell you how much this means to me...
I just couldn't...
I just couldn't...
I just thank the Lord she didn't live to see her son as a mermaid.
I just thank the Lord she didn't live to see her son as a mermaid.
I just thought the way you handled losing that award to Hansel...
I just thought the way you handled losing that award to Hansel...
I just want to wish you good luck.
I just want to wish you good luck.
I knew it was a joke, Meekus. I just didn't get it right away.
I knew it was a joke, Meekus. I just didn't get it right away.
I know it was you, Maury.
I know it was you, Maury.
I know it was you...
I know it was you...
I know that hand.
I know that hand.
I know that hand.
I know that hand.
I know, right? Riding in on that scooter like he's so cool.
I know, right? Riding in on that scooter like he's so cool.
I know. I turned left!
I know. I turned left!
I live it on the edge, where I gotta be...
I live it on the edge, where I gotta be...
I love that kid. Dumb as a stump, but I love him.
I love that kid. Dumb as a stump, but I love him.
I mean, I'm about to die. Hot bread, Zeke.
I mean, I'm about to die. Hot bread, Zeke.
I mean, I'm about to die. Hot bread, Zeke.
I mean, I'm about to die. Hot bread, Zeke.
I mean, look, lady, you can't just come barging into people's lofts...
I mean, look, lady, you can't just come barging into people's lofts...
I mean, maybe I could even have my own institute.
I mean, maybe I could even have my own institute.
I mean, the soil room. Dirt was flying.
I mean, the soil room. Dirt was flying.
I mean, they love that crap in Malaysia.
I mean, they love that crap in Malaysia.
I mean, where in all of God's green goodness...
I mean, where in all of God's green goodness...
I mean, you've never hired me before, and I've been around...
I mean, you've never hired me before, and I've been around...
I met when I was ice sailing in Finland.
I met when I was ice sailing in Finland.
I need it taken care of soon. I have people to answer to.
I need it taken care of soon. I have people to answer to.
I need you to bring that Zip disk in the den down to the fashion show.
I need you to bring that Zip disk in the den down to the fashion show.
I never wanted anything from you.
I never wanted anything from you.
I saw you this afternoon, dum dum.
I saw you this afternoon, dum dum.
I stings me like a fissure in my ass, but you're right.
I stings me like a fissure in my ass, but you're right.
I suggest you and your Kmart Jaclyn Smith Collection outfit...
I suggest you and your Kmart Jaclyn Smith Collection outfit...
I think about Derek every time I design a collection.
I think about Derek every time I design a collection.
I think I'm getting the black lung, Pop.
I think I'm getting the black lung, Pop.
I think they're vain, stupid...
I think they're vain, stupid...
I think we should get naked.
I think we should get naked.
I think we've found our solution, Ballstein.
I think we've found our solution, Ballstein.
I think you call that love, D Bone.
I think you call that love, D Bone.
I thought maybe I could work the mines with you guys.
I thought maybe I could work the mines with you guys.
I thought someone was gonna be reading our "eugoogoly"
I thought someone was gonna be reading our "eugoogoly"
I used to do my own makeup styling and tailoring.
I used to do my own makeup styling and tailoring.
I want people to know how funny I can be.
I want people to know how funny I can be.
I want to do something meaningful with my life, Maury...
I want to do something meaningful with my life, Maury...
I want you to relax...
I want you to relax...
I wanted to make a new life for myself.
I wanted to make a new life for myself.
I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree...
I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree...
I was the fat kid in my class.
I was the fat kid in my class.
I was the one that all the pretty girls used to make fun of.
I was the one that all the pretty girls used to make fun of.
I was whack.
I was whack.
I was whack.
I was whack.
I was...
I was...
I wasn 't like every other kid, who dreams about being an astronaut...
I wasn 't like every other kid, who dreams about being an astronaut...
I won't let you down. I promise.
I won't let you down. I promise.
I would like to take this oppor...
I would like to take this oppor...
I'd like to announce my retirement from the male modeling profession.
I'd like to announce my retirement from the male modeling profession.
I'd look at these women...
I'd look at these women...
I'll download the files, and we'll take the information to the police...
I'll download the files, and we'll take the information to the police...
I'll get it, ma'am.
I'll get it, ma'am.
I'll go on. Dallas, Texas, 1963.
I'll go on. Dallas, Texas, 1963.
I'll round up the troops here.
I'll round up the troops here.
I'm "shvitzing" like a "shmedrik" with all these lights.
I'm "shvitzing" like a "shmedrik" with all these lights.
I'm afraid of the radiation.
I'm afraid of the radiation.
I'm done,Jaco. I got a prostate the size of a honeydew...
I'm done,Jaco. I got a prostate the size of a honeydew...
I'm fine. I've done this a thousand times.
I'm fine. I've done this a thousand times.
I'm going back home. I need to get in touch with my roots.
I'm going back home. I need to get in touch with my roots.
I'm gonna take these kids over to the George Washington Bridge...
I'm gonna take these kids over to the George Washington Bridge...
I'm gonna take you to my apartment. You can stay there until I get back.
I'm gonna take you to my apartment. You can stay there until I get back.
I'm just a kid who wants you to know the truth about child labor laws...
I'm just a kid who wants you to know the truth about child labor laws...
I'm not an ambi turner.
I'm not an ambi turner.
I'm not gonna sit here with both of you and discuss my sex life or...
I'm not gonna sit here with both of you and discuss my sex life or...
I'm not sure. I have to get to Saint Adonis Cemetery.
I'm not sure. I have to get to Saint Adonis Cemetery.
I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being good looking.
I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being good looking.
I'm so tired! No, Todd, not now!
I'm so tired! No, Todd, not now!
I'm sorry I was born with this perfect bone structure.
I'm sorry I was born with this perfect bone structure.
I'm sorry I was whack.
I'm sorry I was whack.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I know it came off kind of harsh.
I'm sorry. I know it came off kind of harsh.
I'm sorry. Please, go ahead. My mistake.
I'm sorry. Please, go ahead. My mistake.
I'm sure Hansel's heard of styling gel. He's a male model.
I'm sure Hansel's heard of styling gel. He's a male model.
I'm sure there are a lot of people out there who can't turn...
I'm sure there are a lot of people out there who can't turn...
I'm working right now. This...
I'm working right now. This...
I've been in on it for 30 years.
I've been in on it for 30 years.
I've been thinking a lot about that bulimia thing...
I've been thinking a lot about that bulimia thing...
I've been trying to reach you for a week.
I've been trying to reach you for a week.
I've been trying to tell you you've been missing for a week.
I've been trying to tell you you've been missing for a week.
I've never even been to Mount Vesuvius.
I've never even been to Mount Vesuvius.
I've tried bribes, I've tried gifts. I even sent him some pet oxen.
