💬 Muppet Treasure Island (1996)

A bloodthirsty captain and a cutthroat crew

A cook?

A friend you can trust is worth his weight in gold.

A little love power

A little used piece of equipment fails into disrepair

A sailor's blood begins racing

Aboard this exceptionally safe little boat.

Ach du liebe Volkswagen car

Acquaintances.

Actually, Squire, we were hoping to meet your father.

After you jilted me, I took up with this Bernie Flint.

Ah, I knew it. He's furious.

Ah, I make cheese out of you. Come on!

Ah, it were a terrible shame.

Ah, it'll be a bit closer than that. I can't reach it from there.

Ah, me own shipmates, they'll gully me for sure!

Ah, Rizzo, it's not so bad. Angel Marie said that later on,

Ah, that's just a figment of your imagination.

Ah, the wind seems to be freshening.

Ah, very true.

Ah, yeah, but what if you don't have a compass?

Ah!

Ah! Geronimo!

Ah! Ha ha ha ha!

Ah! I heard that! There's someone here!

Aha! A pretty little girl, is it?

Aha! Aha! Ah? Oh!

All hands on deck!

All right, boys.

All right, folks, have your checks made out to rat tours limited.

All right, Jim, lad, where to from here?

All right, let's go. Okay. That's it. Beautiful. Beautiful.

All right, Mr. Bimbo. I didn't know you had such a good singing voice.

All right! All right! Just one small one.

All right. Snip, snip, snip.

All we found was his hat!

Allow me to introduce my pet lobster Polly.

Am I dead?

Am I doomed to wash and dry

And a guy who lives in a bear's finger?

And anybody else to get their mitts on that map!

And as for you!

And beg for deliverance from damnation!

And believe me, lad,

And dig up the treasure.

And gullying hurts, right?

And have no fear

And he hasn't got the bloody map!

And he's got the treasure map.

And I just can't help but wonder

And I know for a fact that it was terribly unsafe.

And I know this life I'm living

And I see us as members of a noble brotherhood

And I will personally finance the voyage for the treasure myself.

And I'll be by your side

And I'm the new cap'n.

And is it a curse I'm under to do it 'till die

And it'll be nay jokin' matter, hose nose.

And it's drawn on a page from the Bible.

And leave your shipmates with nothing.

And let's go find the treasure!

And love you like a son

And make your life bright as the rainbow

And margaritas at the midnight buffet

And me, I could have been a contender

And no one legged son of a bilge rat will...

And now though we're all here

And now we'll be tried for mutiny!

And only Flint, his own self, returned.

And our mates will always be

And oysters in your bed.

And people die by fallin' overboard

And should be feared and hated

And smiles a warm sweet smile

And so, my friends, the sea has claimed another loyal officer and friend.

And softer than the summer rain

And sweep you off your feet

And that's that. This conversation is finished.

And that's what we're proud to be

And the future... Below us.

And their exploding wigs of death!

And then it died.

And they sailed their ship 'cross the ocean blue

And those buccaneers drown their sins in rum

And though we may put into port

And we being the rightful owners.

And we'll share and share alike with you

And we've been given another chance

And when greed and villainy sail the sea

And when you're a professional pirate

And you, Squire Trelawney.

And you'll have to... Negotiate strenuously.

And you'll keep your mind and body sound by working out of doors

And, uh, someone on board

Angel Marie.

Any man caught dawdling will be shot on sight.

Anyway, here's the plan.

Anywhere the wind is blowing

Are creeping open!

Are planning to share the treasure with the likes of us?

Are we with the pirates or the frog captain?

Are you kiddin'? I love you guys!

Are you kidding? Jim is family.

As captain, I order you to give me the map.

As fine a crustacean as a man could ask for.

Au revoir, mon capitaine.

Ave, aye, sir!

Ave. aye.

Aye, aye, sir!

Aye, that it is, Polly. Never trust a silver platter.

Aye! Beware the one legged man! He's the one to fear!

Aye.

Basted with butter!

Beachfront property!

Beaker, stop fooling around.

Bed wetting and a near death experience.

Been stuck at sea so long that we have simply gone bananas

Beggin' your pardon, gentlemen,

Benjamina, I just want you to know that I'm sorry.

