Bad Teacher Edit

A good dicking? Go talk to those guys over there.

A retest on? C'mon.

Aaah! Wally thank you for those kind words, and thank you all.

Aah... Elizabeth, we need to talk. Sure.

About her personality that makes me see the best in me.

About her smile that I would walk a mile for.

Aces...

Adios, bitches!!

Ah, I know I've only been here a year, but there's so much I will miss.

Ah! Dry humpin' the shit out of you. Yeah, Dry Fuck the fuck outta me, Scott.

Ah? Everything okay in here? It's okay, I'm his teacher.

Ahh!! What are you doing rest of day you gonna see your family?

Ahh... Okay thank you, Amy. I'm sure everybody wants to get home so I'm gonna be quick.

Ahh... Yeah I'm gonna go see some people We're having like a big..pot luck so...

All of it.. Pretty much

All right then. See you in the maniano

Almost there.

Almost... done...

Alright folks, can we all settle down for a second?

Alright then, when is his birthday? Mom...

Alright... We'll pick this up again tomorrow.

Alrighty roo...

Alrighty, have a super awesome day, you two.

Also I have an original song.

Always believe.

Amy says "hi" Well she sure calls a lot.

Amy Squirrel, after six short years, Amy is transferring out of the district.

Amy, Do you see this beautiful little glass dolphin figurine?

Amy, hi. Hi, I got you something.

Amy, Stop that Stop it!

Amy, what are you doing here? Scott, talk to the hand.

Amy? I know...

An art form just has died.

And 17.

And a couple bucks for snacks.

And a year later, when he left my mom and moved in with his trainer...

And achieve the highest scores in the state...

And also I might be a little short on rent this month, like a lot short.

And believe me I don't mean you.

And even though I'll never teach again professionally.

And even though you pretty much stop talking to me in fifth grade... I don't care

And I ain't afraid of no ghosts.

And I know I am not perfect. But show me the perfect teacher.

And I met a guy. Oh! Tell me everything.

And I wanna single out I wanna single out one of our own.

And I was never here. You hear me? Fuck.

And I wish that I had gotten to know all of you better.

And I'm happy to announce that the... John Adams Middle School, that's us...

And I'm not gonna tell you why because, it's between me and my doctor.

And I'm not saying that to be mean, I'm saying that to be helpful.

And if she claims it's medicinal, I would demand to see a prescription.

And it goes out to someone very special.

And it's exactly what I told Elizabeth when she told me about this upcoming fake breasts job.

And Lauren Lisman's dad called and he said we should have car wash every weekend.

And lets not forget.. The sleeping with my boyfriend

And my fiance, he cheated on me with his sister

And quite frankly, reckless.

And the nipples... oh... I know

And the superintendent.

And then some... jail time... Jail time!

And this teacher is now $ 5700 richer.

And those... Those kids are there playing with it.

And voila. So...

And we got you a little something.

And we have a quiz tomorrow. What?!!

And when I recover from my surgery...

And you were so embarrassed, and you made me promise never to tell anyone?

Animal Farm? Sasha, that's not even on the syllabus.

Another exciting day in the Principal's office.

Any family money? Yea, you bet?

Anybody else have a problem with that?

Anybody know... anybody know any of my other nick names??

Anyone know where Danny Morebox is? Any more movies in class?

Anyone seen Stand and Deliver? Show hands...

Anyway, actually none of these really matters Umm... I sort of... started seeing somebody.

Anyways, at the orientation I suggested a new system for supervising lunch

Are just using you

Are sensitive. Yes, thank you.

Are we gonna have a problem, me and you?

Are we still on this? She's my everything.

Are you accusing Elizabeth of embezzling from the 7th grade car wash?

Are you fucking kidding me?

As you can see the weight is evenly distributed and there is minimal scar...

As your personal tutor, I guarantee personally that she will get an A.

Ask me how much I feel I'll say... a lot a co...

At Harvard, but...

Austin Market?

Awesome. It's real...

Aww... Come on. Anyone wants extra sticker on their wall star board?

B: Every couple of years we get these cockamamie charges coming in from various parts of the state.

Baby doll... I'm home.

Back to you, Wally.

Bad Teacher

Baloney. You seem... very certain a couple of days ago?

Because Atticus is always the voice of reason and justice?

Because bird symbolize freedom?

Because he... EEEH!!

Because he's a crybaby?

Because... actually I was really hoping we could be more than just across the hall mates

Before I met you...

Bhuhhrr!! Loser...

Boy, Elizabeth... You missed a boat load of stuff

Boy, I am looking forward to bringing my brand of genie energy...

Bring him in.

Bringing these magazines to school is not the way you are going to make friends, those 8th Grade boys...

But also to one of our own.

But I also use a variety of other multimedia techniques.

But I am not racist. I voted for Obama, you can quote me on that in your article.

But I just wanna say, now you're back, I just know you are gonna get your teaching on

But I stay above all that stuff.

But I'm so sad..it's because your relationship ended.

But if I see these again, I'm gonna call your parents.

But if you could just keep an eye on Morgan? My wife and I would really appreciate it.

But sadly also to say goodbye to one of our faculty members.

But she also cares a lot too.

But she doesn't care.

But still be touching the other one and then you just choose... Text book.

But then there were others like... just... Like hopeless or scary... so I... count me out.

But they're also so ferocious. So ferocious.

But they're also so majestic. They are beautiful creatures.

But when the superintendent personally ask you to work at one of the worst school in the state?

But you know in a lot of ways I think that movies are the new books.

But you seem like such a wild man Carl...

But you'd have to wait for dessert we have a real treat.