I've tried bribes, I've tried gifts. I even sent him some pet oxen.
If I can create a basic disguise for us...
If I can create a basic disguise for us...
If I could just have a moment of your time, please, sir.
If I could just have a moment of your time, please, sir.
If I tell you anything else, this guy's gonna kill me.
If I tell you anything else, this guy's gonna kill me.
If Malaysia goes, what is next?
If Malaysia goes, what is next?
If nobody has any objections...
If nobody has any objections...
If there's anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us...
If there's anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us...
If they can't even fit inside the building?
If they can't even fit inside the building?
If you go, they'll make you kill that Eurasian dude.
If you go, they'll make you kill that Eurasian dude.
If you want answers, come to Saint Adonis Cemetery now...
If you want answers, come to Saint Adonis Cemetery now...
In the computer.
In the computer.
In the winter '95 International Male catalog...
In the winter '95 International Male catalog...
In your little blue suit and your spiky black hair... Kill!
In your little blue suit and your spiky black hair... Kill!
Incredibly popular item at the time.
Incredibly popular item at the time.
Inspired by the very homeless, the vagrants...
Inspired by the very homeless, the vagrants...
Instead of doing that, I'm gonna try to figure out a way into Maury's...
Instead of doing that, I'm gonna try to figure out a way into Maury's...
Into the eye sockets ofthe fashion world...
Into the eye sockets ofthe fashion world...
Is you consider me the best actor slash model...
Is you consider me the best actor slash model...
It doesn't mean that we can't die in a freak gasoline fight accident.
It doesn't mean that we can't die in a freak gasoline fight accident.
It is a fashion, a way of life...
It is a fashion, a way of life...
It pulls back the skin on your forehead...
It pulls back the skin on your forehead...
It was an awkward phase.
It was an awkward phase.
It was in the fall 1973 Bulova watch catalog.
It was in the fall 1973 Bulova watch catalog.
It was in the fall 1973 Bulova watch catalog.
It was in the fall 1973 Bulova watch catalog.
It was like, whoa, look out!
It was like, whoa, look out!
It was so courageous.
It was so courageous.
It was. I was totally fine.
It was. I was totally fine.
It would have to be the first time I went through the second grade.
It would have to be the first time I went through the second grade.
It'll all be over soon.
It'll all be over soon.
It'll be your glorious comeback.
It'll be your glorious comeback.
It's "Relax"!
It's "Relax"!
It's a problem I had since I was a baby.
It's a problem I had since I was a baby.
It's a walk off.
It's a walk off.
It's almost 7::00. I gotta go.
It's almost 7::00. I gotta go.
It's almost like the new afro for the white man, but it's beautiful.
It's almost like the new afro for the white man, but it's beautiful.
It's almost like there's a light around him...
It's almost like there's a light around him...
It's beautiful.
It's beautiful.
It's designed for deep, deep relaxation.
It's designed for deep, deep relaxation.
It's like he just appeared out of the blue.
It's like he just appeared out of the blue.
It's like, "ex squeeze" me, but have you ever heard of styling gel?
It's like, "ex squeeze" me, but have you ever heard of styling gel?
It's Maury.
It's Maury.
It's me.
It's me.
It's not important.
It's not important.
It's not up to you. At the proper moment, they'll triggeryou.
It's not up to you. At the proper moment, they'll triggeryou.
It's not very well ventilated down there.
It's not very well ventilated down there.
It's nowhere near ready.
It's nowhere near ready.
It's okay.
It's okay.
It's pretty weird. It seems like all of Mr. Mugatu's models...
It's pretty weird. It seems like all of Mr. Mugatu's models...
It's so simple.
It's so simple.
It's that a male model's life is a precious, precious commodity.
It's that a male model's life is a precious, precious commodity.
It's that damn Hansel!
It's that damn Hansel!
It's the Cheryl Ladd Collection, and I got it at J.C. Penney.
It's the Cheryl Ladd Collection, and I got it at J.C. Penney.
It's the concept that a photo might steal a part of your soul.
It's the concept that a photo might steal a part of your soul.
It's time to set things straight.
It's time to set things straight.
It's weird. I couldn't get any info on him before 1995.
It's weird. I couldn't get any info on him before 1995.
It's when you throw up after every meal.
It's when you throw up after every meal.
J ust do it al ready!
J ust do it al ready!
Jaco, I hearyou, but the kid's mixed up.
Jaco, I hearyou, but the kid's mixed up.
Jig's up, Mugatu. Everything they're saying is true.
Jig's up, Mugatu. Everything they're saying is true.
Just a nice, warm, happy time...
Just a nice, warm, happy time...
Just falling... I'll never forget the terror.
Just falling... I'll never forget the terror.
Just give in to the power of the tea.
Just give in to the power of the tea.
Just one minute of your time, please, sir!
Just one minute of your time, please, sir!
Just relax...
Just relax...
Just remember, relax.
Just remember, relax.
Just so long as you can make a name foryourself as a journalist...
Just so long as you can make a name foryourself as a journalist...
Just thinking about it was the most rewarding experience I've ever had.
Just thinking about it was the most rewarding experience I've ever had.
Just unbelievable, skinny women.
Just unbelievable, skinny women.
Karate chop! Bad, man! Awful man!
Karate chop! Bad, man! Awful man!
Katinka, thought you might want to know...
Katinka, thought you might want to know...
Kennedy had just put a trade embargo on Cuba...
Kennedy had just put a trade embargo on Cuba...
Kids as young as five could work as they pleased...
Kids as young as five could work as they pleased...
Kill naughty man!
Kill naughty man!
Le Tigre's a lot softer. It's a bit more of a catalog look.
Le Tigre's a lot softer. It's a bit more of a catalog look.
Lee Harvey Oswald was not a male model.
Lee Harvey Oswald was not a male model.
Let him speak for himself. Would you like to see the prime minister...
Let him speak for himself. Would you like to see the prime minister...
Let me show you...
Let me show you...
Let this wonderful '80s classic soothe you...
Let this wonderful '80s classic soothe you...
Let's get back to the reason that we're really here.
Let's get back to the reason that we're really here.
Let's get this model on his way!
Let's get this model on his way!
Let's go! Vagrants and whores, you're wanted in Makeup!
Let's go! Vagrants and whores, you're wanted in Makeup!
Let's go. Open up.
Let's go. Open up.
Let's keep moving.
Let's keep moving.
Let's not lose our cool. Then we're no better than the machine.
Let's not lose our cool. Then we're no better than the machine.
Let's take a walk.
Let's take a walk.
Like a caterpillar becomes a butterfly...
Like a caterpillar becomes a butterfly...
Like you didn't know it was a joke.
Like you didn't know it was a joke.
Listen to your friend Billy Zane.
Listen to your friend Billy Zane.
Listen, 50 percent of my inventory is manufactured...
