Last Christmas Edit

A shitting bird just shat in my eye.

A whole different Tom.

A... a song? (chuckles)

Able to leap sofas in a single bound...

About depending on anyone?

About two sisters who used to get on really well,

Absolutely.

Accommodation issues.

Accommodation, firstly, 'cause I've sort of run out of options

Actually, I don't.

Actually, Tom who?

Actually, who are you?

After all the trauma and... Look, I'm just worried...

Ah.

Ah.

Ah.

Ah.

Alba is... Alba is Marta's flatmate.

Alba?

All it means is that

All of ya!

All of your stresses will just melt away.

All right, every time she contacts you

All right, Mr. Muscle, you can get to refreshing that tree.

All right, saying sorry doesn't change everything.

All right, we've got lots to get through.

All right? Just... just go back to work.

All set for your date?

All the joys and the love of Christmas

ALL: ♪ Last Christmas, I gave you my heart ♪

ALL: ♪ To novo leto faljeno ♪

Also to avoid my mother,

Also, nobody's clapping. (continues indistinctly)

Am I invited?

Amy Winehouse and all the rest at the age of 27.

And a Fox's Glacier Mint.

And a Strepsil.

And at the health food shop, I was Miso.

And contact me, all right? 'Cause...

And gets no response, she contacts me.

And had a transplant, but...

And have you had sex with, uh, Tom yet?

And he basically said

And I could sing before.

And I do appreciate you stopping by.

And I felt so lucky to have you.

And I got chucked out of my digs this morning,

And I I just... I just... I've got lots of issues, all right?

And I just rescued an orphan from a burning car.

And I... and I don't know what they put back,

And I'm expected to swallow it just because she's been ill.

And I'm finally getting better

And it makes me feel really bad about myself.

And lashings of hot water if you fancy a shower.

And like I'd lost my most special part.

And mad Marta?

And my legendary patience will crumble.

And not feeling bad about myself.

And only two biscuits each, mind.

And people believe.

And preggers, so we ain't drinking, either, party girl.

And she was happy about that?

And she's just never been the same since.

And she's just never been the same since.

And that baby has a full set of teeth.

And that isn't even the nastiest thing we sell.

And that's okay.

And that's one of its selling points.

And the production is... on ice!

And then don't

And then give it to someone who is going to break it.

And then I was special when I nearly died

And they kept telling me I was lucky to be alive.

And they live here in London?

And underappreciated in our time.

And watch this one,

And what you know?

And where's this man of yours?

And you have job you dream of.

And you having bumped into me by chance, here we are.

And you not ringing her is seriously affecting my life.

And you not ringing her is seriously affecting my life.

And you, Mrs. Andrich... you need to worry less.

And you, uh, came into town for it?

And you'll realize you sound like Jason Statham.

And you're fantasizing, elf,

And your mother says the opposite. Who do I believe?

And your suite, madame.

And, uh, who... who's this?

And, you know, if men had to do this shit,

ANDY (muffled): Madam. Hello.

Anyone up for a, you know, pizza?

Anyway, boring, boring, boring, la, la, la, la.

Anyway, I'm homeless again.

Anyway, when I got better, it all went away,

Are the doctors keeping in touch?

Are you all right?

Are you all right?

Are you M Mrs. Challis?

Are you really gonna call him Boy?

Are you seriously doing a James Bond impression?

Are you there?

Are you writing that down?

Arse, head and hole!

ARTHUR and ARMY TOM: ♪ Donald, where's your troosers? ♪

Arthur, you you do know that you don't have to audition.

ARTHUR: Just the two, then?

As okay as I'll ever be on the bus.

Because all you seem to think about these days is sex.

Because because she...

Because he thinks I depend on him too much,

Because he'd rather be dead. (chuckles)

Because I wasn't looking where I was going

Because I'm a part of you.

Because I've just been really stupid.

Because I've really messed up for a number of reasons.

Because one of them has a problem with ice.

Because she appears never to work.

Because you're ashamed of who you are.

Because you're weird, this is weird, and I don't know you.

Because, um, there's also someone here, a gentleman,

Before you throw me in the bin with the rest

Being special thing is overrated.

Blimey.

Boom. Thank you.

BOTH: ♪ Be good to yourself ♪

BOTH: ♪ Do something for me ♪

Bottle of Rioja?

BOY: ♪ I'm dreaming ♪

Break in, I'm afraid.

Bugger.

But all that's gonna change,

But Dan said no speeches were allowed.

But I am because...

But I didn't feel alive.

But I don't feel lucky anymore.

But I don't think you'll get weird.

But I guess maybe we're all a bit damaged in this family.

But I was unconscious.

But it felt weird and different and strange and...

But one more thing, and you're out.

But right now I'm considering a little stroll with you.

But there is plenty of storage space.

But would you like a biscuit?

But you, Kate, you've got to take care of your heart.

Can he not practice here?

Can I get one of them?

Can I help you?

Can I help?

Can you please give me something for sleeping?

Can...

CASTING DIRECTOR: "Maybe plus."

CASTING DIRECTOR: Thank you. We'll be in touch.

Cat is animal.

Cat, dog.

Cheers.

CHILDREN'S CHOIR: ♪ Last Christmas... ♪

Christ, if I'm going home, I'm gonna need a drink.

Christ, why don't you just get

Christ.

Christ.

Christmas.

CHURCHILL: Just gonna write this out for you.

Come here.

Come on in.

Come on, then! Tea's up!

Could you just tell her that I'm very sorry?

Cover me.

CROWD: ♪ Merry Christmas! ♪

CROWLEY: Oh, they've had a right go in here, haven't they?

CROWLEY: Well, that's a good thing,

Dan, I can't take your attitude.

Dan, she doesn't have to help, you know.

Dan, what do you reckon?

Deciding on one Photoshopped image

Dick is penis. Penis is dick. That's the same word.

Did I miss something?

Did you follow me here?

Did you just giggle like a girl?

Did you shag him?

DIRECTOR: I would put him in "maybe plus."

DIRECTOR: Thank goodness for a heavy woolen tight.

DIRECTOR: Well, you know what? Let her go.

Dissimilar?

Ditch that.

Ditto.

Do you know we had a woman turn up in a crop top?

Do you know we have people turn up here,

Do you remember her flip flops?

Do you want to hear about my sister?

Does a lot of damage.

Does anything official arrive that tells you?

Don't bring that up. She burned her eyebrows off.

Don't deny it.

Don't even know where that's been.

Don't I know it, Dora.

Don't pick up anyone dodgy.

Don't tell me even your mother kicked you out.

Don't worry, elf.

DORA: Come in here!

Down a dark alley again with a complete stranger.

DR. ADDIS: So, uh, tell me about the diet.

Drama. God, she loved it.

Eat. You look like skeleton.

Ed just seemed to get that.

Eh.

Elf and safety?

Embarrassment... and that's just my mum.

Enjoy time with your friends.

Even possibly a few nights.

Everyone keeps everyone's secrets around here.

Excellent.

Except he's a minicab driver,

Excuse my language. It's typical, that is.

Fair point.

For crying out loud, how's that?

For my famous breakfast power juice.

For sleep, anxiety, panic attacks, the lot.

Former Yugoslavia. We had to escape.

Freehold this one, not for rental. Yeah.

From my grandmother,

From Snapchat to Instagram.

Fun, free, illegal, romantic.

GEORGE MICHAEL: ♪ I gotta have faith ♪

GEORGE MICHAEL: ♪ Time to pick my heart up off the floor... ♪

GEORGE MICHAEL: ♪ Well, I guess it would be nice ♪

Get some rest, Katarina. You look done in.

Get to work, elf.

Get to work.

Getting pooed on by a bird.

Give me one good reason.

Give us a song, Kate!

Go nicely with your tea.

Go on, then.

Go to sleep.

God, I've missed you.

God, who are you?!

Going home always makes me crazy.

Good eve... (gasps)

Good evening.

Good Lord.

Good luck.

Good luck.

Good.

Goodbye, Mum.

Gosh, you're so tiresome, Katarina.

Got access to some really freaky outlets.

Got you. I knew you liked him.

Great.

Great.

Guess what it was in the bakery on the Edgware Road.

Guess who got back from the conference a day early.

Ha! Funny, no. I installed everything on her phone

Hang on.

Happy? A good morning.

Happy. Happy.

Has anyone ever told you there's something

Have you come back for the gibbon?

Have you got a bourbon, Danny boy?

Have you had a couple drinks?

Have you had sex yet?

Have yourself a merry Christmas, yeah?

He hasn't got a phone.

He looks like he's having a lot of fun.

He seems to be disappearing a lot.

He was her uncle who died. You remember?

He was... he was very good.

He'll turn up.

He's also a vegan, so very conflicted.

He's an expert on sauerkraut.

He's disappeared again.

He's gonna think he's wandered

He's gorgeous, but this one...

Hear, hear.

Hell. Mum sung me to sleep.

Hello, Boy.

Hello, hello, hello.

Hello.

Her eyebrows will grow back. You know what won't grow back?

Her usual, curt, Asian self.

Here we are.

Here we are.

Here. Uh, I think it just pooed in your eye.

Here's something to start your day.

Hey, Ruf.

Hey, there's a latte for you on the shelf.

Hey, you're early.

Hey.

Hey.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi. Excuse me. I'm just looking for someone.

Hi. Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry about everything.

Hi. Yeah, I need a cab.

Hmm, all right.

Hmm? Talk to other people.

Hmm? What's wrong with...

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm. So the usual. What did you do this time?

Home.

How about you leave it and you go home alarmingly sober?

How did I even get here?

How do you know?