But, between four classes and planning a wedding my plate was full

But, we're working really hard.

Buuhhr! Loser.

C'mon everybody settle down

Call me when Lebron has six championships. That's the only argument?

Can I be honest with you? Of course.

Can I have your panties? I'm not wearing any..

Can I help you?

Can I tell you guys what I hate?

Carl Halabi. The state test.

Carl..I'm gonna need you to pass the fuck out.

Cause I have that.

Cause its gonna be a crazy ride.

Check it Check my urine.

Cheers.

Class dismissed.

Class dismissed. Excuse me, Miss Halsey.

Clean! Haa! I told you.

Come on Lynn, you need to loosen up and live a little. When's the last time you had a good dicking?

Come on, guys. There's a wig missing.

Come on.

Come on. C'mon c'mon c'mon...

Come on. You come on...

Come on...

Congratulations, Miss. Halsey.

Cool, see ya.

Correct... here.

Course, you know what scares me the most, Wall?

Crews announce tour for the world geography through current events, we may have a way over in civics, so buckle up

Damn it Mom! I told you I could handle this. I just want to ask her something.

Damn it! Squirrel... I am not going to have a repeat of 2008!

Desk?

Did I hear you were showing a movie this morning on the first day of school?

Did you ever think that maybe... Save it doll face you can explain it all tomorrow to the principal.

Did you find the boys okay? Was it a good drive? Great drive.

Did you find your Prince Charming?

Did you or did you not give her a copy of the state test?

Did you?

Do not do that with your mouth.

Do we really wanna tell our young people...

Do you have 10 grand? Nope.

Do you have a second?

Do you have any music Carl? I have the Internet radio.

Do you have any proof other than what one student thought she saw?

Do you have anything to drink?

Do you have anything to drink?

Do you understand?

Don't be weird, and take this off never fucking wear it again, what are u, crazy?

Don't flinch... seriously... You and you... hold his arms down.

Don't let me leave. Oh! Please don't.

Don't throw at her Throw through her.

Don't worry Amy... We'll get you the help you need.

Don't worry, you were... kind of a long bolf last year and so... busy planning the... wedding

Don't... Stop fucking with my car.

Dr. Vogel, best hands in Chicago.

Easy Easy does it, easy...

Eat, Pray, Love? This is my favourite book too.

Eh..Everything. You wanna know what turns me on?

Elizabeth Hey, Russell

Elizabeth, don't let the bed bugs bite

Elizabeth, even though you are only with us for one short year...

Elizabeth, I am so proud of you.

Elizabeth, I just want to thank you again for stepping in today, you really saved us here.

Erotico.

Ev ery thing.

Even if it made me unpopular.

Even your forehead is sexy.

Everything okay with Garrett? No, it's not

Except abortion, of course.

Extension 777.

Feels it's all happening so quickly.

Fine. It's about... your... ttt.

For I'm all about that.

For me to see one of this year's tests.

For second, an extra set of hands to make sure the implants are settling properly.

For supplies and whatever.

Forever...

Forget him, at least now you can stop worrying about him and be the best teacher you can be..

Four dogs? Four Dobermans.

Four scores, seven years ago.

From now on, my full time job is finding a guy who's gonna take care of me

Fruit Roll Up?

Fuck your scooter and fuck Marjorie.

Fuck!

Fuck!

Fuck!! What? Just go.

Fucking troll. Did you call my name?

Garrett Portman, I was a kid from an old boys school.

Garrett, why don't you run and get some of your new poetry... I don't want to hear it

Get out!

Get your ass back here.

Get yourself hot coz I'm gonna suck your dick like I'm mad at it.

Give me a nug... I'll go smoke it in my car.

Giving each other the gift of these bodies.

Go talk to them. What am I gonna talk about?

Go to class.

God damn it! And I'm hearing about this now?

God damn it! We are done here.

God I pray for that.

God, it is so hard on my salary to have to pay for my own supplies

God, you know we should go get a drink tonight I feel like getting drunk

God! Wow! Yea... these are amazing. Thank you.

God... I'm so embarrassed. Don't be shy, marbles.

Good afternoon, Illinois standard student test How may I direct your call?

Good eye

Good luck with that.

Good Now who has the answer to my question?

Good, now...

Good. Good okay...

Goods... we're gonna go get some baked goods.

Gosh! Its been such a mess this week. You know, Just working myself to the bone.

Gosh!! I never loose my keys.

Gotcha! Thanks Wally, for bringing that up.

Great kid, so pre cautious. I just wish Morgan's grades were reflected.

Great... great!

Gross...

Guess I deserve that one..? Yea, you must certainly did

Guys, c'mon settle down.

Guys, I'm really sorry I have to eat and run I gotta head over to the shelters so..

Had some fun, got some cool souvenirs But those guys are not looking to settle down

Hand him the envelope. I'm gonna need a couple bucks for gas.

Have fun. Yea, You're not seeing anyone now, right?

He thinks you're bad news. I know women like you.

He was with another man. Shut the front door!

He's an idiot. Yea, he's a fuckin' moron.

Hello titties...

Here I go... Almost.

Here is the deal man... I cannot keep sugar coating this for you.

Here we go, well its been another great year here at JAMS.

Here you go... 1%... Surprise!

Here, I'll walk you. Man..Everyone is so nice around here.

Hey can we go somewhere and talk?

Hey hey... Hey!! go to class.

Hey Welcome back.

Hey, aah!..You're not gonna teach again next year, are you?

Hey, Elizabeth. Hey Lynn, how was your summer?