Listen, 50 percent of my inventory is manufactured...
Listen, Matil.
Listen, Matil.
Listen. It's not like we thinkwe're actually in a control tower...
Listen. It's not like we thinkwe're actually in a control tower...
Look out! She's got an egg!
Look out! She's got an egg!
Look out! Tushy squeeze!
Look out! Tushy squeeze!
Look, I gotta go pee...
Look, I gotta go pee...
Look, maybe you could do me a favor.
Look, maybe you could do me a favor.
Look, without Derek Zoolander, male modeling wouldn't be what it is.
Look, without Derek Zoolander, male modeling wouldn't be what it is.
Lucky for you, there is no dress code.
Lucky for you, there is no dress code.
Lucky for you, there is no dress code.
Lucky for you, there is no dress code.
Made me want to be a model.
Made me want to be a model.
Made you throw up and feel bad about yourself.
Made you throw up and feel bad about yourself.
Magnum!
Magnum!
Magnum? That's intriguing. Can I see that?
Magnum? That's intriguing. Can I see that?
Making him the guest ofhonor at tonight's show...
Making him the guest ofhonor at tonight's show...
Male modeling has had a shadow cast over it by one man...
Male modeling has had a shadow cast over it by one man...
Male models are genetically constructed to become assassins...
Male models are genetically constructed to become assassins...
Man, that was close... I can't believe Maury's in on it too...
Man, that was close... I can't believe Maury's in on it too...
Martial arts good!
Martial arts good!
Mash your cymbals, chimpy! Dance, Derek, dance!
Mash your cymbals, chimpy! Dance, Derek, dance!
Matilda, we've got problems... Derek's already left for the show...
Matilda, we've got problems... Derek's already left for the show...
Matilda, what are you doing here?
Matilda, what are you doing here?
Maury, you've handle every important male model for the last 30 years.
Maury, you've handle every important male model for the last 30 years.
Maybe I was scared, man. You're Derek Zoolander!
Maybe I was scared, man. You're Derek Zoolander!
Maybe next time.
Maybe next time.
Maybe we should be doing something more meaningful with our lives.
Maybe we should be doing something more meaningful with our lives.
Maybe you could do that for a career"
Maybe you could do that for a career"
Me and my friends have been too busy bathing off of St. Barts...
Me and my friends have been too busy bathing off of St. Barts...
Mer man.
Mer man.
Modeling, to me, isn 't just about being good looking...
Modeling, to me, isn 't just about being good looking...
Models help people. They make them feel good about themselves.
Models help people. They make them feel good about themselves.
Moisture is the essence of wetness...
Moisture is the essence of wetness...
Mr. Mugatu! Mr. Mugatu!
Mr. Mugatu! Mr. Mugatu!
Mugatu sucks! Support the prime minister!
Mugatu sucks! Support the prime minister!
Mugatu uses slave labor!
Mugatu uses slave labor!
Mugatu wants you for his new campaign.
Mugatu wants you for his new campaign.
Mugatu!
Mugatu!
Mugatu? If you knew anything...
Mugatu? If you knew anything...
Mugatu's a dick!
Mugatu's a dick!
Mugatu's Derelicte campaign. Sorry you didn't book it.
Mugatu's Derelicte campaign. Sorry you didn't book it.
My entire panty line is made in Vietnam.
My entire panty line is made in Vietnam.
My mistake,Jacobim.
My mistake,Jacobim.
My prostate's flaring up like a frickin' tiki torch.
My prostate's flaring up like a frickin' tiki torch.
My sweet baby never did.
My sweet baby never did.
My sweet baby never did.
My sweet baby never did.
Nice comeback!
Nice comeback!
Ninety two minus sixty three.
Ninety two minus sixty three.
No matter how many friends you lose...
No matter how many friends you lose...
No matter how many friends you lose...
No matter how many friends you lose...
No way. We got 30 years of files right here in this computer!
No way. We got 30 years of files right here in this computer!
No, it's just right. Trust me.
No, it's just right. Trust me.
No, not Derek.
No, not Derek.
No, you rock. When are you gonna drop Magnum on us, buddy?
No, you rock. When are you gonna drop Magnum on us, buddy?
No! Derek. Der, wait.
No! Derek. Der, wait.
No. No, he can't. We don't even know what the tri gger is.
No. No, he can't. We don't even know what the tri gger is.
No... Wie're sending you to a very exclusive day spa...
No... Wie're sending you to a very exclusive day spa...
Nobody can touch Derek. Nobody! I gotta get inside.
Nobody can touch Derek. Nobody! I gotta get inside.
None of them ever made it past 30.
None of them ever made it past 30.
Not as much as I'm worried about Gretel.
Not as much as I'm worried about Gretel.
Not now, Matilda.
Not now, Matilda.
Not one little bit.
Not one little bit.
Not the right time. I need to figure out this trigger...
Not the right time. I need to figure out this trigger...
Not yet. Gotta tame the beast before you let it out of its cage.
Not yet. Gotta tame the beast before you let it out of its cage.
Nothing to worry about at all...
Nothing to worry about at all...
Nothing. I've just been up for a few days...
Nothing. I've just been up for a few days...
Now to the important stuff.
Now to the important stuff.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got an after funeral party to attend.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got an after funeral party to attend.
Now, once you get the info, I want you to E mail it to my office.
Now, once you get the info, I want you to E mail it to my office.
Now, this'll be a straight walk off, old school rules.
Now, this'll be a straight walk off, old school rules.
Obey my dog!
Obey my dog!
Of every pair of underwear sold.
Of every pair of underwear sold.
Offering you ten million plus three percent...
Offering you ten million plus three percent...
Ofthe wretched masses...
Ofthe wretched masses...
Oh, believe me, they'll know. It hits newsstands tomorrow.
Oh, believe me, they'll know. It hits newsstands tomorrow.
Oh, Derek, you did it! That was amazing!
Oh, Derek, you did it! That was amazing!
Oh, hey, Ennui, will you do me a favor?
Oh, hey, Ennui, will you do me a favor?
Oh, hi, Katinka.
Oh, hi, Katinka.
Oh, I couldn't understand why I didn't look like them.
Oh, I couldn't understand why I didn't look like them.
Oh, I thought you were gonna tell me what a bad "eugoogolizer" I am.
Oh, I thought you were gonna tell me what a bad "eugoogolizer" I am.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, my God! Let go of me!
Oh, my God! Let go of me!
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, right. Cool.
Oh, right. Cool.
Oh, this is this fantastic band, the Little Kings...
Oh, this is this fantastic band, the Little Kings...
Oh, yeah? I've never even heard of it.
Oh, yeah? I've never even heard of it.
Oh, yeah? Listen and learn, sweetness.
Oh, yeah? Listen and learn, sweetness.
Oh, yeah. That's a walk off challenge, my friend.