How was it?

How you gonna get home?

How's Boy?

How've you been?

Huh.

Huh. So, you can skate as well as sing?

Huh. What have we got here?

I also love it.

I am a girl.

I am an adult.

I am being nice to Alba, your girlfriend.

I am. How do you spell "ordinary"?

I bet she's really happy about that.

I blame the Poles.

I called myself Kitty.

I came in to check on your eye.

I can disappoint her in more ways than ever.

I can't believe I'm even giving you another chance,

I can't do anything.

I can't do this anymore.

I can't pronounce it.

I can't. I'll crease something or just spontaneously wee.

I choose not to go back to my parents' house.

I could drop quite easily. I just...

I could... make some tea.

I didn't ask to be, but...

I do like a challenge, though.

I don't depend on you.

I don't even... I mean, seriously,

I don't have a phone.

I don't have enough tinsel to cover your corpse.

I don't know anything about him.

I don't know.

I don't sleep.

I don't tell people, 'cause they get weird,

I got to go.

I had a heart transplant.

I had to smash my own window

I have had my fill

I have nicknamed her "Lazy the Elf"

I haven't heard from him in days.

I haven't heard you make one of those in a very long time.

I heard him have a very loud phone conversation

I heard him have a very loud phone conversation

I honestly think she preferred it when I was ill.

I I just want to say this one thing.

I just can't seem to... at the moment.

I just don't want you to drop dead in front of the customers.

I just felt half dead.

I just really need a bed for the night.

I just told you everything there is to know about me.

I just want to say a massive thank you

I just... I needed a bed for the night, and he...

I knew.

I know how it start.

I know I not so important to do that.

I know it seems like she's...

I know you know all this, and I know you're fed up

I know. Oh! My phone. Sorry. Sorry.

I like hidden places.

I like this man.

I like to wait until she's asleep.

I like, yeah.

I look for you everywhere, and you're never there.

I look for you.

I mean, I got a lot of attention,

I mean, it's a bit of a stretch, but...

I mean, shouldn't you be eating quinoa or kale or something?

I mean, who buys this stuff?

I mean, you should try it.

I mean, you've been having a tough time

I mean, your mother... when was the last time

I meant I haven't got a place to stay that I've chosen.

I might just give it a break.

I need a word.

I need some gingerroot, fresh beets

I need time to myself.

I need to get back, so come get out here.

I not sleeping.

I promise.

I really don't.

I really enjoyed our walk today.

I said, "Don't talk to me."

I sound like a cat with a fur ball.

I think just to be a human being is hard.

I think she'd be good for the horse. Don't you think?

I think she's dead, she's had lapse,

I think so, too.

I think so.

I think the whole special...

I think you should just sleep for a bit.

I thought you had a job.

I thought you might have decided to move on.

I understand. Uh...

I want to talk to her.

I was just incredibly bad at what I do

I was on the list. No, my name's Kate Andrich.

I was supposed to be special.

I will go out and get shit faced later.

I will nail you to my dick.

I wish Mum and Dad knew you were happy.

I won't be too late. I promise.

I won't.

I work with the severely distressed.

I would, uh... I'd call that a successful date.

I... Who knows? She might be the next Streisand.

I'd like to think that I played a part in your rise to stardom.

I'll come back for it.

I'll come find you at the shop.

I'll figure it out, you know.

I'll have to find out one day.

I'm a mess.

I'm a part time cycle courier

I'm a terrible singer, really.

I'm asking you to do a single thing, Katarina.

I'm at work. You could've called me.

I'm busy. You're weird. Goodbye.

I'm going in there.

I'm gonna dash down the street.

I'm gonna... sit on the floor.

I'm good. (mutters)

I'm having a self pity party.

I'm I'm trying my best here.

I'm just gonna leave that...

I'm just not in the mood for a walk.

I'm Kate.

I'm loving the work. Wrong vibe, though, yeah?

I'm making an effort.

I'm not a career elf.

I'm not bored.

I'm not fed up with feminism.

I'm not gonna heal my heart

I'm not ill anymore, all right?

I'm not made of bloody biscuits.

I'm not sure how I feel about

I'm not sure it's that good for me.

I'm over the galleon, but one more thing,

I'm sorry to leave this message.

I'm sorry, Mr. Baldrick...

I'm sorry, Santa.

I'm sure it is. Uh, what about sleep?

I'm the... plumber.

I'm Tom.

I'm Tom.

I'm trying to cut a passion fruit with a fish knife.

I'm very good at tidying up.

I'm... and I'm I'm sorry...

I've been really, really stupid.

I've never eaten so much fermented cabbage.

I've never seen that before.

I've walked down this street so many times.

Idiot. Follow me.

If anyone can do it, you can.

If I could buy you a drink.

If I sing a lullaby...

If that thought's comfortable

If Tom Webster does come in, could you just tell him

In front of people who could've given me a job.

In here.

In little ways and in big ways.

Inconceivable.

Indeed.

Instead of working.

Interesting... and weird.

Into the llama enclosure. Close.

Is all part of my grand plan

Is he a magician?

Is that a crocodile with pompoms?

Is that really a good nutritional choice?

Is that where you get your singing from?

Is there anything that I could improve upon

Is this okay?

Is try to interfere and control my life.

Is, in fact, what makes us happy.

It doesn't matter.

It is a fermented mini cabbage hedge.

It is amusing.

It just means that you're built of everything you do.

It means, "I will nail you to my dick."

It was always going to be yours one way or another.

It was last Christmas, by all accounts.

It was my grandmother's.

It'll be cool.

It'll be fine. Something will turn up.

It's "Kate."

It's "Kate."

It's "Kate." It's "Kate."

It's a bit annoying, if I'm honest.

It's a pain in the fundament.

It's a stupid word.

It's all that probate stuff that stops us

It's almost like we're having a relationship.

It's beautiful.

It's brilliant. It's lovely, isn't it?

It's coming along nicely.

It's fine.

It's incredible how unfunny it is.

It's it's been empty for months.

It's just a nine month long trauma

It's Kate. Uh, wh where can I plug in my music?

It's like an unspoken rule.

It's like you don't care about anything.

It's Mr. Claus, I believe.

It's night. Cool. Okay.

It's none of their business.

It's not funny, Klaus.

It's pretty sad.

It's quite unusual to see a bird like that in town.

It's your fault.

IVAN (laughing): Oh, come on, Petra.

IVAN: Through the tunnel.

JENNA: It is a total conspiracy, is what it is.

JENNA: Reentry and all that. How's Santa?

JENNA: You called, uh, just before we got the crib up,

Jump in there.

Just can't help it, can you?

Just have a chat, and then go back to work.

Just in case you thought I was too perfect.

Just leave her alone.

Just my luck, I face plant into a pile of rubbish

Just ring your mother.

Just taking a little look, huh?

Just the doctors, the nurses, the hospital staff.

Just to give myself a bit of space.

Just uncertain.

Just...

Katarina, or Kate, or whatever your name is now,

Katarina.

Kate, that was lovely. Thank you.

Kate, there's something I've got to tell you.

KATE: ♪ I wrapped it up and sent it ♪

KATE: ♪ You tell me you're cold on the inside ♪

KATE: Ah, yeah. Mm.

KATE: Do you know, actually, it's...

KATE: Do you think she was giving them tips?

KATE: Hi, Mum.

KATE: I had no idea this existed.

KATE: I'm coming. I'm com...

KATE: I'm gonna show you to

KATE: Idiot.

KATE: Mm hmm.

KATE: Mm.

KATE: Mm.

KATE: Mm...

KATE: No. Thank you, but no.

KATE: Oh, piss off.

KATE: Okay.

KATE: This is cool.

KATE: Uh, wow.

KATE: Well, he probably thought no one could hear him.

KATE: Yeah, and that's how it's always gonna be.

KATE: Yeah?

KATE: Yes. Thank you, Daniel.

Kate.

KGB! Open up!

KGB. (clicks tongue)

Kind of.

Know what "nabijem te na kurac" means?

Leave me alone.

Let me get my phone out. I'll record you,

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's go. I've got a surprise for you.

Let's just... Yeah, you're weird.

Let's pretend Mary had twins, and you can get both.

Like a bloody normal person.

Like a late blossoming or something.

Like a squid but with bones and less legs.

Like an envelope and something that's like, "Dear so and so,

Like her father who is never here.

Like I exist.

Like I say. Follow me.

Like, you're hungry, you're not hungry.

Listen, I've seen more of these little middle class do gooders

Listen, you said it yourself.

Literally in the cupboard. No wonder it died.

Little helpers.

Look deep into my eyes.

Look up.

Look up.

Look up.

Look what it done to him. He look thousand years old.

Look, did you find me on Swiper?

Look, look.

Look, to be honest, you're not really my type.

Look, you took my bag!

Look.

Lots of glottal stops.

Lovely, it is.

Make you want to string yourself up.

Makes or unmakes character."

MALE RADIO ANNOUNCER: Wakey, wakey, London.

Mamice.

Mamice.

MAN: ...at the same time.

MAN: Can my nuts fit inside there?

MAN: Oi, Danny! Give us a hand?

MAN: There's bigger nuts?

MAN: What?

MAN: Which kind of music is this?

MARTA (sighing): Oh, God.

Marta is so...

Marta.

Maybe he was squatting.

Maybe I'm wrong.

Maybe this is more you than anything.

Maybe you should do something nice for Santa.

Me not being able to find you is what's up.

Merry Christmas to you. Thank you.

Merry Christmas.

Missing and kissing.

Missing you.

Mm, pity. It's a lovely place.

Mm, pity. It's a lovely place.