Hey, Elizabeth..Listen, since Amy's transferring, maybe the two of us can start over.

Hey, guys. Heyy.

Hey, I'm sorry to interrupt you guys, but... I couldn't help it over hear your conversations.

Hey, kids. Hey...

Hey, Mr. Delacorte, yes!

Hey, they don't make songs like this anymore, right?

Hey, uh.. may be too soon, but you wanna like..grab a bite or something sometime

Hey, You better not take it for a joyride.

Hey, you in the cape You're up first. Let's go

Hey, you wanna grab lunch later? Oh! Oh sure, yea, my treat.

Hey... I'm Just trying to make conversation.

Hey... Let's do that again.

Hey... Why are they closed? It's Christmas?

Hi, I'm a math terrorist with close ties to algebra

Hi, I'm Morgans dad.

Hi, I'm Sasha Abernathy, My mother baked this cookies for you..

Hi, I'm Sashas mother.

Hi, my name is Elizabeth Halsey. Any questions?

Hi, my name is Marjarie Goodman and I'm calling from the Chicago Tribune.

Hi, there... you look like Losty MC Losterson...

His name is Simon and he lives in the Cayman Islands...

Hit her! Hit her!

Hmm... some clips, maybe.

Hold it in. Just blow it out Hold it in. Blow it out.

Hold on a sec...

Holy fuck! I thought she was never gonna leave.

Holy shit! Alright, let's do this.

Honey, happy birthday

Hopeless.

How do I know what you heard?

How does she know she doesn't like it if she has never tried it before?

How many dogs do you have? Four.

How much? $ 5700.

How would you like to pay?

Huh fuck you... fuck... You like that? Stop kicking it... You stop fucking kicking it.

Huh... no I might, I probably going to sit in the back, maybe leave early

I actually just got out of a relationship. Catherine

I already got shot on the face.

I also said no... Okay cool, well its been awesome

I am a little concerned at the importance you're placing on movies.

I am a teacher.

I am so excited we're gonna be across the hall mates.

I am the new sub. Welcome welcome.

I can't believe you let her take advantage of you like that.

I could just talk to her and tell her how I feel

I dare you. I'm not afraid of your dare, Fabrigo.

I did give her some quotes for her article.

I did, because... umm...

I do not know how to say this. I'm a kind of nervous.

I don't date coworkers. I wont tell anyone

I don't know what you heard but I don't need muff pie(vagina)

I don't know, it's just not me...

I don't know. Maybe I was a bad person in an other life.

I don't know... I like it here.

I don't know... It's the only thing I'm good at

I don't love you?

I don't think that you're Amy's type.

I don't wanna run for congress. I wanna be President.

I don't!

I find these kind of accusations troubling.

I found him hooking up with an eighth grader from another school. She was jerking him off.

I found him in bed with somebody else. Oh my Gosh.

I guess I should begin by saying that my statement from earlier in the week was not true.

I had many jobs when I lived here in New Salem.

I hate it.

I hate it.

I have a bumper sticker that says that. No way?

I have a prescription and everything.

I have been listening to you whining about opera for the last year.

I have weapons of maths instruction.

I hope you haven't spent that bonus check on anything because you're about to give it back.

I just love people who are so passionate about what they do... it's so inspirational.

I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank the guys from Period 5 for letting me join the band and.

I knew it.

I knew she'd understand.

I know right? Can you tell me where room 107 is?

I like your tits... Ask my roommate.

I love Chase Rubin Rossy. Great.

I love how his eyes sparkle when he smiles. I wanna sit on his face.

I love Internet radio.

I love you, Chase. I wanna yell it from the mountain tops.

I loved it and I usually hate poetry.

I mean if someone told me at the beginning of the year that you... 'you'... will get the bonus...

I mean not "drunk" drunk, strong buzz still be able to drive.

I mean, sometimes you talk to people and... Thank you.

I might get flown to Kansas City for their Fashion Week

I need that test!

I need you to go to this guy's office and scare the shit out of him.

I never... We're in the middle of a lesson.

I only had this once a day... If I'm lucky.

I prefer to think of it as two people with amazing bodies...

I remember the Chase that wrote me a card.

I share her with Greg across the way Greg across is actually the guy who got me into spinning.

I stole her desk. You can check my urine.

I tell you what... why don't you just send me memo and if I have any questions, I'll find you.

I think I might be worth your while.

I think it's about time you realize, that the whole world's just...

I think you're pretty great too. Thanks. It's Amy.

I thought it was poetry slam night.

I thought it would be heavier.

I thought that I was doing it for all the right reasons.

I thought the teachers were supposed to get the apples

I thought you were a nurse.

I told her, Gaby if you're not happy with yourself, you cant expect others to be happy with you.

I took off my shoes? Oh Carl...

I used movies as one of my tools

I walking on. Walking on is number 1 worst thing you should probably do.

I wanna fuck you against the desk

I wanna fuck you baa side desk

I want everyone to give a big round of applause.

I want my ring back.

I was gonna get drunk and mock them. Sounds fun, actually

I was hoping to see it sooner. I'm on a bit of a deadline.

I was just going over some stuff for tomorrow.

I was just wondering whats your plans were for the state test?

I was that hot girl, hotter... even and I would never have gone out with you.

I was thinking that I wanna get more involved.

I wasn't always president. Oh!! no!

I worked my ass off for this school.

I'll be damned.

I'll call you from the hotel. Bye, Amy.

I'll let you know, next time I go. Not that fun.

I'll probably won't go either.

I'll see you tomorrow then. Good night.

I'll take two

I'll take you there. Oh. You don't have to do that.