Oh, yeah. That's a walk off challenge, my friend.
Okay, all right, we need a place to hide.
Okay, all right, we need a place to hide.
Okay, all right, we need a place to hide.
Okay, all right, we need a place to hide.
Okay, boys, let's go to work.
Okay, boys, let's go to work.
Okay, if you just want to fool around a little bit...
Okay, if you just want to fool around a little bit...
Okay, that's impossible.
Okay, that's impossible.
Okay, what's a while? Like, eight days?
Okay, what's a while? Like, eight days?
On sale.
On sale.
On sale.
On sale.
On the male models who've appeared in Mugatu campaigns.
On the male models who've appeared in Mugatu campaigns.
Once upon a time. But things change.
Once upon a time. But things change.
One look?
One look?
One look? I don't think so!
One look? I don't think so!
Ooh, you mean, like, like you, like you...
Ooh, you mean, like, like you, like you...
Or cookie dough.
Or cookie dough.
Or did you think I'd be too stupid to know what a "eugoogoly" was?
Or did you think I'd be too stupid to know what a "eugoogoly" was?
Or get out of my building like now!
Or get out of my building like now!
Or having a lot of fun and being really, really good looking...
Or having a lot of fun and being really, really good looking...
Or lack thereof.
Or lack thereof.
Or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way...
Or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way...
Or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way?
Or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way?
Orange mocha frappuccino!
Orange mocha frappuccino!
Ostensibly halting the shipment of Cuban manufactured slacks.
Ostensibly halting the shipment of Cuban manufactured slacks.
Our diverse faculty includes business management teacher...
Our diverse faculty includes business management teacher...
Our little secret, okay?
Our little secret, okay?
Out of power so you can continue exploiting cheap Malaysian workers?
Out of power so you can continue exploiting cheap Malaysian workers?
Pacheco back to pass...
Pacheco back to pass...
People!
People!
Perhaps you'd rather go back to turning out novelty neckties.
Perhaps you'd rather go back to turning out novelty neckties.
Playskool, baby.
Playskool, baby.
Please don't change the subject, Mr. Ballstein.
Please don't change the subject, Mr. Ballstein.
Please. I need... Katinka!
Please. I need... Katinka!
Please. Some male models go left at the end of a runway...
Please. Some male models go left at the end of a runway...
Pop, wait, please!
Pop, wait, please!
Popping and locking, fool!
Popping and locking, fool!
Prancing around in your underwear with your wiener hanging out?
Prancing around in your underwear with your wiener hanging out?
Prime minister ofMalaysia bad!
Prime minister ofMalaysia bad!
Promising to raise the substandard minimum wage...
Promising to raise the substandard minimum wage...
Proud owner of Blue Steel, the look that made him the legend he now is...
Proud owner of Blue Steel, the look that made him the legend he now is...
Put a cork in it, Zane!
Put a cork in it, Zane!
Put a couple of fishhooks on it...
Put a couple of fishhooks on it...
Read your little Time magazine, or whatever it's called.
Read your little Time magazine, or whatever it's called.
Really, really, ridiculously good looking?
Really, really, ridiculously good looking?
Really?
Really?
Relax? The last thing I need to do right now is rela...
Relax? The last thing I need to do right now is rela...
Richard Gere's a real hero of mine... Sting...
Richard Gere's a real hero of mine... Sting...
Right now, this guy is so hot...
Right now, this guy is so hot...
Right.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Roger.
Roger.
Runaways and street hustlers, you're next!
Runaways and street hustlers, you're next!
Scrappy, Luke...
Scrappy, Luke...
Screw him! Hold out for more!
Screw him! Hold out for more!
See, this is exactly what you models do to people.
See, this is exactly what you models do to people.
Seriously. Do you service yourself ten times a day?
Seriously. Do you service yourself ten times a day?
Shame on you how you picked on Derek Zoolander in that story.
Shame on you how you picked on Derek Zoolander in that story.
She'll be your day to day on the campaign.
She'll be your day to day on the campaign.
Sheila, honey, it's me. Listen.
Sheila, honey, it's me. Listen.
Shut up!
Shut up!
Shut, baby, shut!
Shut, baby, shut!
Simpleton who can be manipulated and molded like Jell O.
Simpleton who can be manipulated and molded like Jell O.
Sit down!
Sit down!
So I am just gonna lay it out.
So I am just gonna lay it out.
So I became...
So I became...
So I'm repelling down Mount Vesuvius...
So I'm repelling down Mount Vesuvius...
So long as you can make a name foryourself as a journalist...
So long as you can make a name foryourself as a journalist...
So must you become Derelicte!
So must you become Derelicte!
So put it in one of those Tupperware containers...
So put it in one of those Tupperware containers...
So the powers that be hired John Wilkes Booth...
So the powers that be hired John Wilkes Booth...
So today, ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to take this opportunity...
So today, ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to take this opportunity...
So welcome to chez Hansel.
So welcome to chez Hansel.
So what time is it?
So what time is it?
So what?
So what?
So what? I throw up after lots of meals.
So what? I throw up after lots of meals.
So you want me to sleep in the gutter?
So you want me to sleep in the gutter?
So, do you spend a lot of time working on these looks...
So, do you spend a lot of time working on these looks...
So, um...
So, um...
Sojoin now, because at the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids...
Sojoin now, because at the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids...
Something has got to be done.
Something has got to be done.
Sorry, lady. Not interested.
Sorry, lady. Not interested.
Sounds cool.
Sounds cool.
State.
State.
Stay the hell away from Derek Zoolander.
Stay the hell away from Derek Zoolander.
Sting would be another person who 's a hero...
Sting would be another person who 's a hero...
Sure, I mean, just for touch ups or whatever.
Sure, I mean, just for touch ups or whatever.
Sure. I've been working on Magnum for at least eight or nine years.
Sure. I've been working on Magnum for at least eight or nine years.
Surprise!
Surprise!
Sweet.
Sweet.
Take the goddamn service road and get off before the bridge.
Take the goddamn service road and get off before the bridge.
Talk to me in 30 years.
Talk to me in 30 years.
Tell me something good.
Tell me something good.
Ten minutes. Old Members Only warehouse.
Ten minutes. Old Members Only warehouse.
Than hidden under a stupid hat with a light on it!
Than hidden under a stupid hat with a light on it!
Than just being really, really, really good looking.
Than just being really, really, really good looking.
Thank God I wore underweartoday...
Thank God I wore underweartoday...
Thank you, Derek Zoolander, for saving my life.
Thank you, Derek Zoolander, for saving my life.
Thanks for the freak fest last night"?
Thanks for the freak fest last night"?
Thanks to this homemade hyperbaric chamber...
Thanks to this homemade hyperbaric chamber...
Thanks, Billy. You rock.
Thanks, Billy. You rock.