Beware runnin' with scissors or any other pointy objects.

Beware, lads!

Beware!

Big fat ugly bug face baby eating O'Brien?

Billy Bones!

Billy Bones! Ah, I'd know that scurvy mug of yours anywhere.

Billy's dead,

Boldly going where no man has gone before.

Bonsoir, mes amis.

Boogie, boogie, boogie!

Boogie!

Boom sha kal a kal Boom sha kal a kal

Boom Sha kal a kal.

Boy, Gonzo, it sounds like you're coming down with a little cold there.

Boys, look at the state of this place!

Bravo, Cap'n.

Breeze ain't blowing and the bird don't ﬂy

Bring forth Boom Sha kal a kal.

Bring her up hard of starboard, helmsman.

But Dead Tom's always been dead.

But destiny could see we deserve

But destiny could see we deserved

But I held your memory

But I thought sailors had talking parrots as pets.

But I'll trick them! I'll shake out another reef and daddle 'em again!

But I'm not Jimmy, Jim, Jimmy, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.

But it makes me sick at heart to sail with the likes of you.

But to the British he's a hero and they idolize him

But when you're a professional pirate

But who has the map now, huh?

But, Captain, we just heard. Long John is planning a mutiny,

But, uh, it's not even his birthday.

By rights, I should be locked up too

By the powers. What a coincidence.

By the way, that Silver fellow may not be trustworthy.

By then, all the fight should be out of 'em.

Bye bye.

Cabin fever has ravaged all aboard

Cabin fever!

Cabin fever! Ah!

Can we get on with this? Get outta here, will ya?

Can we make a rug out of him?

Can't a woman get her beauty sleep anymore?

Can't be my destiny

Can't hear ya. No?

Captain Bones!

Captain!

Captain?

Cast away, men! Be quick now!

Certainly. What are rich, half wit sons for?

Chica chica boom boom chica chica boom boom chic

Chica chica boom chica chica boom boom chic arriba!

Chop, chop!

Chop, chop. Look lively now. The Captain will be here soon.

Closing time!

Come along.

Come back, you cowards!

Come on then, lad. Let's not waste time.

Come on, Jerry! He's just a kid!

Come on, Jim. Don't bother Captain.

Come on, let's go!

Come on, Long John. You could captain this ship.

Come on, mates! The treasure's ours!

Come on, men! It's back to blighty now, lads!

Come on, then, lads.

Come on, we've got to save the Captain!

Come on.

Come on. Fight. Where are you?

Come, Flaubert.

Congeniality.

Considering what's just happened.

Cool.

Couple of dozen noses, if anything weird happens...

Cowabunga!

Cucaracha.

Cute couple.

Danger walks on deck we say what the heck

Dead men tell no tales

Dead Tom's dead!

Deserves deliberation

Did this happen to us

Do si do, step on his toe listen to him squeal

Do we actually believe some bozo's gonna give us a ship

Do you really think the Captain and the Squire

Do you think this will work, Dr. Livesey?

Don't be giving him anymore rum!

Don't get your hopes up, laddie.

Don't tell him anything, Mina. Uh, I beg you!

Don't try to hide, Billy! You know what we want!

Don't wanna spend time with a rat and a...

Don't worry, Captain. We'll watch for him.

Don't ya understand what I been tellin' ya?

Don't you start with me about pirates!

Donate your compass to the treasure hunt and get a full share!

Down!

Dreamin '

Drop him in the drink

Easy, Jim. 'Tis all in good fun.

Easy. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Easy, Rizzo!

Eh, Jimmy?

Eh.

Enjoy your cruise, sir. Next!

Enough of this singin'!

Enough to put your faith in

Even in the China Sea, that's north.

Even old Flinty feared him.

Every man aboard would have killed his mate

Every storm we ride is its own reward

Exactly!

Excuse me, sir, but the bar is closed.

Fall down on your knees

Fantastic, Mr. Arrow. That was beautiful.

Feel so good when everybody feels

Feel the inspiration

Feels like we're really doing it.

Fiddle!

Fight, you idiots!

Find me north out there among them stars.

Five days since we had a breeze.