Mm, you're kidding.

Mm.

Mm.

Mm.

Mm.

Mm. (grunts)

Mm. Celiac.

Mm. Must have been hard.

Mm. Thanks, Dad.

Mm. Well, at least your name's easier to pronounce.

More center stage.

More important is: how do I look?

More like a bit of support.

Morning, gorgeous.

Morning. Hello.

Mother to be image you see in the ads?

Mothers are hell.

Mrs. Andrich, you've been given everything there is

Mum is a piece of work.

Mum needs you to ring her.

Mum, for making the most ginormous krempita.

Mum, would you let me in?

Mum! Can I please just go to sleep?

Mum?

Mum? Would... Mum!

Murder?

Murder?

Mwah.

My life is hell, Katarina.

My matchstick galleon.

My mate Hendo, he calls it "Fat Man's Squeeze."

My mother, ladies and gentlemen.

Nabijem te na kurac.

Nailed it shut. Mental.

Ne, ne, ne, ne. Stop.

Never been on an ice rink before?

Never mind.

Never tried it. I'm gonna wing it.

NEWSWOMAN: They called today the Brexit Betrayal Rally.

Nice covering.

Nice cup of tea. Okay.

Nice landing.

Nice of you to volunteer.

No call, no Twitter,

No chance. Tom who?

No matter what I might have actually wanted to do.

No Snap... chat shot.

No, but can I press you to a custard cream?

No, but she was happy about the attention.

No, he couldn't afford to retrain,

No, I agree. One, and she's out.

No, I didn't think you were.

No, I made a delivery here.

No, I mean, she's not listening.

No, I volunteer in here.

No, I, uh, moved out on my flatmate today.

No, I'm good. Thanks.

No, I'm just saying, she's causing an obstruction.

No, I'm just... doing something for someone.

No, I've just come back from helping the needy.

No, it's funny. I'm all right about it, actually.

No, it's never gonna happen.

No, Kate...

No, mate. You had the full English last night.

No, no, no, no, no, no!

No, no. (grunts)

No, no. Sorry.

No, she is still ill... why is she still

No, that one is down 30 thou.

No, that was you playing it four times in a row.

No, that's that's an hour of pure heart and soul.

No, that's that's an hour of pure heart and soul.

No, you can't do that. No, no, no, no, no.

No?

No.

No.

No.

No.

No. Come to think of it, no one's ever

No. I'm just not hungry.

No. No one lives here.

No. No, divorce is for the rich.

Not completely true. I do have a phone.

Not exactly.

Not for me.

Not in your wildest dreams.

Not knowing, you know, being inconsistent?

Not really. I'm 26.

Not to hear nothing.

Nothing feels right.

Nothing out of the ordinary.

Nothing.

Nothing. Katarina.

Now I am intrigued.

Now I must learn to love sauerkraut.

Now I sing an old song from Croatia,

Now I've got to go to work.

Now is not the time for unpleasantness.

Now is the time... for romance!

Now she's wasting her life, which only a miracle save her.

Now what?

Now you are here, we have krem torta.

Now, I'd like to thank everyone individually,

Now, some of the girls, they used to come, take a seat,

Now, which baby is it going to be?

Now, you listen to me and you listen good.

Of all the things in my life,

Of course not, idiot.

Of course not.

Of utterly hilarious elf jokes for one night.

Of your battered conquests, it's...

Oh, all right now, PC Trenchant Old Baggage.

Oh, bugger off with your cleanly manliness.

Oh, bugger off, person who has never met my parents.

Oh, but I just like stress.

Oh, Christ.

Oh, dear God, not like my mum.

Oh, for God's sake, shut up, will you?

Oh, God, don't you start.

Oh, God, you're a piece of work.

Oh, God.

Oh, he's just... I don't know.

Oh, I'm ashamed of who I am?

Oh, it's a... oh, it's a techno manger.

Oh, jebote, Marta. I'm sorry.

Oh, LOL. You know what?

Oh, my God, you did like him. (gasps)

Oh, no, no, no. These are just my work clothes.

Oh, previous owner.

Oh, she's drinking like the pirate.

Oh, so now it's my issue?

Oh, thank God. You still have time.

Oh, thanks.

Oh, that's... lovely.

Oh, this is my, uh, floor show.

Oh, trust you to come up with something understanding.

Oh, uh, sorry. No, no, no, it was, uh...

Oh, well, I just wish I knew.

Oh, when I try to say it,

Oh, wow.

Oh, wow.

Oh, wow.

Oh, yeah, this is your favorite song.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. I forgot.

Oh, yeah. There's no room for clutter here.

Oh, you are very good.

Oh, you definitely don't need any help doing that.

Oh, you know, fine.

Oh. Good to have dreams.

Oh. Have a look over there.

Oh. So not.

Oh. What do you do?

Oh...

Okay, I got to go. Bye.

Okay, let's go through the list.

Okay, then.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. I'll see you later.

Okay. Oh, no. Hang on.

On your big celebration dinner, where is your girlfriend?

One of us should sleep.

One thing someone said to me helped me.

Oof. Harsh.

Ooh, I think when I got really ill.

Ooh, started on what?

Ooh.

Ooh.

Ooh.

Ooh. Gently does it.

Ooh. I wish somebody would.

Ooh. Thanks.

Or maybe you do.

Or maybe you do.

Or smelling like a bin.

Or someone.

Or whoever wins the moral superiority prize.

Otherwise, I wouldn't get the insurance.

Ow!

Ow.

PETRA: Alba?

PETRA: Very small.

Piss off, Klaus!

Place is so tidy.

Please don't come here uninvited again.

Please wait, please wait, please wait!

Please? Thank you.

Plus, I've never seen an elf audition before.

Probably just scared of what he feels about you.

Really hot.

Really?

Remember? Look, I've come from work.

Repeat the experience?

Right behind that shrub.

Right there.

Right.

Right. Yeah, see, the thing is, he's not homeless.

Roll up, you shower of gobblers.

Roll up!

SANTA (hushed): Yes.

Santa has elves, you know.

Santa kind of hates me.

Santa, can you get down here, please?

Santa, um, I think I can take over from there.

SANTA: This is a big nutcracker.

SANTA: This is Christmas music.

SANTA: Uh, depends on how big are your nuts.

SANTA: Yes, you can have a look.

SANTA: Your mother again?

Santa?

Santa. She's Chinese, so she's, you know,

Saturday.

Second promotion.

Seconds away. I just, um...

See, Mum, that isn't a compliment, you know.

Seriously, Marta, I am sorry.

Serves you right.

Shall we go get my phone from that cupboard?

She doesn't want to talk to you.

She got more.

She is very, very...

She just loves Christmas more than anything else.

She lives in the flats around the back.

She runs a brothel down in Bethnal Green.

She sort of flowered under it like a...

She talks less.

She's also planning a dinner to celebrate my promotion.

She's also planning a dinner to celebrate my promotion.

She's been ill.

She's eating rubbish when she is outside.

She's my oldest friend.

She's never coming home,

Shut up, lock up, and good night.

Since the operation

Since you came back, you started losing your shit.

Sing it cheerfully, for God's sake.

Sing me to sleep?

Sing.

Skaters fall. It's fine.

Slightly serial killer y about you?

Small but compact. It's neat.

So clean up your mess, you stupid, stupid girl.

So he's out all the time.

So I brought my own.

So I defer to the Swiper queen.

So I didn't get that Frozen job.

So I thought I'd see if you fancied

So I'm glad that we bumped into each other.

So I've decided to call him "Boy."

So please ask her if she saw anything.

So take your stupid phone out of your stupid cupboard

So, did you find your Tom, then?

So, it went well, and I am happy.

So, now, you care about this.

So, please, could you just leave, okay? Just get...

So, shall we get started, then?

So, this is our selection

So, what, you're gonna move back home?

So, what's your plan?

So, when's your next audition?

So, where is See Through taking you?

Some bloke was outside the shop playing silly buggers.

Some sort of a weird token thing

Some sort of science experiment that's gone wrong.

Someone really isn't gonna get the chance.

Someone's here. Look, okay, bye.

Something wrong with your favorite cake now?

Sorry I'm so casual.

Sorry, mate.

Sorry! Late for an audition.

Sorry.

Sorry. It's been a mad day.

Sound like a death threat.

Speak English, or get out of my sodding country.

Speaking of which, be a pet and serve the teas

Stop. You are very bad girl.

Sure.

Sure. Never wanted kids anyway. (grunts)

Ta ta ta. Would you like a biscuit, Arthur?

Take your pick, young lady.

Tell Rufus this one's much harder to torch.

Than you've had hot dinners, mate.

Thank you so... I'll be with you around 8:00.

Thank you, Dad.

Thank you, Doctor. Thank you so much for your time.

Thank you, though.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. Take care.

Thank you. Thank you.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks. Great parenting. Great.

That I had made a career out of being a victim.

That I will probably never stop being sorry.

That I'm glad that she has you.

That is really nice.

That is very nice.

That is why I have this shop.

That Kate needs to talk to him?

That makes me feel, like, I don't know...

That sounds like quite a healthy choice.

That was like poetry in motion.

That was like watching a short Scandinavian film.

That was minimal.

That was so psychic.

That you and I never got the chance

That's just... that's just rude.

That's like saying you should try death.

That's my analyst. So sorry.

That's not right.

That's very nice.

That's why he keeps it so tidy.

That's why I took you on full time.

The "there's something I've got to tell you" moment. Okay.

The dinner to celebrate your promotion.

The even bigger nutcrackers around the corner.

The homeless.

The human race would just die out.

The modern dating application you might have heard of.