I'll tell you what I know... a kid who wears the same gymnastic sweat shirt 3 days a week...

I'll totally go for a talk right now.

I'll write my number down just in case you need a lift...

I'm a casual drug user.

I'm close. Don't move.

I'm crushing on someone

I'm fine... here.

I'm giving you a gift. Oh wow..

I'm going through such a tough time.

I'm gonna go find a hot dog.

I'm gonna take off my shoes, is that okay? Whatever man. I'm gonna go hit the ladies room.

I'm just saying maybe... to consider doing something else... like anything else.

I'm kind of in the middle of something, Lynn. My treat.

I'm like the fuckin Terminator dude. I'm just gonna keep coming after you.

I'm not a nurse.

I'm not kidding. It's on my car.

I'm not... you know... that is just offensive that you would even ask me that.

I'm pretty sure I'd like that.

I'm rooming with a guy I met on craigslist all I'm asking you for is 10,000 dollars

I'm serious. Okay.

I'm sorry, but if you cant pay, then I can't schedule the appointment

I'm sorry... I can't get em'... just not ready but if you're patient...

I'm starting to think that maybe we need to take a break.

I'm writing a song right now called 855 8241777.

I've been speaking to various... ah... black... citizens... who

I've been thinking about it a lot, I'm like an 8, 8 and a half..but if I got a new pair of tits.. right?

I've never been more excited about anything.

I've never seen this woman before in my life.

I've realised that I don't need a blackboard or a classroom to set an example.

If anyone has any information regarding the missing Anne wig...

If I could go back in time and undo slavery? I would.

If I know Morgan, and I think I do. Ah!... Morgan will get there.

If I think about it, Will I get extra credit?

If opera goes away, we're fucked.

If the Teacher's Union found out that I was administering a drug test to a teacher with this little proof...

If you're around, maybe we could wash your car.

In here...

Incoming...

Is anyone have anything to add to what that girl just said?

Is everything okay with Gaby? She will be fine.

Is for you to get overwhelmed...

Is it me? I mean there's something wrong with me? I don't think so.

Is this English?

Is this new? I love it.

Isn't getting laid until he's 29 that's what I know...

It is my first cracket song writing so... be kind.

It is really fun over here. Lynn, get your ass over to those cowboys.

It just feels so good to help.

It might be nice to give her a little rest.

It seem like Miss Halsey was getting pretty chummy with the money.

It starts with you. I'm sure she appreciated that.

It was not a popular opinion.

It's a nice thing you did. I don't know what you're talking about?

It's a pretty inspiring message to the kids.

It's a quadrant system

It's good to know there's still some actual educators out there.

It's like... too cute almost.

It's not a compliment.

It's nothing personal, but...

It's on the syllabus. Well... You never assign it to us.

It's over, Elizabeth.

It's so nice to see you becoming a real member of the JAMS family.

It's the only argument I need, Shawn!!

It's today...

Its a time for a little bit of talking before we really get to the important part.

Its been a year, she's still the wallpaper on my phone

Just leave me alone.

Just leave them on the desk...

Just meant friends. Tell you what, friend... I've gotta get going, cover me

Just not in my arms or my chest.

Just put it. Alrighty.

Just saying.

Just so we're clear.

Just stop talking.

Just stop talking.

Just try it... try it! Just... please stop pressuring her.

Kansas City. Stalk much?

Kids.

Know I walked in on him trying to fuck his dog? Peanut butter everywhere

Last week when we went for a drive.

Last year's car wash raised 6000 dollars

Learning is fun tastic. What did you say to me?

Lemme dat daa... Usually here, the things that they call me.

Lemme finish my drink. Now Lynn!! Second.

Let have it.

Let me think.

Let's get baked.

Let's go, We had a lot to go over. Everybody sit down, come on..

Lew Diamond Phillips?

Like any other job... in the entire world.

Like its so easy to get pregnant from some dude nutting into a condom

Like over winter break.

Like telephone charades, or this string game...

Like you did in 2008.

Like you guys... You should go talk to someone, Lynn.

Like you, with your little boobs or me experimenting with ethnic food.

Listen Carl, I know that you are a very busy man So, I'm just gonna get right down to it

Listen, I could take you day by day through my entire syllabus, but that's not just how I do things.

Listen, I don't wanna tell you how to run your class but...

Listen, I'm sure you have full paid along with a rocking hot body.

Listen, the school hired me because... i'm amazing at what I do

Listen, word to the wise.

Look at me. I'm gonna get my breasts enlarged in a couple of months...

Look you don't have to decide right now.

Look..I know you kinda skated by last year doing the bare minimum thing

Looking at it! Elizabeth gave this to me.

Looks like algebra is calling. I hate math. Wish me luck.

Lover... are you there?!!

Lover... lover look, I don't wanna fight... Its only $ 10,000... it would mean the world to me.

Lynn, will you go grab me some milk? What kind of milk do you want?

Ma'am! Please don't touch the dog. Your dog is mistaken.

Make it out to cash.

Many of us are going out tonight to see Period 5 play, Do you wanna come?

Marjarie?

Marji... I am going to rock your vagina.

Mark, I'm pregnant.

May I? Absolutely, take em' for a spin

Maybe it might be fun to try some icebreakers...

Maybe next time we can dry hump without our clothes on.

Maybe stay the end half... play by Yer or just stay the end.

Maybe there's a false bottom.

Maybe this will help. What are you doing?

Mine's metal. Even better.

Miss Halsey, its me Garette from school. It's Garrett. Having a nice Christmas?

Miss Halsey? Would you like to come and spend Christmas with us?