Thanks, Olaf.
Thanks, Olaf.
Thanks, Paris. I appreciate that.
Thanks, Paris. I appreciate that.
Thanks, Rico. I'll try.
Thanks, Rico. I'll try.
That Blue Steel look he does... Oh, my Gosh, the style and the hair...
That Blue Steel look he does... Oh, my Gosh, the style and the hair...
That Hansel's so hot right now.
That Hansel's so hot right now.
That I try to steer clear of...
That I try to steer clear of...
That is a bit above average.
That is a bit above average.
That my hair looks better done up with gel and mousse...
That my hair looks better done up with gel and mousse...
That really hurt.
That really hurt.
That she male Katinka's not messing around...
That she male Katinka's not messing around...
That was last Friday.
That was last Friday.
That would be my main deterrent in considering a relationship.
That would be my main deterrent in considering a relationship.
That would be my main deterrent in considering a relationship.
That would be my main deterrent in considering a relationship.
That'll do. Early in my career...
That'll do. Early in my career...
That's a lie! Zoolander snapped because he's over the hill!
That's a lie! Zoolander snapped because he's over the hill!
That's bullshit! Listen up, everyone.
That's bullshit! Listen up, everyone.
That's impressive.
That's impressive.
That's my kid.
That's my kid.
That's my Sherpa, Lapsang.
That's my Sherpa, Lapsang.
That's my son.
That's my son.
That's not enough time. It takes months to train an operative.
That's not enough time. It takes months to train an operative.
That's what I'm talking about!
That's what I'm talking about!
That's what I'm talking about!
That's what I'm talking about!
That's why you have some light pattern dryness around your scalp.
That's why you have some light pattern dryness around your scalp.
The big show is in eight days, Derek...
The big show is in eight days, Derek...
The calender was great...
The calender was great...
The center has to be at least...
The center has to be at least...
The crack whores that make this wonderful city so unique.
The crack whores that make this wonderful city so unique.
The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good.
The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good.
The designer's got your nuts in a vise...
The designer's got your nuts in a vise...
The fashion industry has been behind...
The fashion industry has been behind...
The guy had to pull his underwear out of his butt just to beat you.
The guy had to pull his underwear out of his butt just to beat you.
The guy's been a fashion designer ever since.
The guy's been a fashion designer ever since.
The image... nay, the spirit of Derelicte!
The image... nay, the spirit of Derelicte!
The Malaysian must be eliminated, Mugatu.
The Malaysian must be eliminated, Mugatu.
The Malaysian prime minister visits New York in 14 days.
The Malaysian prime minister visits New York in 14 days.
The man has only one look, for Christ's sake!
The man has only one look, for Christ's sake!
The music that he's created... I don 't really listen to it...
The music that he's created... I don 't really listen to it...
The one they don't show you in magazines or the E Channel?
The one they don't show you in magazines or the E Channel?
The original Greek word for model means "misshapen ball of clay..."
The original Greek word for model means "misshapen ball of clay..."
The original model/actor, to do Mr... Lincoln in...
The original model/actor, to do Mr... Lincoln in...
The other day, I was thinking about volunteering...
The other day, I was thinking about volunteering...
The piano key necktie in 1 985.
The piano key necktie in 1 985.
The point is, we need an empty vessel...
The point is, we need an empty vessel...
The rookie sensation who has burned his way...
The rookie sensation who has burned his way...
The trigger! It's "Re"...
The trigger! It's "Re"...
The VH1 Fashion Awards...
The VH1 Fashion Awards...
The VH1 Fashion Awards...
The VH1 Fashion Awards...
The whole thing is in my den in Long Island.
The whole thing is in my den in Long Island.
The world's greatest hand model.
The world's greatest hand model.
Then telling them that they've been in a day spa for a week...
Then telling them that they've been in a day spa for a week...
There have got to be some people out there, just like you...
There have got to be some people out there, just like you...
There he is, three time Male Model ofthe Year...
There he is, three time Male Model ofthe Year...
There is no one else. The show is in ten days, Ballstein.
There is no one else. The show is in ten days, Ballstein.
There it is!
There it is!
There must be an "on" button somewhere.
There must be an "on" button somewhere.
There was a moment last night...
There was a moment last night...
There's no denying Jacobim Mugatu has used cheap Malaysian workers...
There's no denying Jacobim Mugatu has used cheap Malaysian workers...
These ain't no slashes, folks...
These ain't no slashes, folks...
They can gain entry to the most secure places in the world.
They can gain entry to the most secure places in the world.
They're break dance fighting.
They're break dance fighting.
They're gonna bring you down!
They're gonna bring you down!
They're in peak physical condition...
They're in peak physical condition...
They're in the computer?
They're in the computer?
They're in the computer.
They're in the computer.
They're silly and outdated... In the good old days...
They're silly and outdated... In the good old days...
They're the same face!
They're the same face!
Things aren't what they seem.
Things aren't what they seem.
Think about it, Derek.
Think about it, Derek.
Think again.
Think again.
Think, okay? This is important!
Think, okay? This is important!
Thinking about them?
Thinking about them?
This has been an emotional day for all of us.
This has been an emotional day for all of us.
This is disgusting. How could you let this happen?
This is disgusting. How could you let this happen?
This is private property. Nils!
This is private property. Nils!
This is really strong tea.
This is really strong tea.
This is urgent, ma'am. Do you have any...
This is urgent, ma'am. Do you have any...
This Malaysian thing is getting out of hand.
This Malaysian thing is getting out of hand.
This nation was swept...
This nation was swept...
This phone is as much a part of me as...
This phone is as much a part of me as...
Three time Male Model ofthe Year...
Three time Male Model ofthe Year...
Three times bigger than this.
Three times bigger than this.
Time magazine.
Time magazine.
Times have changed. You wouldn't last one day down those coal pits.
Times have changed. You wouldn't last one day down those coal pits.
To announce my retire...
To announce my retire...
To be the first recipient of this beautiful award.
To be the first recipient of this beautiful award.
To help teach underprivileged children to learn how to read.
To help teach underprivileged children to learn how to read.
To kill the prime minister of Malaysia.
To kill the prime minister of Malaysia.
To make his and most of the garment industry's clothes...
To make his and most of the garment industry's clothes...
To me, that's like a vanity, a self absorption...
To me, that's like a vanity, a self absorption...
To off the prime minister of Micronesia.
To off the prime minister of Micronesia.
Too smart. This is a rush job.
Too smart. This is a rush job.
Tripping on acid changed our whole perspective on shit.
Tripping on acid changed our whole perspective on shit.
Trying to reach outer space aliens or something, okay?
Trying to reach outer space aliens or something, okay?
Turn off my phone?
Turn off my phone?
Two minutes, Derek.
Two minutes, Derek.
Ugly protesters bothering beautiful people.