The most selfish woman in the world?

The one you keep looking out the window for

The penalty for lateness.

The reason we are lucky is because helping each other

The sound engineer's gone home.

The war is over long time ago.

The whole auditioning thing in general.

Then they just expected me to be normal and get on with life.

Then why?

Then you just need to say it, because I...

There is nothing more to know.

There must be a story attached to them.

There we are.

There you are, sir. Enjoy your festive hybrid Hanukkah bush.

There you go.

There. You see it?

There's always something, isn't there?

There's no such thing as normal.

There's nothing conclusive here,

There's plenty of seats.

There's something wrong with me, you know.

They are reason your life is bad."

They are reason your life is bad."

They made me feel special when I was ill.

They point a finger.

They say, "Those people,

They send us all back.

They took it and threw it away.

They took out my heart.

They're not gonna send you back.

Think about it.

This bed, it's like sleeping on a pile of kittens.

This is a fish knife.

This is close enough for now.

This is gonna be so good for my sex life. (chuckles)

This is my best thing.

This is my elf.

This is my employee. She locked up last night,

This is why I love to come in here.

This is your crime number. You'll need it for insurance.

This is your home.

This isn't what it looks like. I just...

This.

To be honest, you're not really mine.

To become a famous singer and die like Kurt Cobain,

To everyone who's put so much hard work in.

To know each other.

To make it look like a break in.

To say that she's cleverer than me.

To, say, persuade you?

TOM (sighs): Okay.

Tom, I said... "we."

Tom, who lives here but is selling the flat.

TOM: He's recently divorced.

TOM: Never more than once, anyway.

TOM: No.

TOM: Not many people do.

TOM: That's Ursula.

Tom.

Tom. Um, h he's tall...

Try and keep it down to... Oi, oi.

Turn a blind eye.

Turns out...

Uh, Crumpet?

Uh, for instance, this Christmas gibbon.

Uh, I don't think so, unless he's with you.

Uh, it it's broken.

Uh, someone Webster, I think.

Uh, we're both famously misunderstood

Uh, yeah, I actually do.

Uh, you know we could book you for causing an obstruction?

Uh, youngish bloke. Sad, really.

Uh... (laughs)

Um, and now he stays away from home as much as he can

Um, anger, shame, resentment,

Um, excuse me for just one moment. Santa!

Um, I was just... I was just wondering

Um, one second.

Um, right, well, so I knew the lighting would be crap,

Um, well, he works here.

Um, yeah. Take it away,

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um... do you need any...

Upon his vehicle.

Very common this time of year.

Wait. Hang on. Did you... like him?

Was that physical intimacy?

Was, uh, Santa involved?

Wasting my life. Thanks, Mum.

We are so lucky to be able to help each other

We have many... dissimilar items.

We weren't so lucky, you and I.

We woke him up.

We would have contraceptive beer.

We... are so lucky to be alive.

We'll be in touch if we hear anything.

We're just gonna need to dial this down.

We're kindred spirits.

Webster.

Weirder than total strangers

Welcome to my secret little garden.

Well, "dick" means "penis."

Well, consider away, because it's a no.

Well, don't panic.

Well, fine. Okay.

Well, for instance, we could go for a walk together.

Well, I can pay you back.

Well, I don't see the night lot, me.

Well, I got so tired of staring at my hand all day.

Well, I I didn't. I was press ganged.

Well, I think I've got one up my sleeve.

Well, I'm...

Well, it's not that dissimilar.

Well, love me, love George Michael.

Well, maybe she enjoyed being needed again.

Well, maybe we should just leave it, then.

Well, maybe you can focus your attention

Well, now I know.

Well, only if you promise to judge me.

Well, someone looks not rested.

Well, thanks, Bono or Mother Teresa

Well, that is quite the slippery slope.

Well, they'll think I'm a dick if I don't.

Well, uh, 'cause it's Monday.

Well, we... (sighs) He just won't commit

Well, we're done here.

Well, what's he doing here, then?

Well, where have you been?

Well, yeah. She was, actually, yeah.

Well, you just told me Gideon's.

Well, you never know. (chuckles)

Well, you're not homeless.

Well, you're not used to looking up.

Were you coming to see me?

Wha... Hey, Sleeping Beauty.

Wha... Oh, right, yeah, well, well, apparently,

What are you doing out so late?

What are you talking about?

What are you, psychic?

What do you mean? We ju... we ju...

What do you mean? We ju... we ju...

What do you want?

What I call Marta? Dog. I call you cat.

What I say?

What is it you were looking for?

What is rude? Why? Why is rude?

What is?

What it's mean, "cheerfully"?

What next, huh?

What she say?

What you don't understand. (clicks tongue)

What you know anything about this family?

What, with something that started as a Saturday job?

What?

What? (stammers)

What? Huang Qing Shin?

What? Me? No, fine. Totally fine.

What? Was there a squatter here?

What? You're looking at me like

What...? (stammers, scoffs)

What's all this "me" business anyway?

Whatever. Just ring her. Contact her.

When I was ill, it was a heart thing.

When she was always the b bright one?

When she's at home, she's eating my food, and it's good.

Where are you going?

Where are you taking me?

Where are you?

Where was that?

Where you are, huh?

Where's Alba?

Whether or not to engage in immediate foreplay?

Which is sort of the same thing.

Which will be hard because I am not a sour person.

While I get the soup sorted.

Who am I?

Who can make being sung to sleep sound like waterboarding.

Who doesn't even have a phone.

Who requires your specific assistance.

Who...?

Who's died?

Who's given to depression in much the same way as, um...

Who's she?

Whoa! (gasps)

Whoa.

Why are you always dancing about?

Why are you dressed like an elf?

Why are you so flexible?

Why can I feel you?

Why do you have to be anything?

Why do you keep trying to take me for a walk?

Why do you keep trying to take me for a walk?

Why don't you just get a divorce? Huh?

Why don't you just get a divorce? Huh?

Why don't you lot go back to where you came from?

Why is my life so shit?!

Why practical?

Why you not ring me when I worry about you?!

Why?

Why?

Will you be inviting Alba to the dinner?

Will you kiss me good night?

With feminism in general, but...

With my pathetic, inferior little brain.

WOMAN: But it's too big. We can't take that with us.

Wonderful. I can smell the commitment.

Working in silly Christmas shop

Would you like a bowl of soup? You've earned it.

Would you like to give me your number?

Would you like to...

Would you prefer the KGB?

Wouldn't mind finding him in my stocking.

Wow.

Wow. That's pretty amazing.

Wrong about what?

Y you sit there, and you think it's absolutely acceptable

Yeah, after you... what you've been through,

Yeah, all right. Peace out.

Yeah, but this admittedly rank burger

Yeah, except that I didn't dream of it, did I? You did.

Yeah, good for you.

Yeah, I can do that. Okay.

Yeah, I think so.

Yeah, I'm just gonna get the shit out my eye.

Yeah, Jenna, it's me. Listen, darling,

Yeah, Jenna!

Yeah, kinda, sorta.

Yeah, no, great, but can I get some sleep?

Yeah, no, I... I know it's not much.

Yeah, she was a singer back in, um, the homeland.

Yeah, that's 'cause of Arthur.

Yeah, there was just a terrible accident on the way here.

Yeah, well, can I just come in? Can I...

Yeah, when I worked at the pet shop,

Yeah, would you rather drive minicab?

Yeah, you know, when someone dies.

Yeah, you.

Yeah!

Yeah?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. (inhales sharply)

Yeah. Comfy where I am.

Yeah. Dad was a lawyer.

Yeah. I mean, you... Oh, you want crumble?

Yeah. Let me count the ways.

Yeah. No, we had a break in,

Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. You're feeling very thirsty.

Yep. Just wondering if Marta was in.

Yes, but it's not what I "do" do.

Yes, relentlessly. These are dark times.

Yes, yes, yes. Thank you.

Yes, you sleep. We talk morning.

Yes! Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yesterday, 17 times.

You all right?

You are famous with your krempita.

You are going to run out of friends with sofas.

You are never early. What are you up to?

You are now my cupboard door.

You are the furthest thing from an adult that I know.

You are very hard worker.

You can't call the audience names.

You can't depend on me.

You did this.

You do understand that?

You don't make joke about

You forgot to lock up.

You getting on?

You gonna be okay?

You have been like this all day.

You have been sick.

You have the best that modern medicine has to offer.

You just sort of... folded up.

You just... you've been disappearing for days on end.

You knew.

You know about. You have to be there.

You know the whole glowing,

You know why. And you know what?

You know, actually, if men had to do it,

You know, blokes and that.

You know, Dad can't be a lawyer here, so I had to be.

You know, from the ballet?

You know, genuine bollocks.

You know, how do you even know if you have a life?

You know, just a bit of psych work.

You know, really hard.

You know, that's that's riches, that is.

You know, when they get off on one.

You know? Like it made her more important.

You like your men tall, shy and translucent,

You like?

You live here.

You look like a Webster.

You look like you need another.

You look like you need another.

You make "have a merry Christmas"

You must enjoy it.

You must just love your job.

You need to rest more,

You need to take care of yourself better.

You never seen this alleyway before?

You now have a life. We wish you'd get on with it."

You okay?

You saw her not being depressed?

You seem to manage all right.

You should come with me, then.

You sing.

You take me for the full English now?

You taught her this terrible word?

You turned me into someone who broke the law.

You want to help us with the soup?

You weird little North Pole ian.

You were great at your job when you started.

You were so coming to see me.

You weren't kidding.

You, you load of tossers, in.

You... (laughs) You really don't know?

You'll do it for love.