Miss Halsey... I'm impressed. Thanks, I've been working out.

Miss Halsey... really? Wow!!

Mmmm... Look at it.

Morgan.

Mr. Halabi, thank you for your time. Most welcome.

Much people don't wear bras. Definitely. Much teachers.

My decision that I made myself to leave was super difficult.

My fave... My favorite job was, 'Splitting rails'.

My grandfather made it, so... Oh your grandfather designs watches?

My mom and I made some holiday cookies.

My students, probably most.

Naah.. got something going. Can I say something for the record?

Nail her!

Never. You clearly have a... rich interior life with the poems and the whatever but...

Next question.

Next time you accuse one of my teachers of stealing, you better have some evidence.

Nice... Good job, guys...

No problem. Is Amy gonna be okay?

No running in the hall!

No, eli... if I gave you that impression well... ah!... I'm so sorry

No, I said fucking troll. Oh, I thought you said Kirk.

No, I'm not going back. Come on.

No, it's medical marijuana.

No, my creepy roommate moved out. So now its just... just me... and the dogs.

No, no, no that's my class. Axle's barking at the wrong tree there.

No, no... no absolutely not, no I...

No, no... that is absolutely classified Unless, unless you have one of these bad boys, right here.

No, of course not I don't even know what that is... I...

No, we're actually learning. Hey do you know Animal Farm isn't even really about animals?

No, what I see is that you are getting worked up And what I would hate to see...

Nobody's read this book?

Nothing in the face.

Now, here we are...

Now, I don't want to speak out of school but... from where I was sitting, I think...

Now... Go! I like it here.

O.

Of course, hey watch my quadrant!

Of course. Of course.

OFFICIAL PRACTICE TEST MANUAL

Oh I'm drying' the shit out of you. Oh Dry Fuck the fuck outta me, Scott.

Oh it was great. I went to the zoo almost every weekend.

Oh my God, are you okay? I got fucked up my knee.

Oh my God! Sir?

Oh Okay Take your time.

Oh Philip, hate on Christmas? Oops... Sorry, Santa.

Oh Shit!! Check it out.

Oh, hey there..Scott Delacorte. And you are? Leaving.

Oh, hold on. Shelly... Ooo Shelly, someone's got a message.

Oh, I love my summers... fresh corn... mmmm

Oh, I need some water.

Oh, Thank God. And we discovered this new Ethiopian restaurant.

Oh, there we go.

Oh, time for bed.

Oh! Friend of Marjorie? Well get then... Fuck you man.

Oh! Look, your moms here. Hi Mom, what a fun surprise.

Oh! Ooh! Yeah Meant to ask...

Oh! Stop it, be my pleasure.

Oh! Sure, I can get you one easy No problem.

Oh! You got it last time. We'll split it. Oh! Okay yeah.

Oh!! Thank you.

Oh!... You didn't get your... Your titties...?

Oh... oh tell me bout that... I think I'm gonna have another drink before I hit the road.

Oh... ok... well feel better.

Ohh... The wine is good.

Ok well, I'm really terrible at this types of thing so, I'll make it quick.

Ok, Lebron is a better re bounder and passer.

Okay fine, I'll sign the prenup.

Okay fine, I'm not actually pregnant.

Okay, If the younger generation doesn't get into opera then guess what? No more opera!

Okay, okay think. Let me think.

Okay, well... You know I have to call the superintendor.

Okay.

Okay... lemme tell you something right away A: Orientals tests better...

Okay... Let's see how Mary Tod's doing with that butter.

Okay... Lynn, I'm gonna take this.

Okay... oh!! this was fun, huh?

Okay... so that's endorsed And put the rest on these.

Okay... That's enough. We get it, you're crying.

Okay... There's a handicapped one... which is way closer use the handicapped one, its way closer

Okay..just so you know... That shit does not face me at all

On the first 100 pages.

One extra credit on your diagram, want or not? I do I want it.

One glance, one dance because together we can achieve...balance.

ONE MONTH LATER

One of nature's cruel joke I guess...

One teacher can make a difference.

Oooo... well... Glad I wore my fun underwear.

Or the wild success of

Or your money back.

Pathetic. This is why the Japs are overtaking us.

Period 5? Yeah the teacher band.

Please don't touch my mirror.

Please hold..

Please know that we will always consider you part of the JAMS family.

Please sir? What the ff?? What the fuck, who does that? I'm a friend of Marjorie's.

Please, help yourself to some delicious snacks and drinks in the back.

Please... let me know ASAP.

Plus jail time.

Plus they're really expensive, you know..per tit. Yea, and you got to get two of them.

Probably not. I think in college.

Racist, faggotron, faggy Hitler, dick breath... Okay...?

Really close.. Ready? Mmmm... Yea.

Really love with what you've done with the place.

Really that's... Congratulations I didn't... I didn't realise that so...

Really? Cause I couldn't help but notice that you're not wearing a bra.

Really? Yea.

Really? You sure you wanna do this? Yea, gym teacher.

Recess is over.

Regular mouth.

Remember, a great man always has the courage to say what is in his heart.

Remember, in the second grade when we had a sleep over and you wet the bed?

Retest!! Retest! Retest!

Russell Gettis, gym teacher We did busted together last spring.

Salary plus tips.

Sandy... c'mon... now now guys its is not a time to make silly jokes...

Sandy's so funny.

Say no more.

Scored in the top 5% of the whole state.

Scott Delacorte. Elizabeth Halsey.

Scott, I want you to know You can talk to me about anything.

Scott, your phone accidentally called me last night

See those championship banners?