Ugly protesters bothering beautiful people.
Uh, Derek, what people?
Uh, Derek, what people?
Uh, no, I don't think you do.
Uh, no, I don't think you do.
Uh, no, I just had a really late party night last night.
Uh, no, I just had a really late party night last night.
Usually using an auditory or visual Pavlovian response mechanism.
Usually using an auditory or visual Pavlovian response mechanism.
Very thorough, Archie. Thank you.
Very thorough, Archie. Thank you.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Wait! Hansel!
Wait! Hansel!
Wanna bet? And by the way...
Wanna bet? And by the way...
Wanting sex, then changing your mind...
Wanting sex, then changing your mind...
Watch out. Watch... Fix that hem,Jason.
Watch out. Watch... Fix that hem,Jason.
We also hear you're working on a new look. Can you tell us about it?
We also hear you're working on a new look. Can you tell us about it?
We could call it the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good.
We could call it the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good.
We get back on.
We get back on.
We got Buzzy Sullivan, big wave surfer from Maverick's.
We got Buzzy Sullivan, big wave surfer from Maverick's.
We have a serious problem on our hands, Maury.
We have a serious problem on our hands, Maury.
We have to figure out a plan by then.
We have to figure out a plan by then.
We may just be able to sneak into Maury's, undetected.
We may just be able to sneak into Maury's, undetected.
We teach students of all ages...
We teach students of all ages...
We teach you that there's more to life...
We teach you that there's more to life...
We're not actually saying this is the Earth calling you, Matilda.
We're not actually saying this is the Earth calling you, Matilda.
We're running out of time. Capisce?
We're running out of time. Capisce?
We're running out of time. Find them and meet me at the show.
We're running out of time. Find them and meet me at the show.
Welcome to your relaxation time...
Welcome to your relaxation time...
Well, I guess he changed his mind. It's the world's biggest campaign.
Well, I guess he changed his mind. It's the world's biggest campaign.
Well, I guess I showed...
Well, I guess I showed...
Well, I guess I would have to answer your question with another question.
Well, I guess I would have to answer your question with another question.
Well, I guess the look I'm best known for is Blue Steel.
Well, I guess the look I'm best known for is Blue Steel.
Well, there isn't much time. The show's tomorrow night.
Well, there isn't much time. The show's tomorrow night.
Well, to tell you the truth, I was a little hesitant at first.
Well, to tell you the truth, I was a little hesitant at first.
Well, what about you? How do you fit in to all this?
Well, what about you? How do you fit in to all this?
Well, when Maury told me what you were willing to do, I...
Well, when Maury told me what you were willing to do, I...
Well, you go first.
Well, you go first.
Were you looking for a rematch?
Were you looking for a rematch?
What about Fabio?
What about Fabio?
What about Mugatu's exploitation of sweatshop workers in Malaysia?
What about Mugatu's exploitation of sweatshop workers in Malaysia?
What about us? We built this place together.
What about us? We built this place together.
What are you doing here, Derek? I thought you quit the business.
What are you doing here, Derek? I thought you quit the business.
What are you doing, Ballstein?
What are you doing, Ballstein?
What are you gonna do with that?
What are you gonna do with that?
What are you gonna do?
What are you gonna do?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about? He always has it.
What are you talking about? He always has it.
What are you talking...
What are you talking...
What do we do when we fall off the horse?
What do we do when we fall off the horse?
What do you call that?
What do you call that?
What do you mean, Derek? You said Mugatu never hires you.
What do you mean, Derek? You said Mugatu never hires you.
What do you mean?
What do you mean?
What do you want?
What do you want?
What have you done, Derek? Nothing!
What have you done, Derek? Nothing!
What is this?
What is this?
What is this? Where is everyone going?
What is this? Where is everyone going?
What is this? Who are you?
What is this? Who are you?
What kind of spa is this?
What kind of spa is this?
What Maury said I was willing to do foryou.
What Maury said I was willing to do foryou.
What say we settle this on the runway...
What say we settle this on the runway...
What the hell's the matter with you?
What the hell's the matter with you?
What this, the Slashie, mean...
What this, the Slashie, mean...
What with all the intrigue you guys have been dealing with.
What with all the intrigue you guys have been dealing with.
What would you say your trademark is, if you have one?
What would you say your trademark is, if you have one?
What you've stumbled upon goes way deeper than you could ever fathom.
What you've stumbled upon goes way deeper than you could ever fathom.
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What? No, I don't have time for this.
What? No, I don't have time for this.
What? There's an after party?
What? There's an after party?
What's left to ponder?
What's left to ponder?
What's that look like?
What's that look like?
What's that?
What's that?
What's the deal, yo yo?
What's the deal, yo yo?
Whatever, dude. Whatever. Peace. God bless.
Whatever, dude. Whatever. Peace. God bless.
Whatever.
Whatever.
When I met you, you were a junior petite...
When I met you, you were a junior petite...
When she was between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesman...
When she was between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesman...
When suddenly I remember, "Holy shit. Hansel...
When suddenly I remember, "Holy shit. Hansel...
When suddenly I slip and I start to fall.
When suddenly I slip and I start to fall.
When's the seaweed wrap?
When's the seaweed wrap?
Where controversial designer Jacobim Mugatu...
Where controversial designer Jacobim Mugatu...
Where did all the files go?
Where did all the files go?
Where's the last place anyone would ever expect to look foryou?
Where's the last place anyone would ever expect to look foryou?
Which is more meaningful, I think.
Which is more meaningful, I think.
Who am I?
Who am I?
Who are you trying to get crazy with, ese?
Who are you trying to get crazy with, ese?
Who are you?
Who are you?
Who Can't Read Good and Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too...
Who Can't Read Good and Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too...
Who can't turn... turn left.
Who can't turn... turn left.
Who capped Kennedy from the grassy knoll sure as shit were.
Who capped Kennedy from the grassy knoll sure as shit were.
Who cares about Derek Zoolander anyway?
Who cares about Derek Zoolander anyway?
Who couldn't book a goddamn Sears catalog...
Who couldn't book a goddamn Sears catalog...
Who's winning the match?
Who's winning the match?
Whoa, easy. How about a "Good afternoon, Derek and Hansel.
Whoa, easy. How about a "Good afternoon, Derek and Hansel.
Whoa! Yeah!
Whoa! Yeah!
Why do you hate models, Matilda?
Why do you hate models, Matilda?
Why is he sticking his hand in his pants?
Why is he sticking his hand in his pants?
Why you been acting so messed up towards me?
Why you been acting so messed up towards me?
Why you been acting so messed up towards me?
Why you been acting so messed up towards me?
Why'd you have to come back to this damn town?
Why'd you have to come back to this damn town?
Wie're live at the Derelicte show...
Wie're live at the Derelicte show...
Wielcome to Derelicte...