Flaubert, meet Da Da.

Flaubert! Get away, you stupid anteater! You spoiled my entrance.

Flint hung 'em up there after he gullied 'em

Flint knew an island.

For a bag of guineas or a piece of eight

For lettin' thieves like them aboard this ship.

For the last time,

Gentlemen, may I see you in my cabin?

Get back there, you yellow bellied bilge rats!

Get it? Oysters? Bed?

Get out of my inn, you tattooed miseries!

Gimme that map. Let's go.

Give up?

Give us one more chance.

Go on, out ya go!

Go on.

Go, go, go!

Going somewhere, John John?

Going to allow drinking on this voyage.

Gold and blood, they were Flint's trademarks.

Gonzo? Is that you, Gonzo?

Good day, Mr. Arrow.

Good evening, Bill.

Good night, boys.

Greetings. Moi am Benjamina Gunn.

Guys!

Ha ha ha! See? See?

Ha ha, ho ho!

Ha ha, Silver!

Ha!

Ha! Ha!

Ha! Well, in my galley, you're always welcome to help yourselves!

Half the crew drowned in leaky lifeboats.

Half wit son young Squire Trelawney's here.

Hand it to me like a good lad, will ya?

Has a map.

Has come together against me.

Hawkins.

He died? And this is supposed to be a kids' movie.

He runs this ship, not I.

He was my age when he sailed to China as a cabin boy.

He will return on the feast of St. Lulu.

He wound up a first mate.

He'd leave both behind him that day.

He'd throw a line out the back and let me drag along the bottom.

He'll be by your side

He'll only kill you too. Don't listen to him!

He's coming to kill us.

He's Jimmy, Jim, Jimmy, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.

Head for those cliffs.

Headless Bill.

Heave ho, we'll go

Heh! What an imagination. First pirates, now talking parrots?

Heigh ho and up she rises

Heigh ho, everyone.

Heigh ho, we'll go

Hello, Long John.

Hello! Earth to Jimbo.

Here

Here you go.

Hey, Gonzo, you think he's gonna eat this?

Hey, hey, hey!

Hey, hey, there could be extenuatin' circumstances.

Hey, ho, ho

Hey, ho, ho it's one for all for one

Hey, how does it feel, Captain Hawkins?

Hey, man! I can't figure out what side we're on.

Hey, wait! Where are you taking him?

Hey, when do we eat? My feet are killing me.

Hey, where's my camera?

Hey. Thank you.

Hi yah!

Hi, Jim!

Hiya, guys.

Hmm, hmm.

Hmm, we see you have boom boom sticks.

Hmm?

Hmm? My keys!

Hmm.

Hmm. Ah. Uh, uh.

Hmm. Hmm. The caulking appears tight.

Hmm. I'm starting to worry about this voyage.

Hmm. Take the mousie, then skewer the mousie!

Hoist the sails and sing

Hoo hoo!

Hopping mad!

How comes it gets to be such a pigsty, huh?

How does she bloody do that?

How does she do that?

How I ever let you go

How infortuitous our firearms weren't loaded, Beakie.

How old were you when he died, then?

Howdy, vous, stinky froggy man and friends.

Huh?

Huh? Oh!

Hulla wacka, moo/ah wacka sailor man beware

Hulla wacka, ulla wacka something not right

Hurry, Rizzo!

Hurry! Hurry!

Hurry. Come on. Get in the boat.

I am definitely gonna need bigger pants.

I am Spa'am, high priest of the boars.

I am the ghost of Samuel Arrow.

I believe they prefer visually challenged fiend.

I can't. The Captain wants me.

I could have been a lawyer but I just had too much heart

I could have been a surgeon I like taking things apart

I could have been in politics

I didn't say that, Mr. Arrow.

I don't know about this crew.

I don't know.

I don't want any benefits.

I feel like the world is passing me by

I feel like they're always watchin' us, just waitin' to pounce.

I found the bullets. See? Here they are. They...

I got cabin fever it's burning in my brain

I got cabin fever it's driving me insane

I got cabin fever!

I got cabin fever. I think I lost my grip.

I got it! I got it!

I got the horrors! Give me rum!