See you around Gym teacher.

See, I am not a wiz' at this computer here.

See, that's what I'm talking about. Keep saying shit like that you're gonna get punched.

Seriously?

Seriously?

Seriously?

Seventh grade is not your moment. Yeah, eighth grade will be better.

Sex in an office.

Shall we toast?

Sharing those bodies with each other.

Sharks. Well sharks can tear families apart.

She drugged me and she stole from me... then she's going down.

She has such a big heart. Looks like enormous.

She in some kind of trouble? Marjarie? I think you're the one who might be in some kind of trouble.

She is a thoughtful young woman and she is teaching for all the right reasons.

She is such a phony. Yeah, major phony.

She just laughed at me and called me 'gross'.

She likes him because he's hot and popular dude. You...

She wants a guy like Ian.. What's his face? Ian Mentelbaum? The rapper?

She's been amazing helping me do with my breakup.

She's got a lot to loose going public with this.

She's never gonna like me, is she?

She's superficial and her priorities are all fucked up.

Shocker! We're having our car wash this weekend.

Shorter hours, summers off, no account credibility...

Should be fun. Should be amazing. Lynn you wanna come?

Shut up! So did you and your wife just moved to town? I'm not married

Sit your ass down!

Slavery's the worst.

So "if I play it" as the **** say.

So awful.

So I go now? Yes, you go now.

So instead of accusing her, you might wanna ask her for some pointers.

So there it is My heart honestly.

So whatever she did, worked. Lee Mathews dad called, he said the car wash was a raging success.

So you guys having an awesome time?

So you think we should hire a tutor?

So, all this is mine, by the way As far as the eye can see.

So, are you excited about your surgery?

So, are you guys coming to the palace tonight? My band's gonna do few songs...

So, basically, if I was gonna go out with you, I would be making the conscious choice...

So, call me crazy, but this might be the best Period 5 show of all time.

So, the poem's about that girl? Yea, Chase.

So, what are the limitations of having Scott as the narrator?

So, you're just gonna let her walk free?

So.. Russell, what has to go wrong in someone's life for them to end up being a middle school gym teacher?

So... Holla, fellow educators...

Someone's calling my name.

Something like that.

Something's got a case of a sleepyss.

Son of a bitch... 5700. Yea... Goddamn it! Lynn.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news Wall...

Sorry, Jesus.

Sorry.

Sorry. Sit down.

Sorry... sorry I thought you were telling everyone.

Speech, speech. Well...

Squirrel? Yeah, you know.

Steven said that you spend $16,000 last month.

Still, I know that our students are in good hands.

Stop dressing like you're running for congress

Stupid point, misspelled.

Such a dingaling.

Suitcases, honey are we going on a trip?

Super fast.

Supplies?? You're Chase's parents?

Surprise me. Okay, I'll get you skim, no 2%...

Sympathy co Exotico.

Sympathy co how do you know and you know and again you just know.

Sympathy co She helped me heal, she helped me grow.

Sympathy co.

Take it. And open up... open up.

Tell me my mission again.

Test tampering? At JAMS?

Thank u Beth, but as summer droves upon us, its time not only to say goodbye to another school year

Thank you Amy, for pointing that out. You're so welcome.

Thank you for meeting me on such short notice. Of course. Sure..

Thank you Sandy, for that.

Thank you, Elizabeth, for listening.

Thank you, sir. I don't want to see anybody get hurt.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. Is that Jaeger LeCoultre?

Thanks dude.

Thanks for calling again

Thanks, I love men's watches, its kind of a hobby

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks. Yea you know, some teachers just sail by doing that bare minimum thing...

That explains me, making absolutely no sense.

That if they study, sacrifice...

That shit worked!

That sounds nice.

That they're rewarded with suspicion?

That was great. More like amazing.

That was the big one Honest Abe.

That we remembered Have we ever forget.. What is that?? haaha.

That's a... Goddamn it! Sandy...

That's it!

That's just something I say sometimes. Stupid.

That's my thing, and everybody knows it. so..

That's really dangerous, Russell

That's what I would do if I were you, Wally.

That's your window be ready.

The big fake titties Are you really gonna do that?

The blasting disregard for the school syllabus.

The book drive for womens prison which Mrs. Pathacheks class sponsored.

The family business, yea my mothers maiden name is lecoultre

The HNIC.

The photographer who was like... so nice he made me feel like really really comfortable

The skim, whole, 2%, chocolate?

The Springfield trip is the best part of 7th grade...

The total is $9300 for the surgery, plus one night stay at our facility.

Then No

Then who knows one day you wake up you decide you want to be a missus.

There are even teachers in this very school who use drugs.

There is no one in the LeBron who'll ever be Jordan. Nobody will ever be Jordan... okay?

There she is, Elizabeth Halsey. Wooooo...

There was a girl I met sometime ago.

There's a reason... he didn't pack it.

These cookies suck

They always called me that because I said what was on my mind.

They do, they do use drugs. They do They do They do

They finally got their own cuisine Progress...

They forgot to re stuffed my minibar. How's yours lookin'?

They were over there, I have moved over there.

They would make my life a living hell, Amy...

They're ready for you.

Things are about to change around here.

Think about it.

This girl is never gonna be interested in you.

This is a real shit sandwich!

This is called the The Chase by Garrett Tiara.

This is indeed a winter wonderland.

This is just what we know, right?

This is literally the biggest party... Aren't you going out with the other nurses?

This is original wood.

This is ridiculous, this is the one place in this building where I'm allowed to be alone with my thoughts

This is so funny, cause I love raisins and he hates raisins.