You'll just flirt with him, and he'll forget to buy anything.

You're gay?

You're gonna have to help me decide.

You're never here.

You're not answering your phone.

You're not as weird as you look. Uh...

You're not really called Santa?

You're not yourself.

You're one of us now.

You're rehired.

You're right about that.

You're severely distressed and have just gone off on one,

You're so mysterious, I can't tell.

You're so negative.

You're the one who used the word "homeless."

You're the only person

You're the only person

You're the singer.

You're tired, you're overexcited.

You've got a way with people,

You've got one planned for tomorrow, which apparently

You've just poured out some very heavy duty stuff.

You've missed five doctor's appointments.

You've missed five doctor's appointments.

Your audition.

Your mother is still up.

'Cause of the war? Exactly.

"Crushing Disappointment the Elf." (laughter)

"Dick" means "penis"? "Dick" means "penis." Yeah.

(applause) (crowd murmuring)

(baby coos) (Jenna gasps)

(band joins in) (cheering and applause)

(bell jingles) (sighs)

(bell jingles) ♪ Well, it's been a year ♪

(blow dryer whirring) ♪ Hey, you're just too funky for me ♪

(brakes squealing) (horn honking)

(cheering, whistling) (music continues)

(cheering) PETRA: Oh, Alba. IVAN: Oh, lovely.

(chuckles softly) (horn honks)

(chuckles) (door opens, bell jingles)

(chuckles) (laughing)

(clears throat) ("Jingle Bell Rock" playing)

(crying, sniffling) I know.

(door closes) (Kate clears throat)

(door closes) Don't.

(door opens) WOMAN: Surprise!

(door slams) Not again! Stop. Shh.

(doorbell rings) ♪ Rock and roll TV... ♪

(drawer closes) (register beeps)

(electrical crackling) ♪ I gotta get inside... ♪

(gibbon screeches) (button clicks)

(groans) ♪ You gave it away ♪

(groans) Oh, my God. Oh! That looked painful.

(groans) Ow! (Tom chuckling)

(grunting) (Tom sighs)

(grunting): Oh, Christ. Oh.

(grunts) (screams) Oh, my...

(grunts) I'll see you at the store.

(grunts) Love you.

(horn honking) ♪ One day you say you will ♪

(horn honks, tires squeal) Sorry!

(horn honks, tires squeal) Sorry!

(horn honks) DRIVER: Oi.

(Jenna chuckles) Okay. Well, I'm off out.

(Kate chuckling) Ta da!

(Kate groans) You have phone.

(Kate hums quietly) Hmm, you're early.

(Kate squeals) TOM: Oh!

(kazoo buzzing) (Kate muttering)

(laughing) ♪ Mother of... ♪

(laughing): No. Are you waiting for Tom? (Andy laughs)

(laughs) (coughing)

(laughs) Remember me when you're at the top.

(laughs): Muffin? "Muff" for short.

(laughter) PETRA: But you remember what?

(man whistles) (man hooting)

(mocking): ♪ Stanite se... ♪ (laughter)

(raucous laughter) ♪ My memory ♪

(ringtone playing) I think somebody really

(Santa speaks Mandarin) Ow.

(scattered applause) (indistinct chatter)

(scoffs) What about you?

(screeches) ♪ This year ♪

(sighing, chuckling): Hi. Hey. Hi. Thank you so much.

(sighs) Madam?

(song ends) (cheering)

(speaking Serbo Croatian) (bell dings)

(speaking Serbo Croatian) See you next year.

(tires squealing) (loud thud)

(woman speaks Serbo Croatian) (Kate laughs)

♪ "I'm ready!" she cried ♪ (Kate chuckles)

♪ All we have to see ♪ (door closes)

♪ And legitimate ♪ Let me guess...

♪ And make them true somehow ♪ (lock buzzes, clanks)

♪ And make them true somehow ♪ (lock buzzes, clanks)

♪ But the very next day ♪ (kazoo plays melody)

♪ Do you recognize me? ♪ Do you recognize me?

♪ Dobra vecer japica ♪ PETRA: Oh... (laughter)

♪ Dun, dun, dun! ♪ Oh!

♪ He must have let us ♪ Oi!

♪ Is take these lies ♪ (call box buzzes)

♪ Japica ♪ (snickering)

♪ Of a white Christmas... ♪ (Santa chuckles)

♪ She drives me crazy... ♪ (clears throat) No.

♪ She drives me crazy... ♪ (groans)

♪ Snivat... ♪ (high pitched groan)

♪ Special, special, special... ♪ (screeches)

♪ Stanite se mamica ♪ Yes! Hey!

♪ That you're feeling inside ♪ (clicking teeth)

♪ Wake me up... ♪ (gasping)

♪ With ignorance ♪ Hi.

£27.35... (Nathan laughing)

a cappuccino while you wait. Wow.

a little stroll with me. Oh, that's my luck?

Ah! Oh, at last. Hey. Uh, there she is.

Ah. In fact,

Alcohol? Every once in a while.

All my friends were murdered. Okay, fine.

All right, all right, listen. (Petra scoffs)

All right, then. Need a hand?

And he... Ed.

and not completely horrifying. (chuckles)

And now, on with the show! (whistling)

And practical, too. Don't forget. (laughs)

and Santa's taken it really badly. Right.

And she's a... Hey.

and stop being so angry. Da. (Kate groans)

And UKIP said... Mum?

And you're a tosser, too. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

And you're a wanker. Maybe... (laughs)

And... ("Heal the Pain" by George Michael playing)

Anyway... So, how's your Tom?

Are they mice? Yeah, I think so.

Are you really all right? Yeah.

Arson? Come on, now.

Aw. Aw. Moje cedo. Mm.

bad cook, very bad. (Marta groans)

Blimey. (bird screeches)

Bliss. I'll be right back.

Blot. Mm, mm.

Bollocks is it. No, seriously.

Bollocks it is. (chuckles)

But it's it's true. Let's go, Mum. Come on.

But this one, look at him. Come on. Hey.

Charming. Jarring.

Check it out. What is it?

Come on! ♪ To novo leto faljeno ♪

Come on. Okay.

Come on. Get rid of that. Where...? Wait.

Come take a seat. No. Uh, no.

Cool. And...

DIRECTOR: Are you all right? I, uh... I did that

DIRECTOR: No, we can... KATE: Oh, no!

DIRECTOR: Thank you so much. Thank you.

Don't talk to me. But, listen, I...

Don't worry about it. Where do you work?

Dora, Dora, Dora. Loving the work. In.

eat better, drink less... Da. Da. Da.

Eat your mint. (laughs)

Ed. Ed. Ed was just so understanding.

every single day of the year. (chuckles)

Everyone can sing. Mm mm. Not me.

Ex grenadier. Will I do? Lovely. Um...

Exercise? Religiously. Not at all.

Fair enough. Fair enough. Yeah.

Fine. Totally fine. How's it all been?

for my family. Ah.

from getting on with our jobs. That's the prob... "Probate"?

Fry someone's fish? No, no, that was last week.

Get get out the... Right. I'm coming.

Going for a stroll with you? Might be.

Good night. Naughty.

Good night. Ugh.

Got it. Yeah, 'cause he doesn't have a phone.

Great. A cappella.

Ha, yeah. Sure you were. IVAN: Oh, really?

He likes it. What does he do?

He must be a volunteer. Yes. That's...

He'll probably turn up. Right.

He's more like my idea of... Jesus Christ.

Head. Sleep. Yeah, I am gonna...

Hello. Hi.

Here? Here.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. (laughing)

Hey, Kate. Thanks for this.

Hey, you are. Yes, you are. I not. Psst!

Hey. (bicycle bell dings)

Hey. Hey.

Hi. (yells) Hi. Hi.

Hi. Come and grab some food.

Hi. Hey.

Hi. How can I help you?

Hi. Sorry. Hi. Oh.

Hmm? Nice cup of tea. Okay. Hvala.

Hmm. KATE: Yeah, okay.

Hmm. Oh, everything's just such a mess.

Holding up? Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

How about being pregnant? Huh? (sighs)

How are you gonna dispose of my body? Shh...

How old are you? 45.

How so? Well, we're both singers.

How was your date? Really nice.

Huh? Um, I was volunteering at a homeless shelter.

I am a good person. Yeah.

I chose it for the shop. Really?

I curse the day I was born. Me, too.

I don't know. (laughing)

I have no idea. What's his name?

I I'm just... (clears throat) "Waste of Payroll the Elf,"

I just did it? You just did it.

I know. (Tom chuckles)

I think you're all enjoying. (cheering)

I want something to be... WOMAN: Listen. Be quiet.

I was so worry. (Ivan speaks Serbo Croatian)

I wish I were. (Kate laughs)

I work nights. Yes.

I'll be right... Time to sparkle!

I'll give it to him. Don't worry. Give it to who?

I'm all right, actually. MARTA: What? So, is there

I'm Andy. (chuckles) (Kate stammering)

I'm just so bored of your shit. Marta, stop. She's ill.

I'm not a dog. Well, you are wearing a collar.

I'm too trusting. (Tom scoffs)

I'm trying to explain. Uh, uh, whatever, you know.

In a crop top to audition. Yeah, I remember.

Is that donkey actually smiling at me? Yeah. Yeah.

It is. I love Christmas. No, you don't.

it was shit. (director chuckles)

It'll do. (chuckling)

It's "Kate." Ah.

It's "Kate." Ah.

It's a disco nativity scene. (laughing)

It's down here. Yeah.

It's for Frozen. What's that?

It's for sale? Oh, yeah, yeah.

It's Gideon. KATE: Yes.

It's good luck, you know. What is?