Wielcome to Derelicte...
Will you get me some of that tea that me and Lapsang got...
Will you get me some of that tea that me and Lapsang got...
With a push up bra, you could have a nice rack of lamb going on there.
With a push up bra, you could have a nice rack of lamb going on there.
With more covers in his first year than any rookie model ever...
With more covers in his first year than any rookie model ever...
With spider monkeys for the past two weeks.
With spider monkeys for the past two weeks.
With what? Your male modeling?
With what? Your male modeling?
With your complexion...
With your complexion...
Without much further ado, I give you...
Without much further ado, I give you...
Without their free labor, prices would have gone up tenfold.
Without their free labor, prices would have gone up tenfold.
Working for an international syndicate of fashion designers.
Working for an international syndicate of fashion designers.
Worn by our country's early leaders?
Worn by our country's early leaders?
Would you hold this for me?
Would you hold this for me?
Would you look at the date. Mugatu's Derelicte show is tomorrow night.
Would you look at the date. Mugatu's Derelicte show is tomorrow night.
Wow!
Wow!
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Yeah, baby! That's what I've been waiting for!
Yeah, baby! That's what I've been waiting for!
Yeah, I capisce... Now if I could only "ca piss"'
Yeah, I capisce... Now if I could only "ca piss"'
Yeah, I guess. Derek, please.
Yeah, I guess. Derek, please.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, that too. But you saved the prime minister of Malaysia!
Yeah, that too. But you saved the prime minister of Malaysia!
Yeah, they're definitely in there... I don't know how he labeled them...
Yeah, they're definitely in there... I don't know how he labeled them...
Yeah, well, fortunately foryou, not too many people I know...
Yeah, well, fortunately foryou, not too many people I know...
Yeah, you're cool to hide here.
Yeah, you're cool to hide here.
Yeah, you're Derek Zoolander.
Yeah, you're Derek Zoolander.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. No, I got that. I understand you don't literally mean...
Yeah. No, I got that. I understand you don't literally mean...
Yeah. Think about any photo shoot you've ever been on.
Yeah. Think about any photo shoot you've ever been on.
Yes it is, Derek.
Yes it is, Derek.
Yes, Derek.
Yes, Derek.
Yes!
Yes!
Yippee! Hooray!
Yippee! Hooray!
You always are.
You always are.
You aren't.
You aren't.
You can read minds?
You can read minds?
You couldn't see anything. It was like, whoa, who's that?
You couldn't see anything. It was like, whoa, who's that?
You do a little background check on your Mr. Mugatu.
You do a little background check on your Mr. Mugatu.
You don't have the guts, Kmart!
You don't have the guts, Kmart!
You don't really care too much about guys in our line ofwork.
You don't really care too much about guys in our line ofwork.
You ever use one of these?
You ever use one of these?
You freakin' idiot!
You freakin' idiot!
You got a lot of gifts, but hanging a louie just isn't one of them.
You got a lot of gifts, but hanging a louie just isn't one of them.
You gotta cut me. I can't see. I'm blind out there.
You gotta cut me. I can't see. I'm blind out there.
You gotta get to Maury Ballstein's computer.
You gotta get to Maury Ballstein's computer.
You gotta get your took us back here...
You gotta get your took us back here...
You hate to see something like that at an event like this...
You hate to see something like that at an event like this...
You have 1,200 messages...
You have 1,200 messages...
You have been in a day spa for a week.
You have been in a day spa for a week.
You have no evidence. Han stupid destroyed everything.
You have no evidence. Han stupid destroyed everything.
You is talkin' loco, and I like it.
You is talkin' loco, and I like it.
You know Mugatu's the one designer who's never hired me.
You know Mugatu's the one designer who's never hired me.
You know what could really help you sort through these important issues?
You know what could really help you sort through these important issues?
You know what it's like to be another model in Zoolander's shadow?
You know what it's like to be another model in Zoolander's shadow?
You know what? Can we cut it out with all the "Earth to's," please?
You know what? Can we cut it out with all the "Earth to's," please?
You know, a lot of people said winning this award...
You know, a lot of people said winning this award...
You know, I'd flip through the pages of my mom's Vogue and Glamour...
You know, I'd flip through the pages of my mom's Vogue and Glamour...
You know, Matilda, I'm surprised you're so worried about "Der rock"'
You know, Matilda, I'm surprised you're so worried about "Der rock"'
You learn martial arts...
You learn martial arts...
You make me sick to my stomach, Jaco.
You make me sick to my stomach, Jaco.
You make them feel bad about themselves.
You make them feel bad about themselves.
You may be familiar with the belief that some aboriginal tribes hold.
You may be familiar with the belief that some aboriginal tribes hold.
You may have to start looking for someone else.
You may have to start looking for someone else.
You mean, if you pull the thread, the whole thing will unravel?
You mean, if you pull the thread, the whole thing will unravel?
You must have some kind of a relationship with him.
You must have some kind of a relationship with him.
You oughta remember that. You're a dinosaur.
You oughta remember that. You're a dinosaur.
You rememberyour brother, right?
You rememberyour brother, right?
You think you're too cool for school.
You think you're too cool for school.
You think Zoolander's in trouble?
You think Zoolander's in trouble?
You want to hear something crazy?
You want to hear something crazy?
You want to see the real world of male modeling?
You want to see the real world of male modeling?
You were wrong about my outfit.
You were wrong about my outfit.
You'll find he sold his soul to the devil for a shot at the big time.
You'll find he sold his soul to the devil for a shot at the big time.
You're a killing machine, Derek. They've programmed you.
You're a killing machine, Derek. They've programmed you.
You're a monkey, Derek!
You're a monkey, Derek!
You're going for your fourth Male Model of the Year award.
You're going for your fourth Male Model of the Year award.
You're J.P. Prewitt.
You're J.P. Prewitt.
You're more dead to me than your dead mother.
You're more dead to me than your dead mother.
You're not telling us everything. There's something else, isn't there?
You're not telling us everything. There's something else, isn't there?
You're telling me! For a second there...
You're telling me! For a second there...
You're welcome to hide out here as long as you want.
You're welcome to hide out here as long as you want.
You've done nothing! Nothing!
You've done nothing! Nothing!
Young, hot, brash...
Young, hot, brash...
Your boy Zoolander's rolling.
Your boy Zoolander's rolling.
Your mistake indeed!
Your mistake indeed!
Your work...
Your work...
"Audi what ey"? And when it's over...
"Audi what ey"? And when it's over...
Ah, man. Take it.
Ah, man. Take it.
All right! That's a wrap! Hey, Hansel.
All right! That's a wrap! Hey, Hansel.
Almost 5:.00. What?
Almost 5:.00. What?
And the way Hansel combs his hair. Or, like, doesn't.
And the way Hansel combs his hair. Or, like, doesn't.