This is the desk.

This is very very bad, Elizabeth. Incredibly very bad, Elizabeth

This might help. Wanna get wasted? Uh... Yea...

This time I have a witness and like I said Wally, she stole the Anne wig.

This will just take a sec...

Those oatmeal rasin again? Gingerbread.

THREE MONTHS LATER.

To Elizabeth Halsey.

To new friends And new lovers

Totally. Hey, your body feels so good.

Trust me on this.

Trust me She's only using you for your money.

Twilight, look at me.

Uh sorry..I just wanted to know if you wanted to grab some lunch

Uh Uhh!! Yes I do!

Uhh yeah. Oh! You know what I wanna talk to you too, did I hear that right, that you were showing movies all last week?

Uhh, you know Amy has been running after like... two years. Yea, but she does so much already.

Umm... I happen to be pedaling past the 7th Grade car wash this Saturday.

Umm... it's relatively new and Grace who is ah... Work with me on Mondays and Wednesdays and Thursday and...

Umm... The day after the schools administers them, I will shoot one right over to you.

Umm... why don't you two give me a hand with dessert? And we can let these two... discuss.

Voila.

Wait for it.

Wally, do you remember how I told you, there are teachers here who use and abuse drugs?

Wally, it's Amy Squirrel. Amy? What are you do...? Get out of here!

Wally!!! Can't you see? She is manipulating you through the use of dolphins?

Wally... we barely know anything about her. Hey, you know what they raised almost $7000.

Wally's got that big orientation in the auditorium.

Wanna get high? Yeaaah.

Watch the bowl.

We accept all major credit cards. Yeah well... my credit situation is little... complicated

We are gonna change the new cycle.

We are in a state of emergency, and my word is law There is only one boss in this place, and that's me.

We can never in the world be too much...

We done running?

We had no idea where we were going, We left the maps at home...

We haven't had homework all year

We should go out and celebrate. Your treat?

We should like... go have a drink... sometime... together.

We're all done. Super, thanks a bunchames

We're dating... so... It'll also be romantic.

We're dealing with a criminal mastermind.

We're gonna have to cross check her entire class's scores.

We're here to learn.

We're talking like three figures.. Almost 700 bucks.

We're the chaperones we're going together.

We're watching a movie on the first day? I think its awesome.

We've got desk.. He's not gonna find anything in here.

Welcome to Air 7th Grade Social Studies I'll be your captain, Miss Squirrel.

Welcome to the number one New Year's Eve Party in the entire world.

Well ah.. granted it wasn't the original plan As a young boy I wanted to be a professor...

Well done. Thank you.

Well I feel stupid. No, Scott... Scott.

Well I have cat like reflexes accept for it.

Well I'm pro choice, I believe everyone should choose whatever makes them happiest..

Well if it isn't Professor Smarty pants? Don't mess with me, I'm a lot stronger than I look.

Well if those pointers include wearing provocative beach wear...

Well if you must know, I was helping a student through a tough time

Well it was okay... it was medicinal.

Well its been another great year here at JAMS.

Well now... I am.

Well that is definitely Marjarie, only with kind of weird hair here In real life she's actually very pretty.

Well there was... Never mind. What?

Well this one student is in line to be editor of The Daily Musket next year.

Well, alright... you... and you grab the TV and roll it up front

Well, I never have and I never will.

Well, I think the students teach me at least as much as I teach them.

Well, I'm gonna get going I don't want the kids to see me leaving your room Yea.

Well, that's definitely impressive. Like you can do better?

Well, that's what it's all about.

Well... you say 'YES'.

What a great story. What did you wanna talk about?

What a turn out. Oh yeah, the kids are just having a blast.

What am I supposed to do? Huh? Where am I supposed to go?

What are you doing here, anyway?

What article? Her article for the Tribune. She's a reporter there, right?

What bonus? For the state test.

What brings you here? Mr. Apple.

What do we talk about in class?

What do you know? You don't even know our names

What do you want? Is that marijuana?

What else, Sasha? I think I've told you everything.

What happened to us?

What part of it, exactly?

What the hell was that? So, there you go. I guess that explains everything.

What turns you on Carl?

What was that, Mr. Apple?

What wend so wrong in your life that you ended up educating children?

What!! No way... It was fine. I have a GPS navy system.

What?

What? Did you see the col saw of education?

What? I am the student leader for the trip to Springfield.

What? You don't have to do that. It's nothing, its my favorite book.

What's going on with you? Need a tissue? Huh?

What's up? Okay... whoo

What's wrong with your face? What is wrong with your face?

What's your favourite part? Love.

Whatever... Hey you got a lighter?

When my dad was overweight and had to go to the hospital because of his heart.

When you got your meeting with the principal and the superintendent tomorrow... at the meeting...

Where do you even live? In some weird apartment with some creepy roommate?

Where is it Axle? Where's it boy?

Where is the TV? Now everybody open your "To kill a mockingbird" to page 1.

Whether this is always been about the money. You never loved me.

Which ever teacher has the highest scoring class gets a bonus. Amy wins every year.

Which is why they call me 'rail splitter'.

White wine in the office? Bad Boy...

Who are you again? Amy Squirrel.

Who can forget Mr. Pinkus's haunted classroom.

Who can tell me why Jem cries when the hole in the tree is filled with cement?

Who could I speak to regarding the allegations of racial bias on your standardized tests?

Who did this?

Who knows what else she's capable of?

Who knows... maybe you'll win the bonus.

Who show that with hard work and dedication...

Who would like to see Mary Tod churn butter? Churn butter?

Who's a lawyer."