It's just locked in a cupboard. Why?

It's pretty cool, though, isn't it? Sure. Why not?

IVAN: Again, again, he... PETRA: This is also from him.

IVAN: Hmm. And all she's done, really,

IVAN: Yeah. PETRA: And and she's very happy.

Japanese blowfish? No, I have,

Just a little, tiny... Mm, tiny, tiny.

Just do it. Oh, don't just stand there issuing commands.

Just... Hey, elf!

KATE (laughing): Oh, my God. TOM: Yeah.

KATE (whispers): Second. Great achievement.

KATE: For your big nuts. Here we are. MAN: Oh.

KATE: I'm sorry. (Ivan mutters)

KATE: Oh, God. Probably just kids.

KATE: Oh, Mum! MARTA: No, mum.

KATE: Oh, Mum! MARTA: No, mum.

KATE: Oh. Just above the lip of the roof there.

KATE: What is this? TOM: Your people.

Kate? Katarina.

Kate. (stammers) Who said anything

Keeping up with the fruit and veg? Yeah, fine.

KGB! PETRA: Ne, ne, ne, ne. (lock clicking)

Leave him to me. Oh!

Less than minimum wage, then. Oi.

Like your mum? No, no.

Look at that. Oh.

Love it. It's like being in a dream.

Mamice. Moje cedo.

Marta, calm down. No, don't you dare

MARTA: Different uncle, guys. Christmas tiramisu.

MARTA: You showed me, Mum. A little beautiful picture.

Marta. All right, you don't care about anything,

Marta. Marta.

Me, obviously. Me, the mother, of course.

Meow. (clears throat)

Mm hmm. (cell phone chimes)

Mm hmm. Mm.

Mm mm. Yep.

Mm, ma chérie. No!

Mm. Been avoiding each other for years.

Mm. Go away.

More than taste or sanity. Yes, exactly.

Mum? They hate us.

Nabijem I tebe na kurac. MARTA: And you...

Nice. Yeah.

Nights, I think. Ah.

No, Dick is our neighbor. It also means "penis."

No, I do not want you to keep the staplers. Tom?

No, I'm interested. Huh.

No, it's... Married?

No, no! Oh, my God! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No, no. Mm hmm. Yes, yes.

No, no. I just came to find him. Oh.

No, really. Okay. It's a film...

No, there's... Uh, y you need space?

No, you... Look, if this is about commitment,

No. (laughing): No?

No. Ah, so?

No. Any reason in particular?

No. Mm hmm.

No. Oh.

No. You can't skate?

No. He works at Burger King. (laughs)

No. Okay. (laughing)

Nope. This is the narrowest alley in London.

Nope. Yep.

Not "needs." "Would like"?

Not really. Oh, shut up.

Of course not. Do you actually even

of nutcrackers. Working hard over here.

Oh, Alba. IVAN: Thank you, Alba.

Oh, and that's Geoff, a Mafia don. Really?

Oh, bloody hell. Um...

Oh, boy. (laughing): This is...

Oh, kill me now. Uh oh. Family issues.

Oh, my God, he's coming back. Where?!

Oh, thanks a lot, Mum. Your favorite.

Oh, that's okay. It's just...

Oh, the bed. In the bed there.

Oh, the bus. (Tom grunts)

Oh, yeah, and a lot more to come. (both laugh)

Oh! Ow. (thud, objects clatter)

Oh. He owes £748 in child support.

Oh. He's wise. Mm.

Oh. Is there a bird in here? No.

Oi! Oh, sorry! Oh, crap.

Okay. And don't forget... look up.

Okay. You are number one. Get off the phone now!

on the silly buggers inside the shop. (phone ringing)

Oof. I sold four of these last week. I'm that good.

or Swiper or whatever it's called? Yeah.

Ow. Oh, yeah.

PETRA: Ah. Hey, at last. (chuckles)

Pillow. Pillow. Okay. Um, yeah, it's a pillow.

Piss off. Come on.

Place like this is a prime target. Mm.

Remember those? Of course I remember. I remember.

Remember? Yes.

Right, um... What?

Right, well, I've looked, and there it is. (chuckles)

said that to me before. Ah.

Santa, I didn't know you cared. I don't care.

SANTA: Goodbye, my people. KATE: Sorry. Ow.

Sausage Roll? Muffin.

See you later. Bye. Bye.

See you soon, Kate. Bye.

See you soon. See you.

Seen this? Seen what?

Sh... No, Ruf.

she is so lucky to have you. (chuckles)

She was. You show... I show you picture.

She's not ill anymore, Mum. She is not ill anymore, Petra.

Shh! I... am shh ing.

Shoo. Just go. Just go. Hold on. This is weird?

so I've got nowhere to stay. Mm.

So sorry. I'm late. CASTING DIRECTOR: Sorry.

so that's not even an insult. Santa, I...

so there was still room. Yeah. Yeah.

So, having not followed you here... Mm hmm.

So, you do this often? Only when I have to.

Sorry. Let's go. Kate, we'll see you in a... in a month.

Sorry... (screams) Whoa!

Sortez. (groans) (Fabien speaking French)

spent piddling into cups... (sighs) Of course it is.

Stop killing us with the song. (laughter)

Stop! Stop. ♪ When the dog bites... ♪

Swiper? Yeah.

Take care of my heart. (Kate sniffles)

Tchaikovsky? WOMAN: Ah.

Tell her she is. Yeah. PETRA: But, uh,

tell me to calm down, all right? (groans)

Thank you so much. Thank you so much. It's okay. It's okay.

Thank you. (door closes) (sighs) Bloody hell.

Thank you. What happened?

Thank you. Thank you. (Ivan laughing)

Thank you. Um... Come on, Mama, out we get. Sorry.

Thanks. (chuckling): You're welcome.

That bad, huh? Yep.

That is truly horrific. (Kate chuckles)

That's all. (cheering)

That's me. Mm. She could also be called

The auditions are closed now. Right, yes.

The plumber? Look... (stammers)

Then what can I do? Join a club.

There you go. All right. I am comin. I come.

These expensive? (rattling)

They believe. I know.

They took them. Mum, come on. Come on. I know.

They're both so darling. I tell you what.

This is naughty. Yeah.

This one? Yeah.

Tom, did you say? KATE: Yeah.

TOM: Uh... KATE: Okay...

Tom! (people murmuring)

Tom. Who's that, then?

Turn a blind eye to robbery? Oh, come on, you.

Two days. And I've been trying to find you.

Ugh, really? (laughs) Mm, yummy!

Uh, I'm so sorry. CASTING DIRECTOR: Sorry.

Uh, what it mean? It means helping, Mum.

Uh, yeah. This way.

Veselo. It's Christmas! (scoffs)

Wait. MARTA: Oh, for God's sake.

wants to get hold of you. Yeah, no, I know.

We don't know. (producer sighs)

We hardly know each other. Wha...?

We're we're leaving. Absolutely, we're leaving.

Well, I want to. But you're in.

Well... Bon appétit.

What have we here, then? ♪ Jingle all the way ♪

What is he doing with you? Nothing.

What you done? You look like dead person. Oh, yeah.

What? (gasps) Jesus.

What's up? "What's up?"

What's wrong with you? What?

Where are we going? This way. Come on.

Where are we going? This way. Come on.

where are you... (chuckles) Pop yourself over here.

Where have you been? (groans)

Where'd you come from? Well, what are you looking at?

Who's that, then? Uh, Tom.

Why don't you do it inside? Why don't you ring me?

With her law firm and her briefcase. Ah.

Would you stop saying "dick" and "penis"? It's just...

Yeah, I knew that. Not "dick." "Penis."

Yeah, I reckon it's just kids. Just kids.

Yeah, it's a real turd of a flat. Uh... Tom?

Yeah, it's all right. She never sleeps.

Yeah, now, get off, elf. (laughter)

Yeah, you were so coming to see me. Uh uh.

Yeah? Are elves always so cynical?

Yeah? Yeah, they lie to you about pregnancy.

Yeah. It's just bollocks.

Yeah. Like, yeah, I just said.

Yeah. Mum! PETRA: What?

Yeah. Mum! PETRA: What?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Cool.

Yeah. This is very...

Yeah. Your chariot awaits.

Yeah. I mean, it's very... Come on.

Yeah. I'm fine. I'm fine! Ah, you... you're fine.

Yes, I'm fine. (sets gibbon on counter)

Yes! IVAN: Thank you, Alba. That looks amazing.

Yes. (sets figure on counter)

Yes. Before we eat lesbian pudding...

Yes. Do you have something...

You again? What do you mean, "again"?

You are clean, hmm? This... Yeah, yeah, um...

You can't be in here! Yeah, no. Sorry, no.

You coming in? No, no, no.

You considered BASE jumping? (closes drawer)

You have your song, your big song in party. Yes.

You have your song, your big song in party. Yes.

You okay? (groans) No!

You say you're okay. KATE: Yep.

You see? You just did it. What do you mean,

You showed me last time. Easy, easy, easy.

You think so, too? Katarina.

You? Helping? Yes.

You're fired. (Kate chuckles)

You're gonna have to come back next time. It's too late.

You're my bestie. Please. I know. (grunts)

You're so weird. Keep looking up.

You're strange. I don't really... Weirder than Grabber

You've got a tummy ache. Give...

You've got the part. (stammers)

...and having made my delivery,

...being poked up the vag by strangers with cold hands,

...solid.

'cause I love Jason Statham,

'cause last week, he filled his pockets.

'cause tomorrow I've got a big audition for the West End.

"Bleeding Me Dry the Elf,"

"Every little action of the common day

"Here we are"?