I guess the human beings wanna hang out together,

I hope you didn't think I was lying about that.

I just know I was born to lead

I knew your father, Jim. He was a good man.

I know it's you.

I know you're here, Billy.

I know. Come on. We've got to get help.

I learned it from my friends, Mr. Silver.

I left some table scraps in there for your supper.

I look around here and I want to cry

I lost myself when I lost you

I love to hang 'em high and watch their little feet

I love to see 'em cry when they walk the plank

I may even have a future with the NBA.

I mean, Long John's only a cook. How dangerous could he be?

I mean, some family we are.

I mean, you know, uh... If, uh...

I mean...

I never felt like this before.

I prefer to cut a throat

I say we should kill that captain now.

I say we're victims of bad press

I say! This does not look safe!

I say... We should kill him!

I says, let the Captain steer us closer to the island.

I shall tend to my duty and see to it

I should just run off to sea like my father did.

I should've let him live in my finger.

I suppose I will. You have to return to Bristol to stand trial.

I tell you, I'm not a patient man.

I think I smell something burning, no?

I think we're going to need a net.

I was anticipating your whim, sir. Humph.

I was Flinty's first mate! We all were! Blind Pew and me!

I was ﬂoating 'neath the tropic moon

I was on a ship headed for Zanzibar. I got cold feet.

I was wearing her white lace dress.

I were eight when my father died at sea.

I wish we were back at the Admiral Benbow eating table scraps.

I'd hoped it wouldn't come to this, Jim, but

I'd like to get my hands on whoever wrote this script.

I'd rather not, sir.

I'll be careful with it, sir.

I'll be taking it either way, Jim.

I'll break.

I'll never know

I'll put my courage to the test

I'll say. We might have shot somebody.

I'll show you what I think of your curse.

I'll throw you overboard like I did that scurvy mate Mr. Arrow!

I'm a pig! I need commitment!

I'm afraid we shish kebab and barbecue stowaways on this ship.

I'm an easy man. A gentlemen of fortune, says most.

I'm going as fast as I can.

I'm hoping you're willing to give me the map now,

I'm just a ship's cook.

I'm just gonna light a match if you don't mind, here.

I'm not really sure I should be talking about this with you or with anyone.

I'm not sayin' we got problems, uh...

I'm sorry your present didn't work out.

I'm sorry, lad. I were only foolin'.

I'm taller! This is so cool!

I'm tellin' ya, I got a million more just like that.

I'm the only friend you've got in the world now, Jim.

I'm tired!

I've got it too!

I've got the lad's treasure map now.

I've taken the liberty of hiding a few of my best men aboard.

If a second round follows,

If anyone mutinies before I says so,

If he comes pokin' 'round here, you run for me whippety quick!

If I had a life, I'd hate it.

If I had it, my friends and I

If I had that treasure map, I'd be tradin' it for a decent meal.

If it does I'm gonna hide

If it's weird and wild let's go and find it

If that's what you're thinking,

If we found someplace with 10 square meals a day

If you forget that again, there'll be no table scraps for a week!

If you're gonna be the cook on this ship, Mr. Silver,

In exchange for me own life.

Instead of spending every afternoon

Is he bad tempered? The man is a raging volcano

Isn't that exciting?

It can lift you up

It feels like we're finally having an adventure!

It feels so good when everybody feels

It is.

It make the soul and the spirit strong

It means they've taken over the Hispaniola,

It was the first dozen times we heard it.

It will be safe in here, sir.

It would be disastrous.

It's all exaggerated

It's all good fun 'til somebody loses an...

It's all I have of his. Please. Please.

It's as dark a tale as was ever told

It's been six weeks since we left England.

It's coming straight for us!

It's how you look at buccaneers

It's like giving the treasure to us on a silver platter.

It's me, Blind Pew.

It's mine! I'm goin' for that treasure myself!

It's more than you deserve, ya villainous dogs!

It's peelin' paint off of the shuffleboard court.

It's so nauseating!

It's the boat steering thing.

It's the ghost of Captain Flinty.

It's time to sail or sink

It's worth a try, Rizzo.

Jim, Jimmy, Jimmy, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.

Jim, lad!

Jim, they've got Captain Smollett.