Why would you do that? Your tits are fine.

Will you let me finish? Can?... Can you let me finish?

With his brother, Ajack.

With summer round the corner, it's time to say goodbye not only to another school year...

With the cowboy hats? Yea.

With the highest scores in cook county That's the whole county

Won't have had to say to whom ever it was "No way"... "Absolutely not" and...

Woooh!! Wait!!

Wow wooo woo wow Amy... Calm down, Amy. Fucking damn it! What the fuck!?

Wow, thank you guys for coming out What a turnout, right? Umm...

Wow! You know Carl... Enough business for one night, don't you think?

Wow!! Sounds great.

Wow... almost $40, thank you.

Wow... No, I meant Do you wanna get high with me?

XOXO, my love for you is XOXO.

Ya if you notice the nets, that's a brand new nets I had installed.

Ya, not bad... for a camera phone Huh?? You can keep those too Fuck!

Yea, Amy's gonna be fine. Well, let her know she's in my prayers.

Yea, and he was wearing this. What?

Yea, from the world's weirdest text book.

Yea, I forgot that was there. Such a dick sometimes.

Yea, I'm gonna give him detention when we get back. That's probably a good idea.

Yea, I'm not gonna hear that. Oh... it's mandatory.

Yea, one kid ...hit the other kid with some col saw...

Yea, she's sitting right next to me. No.

Yea, unfortunately Elizabeth, Scott and I have to go over the itinerary for the Springfield trip.

Yea?

Yea. So, I heard about the whole engagement thing... that blows.

Yea... I thought about it, you know Cause I don't even need them.

Yea..that's true, we're not getting any younger yea..we should finish up.

Yeaa...ugh!! you're gonna find someone great Right?

Yeah, cool...

Yeah, I know you're forgetting something.

Yeah, I really love helping bums.

Yeah, its been quite a change. Well I think it's great.

Yeah! Did you hear your speech? Come on lets go back. No.

Yeah. Look at it.

Yes I understand. I just don't want to see an innocent teacher get hurt.

Yes, Elizabeth... is Elizabeth Halsey here? There she is...

Yes, Oh my God! I love to dance, I could dance all night.

Yes... yes.

Ying and Yang.

You and I are gonna go out and we are gonna find awesome people for each other.

You are in Period 5?

You are too trusting. I am. I didn't know what was happening

You can bet your bottom dollar the sun will not come out tomorrow.

You can tell me anything Scott, you're one of my best friends

You can't do that I have band and jazz band tonight.

You can't.

You go... you start with one of em' and you start talking to the other one...and then you go back to the first one

You got this?

You guys are so cute. So cute?

You have no idea how difficult it is to compete against these Barbie doll types

You have no upper body strength. Yes, I do...

You have some rough road ahead of you.

You know a student like Chase would benefit so much from some extra attention?

You know I spent my entire summer hanging out at bars near where the Bulls practice.

You know I'd be happy to do it myself, but its just so hard with a class of 20..

You know sometimes I get self conscious about it but...

You know what I think would help... Carl...?

You know what, I'm starting to wonder...

You know, I'm super tired I'm just getin' in the sack

You know, I've always said that dolphins are the humans of the sea

You know, Lynn when I first started teaching

You know, we should probably be getting back. Just fuckin do it... weed is awesome.

You know, when President Lincoln abolish slavery...

You know? The two of us... It's never gonna happen.

You know... how much we all love her.

You know... I don't know... Something like... maybe... Supervising the 7th grade car wash.

You monster!!

You must be Carl?

You need an ambulance? Ambulance is not necessary.

You need something?

You never tell me anything. Yea...

You owe me for breaking off the engagement you know how humiliating that was?

You realise it... if we found out you're lying, You're gonna lose your job.

You really wanna be a President or is that something your parents want?

You rock!

You still a gym teacher? I am, yea

You truly love my son? I love him so much it hurts.

You understand this is what I do? Yea I got it Like for a living.

You want me to take a bite?

You wrote me another card.

You, Chapz.

You!!..don't wanna do that, you're already so pretty.

You. Ve... come to... the right place.

You're looking at the new rhythm guitarist and backup vocalist.

You're my narcotic, Ohhh...

You're not working hard enough. I need results.

You're out of your mind.

You're so symphaty co.

You're very welcome, speech??

Your jeans feels so good against my jeans.

Your shirt's misbuttoned Her shirt is misbuttoned.

Your weight should be evenly distributed You have to throw off the back foot.

3 MONTHS LATER

25 or 30, whatever. To be a teacher?

Are you sure? I'm watching you.

Bullshit. No you're not.

Clearly? How would that even work?

Elizabeth? Here.

Hmmm. I just hate slavery so so much.

Kill it! Can we talk about this later? Later we'll all die said the gator to the fly.

Those stupid... so... I'm just fucking with you.

You're worth the wait. I think so too

Mom!! Tell her what the accountant said. Mom!

...after the surgery.

...alleged that your test are biased towards white people and orientals.

...and observe it Amy, you said you wouldn't speak.

...for money, I think I'll pass.

...If I go back out there everyone's gonna laugh at me.

...It's like the freedom and the wind in your hair obviously the image... you don't wanna...

...of physical education.

...to be dating a Gym Teacher who lives in a shack with four dogs?

...to those under privilege students at Malcolm X high school.

...you kidding me? Edward James Olmos?

"Atticus Finch is a good lawyer because he is a good person...

"Honest Abe". Yes, obviously. Honest Abe.

"Learning is Fun tastic"

"Ms. Squirrel says reading is fun"

"Stupider"

(Movie Corner)