"Katarina" is name.

"Kate" is not a name.

"saint" tattooed on your forehead?

"She"? Oh, is this like a "God being a woman now" thing?

"Why on Earth Is She Even Here the Elf."

"Yogh..." (hawking)

("Everything She Wants" by Wham! playing)

("Faith" by George Michael playing)

("Fantasy" by George Michael playing)

("Freedom! '90" by George Michael playing)

("Heal the Pain" by George Michael playing)

("Last Christmas" by Little Voices playing)

("Last Christmas" by Wham! playing)

("One More Try" by George Michael playing)

("Praying for Time" by George Michael playing)

("This Is How" by George Michael playing)

("Waiting for That Day" by George Michael playing)

(a la Elvis Presley): ♪ Uh huh, I'll have a ♪

(a la Elvis Presley): Thank you very much.

(applause)

(applause)

(bell continues jingling)

(bell jingles)

(bell jingling)

(bell tolling)

(bells jingling)

(bicycle bell dings)

(bicycle bell dings)

(bird chirping)

(birds chirping)

(both chuckle and sigh)

(both chuckle)

(both laugh, whooping)

(both laugh)

(both laughing)

(both laughing)

(both scream)

(both sigh)

(breathing heavily)

(chatter continues)

(chatter continues)

(cheering and applause)

(cheering swells)

(cheering, whistling)

(chuckles quietly)

(chuckles softly)

(chuckles softly)

(chuckles softly)

(chuckles)

(chuckles)

(chuckles)

(chuckles)

(chuckles)

(chuckles) Et voilà.

(chuckles) I nearly popped the baby out then.

(chuckling): I'm not sure if I've still got a job.

(clears throat)

(clears throat)

(clears throat)

(clears throat)

(clears throat)

(clears throat)

(clears throat)

(clears throat) Cup of tea?

(conversation continues indistinctly)

(conversation nearby in Serbo Croatian)

(crowd chuckles)

(crowd exclaiming, cheering)

(crowd murmuring)

(crowd shouting)

(dog barking in distance)

(dog barking nearby)

(door closes, bell jingles)

(door creaking quietly)

(doorbell rings)

(dramatically): ♪ Dobra vecer ♪

(excited chatter)

(exhales)

(Fabien exhales, inhales)

(fading): ♪ And Heaven, and Heaven and nature sing... ♪

(fading): ♪ Dobri ljudi sim doali... ♪

(footsteps approaching)

(footsteps crunching)

(fork clangs on table)

(gags)

(gasps, exclaims in Serbo Croatian)

(gasps)

(gasps)

(giggles)

(grand orchestral fanfare playing)

(groaning): Oh, my God.

(groans quietly)

(groans)

(groans)

(groans) Damn it.

(groans) I'm sorry, George.

(groans) Nabijem te na kurac, Marta.

(grunts rhythmically)

(grunts softly)

(grunts, shouts)

(grunts)

(grunts)

(grunts)

(grunts)

(heart beating faintly)

(high pitched voice): ♪ Last Christmas ♪

(hisses)

(horn honking in distance)

(horn honks)

(humming)

(imitating Sean Connery): Stay back.

(indistinct chatter)

(indistinct conversation)

(inhales deeply)

(inhales deeply)

(inhales sharply, exhales)

(Ivan speaking Serbo Croatian)

(jauntily): ♪ Dobra vecer japica ♪

(Jenna laughing)

(Kate chuckles quietly)

(Kate chuckles)

(Kate gasps)

(Kate groaning)

(Kate groans)

(Kate grunts softly)

(Kate grunts)

(Kate laughs)

(Kate shuddering)

(Kate sighs)

(Kate sighs)

(Kate stammers)

(Kate whistles)

(kazoo buzzing)

(kazoo buzzing)

(laughing): I just couldn't imagine.

(laughing): Oh, my God, I was just beginning to think

(laughing): Oh, my God.

(laughing): That's my girl.

(laughing): These, um, folk songs

(laughing): You are so strange.

(laughs)

(laughs)

(laughs)

(lock clicks, bell jingles)

(man grunts)

(Marta sighs)

(music playing quietly)

(music stops)

(music stops)

(muttering, grunting) Okay. Thank you.

(normal accent): Um, you know,

(opens drawer)

(organ playing George Michael's "Heal the Pain")

(over TV): Let me see. "A very messy Christmas."

(Petra exclaims in Serbo Croatian)

(Petra sighs)

(playing "When the Saints Go Marching In")

(plays jaunty rhythm)

(power whirring)

(quiet chatter)

(quiet chatter)

(quietly): Ooh.

(quietly): Shut up.

(register beeping)

(riders murmuring)

(ringtone playing): ♪ She drives me crazy, she... ♪

(Santa chuckles)

(Santa speaking Mandarin)

(scoffs)

(Serbian accent): And, um, uh, what about your folks

(Serbian accent): I stay out of contact with the crazies.

(sighing): Bed.

(sighing): Oh, for God's sake.

(sighing): Oh, God.

(sighs softly)

(sighs, chuckles)

(sighs)

(sighs)

(sighs)

(sighs)

(sighs)

(sighs)

(sighs) Bit up herself, I thought.

(sighs) Oh, just...

(sighs) Okay.

(sighs) Okay.

(sighs): Christ.

(sighs): Okay.

(singsongy): Tra la.

(siren wailing in distance)

(siren wailing in distance)

(siren wailing)

(sniffles)

(sniffles)

(snoring softly)

(softly): Good sleeping.

(song ends)

(speaking Serbo Croatian)

(stammers quietly)

(stammers, grunts)

(stammers)

(takes deep breath)

(techno version of "Last Christmas" playing)

(Tom sighs)

(train passing in distance)

(TV continues playing quietly)

(weakly): Anyone like a cup of tea?

(whimpers softly)

(whispers): All right.

(whispers): Can we lie down?

(whispers): Happy. Happy.

(wind whistling softly)

(wind whistling softly)

(wind whistling)

(yawns)

♪ 'Cause God stopped keeping score ♪

♪ 'Cause God's stopped keeping score ♪

♪ 'Cause I will always, I will always, I will always ♪

♪ 'Cause I will always, I will always, I will always ♪

♪ 'Cause I would really, really love to stick around ♪

♪ 'Cause nobody else ♪

♪ 'Cause nobody else ♪

♪ 'Cause, teacher... ♪

♪ 'Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la... ♪

♪ 'Tis the season to be jolly... ♪

♪ "Boy, everything she wants is everything she sees" ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ A sleighing song tonight ♪

♪ A sleighing song tonight ♪

♪ All out to play ♪

♪ All we have to do now ♪

♪ And all God's children ♪

♪ And everything you want and everything you see ♪

♪ And Heaven and nature sing ♪

♪ And Heaven and nature sing ♪

♪ And I guess it was enough for me ♪

♪ And I know all the games you play ♪

♪ And in case you didn't hear ♪

♪ And legitimate excuses ♪

♪ And maybe we'll have something to show ♪

♪ And maybe we'll have something to show ♪

♪ And most of us are not sure ♪

♪ And most of us are not sure ♪

♪ And now we're six months older ♪

♪ And people on the streets... ♪

♪ And the next you tell me you won't... ♪

♪ And the wounded skies above ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪ Be a place that your heart can embrace? ♪

♪ Be a place that your heart can embrace? ♪

♪ Be a place that your heart can embrace? ♪

♪ Be good to yourself 'cause nobody else ♪

♪ Be good to yourself 'cause nobody else ♪

♪ Be good to yourself ♪

♪ Be praying for time ♪

♪ Because I got to have faith, faith, faith. ♪

♪ Because I played them, too ♪

♪ Because I said you were the perfect girl for me ♪

♪ Before I give my heart away ♪

♪ Bells on bobtail ring ♪

♪ Bells on bobtail ring ♪

♪ Blue Christmas without you... ♪

♪ Blue Christmas without you... ♪

♪ Brand new clothes and a big fat place ♪

♪ Bravo, Mama. ♪

♪ Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens ♪

♪ Brown paper packages tied up with string ♪

♪ But I gotta think twice ♪

♪ But if you don't ♪

♪ But if you kiss me now ♪

♪ But the very next day ♪

♪ But the very next day ♪

♪ But the very next day, you gave it away ♪

♪ But the very next day, you gave it away ♪

♪ But the very next day, you gave it away ♪

♪ But we'll take our chances ♪

♪ But we'll take our chances ♪

♪ But you still catch my eye ♪

♪ Crept out the back door ♪

♪ Crept out the back door ♪

♪ Dashing through the snow ♪

♪ Deck the halls with boughs of holly ♪

♪ Dete, spavaj ♪

♪ Detko moze ♪

♪ Didn't know what I wanted to be ♪

♪ Didn't know what I wanted to be ♪

♪ Do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do, do do do do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do, do do do do do... ♪

♪ Do do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do something for me ♪