Jim! Ah!

Jimmy. Jim. Jimmy, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.

Join us, lad.

Just because we show him Captain Bones' map?

Just doin' my duty, sir.

Just getting dishpan hands

Just kidding.

Just like a family

Just take it all for yourself

Kill Captain Smollett, and you'll have to kill me.

Kill Gonzo, and you'll have to kill me.

Kill Jim, and you'll have to kill me.

Kill Squire Trelawney and Mr. Bimbo,

Kill them all!

Laid down by the brothers of Buckfast Abbey,

Land ho!

Last night you forgot to put out the lantern!

Let danger call my name

Let me tell you now

Let's dig up the treasure together, eh?

Lift you up when you get low

Lollygaggers will suffer his wrath!

Long John shot him!

Long John Silver, at your humble service.

Long John Silver?

Long John to his friends.

Long John, look!

Long John, please don't drop it.

Long John! Long John! Look! The ship!

Look out!

Look!

Look! The wind is back!

Look. It's the Captain and the pig.

Looking back

Looking back I'll never know

Looking for some daft treasure map.

Lost that timber fighting brigands off Madagascar under Admiral Hawke.

Love led us

Love led us here

Love power

Love power There's no higher power

Make it work

Man overboard!

Maniac!

Manly men are we

Many wicked icky things gonna happen tonight

Margaritas at the midnight buffet

Maroonee, temptress and queen of this...

Master Hawkins, may I see you in my cabin, please?

May I help you?

May the wind be ever at your back, Samuel Arrow.

Maybe someday I will.

Maybe they'll ask real nice.

Me, I sails by the stars.

Me!

Mi casa es su casa.

Mind what?

Mmm hmm.

Mr. Arrow, lock those three up for the remainder of the voyage.

Mr. Arrow, over here!

Mr. Arrow's gone overboard, and

Mr. Bimbo! That was some amazing swordplay!

Mr. Samuel Arrow, a wonderful man who

Murder in the air

Mushy mushy! Oh. Lovey dovey!

My boy, why not consider a more challenging career

My father said now, son, this choice

My future looks like nowhere that I want to be

My love for you is deeper than the deep, blue sea.

My mother came all the way from France.

My name is Gonzo, and the guy in your chicken is Rizzo.

Navigating with my father's old compass

Never get involved in politics.

Never. My friend and I will never tell.

No dampness under the gunwale.

No offense meant, gentlemen, sirs. No offense meant.

No one knows to this day who has old Flint's map.

No one maroons me and gets away with it!

No way! You're not takin' me on some crazy treasure hunt!

No, no, no, no! The paper!

No, that's silly. The man who lives in my finger hired the crew, Mr. Bimbo.

No, we gotta take it to Long John. Come on.

No!

No! Outta the way! Get outta the way!

No.

No. We must set an example for this questionable crew.

Nobody told them that it ain't that stuff

None of this would've happened if I'd have given Captain Smollet the...

North trail, split level hut with the pink lawn furniture. You can't miss it.

Not anymore. Mr. Arrow took it and locked it up in the Captain's cabin.

Not bad for an amphibian.

Not so fast.

Now free him at once, you scoundrel!

Now heaven seems so near

Now here we are stuck on the front of this stupid ship.

Now I know that life can take you by surprise

Now I'm as crazy as a loon

Now take Sir Francis Drake the Spanish all despise him

Now take your oars and row away. I never want to see you again, ever.

Now you suffer the wrath of our queen,

Now, get this straight.

Now, I'm not gonna be really patient about this, Benjamina.

Now, isn't that a story worth the hearing?

Now, Jim.

Now, Master Hawkins, I...

Now, tell us where the map is

Now, that gets old Long John to wonderin'.

Now, then.

Now, you run along and do your chores. Go on.

Now. ..

Of all the backwater, no class piles of sand in the ocean,

Of company

Of course, his rich,

Of course. If they were to fall overboard,

Of cutthroats, villains and scoundrels I have ever seen!

Of the lust for treasure and the love of gold

Off to Zanzibar to meet the Zanzibarbarians.

Off to Zanzibar, to meet the Zanzibarbarians.

Oh, aye, and then old Flinty

Oh, aye! A lot!