Are you nervous? I have butterflies in my basket...
Are you nervous? I have butterflies in my basket...
Be professionally good looking. Right.
Be professionally good looking. Right.
Brint! Huh?
Brint! Huh?
By the way... What?
By the way... What?
Catch you at the teacher's lounge? All right.
Catch you at the teacher's lounge? All right.
Derek, are you in there? Hold your horses!
Derek, are you in there? Hold your horses!
Derek, come on. Come on.
Derek, come on. Come on.
Derek, come on. Come on.
Derek, come on. Come on.
Derek, hang up the phone now! Where am I?
Derek, hang up the phone now! Where am I?
Derek, please open the door! What a cuckoo dream.
Derek, please open the door! What a cuckoo dream.
Derek, what happened in that spa? I don't know.
Derek, what happened in that spa? I don't know.
Derek's chances tonight? Let me tell you something.
Derek's chances tonight? Let me tell you something.
Earth to Brint... Would you guys stop it already!
Earth to Brint... Would you guys stop it already!
Easy, easy. I'm not comfortable talking...
Easy, easy. I'm not comfortable talking...
End of discussion! Easy. Okay, hold on.
End of discussion! Easy. Okay, hold on.
Everything cool, Derek? It's great, Biff. Thank you.
Everything cool, Derek? It's great, Biff. Thank you.
Excuse me, bra. You're excused.
Excuse me, bra. You're excused.
Excuse me? Eventually the thing will unravel...
Excuse me? Eventually the thing will unravel...
Get out of here. Hang in there,J.P.
Get out of here. Hang in there,J.P.
God? God?
God? God?
Good point. Oh. Okay. You know what?
Good point. Oh. Okay. You know what?
Hansel, right here! All right, all right.
Hansel, right here! All right, all right.
Haven't really done it... You haven't done it...
Haven't really done it... You haven't done it...
He is bad... What?
He is bad... What?
He's absolutely right. Thank you.
He's absolutely right. Thank you.
Hello? Hello?
Hello? Hello?
Hey, Derek. Hey, Maurice.
Hey, Derek. Hey, Maurice.
Hey, my man. What's happening?
Hey, my man. What's happening?
Hey, who wants to hear a story? Yeah!
Hey, who wants to hear a story? Yeah!
Honestly? Yes.
Honestly? Yes.
How's Derek, Jr.? He's great.
How's Derek, Jr.? He's great.
I got it. You gotta figure it out...
I got it. You gotta figure it out...
I have to go! See you at 7::00. Hang up!
I have to go! See you at 7::00. Hang up!
I like this song. Of course you do.
I like this song. Of course you do.
I use it for footwear sometimes. Can I see that?
I use it for footwear sometimes. Can I see that?
I'll call him on his phone. He doesn't have it.
I'll call him on his phone. He doesn't have it.
I'm really psyched for the show. Good.
I'm really psyched for the show. Good.
Kickin', Hoss. I'm going monk.
Kickin', Hoss. I'm going monk.
Looks great. I think we got it. All right, Mitch. Thanks.
Looks great. I think we got it. All right, Mitch. Thanks.
Mati lda, hey. Hey, Arch, what's up?
Mati lda, hey. Hey, Arch, what's up?
Matilda Jeffries. Keep pulling the sweater.
Matilda Jeffries. Keep pulling the sweater.
Maury Ballstein, Balls Models. A man who needs no introduction.
Maury Ballstein, Balls Models. A man who needs no introduction.
My head is killing me and... What are you talking about?
My head is killing me and... What are you talking about?
No, he gave it to me. Did you find the files?
No, he gave it to me. Did you find the files?
Now look at you. I can turn left!
Now look at you. I can turn left!
Oh, no. Please, Hansel. Take it. Please.
Oh, no. Please, Hansel. Take it. Please.
Oh, shit. I gotta go. What's going on?
Oh, shit. I gotta go. What's going on?
Oh, snap! A joke.
Oh, snap! A joke.
Oh! Oh, snap!
Oh! Oh, snap!
Or Play Doh. Any kind of dough.
Or Play Doh. Any kind of dough.
Or should I say Jacob Moogberg. What?
Or should I say Jacob Moogberg. What?
Ouch! Oh, I'm sorry.
Ouch! Oh, I'm sorry.
Really? You wanna show Daddy your look?
Really? You wanna show Daddy your look?
Really? That's strange. Yeah.
Really? That's strange. Yeah.
Right, kids? Right!
Right, kids? Right!
So, how'd you manage to escape? Because I'm a hand model, mama.
So, how'd you manage to escape? Because I'm a hand model, mama.
Thanks, Derek. Now, hurry up. Okay.
Thanks, Derek. Now, hurry up. Okay.
That little toad face better show. He will show.
That little toad face better show. He will show.
That's it. Let's go, people!
That's it. Let's go, people!
There's Daddy! Hi. Hey.
There's Daddy! Hi. Hey.
They do as they're told. That is not true.
They do as they're told. That is not true.
Wait a second. What?
Wait a second. What?
Wait! Who are you? Who was that?
Wait! Who are you? Who was that?
Wanna hang out for story hour? Great. Yeah. Let's go.
Wanna hang out for story hour? Great. Yeah. Let's go.
We're a different breed. So why male models?
We're a different breed. So why male models?
What do you want? I'm trying to talk to Mugatu...
What do you want? I'm trying to talk to Mugatu...
What? Hey, are you okay?
What? Hey, are you okay?
What? I can't sleep with you, okay?
What? I can't sleep with you, okay?
What? Yeah, he doesn't have it.
What? Yeah, he doesn't have it.
Who's this? I think I'm falling for Matilda.
Who's this? I think I'm falling for Matilda.
Wie have entry... Okay, guys. I hear you.
Wie have entry... Okay, guys. I hear you.
Yeah. Earth to Matilda.
Yeah. Earth to Matilda.
Yeah. Then I'm gonna tell you the truth.
Yeah. Then I'm gonna tell you the truth.
Yes! Deal with that!
Yes! Deal with that!
Yo, taste my pain, bitch! Huh?
Yo, taste my pain, bitch! Huh?
You had us worried, Derek. Everything's cool.
You had us worried, Derek. Everything's cool.
You know the profile,Jacobim. A beautiful, self absorbed...
You know the profile,Jacobim. A beautiful, self absorbed...
'cause you were all, "I'm sure he's heard of styling gel"...
'cause you were all, "I'm sure he's heard of styling gel"...
'cause your career is kind of just blossoming...
'cause your career is kind of just blossoming...
"Derek Zoolander: a model, idiot"
"Derek Zoolander: a model, idiot"
"Derriere Extraordinaire"'
"Derriere Extraordinaire"'
"Pedro Scialfa"'
"Pedro Scialfa"'
"Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman"'
"Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman"'

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