♪ Do something for me ♪

♪ Do you recognize me? ♪

♪ Do you think we have time? ♪

♪ Do you think we have time? ♪

♪ Don't leave me hanging on like a yo yo ♪

♪ Dreaming of a sunnier day ♪

♪ Dreaming of a sunnier day ♪

♪ Dreaming of a sunnier day ♪

♪ Excuses ♪

♪ Fa la la la la, la la la la ♪

♪ Find somebody else ♪

♪ God rest you merry, gentlemen... ♪

♪ Gotta have some faith in the sound ♪

♪ Hand in hand ♪

♪ Hand in hand with ignorance ♪

♪ Hanging on to hope ♪

♪ Has got a body like you, oh ♪

♪ Has the power to make you happy ♪

♪ Has the power to make you happy. ♪

♪ Has the power to make you... ♪

♪ Have a holly jolly Christmas ♪

♪ Have a holly jolly Christmas this year. ♪

♪ He just kept drinking ♪

♪ He just kept smoking ♪

♪ He must have let us all out to play ♪

♪ Heaven knows I was just a young boy ♪

♪ Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells... ♪

♪ Hey. (chuckles) ♪

♪ How can I help you? ♪

♪ How can the outside world ♪

♪ How can the outside world ♪

♪ How can the outside world ♪

♪ How could it have, baby? ♪

♪ How could it have, baby? ♪

♪ How could it have, baby? ♪

♪ I can heal the pain ♪

♪ I can heal the pain ♪

♪ I don't know what the hell you want from me, oh... ♪

♪ I gave you my heart ♪

♪ I gave you my heart ♪

♪ I gave you my heart ♪

♪ I guess I must have loved you ♪

♪ I guess somewhere along the way ♪

♪ I guess somewhere along the way ♪

♪ I guess we always, guess we always knew ♪

♪ I guess we always, guess we always knew ♪

♪ I guess we always, guess we always knew ♪

♪ I just hope you understand ♪

♪ I just sit here on this mountain ♪

♪ I keep my distance, but you still catch my eye ♪

♪ I know how low you can sink ♪

♪ I know how low you can sink ♪

♪ I know not everybody ♪

♪ I know you'd fool me again ♪

♪ I never dropped a pill in a drink ♪

♪ I never dropped a pill in a drink ♪

♪ I never picked a fight in my life ♪

♪ I never picked a fight in my life ♪

♪ I said I guess it was enough for me... ♪

♪ I think it's time I told you so ♪

♪ I think there's something you should know ♪

♪ I was every little hungry schoolgirl's pride and joy ♪

♪ I was leaning on the grass ♪

♪ I will always try to get my shit together ♪

♪ I will always try to get my shit together ♪

♪ I will not give you up ♪

♪ I won't let you down ♪

♪ I won't let you down ♪

♪ I wrapped it up and sent it with... ♪

♪ I'll give it to someone special ♪

♪ I'll give it to someone special ♪

♪ I'll give it to someone special ♪

♪ I'll give it to someone special ♪

♪ I'll give it to someone special ♪

♪ I'll give it to someone special ♪

♪ I'll give it to someone special... ♪

♪ I've had enough of danger ♪

♪ If I could touch your body ♪

♪ If she was a hippie ♪

♪ If we have too much ♪

♪ If we have too much ♪

♪ In a one horse open sleigh ♪

♪ In some other face ♪

♪ Is out of reach, not good enough ♪

♪ Is that I don't... ♪

♪ It doesn't surprise me ♪

♪ It's hard to be more than we've seen ♪

♪ It's hard to be more than we've seen ♪

♪ It's hard to be more than we've seen ♪

♪ It's hard to be more than we've seen ♪

♪ It's hard to be more than we've seen. ♪

♪ It's hard to love ♪

♪ It's the one good thing that I've got ♪

♪ Joy to the world ♪

♪ Just hear those sleigh bells jingling ♪

♪ Just let me go ♪

♪ Just trying to find some peace ♪

♪ Know that I will be waiting for the day ♪

♪ Land of hope and glory ♪

♪ Last Christmas ♪

♪ Last Christmas ♪

♪ Last Christmas, I gave you my heart ♪

♪ Last Christmas, I gave you my heart ♪

♪ Last Christmas, I gave you my heart ♪

♪ Laughing all the way ♪

♪ Laughing all the way, ha ha ha ♪

♪ Let Earth receive her King ♪

♪ Let every heart ♪

♪ Let me tell you a secret ♪

♪ Let me tell you a secret ♪

♪ Let me tell you a secret ♪

♪ Listen to my simple story ♪

♪ Listen to my simple story ♪

♪ Listen to my simple story ♪

♪ Look around now ♪

♪ Look around now ♪

♪ Looking for a different space ♪

♪ Looking for a different space ♪

♪ Looking for a different space ♪

♪ Making spirits bright ♪

♪ Making spirits fly ♪

♪ Maybe we'll have something to show ♪

♪ Melody, melody... ♪

♪ Merry Christmas ♪

♪ Mm ♪

♪ My daddy was a toker ♪

♪ My heart, my heart is better than that ♪

♪ My heart, my heart is better than that ♪

♪ My heart, my heart is better than that ♪

♪ My mama was a joker ♪

♪ My memory serves me far too well ♪

♪ My memory, my memory ♪

♪ Na kraju ♪

♪ Now I know what a fool I've been ♪

♪ Now I think it's time... ♪

♪ O'er the fields we go ♪

♪ Of the beggars and the choosers ♪

♪ Of the beggars and the choosers ♪

♪ Oh, but I need some time off... ♪

♪ Oh, by golly ♪

♪ Oh, it never came ♪

♪ Oh, it never came ♪

♪ Oh, it never came ♪

♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ On the day that she looked at him and said, "I do" ♪

♪ On your rock and roll TV ♪

♪ On your sorry lives ♪

♪ On your sorry lives ♪

♪ Once bitten and twice shy ♪

♪ Once bitten... ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪

♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪

♪ Or raised a hand to my wife ♪

♪ Or raised a hand to my wife ♪

♪ Or saw my children as things to bully ♪

♪ Or saw my children as things to bully ♪

♪ Please let me try to ♪

♪ Poljubac ♪

♪ Praying for time... ♪

♪ Prepare him room ♪

♪ Put it in your heart and keep it ♪

♪ Put it in your heart and keep it ♪

♪ Put it in your heart and keep it ♪

♪ Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens ♪

♪ Ring ting tingling, too... ♪

♪ Say it's much too late ♪

♪ Say you love me ♪

♪ Serves me far too well... ♪

♪ She just wasn't thinking ♪

♪ Sinek dete maleno ♪

♪ Sinek dete maleno ♪

♪ So every day I see you ♪

♪ So if you love me ♪

♪ So please don't give me up ♪

♪ So you raise another glass ♪

♪ Somebody told me ♪

♪ Something that I want you to know ♪

♪ Something that I want you to know ♪

♪ Something that I want you to know ♪

♪ Spavaj ♪

♪ Special ♪

♪ Special ♪

♪ Special ♪

♪ Special. ♪

♪ Stanite se mamica ♪

♪ Stanite se mamica... ♪

♪ Take another, take another ♪

♪ Take back your picture in a frame ♪

♪ Take back your singing in the rain ♪

♪ Tell me, baby ♪

♪ Tell me, baby ♪

♪ That it would be stormy weather ♪

♪ That it would be stormy weather ♪

♪ That it would be stormy weather ♪

♪ That sometimes the clothes do not make the man ♪

♪ That you say you'll be mine ♪

♪ The Lord is come ♪

♪ The next you tell me you don't ♪

♪ The next you tell me you don't ♪

♪ The rich declare themselves poor ♪

♪ The rich declare themselves poor ♪

♪ The way that we show ya ♪

♪ The way that we show ya ♪

♪ The way that we show ya ♪

♪ The way that we show ya ♪

♪ The way that we told ya was decent ♪

♪ The way that we told ya was decent ♪

♪ The way that we told ya was decent ♪

♪ The way that we told ya was decent ♪

♪ Then I guess she was tripping on a high love you ♪

♪ There was a young lady called Florrie ♪

♪ There's so much to hate ♪

♪ There's someone else I've got to be ♪

♪ There's something deep inside of me ♪

♪ These are a few of my favorite things ♪

♪ These are the days ♪

♪ These are the days ♪

♪ These are the days of the beggars and the choosers ♪

♪ These are the days of the open hand ♪

♪ These are the days of the open hand ♪

♪ They crack a smile, talk a while ♪

♪ They will not be the last ♪

♪ They will not be the last ♪

♪ Thinking to myself, you're a fool, boy ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get by ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get by ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get by ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get by ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get high ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get high ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get high ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get high ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get high ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get high ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get high ♪

♪ This is how we want you to get high ♪

♪ This is the year of the hungry man ♪

♪ This is the year of the hungry man ♪

♪ This year ♪

♪ This year, to save me from tears ♪

♪ This year, to save me from tears ♪

♪ This year, to save me from tears ♪

♪ This year, to save me from tears ♪

♪ This year, to save me from tears ♪

♪ This year, to save me from tears ♪

♪ Till the jokes he could tell got very blue ♪

♪ Till the shit he was thinking sounded true ♪

♪ To save me from tears ♪

♪ To save me from tears... ♪

♪ Try to take your place ♪

♪ Turned his back ♪

♪ Turned his back, and all God's children ♪

♪ Wake me up before you go go ♪

♪ Well, it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me ♪

♪ Well, maybe we should all ♪

♪ Well, maybe we should all be ♪

♪ What fun it is to ride and sing ♪

♪ What fun it is to ride and sing ♪

♪ When there is no hope to speak of ♪

♪ Whenever you want me ♪

♪ Where the present meets the past ♪

♪ Where the present meets the past ♪

♪ Where the present meets the past ♪

♪ Who laid on her back in a quarry ♪

♪ Whose place is in the past ♪

♪ Whose place is in the past ♪

♪ Why don't you go down, find somebody ♪

♪ With a note saying, "I love you," I meant it ♪

♪ With her legs open wide... ♪

♪ You gave it away ♪

♪ You gave it away ♪

♪ You gave it away ♪

♪ You tell me you're cold on the inside ♪

♪ You tell me you're cold on the inside ♪

♪ Your daddy was a drinker ♪

♪ Your mama was a thinker ♪

£5.75, two euros