Oh, aye.

Oh, Beakie, Beakie. Look, look!

Oh, Billy Bones! Trick or treat!

Oh, brother!

Oh, brother. Here they go again.

Oh, don't bother your head about that. You've only told old Long John.

Oh, don't cry for me, Benjamina.

Oh, don't play games with me, lass.

Oh, Gonzo, he seems all right.

Oh, great! Wow! Ha! Ah!

Oh, hell, Jim. I could never harm you.

Oh, hello, chappies. Everyone, this is Dr. Livesey and his assistant, Beaker.

Oh, hey, man, just play the gig

Oh, hey, Rizzo, relax! Don't be so afraid.

Oh, hi, Long John.

Oh, I love it! 'Tis poetry in motion.

Oh, I may be visually challenged, but I can see you're lying.

Oh, I think I've... Oh, no.

Oh, I... I burned my hand. Oh.

Oh, I'm not sayin' our lifeboats are unsafe, sir.

Oh, I'm sorry, Jim. I got a terrible fear of hanging.

Oh, I've gone way beyond afraid.

Oh, it chills me.

Oh, it's okay, Mina. We're together again.

Oh, Jim, Smollett sails by rules and laws.

Oh, Jim.

Oh, let's forget

Oh, love power

Oh, Master Hawkins, you've come to rescue us.

Oh, Mr. Bimbo lives in my finger.

Oh, Mr. Silver, good evening.

Oh, my goodness.

Oh, no!

Oh, no.

Oh, now I understand. That's a brilliant plan.

Oh, oh, oh, Mr. Bimbo, help!

Oh, oh!

Oh, okay. Where will we go?

Oh, please, no! I hate basketball!

Oh, sir, but I can vouch for this crew myself.

Oh, sir, is there anything I can hold for you for safekeeping?

Oh, Smolly,

Oh, Smolly. You saved me.

Oh, sorry.

Oh, sure.

Oh, that is Mr. Arrow, the first mate, a capital fellow.

Oh, that it would, sir.

Oh, that?

Oh, that's great. Heh.

Oh, the red hot gates of hell

Oh, uh, old girlfriend.

Oh, well, sir, they do, of course, until you get them out in the open ocean.

Oh, well...

Oh, what a shame! I'll miss you, lad. That I will.

Oh, what am I gonna do?

Oh, woof.

Oh, yes, and boys,

Oh, yes, indeed.

Oh, yes, John.

Oh, yes!

Oh, yes! My research indicates that pirates are very superstitious.

Oh, yes. Mr. Bimbo told me so.

Oh, you are a good man.

Oh, you needn't be callin' a lowly ship's cook sir.

Oh, you're a fine pair, lads. That you are.

Oh!

Oh! Ah! Oh ho ho!

Oh! Cast me off, Mr. Silver!

Oh! Oh! Oh ho ho ho ho!

Oh.

Oh. Oh, boys. Come join me

Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. You must be the cabin boys.

Okay, all right. So I'm a rat and you're a human being

Okay, I give... Uncle. Uh, I'm dead.

Okay, okay, Okay!

Okay, okay. Now, spread out and find the map.

Okay, where does Mrs. Bluveridge keep the bullets?

On a heading of 179 degrees,

On occasion there may be someone you have to execute

On the deep blue sea

One of Captain Bones' adventures,

One of the jolly boats is missing,

Ooh

Ooh, I love that one.

Ooh!

Ooh! Hey, Long John! Hey! Get us outta here!

Ooh! Jim, what you doing?

Ooh! Ooh, look!

Ooh! Uh, no.

Muppet Treasure Island (1996)
Muppet Treasure Island, released in 1996, is a beloved adventure comedy film that brings the classic tale of Treasure Island to life with the help of Jim Henson's beloved Muppet characters. This colorful production features an exceptional cast including Tim Curry as the dastardly Long John Silver, Kevin Bishop as the young protagonist Jim Hawkins, and the incomparable Muppets like Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, and Gonzo. The film's infectious music is also worth mentioning. With delightful tunes like "Cabin Fever" and "Professional Pirate," you can immerse yourself in this treasure-filled journey by playing and downloading these sounds here.
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